Minnie || 23 ☕️ In progress publish the new fanfic series 📲
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Okay but sex addict heeseung pls pls like he loses his damn mind if he doesn't feel a pussy wrapped around him at least twice a day j gehssjsnsj
I looove the sex addict trope so much like it’s so hot imagining heeseung always wanting to fuck to the point that it’s all he can think about
warnings: mentions of porn (videos + magazines), doggy, use of a pocket pussy, fucking while on a zoom meeting (audio and camera are turned off), unprotected sex, creampie, implied mention of multiple rounds of fucking.
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Heeseung loves sex.
Sex is so natural for him, the feeling of his cock springing to life makes his heart race because he loves getting himself off and watching himself be covered in his sticky cum. He’s always hard, even when his horniness is simmering underneath the surface.
You’re here to satiate that need with him ever since you moved in next door. One text from Heeseung and you’re coming over no matter the time of day because like him, you worked from home.
He’s supposed to be in a meeting but his cock needs to be wrapped up in something warm and tight. His camera and microphone are muted while he plows into your pussy from behind, one knee on his bed while his other foot is planed beside you to push himself so deep into your hole that you feel him right in your cervix.
“Love this tight pussy,” he moans and grips your ass to push and pull you back into him despite the sound of his manager talking in the background. “I’d fuck you all day if you let me.”
Back when he was younger and first learned how he loved to pleasure himself, he thinks his obsession with sex began when he found porn magazines underneath his brother’s bed just before college. He’s not afraid to admit he stole it out of sheer curiosity and felt his cock harden upon seeing naked tits and wet pussies out on full display for him like that. Heeseung pretended these women were spreading themselves out for him and that alone was enough to make his bedsheets dirty every single time.
College was where he let loose. Heeseung practically bathed himself in sex with the amount of girls he’d meet every single weekend at parties to make friends and get some action. This was the first time he’d been away from home and the unsupervised weeks made for a perfect excuse to get fucked up on the weekends and have sex without abandon. Nobody could tell him what to do and he knows he’s hot enough to get his dick wet at the snap of his fingers.
He’s never met anybody who shares his libido but it doesn’t matter to him much when girls opened up their legs for him. He’s not shy about it at all, eating pussy like he’ll die without it and fucking them like he doesn’t know how to do anything else. Heeseung needs to have sex and he needs to have something wrapped up around him at all times of the day. No exceptions.
His best purchase was a pocket pussy when he first moved into his one bedroom apartment without any roommates. Heeseung was free to masturbate whenever he wanted and didn’t have to time the arrival of a dorm mate with his sex sessions. He no longer needed to touch himself in the quiet of the night and didn’t need to worry about how loud he was moaning since there wasn’t a single person who he needed to worry about.
Heeseung would sit in meetings with his camera off and stroke himself with his toy and he’d fuck it during the nights when no one was free to come over. Netflix had nothing on the loud fry of his voice when he’d plunge his hardened cock into the lives toy and it was never enough to cum just once. He knows the tight silicon toy enables his addiction but he really doesn’t care. His favorite way to use it is when he puts his favorite porn videos on his tv and uses it to get off while he puts the toy in all positions on his couch.
Somehow, meeting you the day you moved in next to him felt like fate. He welcomed you into the neighborhood by giving you four consecutive orgasms and the following week made you realize your neighbor loved to fuck.
He abandoned his regular flings for you, telling himself it was the convenience. You loved the feeling is his dick shoved down your throat or when he was lodged inside of your hole, so much that it didn’t matter what time of day it was, you would always be free for him.
You find yourself on your hands and knees more often, especially at this our on this day of the week. This is when Heeseung has an hour long internal meeting that he isn’t needed for but has to attend anyway. It’s the perfect window to have a quick fuck. Heeseung doesn’t even need to text you because you always come knocking on his door when it starts.
“I’m gonna cum again,” he grunts when he watches your orgasm coat his cock. “Fuck, fuck, yeah. I’m cumming baby.”
He stills his hips when he spurts right into you just as his manager shares his screen for a PowerPoint presentation. Heeseung clenches his ass and pushes the rest of his cum out of you, which bubbles around your opening and seeps right back onto his softening cock.
It’s too good to quit. Heeseung doesn’t think he could ever stop fucking.
***
please reblog if you liked it and feel free to send me scenarios and ideas :)
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Pairing: lawyer!Jaehyun x divorcée!reader
Genre: age gap, drama, romance, smut
Word Count: 24k
Summary: Jaehyun has a ruthless, cruel and not so legal way of getting his clients everything they want out of their divorce. After all, to do the job right, a lawyer like him is not supposed to believe something like 'love' exists in the first place. That is until he meets his next client who also has a not so legal way of creeping right into his heart and make him question all his morals.
A/N: Man, I miss Jaehyun :( D-541
“I want to divorce my husband.”
Jaehyun hadn’t spared you, the young woman who had been following him since the lobby, a single glance, purposefully ignoring every word you were trying to direct at him as he walked hurriedly and steadily to the elevators.
He was already running late that morning thanks to a fight with the parking attendant since apparently, his permission for the parkade had run out last night. And now, an annoying woman blocking the elevator doors after he had gotten in and hindering Jaehyun from reaching his office’s floor was a bit of a stretch at this ungodly hour. Eventually, he couldn’t ignore your existence anymore.
“Move,” he demanded, annoyed.
“I won’t,” you objected.
Pressing the ‘close’-button over and over again, Jaehyun rolled his eyes at your perseverance as not even the heavy doors hitting your arms could chase you away. He stared at you, observing the persistence mirrored in your eyes as you pushed the doors aside again. He silently gave you credit for that.
“I want to divorce my husband,” you said again. “And I need you to successfully do so!”
Jaehyun let his eyes wander as you had piqued his interest ultimately. Your stubborn spirit reminded him a little bit of himself. But only a little bit. He examined you thoroughly. You were dressed elegantly in a pencil skirt, blouse and high heels. No wrinkles in your clothes, hair tidily pulled out of your face, not a strand out of order. You dressed like the average woman approaching him for his help: trophy wives in their thirties up to fifties, trapped in a marriage that was falling apart for always one and the same reason,
the lack of love.
In these kinds of marriages, mutual love rarely existed anymore. It was the same pattern again and again: The woman went blindly and head over heels in love into the marriage and throughout time, got frustrated with their lives as their marriage turned out entirely different from what they had imagined. The husband was almost never at home, business was always more important, and rarely did a case not involve cheating.
A person who had once been a naive woman in love had usually changed into a vengeful wife who wanted to take her husband to the cleaners by the time they consulted Jaehyun’s law firm. After all, they didn’t believe in love anymore, and that was why his job was so easy, and even a little bit of fun.
But there was one difference that made you stand out significantly from all of his past clients, Jaehyun silently remarked to himself as his gaze stopped on your face: You were young. So, so young.
“Divorce your husband?” he repeated your words. “Aren’t you too young to be married for long enough yet?”
Your expression darkened, but he took it as a challenge. It wouldn’t be the first time he clashed with a potential client. As a matter of fact, it wouldn’t be a successful case for him if his client wouldn’t start hating him at some point - and then preaching him to the heavens when he got them all they had asked for in the process, and more.
“Do you want this case or not?” you retorted. “I promise, you won’t regret it.”
Jaehyun raised a brow. Straightforward and witty. He hadn’t expected that from an early twenty-something. Perhaps, he should pay weight to your words, the fact that he wouldn’t regret it. Judging by your age alone, there was surely more to the story, and he was curious to get under the surface of it all.
Jaehyun removed his hand from the ‘close’-button while simultaneously a moment of relief flashed through his face - along with a grin.
The door stayed open as he asked, “How long have you been married for?”
“Two and a half years.”
That was nothing.
“Is there a prenup?”
“Yes.”
As always.
“What’s your husband’s name?”
You hesitated.
In a lot of cases, Jaehyun knew his client’s spouses just by their name. Wives of CEOs, chairmen, actors, doctors, politicians, investors … they all came to him.
“Kang Seungmin.”
Jaehyun almost visibly took in an exasperated breather.
“Kang Seungmin who is related to the Aewha Group?”
You nodded. “His older brother is the CEO.”
Pause.
“Be here tomorrow, 8am.”
____
You remembered the day you got married like it was yesterday.
You weren’t wearing your dream wedding dress.
Your dress was a designer that your husband’s mother had picked out. It had been too voluminous, too heavy, and it hadn’t suited your style at all. Your makeup had made it hard for you to recognize yourself and they had put too many extensions in your hair. But that was what they had wanted you to look like - and you had complied.
It wasn’t your dream wedding venue.
It had taken place at the Shilla Hotel and you hadn’t had any say in the decoration, it was all white and beige when you had wanted sprinkles of purple, your favorite color. The cake was vanilla flavored when you had wanted blueberry, and the program had involved a choir, not a band. But that was what they had wanted the reception to be like - and you had complied.
Your friends and family weren’t there.
You hadn’t known a single person at the wedding except for your future husband’s family. When you had been sitting there, feeling lonely and left out, there was no one you could have turned to, no familiar and friendly face. Your guests were all only business partners and your new family’s friends - and you had complied.
You had never felt so lonely in your life like on the day that was supposed to be the happiest day of your life. But you had complied with everything, because you had been so, so in love.
And what was left of that now?
“So, Mrs. Kang,” Mr. Jeong started the next morning after you had appeared in front of his office at 8am sharp. “After you have filled out all the information about you and your husband, I just want to know one thing…”
“Which is…?”
You hoped he didn’t notice how you kept your shaking legs in place with your palms pressing on top of your thighs. You knew exactly what was coming and you were prepared for that, but it always made you nervous, regardless of how many times someone would bring this topic up. And it happened almost every time.
“What is it that you’re after?”
You were confused. That wasn’t what you had expected. “Pardon me?”
The lawyer took off his glasses with which he had previously read through your information carefully and put them next to him on the desk. Then, he propped his elbows against the table and leaned in to you. It was very intimidating as if he wanted to look straight into your soul to detect every lie that could possibly pass your lips.
But there was nothing for you to lie about.
“What do you want out of this marriage, Mrs. Kang?” he carefully elaborated. “Money? The house? Company shares? I can get you everything.”
“In all honesty, Mr. Jeong,” you admitted, “I don’t want any of his money, belongings, mansions and company shares. I just want to get out of this marriage and never be involved with this family again. That’s all I want.”
He let out a long sigh and closed the file with your information.
“Are you… done?” you asked.
“Yes. With you.”
“Excuse me?”
“You don’t want anything? No money, no mansions, no company shares? Then, where is the thrill? What do you need me for?” The lawyer leaned back in his seat and crossed his arms behind his head. “I think it’s better for you to look for another lawyer.”
“His material possessions were not the reason I was trying to find consultation with you.” You stayed calm and didn’t want to get irritated by his change in demeanor. “I grew up wealthy already, Mr. Jeong. I’m not dependent on his money. When I turned eighteen, I inherited the trust fund my parents had opened up for me the day I was born. It’s enough to live comfortably until… well, the end of my days.”
“So, you are two wealthy people who have married and you don’t want to take anything from him just out of spite. According to the law, the trust fund still rightfully belongs to you as it had been handed over to you prior to your marriage.” If he was confused by your statement, then he didn’t let it slip. “So, what is it that makes divorcing him so difficult then, Mrs. Kang? What is it that you’re after, exactly? I know there is something after all.”
