torilovelace
ToriLoveAmaya
Oh you know, I'm working on it.
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need me a girl wit a big ol thiq mind
fat ass cerebellum
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“Maybe that’s worse, not letting ourselves be loved. Because we’re too afraid of giving ourselves to someone we might lose.”
—
Mitch Albom
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Self exploration
God this journey is some shit man. The inner workings of my brain and the random seconds of clarity that allow me to see things I’ve been doing wrong suck. It’s like the reality in my head isn’t the same reality as everyone else’s and the world I’m living in was made for others not myself. I feel like I have to start over with learning how to be a person. I thought I was better but the sad reality is that I was just doing better. I’m far away from good or anything resembling normal. I have been trying to comb through all of my interactions and relationships to see what I’m doing that’s messing everything up and it’s always after I’ve learned something that I can see in what ways I was wrong but what I really need are the people in my life to help me see where I’m not healthy so I can change them. But I need them to be kind as I’m really trying and to not leave me and to be open and honest about the things I do because trust me hurting people is the last thing I want but I can’t stop something I don’t understand. I’m so stubborn sometimes but if someone took the time to be gentle with me and help me see things from different perspectives I think that would be the most kind thing anyone has ever done for me.
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