trojsun - Tumblr blog

[trojsun]

coming out of the worst meeting of my life (that got extended from 2 hours and to 3) to seeing paperback copies are live... closest thing to a spirtual experience i will ever have

[trojsun]

thinking about making a jeremy backstory murder board... i feel like there's no way there's enough information to figure it out but just sounds fun

[trojsun]

There is a sort of constant battle between the two of them to the degree that they are fighting, but they are taking care of one another. When the sugar goes on the cheek of Patrick, Art takes it off with his hand in a very nice gesture of kindness -- and very intimate, I would say. But at the same time, they are really tense. And I think it’s about being jealous of one another, but at the same time wanting one another.

Challengers (2024) dir. Luca Guadagnino

[trojsun]

mike fa*st is not quite how i picture jeremy... but the blond curls... the scene where he's in the red hat and shirt.....

[trojsun]

nothing i say about jeremy can be trusted until i do a re-read but i don't wanna do a re-read until i get the paperback >:(

[trojsun]

[PRIDE]: after the receiver succeeds in a remarkable achievement, the sender cups their face and tilts their foreheads together to express how proud they are of them. @sordidery

jeremy couldn't deny the truth: if someone had told him that after his college career was over he'd be playing with a fox, he would have wanted it to be kevin. in fairness to him, anyone (who hadn't played with kevin previously) would have also wanted to play with kevin. however, he found himself caught in little moments where he felt immensely glad it was neil. this had turned out to be one of them.

night practices, at first, had seemed unacceptable to jeremy for two reasons. one, he pushed himself to his limit in practices that were mandatory so he could relax outside of it. two, jeremy believed his therapist when she pointed out the importance of boundaries. she likely hadn't meant with exy, but most things that applied to exy applied to life.

jeremy got the sneaking suspicion that neil had never seen a therapist, had unparalleled stamina from playing full-halves, and wanted jeremy dead. perhaps he had ended up on a team with a fox that was a crazy fool.

still, he couldn't lie and say it hadn't strengthened him and neil both individually and together. he couldn't lie and say finally completing a successful maneuver after all this time practicing wasn't some of the most fun he had ever had with their team.

when neil reached forward to tip their foreheads together, jeremy felt it. they were going to make a great team. "you were great out there. if we can keep this up, we might just win this season." he was pretty sure the grin on his face was delirious.

[trojsun]

[CHECK]: after an unexpectedly violent situation, sender frantically rushes to check if the receiver is okay, cupping their face to look closer. @jeanmor3au

jeremy knew what people said about the trojans, and he spent very little time thinking it. it didn't bother him when he stumbled across an article or a sportscast about how the trojans were too soft, he knew what he was. what kind of team he was leading.

but not letting your opponents get the better of you wasn't supposed to mean that they should say whatever they wanted and get away with it. this was twice as true when it came to his teammates.

he had been unwilling to let lucas's comment at the beach slide. he hadn't escalated it, but he wouldn't tolerate it. this time the comment had been far worse, and jeremy hadn't been able to stop himself on calling lucas out on it. he was willing to back away, but he had made the wrong call thinking jean wouldn't be pulled into it.

he had stepped in front of jean pre-emptively, he had meant it to signal that jean was apart of this team now and jeremy would defend him with whatever it took. lucas was already swinging though, so jeremy was the one who took the first hit.

everything narrowed down to the burst of pain. he only allowed himself a moment with it before he forced his hearing to come back and confirmed that one of the coaches was dealing with lucas. his hand reached out to touch his face, but jean was faster.

jean. how could jeremy have forgotten about him, when all this violence had occurred, for even a moment?

"jean," he wasn't sure if it was a confirmation or a question. "are you okay?"

[trojsun]

[ FOCUS ]: the sender, noticing the receiver has become distracted during a conversation, places a hand on their shoulder to redirect and focus their attention. @sordidery

it's the first dinner with the trojans jeremy has been able to make in awhile, so he would really prefer if he actually felt like he was here.

something about being back at the dinner table has him feeling like he's back at his family's place. laila and cat's place couldn't be more different than his family's, even at the dinner table. the mugs decorated with silly phrases, the knit coasters by cat's grandma and the paper plates they're eating off of is a contrast from the fine china he's sat in front of the last week. but he still can't help but feel like he never really left the mansion. two weeks of being alone in his room or alone in a group of people will have him thinking like that.

he goes through the motions, drowns out the conversation enough to be listening for his name, waiting to be called on to answer a question where he has to avoid the topics of exy, his relationships, his classes, himself.

his mind runs through the arguments he's gone through in therapy, lap after lap until he feels dizzy. it's just like exy, he tries to tell himself, you practice and then you go on the court and perform. except it's not, because there's no team beside him, behind him or anywhere. he tries to square his shoulders, toughening himself out for it. this must be what signals laila.

he feels her hand on his shoulder, blinks once, slowly. when he opens his eyes he finds his team. he straightens his shoulders without even meaning to.