“It’s not what I’m after. It’s what he is after.” You reached down to your bag, pulling out a file that you then attentively placed on the lawyer’s desk. “Here is a copy of my prenup. Please open page 35. I highlighted the most important parts.”
He put back on his glasses and opened the documents at the respective page. You visibly saw his brows furrow at the paragraph that you had pointed out.
“So, it’s the other way around. In case of a divorce, it’s not him who will lose everything,” the lawyer concluded. “But you will lose everything, and it will be all transcribed to him. Your trust fund money, your possessions, everything from before your marriage even…” He stilled. “Just… everything.”
“Exactly.”
“I’m sorry Mrs. Kang, but…” He looked at you in utter disbelief. And the worst thing was that you couldn’t even blame him. You were very ashamed of yourself, too. “How could you have even signed this in the first place? I have never seen a prenup like this in my entire career. But then again, I've only been practicing in my own law firm for a short few years….”
He was straightforward with a certain sharpness lying on his tongue that tended to take a derogatory way at times. This lawyer had surely seen so much already, but according to his words, this must just be an entire new level of naiveness he hadn’t encountered ever before.
“I was young and in love.”
There was certainly no other explanation you wanted to give him yet, even though he was looking at you expectantly, waiting for you to elaborate the decision and specifically the situation you had been in when signing this agreement. But again, you had to disappoint him. You would have still signed the papers if the circumstances had been different, you were certain of that. Why would it matter if you left out an additional reason?
The lawyer let out a long sigh. It was like you could hear his thoughts in your own mind: Such a naive, stupid girl, getting married so young and signing away all her rights just to be with a powerful man forever, out of blinded love. You endured it like so many other things in your life.
“Love.” He snorted, confirming your thoughts, and closed the marriage contract with a thud. “It’s absolutely good for nothing. You clients prove it to me every time.”
You tilted your head. “Just because I’m getting divorced doesn’t mean I don’t believe in love anymore, Mr. Jeong. Those are two very different things.”
“I’m aware of the fact that my clients almost all get married out of love like you,” he corrected himself strictly and made his standpoint clear to you. “Now, wanting a divorce from the person who you once had such strong feelings for… how can you still believe in something that has failed you so thoroughly?”
“But love hasn’t failed me,” you objected. “It’s the person who failed me. And just because that certain man has let me down, doesn’t mean someone else will, too. There is not only one person in the world to love. I’m not going to say I hate all men and will never meet someone I can open myself up to again, Mr. Jeong. I suppose that’s what the majority of people who come here say to you, am I right? But I won’t. There are people in their fifties finding love all over again, so if I have to wait another thirty years just to experience the same, I will willingly do so. I will never give up hope, I won’t let spite devour me whole. I will wait for my time to come.”
He had fallen into silence and his gaze was impenetrable while you kept talking and eventually came to an end. The Lawyer was either baffled by your naivete once again, or you had sincerely taken him by surprise and the usually so witty man for once, since your meeting, didn’t know what to reply.
“You’re so full of positivity, Mrs. Kang, it almost makes me feel sick. Where is your anger, your vengefulness?” he eventually responded, and you felt a wave of disappointment wash over you. “But since you don’t seem to have my clients’ usual bitterness and grimness to drive by, we will rely on your insolent positivity to win this case. Or stupidness, depending on how you view your case.”
You had never been so subtly attacked and complimented at the same time, but since it was coming from the ruthless attorney himself, you put more weight on the latter. “Whatever works for me, I guess.”
He folded his forearms on the table and leaned forward, closer to you, narrowing his eyes before he almost whispered, “But there is one thing I always demand from my clients to win a case and my trust eventually. Without this certain thing, you will lose both.”
You inhaled deeply in expectation. “And that is…?”
“The entire truth.” The response was so simple, but you sensed there was more depth in it. “If I ask you something, you’re going to tell me the truth. You cannot conceal or hide anything. There cannot be a detail that you consider too irrelevant or something that you consider too embarrassing to tell me. You will tell me everything I ask for and not ask for, are we clear?”
At this moment, you felt like he was staring right into your soul, marking this a make it or break it point for your business relationship. If you lied, would he be able to detect right away? Or was he bluffing and only wanted to intimidate you? Had he already sensed that you had left out an important aspect in your marriage?
“We are very much clear.”
A grin flashed across his face, making you frown. “Very well. Then I need you to do the exact opposite.”
“The opposite? Then… I should lie?”
“Exactly. And please don’t hit me with the ‘I cannot lie, I’m a sincere person, I cannot hurt someone’ bullshit. We don’t do that here. In order to win what you want, you have to play dirty. Be honest with me, but when I need you to lie and do reprehensible things, you have to comply. Do you think you can do this, little miss sunshine? Or are we way too sincere and positive for that?”
“I’m sorry, if you mean playing dirty do yo-”
“Can you do that?” he interrupted you. “This is the only thing I need to know. Can you play dirty when I need you to?”
This shouldn’t surprise you. Deep down, you had always known what kind of lawyer he was. Everyone knew. That was why you had eventually seeked out for him. You couldn’t win this case on your own or with any lawyer, it had to be him. You had tried so hard and had approached not only attorneys in this city, but all over the country - to no avail.
This lawyer was your last resort, and never had you thought you would go this far. But if you had to lie and play dirty if asked to break free from your golden cage, then that was what you were going to do.
If you had to play dirty to see your family again, then you would do so.
You gulped, but still brought out, “I can do that.”
Even though it came reluctantly, he still believed you and said with a satisfied smile, “Very well, ma’am.”
_____
“So, this is the golden cage that you’re always referring to.” Your lawyer stood in the lobby, inspecting the entrance location. “Interesting.”
It was an odd sight for you - to have your divorce lawyer, who was technically still a stranger even after meeting a few times in his firm, in the home that you were sharing with your husband. But then again, in these two and a half years here together, your house had always been filled with only strangers and people you weren’t fond of, so this wasn’t quite a new experience.
Your home was a multistory penthouse in a high rise building in one the city’s wealthiest neighborhood, because another quarter was a degradation for your husband’s family’s status. It was all too modernly and minimalistically designed with no touch of personal memories in the form of pictures or belongings. The furniture was too clean, the art too abstract, the rooms too empty. It had always felt more like a museum rather than a home for you - grand, impressive and utterly overwhelming.
You had spent days endlessly wandering between the floors and looking out of the gigantic window across the river out of which one side of the penthouse was entirely crafted, spanning over two levels. This was the only thing you liked about your home as it was easier to dream yourself away while watching the sunset. Many times, you had imagined living on the other side of the river, too. Where it wasn’t all filled with stuck up millionaires, people too focused on changing their appearances and overall shallowness.
You had tried so hard to connect with this life, but even though you had grown up wealthily on this side of the river as well, there was one thing you were missing but had been showered with all throughout your childhood right until your marriage: love, comfort, warmth.
“I wonder how much this is?”
Your lawyer had picked up an ornate porcelain vase from the side table and threw it into the air. Your heart nearly stopped as you watched the decor flying off and gasped. Reaching out your hands, you tried to catch the vase yourself, but a moment later, it was landing safely in your lawyer’s hands again, who then turned to you, grinning.
“I guess it's very expensive,” he concluded.
You yanked the vase out of his hands and returned it to where it belonged. “Don’t do that again! This decor is finely picked out by my in-laws, and if there is only one vase slightly out of arrangement or one single statue looking in the wrong direction when they come over - which is almost every day - hell will break loose.”
He threw his head back and laughed. “That’s exactly what I imagined after what you told me about them. How can someone endure living here anyway?”
“I’m tougher than you think, Mr. Jeong.”
“Hm.” His eyes then fell on your appearance and scanned you up and down. “At first glance, you look like you totally belong here with your pantsuit and perfectly styled hair.”
“Just because I look like I belong here, doesn’t mean I do, Mr. Jeong.”
“Wise words for someone so young who doesn’t always make wise decisions, ma’am.”
You exhaled deeply. “Can we get over this as quickly as possible? You came here for a reason, right? Let’s get seated on the living room and-”
“Seats won’t be necessary,” he waved off. “You have to show me around your home.”
“And why would I have to do that?”
“Your husband is overseas on a business trip you’ve said, and I have to get a picture of the physical possessions, with how much money we’re dealing with apart from bank accounts, shares and all that stuff.”
“I see, that makes sense. But nothing here belongs to me, though.”
“That’s even better.” He turned around. “Which room is that?”
“The living room.”
“Great. Let’s start there.” Your lawyer entered the area as though he knew the place by heart while questioning, “You mentioned your in-laws visit here every day, Mrs. Kang?”
“Almost,” you partially affirmed while following him. “I guess they can’t let go of their son… and their need to control me.”
“What would they need to control about you? Are you somehow involved in their business?”
Your lawyer looked around in the gigantic living room that faced the panorama window reaching from the ground to the ceiling on the second floor. The sofa was placed in the middle of the area, right in a pit that was accessible by two steps built into the ground, encircling a marble coffee table probably worth a single-family house. Right next to it was a billiard table, most likely valuable just as much. This was going to be a very long evening, considering the inventory and the prices.
“I’m not involved in their business, Mr. Jeong.” You paused for a short while, invisible struggling with something inwardly. But you came to the conclusion that if you couldn’t tell your attorney, who then? “In fact, I’m secretly building my own one.”
“Oh?” He raised a brow. “Which kind of business?”
You remained silent for a few moments until he shifted to you and looked at you with inquiring eyes. “A bridal shop.”
You had already prepared a few witty responses, because whenever you told people about your business idea, they started laughing at you. Especially your in-laws. They had laughed at you so hard and shrugged your idea off immediately that you had never brought it up to them ever again. And your husband? He hadn’t even acknowledged it. You were not allowed to work in this marriage anyway.
That was why you almost desperately needed to win this case and all your money back - to fulfill your dream and reunite with your family. You could do that. That was how much you believed in yourself. Just nobody else ever did.
“So you like wedding dresses, ma’am?” your lawyer asked almost in passing, but there was no mocking undertone in his voice. “Somehow very ironic for someone who’s filing for divorce, don’t you think?”
“It’s my passion, Mr. Jeong.”
“How come?”
“I told you I will always have hope and I will always believe in love. That’s what I want to pass on as a message to someone like me. Someone who has found the love of their life, no matter for the first, second or third time, someone full of hope and brightness. Just because you haven’t experienced it yet or because one love has ended, doesn’t mean you’ll never experience this special kind of connection ever. It makes me happy to be part of something so significant. It keeps me going, it keeps me… hopeful, you know.”
“So you want to be part of other people’s special day to keep the thought alive that one day, you will still find the love of your life?”
You clicked your tongue over the fact that everything coming out of his mouth sounded so… negative. “If you want to put it like this… I rather see it as an opportunity to share your happiness with equal minded people.”
“Why wedding dresses and not flowers then? Isn’t it more fulfilling to bring joy to people’s everyday life with flowers they give someone else most of the time?”
“You’re right, Mr. Jeong.” You smiled as you did not disagree with each other on this topic. “But my mother is a fashion designer and my father is an art dealer, so that’s the natural trajectory of my life. I love fashion, even if it doesn’t look like it. But there is only very little you can experiment with style-wise when all eyes are on you and you have to keep up a certain reputation according to your in-laws. I hide a lot of pent-up creativity not many people know of.”
“Oh, who would have guessed you’re not always all pantsuits and pencil skirts, Mrs. Kang.” He shrugged. “So you truly believe in it?”
