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tragedyofdevotion · 15 days ago

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𝐕𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐕𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐭 !

⊹.˚🪞🕯️♡ you've managed to snag the man of your dreams and things can't be better. however, having your heart race 24/7 is a borderline inhumane feeling but you would not trade it for the world.

and you know what? neither would he.

yandere! honkai star rail! x yandere! reader. (ana's faves. as per usual.)

˚.🎀༘⋆ 𝐣𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐮𝐚𝐧.

He truly was like a fairytale come to life. How else could one man be so otherworldly handsome?

You would say that to Jing Yuan over and over as you would sit in his pretty garden as the ravishing flowers kept you hidden from any prying eyes. The man would nestle himself comfortably anywhere he could, as long as you had your arms wrapped around him he really did not care for the position he was in.

It was so hard to control yourself. How could you possibly keep your cool around him, especially whenever he would start looking at you with those dreamy eyes? Sometimes in the heat of the moment you would curse him, tell him that it's all his fault for making you feel like this, that he was to blame for slowly turning you into such a bitter person.

The General was incredibly popular on the Lofu, it was only natural for him to have his fair share of fans and admirers. You would force yourself to smile through it all, to grit your teeth as all his adoring fans would sell countless photos of him and you would always try so hard to cling onto his arm whenever you'd spot a camera nearby.

Vultures, the lot of them. If you could have it your way, they would all be tossed into outer space and never be seen again. White hot rage bubbled deep inside your soul at the prospect of anyone thinking themselves good enough to steal him away from you but those people would only meet the sharp end of your wrath.

It was their choice whether or not there would be a peaceful resolution.

However, the moment he placed a soothing hand on your cheek all of that rage would subside to joy. Anger turned to passion, bitterness became sweetness and Jing Yuan could not be more happy at the thought that he had you wrapped around his little finger.

He was a lucky man. He was going to cherish you until his dying breath.

˚.🎀༘⋆ 𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲.

Soft inklings of delicate candlelight broke through the dark room as you ran your fingers sweetly through Sunday's hair. His head lay still in your lap, face pressed deeply into your thighs as his arms nestled themselves around your body, a silent plea for you to not leave. His grip was tighter than iron as he groaned, the tension in his shoulders melting away like ice in heat.

Whatever was he going to do without you? How could he even live if you were not there by his side?

Such cursed thoughts simply must be banished from his worried mind. For if he were to think too hard about those nightmares, his despair might just swallow him whole.

He could feel your lovesick gaze, a stark contrast to the delicate touch of your fingers as they grazed his scalp. There were times when you would trap him in your embrace and whisper things to him, things that should horrify any sane person. You'd utter your devotion to him like a prayer, chanting endless spells of your bottomless love and devotion and instead of stopping you, he would allow you to speak your mind as his own would simply cease to work.

If there was the option, you'd devour him whole. That way he could never leave you, or so you would like to say.

And the idea of that, it... It was strangely appealing to him. It was the one cage he would never dare to break.

˚.🎀༘⋆ 𝐣𝐢𝐚𝐨𝐪𝐢𝐮.

Soft pink hair dominated your vision as the scent of spices overpowered the rest of your senses, much to the cheeky foxian's delight. You shared a bed with him as his pretty tail wrapped itself around your waist, thwarting any possible escape attempts. With a chuckle you inched closer and pressed your lips on his temple, to which Jiaoqiu hummed in delight.

As per usual, you made no moves to leave.

Good, he thought to himself as his fingernails dug into your flesh, just barely enough so that it doesn't hurt. His tail fluttered with content as birds chirped happily outside the window, the gentle rays of sunlight cascading down on the pair as they reveled in their sweet bliss.

For a brief second, Jiaoqiu could not help but to think of the whispers others would share amongst themselves, how they would judge him and his darling, how twisted and wrong their whole relationship was..

How can something that feels so sweet be so wrong? How can someone who makes him feel alive and loved be disgusting in the eyes of others?

Fools. Each and every one of them. Blind fools who could not see true love even if it hit them square in the jaw.

They were not important, none of them. As long as he had you in his arms, his soul could rest.

˚.🎀༘⋆ 𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐨𝐧.

The crackling flames roared with hunger beside you as you skimmed through the seemingly endless gifts of devotion your dearly beloved seemed to get on a nearly daily basis.

A deep frown etched itself on your red tinted lips as you carelessly threw another letter into the orange fire, not giving a damn about the person who wrote it nor their feelings. Who did they think they were, trying to so carelessly throw their own personal longing onto your beloved Phainon?

Wickedness became second nature to you once you had managed to snag the handsome Chrysos Heir all for yourself. The mere thought of other people wanting him, touching him, looking at him... It made your stomach churn with nausea.

It was all too common for Phainon to receive gifts and words of praise and it was just something one had to grow accustomed to if they planned to stand by his side. But by the stars, the way in which you would burn with jealousy could almost be studied.

You could not allow Phainon to see this side of you.

What would he think of you then? Resting your arms against the messy table you sigh, mind pondering on all of the various scenarios of your lover becoming horrified with this newfound twisted nature of yours... Completely oblivious to the shadow which loomed on the balcony, his body hidden by the massive white pillars as gorgeous blooms came to life.

It was as if they were matching his own personal excitement, their wonderful colours signaling all of his own feelings.

Love, obsession, devotion, need - these were all things that Phainon fought with daily. Sometimes he would grant himself the luxury of indulgence - keeping you in the bath longer with him, making up some excuse on why you should stay in his room, that it's fine if he wants to feed you... He wondered if you went along with it just to keep the peace, to ensure his happiness which was in its own way cute but...

Never in his wildest dreams could Phainon have predicted that you would return his intense feelings. If he could, he would carve out his own heart right then and there and give it to you, the chunk of flesh beating joyfully as he would get on his knees and present it to you with his outstretched, bloodied hands, his lips twisted into a loopy grin.

And he now knew that he would never have to worry ever again. Your love has been secured, your devotion is being kept under lock and key and it was all in the palm of his hand.

I wrote this very, very, very quickly, which I feel as though is super obvious. Still, it was super fun to tackle... Mutual obsession is just such a cute concept, no? And I wasn't feeling too inspired for Jiaoqiu's part, oops. It's just that, I feel like he would be the most "normal" one in this specific scenario, y'know? I also wrote this whole thing backwards for some reason??? Like, I didn't start with Jing, I actually started doing Phainon first.

This little playlist was also lovely to listen to as I was writing. What a wonderful way to spend my rainy Sunday afternoon. Also, I'm half way through the first season of Fruits Basket! It's such a cute little show and I'm watching the 2019 version!!

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tragedyofdevotion · 19 days ago

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tw; yandere, murder, forced confinement, unedited

After an unsuccessful escape attempt you expect screaming or anger but all you get is a perpetual anxiety looming over your head. Convinced that he’ll nip the problem in the bud and break your feet for good. Or that he’ll nip the problem and finally get rid of you. At least that’s what the Viktor you pictured would do. The fastidious perfectionist who would rather die than reveal any of his flaws to the world.

After all, you were his biggest flaw, his only flaw.

His relationship with you had always been strange, you wouldn’t call it love, not when at times—when he was convinced you were asleep—he looked at you with enough vitriol to convince you he wanted you dead. But it wasn’t outright hatred, not when he kept you well dressed and fed, pampered and cared for like a porcelain doll and didn’t dare to lay a hand on you.

He mostly let you do as you pleased, as long as you were within the confines of his mansion. That was the only rule you had to live by, at first, it was a good deal. Your freedom in exchange for your life. A life where nothing was expected of you and all your desires would be fulfilled. But even well-cared-for pets start to wilt away if kept in an isolated cage long enough and you were no different.

It started with your sense of time, days merged together, what did you eat yesterday? Did you already read this book last week, or was it last month? Did you already watched this movie before, why can’t you remember?

Then it was the loneliness. Whatever staff there were around the house rarely talked to you, they would reply with short answers and leave as soon as their work was done. Viktor himself never talked to you either. You caught him staring at you from a distance occasionally, but he would never approach you unless you were asleep. Instead, he’d send gifts—books, movies, food, anything you wanted even if you just mentioned it in passing in front of anyone. But none of it brought joy or excitement anymore. After some time you didn’t even have the energy to open the boxes anymore.

Eventually, it led to outbursts. It was a pathetic sight, seeing a grown woman throw plates and whatever else she could grab. But you could feel yourself slipping away from your own grasp. So when you found yourself alone in the garden you ran for it. As fast as you could and as far as you could. It was the first time in months you felt something, the first time in months you truly wanted something but it was all cut short when you felt them get ahold of your dress. Just barely. But that’s all it took for you to trip over, giving them enough time to drag you back home kicking and screaming. Crying to be let go as you finally remembered why you agreed to this ridiculous offer in the first place.

Lastly, fear. The only time you remember speaking to Viktor was when he first dragged you to this isolated estate. “You can do as you please here as long as you don’t try to leave.” He left the room after saying that. The blood on his suit and unconsolable state you were in probably had something to do with it but he was true to his word, even as you tore up the expensive gifts he gave you and threw food to the ground the moment it was brought to you. But this time you had managed to leave the property, despite being immediately dragged back. You broke the one rule there was. So the pit in your stomach grew deeper when you were guided to the dining room. You hadn’t seen it used before, since you ate in your room and he in his office but it was a daunting room, as grandly decorated as any other part of the house.

You sat opposite him but he didn’t even bother looking up from his plate. Just motioning you to heave a seat as he continued cutting the stake before him. He knew it was selfish to want you. He knew how disgusted you would be if he tried to lay a single hand on you but he wasn’t a good enough man to just let you go. So instead, he settled on having you where he could keep a close eye on you. He would keep his filthy hands from sullying your skin as long as you stayed with him, as long as you didn’t belong to anyone else. This was his last act of mercy upon you. But it irked him, could you not even do this much for him?

“Why did you do it?” Viktor was calm despite the inner turmoil. Getting up to place the plate of cut stake in front of you, taking your uncut plate instead. It was then that he finally looked up to you. “Answer me, [name].” It had already been long since you started bawling your eyes, just whispering incoherent apologies in hopes that it could lessen whatever punishment awaiting you.

He was like this that day too, tearing through that man. Ignoring the screams, focused solely on making sure nothing was left of him. You were barely acquaintances when you became a witness to it, his only mistake. It was meant to be the perfect crime, the man–or whatever was left of him– was a business rival who kept getting in the way of his father’s plan. It's a shame though, Viktor planned on asking you out after this ordeal was over, it's just unfortunate you had to be there at that time.

He was hopeful that you would come around eventually though, Stockholm syndrome can happen! But instead, you just kept getting worse. “You…are you going to kill me?” You managed to muster the courage to ask between sobs. “Kill you?” For a second, Viktor felt truly astonished, after all he did, did you still think he would do that? He paused for a second.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Even he couldn’t contain it at this point. If he wanted you dead, you both knew he would've done it that day. What was the point of all that restraint when you’re still on square one?

if enough of u like this oneshot I’ll draw the whole thing 👅👅 (jk no promises)

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tragedyofdevotion · 24 days ago

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# 𝐌𝐘 𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐒

<< yandere genshin men x empress reader >> Concubine AU

Character : zhongli, diluc, ayato, alhaitham, Childe, baizhu.

