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I’m guessing this is from a gag reel or something, but it still makes me laugh we live in a reality where these words were actually said.

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Me: Okay, Muse, let's do this. Let's plot out Season 3! Muse: *writing furiously* Kay. Me: Remember, we're going for less verbose than Season 2. Muse: *still writing furiously* Uh-huh Me: ....It...it shouldn't be too hard. There's, like, half as many episodes in Season 3. Muse: *sixteen pages in and growing* Totally. Way fewer episodes to cover. Me: ....Right. Glad we're on, uh, the same page. So...wanna show me what you got? Muse: Ta-Daaaaa! Me: ............................................. Muse: The black stuff is repeat episodes. See? Way fewer! Me: ....and the green? Muse: Oh, that's all the NEW stuff we gotta fit in! Me: ......................................................................I'm going to bed now. Muse: Was it something I said?

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Update: 05/29/24

Sorry for the two week radio silence and disappearance! Turns out the Muse definitely thinks we've done the season finale and it's time for a well-deserved vacation 🤦. I suppose it's not her fault the show didn't end the season after the climatic death of Sam. Nope, they had to add a whole nother episode (which, as we all know, means no less than three chapters for us 🙄). Unfortunately with the Muse on unapproved leave, I am very, very low on my chapter stockpile. To add insult to injury (cuz why not, alliteration is such fun!) I had a medication mixup which has since been solved but holy crap am I still feeling side effects (mood related, anxiety-riddled, Muse-murdering side effects 😭). So it may be a minute before I can update again. We'll get back to it soon 🤞 Thanks for hanging in there with me!

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Verbose AF 🙄

When you're doing a random re-read and spot this gem 🤦‍♀️

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Post Tonight

I didn't get the chapter up last night - I'm up north for a family holiday party this weekend - but I should have time to finish my edit and get it up this evening (most likely at an airport 😂).

Apologies for the second delay!

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Post This Weekend

Son of a bitch, guys! I was supposed to post this weekend 🤦. I'm going to blame Thanksgiving weekend for this one (even though I was home without company and had no actual activities that would keep me from posting 😅 but no, yeah, let's blame the holidays weekend for this one)

I will get the chapter up this upcoming Sunday!

Cheers,

Silence

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GUYS GUYS GUYS. Lyeundu made fanart of the boys in Gabriel's first game XD THey look great!! Sam is so beautifully feminine, I love it so much, LOL Dean would have a blast making fun of our poor boy. This is phenomonal, thank you for sharing, Lyeundu! :D :D :D

Post Coming Soon!

I owe you all a post this weekend, and while it is behind schedule (I usually post Sat night), it will be up tonight. I am in Las Vegas for a whirlwind birthday weekend, but heading home today. I will get the chapter up tonight, once I get home and have a moment to edit and organize 😊

Cheers,

Silence

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Anna Milton

I'm watching the Anna episode, and I've got so many thoughts for this one. My first watch through, I struggled to like Anna after she remembered she was an angel. In part because she becomes a lot more stoic - she became who she used to be, and the human version of her seemed to just be...gone. I think Anna would have been way more interesting as a mix of human with a lifetime of angelic memory. And she gets a little more like that while she's talking to Dean on that car trunk in the Yard. But there's still too little of that human she used to be left in her personality for me. It made that whole sex scene between her and Dean feel...empty? Anna had so little personality once she became an angel, and approached Dean with the same lack of personality, so it didn't feel...erm...passionate. Let's call it that. As someone who identifies as ACE and also thinks there is way too much sex-for-sex's-sake in our media/entertainment, it bothered me on my first watch through. It bothered me less with time, but it always seemed out of place. (OMG, also, can we PLEASE talk about how she puts her hand over Cas's handprint? Like?!!? SHE WOULD KNOW WHAT THAT WAS. That made the whole thing seem very...hmm...like a pointed message to her former suboridnate 🤣) ((As does the kiss she gives Dean, which the show very purposefully cut to Cas's reaction for. Like. You don't cut to another guy's face mid-kiss for no reason.)) (((Personally, I think it was a way to start showing Castiel's...weakness for humanity. Not necessarily romantically, but for sure in curiosity. It fits too when later everyone shuts their eyes when Anna gets her grace back expect Cas. He's staring at her with such open curiosity and awe. I'm pretty sure it took way fewer episodes for me to fall in love with Cas, but this one cemented it))) Anyhoo, back to Anna! I struggled with her more and more every episode she was in because she just went more and more stoic-angel. And what a bummer! She had soooo much potential to be a cool, involved character. I never understood why they didn't use her more. Second thought - Part of me wants to have gone further into why Anna chose to fell, especially with the possible rising tension in the upper ranks of Heaven with the Apocalypse coming. It seemed like a perfect opportunity to lay groundwork for Heaven being the bad guy. Anna either found out more than she wanted to know or just got a sense Heaven wasn't what it was supposed to be. They show could have sprinkled a bit of that in and made Anna more of a key player in being on the humans' side when the time came. Third part! Oh My God. Why was Dean sooo damn interested in her after he found out she was an angel. He was a bit flirty when she was human, but guys, it like...tripples once she reveals she's an angel. He does the whole half-smirk, green-doe-eyed smile around her allllll the time. Guys. Dean is so hot for angels, and the second one came along with them female looks, he was ON THAT 👀 Aaaaaangel kiiiiiiiiiiink. That's our boy!