“In what?”
“In love that lasts a lifetime.”
“As I said, Mr. Jeong… if we cease to believe in love… what is there to live for?”
"Wealth. Popularity. Freedom. Fun.” He snickered, but not in a way in which he made fun of you. He was more impressed by his own funny answer.
“But you have no one to share this with. Doesn’t your happiness then only last for so long?”
“Oh, I do have people to share this all with. Just because finding love is not my priority doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy the company of beautiful women.”
You let out a deep sigh, but he shrugged your reaction off. Despite that, you had ended the topic on a good note, because for the very first time ever, you were allowed to talk about your passion without getting cut off immediately.
By that time, you had already arrived at the kitchen. It was an impressively wide, open room made of expensive white marble which appeared unused for ages as it was spotless and shiny. As a matter of fact, just as it appeared, it was never used by anyone in this family - that much was true. This kitchen functioned only as a showroom when the family had guests over to lay out the appetizers and the buffet.
“So you have people who cook for you?” your lawyer concluded.
“It’s a personal cook that has gotten hired, yes.”
He shook his head in disbelief. “Must be nice being rich, having people cook and clean for you every day.”
“Trust me, Mr. Jeong,” you opposed, “it’s not all that.”
You both then continued on to the second floor, and you could see him turning more and more impressed with the fact how your house was furnished. Not only the first floor was luxurious, but every other room as well. If there was something touching the ground or the walls, one could be sure that its worth came at least close to a small car, from furniture to decoration.
“Do you have to go in there?” you pressed through gritted teeth, and your lawyer rolled his eyes as you both stood in front of the closed master bedroom. “It’s a private area and there is not much inside.”
“Unless you have some secret toys lying out in the open, there is nothing to be ashamed of, we all know what’s going on in bedrooms, don’t we, Mrs. Kang?”
He grinned, unaware of the fact that there hadn’t been something going on in this bedroom for at least a year already. You also suppressed a gasp about his unhinged comment that was not very gentleman-like. But you also weren’t surprised your divorce lawyer, who always told you to play dirty, would leave dirty comments as well. You would just ignore them like the lady you got trained to represent.
“I guess you’re not sharing the bedroom anymore?” your lawyer asked as he wandered around in your private chamber after having opened the space.
“What has this got anything to do with my divorce?” you wanted to know, slightly enraged.
“A lot. If you can confirm that you haven’t shared a bed in quite a time, it’s easier to believe that your marriage has been in the shambles for so long and not a decision simply made overnight.”
“Divorce is never a decision simply made overnight, Mr. Jeong,” you clarified, but he corrected you instantly,
“I didn’t mean it that way, Mrs. Kang. You will wonder how many clients come to me directly the day after they caught their partner cheating and change their minds to return to them a few days later. I want to know how serious you are and that it’s not a decision made on an impulse.”
“I don’t love my husband anymore, Mr. Jeong. Isn’t my tone sincere enough, my expression when I talk about my failed marriage? The fact I go through these lengths at my age?” Your voice got louder and louder, but he didn’t interfere. “But if you need to know about that part of my life too, then yes, I can confirm that my husband and I haven’t shared this bed for a little over a year already as he’s sleeping in his office.”
“Relax, okay?” he comforted you as you had ended your speech. “I was only asking.”
You dropped your head, suddenly ashamed of your slight blow up. “I’m sorry. That’s not… I’m usually not like this.”
“Don’t worry about it. It’s normal to feel all these emotions going through a divorce. Sometimes, you need a ventil. It won’t be the last time that you talk to me like that, so let it all out. You’ll be surprised how much it helps.”
He was right, you thought to yourself, feeling a little bit lighter around your chest. But to your disadvantage, you bathed in that moment for a second too long and missed your lawyer opening another door in your bedroom of which he had probably assumed was your walk-in-closet.
“No, don-”
You stretched out your hand and wanted to reach him, but you weren’t fast enough and could only watch the door swing open, revealing a small room next to the bedroom that was certainly too spacious to only be a closet.
Instead, what he found in the room was a crib by the window where dim light was making its way through half-closed curtains. A light shade of yellow had been chosen for the tapestry, matching the beige carpet while the remaining furniture such as the changing unit and the crib itself were white. A few pictures on the walls added a playful undertone to the room, but that was it.
“I was only allowed to choose the pictures,” you explained recently as you slowly approached him. “They are sunflowers in different shapes. You know what sunflowers stand for?” You smiled meekly. “They stand for happiness and joy. This room should have brought me happiness and joy, but instead, it gave me years of sadness.”
He didn’t ask. Perhaps, he could figure it out himself as you had neither mentioned nor brought a child to your appointments with him. If not, then he sensed it wasn’t the right time to push the topic just yet.
“Let’s go,” your lawyer eventually exclaimed and closed the door behind him. “Let’s make your living room a bit messy when I unpack my laptop and we note down the cost of every item in here. That’s gonna be fun!”
He sometimes came off as rude and uncouth, but he knew when to stop talking.
_____
“What’s that?” You unpacked the plastic bag in front of you and pulled out a black long sleeve, black pants, black sneakers and a black beanie as you unsuccessfully attempted to crack a joke, “Were black clothes on sale today?”
“Those are your clothes for tonight.”
“If you haven't noticed yet, Mr. Jeong…” You looked down on yourself. “My style is classic, elegant. Not streetstyle, not coquette, or whatever this is. I’m still representing the family I married into and cannot wear this.”
“I’m sorry, but black cashmere sweaters were not on sale today, ma’am,” your lawyer said, and as you drew a closer look at him, you noticed that he was dressed all in black already too, and not in his usual suit, but more casual, even wearing a beanie himself. “Now undress and change into the clothes that I brought.”
“What would I wear this for?” You lifted up your hands and pulled up the pants. You usually never wore pants. “Where are we going? To the club? I don’t go to clubs.”
“No, we’re going to your house.”
“And why would we need these clothes if we’re going there?”
Somehow, you sensed you wouldn’t like the answer at all. “Because we’re going to rob you.”
“I- I don’t understand. Robbing… me? My home? While I’m there?”
“No.” Your lawyer came over to you, took the beanie out of the bag and then put it on your own head. He pulled the ends down into your face, messing up your slick bun so that a few strands stuck into your forehead. “Fits you perfectly.”
“Do you mean…”
The corners of his lips tilted up. “Exactly. You’re going to rob your own house.”
“Are you nuts?!”
“Ma’am, these words out of your mouth?” He snickered. “Change into the new clothes and then we can go.”
“What should this be good for?”
“It sounds cliche, but you really can’t see people who dress in black in the dark very clearly.”
“No, I mean robbing my home. What should that be good for?”
“Ah, that.” He scratched the back of his head. “When there is nothing of value in the house, then there are no items to fight over, hence less work for us. You said you didn’t care about his possessions, right? Then he won’t have anything left in the morning. We’re only going to grab jewelry and this kind of stuff for you to keep or sell. Just out of spite.”
You gasped in shock. “That’s illegal! I’m pretty sure that’s even a crime!”
“I can guarantee you,” he confirmed, “this is a crime on paper. Remember you told me you could play dirty?”
When you had agreed on playing dirty when it was needed, you had hoped that it was only a formality, that he was exaggerating or just wanted to test your willpower. You had never expected you both standing in front of your dark home in the middle of the night, dressed up as robbers just to do exactly that: commit a robbery.
With your arms crossed to hide your shaking limbs, you looked around nervously, sending a quick prayer to the heavens. Even though you lived on the highest floor and had used several backdoors through the building so that no one would know you had even entered in the first place, you still felt the risk of getting caught any second.
“This doesn’t help me at all,” your lawyer complained while handling the entrance door with different tools that made noises and left traces a little too obvious for your liking.
“There is CCTV everywhere here and you just ruined the door’s frame,” you whispered in agony. “When my husband reports the robbery, they will check the time and date and then see us somewhere!”
“Do you think it’s my first time doing this?” he answered calmly while the door then opened smoothly with almost no sound. You furrowed your brows in question and wondered. Wasn’t the alarm supposed to go off? With a smug smile, your lawyer arose from his position and pushed the door entirely open. “Of course I had let the entire grid be turned off.”
You blinked in confusion. “How?”
“Again, you’ll wonder how far one comes in this country with just a little bribery.”
“That’s not very ethical,” you chided.
“You know what’s not ethical either?” He locked eyes with you. “Your husband taking all the money that’s legally yours from before your marriage, leaving you with no seed capital to start anew, with no prospects. Yes, it’s in the prenup, but what gives him the right to rob you like that just because it’s written on some piece of paper? Ma’am, the world is not a fair place,” he said confidently. “Sometimes, you just have to accept that. So, let’s go on a robbery.”
Your eyes narrowed, your nervosity completely wiped by now. “Let’s start with his office on the ground floor. I know he has some very expensive jewelry stored openly in there.”
Your lawyer’s grin widened. “Perfect.”
He had destroyed the door in a way that carried evidence of forced entry for the police investigation. On your way to the suggested room, you moved through the living area as well, and your lawyer had made it his mission to throw over some chairs and a small side table that had once carried some valuable crystal figurines that your mother in law liked to collect. They then all laid shattered on the floor.
“That was crystal!” you cried out. “Do you know how much it was worth? That was not necessary!”
“We’re on a robbery, not on a shopping trip at Tiffany’s,” he groaned. “Do robbers look like they care about some figurines? They come in a hurry and take everything valuable they can get in a short amount of time. They want the big stuff, gold, silver, money, jewelry… they don’t care for porcelain, vases… or whatever this was, things that are too big and break easily. Remember, we’re robbers, we have to make it look like we don’t care. Now, show me where he keeps his valuables stored.”
“There is way too much valuable stuff. How are we supposed to carry all of it?”
“We won’t.”
Your lawyer moved to the huge cabinet in the living area, stopped there for a moment, and then threw his entire body against the furniture. You let out a loud gasp, and another one as he pushed against the cabinet one more time, bringing it to a fall along with the pieces that were stored inside, instantly shattering in the process. The noise was immense and you had to cover your ears. He might not look like it in his suit, but now that he was only wearing a rather tight shirt, you noticed that your lawyer was very well built and that this was the reason why the cabinet hadn’t stood a chance from the beginning.
He let out a “Phew!” as he turned to you and wiped over his forehead. “You can take on destroying his files and papers, just everything important to him. Let me handle this physical stuff. Don't worry, I made sure the neighbors on the floor beneath weren’t there tonight.”
You understood why you had to do this. If there weren’t many valuable items you had to fight over, the higher would be the chance they would let you off with your own money and the less time and nerves it would take to finalize the divorce, yet the sentiments that tied you to this place…
… they were nonexistent.
Opening all of your husband’s cabinets, rummaging through them and pulling stuff out just to scatter them everywhere felt somewhat very satisfying. You saw all his important files and papers on the ground and stomped on them like a maniac. Everything he worked so hard for, everything he owned while trying to steal from you simultaneously like he had done all your life already. Back in the days, you had just been too young and naive to notice.
You had held back so much during all this time and had never found a way to verbalize your feelings. A lady didn’t do that. A lady was always graceful and just endured. Right now though, you didn’t feel very ladylike. And it was the best feeling in so long.
You only stopped when your lawyer stood there next to you, arms folded across his chest, and there was an edge of mocking delight in his voice when he asked, “You’re done already?”