( inspired by the story of apothecary diaries as well the concubine system in ancient china )

The empress is the mother of the nation as well being a regal and possessed the beauty of a celestial maiden, as well the mother of the crown prince is known by the nation as the goddess of love due to possessing many admirers.

Warning : non-con, patriarchy system, abortion mention, touching and more

<< viewers discretion is advised >>

# ZHONGLI

- the emperor of the nation, the husband of the empress as well the father of the crown prince, a powerful warrior that holds the abilities of the draconic god of the nation, the one that created a force field around the continent to defend the nation from the abyssal monsters he is busy with his attendant and generals defending the nation bothers due to high activity of monster. leaving the city to fight leaving you in charge but don't worry he will be back, The emperor and the empress were childhood friends, the empress was forced by the emperor to marry him, zhongli possessed much hire status stand you. You were the child of his wet nurse.

- zhongli and you grow up close together, he made a promise towards you to make you the mother of the nation, originally you were already betrothed to someone but unfortunately your betrothed was executed thru false accusations of over throwing the nation.

- the next day you and him were to be married and the night before he visited your pavilion and upon that night he forced himself upon you, and he didn't even feel bad he felt bliss and pleasure even tho you were suffering

- due to this accident the crown prince was consummated that night. The entire kingdom was celebrating holding a three day festival for the new emperor. You were silent the entire time while everybody was celebrating all you could think is how your baby is gonna suffer in this world being born not out of love.

- you would try to find ways to save him from being born by finding ways to miscarriage until the emperor finally catches on to what you are trying to do and locks you up on the pavilion not allowing you to anywhere and no one is allowed to talk to you only him it was pure torture but he made a proposal you are allowed to take many consort as much you want. Even tho he hated sharing you he knows he's the first to everything towards you the baby is proof and if those consort wanna steal you away they have to go thru him.

#DILUC

- the favoured consort, the empress most beloved consort and imperial consort the second towards the emperor. Known thru the entire palace or court as a kind gentleman. Overseeing the nations trading goods as well assisting the empress on her duties to overrule the nation meanwhile the emperor is out.

- The son of a western merchant that comes from the royal bloodline, he originally was sent into the nation for business, his family owns a popular wine industry that is widely known across the world. And when he met the empress it was during a tournament being hosted

- originally he didn't think of participating but his brother as a prank signed his name on the list of fighters so he had no choice of joining, when he entered the arena and looked around and his eyes landed on you in all of your glory.

- you and him make eye contact when he was snapped out of it during the announcer yanfei asked him to enter the arena, he could feel 4 pairs of eyes, one is full of adoration and the other one is full of jealousy and hatred he guess it was the emperor sitting next to you.

- after the match he received a message from an eunuch that was asking for his presence because the empress wants to see him, and he met you as well as your husband staring at him with disdain, he was chosen to be a consort towards the empress. And that's how he joined in the harem.

- he and the illustrious consort is known to have a rivalry for the empress affection, due to him being the most visited consort by the empress the illustrious consort has been trying to find ways to sabotage him but by far the most he hated In the court is the emperor, he is the empress destined to be and main lover meanwhile he's just a consort, the emperor know this fact and takes pride and mock the entire harem that the empress is his.

#AYATO

- The illustrious consort second towards the imperial consort diluc, a cunning and mischievous consort the reason why many consorts of the harem disappear or run away allegedly was because of him, he Eliminated anyone that's been trying to get in his way for the empress. His trusted attendant Thomas is sent to deal matters while he and the empress spent time together.

- the son of the most prestigious clan of the nation, he managed to pull some strings to get himself into the harem. After he heard that the empress is allowed to take in multiple consorts he goes right up ahead trying to get himself into the harem.

- he and diluc have been trying to one up the other, he believes that he should be the imperial consort and hates how diluc is always the one getting attention, and not to mention the death of many lower ranking consorts are his fault, they are pathetic and not worthy of his beloved empress attention.

- during his entrance to the harem, many of his subordinates disguise themselves as servants to work under him, when he wishes the death of a consort that has been too cocky about the empress he sent them to assassinate that lowly consort.

- he will use his looks, status, and intelligence to slide his way into the court and the empress heart. His by far one of the nations greatest getting by far one of the highest scores in the nations court exams and secure a place as the emperor strategist and when right time he will strike.

# ALHAITHAM

- a scholar and envoy for the land of wisdom ruler and was sent to negotiate with the emperor to take lord kusanali place, arrive with other 3 envoys ( kaveh, tighnari, cynon) to discuss matters. Unfortunately the emperor was out and unable to attend the meeting so you take your husband place

- you welcome your visitors with open arms and get the servant to ready the guest room for them since the meeting is gonna last for one week to establish cooperation and business between both of your nations. The rumors were true your beauty was immacable.

- when you were giving a tour of the palace you will always be followed by guards and ladies waiting as if they're making sure you will never leave and always 3 steps behind you. after the tour alhaitham decided to go out and look around the city, and during his walk, he heard many rumors about you and the emperor so when his back, he used his skill to convince a servant who worked in the palace about you and the emperor.

- the servant told him the story about you and the emperor the version that was realest towards the public not the actual truth, so steal a eunuch keys to enter the palace libraries holding records of everything and found a book holding records about you and the emperor consumption and the birth of the prince, that process of producing the crown prince was too early, based on his studies in the akedemiya.

- and during the months of pregnancy the stress was unbearable causing you to find ways to abort the baby so the emperor decided to keep you in captivity not allowing you to leave your room. Piece by piece he puzzled the truth, poor you, force into a life you never wish betrayed by your loved ones, he will find ways to save you from this life.

#CHILDE

- another envoy who was sent towards the nation and accidentally got mistaken as a barbarian due to his bloodlust for battle, during his carriage it was so boring he needed to find ways to get rid of it, low and behold some monsters are in a field unbeknownst to him those monster was purposely put there to fight of some of the creatures that were eating the crops of the royal palace as well as pets for the servants.

- minutes later he was tied up and was presented towards the empress as entertainment when he was about to be executed but his eyes were on you, before the blade could decapitated him many of his underlings who were looking everywhere for him burst thru the door commanding towards the executioner to put his blade down.

- the truth was revealed he was an envoy and his underlings were forced to apologize for his place since he was the one that killed the royal monster, he didn't care because he knows that he wouldn't easily die because if the blade came in contact with him it will release a shockwave of electro around the room.

- but the entire time he was adoring you, so after the misunderstanding cleared up he was escorted to his room. He hands all of his works towards his underlings because he wants to see you before they could protest he was already gone using his inhuman speed to follow you.

- during the night, he managed to break into the royal chamber of the emperor and empress room where they shared together a good thing the emperor was out, he heard the emperor was a powerful warrior that holds the title of god of martial arts and holds strength rivalling the gods defeating other worldly entities to defend his nation. Look at you peacefully sleeping unaware of him watching you, you're probably left unsatisfied with your husband absentsy but don't worry he's here to fulfill your desires.

#BAIZHU

- the royal physician of the royal court, he personally does daily check ups on you during your pregnancy and birth of the crown prince supervising you through the process. As well making sure the crown prince is healthy.

- the most skilled and renowned physicians and healers of the nation were sought out by the emperor to supervise the crown prince birth and empress well being. Also a former student of the akedemiya.

- he of course knows the truth of when the crown prince was conceived, during your pregnancy he would supervise you and do daily checks up on you. You were always on high alert when you were near him because you don't know him very well but he became useful towards the emperor.

- he and the crown prince have a good relationship, sometimes the prince would seek him because he likes to help him make medicine, poor prince unaware the truth of his birth regardless you were a okay mother of course sometimes the prince reminds you of the emperor but you will always try to be present in his life.

- since he supervise your health and so he make sure your food is full of nutrients but sometimes he would add something towards your meal causing you to fall into sickness so he's able to see you with out suspension, every check up he would take time with you as if he was admiring art, he would over due it and caressed some parts that could lead him to be executed by the emperor good things he's not here and he's able to adore and admire you, and he will soon try to develop ways to poison the emperor.

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tragedyofdevotion · 28 days ago

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hello darling, just started following you and omfg I love your writing style and characterisation of Sae. I will always be here for toxic ex Sae btw that only shows up in your life when it’s convenient for him or you seem to be moving on hmm

cw. nsfw

hi nonnie dear, this is such a compliment ahh i’m gonna be thinking about this for a while hehe you’re so kind, thank you :)

and ohhhhhhhhhhhhh don’t make me go there because absolutely. toxic ex sae would undoubtedly be the most selfish ex there is lol. the funny thing about it is that he’ll act so nonchalant and aloof, he just thinks it’ll make for a better reaction from your boy toy. for him, he thinks he’s doing it for the better of you both—that you deserve better and well, nothing gets better than him lmao. he will go over the top than usual to constantly remind you that you don’t need to look for anyone else when no one compares to him.

and him showing up in his own convenience and jealously ughh he’s sadistic & petty for that nonnie </3 because he SWEARS it’s out of your best interest, and that you shouldn’t lower your standards to “lukewarm nobodies” but in reality, all he wants to see is a man who shares romantic feelings towards you get his ego crushed by him over a few sentences—his sadistic ass wouldn’t even feel bad when they’re storming out of your place because of how unfair the entire situation is. your ex is a pro footballer? that also happens to be the best soccer player in all of japan? fuck that shit. but sae is winning the idgaf war lmao.

because unfortunately, it works every single time. him making you re-think your choices in men, believing that sae is the only one who can make you feel like you’re on top of the world—even if you’re not exactly his. believing that he cares and loves you, for the better of you both. until he has you picking up a phone call from your boy-toy calling you to cut things off with sae when all he can do is laugh behind you before slapping the fat of your ass as he’s blowing your back. telling you to go on, cut things off with me. then he’s got you again.

okay i’m rambling but toxic ex sae is just spiteful & will go out of his way to collect his little ego feeding coins lol

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tragedyofdevotion · 28 days ago

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જ⁀♡⊹｡° the world ended when it happened to me

( sae itoshi x fem! reader )

♡ a/n — for my childhood best friends to lover series :)

♡ word count — 1.3k

♡ content — sae itoshi x fem! reader, sae itoshi x fem! reader, angst i fear, goes from childhood to the U-20 game, no real explanation for why sae comes back from spain lowkey evil (canon), rin blames reader for sae changing, rin and reader are best friends, best friends brother trope

♡ synopsis — your whole life you've loved sae itoshi, but maybe childhood love wasn't as glamourous as everyone made it seem.

You were always around the Itoshi brothers.

Rin’s best friend, the annoyingly happy girl who somehow made yourself at home in their lives. Sae used to think you were a menace, a constant storm of giggles and relentless chatter that disrupted the quiet balance of his house.

You had been Rin Itoshi’s best friend for as long as you could remember — a whirlwind of energy and relentless optimism, the complete opposite of the quiet, serious boy who barely cracked a smile. But for some reason, he tolerated you. Maybe even liked you, though he'd never admit it.

Sae, on the other hand, made no secret of his disdain.

“Why is she always here?” he muttered one afternoon, rubbing his temples as you sang loudly along to a cartoon theme song.

“She’s my friend,” Rin mumbled through a mouthful of snacks.

“She’s annoying,” Sae shot back, glaring as you dramatically collapsed on the floor like you’d been shot.

