transatlantici-sm - Tumblr blog

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https://instagram.com/p/BeRDVT4hkf8/

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*accidentaly vents to friend* great now i can never speak to them again

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even after all this time you still make my heart stop beating

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“and sometimes, love just isn’t enough.”

DY, a six word story (via wnq-writers)

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Today my dad told me he wishes I'd died last month

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We've been very close, and I know you very well, you're such a strong individual and all I've seen is you growing as a person and embracing who you are, so please don't let anything set you back. Small or big you're strong enough to take it on, everyone knows how strong you are, just please remember it yourself.

I don't think I am particularly strong anymore. I surround myself with strong people and they seem to do most of the heavy lifting. I am just sort of floating around. I am trying to be better, I promise. But I seem to find myself wandering around aimlessly, and as much as I am trying to recover I am also realising that there doesn't seem to be much a future for me. I wish I wanted one, and I am sorry that I don't.

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This time felt different. This time I wasn't sad, I wasn't crying, nothing had happened. I was having such a good day. Probably the best day I'd had in a long time. And I still wanted everything to end. And I thought if that was the best I could hope for, why bother? I gave up. But it didn't work, and now everyone knows my business and everyone's trying to help but all I can think about is how I shouldn't be here. I feel like I am living someone else's time. It should've worked.

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I don't know if I'm too big or too small or if I'm too trapped or too free but I feel like everyone is part of this big jigsaw and I'm from a different puzzle and I so almost fit and if I cram myself in it might work for a while but eventually people are going to realise that I don't belong here

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I am tired of people saying that I'm young and I'll get over it, or that it's hormones, or that "everyone gets bad days". I know all of that. And I know I am not the only sad person in the world. But I'm not even sad anymore. I don't feel like crying anymore. I don't care about anything. I don't care about college or uni or going out or loving anyone. I can't figure out which stuff I'm supposed to dread and which stuff I'm supposed to be excited about. I don't feel either. I don't actively wish things to be over but I don't think I would mind if they were.

I don’t feel like I fit

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I don't feel like I need to run away anymore, but I need it all to stop

I don’t feel like I fit

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I can't tell if I'm trapped or if I'm too free

I don’t feel like I fit

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There is a small part of me that hopes things will be different but I know they won't.

I don’t feel like I fit

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I'm slowly realising that it isn't these things that don't fit me it's me that doesn't fit these things

I don’t feel like I fit