You lowered your head as he had caught you red-handed, but you also couldn’t wipe off the faint beam that remained on your lips even when he started rummaging through your husband’s cabinets in search of the watches you had told him were stored in there.
“I wasn’t aware he has such a large collection of the most expensive watches in the world,” your lawyer commented when he lightened up a drawer with the flashlight. “If I keep one to myself, would he notice? But then again, he won’t see any of these again anyway. So maybe I should ask you?”
You let out a long sigh and grabbed the watch from him that you then threw into the bag that he had brought along with. “That’s not funny. I think you make enough money to buy yourself an expensive watch.”
“Not this brand, but well…”
You rolled your eyes and continued with the sham robbery on the lower floor before moving on to the second. It was easy to destroy your own belongings as well. You didn’t feel any sentiment as you had expected. Over time, you had grown so resentful, at this point, you just really didn’t care anymore, except for…
“Don’t. Not inside there!” You threw yourself against the door your lawyer had initiated to open. There was no way he didn’t know what kind of room this was after his last visit, so he went in there with a purpose. As you lifted your head, a flash of empathy crossed his face, but you stopped your pleading gaze from breaking eye contact with him. “Please…”
You had been wrong. There was still something your sentiments were tied to in this place, the room where your baby should have lived.
“I’m sorry,” you heard him tell you with the lowest and softest form of tone he had ever addressed you with. “But if we leave this room out, then something is off. We have to at least rummage-”
Your front teeth pressed into your lower lip as you struggled with either making way for him or fighting him. You had hoped that, regardless of how much time had already passed, your past could always remain here as long as you kept this room locked up - just as your memories.
Letting another person inside would mean you had to close this chapter. And even if your therapist back then had also advised you to change this room into another event space and move on, you had never brought your heart to agree to that. What would happen if you moved out eventually? Wasn’t this the best opportunity to finally take this step? But it came so sudden…
“Can I still keep something?” you asked timidly. “My husband never entered this room, so he wouldn't miss anything, and I know what you want to say… I understand. Just please… one thing I can keep for myself? Maybe a jumper or a toy…”
It took a long while until he shrugged and eventually said, “You know… I don’t think there are robbers this cruel who would destroy a baby room. I mean…” He opened the door, but didn’t go inside. “No one would hide valuable possessions inside here anyway. Let’s go.”
“Thank you,” you whispered, and you wondered whether your tone could even carry a tiny fragment of the relief you were feeling right now to your lawyer, expressing how grateful you were for his understanding and gentleness, even though in his world, it might not make much sense at all.
If he noticed the depth of your gratitude after all, with him risking your scam just to leave you this tiny piece of sentiment, then he didn’t bother showing you.
“Now off to my favorite part… the safe!”
“We won’t reach what’s inside there,” you warned him. “I even doubt his beloved mother knows the passcode to that.”
“Oh, we won’t get to steal what’s inside. But we will try. Ever used a crowbar to hit against something? It’s fun! Letting out a little anger. You’ll like it.”
Oh, how much you indeed came to like it.
____
“Very well.”
Your lawyer seemingly skimmed over the police report before he placed it aside on his desk, deeming it as done. Only a week after the incident, you had brought him a copy of the official papers that your husband had filed to confirm that everything was going according to plan.
After your fake robbery, you had pretended to arrive at home and called your husband in feigned shock that sounded so real over the phone, you nearly believed it yourself. Since he had been in a neighboring city only, he had arrived two hours later, and the performance you had put on in front of him and the police was nearly Oscar-worthy.
“Then, you only have to sign this.” Your lawyer had pulled out another set of documents from a staple on this desk and slid them over to you. “Exactly here, please.”
“What is this?” You read something about a bank in a whole other country that was unfamiliar to you, and a bank account under a name that was unfamiliar, too. “I cannot sign for another person.”
“I know. That’s why you will sign as this person whose name the account is booked under.”
“That’s not legal, I could go to jail for that!”
“This again?” your lawyer groaned. “This is the bank account onto which we will transfer all your money and hide it from your husband and his family. It is required for you to make sure you will keep your inheritance. It will take a few weeks, because of course we can’t just book your whole trust fund money onto another bank from one day to the other, it will take a few steps.”
“So basically money laundering,” you concluded cautiously.
“That’s the legal term, yes. I would describe it as…” He pursed his lips as though he was really thinking hard to come up with something. “Playing hide and seek. It’s suddenly gone and you don’t know exactly how long it will take, but eventually, you’ll always find it.”
You rolled your eyes, but signed the papers nonetheless.
“Very well. Now, grab your purse,” your lawyer summoned while he was taking off his glasses and arose from his chair. “We’re going to celebrate.”
“Celebrate? Celebrate what?”
“This success.” He put on his suit coat, circled his desk and picked up your purse from the chair next to you himself, thrusting it into your lap as you hadn’t made any move to reach for it yourself..
“Okay, but where?”
“Can you drink?”
“Not really.”
“Very well, then I’ll teach you.”
You reluctantly got up from your seat as you suspiciously asked, “Is this something you do with all your clients, Mr. Jeong?”
You were only able to watch his back when he opened the door and admitted, “Only with the ones I like.”
While you were still pondering whether his words had been a compliment, he had decided to take you to a shady bar, at a part of the city where you would never set foot in. It was dim and smelled strongly of smoke. The majority of the guests were male, there was a billiard table in the center, and on the menu were only beer and harder beverages.
“This is not the kind of establishment I usually frequent, Mr. Jeong,” you judged harshly while you struggled to find a comfortable position on the bar stool next to your lawyer.
“No, I don’t think you frequent any bar at all.” He had let himself plop on the stool next to you, took off his jacket and ordered two drinks you hadn’t heard of and neither ever sipped on before. “I purposely brought you here. You thought we were going to visit some kind of fancy rooftop hotel bar? Sorry to disappoint you.”
You scanned your environment with raised brows and a look that made men look back at you - but not in the open kind way. They were rather skeptical and curious. Your lawyer was still the best dressed here, everyone else was wearing casual clothes like they had just hopped by after work. They sensed you didn’t belong here, their faces spoke volumes.
“Don’t worry, these guys are harmless and actually nice. They just want a good drink and company before heading home alone, back to their dark and lonely room. It’s just… they don’t see women here that often.”
“I figured that much. What is this place even? Why are we here, Mr. Jeong?”
“It's a place to have fun! Try having fun, will you? Here.” He slid one of the two glasses the barkeeper had just dropped off on the counter closer to you. “Drink. Maybe this will help you to finally loosen up. And drop the ‘Mr. Jeong’-stuff, we’re off duty now.”
You knew there was no way you could say no, and even though you were doubtfully sniffing on the drink, trying to guess what it could be, you had to empty it under your lawyer’s watchful eyes.
“Oh my god!” You were coughing while your entire face heated up. You felt the liquid burning through your throat, making its way all the way to your stomach and settling there with a heat you had rarely encountered before. “What is this?!”
“It’s a drink to have fun! Are you having fun yet?”
“No!”
“Very well.” He downed his own beverage and then raised his hand. “Barkeeper, we need another two of these.”
You didn’t know how long it took for your perception of time to start shifting. You also didn’t know why you didn’t stop drinking, and certainly not why you didn’t say no. He wouldn’t have forced you, that much you were certain of. Maybe it was because you were truly weak. But maybe, in some kind of twisted circumstance, you were truly starting to have fun.
“Here, hold this.” You thrusted your purse and your jacket into Jaehyun’s hands. “I can’t look at this misery any longer.”
You rolled up the sleeves of your blouse and opened the first two buttons before - suddenly feeling not too hot and cramped in your own skin anymore - you strutted over to the men who had gathered around the billiard table, ready to start another set of games.
“May I join?” you asked into the round and earned many curious looks back. “Trust me guys, I’m really good at this.”
You had played billiard in your home so often, it started to bore you the better you got at this game. And with time, it had started to really dread you, because there had never been anyone to play with the many hours a day had to offer.
“Miss, I don’t think-”
“Let her.” You didn’t see him, but you felt Jaehyun’s presence right behind you. Your chest swelled with confidence and pride. “She said she can do it, so let her.”
The men threw questioning looks at each other, but it didn’t take them too long until they all agreed to let you join, and one of them handed a queue over to you. “Ladies first.”
If your confidence had rooted from the alcohol you had chugged earlier, its effect was starting to lack now, because suddenly, you didn’t feel so full of yourself anymore. You bowed down lightly and positioned yourself on one side of the table. You usually started here, playing at home, but abruptly, you got so nervous with all these men looking at you with a certain edge of judgment they were unsuccessfully trying to conceal.
If you failed the game’s opening, there would be no coming back from it, the momentum missed. You would play bad and they would all make fun of you. Maybe it would be better if you just backed down now…
“Well, well, well…”
You felt a palm on your lower back as you made attempts to arise from your position, keeping you in place as the hand gently pressed against the push upwards that you made. Jaehyun was preventing you from giving up.
He bowed down to you and whispered into your ear, “You don’t have to impress anyone. Just loosen up, let it go and have fun.”
You closed your eyes and breathed in deeply. He didn’t retreat his hand when you opened them again and angled the queue. He didn’t retreat his hand when you pulled back and pushed into the billiard balls. He only retreated his hand when you turned around to him, throwing your arms around his neck to celebrate that you had immediately put three balls into the holes.
You didn’t know when your hair had loosened and now fell in soft waves around your shoulders. You didn’t know when you had opened a third and fourth button on your blouse, revealing a bit of your undershirt. You also had lost count of the amount of drinks you had already downed the further the night processed.
But what you knew was that you had incredible fun.
“Did you see that, Jaehyun?” You were jumping up and down in front of him after winning another game against one of the bar visitors. “I won again!”
“Yes.” He smiled softly, like you had never seen before. “Well done.”
You tilted your head, your lipstick long gone, your cheeks heated. “It suits you so well, Jaehyun.”
“What?”
“That smile.” You beamed back. “Maybe you should wear this expression more often than that scorny grin. I like this one better.”
You couldn’t clearly see in the dim lightning, but you could swear you caught his ears turn red, and it was incredibly cute.
“Alright, brandy blossom,” Jaehyun then called out after you had won another game. “Time to go home before your hubby returns.”
“Already?” you pursed your lips and put down the queue.
“You don’t want to be caught reeking of alcohol, all disheveled, right?”
You gasped and stemmed your hands against your hips. “Of course not! Just… another round, please? I need to properly say goodbye to my new friends.”
He gave in, knowing he didn’t stand a chance against the sad face you and the men you had been playing with pulled all at once.
Seemingly annoyed, Jaehyun sighed. “But just one.”
____
“Jaehyun, everything is spinning.” You leaned against him while he put an arm around you and kept you on your feet as you entered the elevator. “And I feel sick.”
“That’s my fault. I shouldn’t have let you play another round and have a last farewell drink with the other guests.” He pressed the button and watched the door close in front of you both.
“But I had so much fun,” you said as you looked for support by stemming yourself against the elevator wall. “I can’t remember the last time I’ve had this much fun. I would do it all over again. Can we do this again sometime, please… Jaehyun?”
You didn’t know if Jaehyun ever replied to that as you closed your eyes and drifted away. You were moving, that much you knew, or was it all in your memory as well? You didn’t use your own body, but felt like you were being carried, not having to put your feet down. You were floating and a slight breeze pulling on the ends of your hair strands suggested that somewhere, a window must have opened, and then you fell…
… but on a soft cloud.
Your eyes reluctantly opened and you saw Jaehyun bending over you, worry sketched all over his face.