“I heard that!” you chirped, grinning up at him.

“Good.”

And yet, the first time you barged into his room, he didn’t yell.

He was sick, curled up in bed, voice scratchy as he warned you from across the room, “Get out. You’ll get sick, idiot.”

But you didn’t listen. You tiptoed in, holding out a crumpled drawing with three stick figures labeled "Rin," "Sae," and "Me," all holding hands beneath a bright yellow sun.

“I made this,” you whispered, as if speaking too loudly would break him. “I wanted you to have it.”

Sae stared at the paper, throat tight. He didn’t thank you, didn’t smile, just turned his head and muttered, “Whatever.”

The week he recovered, his phone rang. He sighed when he saw your name, swiping to answer as he rubbed at his temple.

“You were right,” you croaked, voice completely hoarse. “I got sick.”

Sae rolled his eyes, but there was a ghost of a smile tugging at his lips. Yeah. You could stick around.

By the time you started middle school, you were practically part of the Itoshi household. You and Rin stuck together like glue.

You struggled with English — despised it, really — and Rin tried to help, but he wasn’t patient like Sae. So, you turned to the older brother, begging for tutoring sessions.

“No,” he said flatly when you asked.

“Please?” you pleaded, clasping your hands.

“You’re hopeless,” he muttered, but he still helped you.

Sae pretended to hate it, acted like he was being forced to suffer through your presence. But he showed up every day after school, meticulously explaining grammar rules while you doodled on the edges of your notebook.

Somewhere along the way, he started looking forward to those afternoons.

He liked the way you tilted your head when you were confused, how you brightened like the sun when he praised you for getting an answer right. He liked that it was just the two of you — no Rin, no distractions. Just you and him, your elbow knocking against his as you leaned in close to read from his textbook.

And maybe, in your twelve-year-old heart, you started feeling the same.

When Sae was recruited for the Real Madrid Academy at thirteen, the entire town buzzed with excitement. Everyone said it was a miracle, that Sae Itoshi would change Japanese soccer forever.

You were proud of him. But when you lay in bed that night, staring at your ceiling, all you wanted was to beg him to stay.

To keep being your tutor. To keep being around.

The night before he left, Sae texted you to meet him at the park. You assumed Rin would be there, but when you asked, Sae just shrugged.

“He fell asleep,” he said, licking his ice cream.

The truth was, he hadn’t told Rin at all.

You sat on the bench together, you pouting as you flipped the stick in your hand to reveal the kanji for "bad luck," while Sae’s said "good luck."

“Why are you lucky at everything?” you grumbled, tossing your stick aside.

Sae chuckled, the sound low and rare. He started dribbling his soccer ball between his feet, gaze focused as he said, “You can still call me, you know?”

“Huh?”

“For school stuff. Or... whatever.” He didn’t look at you when he said it.

In your childish mind, that was enough. You smiled, bright and unburdened.

“It’s a promise!”

“Yeah,” Sae echoed, teal eyes flicking to yours. “It’s a promise.”

He left a week later.

Rin fell apart without his brother. You stayed by his side, comforting him through the ache of Sae’s absence. And yet, you hid your phone under your pillow at night, quietly texting Sae about homework or your day.

You stayed by Rin’s side, comforting him, hiding the fact that you and Sae texted constantly. He never texted Rin. Only you.

Two years of texts and rare calls passed, and one night, the realization hit you like a freight train: you were in love with Sae.

You’d loved him since he got you sick, since he bought you ice cream, since he promised you could still talk to him.

You’d loved him since he caught the flu,

Since he drew diagrams in your notebook to help you with prepositions,

Since he made that promise to answer your calls.

One late-night call sealed your fate.

As you rambled on the phone about school, Sae mumbled, half-asleep, “I love your voice.”

You stopped talking, heart hammering, but by the time you opened your mouth to respond, he was snoring.

“I love you, Sae,” you whispered into the receiver.

“I love you too,” he muttered, voice thick with sleep, one eye cracking open to catch your stunned expression.

From then on, you and Sae were together. Quietly, distantly, but together.

When Sae came back at seventeen, he didn’t tell you.

Rin did.

rin-rin: Sae’s home

his text said.

rin-rin: I hope you enjoy that you’ve ruined him

You panicked, blowing up Rin’s phone with calls he never answered, some being sent straight to voicemail after the first few tries. And then Sae was at your door, taller, sharper, his face unreadable.

You burst into tears before you even spoke.

“Please talk to Rin,” you begged, clutching at his sleeve. “I don’t know what I did wrong, but I’ll fix it — please, just talk to him—”

But the look in Sae’s eyes was like ice, gorgeous, but dangerous- unsafe- fated to slip away

“You’re a bother,” he said, voice flat.

You froze.

“Huh?”

“You’ve clung to me since you were a kid. You’re nothing but a disease I need to get rid of.”

You laughed, shaky and desperate. “Sae, that’s not funny—”

“I’m not joking. I’m done with you.”

The wind howled as snowflakes caught in his hair. You collapsed to the floor, hugging your knees as Sae turned on his heel, leaving you crumpled on your doorstep, the door swinging in the cold winter wind.

You lost both Itoshis in one night. And you didn’t even know why.

A year and a half later, you sat alone in your living room, watching the Blue Lock vs. Japan U-20 match.

Rin, your old best friend, was on one team. Sae, your first love, was on the other.

And you stayed home, stuck in the same town, the same life, still struggling with English.

The camera zoomed in on Sae’s face, and something inside you snapped.

Without thinking, you hurled the remote at the screen, a crack spiderwebbing across his perfect, indifferent, calm, beautiful, heartbreakingly distant expression

The TV shut off, leaving you in suffocating silence.

Sae Itoshi had everything he wanted — fame, success, the world at his feet.

And you were still here. Stuck. Left behind.

Trying to understand how the world ended for you, while for Sae, it had only just begun.

You curled up on the couch, burying your face in a pillow as the weight of it all crushed you.

You’d lost them. Both of them.

And you didn’t even know why.

GO LISTEN TO WE HUG NOW BY SYDNEY ROSE NOW!!

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tragedyofdevotion · 1 month ago

Text

┌─ “ ! „ TWO OF CUPS .04.

tw. incest, dubcon, coercion, size kink, belly bulge, praise, hair pulling, a lot of emotional bs, jealousy, angst, love triangle wordcount. 7k

part 01 part 02 part 03 fin.

a/n. it has come. the end has come, she's here, it's over and the witch is dead (i'm the witch, this killed me a little inside but i'm very glad to have it finished). as always i would love to hear your interpretations and thoughts about this chapter and story in general because i feel like there's a lot here thats,, up for interpretation and discussion and yea <33 and ty ty ty a million to @seijorhi and @darlingsanzu for beta-ing for me i am in your debt forever and ever

itoshi rin x fem!reader x itoshi sae

He imagines if it were anywhere else, the room would be covered in a thin layer of dust by now. But it isn’t, courtesy of a caring, fretful mother— the room remains in pristine, paled stasis. Instead every old textbook, every picture frame and the ancient soccer jerseys have been dutifully cleaned, and are splayed out in front of him like a near-perfect copy of his childhood. Sae runs his fingers along the length of the desk as he slowly drags himself around the room in a circle, before coming to a halt in front of the bookshelf.

His parents were as surprised as any to see him home, considering he should be ready to head back to Spain soon, with the upcoming season and all. And truthfully, he had been ready to call his bumbling excuse for a manager two days ago. Should’ve landed splayed out in yet another sterile hotel room in a place he doesn’t care to explore hours ago. So he blankly wishes he could play pretend at amazement too. It isn’t very surprising that in his time of uncertainty, he finds himself here- where he used to keep you locked in his arms under thick blankets. He hasn’t been back home in a while. And not unlike other times, there’s a nagging voice in the back of his head.

He picks apart the perfect little shrine of accomplishments of his childhood room by pulling the picture frame up to his face, can’t help but frown at the sight. There’s a younger him -years before he joined Real Madrid- sweaty, sore ankles and exhausted on a bench, and right beside the youthful reflection of his own maroon-haired head, sits a girl a couple years younger. Her cheeks chubby and raised as the beaming smile shines all the way though the flimsy picture paper- and your arms wrapped endlessly tight around his stomach as joyous tears glitter on your lashes.

He won that match, of course, but that uneventful match out of thousands before it wasn’t why the picture landed itself a spot in the middle of his most cherished valuables. You were. The memory of your heart beating into him like a drum, of how it felt to be adored by you. Adoration that had gotten stale years before you’d started giving your all to him— felt different when it came from someone with no deeper motives. When all he’d ever given you was an unending game of playing catch-up.

His hand twitches with the urge to toss the picture back down with the rest of his sentimental crap. He doesn’t bother to put it back in place, pushing it aside for the tiered trophy that looks much too big among his other old belongings. The gold layer gleams in the low light of his room as he takes it off of the shelf, and his frown digs deeper into his face.

But a soft clearing of a throat by the door makes him look up. His mother smiles as she appraises the room, and then him. “I’m making you a protein smoothie. I know you probably won’t stay the night but-”

“I’m driving up to the airport tonight,” he breathes out, trying his best to force the distaste off of his face. His mother nods again, and then steps inside almost cautiously, as if not to disturb the peace of the past. Ironic, Sae thinks, considering. He only came here to do exactly that. Nothing in the Itoshi house is sacred, hasn’t been for years. After a few seconds he plops the trophy onto the desk, and stares down at the woman before him with a deep sigh. “You came in here to say something, right? What’s up?”

You spend enough time with people over the years, you learn their tells. The reddish brunette starts picking at the pictures thumb-tacked above his desk before she speaks. “You stayed over at Rin’s for a few days… We haven't seen either of your siblings in a while.” A pointless starter, because they both know these facts. She’s stalling, tiptoeing around any point worth making.

“Oh, yeah,” he breathes. She could ask about his sudden visit. Or about Rin’s blatant dismissal of going anywhere that you won’t follow. Could ask about what Sae himself did to you. Maybe he’d finally be able to give a straight answer, if she dared. But she doesn’t, and Sae goes back to thumbing through the old photo album tucked away behind a mess of medals. His mother hums.

“You know we’ve tried to raise them to be respectful, and Rin’s shown promise. But your sister—”

Sae’s somewhat of a sadist, he thinks. To everyone around him, but also to himself. Coming here was a surefire way to land himself into shit, and yet... “They’re both in Tokyo and they get along well, mom. What’s the problem with living together?”

“Your father and I think your little sister should start letting you two live your own lives. I know she means well, but isn’t she a little too old to be so- well— you know how she is.” It once again is anything but a compliment. He knows how you are. Sure, folded in angles no brother should ever know his little sister, maybe. It makes a slight breath escape his nose like a laugh, but there’s nothing funny about it. “How else will she ever accomplish—”

“She’s fine! I’m fine, Rin’s fine— and it’s not like you ever cared, anyways. As long as we all hold up your precious standards, you don’t really bother to care, right?” The ticking of his internal alarm reaches zero, as he turns around to stare her down with thinly veiled impatience. “Your constant shit-stirring is what started this whole mess.” No wonder you grew into a codependent ball of emotion. What else could you do than let him kiss your mouth in the peace of night when he begged you to stay. What else could you do than let Rin sink all his problems into the warmth of you.

