trying414

[trying414]

Do you have a masterlist for your batfam twitter au posts? I love reading them :3

I don't but I guess I can use this as one? I'm not making them consistently or anything, just when I wake up at 3am with a Vision

Batfam twitter masterpost

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

(Secret part 7.5 I put on a reblog)

Part 8

Part 9

Part 10 to come (possibly)

Request in replies if you want to be added to the taglist for any new Batfam twitter posts

[trying414]

Btw if anyone ever has any headcanons of any DC characters (not just batfam) or just wants to rant abt your faves this is an open invite to send them to my asks I'd love to see them

More batfam twitter shenanigans here

Image descriptions in alt text, taglist under the cut

Taglist: @scarlettauthor @searchingforthelamps @aceisferal @lady-bizarre @nana-mizu-shiki @reality-itself-but-magic @humanoidluv @shortstorylover @luckybyrdrobyn @ginevraxrogers @universal-travel-er @timpendragon @limeskittlesaredecent @illburnyouontheceiling @half-emptyjuicebox @genderlessblomber @i-suc-at-art @somniphobicfox @ultra-stormsaga @procrastinators-folly @folk-ever-lore @marinafanning @tzuyu132132 @sackofsadstuff @notarobot-lastichecked @blankliferain @kking13 @blackholegladiator @formulaonebuff @blackholegladiator @wrongwaykelly @smiling-through-sadness @cygnusdoesthings @lyninabin @justabilingualchileangirl @atlasaurelius @xxrougefangxx @fictional-love21 @kittyplayz1 @bae-graphomaniac @rusty-lake-resident @spawn0fsatan @savetheupholstery @lostsomewhereinthegarden @dead-potato-monster @its-a-dam-blue-brick @elamimax @ja50nt0ddwa5h3r3 (continued in replies due to tag limit)

[trying414]

Orphaned Podcast Part 3 bc why not

Dick: Well, here's the thing, I had no idea who Bruce Wayne was before I got adopted by him.

Jason: Really?

Dick: Yeah, because I wasn't from Gotham and was like, eight. So when I was in the juvenile detention center, everyone started freaking out about how Bruce Wayne was there and flipping his shit.

Jason: And you just thought...

Dick: I just thought that he was a random guy that was going to kill someone.

Jason: *laughs*

Dick: I have never seen Bruce that mad again. I don't know if it was just my little kid brain exaggerating everything, or he was just genuinely the most pissed off he's ever been.

Dick: And then he demands to take ME home.

Jason: Holy shit. You were probably shitting yourself.

Dick: I was way past shitting myself. I was like... shitting other people's pants.

Jason: *laughs harder*

Dick: I fully thought I was going to die.

Jason: *still laughing* I'm so sorry, that's horrible.

(for the record, Bruce was freaking out because they put a grieving kid in juvenile detention centre because the orphanages were full, but they didn't even try to contact foster homes.)

[trying414]

Damian gets de aged to baby age and Bruce is absolutely delighted.

Like, he’s concerned, because he loves his 10 year old Damian. He would be heartbroken if it was permanent, it would be like Damian died.

But as soon as they confirm that it’s all temporary, he’s relieved, but down plays his excitement. A whole week with his (now literal) baby boy.

One of his biggest regrets in life was not being able to see Damian as a baby. It’s different with his other kids because they had parents and he repeated that he could never replace them. Damian on the other hand, he should’ve been there. He would’ve been, had he’d known. So he really feels like he missed out on that aspect.

When Dick insists that he holds and plays with Damian, he gets all pouty and quiet. Because how ridiculous is it to be jealous over a babies attention. Until he notices Damian keeps looking back at Bruce, as if making sure he’s still there. And he realizes that Damian, even though he’s happily playing with Dick, wants him around. And he’s so proud of himself. He’s getting a good grade in Dad.

It’s all fun and games until it’s time for bedtime and turns out, Damian is a clingy baby. Bruce basically has to sleep with one hand in the crib for Damian to hold for him to even consider sleeping.

[trying414]

More of that Orphaned podcast au lol

Dick: *after playfully bickering with Bruce and Jason about how he was adopted after Jay* Not to get too deep, but when did you consider me as a son? 

Bruce: Well… it certainly wasn’t as fast as Jason, but that’s only because I more open to being a father- or having a kid, more so. Because, when I took you in *referring to Dick* I was only aware of the conventional sense of a father-son relationship. As in, you considered me a father and I consider you a son, and in doing so I would replace your biological father. That’s obviously not the case, but that was my understanding.