Lastly, can we talk about Alistair knowing how to exorcise Cas? I don't fully know why that hit me in the good-storytelling bits, but oh boy did it. And I love that Dean saves him from it. You could argue it's kinda just nature for Dean in a fight, but that was Alistair he was taking on. The whole point of that battle was to let the angels and demons fight each other (and get out of the way), and he couldn't let Alistair "kill" Cas. I love how early on that friendship was being written. They could have had it be Sam or Dean or Anna who got Alistair off Cas, but nope! They picked Dean 😁 Anyhoo, that's my ramble for tonight! I'm supposed to be writing (I haven't written anything in two weeks 😭) but since I'm stuck on the damn Morton House (seriously - have I ever told you guys I don't like writing Sam when he's away from Dean? THEY are supposed to be the co-dependent ones, dammit 🙄) I thought hey, I'll post here! At least I'm keeping those writing/Supernatural/fangirl vibes flowing. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ So! Help me get some planning gears in motion. What do you all want to see out of Anna in TRSF? I have one idea at the moment, but I don't know if I'll go that way, as it conveniently takes Anna out of the story. And I juuust ranted about how much I did not like the show for doing that🤦‍♀️ She'd get to live happily as a human at least! But the more I think about it, the more I know she has potential as a character. I also know that the Muse and I have a habit of shying away from the women on the show Dean gets busy with. A small part of me thinks "NO, he's for Cas, back off ladies!", but that's me fangirling and I know that. A bigger part of me doesn't want to write him getting intimate with other characters (although for some reason, Cassie and Lisa don't trigger this at all - just Bela and Anna). The largest part yet is actually just angry and holding a grudge against the show writers for the amount of queer-baiting we got followed by under-developed and sometimes forced-on-us relationships, particularly with Dean.

Hmm, that's probably why Cassie and Lisa don't trigger this issue. Those relationships well developed and had purpose/fullfillment in them. Plus, the characters were well written and had depth! But Anna's relationship with Dean felt especially forced. And so my default planning definitely went towards avoiding her. Heeey, look at me writing out my thought process until I reached an understanding! Now I know why I want to avoid Anna, which means it's time to get the Muse working on the exact opposite 🤣 And that ramble got away from me. Go back to telling me what you all want to see from an Anna story arc in TRSF! Please and Thank you in Advance for all ideas and inspiration! 😁

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Post Coming Soon!

I owe you all a post this weekend, and while it is behind schedule (I usually post Sat night), it will be up tonight. I am in Las Vegas for a whirlwind birthday weekend, but heading home today. I will get the chapter up tonight, once I get home and have a moment to edit and organize 😊

Cheers,

Silence

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I just wanted to say that your fic is really impressive. It's probably the longest I've ever read, and not many people would be able to write over 800,000 words and still maintain a coherent plot with character development and new ideas every chapter. Thank you for deciding to write it, and for not giving up!!

Thanks so much, Iwannarunawayandbeapirate! (side note: badass username 😉)

I'm really glad you have enjoyed the story, despite the ridiculous length. And, omg, we're not even half way through 🤦 We're getting close to halfway, I think, but to be honest I haven't done a lot of planning for season 4 and 5, so who knows how long they'll be (please don't be as long as season 2. Please, pleeeeeeeease).

There's no point in fine-tuning the plans for those seasons yet - whatever I write that goes off-map from the blueprints (and it always goes off-map. Thank you, Miss Muse!) would very likely end up clashing with any planning this far out. When that happens, I have to juggle both where the writing ended up and where I wanted it to be, which actually makes my job so much harder than just letting the writing go where it wants in the first place.