Your parents don't have the slightest idea of who any of them are, not really. It could hit them in the face and still somehow miss them. It’s almost amusing.

Her face goes red in the cheeks, sharp eyebrows starting to slant into the irritated grimace that he’s more used to. “What ‘whole mess’? What, what? I’m at fault for being concerned? I would expect you to know by now, Sae. Your little sister’s a needy, unstable girl with no further prospects like you two! And Rin-”

“She probably loves Rin more than you and dad combined ever could. She’s been to every match. Not you, her.” His voice is low and final as he meets the sea blue eyes aimed at him head-on. “And Lord knows no husband will ever look at her like Rin does. But of course you’re too enamored with your ‘perfect children’ bullshit to understand what goes on.” He breezes past the accosted breath of his mother clutching her collar, before walking with long steps towards the door, and letting out a sharp chuckle. “Don’t talk to me about my own little sister. I know who she is.”

The street is too bright and prim for his liking, as he walks up the porch toward the building— slowly dragging himself after you as you hesitate at the threshold. Even your absent-minded humming doesn’t make his nerves any less frayed, moving his jaw back and forth when you bury your face back into the papers as if you have any clue what you’re doing. Long enough for his foot to start tapping a rapid rhythm, before he finally nudges your chin up to look up his way. “Hey, we don’t have to do this. You don’t- I…” There’s a distance between you two that seems to grow with each passing second. “This is silly,” he ends on saying, unwilling to dampen the barely-there brightness in your eyes for the first time in days.

Your lower lip juts out as his hand brushes just briefly past your cheek to clear your face, and the wind ruffles the stapled stack of paper. “Daddy told me I should move out of your apartment.” There’s a guardedness that flicks over your face for a second, before you pull out of his reach to start gathering your hair up into a high bun and nod, “there’s two more on my list, you can go home if you don’t want to stay, nii nii.”

Rin’s blue eyes narrow, and he grabs your wrist to pull you back before you can walk away from this. “Hey, forget about what dad says. You don’t have to move out.” The mere idea of having you slip through his fingers presses on his chest, rattling his ribs a little with each breath. It gnaws and claws at the back of his brain hard enough to make him a little dizzy and— and he knows you don’t want this. You can’t possibly think that being alone would somehow be better than being with him. “I never asked you to move out.”

“Niichan,” your voice is small when you dare turn more his way, revealing the wobbly lip as you try to pull your arm out of his reach. He can’t be wrong about that.

“I’m not- I’m not asking, okay? Listen, we’re going home-”

You shake, shoulders and head both. “Why are you making this so difficult? I know I’ve already overstayed my welcome, and you’re too nice to tell me ‘no’. That’s what this is.” No. He isn’t wrong. He knows you- and you couldn’t fake the kindness you give him when he fails the most basic family rules. If anyone imposes… it’s him. With every kiss along your shoulders in the bathroom, or when you let him pull you onto his lap to wind down whenever he damn pleases. His selfishness is the thing that overstayed— for long enough that he can’t even imagine his life without you.

His thoughts might not come out as well in words, but even you must know this much. You aren’t this self deprecating. Before he can find it in himself to care that you two are technically out in the open, he grabs your cheeks on both sides, and lowers himself to press his forehead to yours. He loves you. He loves you so much he could die. He hears, more than sees, how you fumble with the papers in your hands as he keeps you so close to him— opening up that shield for once. There is no world in which he allows it to end with you even further away.

“I want you to stay.” The whisper clearly deals more damage than he intends, because your eyes go glossy as soon as he says it. “Don’t make me beg you.” He pulls back from you just enough to take a breath, but his thumbs stay on your soft skin. You suck your bottom lip in between your teeth, before pulling up your nose and leaning the weight of your head into his one palm. It’s soft, and too gentle -makes him scared to snap you in two with a single move- he thinks it wouldn’t be past him. Sae delivered a serious blow, he knows that. If he wasn’t so green with envy, he’d be able to relate.

After a few more seconds, you faithfully reach to press your mouth to his like you’ve been conditioned to do. And hesitate, staring at the path under your feet. “Okay.” You wrap your arms around his waist— and only leave him aching for more.

Always more, barely getting his gluttonous fill started. Still, it makes his skin tingle with heat, buzzing along his lips. Your fingers lace themselves in his, and he’s only very vaguely aware of the old couple passing you two by with a disgruntled sigh. It makes him pull you protectively close. And a soft, almost fearful chuckle falls past his lips. “You aren’t going anywhere without me, okay?”

Rin doesn’t mind having a temper when it doesn’t play him parts. It is what made him the man he is today. When you’re not involved, he even likes it. But though he tries his very best to control himself, his jealousy inevitably ends up catching up to him. Patiently built up through the years— it barely makes it a whole week after Sae leaves before it bloats inside him and starts to rupture. Leaving a sour, sour taste deep in the crevices of his skull.

The apartment is all you when he walks in. It strikes him as you face him with big eyes, that warm at his presence. You’re wearing an oversized shirt that just about covers your ass, and are turning the food around in the pan as your face lights up; and any sane brother would act accordingly, but his brain insists. This is the sight he wants to be greeted with for the rest of his life. Having the one person who can harm you closest, or something. He always was an opportunist, but he thought Sae the selfish one.

It’s almost pitiful that you play your role so graciously. The tongs rattle against the cutting board when you perk up to kiss him, and for a second longer than usual, he keeps you. Ever since Sae, his guilt hasn’t been enough to keep the longing down. It’s karmic punishment, probably. Always stuck treading in the redhead’s footprints. He keeps his mouth against yours until you start getting hot in the face, and start fidgeting with his fingers.

Not that Rin cares. He simply wraps himself around your back and links his arms under your breasts, and knows you won’t protest. The colors of Sae’s barrage on your throat have yet to fade, deep purples and blues that tint yellow at the edges— and asks him to resist the urge to make his own. He truly, truly doesn’t mean to be this way. You’d probably have a breakdown, and he has yet to even touch that can of worms. In your presence, he almost forgets. If he wasn’t so often fucking reminded, maybe he’d be able to rid himself of the shackles he knows are clinking at his ankles.

The brief brush of his lips along your jaw makes you shiver, then you look back at him over your shoulder. “That tickles, nii nii. Stop it.”

“I’m just looking.” The cockettish curl that your lips take on when he raises a single brow is devilishly distracting, hips suddenly pressing much too close to yours— so he averts his eyes, but can’t make himself pull away from you. Instead he talks, trying not to nuzzle into your cheek. When you try to slip out, his hands chase, and trail fingertips along your skin just below the shirt. A shirt he recognizes as Sae’s when trying to hide away in your smell, only to be painfully reminded. After a long breath, he brushes a finger along your throat, resting his chin. “What’s all this?”

He’s sure you’re not naïve enough to miss the question. But you only raise your shoulders the slightest bit, and jut out your lip. “Hmm… I- don’t know.” It’s hardly a lie, convincing exactly no one. You don’t miss a beat though, and focus on the food. “How was the meeting?”

Rin can’t help but frown at the blatant dismissal, but tonight, he’s too tired to care. He’s so fucking sick of letting Sae in, even when he’s not even around. So he strokes your thigh harder, in an attempt to feel more of your heat. “Training this year will be in Germany and France.”

“Oh.” You seem to let out a silent sigh of gratitude as he lets you run, before the situation catches up with you. “Oh. For how long?”

“Three months.” The tone of your voice is distinctly soft, and has his eyes on the tiny drop of your mouth corners. It’s a non-issue, though. Even if he could physically stand it -which he’s not so sure he could, supporting his weight against your smaller body- he wouldn’t want to go. You’re coming, whether you like it or not. “What kind of hotel room do you want?” His instinct is to press another kiss to your cheek, trailing his mouth ever so slowly down to your throat and shoulder — and trying his fucking hardest not to let the whisper send his thoughts down the wrong path.

“Nii nii-”

Too late. It’s much too easy to envision you in the plush covers of his bed, moaning out his name like you did… Like he knows you can, dressed in his shirt instead. Your hips are pressed close to his, and you smell so fucking good, you have his eyes fluttering shut as he repositions his hands to your thighs. He only swallows hard, lets out a deep breath against the soft skin where your neck meets your shoulder, and forces himself to pull his mouth away.

There’s a low, rumbling sort of noise in his voice when he speaks next. “What? You’re coming along, right?” As he glances at the side of your face, he’s awfully aware of the jittery way you’re trying to continue dinner, blushy hot ears and cheeks, and lips puffy and glistening from biting them. It’s fucking unfair. His mind instinctively wanders, and heat pools in his cock and balls too quickly before he manages to take a few deep breaths. “I know you don’t wanna stay here all alone.”

“I don’t. If- If you want me to come, I will,” you nod, and also shiver when his hands softly squeeze in response. “You won’t mind sharing a room with me even in a hotel?”

God, he wants to bend you over and grab you by the collar for being so fucking dense. It’s cute though, too innocent to reason with- it stresses him out as much as it heats his entire body. How could he mind, after two years of sleeping in the same bed as you. “We’re used to it, ‘course I don’t.” You move out of his arms to turn off the stove, and smile, but it doesn’t really seem to reach your eyes. As your hands slide along your neck and shoulders, your posture stiffens, swaying softly on your feet— and Rin sucks his tongue. Those fucking blotchy marks come clear into view again, and they nag. They’re a sore sight, a few breaths away from nauseating.

He can’t help but think you wouldn’t ask the same question to the oldest.

To add insult to injury, you nuzzle into the soft edge of the shirt for comfort, in a way so awfully familiar it makes him feel ill. Why, why, why. His heart rate spikes as he stares at the floor instead. “You spent weeks in a hotel with Sae when he went to train.” It comes out a lot more accusatory than he had in mind, though he tries to hide the bitter tone in his voice. “Can’t be that different.”

“It is different.”

“-How is it any different? Because Sae will abuse your silence in a way that I don’t?” It’s so fucked. Rin knows full well that he isn’t innocent in this situation, not even close. But he hates the way you fist your hands into Sae’s shirt, how you cling to it like a lifeline— not even trying to cover the hickeys he seared into your neck the first second Rin wasn’t looking. Hates it so much that arguing rationally goes out the window. He wants you to love him as much as he loves you; because facing himself makes him sick. There’s nothing in the world more painful than knowing what he feels for you. So fully and deeply to his bone marrow, it squeezes his chest so tight the air barely reaches him.

“W- I just-” your eyes desperately dart around the kitchen for anything to say, “I love niichan, and he- he loves-”

“No, I love you, imouto! I’m the one who cares! He came here to use you and leave, and you’re asking me to pretend like I’m fucking stupid, or blind! I’m not here for you to feel better about being Sae nii’s play thing,” he snaps, having your eyes wide at the outburst, wringing his hands together in shame. Shame at needing to beg to want him, to care. Shame at longing for his own fucking blood in ways he shouldn’t. Shame at how fucking lesser than he feels. It builds and builds until his face feels hot, and Sae’s stupid fucking smug grin flashes in front of his eyes. He wants to tear his own hair out at it, but it wouldn’t even solve anything.