But I think it was… maybe a month or so you’ve been in the manor. You were having these awful nightmares, you weren’t sleeping at all. But one night you wake me up and you’re in tears. And I had no idea what to do. But you just looked so small and scared, so I just picked you up and hugged you.

And you just broke down more. I thought I messed up, but you were holding onto me like a lifeline. And then, whether I accepted it then or not, that’s the moment that I considered you my son. And I would do anything to protect you going forward.

Jason: For those who are just listening, Dick is fighting back tears right now.

Dick, his voice wet: It’s a fucking emotional story, okay? I see you eye’s welling up too!

Jason: BULLSHIT THESE ARE MY ALLERGIES ASSNIP!

Should I do more of these?

[trying414]

I think it would be fun if Dick and Jason had a podcast called Orphaned or something. Same vibes as The Basement Yard, but with more guests. Mostly their family. Tim is the most frequent, followed by Steph, then Bruce.

I like them bickering and being brothers on camera. And Bruce is there surprisingly often just cause he likes to see and talk to his boys. Dick and Jay both joke that they only have him on to rake in the views, but genuinely like the talks they have. It even translates into off camera stuff because Bruce realizes how easy it is to talk about mundane stuff and not about cases.

One scene I can’t get out of my head is them reminiscing about the first time they met.

Dick: ugh, you pissed me off so much…

Jason: wha- How?? I was literally eight! What did I do??

Dick: You just waltzed right in and got adopted while I was still just a fucking ward!!

Jason: How is that my fault?? I didn’t force Bruce to adopt me!

Dick: I know that now! It just pissed me off at the time, I was still just a teenager!

Jason: You’re adopted now though, right.

Dick: Yeah… but sometimes I wish I wasn’t

Jason: Why? Because this family is fucking bonkers?

Dick: No because I could hold that over Bruce’s head for so long.

Jason: Oh yeah, you could milk that.

Dick: I’d milk it so hard.

[trying414]

Duke, filming a TikTok walking through the halls of Wayne Manor: “I’ve never understood why people want to know what it’s like living with the Wayne’s.”

He walks past a dark, candle lit room. Dick, Tim, Steph, Cass, and Damian all stand in a circle around Jason. They hold hands and rhythmically chant out the words to Smashmouth’s “All Stars.”

Duke: “Like, they’re just regular people doing regular people things. They aren’t aliens, you know?”

Duke cracks at the last second, laughing at their skit.

[trying414]

Jason‘s bike breaks on the way to a mission, and he doesn‘t have time to repair it, so he takes the bus.

He enters, passes the petrified driver the money and gets met with several sleep deprived gothamites staring at him. He‘s still wearing the helmet, his weapons are out. He‘s covered in grease and dirt and looks like he just crawled out of his grave (again).

Someone slowly, slowly takes their camera out and snaps a picture. It’s on the front page of the newspaper the next morning.

[trying414]

While Damian’s twitter is serious and used to present himself to the public, his insta account is filled with Alfred the cat, Batcow and other animals he sees on patrol.

Some of those animals are (supposedly) extinct. Whenever interviewers ask about it, his responses don’t clarify anything.

“Damian, you recently posted a picture of you with a Tasmanian Tiger, a species that went extinct 88 years ago. How did you find one, when researches have been searching for years?”

“They should have looked closer.”

[trying414]

Dick: “Hey, Jason—Where did all this money come from?”

Jason: “From B.”

Dick: “He gave it to you? For what? Did you blackmail him?”

Jason: “No, he paid me, in exchange for very important pictures.”

Dick: “Oh, you got evidence for the case?”

Jason: “No, Damian’s baby pictures.”

Dick: “…How much?”

[trying414]

During Jason’s crime lord era

Dick: “I’ve pinpointed all the locations where Jason was sighted. Maybe there’s a pattern and we can see where he’ll turn up next.”

Bruce, staring at the map, very clearly spelling “fuck you”: “…There certainly is a pattern.”

[trying414]

Jason has a life-sized cardboard cutout of Bruce Wayne in his apartment, and he argues with it a hell of a lot. When Dick dropped by one day and saw it, Jason convinced him of how cathartic it was. Dick brushed him off, telling him to find healthier coping mechanisms, only to go out and get one of his own.

