treeseat - Tumblr blog

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last reblog reminds me i saw hurray for the riff raff in concert last month and the lines the crowd woo'd at included "meet me back in a san francisco bookstore / down the stairs in the poetry aisle," and "not quite a woman or a man," and i was like: my ppl

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General question to reblog and tell me in the tags;

You go into a used bookstore - what are the two sections you head to first?

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“What if we shift the question from ‘who do I want to be?’ to the question, ‘what kind of life do I want to live with others?’? It seems to me that then many of the questions you pose about happiness, but perhaps also about ‘the good life’ – very ancient yet urgent philosophical questions – take shape in a new way. If the I who wants this name or seeks to live a certain kind of life is bound up with a ‘you’ and a ‘they’ then we are already involved in a social struggle when we ask how best any of us are to live.”

— Judith Butler interviewed by Sara Ahmed (via lazz)

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it's been 4 years since i've logged in here and coming back to see that familiar usernames are around is making me. very nearly verklempt?

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aragorn, practicing his elvish: hey what’s up?

legolas: ??????

aragorn, adjusting his dialect: oh sorry.. howdy how yall doin today

legolas: OH howdy!! :) what’s truckin partner

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from now on all my cooking will be evil

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Among Women

What women wander? Not many. All. A few. Most would, now & then, & no wonder. Some, and I’m one, Wander sitting still. My small grandmother Bought from every peddler Less for the ribbons and lace Than for their scent Of sleep where you will, Walk out when you want, choose Your bread and your company. She warned me, “Have nothing to lose.” She looked fragile but had High blood, runner’s ankles, Could endure, endure. She loved her rooted garden, her Grand children, her once Wild once young man. Women wander As best they can.

MARIE PONSOT

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thinking a lot about how my sun and venus are in gemini and how i’m driven to Relate (with more people than I -think- I want to but mainly with a very small group of people), relate & relay myself to loved ones & hear from them, in order to feel loved and feel real

thinking about this in leo season (moon sign), when I have “kiss me” by sixpence running through my head all day, have been listening to big dyke energy podcast (so wow) and feeling things and being in a dead zone right now having no where to bring all of it, have been crying a lot, getting messages from people on dating apps i’m not using

also feeling things about my (in)ability to relate & having so much air in my chart and how I don’t always look down at the watery stuff that I sense below me at all times but don’t always confront until it’s rising up taking over the sky

thinking about how my exalted or wwwwhatever self is actually just playful in all the ways & can plumb the depths without getting scared

but not rn btch!! right now we’re tryin to not cry long enough to get this thesis done

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im bi, paypal me $200 usd 

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portraits of a person who had an almond latte, bought jean shorts and a set of screwdrivers, assembled a fan, and ate some hummus and snap peas

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You learn, as you grow up, not just that some of these teachers and writers were bad people, but that the things they valued in writing, the very things that taught you how to write, were products of that badness. You might be tempted to hold onto this love, these writers, or these teachers. But since you no longer find yourself in a position to accept what’s been given, you instead decide to change, and you quit resembling the person who could be happy to learn from them. This means that, suddenly, you are less of a prick! You read more widely, and you feel pity, rather than admiration, for people who believe their work is radical, and you care more about whether these poets are decent than whether they are good craftsmen or provocateurs. You realize that it is as stupid to feel guilty for not working on your poems as it is stupid to feel ashamed if they are too focused on the first-person, or too traditional, or too formless, or too prosaic. Instead, poetry becomes one of the many ways you have of asking for things, and for being pleased by the asking.

Saint Strawberry, by Diana Hamilton. (via dignityisforotherpeople)

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must a movie be good? is it not enough to see Jake Gyllenhaal, unhinged?

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“I would like to beg you, dear, as well as I can, to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.”

— Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet, trans. unknown

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abba was right, at waterloo napoleon did surrender

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1) this still feels like a living nightmareeeee 

2) c was at the place i catered yesterday, and for the first time ever was early enough to be there when i dropped off food. and it was Fine, but he texted me a thing after and then i told him to eat some vegetables, and he responded and included a nickname he used to use, which was, uh? uhhhh? made me feel doted upon but also felt inappropriate and sad, since i know it doesn’t mean anything now; then we had a weird exchange late at night when i was like ‘we should chat again sometime’ because we are Being Friends (and it is still unclear to me if i’m doing this in an okay way or not, as in, in a way that is motivated by putting off pain and not dealing with the Void that i find myself in otherwise; to be continued, that debate); and now i don’t know where we stand and if he like hates me thinks i’m dumb etc. because that’s where i Go with these things. deep seated self loathing gets in to your relationships because of course it does, & cracks them apart, and also makes the fallout very hard

3) being in my gardens makes me feel better even though it is not immune to the feeling that everything i do feels like waiting/avoiding

4) i’m reading pema chodron and that is Good

5) tmi /// org*sms also make me feel better l o l

6) i chatted with some musician on okc (why! though) and almost met up but didn’t and the familiar nervous excitement and false sense of hope made today worse, can I be banned from dating apps

7) i got a tarot reading from an amazing witch person I've followed on insta for a while and it was a lot & really really reeeally good and I need to talk with someone about it

8) i think i’m dropping out of school for the time being for many reasons; supported by my closest classmate friend who has also dropped out for different reasons, and gently encouraged by c a while back; but I have solid plans to keep learning in different ways, and I trust myself to come back to it; but will i feel like i’m a mess and a fool and a disappointment for the next year? maybe!!

9) friends are nice and sweet but u still gotta be alone most of the time! 

10) i would like to be comforted & beloved thanks!!! i miss being beloved in the specific good full way i was!! but if there’s a point to any of this, or something i should be listening to, it’s that i need to not need to be comforted and beloved just to function in the world!! at the same time i uhhh deserve that like everyone does