tower726

[tower726]

The Excavation

The roar of the Prism Falls was everywhere in the valley. Black water rushed over the cliff to pour into the gorge below, casting the permanent rainbow that gave the waterfall its name. The river is old, and has cut a deep swath through the hills--in some places, the riverbed is so steep and the shadows so deep that winter ice never melts. On a rock beneath the falls, there is an altar stylized like a fish, with a keyhole in it. Sitting in front of it with a look of intense concentration and even more intense hatred is a young man. There are a pile of broken and twisted keys on a table beside him. The real key is on display in the gift shop near the parking lot--broken in half. Three months of planning had gone into making new keys. He’d had to try out five tooth arrangements. But as soon as you tried to put a false key into the statue, the fish’s jaws would clamp shut in a way that made you count all your fingers. The last time he’d counted, he’d had one extra, but they’d managed to get the poor junior Burglar’s fingers sewn back on in time, and they’d stopped trying to pick the locks. Local legend held that the altar, once unlocked, would divert the river and reveal the Prism Dungeon. The legend was not clear on what was in the Prism Dungeon. It might be a hoard of treasure or a horde of monsters. One compelling local myth was that it held Torricello’s Bugle, which can play the world’s dirge. But Nebd was more interested in seeing what was in the dungeon mechanically. He wanted to see how the key diverted the river. There were five waterfall diverters upstream. One had been flooded by dam construction, another seen its tributary run dry. One was stuck in the divert position, another was broken and partially washed downstream. And he was not allowed to excavate even one of them unless he could prove the altar opened things. There’d be no funding to dredge the river for the mechanism.and he was certain he’d be put back into the Registrar’s office as punishment. He had one more key. One more chance. He exhaled slowly, and then inserted the key.

[tower726]

i think more haunted houses should have haunted clawfoot bathtubs that move and exist as separate, distinct demonically possessed entities 

[tower726]

Jupiter and Venus: The Kids on the Trains

Jupiter is a conductor. He drives the No7 Passenger Train (Blue) from Raspberry Farm to Sunbeam Central Station. Jupiter loves driving the train. The countryside whips past his engine in a blur, and he loves greeting the passengers, hearing their stories, and sometimes, getting two sandwiches in a lunch bag from his favorite passenger, Grandpa Theseus. Venus is an engineer. She drives the purple Cargo Train across the prairie, from the Pine Camps in the north, and the River Valley dairies, to the Sunbeam Intermodal Exchange, where they’re unloaded, put onto semi trucks, and shipped out into the wide world. She loves knowing her place in the ticking machine of commerce, and every day she buys two bottles of Jamjam Blue Label Chocolate Milk from the Anning Dairy. Every day, Jupiter and Venus meet at their table at Cafe Too Lait. Jupiter gives Venus one of his sandwiches, because sharing is caring. And Venus gives Jupiter one of her bottles of milk, because sharing is caring. Then they discuss the exciting things and people they hauled in their trains, and plan where they’ll go on their days off. Jupiter and Venus live their lives in an orbit around the Sunshine Central Station. They’re watching the Solar Bell. The sundials that give Sunbeam Central Station its name have agreed it’s noon, and the bellringer is playing the carillon. Jupiter checks his gold pocketwatch. Venus has rolled up her sleeves to check a row of wristwatches. They exchange glances, and Jupiter winds his watch.

“It was slow.” he explains.  Venus is glowering at her wristwatches. “No, the main bell was fast. We have time.” Jupiter nods. His sister keeps better time than him. Cargo didn’t complain if you were late, but passengers did. So he was always setting his watch forward, to get an early start, and then forgetting. Venus was convinced the sun was getting to noon later on purpose.

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His phone buzzed. He ignored it. Buzz.

He’d trained a chat bot on every text she’d ever sent him.

Buzz.

Every message they’d ever shared.

Buzz.

She’d told him she was traveling, and she couldn’t wait to see him again.

Buzz.

