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It's supposed to be a crew rowing boat.

9"×12"

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first day coaching on the water and literally everything that could go wrong did go wrong but everyone lived and wednesday will be better. my launch wouldn’t start, boat had problems, lineup was super unbalanced. i also cut the shit out of my finger :p

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A post shared by Kent Thomas, MSW (@kentthomasmsw)

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Stormy Crossing on the Fjord by Hans Andreas Dahl

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took out a double for the first time this season and OH BOY. it was pissing it down the whole time and the girl in stroke had never been out in a double before. she did fine but i could not see where we were going like. 90% of the time. my coach would yell “something ahead, stay to the center” or “stay to the shore” and i would just have to trust him and hope i missed the giant murder logs. i literally could not feel my toes by the end of practice i was so wet.

anyways it was well worth it i missed being on the water. weekday weather looking bad so back to the cave :(

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all i can think about is rowing and over the summer i binged jacob geller videos and i watched his sekiro video and i can’t get something he said out of my mind.

“it’s a game that presents you with a seemingly insurmountable brick wall and tells you that you can in fact surmount it. not by out leveling it, but by getting to know the brick wall so intimately, understanding it so perfectly, that eventually the wall will feel like an old friend. at the end your knuckles may be bloody and your shoulder may be bruised but you’ll realize that the wall has opened a door to you specifically, and you can walk through. the brick wall of difficulty won’t be limiting, it will be liberating.”

i can’t out level a test piece. nothing i eat or don’t eat, no workout, no mental prep is going to let me pr on a test. the only way is to find that wall. find it in every piece i do. dont even have to break it every time. just find it and sit up there right at the edge. and on test day all of the sudden right where i remember it, 1200 meters in, there is a door. a 30 second pr, 15 seconds, 12 seconds, 5, 2. i can keep pushing the wall back.

i used to be so afraid of test pieces because i’d hit the wall and back down. before last year i’d quit more 2ks than i had pr’d. i’d start over because id psych myself out. i had to learn the hard way to never back down from the wall, never turn away. you don’t make progress that way. even if i can’t beat it today i will not run from it.

the wall will still be there tomorrow but so will i.