“Thank god!” he exclaimed in relief. “I thought you were passed out.”
“I feel so sweaty and smelly, Jaehyun,” you complained to him, starting to unbutton your blouse’s remaining buttons. “I have to change.”
“I’ll bring you the bathrobe.” But he wasn’t able to leave your side as your hand reached out to him and locked him down with a tight grip around his wrist.
“Please don’t go,” you whined, very much under the influence. “I don’t wanna be alone.”
“I won’t”, he spoke with a voice so gently, even in this state you wondered if it was the same person you spoke to about your divorce. You felt a palm touching your temple, swiping away a few hair strands. “I’ll just bring you a fresh bathrobe.”
Still, you refused and shook your head. “Please stay.”
It didn’t take him a second to answer, “Fine, I’ll stay.”
You drew a deep breather, staring at the half-darkened ceiling that was semi blurry in your drunken state. Only a small light was on, somewhere in the corner. Perhaps, it was the alcohol speaking the following words, but suddenly, you got so sad and hid your face by placing your forearm on your head.
“Actually, you know… I’m so scared of getting divorced.”
“Why is that?”
“I’m scared that I’ll be alone all my life, after all.”
This time, Jaehyun’s answer took him much longer as if he was carefully thinking about each word. “You’re the most fascinating woman I’ve ever encountered. You won’t be having any struggles attracting men who are handsome and treat you well, I’m sure about that. Just this time, choose widely.”
“I don’t think I want to get married so fast again,” you confessed. “I think next time, I will take it slow. I want to get a degree and open my business first. Then, I want to get married again.”
“That sounds very reasonable. You hadn’t had a chance to enjoy your youth much.”
“But I don’t want one night stands, flings, short-lived encounters…” You dared to peek from under your arm and eventually withdrew it from your face to look at Jaehyun properly. “What if I meet my true love during that time? Will he wait until I’m ready?”
He spoke with confident sincerity that was reflected in his expression as he assured you, “If he truly loves you, then he will wait.”
“But… I want to experience the love I am able to give. What if there is really only one love we get to have in a lifetime, and he has been this love for me? What if I’ve used up all of my love for this life already?”
“That’s nonsense,” Jaehyun instantly dismissed. “Love is endless, you cannot use it up. Especially you. You have so much love to give, you cannot be the only person out there. You will meet someone whose love is as endless as yours, I promise.”
“How much love have you got left, Jaehyun? Is it still endless too?”
Only at this moment, you realized that you hadn’t let go of his wrist all along. Only at this moment, when he twisted your both’s fingers in a way that intertwined them. Your chest welled up, you hadn’t felt this cared for in what felt like an eternity.
“Yes,” he whispered. “It’s still endless too.”
“Then I’m glad,” you replied with a smile before drifting off to sleep.
____
You didn’t know when you last had fallen asleep with your husband on the same bed, let alone holding hands with him and having his arms wrapped around you from the back. Waking up groggily on your soft bedding, you first saw your intertwined hands resting on your hip, your husband breathing delicately with his face buried in your nape.
It was odd. You didn’t feel put off or disgusted even as normally whenever he even tried to have some kind of body contact with you. No, you felt content, comfortable and warm. So, so warm.
Except for… as your eyes scanned the room, it dawned on you that this was not your house’s wall and neither was that your window you were looking at. This wasn’t your bed either, and behind you was certainly not your husband laying.
“No, no, no!” Your breath caught and you sat up straight on the mattress, waking up your lawyer with your hectic movements. “No, this can’t be!”
“What’s going on?” He instantly arose into a seating position although his eyes were barely opened yet. “You’re leaving already? It’s only… 6am.”
“Yes!” you screeched and escaped the entangled sheets, starting to adjust your pulled up skirt and open blouse. Your cheeks heated up and you turned around, away from your lawyer’s peripheral so as to not reveal more of your body to him than you already had. “I was supposed to be home by last night! Why am I here? Is this a hotel?”
“You were so drunk, you could barely walk and always drifted off to sleep, I couldn’t just bring you home. I just wanted to make sure…” He paused and then shrugged. “Whatever.”
“Oh my god, what do I tell my husband?” You ran your fingers through your disheveled hair and tried to clean your clothes. You could barely remember the last night. “Where is my phone?”
“Here.” Your lawyer held up the device in front of you. “Zero messages and zero missed calls. Can you calm down now, please? I’ll drive you.”
You took your phone into your hand and looked at it in utter confusion. “That’s strange. Usually, he would call me when I’m not home or at least send me a message. Let’s just hope he didn’t bother checking up in the first place, that would be the best case.” A very unwell feeling suddenly crept up your body, laying itself on your chest and slowly cutting off your air. “Something is off. I need to go home. Really, I need to go home right now.”
Rather cold hands suddenly placed themselves on your left and right cheek, cupping your face. Your lawyer looked straight at you with penetrating eyes. “Please, I need you to calm down first. Now.”
You tried shaking your head, but his grip was too strong. “I can’t-”
“Yes, you can.” There was no talking back. He wouldn’t let you go otherwise. “Calm down, then get dressed and I’ll take you home. Spiraling right now is not helpful. Try collecting your thoughts and then act according to it.”
So you tried as he told you and closed your eyes. You took a few deep breathers, but even though you could set your body at peace just a little bit, your heart still refused to do so. And you got a feeling it was not because of what was awaiting you at home, but rather because your lawyer stood so close to you. It was his presence that caused you to be all irritated at this moment.
A few memory threads flowed into each other again, and pieces of last night seeped back into your mind… Your hands around his neck, his soft smile, his gentle words, his arms carrying you to the hotel room, his fingers intertwined with yours, his chest pressed against your back in your sleep…
You looked at him, utterly petrified. Had you just cheated on your husband?
“You’re coming?” he asked.
You followed him out of the hotel room and into the elevator. You didn’t say a single word and he didn’t pick up a topic to talk about either, so you just remained silent and avoided eye contact at all cost. You wondered if he felt the same way about your unexpected intimacy from the night before: guilty and ashamed - against yourself.
That was what you would describe it, but it was not what entirely described the bigger picture. Because why else would you have wished not to be still married right now just to have laid in bed with your lawyer for a bit longer?
“Checkout, please,” you heard him say as you stood next to him, totally lost.
Your husband was an attractive man, but your lawyer… You watched his back bend, messy strands falling into his forehead, a crinkled shirt tightening around his chest. A small part of you that had supposedly taken control over you last night, yearned for him in a way you had never yearned for a man before, not even your own husband.
You suddenly broke out in cold sweat and had to look away, fingers gripping tightly onto the jacket in your hand. You were still a married woman, you were not supposed to feel this way about another man yet, even though you didn’t love your husband anymore. You still belonged to him on paper…
“Let’s go.” Your lawyer looked at you, frowning. “Are you okay? You look feverish.”
He wanted to touch your forehead, but you quickly turned your head away. “I’m fine.”
He didn’t believe you, but let it rest. “Fine.”
You trotted after him, feeling torn about what was morally right and the desires that had started to involuntarily get into your head.
____
Something was off at home, because nobody was there.
You and your husband didn’t speak often except for the necessities. Most of the time, he would sleep at his office in the house, coming back late in the night and leaving early in the morning. Sometimes, when it was very late, he didn’t bother to check up on you at all, assuming you were asleep already. For last night, you had just hoped that it was this exact case.
And just as you were standing there in the lobby, kind of lost and still groggy with a slight hangover starting to announce itself, you got a phone call.
“Hey,” you greeted.
“Hey,” your husband greeted back. “I’m sorry I didn’t make it home last night, and I won’t be able to come back today either. There is too much going on in the company.”
You didn’t bother to care anymore, you hadn’t in a long time. You were just relieved that last night didn’t have any consequences. “I understand.”
“Is mother already gone?”
“M… mother?”
Your blood froze and your vision shifted to a silhouette that was just revealing itself in the corner and slowly stepping into the weak daylight. You had judged too early, weighed yourself in safety too fast as there it was, your consequences.
“Yes,” your husband responded. “Don’t you think it was nice of her to spend the night, because she was worried you would be alone after the robbery? Anyway, I have to hang up and get back to work. Bye.”
Your arm slowly slipped down, fingers barely still holding onto the phone as you looked at your mother-in-law like you were facing a ghost.
“By the looks of it, it seems like someone’s had a rough night.”
You did your best to keep your voice low and conceal the trembling tone that came along with your answer, “I was at a friend’s house last night.”
Your mother-in-law snickered and approached you, her face not changing a bit - the result of year long surgeries. She was smaller than you and certainly older, but something so wicked and deeply evil had always been surrounding this woman that even her own sons wouldn’t dare to look into her eyes without permission.
Secretly, she was the one running and pulling the strings behind the company, the entire conglomerate even, stemming from one of the country’s richest families for centuries. At least that was what she liked to tell, but your research didn’t reveal such connections. That didn’t make her appearance less intimidating though as even her own husband looked small next to her.
“Don’t fool me, darling. You don’t have any friends.”
Two years ago, you would have apologized deeply and fallen to your knees, begging for forgiveness, even if it meant kneeling for days. But you weren’t the intimidated girl from shortly after your marriage anymore. Losing your child had shaped you deeply and the divorce was the final stage, not the process - even though you still had weak moments. You decided this wouldn’t be one of them.
“You don’t know anything about me or my life.”
Somehow, you felt mentally so strong right now and straightened your shoulders to present self-confidence, aware of the fact that even though your way through this divorce was not the prettiest and most legal, it was the most effective. And truth to be told, they didn’t deserve a clean divorce anyway.
“I see it written all over your face,” she snarled. “You’ve been with another man.”
This woman didn’t deserve a glimpse of your new, true self at all.
This woman who had told her son, “If you had just waited half a year more, you wouldn’t have had to marry her and we wouldn’t have this burden in our family now.”
And the son who had just answered, “I’m sorry to be such a disgrace, mother.”
And you, the timid girl, you had just sat with them and swallowed every tear, because nobody in this family was supposed to cry - not even after losing your own child.
You wondered if that had been the moment you started slowly losing the love for your husband who you had deeply loved from the first the moment he struck up a conversation with you at the university where he had been invited to as a guest speaker. Three months in, you got pregnant and another three months later, were married.
You had never graduated with your degree, but you hadn’t cared, because you had loved him deeply. For you, it had always been enough - but never for his family. It struck you the moment you had lost your baby and fell from grace.
For two more years, you had wondered whether you could restore the fading love or find another way to feel so deeply again. You had been stuck in a limbo where you questioned if it was some strange form of Stockholm Syndrome you had developed or whether you were just too weak of a person to break free, too afraid to never find love again.
When one night two months ago, you had found your husband all immersed in work and family problems on the death anniversary of your child which he clearly had forgotten about, you had finally figured that he was a simple man who would always be under the control of his mother. There was no need to fight for what had long been lost. You were much stronger alone.
“You are only still here, because a divorce is a disgrace, never forget that and be grateful you have everything you need. Other women would happily trace places with you.”
“Then let them!” It was the first time you heard yourself raising your voice against her. “Let them replace me! You know we don’t love each other anymore, why don’t you let me go then?”
“Oh, darling.” Your mother-in-law stretched out her hand and touched your cheek. It felt ice cold, but you couldn’t move as your body turned to stone. “I would have, but you’re just so easy to keep here, why bother in the first place? I can keep you low and our reputation stored, it’s much better than dealing with a hassle.”
