tunneldweller

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US Pentagon to be renamed "Polygon". "being vague about the number of sides it has keeps the enemy on their toes" says some military general guy

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i want you all to know that there is an artist (carmen papalia) who, after he started using a white cane, assembled a 12 foot long white cane and began using it in downtown vancouver. the length of the cane made it functionally useless as a device and the only purpose it served was making him an obstacle for sighted people. dare i say… 2019 goals

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Everyone talks about wanting monsters to do things to them. Well I desperately want to service top monsters. I want to find what feels good to them and do it over and over again. Just turn this big scary thing that could kill me into a pile of blissed out mush.

Edging a vampire, jerking off werewolf knot, preening a harpy, eating out a dragon, tying up a minotaur, I wanna do it all. I want all of them to growl, shriek, and hiss for me while I get them to cum over and over again.

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[ID: "#i asked a loved one who is a very accomplished primate anthropologist if this is true about orangs and he said it is! #and pointed out that they developed as relatively small spread-out island populations in resource-heavy rainforests #tool use? purely recreational. chimp-esque competitive drive/aggression? why. to what end. simply not necessary #what are you gonna do. declare troop war on Jennifer (single mom living 3mi away)?? grow up. #trek all the way to jennifer's house by urself to Conquer the same copious mangosteens u got at home? get a grip. there's bugs to stare at. #animals" end ID]

"You can say that [orangutans] are not dependent on social support and approval, and if you admire this in them, that an orang is irredeemably his own person, 'the most poetic of the apes', researcher Lynn Miles told me once in an unguarded moments. What she had in mind was the difference between orangs and chimps in the way they carry on their discourse with the world.

Chimps are much admired for their tool use and for their problem-solving relationship with things as they find them...the orang is, let us say, not so replete with enterprise. Give an orangutan the hexagonal peg and the several shapes of hole, and then hide behind the two-way mirror and watch how he engages with the problem.

And watch and watch and watch--because he does not engage with the problem. He uses the peg to scratch his back, has a look-see at his right wrist, makes a half-hearted and soon abandoned attempt to use his fur as a macramé project, stares dreamily out the window if there is one and at nothing in particular if not, and the sun begins to set. (The sun will also set if you are observing a chimp, but the chimp is more amusing, so you are less likely to mark the moment in your notes. An orang observer has plenty of time to be a student of the vanities of sunset.)

You watch, and the orang dreams...when casually and as if thinking of something else, the orang slips the hexagonal peg into the hexagonal hole. And continues staring off dreamily."

Vicki Hearne, "The Case of the Disobedient Orangutans"

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a good summary of the whole trump/melania memecoin thing:

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being self aware suuuucks like yeah this thought pattern/behavior is stupid and pointless and a symptom. i know this. [does it anyways

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a lot of folks on this website will specifically describe people as Cis or Neurotypical to signal someone is boring/basic when I think the word they're truly looking for in their heart is "normie" but they won't say it because it makes them sound like a 4chan user

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People who don't re-read books are so funny to me. "I know what happens"..?? Gurl I know what pizza tastes like, still gonna eat another one. I know what a rainbow looks like, you think that'll stop me running outside, camera in hand, to see the next one?

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ameircans talking about red note like they have never spoken to anyone from another country ever about anything

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queers use to throw bricks at cops and now all y'all do is cry about trans mascs / men existing in a way you dont like what the fuck happened. can we bring the bricks back please

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it’s so wild that trumps executive order has that bit about sex being assigned at conception.

I assume this is the anti-abortion position being encoded into the anti-trans legislation. no one is testing what gametes their embryo has— such a thing isn’t possible (embryos don’t produce them yet; there are primordial germ cells, but they aren’t differentiated as sperm or egg cells).

it just goes to show that gender/sex policing is never based on any science— there is no "scientific" definition to what “female sex” or "male sex" is. It doesn’t exist as a material reality. It is a legal construct that is assigned with the first legal documentation assigned to a subject—the birth certificate.

and that isn’t based on chromosomes or gametes. it’s a decision based on whether a doctor thinks the infant will be mostly likely to be capable of penetrative heterosexual sex as “female” or “male.” because penetrative heterosexual sex is the point, the determination is based on whether the clitoris is long enough to penetrate (in which case “it’s a boy”) and if not whether there is a vaginal canal deep enough for penetration (in which case “it’s a girl”) and if neither or both are true the child’s body is forcibly surgically altered.