"sorry," he tries to get it out fast, hoping they can move on. "i kind of zoned out? what were you saying?"

[trojsun]

what if your family was torn apart from something involving the sport you love and they blamed you for it and you hated being called your last name because it reminds you of them and then every time you go to play said sport you're likely forced to think about it when you see their, i mean your, name written across the back

[trojsun]

jeremy's not entirely sure if the choice to move another bed into jean's room was the right one. was he infringing too much on jean's newly found freedom and entangling himself too much with it? was he being too slack, letting jean follow the regime of a team that treated him so completely unlike a person? he struggled to answer that.

but, he decided it didn't matter. he could wonder if he made the right call a hundred times in his head, a feeling he was very familiar with, but it didn't matter what he thought. because jean had asked. had he asked for something that would hurt him in the long run? jeremy struggled to answer that too. but it was jean's decision to make. jeremy had learned that jean had asked for so little in life, and gotten even less, he would just have to put some trust in him.

jean's response to him, while not particularly warm, still had him feeling pleasant. saying "jeremy" still felt like progress in its own right. it was enough to have him feeling unready to let go of this conversation. it didn't look like jean would be sleeping any time soon, if his rigid posture was any indication.

"i might need a pick me up in the morning, then. do you want to come with? what's your preference, coffee, tea or smoothie?" he wondered about the last one in particular, knowing jean was so used to a healthy mean plan. "we do the last one pretty darn well." he offered a proud smile, even knowing jean couldn't possibly see it.

at this point, a part of him knew that the answer would be that jean didn't know, didn't have one. still, jeremy never wanted to be the person who didn't ask, that just assumed. one of these times, he hoped jean would surprise him. until then, he'd just keep offering him the option to.

❛ promise me you'll still be here when i wake up. ❜ / ( @trojsun )

Jean would be lying if he claimed not to have thought about leaving. It happens far less often than it did to begin with; now, when he thinks about it, it's with a strange pang of -- something that he does not recognise, and it's only ever in the abstract. There's none of his previous urgency, his need to return to the Nest. Besides, Riko and the master are gone, the Ravens have fallen apart; there would be nothing to return to.

He wonders if Kevin told Jeremy that he might be a flight risk, or whether Jeremy is simply needy this evening. Having practiced with the team, Jean decides that it makes sense that Jeremy wants to know that his most competent player isn't going anywhere.

So it's an easy, honest truth when he nods. He peers across the dim room to where Jeremy is in his bed and is momentarily struck by the urge to reach across the short distance to touch him. It takes him aback; thus far, he's been careful to maintain his distance from everyone on the team - contact on the court notwithstanding.

Jean folds his hands in his lap and sits back against his headboard. He doesn't think he'll sleep very much tonight.

"I am not going anywhere," he responds, none of the fondness in his thoughts reflected in his cool tone. "Go to sleep, Jeremy. I will not deal with you if you are grumpy in the morning."

[trojsun]

jean: if you must speak to me, please do not speak in gibberish. the sun has clearly addled your brain-

[trojsun]

THE SHOULDER TOUCH. ( A PROMPT LIST! )

i said i'd make them! i hope you enjoy these, and as always: DO NOT ADD, EDIT OR CLAIM THIS LIST AS YOUR OWN!

[ WAKEN ]: the sender touches the receiver's shoulder to waken them from a nap or sleep.

[ STILL ]: the sender places their hands on the visibly angry/upset receiver to try and restrain them.

[ STAY ]: the sender, noticing the receiver attempting to escape a meeting or a conversation, quietly rests a hand on their shoulder and pulls them back into their seat.

[ REST ]: the sender places a gentle but firm hand on a weakened/sick/injured receiver's shoulder to push them back into their bed to rest more.

[ PUNCH ]: the sender places a hand on the receiver to draw their attention away from another focus, and once they've turned around, the sender swings a punch at them in the moment of confusion.

[ PRIDE ]: the sender, having heard or seen the receiver successfully achieve a remarkable feat, places a hand on their shoulder to express their wordless pride in them.

[ HUG ]: the sender places their hands on the receiver's shoulders to yank them into a hug.

[ COMFORT ]: the sender, noticing a visibly upset receiver, solemnly moves to their side, and places a hand on their shoulder in an effort to comfort them.

[ SURPRISE ]: the sender, noticing an otherwise occupied receiver, moves forward silently and suddenly grabs their shoulder to startle them.

[ STUN ]: the sender, having been apart from the receiver for some time, makes an unexpected return and greets the unaware receiver with a hand on their shoulder.

[ TIDY ]: the sender reaches forward and lightly sweeps something from the receiver's shoulder.

[ WORRY ]: the sender grabs the receiver by the shoulders to take a good look at them for any sign of harm or injury.

