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Today, I'm thinking about Jesus Christ Superstar again (specifically the 2012 live arena version). Im thinking about how raw and desperate and viceral all of it is. Thinking about the inherit guilt and shame and anger is jesus and judas. How they can rail against the narrative all they want, can drag their feet towards the end, can go kicking and screaming, and it will end up the same anyway. How hard they fight against their fate, desperate to be heard. Judas begging Jesus to trust him, to listen to his concerns. "Listen Jesus, I don't like what I see. All I ask is that you listen to me, " Jesus begging God to have mercy, to answer the cries of his knly son. "God, god, why have you forsaken me?". Anout how Jesus begged for him mother as he was dying, about how scared and alone he was. Thinking about how Judas was right the whole time, that they did turn against Jesus, that it was out of his control. Jesus did want him, need him, to betray him for the sake of gods plan. "You wanted me to do it,". Thinking about how Judas didn't go to the rally with Jesus in hosanna, isntead watching over him from afar. About how all of the zealots who only saw jesus as a savior, half god half sacrificial lamb, and how judas was the only one not there. Thinking about anachronisms and using each others name like a curse. "You liar, you Judas." "Christ you deserve it. " Thinking about the love that threads them together, even if its not enough to save either of the.

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Today, i'm thinking about Hadestown and the celebration of a doomed narrative. I'm always a sucker for a doomed narrative, but for Hadestown, it's different because of course it's heartbreaking, its devestating and unfair and they're so close, but also because it's seen as a triumph. Because the very first song it tells you what this story is. Even if you dont know the story of orpheus and eurydice, it tells you the basics going in. It's an old song, it's a love song, and most of all it's a sad song. It's a tragedy. And then the rest of the musical is spent falling in love with the characters. The whole story is spent making you forget that first song. And it works. You're rooting for them, you want them to succeed. They're walking out of hell theyre gonna make it and they can be happy and orpheus turns around. And it feels like a betrayal, because it's so heartbreaking because how did you forget? It's made more so by the Road to Hell reprise, when Hermes retells yoy everything he already said. When he stops singing and tells you what you forgot. It's a tragedy. It feels almost like a beratement, because of course he turns around, that's how it goes. Why would this time be any different? It feels like a cruel reminder of our own stupidity.

And yet...it's not. Hermes says it himself. There's power in knowing how it ends and singing it again anyway. It's a celebration of that stubborness to see them get a happy ending. A celebration of the fact that we're all just little kids demanding the story be told again and to get it right this time Because they deserve their happy ending, they deserve to get out, even if we know it's impossible. It's triumphant because in the face of gods and death and hell itself, we are here demanding it be done again and again because they have to get it right eventually. And its true, because I listen to the soundtrack over and over and each time I get to the end my heart is ripped out of my chest because I thought it was going to end differently this time. And when it doesn't, I listen to it again. It's a blessing from hermes to be defiant in the face of cosmic forces for the simple fact that they were in love and they should get to be in love. A celebration of not the tragedy, but the refusal of it.

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Just finished I Saw the TV Glow, and I must say it has quickly become my favorite movie I've ever had the honor to watch.

There's so much beauty in it in so many different ways. It is a compassionate and raw perspective on transness and mental illness and feeling empty and nostalgia and isolation. Not only was the writing excellent my god the acting and the cinematography had me in tears. Some things I loved about the movie.

1. The writing (obviously)

The way this movie is a metaphor for so many different things that seem separate but are all intertwined is breathtaking. Something I found fascinating is at the end I didn't even really sit there trying to decide if it was all a psychotic break or it they really were from a tv show because it didn't matter. Because at the end of the day, it was still about being too afraid to be yourself. About holding it all in until you break. About life moving too fast but being too slow and monotonous. It was about fearing who you are and never taking the dive because it sounds crazy and you can't. It's about regret. It's about soulmates, about that on person who you never have to lie to. In the end, it would still be about those things whether or not there really was a tv show or not.

2. Cinematic Decisions

The filming decisions in this film made it what it was. One of the things I found fascinating was the lack of a true soundtrack. There wasnt particularly a lot of background noise excpet for chatter on the TV. All of the conversations and days are smothered in this thick heavy silence. The silence is so prominent it feels like its own character. The graininess and static making it feel like an actual tv show. The colors, the sickening neon glow from everywhere all the time. The unsteady camera and wide shots.