He can’t escape it, as long as he doesn’t have you as a guarantee. You, little, sweet you— stand there so disarmed, seeming so much younger than you are— tear-filled eyes and crossed arms. It’s the same look you’d get when Sae would goad you into stupid fights that you’d inevitably lose, or any time Rin would pretend to hate you as a kid. You almost seem to topple over with the force of the words, and Rin falls quiet. Your pitiful look is all that’s left in Pandora's box. “Don’t… don’t cry.”

Your bottom lip wobbles until your shoulders pathetically start to drop, like a kitten picked up by her neck, and you scrunch your face in a way he’s never had to see before— it shatters any composure he has left. “I can’t not…” your voice sinks to a whisper, a sad little whimper. “I don’t know- wh-how. I’m sorry, I don’t get you two. I don’t get it— I just can’t- have you leave me too. Don’t leave, nii nii.”

Silvery tracks run all over your cheeks, your chin, down your neck before you finally dare look at him again, and beg. “Please, I’ll do anything you want, I just- Can’t handle it if you leave- hck- Please, Rin. Anything you want, I just- don’t make me go without you too.”

Your hand hovers halfway between grabbing for him and falling short, as you cry- for him. For him to stay, and ask him to, for maybe the first time, give his feelings a chance. Selfishly, so fucking selfishly, it blossoms inside him with a prideful glow. It dismantles him and rebuilds him from the ground up all at once, has his heart beating out of control against the same rib cage that shouldered his guilt, before he manages to peel his tongue from the bottom of his mouth.

“I’m not going anywhere…” his voice manages, almost cracking along with the tremble in his hands as he places them on your sides, sliding to your waist.

The physical, emotional turmoil instantly ebbing away when you crash yourself into his chest, is almost sickening. It doesn’t matter though, not to him, not when he lifts you up into his embrace and your legs wrap around his waist, letting him rest his face against your throat and allowing you to burrow yourself into his arms. “I’m sorry. Your big brothers love you, I promise. I love you. I’m never leaving.” The way you cling to him gets tighter, as if forcefully anchoring you to his chest— and he takes it as space enough to nudge his face up into your view and brush noses in the process. He should feel more guilty. He knows Sae, and he knows you- and despite what the other man might think, Rin has no illusions of being a saint.

Rin knows that Sae told you whatever string of lies that stuck best, asked you to lay down under him and come undone, and you did so without a second thought. And though he hates that thought, it isn’t born out of the goodness of his heart. He wants you to be his, and only his. The brush of his face along yours makes you shiver, and softly shake your head- but he can’t help it. He can’t do you one better than Sae did. His lips hover yours, lashes fluttering under low lids as the salty taste of your tears gets between you. His hand raises to your neck, letting you arms and legs support yourself against him as he pulls you in, and whispers. “Kiss me back.”

The small, rounded window reflects back his own face against the dark sky, tipping the dark liquid around the glass in disinterest. First class feels awfully plain now, he almost laughs, sliding the glass along the bar. A pretty, blonde flight attendant passes by, swinging her hips as she tops up the other man’s glass with a smile and deposits another bottle by their sides. Sae doesn’t bother to look up as he fiddles with the fine chain in his pocket.

“Come on, prodigy boy… we’ve got two more hours to kill.” Michael’s small smirk grows when he tosses another few ice cubes into his glass, and tops himself up even further. “Don’t tell me you’re already tuckered out.” The chain slips between his fingers a little as he pulls it out— and lets out a long, pinched breath. Long lashes brush his cheeks as his eyes narrow, and the gold-plated necklace lands in his palm. He pops the small square open.

Even printed so small, your taste is mirrored back onto his tongue, and sets the hairs on his neck on end.

Michael barely gives him a momentary glance, before taking a sip, crossing his arms over his chest. “I didn’t know you were religious.”

“I’m not.” His thumb brushes ever so briefly over the face in the picture, before he snaps it closed again. And the white blond raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t ask, for once. Maybe he knows the answer won’t satisfy any of his curiosity. Doesn’t matter to Sae. The whites and oranges of the airplane make light spots in the layer of fog outside— and he raises the glass to his lips after all. He wants to groan and yell until he drowns out the noise. Maybe punch something too.

His life has been a string of unfortunate sacrifices… so why. Why is this one any different? The slightly sweet tone under the bourbon hits the back of his throat, and he rests his forehead on the cool bar in hopes of getting a clearer head. Instead of clearing anything, his thoughts start crawling to the forefront again. He thinks of the flow of your hair between his fingers, and the way you say his name. He doesn’t miss home. Doesn’t miss Japan. He just misses the warmth in his chest when he’s able to return to you. God, he hates his pitiful, sentimental crap.

He wonders if Rin’s finally made a move.

Your mouth is completely occupied as Rin crawls over you and slides a leg aside to fit his hips against yours— your hands sliding into his hair when you roll back your head with a soft squeak to catch your breath. “Rin, Rin- I don’t think we should- do this.”

Your clothes are discarded by his feet and your pliable body laid out before him as your legs brush his. He shivers as your breath brushes over his cheek, and makes him want to clench his eyes shut to escape it- but he can’t. Never could before, and it’s no different now. He’s entranced by the rise and fall of your chest even under your hands that keep the slightest sliver of modesty. Not like he hasn’t seen all of you before, right?

He allows for a few breaths before he needs to be back to your mouth, opening your lips with his and connecting tongues— and almost knocks teeth with yours in his excitement to get closer. Your tongue on his tastes so good, melting every warm, desperate feeling and slipping it down his throat. Now your palms go to grasp his waist instead, brushing over the exposed skin to squeeze. “Rin.” He’s barely clear headed enough to pull back to cast a glance at you, and he grunts out your name. His face moves to your tits instead, grabbing and licking at every inch of skin that he can, and you whimper. “St-Listen to me. I think- we can’t.”

He can’t listen. His mouth slots over your nipple to bite at it, and you go to grab a handful of his hair with desperate, flexing and unflexing hands. Your chest raises into his touch and the licking and sucking, and it sets everything in his head up in flames. You’re no longer the little sister he wanted to protect. Not when you’re withering in his lap and grinding yourself against him like a slut, begging with fluttering lashes for his cock to drive home. Fuck. “Rin nii~” you whine, your lips are puffy and glistening. “Hmph, listen~” Fuck fuck fuck, he wants to have you crying out his name until it’s carved into his brain.

“What?” he finally manages to breathe back, skipping his hand along your naked thigh. His heart is about to beat out of his chest with you under him, rocking the couch when he raises himself above you. But can you blame him? He’s never been so fucking hard in his life, unable to think of anything but the softness of your body under him, and the taste of you. He slides up to tilt you back more and lets his eyes fall to your naked body again. Maybe he should be used to it by now. Used to you. But everything about you makes his body feel like a balloon that’s about to pop— and he sucks his tongue, fighting the urge to drool over all of you. “What?” he repeats again, eyebrows raising.

Rin realizes a split second before you speak that he doesn’t want to know, sees it in the pitiful look of your half-lidded eyes. But you’re too honest for your own good. “I never told you- that niichan touched me. I’m sorry. I said that we couldn’t- but- but niichan didn’t listen to me. And now he doesn’t like me anymore.” Too fucking honest for your own good. His stupid, pretty little sister splayed out in his fucking lap. How naïve are you? Instead of any solid thoughts crossing his mind, his mouth simply falls open a sliver, and he stares. If he didn’t already believe you… he would probably laugh. “I know I did a bad thing. I’m sorry.” Your lip wobbles, and you pull his hand to your chest to cling onto him. His temperature reaches a boiling point, flushing his brain with red.

“It is bad.” He nudges your face up to his with a soft sigh, and then presses several kisses along your lips. “If you’re gonna do this with anyone, shouldn’t it be me?” He could say that he will regret the way you look up at him with a thousand stars in your eyes. But that would be a lie. He’s out of guilt. His spine tingles with longing, face hot, his cock and balls thumping. It’s impossible to think of anything else. He kisses you again, letting your moans and whimpers drown out anything else, and moves to sit onto the couch. Then he pulls back only to pat his lap, and raises a brow at you as you search his face with your eyes. “Sit here, on your big brother’s lap. Hurry.”

You only hesitate for a few seconds, before he asks a little more sternly, and has you moving. “Do you have any clue how badly I’ve wanted you? Every time I look at you, you look so fucking good. So soft and sexy.”

“Don’t say that stuff,” you squeak, but you don’t fight him.

“I always want you,” Rin simply continues, as you lay your legs on his strong thighs with a pout, “you get my cock so fucking hard, see?” You do see, licking your lips as you take a deep breath and your hips roll against him instinctively. Your hands thread together behind his head, and Rin’s gotta focus so fucking hard not to start fucking the plush of your thighs. “Open your mouth.” He grunts when sliding his long fingers over your tongue, collecting enough spit to coat his fingers.

While his cock bops impatiently against your stomach, he’s transfixed on the embarrassed look in your eyes, and your whimpers as he pulls back. Truly, he’d like to spend hours exploring. And another couple hours giving you back the pure torture you put him through for the last two years. But he can’t, not when his cock is brushing its flushed head all along the belly and smearing pre-cum all over you. “Normally I’d ask you to put your mouth on it,” he grunts, free hand sliding along your cheek and taking a handful of hair, “but you’d have to keep a mouth full of cum.”

“Niichan, don’t-” you whine again, humming when the tug on your hair lingers between painful and pleasurable, “don’t say that~”

He can’t help but grin, licking a long stripe up your chest to your neck, and placing sloppy kisses on the skin. “You don’t like knowing that your big brothers want to fuck you? That you’ve got me wrapped around your little finger?” You mewl when he leaves a bite on your soft skin, before moving his hands to your ass and sliding one down between your legs. Your pussy’s already dripping despite your protest, has him slipping two fingertips inside and curling his hand up into you. He can’t fucking resist. It eats him up from the inside, mouth corners again twitching up. “I think you do like it. I think your pussy’s all-” His fingers fuck up into the soft walls of you, “-fucking-” again and again, leaving you panting, “-mine.” He probably shouldn’t find so much glee in it.

“Mhph,” your fingers dig into his shoulders, and your bottom lip is squeezed between your teeth, before you lean down to kiss him. Soft, almost sweet kisses, if not for the way your body grinds back into his palm and you whine softly like an animal in heat. It’s so fucking cute. It has his cock pulsing as he takes a breath, and looks at the sloppy way you leave his hand.

“Move up,” he quickly mumbles, kissing you back once before your thighs rise and he wipes his fingers on your slicked up mound, then slotting them into his mouth. He can’t even resist moaning out a rumbly, gravelly call of your name before he grabs two hands of your ass and helps you up. “Fuck, you’re so-” everything. If anyone had ever told him he’d be this weak over another person, he would’ve laughed. “Gonna fill you up, finally, f-finally gonna feel your little cunt squeeze around me.” His forehead rests on your chest for a second, placing a few lazy kisses on your tits, before he looks up. And though you look awfully flushed, embarrassed and heated- with teary eyes and puffy, bitten lips- you still run a hand through his hair and along his neck.

Then he lines up and moves you down onto him, and the first touch is all he needs to start feeling cotton fill up his brain. Your pussy takes him so well, sliding inch by excruciating inch onto his cock, and whimpering every second of it— you look spent well before he slides you down the last bit and your walls clench around him hard enough to knock the air out of him. He never thought you that small, but the way you struggle to take him, shaking on your legs and letting out every mewled thought, is so fucking hot. He loves you. Rin’s a sister fucker, and he’s never felt so fucking good in his life.