[ ARM ]: the sender rests a hand on the receiver's shoulder, their arm draped around them in order to do so.

[ FOCUS ]: the sender, noticing the receiver has become distracted during a conversation, places a hand on their shoulder to redirect and focus their attention.

[ GOTCHA ]: the sender, noticing the receiver has unknowingly walked into the path of a source of danger, grabs them by the shoulder and hoists them back to safety.

[ PRAISE ]: the sender, having heard that the receiver has achieved great success in a task or accomplishment, gives them a proud pat and squeeze of the shoulder to convey their congratulations.

[ STEADY ]: the sender rests a hand on the shaken and panicked receiver's shoulder to steady and ground them.

[ CAUGHT ]: the sender plants a hand on the receiver's shoulder to stop them from fleeing a potential arrest or accusation.

[ DELIVER ]: the sender, about to deliver some bad news to the receiver, gently places a hand on the receiver's shoulder to stop them from running away from the bad news.

[ SHIELD ]: the sender catches hold of the receiver's shoulder and draws them back and away from a threat, pulling them behind them for their safety.

[ SOOTHE ]: the sender places their hands on the receiver's shoulders and begins to give them a massage.

[ LEVER ]: the sender, wanting to sit next to the receiver, places a hand on their shoulder to ease themselves to the space beside them.

[ HERE ]: the sender taps the receiver's shoulder to alert them to their presence.

[trojsun]

// call me jeremy knox because i'm also avoiding his backstory

[trojsun]

smoke break :)

[trojsun]

REASONS TO CUP A FACE. ( A PROMPT LIST. )

with the help of some very talented and amazing friends, i present to you an unexpected, very spontaneous meme list based on the beautiful art of cupping someone's face! there's a mix of romantic and platonic here, and even a few that defy the boundaries of normal relationship dynamics! i hope you enjoy! as always; DO NOT ADD TO THIS LIST NOR CLAIM IT AS YOUR OWN!

[KISS]: sender cups the receivers face in their hands before drawing them closer for a kiss.

[CHECK]: after an unexpectedly violent situation, sender frantically rushes to check if the receiver is okay, cupping their face to look closer.

[CLEAN]: sender affectionately wipes a smudge of sauce from the corner of the receiver's mouth, cupping their face in the process.

[LIFT]: sender gently cups the receiver's face and lifts their chin so the receiver is looking up at them.

[COMFORT]: sender cups a distressed receiver's face in their hands and steadies them by resting their foreheads together.

[ATTENTION]: during an important conversation, the sender takes the receiver's face in their hands and firmly directs their focus on them.

[MAKE-UP]: while applying make-up on the receiver's face, the sender cups their face in order to keep them still.

[PRIDE]: after the receiver succeeds in a remarkable achievement, the sender cups their face and tilts their foreheads together to express how proud they are of them.

[WHISPER]: in order to have a private, hushed conversation with the receiver, the sender cups their face and draws them close to make sure they can be heard.

[HAIR]: in the process of pushing the receiver's hair back from their face, the sender lets their hand rest against the receiver's cheek a moment longer.

[GROUND]: during a moment of intense emotional stress, the sender gently takes the receiver's face in their hands to ground them until they're calmer again.

[WONDER]: unable to comprehend how incredible the receiver is, the sender decides to simply cup their face in their hands and marvel at them instead.

[LAST LOOK]: before going into a situation that may result in their death, the sender takes a moment to cup the unaware receiver's face in their hand, just to take a final look of admiration at them before they go.

[SACRIFICE]: the sender cups the receiver's face tenderly to distract them, right before shoving them out of the way (to safety) and facing an attack alone in order to buy the receiver enough time to escape.

[BELIEF]: in a moment where the receiver is lacking in self-confidence, the sender cups their face tenderly and professes their faith in the receiver's abilities.

[DISBELIEF]: after the receiver has done something completely unexpected (and reckless) the stunned sender cups their face in their hands while trying to get them to explain why the hell they did it.

[BETRAYAL]: trying to keep the receiver calm before the big reveal, the sender cups their face gently to keep them steady, and then reveals that they're the villain.

[WOUND]: after the receiver has been wounded, the sender tries to keep them calm and conscious by cupping their face in their hands and talking to them to keep them focused.

[INJURY]: after having been badly wounded themselves, the sender tries to reassure the frantic receiver by cupping their face and comforting them.

[RAMSAY]: after the receiver commits a culinary crime, the sender presses two slices of bread against either side of their face, cupping their face to hold the bread in place, and calls them an idiot sandwich.

[trojsun]

// going to be so dramatic about jeremy's family until we know what really happened.

[trojsun]

What is a home if not the first place you learn to run from?

Richard kadrey // Clementine von Radics // Taylor Swift // Alice (1988) // Amanda Lovelace // sue zhao // ? // Édouard Levé //Emily Berry // ?