3. The relationships

While Maddy and Owen are amazing on their own, their relationship is the most compelling part of the story. Both feel alone and broken and like theres something wrong with themselves but not as much around each other. We see Owen isn't really talkative or open with his mom, that he barely says anything at all to her, but with Maddy almost immediately, he feels a connection to her. He seeks her out again and again. Owen doesn't have anything resembling a relationship with anyone else. He barely has dialogue with other characters. In the scene where his dad is holding him under the shower, he doesn't say a word, doesn't even look at him honestly. He says near the end he has a family, but we don't even see them. But with Maddy, he is close to her. They're intertwined, and around each other, they admit truths and secrets it doesnt feel like they've ever said outloud before. Even when Owen is freaked out by Maddy, even when he pushes her away and runs, there's till love there. It's not rejection as much as fear, and maddy doesn't blame him.

4. Parallels and Callbacks

One of the main cinematic choices I found myself noticing over and over again was the colors surrounding Maddy and Owen. in the first scene they sit across from each other as Owen leans against a oink vending machine and maddy a black. Owen has a pink sleeping bag and a pink shirt and a pink dress. Maddy is more often seen in black and white. Some great callbacks are the scene where we find out Owen doesn't have a heart, and Maddy reminds him of the bleavhers where he said he was afraid someone would dig up his insides and find there is nothing there. Seeing the chalk on the road clearly for the first time and it being the ghosts and "there's still time".

My personal favorite scene is the scene where Owen watches the finale, and then his dad comes in to find him with his head on the TV, screaming and crying. To me, this scene is very reminiscent of an attempt. He's finally been pushed to the edge and flung off of it. he's been holding everything in for so long and he can't take it anymore. Its heartbreaking in every way.

All in all this is a fantastic movie I highly recommend. All my love to the writers producers and directors.

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its on sight

reblog to put john winchester in the meat grinder!!!!!!!! mince him!!!!!!!

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12 is honestly so beautifully written and peter capaldi d e l i v e r e d

I love the twelfth doctor so much hes everything to me. Do you think i care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference I do what i do because its right because its decent and above all its kind just that just kind stand with me its all ive ever wanted im just a bloke in a box telling stories and im not here because im ashamed a bit of shame never hurt anyone i came because youre sick and you asked i thought i sent you to birmingham for a packet of crisps i lived among otters for a month you look at me and you cant see me do you have any idea what thats like london what a dump clara am i a good man i’ll lose any war you like i’m sick of losing people look at you with your eyes and your never giving up and your kindness one day the memory of that will hurt so much i wont be able to breathe and ill do what i always do i’ll get in my box and i’ll run and i’ll run in case the pain ever catches up wherever i go it will be there when you fire that first shot no matter how right you feel you have no idea whos going to die!! You dont know whos children are going to scream and burn. How many hearts will be broken!! How many lives shattered!! How much blood will spill until everybody does what they’re always gonna have to do from the very beginning, sit down and talk!!!! You’re all the same you screaming kids look at me im unforgivable well heres the unforseeable I forgive you after all you’ve done I forgive you don’t run stay with me never be cruel never be cowardly run fast laugh hard be kind everything ends and its always sad but everything begins again too and thats always happy be happy ill look after everything else thats the trouble with hope its hard to resist!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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boop

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they so dumb and i think its one of their best qualities.

Dan and Phil being on YouTube for 15+ years and still having no idea how to connect a camera is so fucking funny lmao

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people also use this idea of the show "falling off" to just be misogynistic. Jodie whittaker is a fantastic actress, as seen in other projects she's acted in, and blaming her for personal dislikes with the writing is horrible and inexcusable. I think she has some great episodes, and i think there were some misses. But the same applies to every single doctor. There is something to be said about your first doctor having a special place in your heart, but that shouldn't be turned into hating every single other doctor, or using that fondness as an excuse to attack the show for diversity. For instance people are coming out and calling doctor who "woke" now, as if it hasnt always included lgbtq characters??? Yes, some of the dialogue around rose in the 60th anniversary special was clunky, but it wasnt awful and most importantly it didnt distract from the episode. If the fee pieces of dialogue about Rose being nonbinary destroyed the episode for you i can guarantee its because you could not move on from it due to hatred, not because it overwhelmed the episode. There have always been lgbtq characters in doctor who, but i think that usually its not focused on or explicitly stated as much because of the differences in culture and acceptance. It is brought up around Rose in the special in regards to her own personal struggle with identity and the discrimination she faces. Most other characters for are queer in the show just are, and its accepted by the culture thay surrounds them. Lets not forget Jack Harkness, who would flirt with anything that could consent, Jenny and Vastra, reptile from the dawn of time and her wife. River Song had a wife, clara said she and jane austin kissed, BILL. I mean 11 met a transgender horse!!! Attacking newer episodes and eras for containing queer characters and claiming to love 10 and 11s era is hypocritical and outright weird.