No, you weren’t easy to keep anymore anymore, you were just very good at hiding all of it and keeping up your facade. Maybe before, you would have caved and given in. Maybe before this all, you would have crouched in front of her. Maybe, before you hired your lawyer, you wouldn’t have had these thoughts at all. But only the imagination of him gave you everything you needed to fight back years of suppression.
“I’m not scared of you.”
The slap came unexpectedly, leaving a visible mark on the side of your face. You gasped for air as you held onto the burning skin, your senses not coming together just yet over what had just happened. It felt like the spot got handled with many needles trying to push through a thin layer.
“The next time you’re robbing your own house, make sure to not leave footprints all over the scattered papers, the police might be onto something. I don’t know who’s helping you, if that person is a criminal or your affair, but if you really have some kind of shady thing going on behind my back, I will take you down and your entire family with you.” A threat so sharp that cut through the air like a knife. “Nobody knows about this, so I will do you a favor and keep it between us. If you continue with whatever you’re planning, I promise you, you will regret it deeply.”
Your family… you didn’t know when you had last seen them. You missed them dearly and there was no way you could put them in danger.
That was the only thing you could think of before you snapped back to reality as the entrance door closed behind you.
____
“Who did this to you?”
Your lawyer was kneeling in front of you, inspecting your bruised face with hands so gentle and a gaze so soft, it reminded you all of last night. You were sitting on the couch in his office, legs pulled up to your chest, staring at him but at the same time through him.
“Who?” he asked again as you didn’t respond, this time more insistently. He jumped back to his feet. “Who did this to you? Your husband?! I’m gonna k-”
Reluctantly, you shook your head. “No, it was my mother-in-law. She knows.”
“She knows about what? Whatever she knows, it doesn’t give her the right to physically abuse you!” You had never seen him this agitated and furious before as he walked around his office in a haste, apparently in search of something.
“She knows that I’m onto something… with someone,” you admitted, fearing that he might get angry as you had not been careful enough. “She mentioned my shoe’s footprints over the scattered papers on the ground… I walked all over them, remember?”
“So what?” your lawyer dismissed in an instant. “This doesn’t mean anything. If this divorce makes it to the court, no judge will pay attention to this detail. You live in the house, naturally your footprints will be somewhere.”
You lowered your head, but sensed him walking back to you and pressing something against your cheek, providing instant relief to your burning skin. It was an empty, cold glass. “Sorry, I don’t have anything else here. I hope it helps.”
“Thank you.”
“What else did she say?” he inquired. “Whatever she said, I promise you, in this divorce, I will wring her out until she’s dry and has nothing left anymore. Then, I will push even further, that much I can do.”
“She’s right with everything she’s said to me,” you whispered absent-mindedly, rotating the glass on your skin so that the spot would always meet a cold surface. “I’m so easy to keep, that’s why I’m still there.” It was a paradox to you how a much older and tinier woman had brought up enough strength to hurt you this deeply, inwardly and outwardly. “But what was I supposed to do all this time? I’m from a reputable family and have willingly signed this contract, giving away my rights, my freedom. It was very convenient for them… I was only a convenience that had come along at the right time as their son wasn’t married yet. And then, I couldn’t even bear my child, and it turned me into a disgrace in an instant.”
“Stop!” your lawyer called out, bracing his arms against his desk that then creaked under his weight. His eyes were forcibly closed and there was a huge frown forming on his face. “Don’t ever talk about yourself like this again!”
“But it’s the truth!” you protested. “She may not be in the right, but she is right about me! I willingly agreed to cut off contact with my family, friends, everyone. And then it takes me two years to do something against it! Let’s face the truth…”
“Don’t say that,” he pleaded lowly, his knuckles turning white as he added more pressure to his grip against the desk’s edge. “It’s not like you. You were always so full of hope, in a fighting mode.”
“I still am!” you disagreed. “I still am full of hope and fighting, but let’s face the truth... I’m so young and I will have been through a divorce in the near future. I’ve lost a child, I don’t have a degree, no money for now, no prospects. Who would even want me anymore?”
You didn’t except an answer, it was only a rhetorical question, but he still gave you one,
“Me. I would.”
You heaved up your head, expecting to encounter a grin as your lawyer had just joked around to lift up your spirits in a meek attempt, but as you met his gaze, your breath caught. He was not kidding. He was dead serious, and by now you could quite well distinguish between his serious and joking demeanor.
“Jaehyun…”
His brows drew together, and he eventually broke out in a relieved smile, just a little bit. “Finally, you call me by my first name, even now.”
“Mr. Je- Jaeh-” You shook your head in confusion. You suddenly didn’t know what to think, say or even feel anymore. “Please don’t joke around, now is not the time.”
“I’m offended that you think I’m joking after all this time. I don’t make jokes about that.”
You dropped the glass on the cushion and jumped out of your seat, moving to the other end of the office room, far away from him. You couldn’t bear being so close to him with all that nonsense that he was speaking, because you feared that a big part of you wished for it to become true.
“You know that I am looking for my one true love.”
“Who said it can’t be me?”
“I’m still married to Kang Seungmin.”
“Then I will have to hurry up with the divorce papers.”
“I want to get a degree and open my business before marrying again.”
“I’m willing to support that and wait.”
“You’re so full of life and I’m so broken.”
“Then I’ll bring you back to life too.”
Why did everything he say sound so illogical, yet so tempting? If life was only that easy as he always made it seem with his shady business, maybe there was still hope for you, too. You longed for the lighthearted young woman you had been in the past, and something inside you, maybe the remnants of her, believed that with him, she could find her way back to the surface.
“You don’t understand the depths of my trauma, you cannot love me, Mr. Jeong.” You turned back to the couch and picked up your purse. Walking towards the door, you told him, “I wish we would have met before all of this happened. I wish you would have met me when I was still in university. You would have liked me more back then and my life would have turned out differently.”
“Your life can still turn out differently, because it doesn’t matter when we would have met. I would have liked you all the same.”
You wanted to walk out, but your fingers remained on the door handle, refusing to move. Your cheeks were burning, but on both sides and for an entirely different reason now than shortly before. You were crying hot tears that were streaming down your face. “You don’t know what you’re saying…”
Suddenly, you felt his hot breath against your neck and flinched. But he didn’t touch you, no matter how desperately you wanted it, and you continued to fight against this desire.
“We can also fall in love now, forget about the past and start again.”
“This is what you cannot understand,” you spoke earnestly. “I can never forget about the past, Mr. Jeong. And I refuse to do so, because it’s a part of me and will become a part of my partner too. My current husband has failed to allow this to happen to him.”
Then, your fingers were finally moving and you slipped out of his office. You used the stairs this time, running all the way to the ground floor. Only outside of the building, you were ready to come to a standstill and start breathing regularly again. You were sweating unlike ever before, hot and cold waves washing through your body.
But you continued your way by walking, walking all the way home, whether directly or in circles, you didn’t know. You just kept walking until it was nighttime, until you returned to your house where emptiness was awaiting you.
And as you stood there, alone in the darkness, you wondered how long it would take for it to consume you entirely.
You refused to let it get this far. Not again.
____
A few days later, you were standing in front of a grave that you generally avoided visiting except for only one time a year. The pain was too much to bear alone as nobody had ever bothered to accompany you.
This year, you were here for the second time - but this time you had company.
“I’m sorry if the things I’ve said back then were too insensitive,” Jaehyun apologized. “Just because I’m older doesn’t mean I’m more experienced. Of course I don’t know anything about your pain.”
“That’s why I brought you here,” you told him, your look unwavering from the small tombstone. “I want to share it with you. If you still want to love me after this, then I will believe you.”
…
When you found out that you were pregnant, you weren’t shocked like so many girls your age, who had just entered university, would generally feel.
You were head over heels in love with your boyfriend who, despite your huge age gap and his position in the company, had made it his priority to shower you with gifts and love. That this was considered ‘love bombing’ and ‘grooming’, you would only figure out later. Up until this day, you were still convinced your love for him was real. It just wasn’t your fault that you were an easy target. It was his fault that he had even approached you in the first place as a grown man ten years older than you.
It only took one time for the two stripes on the test to appear. His happiness wasn’t feigned, and neither was yours. Of course you would drop out of university and get married. Marrying into this family would mean to never have to work anymore anyway and only caring for your child and husband. The fact that this was all convenient for a man who couldn’t keep a woman his age and was under so much pressure from his family, you would only figure out later.
It was a shotgun wedding, but of course that wasn’t what was written all over the news. To his family’s luck, you weren’t showing yet and from a reputable background, but you had to hurry up with the wedding nonetheless. You were anticipating this child so much, even though your family tried to sabotage your wedding. That was probably why you were so easy to get talked into cutting off all contact with the people related to you. They didn’t understand you. The fact that they only tried to warn and save you, you would only figure out much later.
You signed away your inheritance, because what was yours was his, and thus for your child and every future child as well, it sounded all logical. You felt loved and cared for unlike ever before. Why be with your unsupportive family when every love and warmth you could find with your husband’s family? Other people looked for love all their lifetime and were unsuccessful. You were lucky to have found the love of your life at an early age.
The fact that the people who told you you were too young to marry were not jealous, but only caring, you would only figure out much later…
… when you were lying in your bed with cramps so bad, you thought you were going to die. Except that it was the child inside of you, who was almost due to be born, was the one dying.
There hadn’t been any signs. He had been healthy. Yet, somehow, his heart had stopped beating.
They took your baby out with a c-section, you had only held him in your arms once. Nobody had shown up to share this incredibly painful moment with you.
This moment that had dragged you into a darkness which would take you years to break free from.
…
“Suddenly,” you continued, speaking to Jaehyun, “I wasn’t the beloved daughter-in-law anymore. I was a disgrace. If I cannot keep a baby, why bother about me? My body cannot function properly, it refuses to act according to nature. Nobody looked at me the same way anymore, not even my husband. While my mother-in-law confronted me with disgust and anger whenever we met, it was disappointment that was mirrored in my husband’s eyes. He wanted to try again, his mother wanted him to. They didn’t give me a moment to mourn my stillborn child.”
“Did he…?” Jaehyun started, unable to speak out the words, but you shook your head.
“She insulted him many times, but he never did anything against my will. We did genuinely try though, I didn’t want to give up on my marriage, but I think my body already had. Sometimes, I caught him lying to his mother that we were trying when we had long stopped. This, I’m grateful for. But it made her hate me even more, because I’m in the wrong as I cannot conceive according to her.”
“This is horrible…”
You stood there, side by side, looking at your baby’s grave. “Sometimes I think he knew what kind of life was awaiting him and chose to not join me. I would have been a horrible mother under these circumstances.”
“He?”
“My baby was a boy.”
“No.” Jaehyun shook his head and suddenly reached for your hand. He was holding it for a long time, before he eventually said, “You would have been the best mom, no matter the circumstances.”
“So why is my baby not with me now?” you sobbed. “Why did it leave me?”
This was a question you were asking yourself over and over again, ever since it had happened. Your therapist had advised you to let go of these thoughts and the guilt, finally breaking free from that darkness by moving on. But you just couldn’t and had stopped going to the sessions from then on. She hadn’t understood the depths of your pain either - or so you had thought.
“Maybe,” Jaehyun started and removed his hand from yours to put it on your shoulder and shift you around to him instead. “Your baby didn’t leave you. Maybe your baby just sensed it wasn’t the right time and is waiting to come back to you when you’re ready again. Then, you’ll see each other again.”