That she’d see him soon.

Ding-dong.

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The Springhorse crunched the apple thoughtfully. It occurred to her that this human needed a ride. Possibly back wherever he'd gotten this apple. He probably had more apples, sacks full, even. He was probably worried sick about his apples. They probably desperately needed eating by hungry springhorses.

[tower726]

“Why would I do that?” “You mean you wouldn’t kill Baby Hitler?” “I mean, why does he have to be a baby?” “Couldn’t I just kill’m when he’s like, 32?”

[tower726]

Tazmond sat for a moment, his vest unbuttoned, his eyes unfocused... then tilted his drink at the coyote. "I know what it's like, you know."

The coyote didn't respond. "Chasing, but never being chased."

The coyote was watching its prey. "Hey, no, he's never going to love you back. Don't strap that rocket to your feet."

[tower726]

“There is a prophecy. A great hero shall arise to save us in our moment of need!” They raised their hands up to indicate a mural. It was quite a good one. An adaptation of the original mural in the courtyard outside. It had taken the Sage of Insight months. Picnic Pete stared at the mural. “That’s not me. I’m just looking for a place to have a picnic. But, tell you what. As long as I’m around, I’m happy to help!”

      The sages shifted, a bit embarrassed. They’d been reading the prophecy for their whole lives, and had very definite ideas about who the hero would be, and he was NOT wearing a shirt with flowers dyed on.

 They had pictured a grimly determined knight, wearing a rainsoaked gray green cloak over gray blue armor. In some of the more flamboyant visions, his armor might be allowed a frippery of desaturated red decoration, provided there was lots of mud and stains.   But this fellow wasn’t wearing any armor at all! And he was smiling! Not even a smirk, or a cocky grin, but sincerely smiling! He was happy to be there, and having a wonderful time. The Sage of Fire saw an opportunity, and took it.  “Yes. Certainly, the True Hero will be along shortly.” he began, and glanced meaningfully at the Sage of Light. “But until then, it would be a great help if you sort of, lay the way for him.” she continued cautiously.  “Hold the sword until he gets here?” suggested the Sage of the Earth. The Guardian of the Temple of Earth collapsed heavily behind him, and he looked at the sword. “It’s a bit big to cut sandwiches.” he said doubtfully.

[tower726]

Mortuary

The exorcists looked around the mortuary. There were big, fluffy white pillows and brilliant lamps, and a small woman with gray skin was struggling with a harp.The mortician leaned over. “She’s a zombie. She woke up here and decided this was the Heaven she was promised. So she's decided to stay here."He surreptitiously kicked a pillow. "These were all her idea. She felt the place was a tad... grubby." There was a tuneless twang of the harp, and he shuddered hopelessly.

[tower726]

4 Dimensional

He was 4-dimensional, and was not bothered at all that nobody else seemed to be. If he gave you an order, he expected you to have arranged to do it in the past, before he noticed Obeying the laws of causality was simple laziness, and could be solved with a bit of damn discipline

[tower726]

Tower727 is live

[tower726]

“See those bird? It’s the last two jade-beak woodpeckers anywhere in the world.” The Birdwatcher nods solemnly as he lowers his binoculars. “They escaped from the lab. It took me six years. This ends today.” He raises his rifle.

[tower726]

Tower727 will broadcasting properly soon

[tower726]

“That’s the Kingdom of Transbergia! They say the bridge is guarded by a one-man army!”

This was true, although this was mostly because Kevin’s recruitment campaign had ended when he had to draw the pamphlets by hand and he’d gotten bored.

[tower726]

Artifact: Batwool Boots

Warm boots which allow the wearer to walk on ceilings.

These are useful mainly to ocean-liner passengers and roommates in city apartments who need extra space

[tower726]

She loved the library, although it filled her with dread. The card catalog was something of a to-do list that grew longer with every triumph of the Department of Collections.

[tower726]

"I hadn't considered taste." The lich sighs. "I miss flavors."