they can't define sex "biologically" because it is not a "biological" reality. it will be determined, as always, punitively, on a case by case basis on varying traits and legal documentation, to enforce patriarchal economic systems that depend on misogyny and transmisogyny.

one of the most telling parts from the executive order, to me, was this (emphasis mine):

"The erasure of sex in language and policy has a corrosive impact not just on women but on the validity of the entire American system. Basing Federal policy on truth is critical to scientific inquiry, public safety, morale, and trust in government itself."

this bit gives the game away with how important the institution and enforcement of sex assignment is to capitalism, the united states economy, the carceral/legal system, and the ideological buy-in to us-american hegemony.

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Bounce

Elliot and Magdalene bounce within three days of each other.

Magdalene bounces first, at the ripe old age of 82, bed-bound and breathing only with the aid of a respirator. The pooling blood in her legs had formed into little coagulated beads, and one finally dislodged and swam the stream to her brain, where it wedged in tight like a pebble caught in the rudder of a boat and flat-lined Magdalene.

The on-call doctors do nothing but watch. Magdalene’s heart stops, and her brain waves quiet to nothing, and the wisp of breath vanishes from her throat. The flat keen of her monitors confirms she is entirely, unmistakably dead. The nurse assigned to her sits at Magdalene’s bedside, idle and distracted, fingers fiddling her pager, hovering, waiting.

It takes 20 minutes for Magdalene’s vitals to stir again. A single staccato blip breathes back into her heart rate monitor. A second blip follows. And a third. Her heart rate stabilizes. Her blood oxygenation spikes. Her monitors flicker back to life. The bedside nurse removes the breathing tube from her throat and marks Magdalene’s chart as “bounced”.

Elliot bounces 3 days later - from the blunt force trauma of falling down the hospital stairs. He claims he fell while trying to visit Magdalene one floor below. He also claims to have forgotten about the elevator. The doctors all suspect he intentionally bounced himself, but it’s not worth fussing over. Ethical bouncing is common enough. And for the sake of joining his wife, his bounced age is close enough. Elliot isn’t even hospitalized. His bouncing is perfectly clean.

For the next 4 months, Elliot visits every day to wheel Magdalene around the hospital garden. She is able to leave her bed now, but she is still immobile, her hips too worn to support her weight. So Elliot pushes the wheelchair, and they talk and talk about hopeful nothings, two octogenarians moving in frail, stuttering, slow circuits around the garden pond. They have a lot of plans to make, and a lot of time to pass, and a lot of bad jokes to tell. Elliot likes to flex his trembling arms and say he’s spry again, like a 60 year old, and he can feel it. Magdalene doesn’t tire of the joke. She laughs every time.

Keep reading

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[ID: "#we've seen websites die a noble death (vine) #fade peacefully into obscurity (myspace) #live long enough to see themself become the villain (many such cases) #or march on with inexplicable plot armor (tumblr) #but now #finally #we get to see a website Come Back Wrong". end ID]

Please tell me that y'all won't go back to tiktok once Trump gets whatever nefarious concessions he wants from the company and "saves" it. Like, you all NEED to stay gone. Stay on Xiaohongshu or move to other platforms or create a new one or whatever, but don't go back to whatever Trump-appeasement monstrosity TikTok is about to become. Don't do it.

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yk how hard it is for me to not correct misinformation on posts about sports on this website full of people who don't watch sports

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The Schlurper strikes again.

(Pardon the band-aid.on my finger, it isn't for gross reasons, I just needed to protect a bruise.)

(it does make this look extra nasty though. I'm sorry.)

ID: (A handsome young seal-point cat awkwardly chews and sucks on a human's fingers in the grossest possible way, mouth open, tongue flopping, face blank; it's revolting but somehow really cute. Audio is faint video game combat sounds, frustrated sighs or murmurs, and faint slurping sounds from the disgusting cat.)

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A lot of the gifs people are sharing about the little boy Elon going all sieg heil misses the second half: Just after doing his best Mussolini impression towards the audience, he turns and do the same salute towards the flag. He can't be clearer than that.

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[ID: "#And oil and gas is great for birds. They love swimming in oil". end ID]

objectively the funniest moral panic to come from conservatives is "alternative energy is bad because birds might fly into the wind turbines". birds, which notoriously have no other man-made obstacles, such as the window