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Me: I tell the kids a way more heroic version of what happened -

DM: what??

Me *now in character as my fighter*: there were ten of them, I was backed against a wall and had no way out and no help but I still made it out singlehandedly-

DM: OH I thought you said ‘erotic’ but you said 'heroic’, didn’t you?

Me: why the fuck would I tell all the orphans an erotic version of this fight?

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they…

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The best thing in life is when you encounter a giant bell in a video game, and when you attack it, it goes "bong".

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Since you work at Disney and love Team Rocket. How would you feel if they put Jessie and James in Kingdom Hearts?

LOL i mean i'm always down to see team rocket in stuff

but since they're not disney characters, they can use bella and bash

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Our party consists of a human artificer (my IRL husband) and a dragonborn paladin (me) who have a habit of seducing the local cat girl population wherever we go, a yuan-ti named lou whos patron is Elton from cat Twitter and their life goal is to become a cat and convert people to eltonism, and a brand new player who plays a shapeshifting druid named nix

We were having some ooc discussion

Me : Are tabaxis furrys?

DM: No, but those that like them are

My husband: Almost everyone in the party is for sure a furry then.

New player: Also any character who chooses to be an animal or animal kin is a furry irl confirmed

New player: Except Nix. Because she’s for sure not me vicariously exploring being a furry.

DM: I mean, this whole campaign has been taking place in the Furry Federation

By popular demand

Me: Where else do you expect 3 furries to want to be

New player: is [warlock player] a furry?

Me: Listen all im saying is Lou wants to be a cat very badly

Me: Assigned furry at dnd

Warlock player: AFAD

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A beastman and his knight ✨

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The Dating Game

(Context: by some bizarre turn of events, we’re all on the beach hosting a dating game show for a sea abomination king looking for a bride)

Sea King: Bachelorette number 2, there’s one part of my body I love most, and that’s my lips. Do you think I’d be a good kisser?

Druid, an avowed lesbian both IC and OOC: [is struggling for an answer]

Fighter: [posts a kissing fish gif in the Discord]

Druid: That is not helping! That’s doing the opposite of helping! [slips back into character through gritted teeth] You know… there’s more you can do with your lips than kissing…

Crowd: [loudly whistles and oohs]

DM: Those near the Druid can see that she’s hating life right now.

Druid: You���re not kidding.

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mortified

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This is probably the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life

source

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since it seems people are partially coming back to tumblr  😂 …but I’m still a lot more active on instagram (404.potato)

Gold foiled postcard prints available on my Etsy (404Potato) ✨

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(via w7uzcbav582a1.png (PNG Image, 1080 × 2340 pixels) — Scaled (33%))

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Stop memorizing my attack patterns. That's fucked up. Who let you do that.

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Haven’t drawn Bowser in years, so I figured I’d remedy that!