So I've only got the big details planned for seasons 4 and 5 (and yes, you can go ahead and insert maniacle cackling here). Who knows, maybe by then I will somehow, miraculously, stop being so verbose 😅

Kiiiinda doubt it though.

I don't 100% know what has kept me going through such a long fic, other than the fact that I know I have some really cool ideas, and I want to share them with people I know will love them as much as I do! So really, the story has only made it this far because readers have been interested in my ideas!

When I first got going, I thought there was a good chance my interest and motivation would trail off before the end of season one. When I made it to season two, I was surprised, but also realized I was unlikely to lose interest at that point. We've started getting into the really good stuff; the stuff I want to share soooo badly, and that'll keep me going. Plus, omg, this story has such an amazing following - way beyond anything I expected. And that has helped more than anything. No way I can leave everyone hanging now! Now when there's soooo much good stuff planned! 😊

Anyhoo, this answer got away from me (surprise surprise 🙄) Thank you so much for reaching out. It means the world to me, as does the acknowledgement that this beast of a story hasn't been easy! But I am so, so happy to be able to share it with you ❤️

Cheers,

Silence

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Procrastinating in the Best Ways

So I've spent the last couple days house-sitting for my mother, who lives in Albuquerque, New Mexico. For the most part, I've done nothing but lounge around the house, play with the dogs, get covered in cat hair, indulge in at least one too many Old Fashions, and attempt to write.

Sadly, the writing has not been particularly abundant, though it has been forward-moving, at least. I've got the rest of the Battle Royale so thoroughly planned out, all I have to do is write it. But every time I put my hands on the keybard, the muse pulls them off again. Muse: What if we just...thought some more

Me: No, we need to WRITE. We're done thinking! There's nothing left to think about. *puts hands back on*

Muse: Pfft, there is always more to think about. *slides hands back off* Like Bela. Let's talk about Bela-

Me: No, we're talking about Sam, and Andy, and the battle royale. *puts hands back on* NOW WRITE, BITCH.

Muse: ...how about a nice walk in the bosque? Me: We are not going for a walk in the damn bosque! We are WRITING.

Muse: ...we can stop at your favorite brewery on the way home. Me: ..........God damnit. Enjoy a photo of the Bosque, everyone. (The bosque, for anyone not familiar with Albuquerque, is spanish for "Forest" or "Woods" and surrounds the Rio Grande. It's fucking gorgeous this time of year.)

In conclusion, the Muse is a manipulative beyotch, y'all. We did absolutely stop at my favorite brewery on the way home and I wrote this post while there just so I could complain about her. And take some time to reply to reviews.

...And maybe brag about how beautiful Albuquerque is 😜

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WE ARE BACK!!!

Postings resume tonight! And I have many, many fingers crossed that we'll keep those posts regular. I've got a stockpile of chapters finally. I'm a couple shy of my original goal, unfortunately, but I think it's time to resume anyway. In part becasue I'm too impatient to wait (I neeeeeeeeed to share Gabriel's evil, evil ways with you!) and in part knowing that getting back in touch with readers will spur the Muse.

She's been fiesty lately. See, the Battle Royale was never my favorite episode. Totally necessary, huge part of the plot, etc, but just never my favorite. Battle Royal stories have never been my favorite, actually. Turns out, despite my love of action, pew-pew guns and explosions (you know, generalized violence), I have a much harder time with groups forced to kill each other off. Especially innocent people. So yeah, we hit the battle royale and the Muse kinda yawned and wandered off 🙄. Which means it's time to spart posting, despite my fears she's gonna stay wandered off. Because nothing brings her back faster than fans. She's an attention whore, is what she is. (Yes, her. Definitely her, not both of us, or anything. Nope, no, that's totally all her)

SO WE'RE BACK!! Let the party begin!

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S5.E4 "The End" Musings

Okay, okay, I thought of something to discuss! I've got the boys playing on my TV as I (attempt to) write and it's the 2014 Croatoan episode. This is one of my favorite episodes. But I have thoughts! And questions! So why not share them :)

It's never clarified in the show, but I always assumed that Zachariah didn't throw Dean into the future so much as...craft one that served his purposes. My reasoning!