“Oh, fuck. You’re so tight- t-tiny little pussy… Holy-fuck, ugh—” You’re so warm, and soft, and he can’t help himself. He’s pushing you over onto your back before he can think of it, and places both hands besides you. Wide shoulders cover your view until you’re forced to hang on as he pulls back and fucks back in hard.

The slaps that fill the house as he pumps his thick, heavy cock into you are a melodic dream, making you whine and moan and dig your fingers and nails into his back. “Rin niichan, ah, ah, ahhh- I love you- I love you— ah, l-love you~” He fucks into you without abandon, letting his cock fuck right into the soft, spongey part of your walls and filling you right up. The rhythm he sets is hard and deep, and shakes the couch around enough to hear it groan. But he’s lost in the way your body curls, and you lift your chest to his, head thrown back— and almost choke on your teary whimpers. “F-feels- so gud- ah, I- I’m sorry. Mom, dad, I’m sorry. I love my— big brother!”

It’s like a beast that his balls clap against your ass and his one hand finds purchase between you two to toy with your nipples as he pants. His balls ache, with every wet gush of slick that collects between your two bodies it drives him further into you, fucking the head of his cock deeper and more precicely into you. He can see his cock slide in and out through your belly. It’s vile- in a way that makes everything feel blank, pleasurable and tingling down his spine. “Can you rub your clit for me,” he breathes, and kisses you, sucking on your tongue when you oblige with shaky hands. “Uhuh, such a good little sister. The best- b-best fucking hole, ugh-fuck.”

“Nii nii, I’m close.”

He’s burning through you, losing himself in the pleasure of filling you up all the way as your fingers flit over your puffy clit like he knows you like. He could do it for you if he wasn’t so desperately trying to keep himself from blowing his load, feeling the muscles in his legs, back and shoulders flex as he chases that peak. “Gonna cum? You gonna cum?” Your rapid nodding, paired with the grinding of your hips and your back curling off the couch is enough to have him kissing your pouty lips again, and keeping that same exact punishing rhythm even as your pussy squeezes him tight enough to keep him in you— grunting. You’d be able to kill him here and he’d go happy. “Oh, fuck— so good, so fucking good-”

He can feel you fall over the edge before he sees it, and despite the best of efforts, cums together with you as you cling so hard to his shoulders you’ll leave marks. You cum on his cock as hot ropes of white fill up your clenching pussy, dripping a mess out of your shared orgasms as he shudders on top of you and only stills completely when your moaning goes into a pitched little whine, and then a deep breath of his name. “Rin nii~” you pout, rubbing your palms along his sides a few times. It looks like you want to say something, but can’t find the words, and it warms him from the inside out. But he pulls back a little, cock still awfully hard inside you, and his hand cups your cheek.

“Can you go again? I wanna go again.” Then his lips land on yours, pressing loving kisses all over your face, cheeks, your nose, and you let out a little giggle. “And again, and again, and again.” For the first time in a while, Rin finds himself completely, utterly happy. And not a single thought is out of place.

Sae’s staring up at the ceiling of his fancy apartment as he starfishes the bed, and the slow rings have him rolling onto his side. The phone beeps, before going into voicemail again. And he frowns. Your name blinks back at him as he pulls back, and the soft tone of your message rings through the device.

“Hey, I- you don’t normally miss calls… Must be pretty busy over there, huh? This is the third voicemail I’m leaving within two days.” He rights himself to stare out the window of his pristine Barcelona apartment, and runs a hand through his bangs with a click of his tongue. “I uh- I shouldn’t have left without a word. I was- well, I don’t know. I miss- you, I guess.” His air gets a little stuck in his throat, and needs a cough to get going. “Anyways, call me back when you hear this. Niichan’s gonna be playing in the World cup. Tell Rin to get his ass into the lineup already.”

And then, after a long breath, “tell him he kinda owes me.”

FIN

Thank you so much for reading my series to the end, i have so much love for these three and i will miss it and them :'>>

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tragedyofdevotion · 1 month ago

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The rin and sae fic was amazing! I just want to know what happened after. I mean how both sae and rin felt? What will happen if they see sae again?

I leave the series there because I kinda want to leave you guessing a little bit but,,, hmmm if I had to say

Rin’s sense of value really stems from being compared to Sae and beating him in some way, but when it comes to their imouto he really felt beat in every way and still loves her so much despite it. So I think now that he’s finally got her, there’s nothing he won’t do to keep her. Rin is really fucking bold when it comes to taking what he wants from his little sister.

The only limit really is what she’ll let him get away with!! If that’s sleeping in the same bed every night whispering her name or fucking her in shared showers or become her husband then that’s what he’ll do.

And Sae well,,, does feel regret over how things happened. Deep down he knows he was wrong and despite wanting to be, he knows he’s probably not the right person to keep you company. He doesn’t even really want to try to be. That’s Rin’s thing. Rin is the try hard, Sae just reaps the rewards. Even his little sister was all over him without really having to try and because He tried to do something nice by giving her to Rin, now he’s being punished for it.

Sae likes to think he can leave it at that and be a better niisan than he was (by maybe not fucking his little sister and then abandoning her right after). I think once the feeling of regret gets too strong he’ll come right back to softly manipulating her into his arms, and she’s soft and caring so she’ll probably want to just be with her two big brothers again.

But Rin is never ever gonna let that happen again.

When they see each other again little sister will probably have a ring on her finger with Rin wrapped around her back glaring daggers. He’ll just have to remind imouto of what Sae did to fuck it up. How he’s not like him, Rin loves her more than anything and he’d never leave her, but she can’t betray him, ever. She can’t leave. He won’t let her.

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tragedyofdevotion · 1 month ago

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Loving this very much

hii! can i make a request?

I've been thinking about angsty things a bit. say if, reader got pregnant, would she hate it? how would scara/childe react? in my opinion, id like to think that scara thinks of this as a way to tie her down to him more, plus its canon he likes kids!! and as for childe i think he'd be very very happy since he has soooo many siblings, (maybe he wants a lot of kids too??)

and..what if reader miscarried? i have this thought of where scara would still be cold to her but give her breaks and more space than usual, but what if reader completely locks herself in and then when he confronts her about it they get into a huge argument, how would scara tackle that, would he resort to abusive tactics and would it increase readers hatred & distance more?

just a brainrot, you dont have to write about it if you're not comfy^_^

This took me so so so long!! I'm so sorry if you were waiting for it!!

I don't typically write for things like pregnancy because it makes me uncomfortable, but I'd be lying if I said I do not absolutely fucking adore angst and hopelessness.

Parasite

Yandere! Scaramouche x Fem! Reader

Forced Marriage AU

TW: 18+ MDNI, Dark Content, Forced marriage, Pregnancy, Miscarriage, Mentions of Dub/Non-Con

A week late turned into two. Two turned into a month. A month turned into three. And three turned into unusual cravings for foods that didn't go together. Sickness and vomiting clouded the hours of your mornings. Dread filled your body the second you realized what this was. Stress makes your cycles late, you told yourself, stress makes your entire body change, and this was a stressful situation, but stress wasn't causing this, was it?

Scaramouche could tell the changes in you immediately. As someone who constantly kept tabs on your life, it was only fair to assume that he'd noticed your slight fluctuation in weight and lack of asking for your monthly cloths. When you were called into his office, you felt a hot flash all over your body, you assumed it was fear, but it could've also been nausea.

His office was a place filled with dread. The air in the room was too thick and worst of all, he was there. The room made you feel small, the only good thing about it was that he was usually too focused on his mile high stacks of paperwork. Except today. Today his razor sharp gaze was focused on your trembling form as you bowed to him, his eyes following down, then back up.

“Answer me honestly,” he began, hands planted on the wood in front of him, “Are you with child?”

If you could throw up again, you would. Of course, you knew all this time, but you never wanted to say it. You hoped, just hoped and prayed that maybe if you never acknowledged it, it would all go away. It would all be a bad dream. But it was true. There was something disgusting living inside you. And it was his.

“I believe so, my lord,” the words couldn't even completely fall from your lips before you were a blubbering, sobbing mess of anguish and fear. Despite the fact that you were completely breaking down before him, he had a small smile on his face, like he was proud of what he'd done to you.

“That's good,” he said calmly, wiping away your tears and planting a forced kiss upon your face. His touch felt cold as ice, but his hands against you made you want to melt your skin away.

The reaction to the “good news” was immediate, whether that was good or bad was up in the air, but everything changed. The tight obi of all the kimono you owned would put too much pressure on your budding stomach, new one's were ordered to be ready as you grew more in size. Your diet was changed completely, less of the Inazuma raw delicacies and more lean meat and vegetables. Daily classes of calligraphy and tea ceremonies were switched to resting with your feet up or light stretching, everything to keep you happy and healthy during your pregnancy.

The biggest change was Scaramouche himself. A man filled with so much hatred and disgust, was suddenly being kinder. Or trying to at least. You watch him open his mouth to make a comment, only to shut it again in favor of saying something still rude, but less insulting.

The Scaramouche that believed that he could take your body whenever he pleased was long gone, even though that was what got you in this predicament in the first place. He'd taken to leaving you in the middle of the night and going to the bathroom to sate his urges. He'd come back with cold damp hands and lay next to you, a protective hand over your stomach as he kissed your cheek and told you how much he loved you.

The day you saw blood between your legs and felt an aching pain in your stomach was a joyous one indeed. A part of you wanted to scream out in glee, but you didn't want to wake your already on edge husband. The blood that coated your fingers could only mean one thing. One good thing. It was gone. You were free of it. Almost immediately, the dark air that seemed to linger over your body vanished and you let out a sigh of relief.

Scaramouche was informed shortly before breakfast that same morning. You relayed the information to a maid, who then told him, whispering the words in his ear so quietly, it sounded like she was speaking gibberish. His face, his expression, changed to one shock, then horror, then pain. You didn't even know he could make such a face, yet there he was with tears in his eyes.

“Wh-what happened?” There was that tone again. The one you were used to. The anger and distaste for you in his voice. He slammed his fist down on the desk, turning his head away from you as his voice became high and breathy, so desperate for answers, “What did I do wrong?”

You stood in his office awkwardly, even this display from a person you hated, this display of agony was hurting you as well. You thought it would be funny. Seeing the man who pulled you from your home and forced you into marriage in pain was supposed to make you happy, but you felt your own chest clenching, felt your hands tremble.

“I-i suppose…I was stressed, my lord,” you muttered, his already labored breaths hitching at those words. The few months you were carrying that thing inside your body, was when he asked for less from you. He expected you to laze around all day and relax. For your body to fall into a daze like trance of naps and delicious food. He wanted happiness for both you and his child that you carried, yet you were still the most stressed you'd ever been in your entire life, knowing that he had something inside you. Something that would continue to fester and grow, until it eventually ate you alive.

He sat back in his office chair dejected, hurt, and empty. Scaramouche's normally sharp, glaring eyes were wide as he stared at the ceiling, body limp as he bit his lip, “Leave me,” he sighed, his voice barely above a whisper. Had it not been for the quietness of the room, you wouldn't have heard him.

