tired-momfriend

[tired-momfriend]

if house md were running in 2024 there would be an episode with a patient who identifies as an ‘online content creator’ (cagily) where house agrees to take the case primarily because when he offhandedly refers to her as an onlyfans model both cameron and cuddy get really offended and say it’s a sexist assumption so he doubles down and becomes committed to finding the patient’s onlyfans and proving it. at some point it would be revealed that chase actually is an onlyfans model and started doing it as a stopgap after his dad died and he suddenly got disinherited but he makes so much money off it that now medicine is basically just a hobby. cameron and foreman both disagree with the concept online sex work but it turns out they disagree for different reasons (cameron thinks it’s exploitative and not-feminist, foreman finds it distasteful and thinks people should get ‘real jobs’) and spend most of their scenes together arguing about this while chase gets continually more shifty. they break into the patient’s house and there’s a full ringlight and camera setup which seems to confirm house’s suspicions. while trying to find the patient’s onlyfans house accidentally finds chase’s onlyfans instead and considers publicly embarrassing him about it like he did with wilson’s sex tape but soon realises that most of the staff at the hospital are already subscribed to chase’s onlyfans so makes fun of him for that instead. it then transpires that the reason why the patient is so cagey about being a content creator is that she’s an ASMR artist and all the soap she’s been shaving on camera has irritated her lungs. cuddy is about to make house give her 20 extra hours of clinic duty as recompense but at last minute it’s revealed that the website the patient uses for some of her bonus commissions is, drumroll…onlyfans, because she’s been banned from patreon. how does house know this? wilson is subscribed to her because the soap videos sometimes soothe him to sleep. something by cigarettes after sex plays. roll end credits.

[tired-momfriend]

How Bokuto got through college is beyond me, but I’d still like to think he did His Very Best ™️

[tired-momfriend]

[tired-momfriend]

I had to hear what all of his Sounds in this episode sound like when they're strung together without pause like a video game dialogue showcase and... I wasn't disappointed

[tired-momfriend]

If the gore in a gore/body horror movie is mainly cg then what’s even the point

[tired-momfriend]

Add your own if you want too

[tired-momfriend]

not to worry mutuals, I’ve recruited a halfling to detect any and all spike traps on your dashboard, just make sure not to scroll too fast so he has time to find them

[tired-momfriend]

crisp glass of water moodboard

[tired-momfriend]

[tired-momfriend]

polar bears 🐻‍❄️

i love the one on the right shes so adorableee

[tired-momfriend]

Elon’s latest baby mama says she used genetic engineering (CRISPR is not ethically approved by the scientific community for use on humans) to create the perfect human with “enhancements from other organisms”

[tired-momfriend]

Another angle for y'all 👌 with some refreshing commentary lmao

Elon: "[...] this one really mattered, and i just wanna say thank you for making it happen, thank you" *does nazi salute*

person behind camera: "that was weird as shit...yeah that - yo, that motherfucker just did the heil Hitler joint"

[tired-momfriend]

source

[tired-momfriend]

(guy experiencing the consequences of his actions) yeah i don’t know why these things keep happening to me i must be cursed or something