You cried even harder at this point, only slowly realizing that Jaehyun had his arms wrapped around you now, embracing you tightly. Somehow, you had missed someone like this throughout all the years of pain, someone who listened, who was willing to share your suffering, who made it all more durable. Someone who was finally seeing you and acknowledging the depths of your pain.
Had your lawyer been this person all along and it was meant for you to only find him now when you were ready for it?
“I like that thought,” you brought out under tears. “That I will see my baby again.”
“And your baby will also see your family and friends. I will make sure of that.”
“Jaehyun…” He pressed your face against his chest and rested his chin on the top of your head, tenderly brushing over your hair.
“I still want to love you. With all your pain, all your scars. I still want to love you.”
This time, you believed him.
Even more so when you came back to the grave a few days later. You didn’t want to run away anymore. If you freed your pain and didn’t lock it away in an abandoned room, it would grow easier to be a part of your life. That was why you wanted to confront your darkness and pay visits to your baby’s grave more frequently.
… Only to find out that someone had been here shortly before you, leaving a bouquet of fresh lilies.
Jaehyun really wanted to love all of you, past and present.
____
“These are the finished documents.”
Your divorce file was thick. You were sitting at Jaehyun’s desk and were only skimming over the first few pages. Every single paragraph was dissected and laid out very carefully, in every little detail so that no word could be misunderstood.
You didn’t know why you had failed to pay attention to this before, but Jaehyun was incredibly intelligent and determined. He must have worked almost restlessly on these papers and had really meant it when he had said to hurry up with.
“What’s going to happen now?” you asked, hesitant to hear the answer.
“I will send this file to your husband and he will probably consult his own lawyer. Which is legally his right, even if he agrees on everything. Depending on how much he or his family wants to change, it will take months to… years negotiating, going back and forth.”
Years…
You had told Jaehyun to wait until you were a divorced woman. That much respect you still had for your husband, even though you had already taken off your wedding band. And truth to be told, you were still unsure about Jaehyun. It wasn’t a decision you could make overnight at such a state, you had only loved one man in your life so far. Your next choice had to be the right choice, and how could you have already figured out if he was the right choice?
You didn’t want to get married on and off, it wasn’t supposed to be that easy, so you had to be as sure as possible. But then again, you had been fooled once by the love of a man close to your possible future lover’s age. How was it possible you weren’t going to be alluded into a marriage by false promises and hopes again? You might be a bit older and wiser than back then, but did it also apply to your heart?
“This is the toughest part,” Jaehyun continued explaining. "Negotiating. But I will always be by your side, remember that, I will accompany you on every step.”
You wondered whether negotiating with your husband or resisting your lawyer would be harder for you to do in the future.
“Then I will probably need a place to stay during the entire process. I should move to a hotel first and then go from there.”
“There is no need,” Jaehyun dismissed and got up from his chair. “I have a place for you to stay.”
You tilted your head in confusion. “What do you mean?”
“Let’s go.”
You took his car and he drove to a part of the city, far outside of the bustling center, which you hadn’t stepped foot in in years, even though it was close to your current neighborhood. This was where you had grown up, this was where you had spent the majority of your life. This was the area where your parents lived.
The car came to a stop right outside of your family’s house.
“Here we are.”
You turned your head away from the window, the sight of your childhood home causing tears to well up behind your eyes. “I’m not supposed to come here, Jaehyun.”
“Says who?”
“The contract.”
“The contract is bullshit,” he blatantly called out. “Who would have even controlled whether you came here? No one. You could have come here all the time without anyone noticing, you know that. You just… didn’t want to or couldn’t bring yourself to. Am I right?”
He had called you out, and you couldn’t close your ears from the truth much longer. He was right. No one had ever controlled you. Perhaps, they hadn’t had to as by your mother-in-law, you had always been too weak to go against the rules. When you had grown out of this phase though, it was long too late to make amends.
“In the beginning, my family and friends all tried to reach out to me. But whenever we talked, I only heard ‘You’re too young to marry, don’t do it!’, ‘Come home, you don’t need to stay there’, and much more. I dismissed their words, I thought they weren’t happy for me and didn’t understand me. So I eventually cut off any form of communication which was aided by my mother-in-law taking away my phone after catching me calling my mother once. They never knew I was pregnant, I wasn’t allowed to tell anyone. I had a new family who would take care of me, I didn’t need them anymore. Until I was all alone at childbirth and knew I had made the wrong decision.”
“The more you tell me about your in-laws, the bigger my desire grows to unalive them with my bare hands.”
You nervously kneaded your fingers, your gaze fixed on the movements. “It was their form of manipulation, isolating me from everything and everyone that could change my mind and open my eyes to the truth. Eventually, my trauma had done the job. It also made me realize that I am the one to blame too. I could always reach out in other ways, but never did. With time, my guilt grew to such an extent that every form of reconnection would spiral me into much deeper guilt. So I gave up like they have given up on me. It was easier to think this way as I could never forgive myself for the things I’ve said and done.”
“But they’ve never given up on you.”
You shrugged. “You wouldn’t know.”
“Except that I do. Why else would we be here?”
Your head snapped up and you looked at Jaehyun, then outside of the window in the direction of your house where at the same moment, the entrance door opened, that much you could see over the high metal fence surrounding the garden.
“What…” You were lost for words.
“Like you will never stop loving your child, your parents will never stop loving you too, no matter how many irrational decisions you make, no matter how many cruel things you say to them. You will always have their love,” Jaehyun explained slowly so that you could process at the same time. “A few days ago, I looked for them, drove here and explained the situation. But I left out a few important parts as it is entirely your story to tell them. I think you will have a lot to talk about in the upcoming days. Look, they’re waiting for you already.”
It was at this moment that you realized that you had never experienced love in its purest form.
Until now.
And you weren’t referring to your parents as that was another form of love, family love. You weren’t referring to your friends either as that was platonic love. You certainly weren't referring to your husband either as that had turned out to only be conventional love.
You were referring to Jaehyun going through lengths to reconnect you with your family along with many other things. You suddenly weren’t alone anymore. Life suddenly looked so bright and full of hope when you had someone to also share the happy moments with.
You weren’t alluded by false hopes and promises. He was a man of words and actions unlike anyone you had ever met before. And if this wasn’t true love, then what was? There was no guarantee, no glimpse into the future. There was only your heart following a path he shaped for you in the purest form possible, hoping that one day, you would return his feelings.
“Jaehyun, I-”
“Wait.” He cupped your face and smiled when you were facing each other. “It can wait. Go to your parents first. Take your time. Then, you can come to me and tell me everything you want to tell me, alright?”
“Thank you.” And these two words couldn’t even express the entirety of gratitude you felt towards him, among so many other things.
He gave you a kiss on your forehead, then watched you open the door, walking towards your parents.
____
Jaehyun wasn’t having a good day.
In fact, he hadn’t had a good week altogether.
He was grumpy with his employees, sloppy with his files and overall not at the peak of his law-game. His assistant had to point out mistakes in the papers more than several times and was already overly annoyed before he said goodbye for the week, leaving Jaehyun alone in his office.
He missed you incredibly, and it was messing with his usually organized and cool head. Suddenly he caught himself by what he had been trying to avoid all along: emotions caused by love.
Jaehyun had known what it was the moment you went to the bar together, hair flying carefreely around your heated cheeks. Back then, he had only wished to keep the smile on your face forever, it suited you so much better than the stern and calculated look. Having you wrapped in his arms, he had been awake for the majority of the night that followed, thinking about how he could protect you from a world this cruel, a world that had treated you so unfairly all your life, causing you all this pain that nobody should ever endure.
Jaehyun had never been afraid to love, but afraid to admit that he was secretly looking for a lifelong love too, just like everyone else. After all, he was proven every day by wives consulting him that true love was just a misconception and people were mere life partners that eventually parted ways to look for someone new. His job was to break love, not to create it. And now he was finding himself in exactly that state…
… head over heels in love with a woman he never wanted to let go again. A woman whose absence drove him crazy, because every minute he was parted from her felt like a lifetime. Jaehyun certainly had been in love in the past, but he had never gone through these extents for someone outside of his profession.
It made him question his choice of occupation nowadays. And ironically enough, this train of thoughts led him to your husband of whose lawyer he hadn’t heard anything at all. The divorce papers had certainly been delivered to him, but no one had reached out to him in return yet. He made it his mission to take care of this tomorrow.
From the corner of his eyes, Jaehyun saw his office door open and a person walking in, pulling him out of his thoughts. He was currently storing away some files and ready to head home as well.
“We’re closed already, come back tomorrow and make an appointment with my secretary.”
“But I need an appointment right now, Mr. Jeong.”
Jaehyun’s heart nearly jumped out of his chest in happiness when he heard your voice and shifted around. But the woman in front of him didn’t have much in common with the woman who had intruded his office back then.
Instead of pant suits, pencil skirts and high heels, you were wearing a long flowy skirt, a matching blouse and flats. Your hair was falling loosely over your shoulders like the night in the bar, and Jaehyun was sure he had never seen you this beautiful and full of life before. And if it was possible, he loved you even more now.
He dropped the files on the desk and straightened his shoulders. “How was the time with your parents?” he asked, reluctant as to what to do next. He didn’t want to push you, even though there were a million other thoughts in his mind right now and none of them had anything to do with small talk.
“We talked a lot. We cried a lot together, too,” you summarized for him, and he noticed that even your way of speaking had changed. You sounded more confident, but instead of it stemming from your insecurities, it rooted from deep and dripped with sincerity. “It was good, taking a few days off to think about everything.”
“And to what conclusion did you come to?” Jaehyun didn’t know why this question made him so nervous.
A faint smile tugged on the corners of your lips. ”I came to the conclusion that time is too precious to be wasted, Jaehyun. I’ve lost so much time with my parents just because I was weak, and I won’t get it back, nor can I turn it back. I can only do the best with our remaining time from now on. But there is no way I will make this mistake of losing my time with someone I love again.”
Jaehyun took a deep breather, trying to keep his composure. “You wanted to wait until your divorce, until you were sure.”
“I know.” You paused. “But when I thought about what I would regret more… I just couldn’t stand the thought of seeing you moving on, maybe with another woman. And it might be not in your book now, but how do we know what the future brings? I would only regret letting you go without even trying. I was never given a choice, but this, this is my choice. You gave me a choice. And I decided for this, I want this, Jaehyun.”
He cleared his throat and reached for his tie, loosening it a bit as he thought it currently cut off his breathing. “Do you know what you’re saying?” He took a stop towards you. “Be careful.”
You snickered - a tone that sounded like music in his ears - and took a step towards him as well.
“Mr. Jeong, I’m willing to play dirty in private as well. Where do I sign?”
____
Jaehyun wiped his desk free with one hand. Documents, pens, his notebook and even a lamp dropped to the floor, but luckily did not shatter. You let out a gasp, first because you got startled by his impulsive action, and then because he had picked you up and sat you on the desk.
You almost physically felt the electrifying tension between your faces that had built up over the past few weeks, and as your lips came crashing down on each other, it was like sparks flew into every direction to finally celebrate the release of all this pent-up desire.
Jaehyun’s lips were warm and soft, and very demanding. His hands were holding onto your face, angling you up to him as though he wanted you whole, taste, scent and all. Never in your life had you been kissed with so much passion and longing, being claimed in a way a woman could dream of.
