underwaterdogballs

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this is killing me. get cherried idiot

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Christmas Milkers

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Weird when you first start paying attention to animal noises and realize they don't actually sound like the words we use

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the problem with everyone becoming a reviewer and essayist now is that, plainly and gently, a lot of these people are not smart enough for the position

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Friendly reminder that this is a war veteran

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academic who writes a paper and just puts "credit to original author :)" for all their citations

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My parents have a “Festivus” party every year and this year I found this sign on their bedroom door

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The Birdcage (1996) dir. Mike Nichols

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Mammon tries, he tries so hard. You'd never know with the way he keeps up his façade. "The loud boisterous idiot," a part he plays perfectly, one that he can hide his emotions and failures behind. But he tries so hard, and he hopes you see it- he knows you do.

There are those few times his eyes meet yours after a particularly kind stunt, covering for one of his brothers, giving away his time, etc., and all you do is smile at him, the corners of your eyes crinkling. Memories like those he treasures. But he knows you've seen him try, like really try, and he still can't tell whether he should be embarrassed or ecstatic.

He remembers that first time when you found him "asleep" at the coffee table in his room, how you calmly put all the papers he had been studying back into a neat stack and draped a blanket over him before quietly exiting. He held his breath the entire time, hoping you wouldn't hear his rapid heart rate. He felt so vulnerable. He was supposed to be alone all night so of course he'd study, he didn't want to be an idiot of course. Mammon had assumed you'd wake him up, get mad that he was slacking off, but you saw how hard he was working didn't you? You saw a side if him not even his brothers saw: a tired, hard-working, genuine side of him. Those late night studies were supposed to be a private thing of his, and yet he wouldn't trade that moment for anything in the three realms.

You loved him for the idiot he was, and you saw how hard he worked, so he'd keep giving it his all.

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I just got described as an "ad hating commie" by someone because I said a minute of youtube ads is unpleasant. fully spent 5 minutes arguing and defending youtube ads. insane stuff

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tiny hilsons because sometimes i'm crazy about them

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i have been laughing at this for 5 mins

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