tittytheif

[tittytheif]

Hey, no homo, but I am sitting on the broken swing set out back in the perfect, quiet, 2:00am blackness and picturing the softness of your voice and the darkness of your eyes with such perfect and terrible clarity that it feels like I'm choking on my own heartbeat.

[tittytheif]

coworker: hey you should come look at the results of a ph test for a customer’s water

me: I’m king of busy rn

coworker: no really just come here

the ph test:

my honest reaction:

[tittytheif]

sorry im autistic and my special interest is forcefem

[tittytheif]

imagine if your boyfriend was like I can smell an ant. and started tracking

[tittytheif]

[tittytheif]

its so fucked up that people living in the year 1337 didnt even know

[tittytheif]

[tittytheif]

[tittytheif]

does anyone have any money recommendations. ive heard good things about one million dollars but it must be lost media or something because i cant get ahold of it to save my life

[tittytheif]

[tittytheif]

[tittytheif]

wanted to share my favorite reddit post ever

[tittytheif]

First off, click here.

The wheel just assigned you one of the Worldwide Box Office Winners from the past 35 years. (No 2024 because we don't know that winner, yet.)

[tittytheif]

made some versions of the agony grip for my friends for when the whole gang gets it . including different levels depending on the anguish

and a joyous one for when there is love abound

[tittytheif]

cadoodles

[tittytheif]

[tittytheif]

“Not the first girl to come up claiming I gave it to them”…Do cishet men hear themselves???