[trying414]

Headcanon that Bruce venmos Jason $100 whenever he is feeling guilty about his death, like the emotionally reserved billionaire he is, however Jason genuinely has no idea why Bruce does this and it confuses him every time. It happens about once or twice a month and Jason's theories include Bruce thinks he needs the money (which is kind of annoying but okay), Bruce does it when he wants Jason to talk to him (confusing since sometimes it will be after a particularly bad argument where Bruce told him to get out of Gotham), or compensation for missions (which is offensive since $100 is kind of insulting). Either way, while it drives Jason absolutely insane, $100 is $100.

[trying414]

A collection of ones I didn't really feel were post-worthy but have them anyway

More batfam twitter shenanigans here

Taglist under the cut

@scarlettauthor @searchingforthelamps @aceisferal @lady-bizarre @nana-mizu-shiki @reality-itself-but-magic @humanoidluv @shortstorylover @luckybyrdrobyn @ginevraxrogers @universal-travel-er @timpendragon @limeskittlesaredecent @illburnyouontheceiling @half-emptyjuicebox @genderlessblomber @i-suc-at-art @somniphobicfox @ultra-stormsaga @procrastinators-folly @folk-ever-lore @marinafanning @tzuyu132132 @sackofsadstuff @notarobot-lastichecked @blankliferain @kking13 @blackholegladiator @formulaonebuff @blackstar-gazer @wrongwaykelly @smiling-through-sadness @cygnusdoesthings @lyninabin @justabilingualchileangirl @atlasaurelius @xxrougefangxx @fictional-love21 @kittyplayz1 @bae-graphomaniac @rusty-lake-resident @spawn0fsatan @savetheupholstery @lostsomewhereinthegarden @dead-potato-monster @its-a-dam-blue-brick @elamimax @ja50nt0ddwa5h3r3 (continued in replies due to tag limit)

If you want to be added to/removed from the taglist let me know in the replies (easier to sort through than reblogs)

[trying414]

[trying414]

I can finally format replies properly :D

More batfam twitter shennanigans here

Taglist under the cut

@scarlettauthor @searchingforthelamps @aceisferal @lady-bizarre @nana-mizu-shiki @reality-itself-but-magic @humanoidluv @shortstorylover @luckybyrdrobyn @ginevraxrogers @universal-travel-er @timpendragon @limeskittlesaredecent @illburnyouontheceiling @half-emptyjuicebox @genderlessblomber @i-suc-at-art @somniphobicfox @ultra-stormsaga @procrastinators-folly @folk-ever-lore @marinafanning @tzuyu132132 @sackofsadstuff @notarobot-lastichecked @blankliferain @kking13 @blackholegladiator @formulaonebuff @blackstar-gazer @wrongwaykelly @smiling-through-sadness @cygnusdoesthings @lyninabin @justabilingualchileangirl @atlasaurelius @xxrougefangxx @fictional-love21 @kittyplayz1 @bae-graphomaniac @rusty-lake-resident @spawn0fsatan @savetheupholstery @lostsomewhereinthegarden @dead-potato-monster @its-a-dam-blue-brick @elamimax @ja50nt0ddwa5h3r3 (continued in replies due to tag limit)

If you want to be added to or removed from the taglist let me know in the replies (easier to sort through than reblogs). I won't respond to each request but you will be added

[trying414]

Jason isn't verified because he refuses to become officially alive again

The third post here is a follow up to this one

More batfam twitter shennanigans here

Taglist under the cut

@scarlettauthor @searchingforthelamps @aceisferal @lady-bizarre @nana-mizu-shiki @reality-itself-but-magic @humanoidluv @shortstorylover @luckybyrdrobyn @ginevraxrogers @universal-travel-er @timpendragon @limeskittlesaredecent @illburnyouontheceiling @half-emptyjuicebox @genderlessblomber @i-suc-at-art @somniphobicfox @ultra-stormsaga @procrastinators-folly @folk-ever-lore @marinafanning @sadbookworm13 @tzuyu132132 @sackofsadstuff @slythieamour-loves-her-guardian @notarobot-lastichecked @blankliferain @kking13 @blackholegladiator @formulaonebuff @blackstar-gazer @wrongwaykelly @smiling-through-sadness @cygnusdoesthings @lyninabin @justabilingualchileangirl @atlasaurelius @xxrougefangxx @fictional-love21 @kittyplayz1 @bae-graphomaniac @rusty-lake-resident @spawn0fsatan @savetheupholstery @lostsomewhereinthegarden @dead-potato-monster @its-a-dam-blue-brick @elamimax @ja50nt0ddwa5h3r3

Tag list continued in replies due to post limit

Request in the replies to be added to/removed from the tag list. No longer replying to each individual request due to the sheer amount of you but you will he added