Leave him you did, closing the door as silently as possible and not lingering behind. You felt yourself finally stop tensing, telling yourself that all your woes were over, for now. The thing was gone. You were happy. For once, even if unintentionally, you'd won over your captor.

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tragedyofdevotion · 1 month ago

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┌─ “ ! „ TWO OF CUPS .03.

tw. incest, dubcon, peeping, creampie, coercion/emotional manipulation, unintentional voyeurism, jealousy, angst, love triangle wordcount. 5k

part 01 part 02 part 03 part 04

a/n. she's hEREEE she's here the emotional baggage fuckery is back finally!!!! aaaaahhhh yes i finally got off my ass and rewrote and finished part three thanks you so much to @seijorhi and @darlingsanzu for betaing and sitting through my insufferableness about the itoshi sibs i juST ughhhhh!! i hope you like it and yes there will be a part four which should be the final part and yes i will try tofinish it soon-ish <333

itoshi rin x fem!reader x itoshi sae

The picture is a little creased, faded with time, but it’s still visible enough to keep. It’s more valuable than a digital copy, in this case. Because there’s an obvious scratch right over Sae’s perfect smile that gives Rin every reason to want to grin back. At least the wear and tear of the universe is on his side this once. You’re adorable in your matching jersey, little toddler hands sticking out of the arm holes as you’ve wrapped yourself around an equally small him.

Nostalgia isn’t a feeling he wants to linger in much though, because even on an innocent reflection of the past like this one - where Sae is throwing up peace signs and dribbling a ball as the two of you watch enchanted - there’s a treacherous truth displayed.

As he’s holding you, his only baby sister, in his arms, he stares at the ball; the talent, the glory, the unequivocal challenge, and you; you’re watching Sae.

It’s how it's always been, and with a bitter swallow, Rin has to wonder if the way he always trailed two steps behind will be how it ends. If he can’t keep you, if Sae really does take him up on the threat to steal you away from under his nose, would you struggle? Would you even understand if he explained it? Somehow, he doubts it. Somehow, he thinks that you don’t see anything wrong with the fact that you whisper Sae’s name in your sleep.

No simple scratch over Sae’s smile on a childhood picture is going to stop you from loving the guy. And worse still, it isn’t even his picture. It only reappeared in the house when Sae came home to stay with you, creased, cherished, and though Rin isn’t sure if Sae is even capable of true feeling for anything that isn’t himself… it looks loved.

A better man would take that as a sign to back off, maybe. A better man wouldn’t drag his little sister out of a shared bed and strip you down to nothing, pretending to be a helping hand. Kiss your lips, play with your fingers until you give him the first real smile of the day. Hopeful, and deeply, truly forgiving of his every flaw. It’s everything he isn’t. Instead he is towered over you with one hand on the granite tiles with his body just a few breaths from yours as you hum a little song. The showerhead is big enough to have you drenched, and him close enough to have the steam and heat of the water drawing random swirls along his vision, breathing in, breathing out. The heat of the air clears his lungs, but nothing takes the sticky, pressing feeling on his chest away when you’re this close. Breathe in, halfway out as you clear your voice.

“Do you think Sae will be allowed to stay a little longer, nii nii? I know he’s gotta practice, but—” The sound of the shower drums away the rest of your question. Water runs from your neck, along shoulder blades down the line of your back, and he wants to groan and grunt at the way your butt almost brushes his fucking cock. It’s ungodly. It’s vile, and maybe if you were any less trusting, you could feel the way his eyes roam when you tell yourself ‘no looking’, or how his waist ‘accidentally’ brushes up against you almost every time. You’re none the wiser, though, that’s the problem. “Rin nii?” He looks up from your steamy, perfect fucking body that’s chubbing up his cock to lean his chest against your shoulder as he grabs the shampoo bottle, and gives a faint hum to signal hearing you.

“It’s just been so long since we were all together again,” you breathe then, and hum so softly, encouragingly, as his long fingers find your head to slosh the artificial fruit scent around your scalp. Another little noise has his lashes fluttering, sliding his other hand down your neck to take a solid hold of your shoulder. And then a puffed breath, as you turn halfway towards him and make him catch a flash of your perfect fucking tits, to make matters even worse. Truly, you must believe him to be a saint, he thinks as all his muscles flex and unflex. He’s so wound up with Sae being around to ruin it that he can barely stand looking at you without wanting to grab his cock and pull until he sprays cum all over the swell of your ass. “Ahh, that feels- ah- really good.” He can’t help it. Nothing makes the longing go away.

“Thank you for taking care of me, niichan… I- I don’t like being alone.”

Dead silence. He needs dead silence to get over your unapologetic admiration. To be locked up in solitary confinement and have a metal rod jammed through both ears, probably. Rin swallows the thick feeling on his tongue to the best of his ability, watching the soap run down your hair, before ever so gently leaning in to press a kiss to your cheek. And one to your jaw, and neck, and then the crook of your shoulder. Forget about anything else, his brain blares, forget about — his voice cracks when he calls your name and wraps a lone arm around your stomach to stop you from moving. “You know I love you, right?”

You seem similarly frozen in time for a few tense heartbeats, water rushing along your face and making every inch of you glitter under the lights. Before you wipe your eyes and nose, and nod. “I know. I love you too, nii nii.”

Your lashes are dark, long, and too wet. And your lip bobs up and down a few times as you go to smooth your hands down his chest, and Rin can’t fucking help it— think that you’re looking through him. There’s a commotion outside the hall before the way you look at him can be addressed. The door creaks as it opens, before footsteps make their way to the bathroom and there’s a little knock. Sae’s voice is low and sleep filled as he calls out your name, and you pull your hands away from Rin. Leaving your touch to burn long after it’s gone.

“Are you in the shower?”

“Mhm, I’m almost done.” He doesn’t want to look at the way you fidget, and draws his hand back from it’s steady position on your hip to grab some soap.

Sae’s irritating mockery of a voice is strangely gentle when speaking to you, and he imagines his brother leaning against the door as he talks. “That’s okay. Want me to join you?” Rin almost chokes on it. You don’t hesitate to hum, and play your fingers along your hand palm.

“If you want to. Rin’s in here too, so there’s not that much room, but-” The sharp snort from beyond the door cuts you off, but Rin would overlook that any day if Sae would just keep his damn mouth shut. As if he’d ever be that lucky.

“Ah, I was wondering where you went. You’re showering with our little sister? Fucking pervert.” The cold laugh only makes his eyebrows lace together harder, as his jaw clenches hard. The irony is lost on you, of course, because you look at Rin with a little head tilt. And try to shy away from him when he grabs your hand to lace it together. “Well, let me know when you’re done. I need to head to the store later and I wanna shower first. Hurry it up.”

Adrenaline pumps through his blood as he wipes some of the sweat of his brow. The short blades of grass crunch under his feet, and the ball flies - as usual - in a perfect arch towards the one corner of the goalpost, heading home. The field’s otherwise abandoned, and the cold sky makes his puffs of hot breathing into little clouds that linger before fizzling into nothing.

Only the bright white of large led lights, and to the side, you. You’re buried in his jacket, hands deeply hidden into the oversized pockets as you walk from the boundary lines towards him. “Nii nii!” Your voice bounces around the space overzealous, and it warms his face instinctively. It’s entirely too domestic. As he leaves the spare balls to jog up to you, his stomach flips. It’s down season, so really, this should be his rest time. But he’s been… unusually agitated, for lack of any better way to describe it. Days seem longer when he can’t even get close to you without receiving a sneer or a disbelieving chuckle from some corner of the house.

Your shared house, of just you and him. Sae doesn’t care nearly enough about what should be the consequences if it were anyone else. He could just kick him out, if it were different. But sadly, you’re not anyone else, and you’d sooner bend yourself into impossible shapes than willfully ask your other brother away. It’s not like he’s being more distant for the redhead’s sake. No, he wants to let out a dry chuckle at the idea, anything but. If it was up to just him, he’d let Sae rot in his sourness and implications. It’s only out of necessity, because you care about what Sae thinks of you. And the guy fucking knows it.

Rin instead takes in with a tiny smile how you’re dressed entirely in his clothing, like you’re some cheesy couple, unwilling to be separate people from one another for even a second. It calms the possessiveness enough to pull you into him when you reach him, two hands full of ass as he makes you wrap your arms around his neck and picks you up against his sweaty body. “Mhm, you look cozy.”

Your mouth quirks up before you giggle, and let him bury his face into the side of yours.

He kisses you, leaning down into it before you can say another word, and you giggle an embarrassed little ‘Rin’ into his lips before pulling away. But his large hands are still holding you off of the floor and forcing you into another hug, and you don’t struggle much against it anyway. He should really be more embarrassed. About the way his lips long to slot over your pulse point and bathe you in possessive kisses that leave the deepest marks. After just a few kisses along your neck you pull back and mumble something about the tickling, and then land back onto the ground when he puts you down.

It’s second nature for you to attach yourself to Rin’s body when looking up at him and to wrap your arms around his waist, and in turn, he does his best to keep his eyes from wandering too much. “It’s cold, why’re you out here? Watch niisan play?” Your fingers squeeze before you breathe, and your smile slips just a little. Obvious.

And whatever sort of look must come over his face has you grabbing him a little tighter, keeping the hug going. He doesn’t want to think about the millions of times he’s demanded it with so much unveiled disdain that you’re always trying to soothe him. He doesn’t want to think it, but for some reason- it still pops up into the back of his head. You nuzzle into his chest, hope the warmth in your eyes sinks down into his bones. But the moment can’t last, and you eventually open your mouth to let out a slow mumble. “Sae nii wants to take me to some new bar in Kabukicho. I’ll be back soon though.”

Though his mouth tugs down, he lets out a hum, and a dry, non-amused chuckle follows. “Yeah. Do whatever. Sae’s only here every so often, right?” He turns to get away from the way your face falls, unable to help it. Rin rolls his tongue around against the roof of his mouth. Like taffy, the jealousy sits in his mouth and sours a little further each time he swallows. It’s a special kind of torture.

You try to help it, as always, sewing the tearing edges together as best you can. But it’s no use. As long as Sae keeps winning, Rin will keep fighting back. That’s just the way of things in the Itoshi household. “You can come with us, nii nii,” you pout into the dusty clouds of breath that covers your face in fog. But the noiret stands fast. Pride is an ugly thing when it gets broken. It now winks at him each time he walks around in his own house. Try as he might, he can’t escape you. And though your eyes might flick towards the eldest for guidance, he knows it’s only a matter of time before Sae runs ahead again and leaves you stranded in his wake.

From somewhere on the parking lot, an expensive car roars and flashes it’s lights to call for attention. Your shoulders square as you hide yourself further into his puffer jacket, and your long lashes seem to plead with him. “Rin nii?”

“I have to practice,” he mumbles back, and drops the ball onto the curve of his foot to set it into another long arch across the field— anything to keep himself from having to look at your face as it falls. “Get home safe.” You take a shuddered, little breath, before your shoulders fall and you turn to make your way back to the sideline and past it. He feels bad, sort of, but tonight is a little rough.

He wants to just play out here until his toes and fingers go numb. He doesn’t want to see how your eyes shine when Sae gives you a sliver of attention, when his own betray him as a man who spent most of his life loving you. Surely he has more self respect than that.

