twhrider

[twhrider]

Baking is ridiculous. Stir these powders into a goo and them warm them up until they turn into some kind of edible sponge. Who came up with this.

[twhrider]

Naturalists have got to be one of the groups of people most susceptible to being tricked by the fae. Travellers these days are much less likely to follow a mysterious light or the smell of roast beef into the forest. Meanwhile, find me a naturalist who would not completely lose themself in pursuit of:

An unidentifiable bird call

A butterfly that’s slightly off-color

An opossum with its head stuck in a yogurt tub

A really big woodpecker

[twhrider]

You’re not selfish for wanting the same energy and love you give. Always remember that.

[twhrider]

"why do you want to work for us"

because im fucking BROKE!! im not going to write me x your company fanfic to answer this dumb ass fucking question the way you want me to!!

[twhrider]

if someone was willing to give you $1000, but you had to engage in an awkward email correspondence with them first, would you do it?

[twhrider]

you, reading this. you're a creature now. reblog to creature your followers

[twhrider]

are you worried

About what? But yeah

[twhrider]

Oh? You think the world is full of pain and suffering huh?

Well look into the big, soothing eyes of anomalocaris and maybe you'll stop being such a hateful idiot

[twhrider]

[twhrider]

in the mood for some whimsy tbh

[twhrider]

The Scientific Method

[twhrider]

the stupidest thing about mental illness is the short half life of reassurances. like yes I know you reminded me yesterday that I'm not secretly toxic waste that everybody wants rid of but that was like 18 hours ago and I forgor

[twhrider]

sraight up petting it. and by it. i mean my area

[twhrider]

did you know that its impossible to throw an egg really hard onto your bedrooms wall right now try it

[twhrider]

listen i do not mean this in a furry way at all and i know the actual tread of this would be ass but let me say. i would very much like it if there were boots that made animal tracks instead of boot tracks. i just think thatd be neat

[twhrider]

Customer started yelling at me because I was 1 minute late to open the shop so I banned him from shopping with us and locked the door on him. Play stupid games.