Chuck: Chuck as God ditched once the apocalypse was averted in the OG timeline (end of Season 5). I don't think he'd stick around in the Croatoan verse. Zachariah obviously didn't know Chuck was God, which is why I think he threw him in. (side note: this could also be because the writer's hadn't decided Chuck was god yet, but since we're going with canon, it is what it is :D)

Future Dean's Behavior: It's not out of character for Dean to be cold, hardened, and angry. It worked so well for this episode. But the fact that like, the second thing out of his mouth is "Say yes to Michael" just had a liiiittle too much of Zachariah's influence. It was very convenient, serving the angel's purpose. Perhaps too convenient. Not to say that Dean didn't go through a lot. Oh boy, he did. But I always felt even a broken Dean would have had a couple things for 2009!Dean to do, and saying yes to Michael wouldn't have been the first (and only) one.

Multiverse: the show never clarifies how time travel works, so it's hard to say if Croatoan 2014 was an offshoot of the timeline. A possibile future, but not the only one. I like this theory more than there being one fixed future. Which is why I think Zachariah either rooted around for the perfect one (he's kinda too lazy for that...), or picked one close enough and made some tweaks.

Angelic Pocket Dimensions: The show did make pocket dimensions as an angelic power canon (at least archangels). Zachariah may have the ability, or may have asked Michael to craft what he needed (I'm not entirely sure it's Michael's style, so this may be a little wiffle-waffly)

Dean Suspects its a trick: Dean even asks Zachariah if this is a trick, and that douche only says "the time for tricks is over". Convenient, now that your last trick is over :D It's just too fitting for Zach's normal tactics for it not to be at least somewhat of a manipulation.

Anyhoo, nothing particularly solid, just my thoughts as I watched through it over the years. It actually took all those years before it even occured to me that it wasn't just a manipulation, and it could have been meant to be a real future. Why is this important? Omg, it's totally not XD Just the musings of a writer who may, or may not, be including this episode in TRSF (which means I may, or may not, need to define the guidelines of throwing a human into the future and/or crafting one around him). But I'm curious what other fans' take on this episode was! Do you think it was a legitmate future, untouched by Zachariah? Or a full pocket dimension instead? Something in between? Gimme your thoughts on how this one worked! And any other musings. I may or may not need the inspiration in the future XD (The way, waaaay future. Oh god, Season 5? We have soooo far to go. But let's just pretend we don't for the sake of some fun conversation :D)

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Day 1 - And we're stuck already!

Okay! Day 1 (I actually think it's day 3...I might have forgotten I was supposed to be posting on here regularly XD) of blogging while I try writing.

This is a great day for it, because I was all geared up for some writing, pulled up my word document, aaaaaaand nothing. I've been doing SO WELL lately, guys! I'm 6 chapters in to my 10 chapter goal! How amazing is that?!? I have been a writing CHAMP!

Until tonight. Really, this is all Loki's fault. No, not our favorite Trickster-turned-Archangel. Although he did give me so much trouble for months. But I finally broke through that a couple weeks ago, started churning out chapters. This, tonight, is all another Loki's fault. Because I decided I needed to rewatch Marvel's Loki before the next season comes out. So this is THAT trickster's fault.

Actually, it's not. I wrote pages no problem while watching the first half. It's that I don't want to write Henriksen right now becasue I don't have a plan for this part of his chapter. And apparently the Muse is taking a nap at the moment. When she's wide awake, she'll just write whether I have a plan or not. But apparently I'm on my own at the moment.

Also, my dog keeps kicking me. It's cute, but it's not particularly helpful at the moment. (and that's all I got. Is that...is this how we do this? Man, I have no idea what I'm doing.) ((Oh good, the other dog is now snoring. Loudly. Like a demon.)) (((..........it's kinda cute too. Also not helpful, however.))) Cheers,

Silence

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Here We Go

Alrighty, guys! I'm starting a blog (a brand new experience for me - and boy, do I feel ancient). My goal is to post fairly regularly about my writing progress, provide updates as I go, rants as I stumble and stagger, right myself and keep on going, so on and so forth ;P I also want to provide a space where we can chat! I miss the interaction with other fans that I had when I wrote for previous fandoms (when I was young, hip, and in the know XD) I don't even know where the kids hang out these days. Discord is an enigma to me, but Tumblr I at least soooorta get (emphasis on the sorta) Anyway, I'm rambling about my old ancient bones again (I'm only thirty-three, this is getting sad). I hope you all will follow along if you're interested in behind-the-scenes content of a fanfictioner as she attempts this whole blogging thing (Chuck help us all) and (Chuck willing) works on finishing the beast of a story she started 5 years ago.