There was always something selfish about it. About the way he would run ahead, hogged toys and attention, and cherished himself. A greedy, unrelenting draw towards success, whatever that even meant when he was 6 and beating everyone around him in athletics and running them off his tail faster than people could wish to admit. A monster of ‘natural talent’ that called his name from the quiet confines of the spotlight, and for good reason, he was more than glad to shake hands and let it run wild upon his life. That selfishness wouldn’t be pushed aside for anything. Or anyone.

It was only an unfortunate consequence that you and Rin had to come after. Sae didn’t start out trying to antagonize anyone. Despite that — time changes things. Fractures once familiar memories. Unties knots. He might have started out not trying to antagonize Rin, but he isn’t stupid. Sometimes it feels like that’s all they’re good for now. If not for you. Their smallest, trying to glue the shards back together again and again and over again.

It was always that way. Their little fixer, their little cheerleader. The favorite bench warmer, or something like that. Rin sets alight at the core when he looks at you, and he’s not exactly good at hiding it. The only reason your parents didn’t see it was a plea of sanity, and a little bit of delusion. How do you make peace with the fact that not one, but all of your children have crossed opposing wires in their brain? That your pedestal-raised, untamed prizes of offspring have taken to tying the last remaining semblance of normalcy to their own side with diamond chains. It’s only a matter of time before one of the chains gives out, and the perfect, little family shatters.

The fan buzzes with a soft hum that has him glancing over his shoulder at the side of your face, cheeks soft and long lashes hiding admiring, unrelenting hope in your eyes each time they find him. No, Sae isn’t stupid. He knows that you call him much more often than you’re willing to tell Rin about, and that you like it a little too much when his hand slides down your spine to pull you into him. He knows that you don’t just look at him with a platonic appreciation. And that it’s as much his fault for letting it get this far as it is yours for pining for something that wasn’t meant to be yours. But that’s what happens when big brother becomes an unattainable standard that parents set, isn’t it? You find ways to close the gap.

Your unconscious way of closing the gap is to place yourself on the edge of his bed and talk, talk until you can’t talk a second longer. Usually until he shuts you up by wrapping his arms around you and kissing you until you run out of air in your lungs to make it a second longer. That’s how it started, all those years ago. A sleepless night of sudden, self-shattering doubt, where he’d snuck across the hall in the comfort of twilight. And settled for a soft, misguided kiss; just to prove he could.

And you being you, had looked at him with those big, clueless doe eyes and hadn’t peeped a word about it— because who are you if not undyingly loyal to the worst of the worst. Sae doesn’t get it. But it seems he is, at heart, exploitative by nature, right? Why else would one kiss have turned into two, and then many, stuffing his insecurities deep within his little sister until she breaks first.

Your cheek is rolled against the couch now, and your legs tucked close against him as he watches a rerun of another old match, but it seems that tonight, something’s different. Ever since he stole you away from Rin yesterday, the guy’s been unapologetically standoffish. And now you’re unusually quiet. Or, not so much unusual as uncomfortable, and making it unable to ignore it. Sulking and sniffling in the crook of your elbow with all the poise of a third grader.

His face turns to regard you, and he clicks his tongue. “What’s the problem?”

You don’t speak for a moment, but eventually have to give in to the unfailing stare burning a hole between your brows. Voice soft as it lays open the groundwork, and suddenly Sae’s throat closes up. “I miss Rin nii.”

The house is too quiet.

The thumping of the headboard is sort of unbearable. Cold and cruel and too noisy even for him, but it’s nothing compared to the thrill he feels singing into his blood as your eyes are closed tight, cheeks and ears burning with heat, and tears suffocating most of your cries for the low, clueless way you mumble his name. In some ways, he had wanted to do things differently. If it had been possible to contain his temper for once in his life, maybe he would have liked to try to make you happy with a gentle kiss and an even softer admission of guilt.

Apologized for fucking you up the way he did. Take responsibility.

The way he’s got both your wrists in one hand and his other on your throat isn’t gentle or soft. But Sae isn’t exactly one to look a gift horse in the mouth either. Your thick pearls of tears down your temples are enough to have him gritting his teeth and letting his hips connect yet again with the skin of your ass as he slots himself right between your legs. “Niichan, Sae niichan~” you whine out so pitifully below him, gasping and squirming and grabbing at his shoulders.

He grunts. “I don’t want to hear it.” You look like you’re not sure whether to beg him to get closer, deeper- or to drag your nails down his face- and the look has him biting his bottom lip so hard it soon tastes only of copper. Eventually though, a thought makes it through the squeezed opening of his throat, and he grabs your face to aim it at him. “You got some fucking nerve. It— Rin didn’t care about you until he realized that I wanted you. I was the one who cared first. Me.” He doesn’t recognize his own voice as it comes out raspy and only interrupted by his own hysterical heartbeat, and he stares deep into your matching irises again. “Me. Say it.”

Your mouth twists into a thin line, wobbly as his cock slides between soft lips and makes the wetness squelch between your bodies. His sweat beads at his hairline, and your nails dig deeper into his shoulder. He ruts himself deep, with a steady rhythm that rings through the house and makes your legs shake. Eventually you crack a little when he pries your chin from the way you hide it into your shoulder, and kisses you hard. He means it though, through teeth and spit all the same. “Sae nii- iichan,” your voice breaks when you mumble it, and a trail of silver runs along your temple. You still try to pull out of his white knuckled grip, pouting. “I don- I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. I just meant that- I- didn’t want to m-make -hick- Rin nii upset. Let go of me.”

“Why should I?”

He holds his steady thrusting for just a moment to regard you seriously, and watch the way the heat in your face swirls all around. Lips plump and parted, sweetened by his mouth. Skin sticky, your pussy leaving glimmering slick all over his thumping cock. You don’t say anything, and he moves instead to rub your puffy clit under his thumb with too much precision. It makes you squirm, and makes you pant and whimper. You don’t like to face the facts, don't like it when he calls you out for it. But as much as you can’t tell him no with his hands on your body and your tits in his mouth, he wants to hear you say he’s the favorite sibling.

His voice is a little gravelly still when you whine his name and he shuts you up by burying his cock to the hilt into the hot clutch of your tight cunt, and licking along your tongue. “You love me. I know you do.” It’s about the one thing he knows for sure about you. His neck burns when your hand slides along it to tug through the shorter hair, and whine against his mouth and nod.

“I love you, Sae niichan. L-love -y-you.”

With a short chuckle he pulls back, eyes wide and feeling a little too hysterical, just as fired up as he is on the field. Maybe even more. You’d deserve that much. His throat is dry as he slides the head of his cock against that spongy part of your walls and when your eyes flutter hard, grabs your tits too. Your knees land by your shoulders as his balls clap against your ass and you look so pathetically at his mercy, a little sister cunt just for him. Your crystal tears roll over in bunches, as he jackhammers his fat, hot cock into you. Until your eyes roll and your toes start curling into the blankets. Only then does he allow for the way you clamp at him to get pulled a little tighter, a little softer.

“Cumming? You’re big brother’s favorite girl, mhm-” he grunts, red hair sticking to his forehead, as he leans into the embrace just enough to fuck with heavy thrusts into the tightness of your hot pussy until it starts spasming around you. “Best -f-fucking pussy around. No one does it like you, ‘mouto.” He only notices there’s a tear when it tickles his collarbone on the way down, and no, no— he’s not crying over this. Not as you stare up at him through almost closed eyes with a hung universe in your eyes. Fuck. He hides his face into yours by crashing his lips to yours and letting his tongue swallow all of your moans and noises until you start really shaking, and clamping your legs around his body.

You cum with Sae’s tongue down your throat, and his arms burn as he lifts himself up from your body to fuck though the incredible feeling of you clenching down on him hard enough to black him out. It hurts how good you feel, before his hips automatically speed up with each noisy ‘pap’ to chase his own orgasm. “Niichan, niichan, y-you c-,” you break yourself off with a high pitched aftershock, and tug at the hair still locked between your fingers, “feels- so- g-gud- niichan!

“F-fuck, I-ugh.” His cock is so hot as he spills white ropes of cum into your dripping pussy before he even has a chance to think about it, pulling out halfway to spurt the rest of it between your legs with a rasped swear, before collapsing to your side and beaming in the sticky heat of the room. “Holy fuck.” Your arms wrap around his stomach and you bury your face into his side, and for a moment, he even allows his arm to wrap back around your shoulders. Because you’re good. You’re so good to him.

He doesn’t know how long you lay with him, but eventually the shallow breathing and soft touches cool, and when they do— he feels numb. The hot-headedness is gone. And with it comes the ice-cold realization that he’s gone and done it now. Your cheeks are still warm against his chest, and you shiver a little when he sits up. He hums. “Y'kno, this is a pretty nice guest room, but I’m kinda missing my own bed.”

A small frown digs itself between your brows on your pretty face. Your hands go for the blankets first, cover yourself up a little, and then you follow the way he sits up to shake off some of the daze. And his heart beats hard, too hard, when he slides off the side and your unsure look turns into a pout. “Sae nii. I-”

“Help me find my boxers.” The clamminess of the room is too fucking much, you have to understand that. The soft shuffle isn’t enough to ignore the way you’re burning holes into his skin. So he shrugs it off and picks a new pair out of the dresser instead, putting it on. And for a moment it works. Pulling on a shirt, sweater and some sweatpants is enough to clear his head just enough to toss you a bottle of water. You don’t catch it, and it lands with a sad poof on the soft covers.

But it’s nothing compared to the way you ruffle the softness even closer to your body, and your voice is barely a breath as you bite your tongue. “Sae nii?”

A dark room has never felt so revealing. He adjusts the sleeves of his sweater, giving a sideways glance to the crown of your head. Any lower he can’t stomach. “I’m heading home,” his voice comes out dry, as he opens the door to the hall, and heads straight for the car keys.

Rin doesn’t say anything when the door of your room opens, but he’s awake. 03:25— the blue light informs, and he slowly manages to pull one of the headphones out by its cord. Your small shape curls into bed like a fawn, slow and unsteady, and you breathe his name. But it isn’t the same, and it only takes a few seconds for him to feel, as well as see, how you nuzzle up half onto him. You’re cold, and your hands shake a little when you look into his eyes and go to melt your foreheads together.

In any other situation, he would think he was dreaming. Cross my heart and hope to not to wake, lucid in love. In any other situation, you wouldn’t be up halfway through twilight as you go in mouth first to his own and kiss him hard and deep enough for him to feel your heartbeat. Your lips are sweet though, and your one hand wraps thumb and fingers all along his shoulder, and squeezes until you shake. You push your tongue into his mouth as Rin’s eyes blink away the darkness, and his tongue brushes yours. It’s wet and hot and too real, your free hand going to find his where it rests on his chest, and you drape your leg over the rest of his body.

And he floats. Shakes, with tongue against tongue and your mouth slotted against his when you moan into it. This isn’t how you kiss him. This surges through his blood like poison, and has him humming back and pulling you further on top of him until you stop shaking so hard.

Your nose and lashes are wet, but you kiss him full of sugar and leave every inch of him in ambers. Rin allows you to curl up on his chest like you need, and links fingers with you, as he kisses down your mouth and neck as you gasp and pant and shiver like a bunny. Shoves his hands under Sae’s spare shirt to drag his long fingers along your spine, and you cry, and you cry, and you cry.

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