Anyway, long tangent to say; i agree with OP that people romanticize earlier eras and are steadfast in their beliefs that newer eras and soctors will be trash, which is just not a great outlook. I also wanted to add the layer of people who are angry at the new "wokeness" while loving old eras.

hot take but i think some whovians who believe doctor who was at its best with tennant or smith will never be happy with the show. comparing new episodes to the feeling of nostalgia is a fight that no showrunner or actor can win. there were issues with moffat and chibnall's eras of course but they were by no means the train wrecks that people say. i've been rewatching some of tennant's run and let me just say, if some of those stories had whittaker in the titles then they would have been ripped to shreds. it's okay to have rose-coloured glasses (pun intended) for a particular era but man. people are setting themselves up for disappointment when the vibes of the new era aren't exactly the same as the original rtd run. i can see it now.

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literally hes just a little guy and he has nothing to apologize for

I’m not a Dean apologist because Dean has done too much wrong that I can’t justify, and I’m not a Cas apologist because Cas has never done anything wrong in his life

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every waking moment i think of my boy

it's been a hot minute (three years)

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15 being kind and caring to 14 was very sweet after years of the doctor hating themselves when they meet up, HOWEVER it is extremely funny that he was like 'bestie beloved babe you are SO traumatized you need to take a break...' as if he doesn't have. the exact same trauma fsdhkshdjfksd I feel like in his head he was like get AWAY from me you sad bitch if I'M repressing my feelings and YOU'RE repressing your feelings then WHO'S FLYING THE TARDIS

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The Mavity thing is godsent honestly because it's such a good counter argument for future drama. "This story was too silly" on the Mavity show? "This episode went so drastically against canon" an episode of the Mavity show? "That made no sense" on the show where they retconned gravity? "They race-swapped Isaac Newton but he was a real person who was white" you mean the same episode that also renamed the real life concept of gravity?

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hes just like us fr

Can i just point out how fucking deranged it was for jackles to say dean's biggest regret was not being able to save cas instead of saying it was dying on that piece of rebar. Cuz jackles fucking HATES the rebar. We know this. He dunks on it every chance he gets. This wouldve been a great opportunity to rag on it disguised as a ha ha funny joke. But instead he. he

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Peak character development is the angel spending enough time on earth (with his disaster husband) to become That Guy

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im not even christian i sound insane. but the real ones get it and im right

good omens fans are cowards they're all like "ooh teehee my gay bible fanfic" meanwhile it is an entirely made up angel and demon. they are bible ocs. REAL bible fujoshis watch jcs. and ship the real actual canon judas and jesus. from the bible

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the way that jesus loved judas despite his flaws and judas loved jesus because of his flaws and the way they are trapped in the narrative and judas always had to turn hik in but he loves him and he didnt want him to die but he knew that the messiah was not the jesus he loved and how he knew his role and he had to play it

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Gonna cheat a little bit here and reference multiple songs but… these lines from Jesus Christ Superstar have been on my mind for a good while:

“If you strip away the myth from the man” “I remember when this whole thing began/no talk of god then we called you a man” “You sad pathetic man” “He’s a man/he’s just a man/he is not a king/he’s just the same as anyone I know/he scares me so”

I am sooooooo normal about the way Judas loves Jesus. Most other characters revere, deify Jesus, but Judas doesn’t do that. He loves not Jesus the Messiah, but Jesus the man. There’s something so tragic about the supposed traitor being the only one who truly understands Jesus’ struggles regarding his divine destiny (as showcased in Gethsemane). How do you love someone when your love is infinitesimal in the grand scheme of things, when the one you love is half god, half sacrificial lamb? When you’re not sure he’s even human? His accusations in The Last Supper is equal parts “you’re getting out of control” and “why must you sacrifice yourself this way when you’re just a man, why make your flesh and blood bread and wine?”. In my opinion, when it comes down to it, the logic behind Judas’ whole “your followers are getting out of control, I have no choice but to turn you in” thing is anger towards Jesus for becoming an idol and driving his followers into a religious craze, when he could’ve done his activism as a human. When you interpret it this way, Judas’ repeating “Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ, who are you? What have you sacrificed?” becomes so much more than bitter mockery; he’s demanding the one he loved to answer the question that tormented him all along.