You had been intimate only with your husband before, and where lovemaking with him was quiet, lukewarm and quite trite, the onset of the very same act with Jaehyun pushed up too high of what was ever possible in your sole imagination.
You were wild, fiery and loud. Oh, you could have never imagined to be that loud during the act. You threw your head back as Jaehyun kissed your neck, leaving wet trails where his lips passed. Letting out a moan, you spread your legs wider and pulled him close between your thighs. You chuckled silently when you felt him having grown so much already.
Goosebumps covered your legs as you felt him reaching under your skirt and pulling up the fabric. Jaehyun’s hands were roaming over your thighs, moving back and forth across your skin, and you simultaneously grew very hot in places you had long forgotten about. He tugged on the waistband of your panties, his fingers sliding between your folds and slowly rubbing there, causing you to catch your breath because of the intensity of the sensations.
Everything was going too slow for you now, and you wanted all of him all over you, inside of you. An inner voice was screaming desperately after him.
Suddenly, you halted.
“What’s wrong?” Jaehyun asked, worried.
“I… I don’t know how this works anymore.”
“What do you mean?”
“... this. Is it silly?”
You drew your brows together, expecting to be laughed at, but Jaehyun just smiled mildly and tucked a strand of your loose hair behind your ear. How could you have ever thought he’d make fun of you? He never had.
“Nothing is silly. You were just so into it, what’s gotten into your mind?”
“I don’t know if I’m going to be… good. And I have… scars.”
You threw a meaningful gaze at him, hopeful he’d understand without many more explanations, and he did. You wouldn’t be his chosen woman if you weren’t still putting so many thoughts into one single action.
“You still have problems to loosen up,” he concluded. “But don’t worry. If you trust me completely, it will all be fine and I will help you get your head free. So… do you trust me fully?”
It only took you a near-whispered “yes” before he swept you off the desk and carried you, with your thighs tightly wrapped around his waist, to his couch. Not even a minute later, you found yourself with your skirt all draped around your hips and your panties hanging loosely on one of your feet.
You didn’t see Jaehyun’s head anymore, only feeling his hair in a tight grip where your panties should have been, seeing stars dancing across the ceiling that you were currently facing while he ate you out like he had all the time in the world, sensually and delicately.
His tongue dragged along your folds that had long gotten wet the first time his mouth came close to your core. Gone were all your worries and doubts, there was no room to think about anything else than he way he was devouring you now, licking and sucking between your thighs until your eyes rolled back and his name fell from your lips like hurried prayers, interrupting his slurping sounds,
“Jaehyun, Jaehyun, Jaehyun…”
You angled your knees as you felt something tightening inside your lower stomach that you couldn’t pinpoint. It had first started off as a small spark, but was now coiling into something bigger that tugged on every fiber of your body. You were quite sure the fact that Jaehyun sucked on your clit and simultaneously thrusted his fingers inside of you was responsible for this indescribable feeling, more so when he grabbed you by your bare cheeks with his hands and pressed you against his mouth even stronger.
You had had orgasms before. At least that was what you had thought. They had come like a small wave, giving you a pleasant feeling and luring a silent sigh out of you, and that had been it. This orgasm right now though was on a whole other level.
Your whole body tensed up as though trying to protect itself from what was about to come, but no resistance in the world could withstand the persistence of the man who loved you to make you feel good. The coiled up sensation exploded inside of you the moment you thought you were going to die from endless pleasure, and then spread not only into your body, but also mind.
There was no control over how your body reacted, you held onto Jaehyun’s head like a lifeline with your head lolled back, and screamed his name as though in need for help, your body leaking fluids in places you would have been originally embarrassed for, but Jaehyun loved it, every single reaction he was able to lure out of you.
Underneath him didn’t lie the uptight, suppressed woman anymore, in pantsuits and with no hair out of place. It was a new woman he had now unraveled, with wild hair, heated cheeks, liberated and eager to explore worlds she had never set foot into before. And he would guide her all the way into his world.
With a grin, Jaehyun wiped over his smudged mouth while you were still trying to catch your breath, but eventually returned his expression, ready for more. His fingers were trembling a bit when he first got rid of your skirt and then unbuttoned your flowy blouse.
A flash of concern ran through your face in the blink of a moment when he undid the last button, but he understood. He helped you out of the garment, and when you eventually laid back again in front of him, bare-chested and naked from head to toe, he saw.
Jaehyun left no room for you to mistrust him though. Undressing himself from head to toe first, he then kneeled in front of you on the cushion and leaned in. With warm fingers, he reached out to your lower abdomen and then gently touched the spot of which you had been so afraid to let him see.
But the c-section-scar was a part of you and Jaehyun loved every single bit. “You’re so beautiful,” he let out, and you believed every single syllable.
He had you tightly embraced with your legs around his waist when he slowly but deliberately pushed into you. At first, it hurt quite a bit, because you hadn’t had been this intimate in so long, but when it showed on your face with a frown, Jaehyun paused and made sure you still truly wanted this with soft kisses on your temple and mouth, so that the tightness vanished almost right away.
He was settled inside of you, thick, full, and pulsing, and even though this was so much for you to take already, you wanted him to move, needed him to move. When he didn’t instantly do so though, you nearly embarrassingly pushed up against him and tried to get a tiny bit of gratification by yourself.
Jaehyun laughed lowly and kind of threateningly. “Take deep breaths first, because you are in for a long ride.”
You winced when he pulled out and only let his tip remain, because you feared he would stop right here, but then met him with a breathless gasp when he slammed back into you full force. It cost you all the air in your lungs, but you needed him to do it again as well, because it had hit a spot you had always been convinced had never existed for you in the first place.
But it did. And Jaehyun penetrated it with every thrust that he alternated between fast and shallow and slow and deep. The couch’s cushion got wet and sticky under you, and your screams only grew louder too, but you didn’t mind and didn’t care, especially not when he suddenly flipped you over and you were sitting on him, having him sheathed deep inside your core.
“You’re so beautiful”, Jaehyun repeated. He stretched out his hand and curled a lock of your hair between his fingers that he then slid down along your breast, scar and let it eventually rest on your hip. “Ride me,” he then pleaded, “ride me, please.”
Despite the fact that you had never done that before, the motions came to you naturally with the guidance of his grip around your waist. It felt good for you to decide how deep and in which angle you wanted to have him, and as you were sliding along him, you felt another orgasm nearing that you unfortunately failed to chase.
“Out of breath?” Jaehyun asked, lids heavy after enjoying this sight too much.
“I want to cum again,” you confessed, “but somehow…”
Jaehyun returned to his former position, but this time, placed either of your legs across his left and right shoulder. You didn’t know what else he was doing, but when he filled you all up from the inside again, you were feeling him so deeply and intensely like never before.
The second orgasm for this day found its root not in the pit of your stomach, but feeded on every inch of your body, so that it was an experience that left you shaking with all limbs, Jaehyun following along in long spurts across your stomach.
“I’ve never imagined sex to be like this,” you admitted when you laid in his arms shortly later, a thin blanket draped over you. The office had long closed.
“Like what?” Jaehyun asked and kissed your temple.
“So good.”
He laughed and pulled you closer to him. “That was not even my best performance yet, trust me.”
You opened your mouth in wonder. “You can do it even better? I can hardly believe it.”
“You want to try?” he challenged. “Don’t worry, we have all the time in the world to try out everything you want.”
“Okay,” you agreed. “All the time in the world, for sure. But maybe we can still start with it tonight. You never know-”
You didn’t have to call out to him twice before he disappeared under the blanket.
____
“I must say, I’m impressed. I didn’t expect this from you.”
The photos landed in front of your feet.
They showed everything.
Jaehyun and you entering your home dressed all in black, Jaehyun and you leaving the bar together, Jaehyun and you in the car in front of your parents’ house, Jaehyun and you coming out of his office at different occasions. There were even photos from yesterday after you both had…
You stood in the living room, petrified, not even your eyes were able to move to look directly at the person that was approaching you.
“You must wonder how much truth someone can spill when you just offer them more bribery money than the original party,” your mother-in-law said. “Needless to say, the security guard no longer needs his job here after providing me with the respective videos. And the rest was the dedicated work of my private detective. I sensed that something was off and hired him shortly after reading the police report on the seeming robbery.”
When you eventually lifted up your head, she stood there, looking at you with much disgust. It was at that moment that you realized you lost. She was holding the divorce papers in her hands. They had never reached your husband first, but had directly landed in her hands instead.
“I don’t care,” you sighed deeply. “I don’t care anymore. I will sign anything, I am willing to lose everything. Just… let me go. Please, just let me go.”
You didn’t want the money, you didn’t need it. Money would come back, but time didn’t, and every bit of energy you still invested in this family felt like you were losing a bit of your lifespan. You just wanted to leave and live a life dedicated to your loved ones from now on.
“Fine.” You halted, waiting for her to continue as you could almost not believe what she had just said. It couldn’t be so easy. “I am willing to let you out of this marriage, under one condition.”
Of course there would be. “What?”
“I’ve dedicated my entire life to keeping this family together,” she elaborated, “and my hard work paid off when I married off my first son well, making him the CEO of the conglomerate at the same time. My second one… well, he was always a little too spoiled and never under as much pressure as his older brother. But I let it pass, because as long as our reputation didn’t get stained, I wouldn’t look at it twice. I now wish I had as he only grew foolish and reckless. How else would he have gotten the idea of falling in love and getting an almost teenager pregnant out of wedlock?”
“This fact, we can agree on. But it was your fault that he grew up the way he is now,” you stated in defense. “He has never learned to deal with emotions, and whenever problems occurred, you were there to clean it all up regardless of the people getting hurt along the way. It was partially your family’s responsibility to make sure I was taken care of accordingly. The moment we married, I was your responsibility, too.”
Your mother-in-law screwed up her nose. “I did take care of these things my way.”
“And they were wrong!” you raised your voice, hoping that somehow, you could still speak some sense into her. “You pressured me to sign a contract of which its repercussions I could not have known at that time yet. It was my right to consult a lawyer, but I was never given a choice just like your son has never been given a choice. I was only nineteen and stripped of all my future!”
“A child out of wedlock would have destroyed everything I’ve worked so hard for,” she pressed through her gritted teeth, reluctant to admit this. “I did it all to protect my family!”
You shook your head. “And look at that family now. Was it all worth it? Was it worth the life you’re living right now?”
She didn’t know the answer to that apparently. “If you had only borne that child like my son wanted so desperately too, the problems would have all dissolved themselves. I would have endured you. Maybe you could have been a happy little family after all. But even for that, you were too weak.”
It stung. The insults pierced right through your heart, but you remembered Jaehyun’s words, and only grew from there. “No, we wouldn’t have been. I would have taken the child and filed for a divorce nonetheless, I know that now.”
“You ungrateful brat!” the elderly woman suddenly yelled. “Do you know how many girls out there would trade places with you? You’ve gotten everything someone could ever ask for, and for you it’s not enough!”
“Because there is more to this world than money and reputation!” you screamed back. “It’s not my fault you have failed to see it while you still had a choice, too!”
You were never able to forgive her, that much was true. But somewhere under her hard facade, you were sure, was hiding a young woman who had once dreamed big too. A young woman your age, who had dreamed of the love of her life and her own business. A young woman, who had been robbed of these dreams way too early and had never been given a choice either.
But that young woman had failed to escape as long as she still was able to, and got replaced by a monster that couldn’t figure its way out anymore, too entangled in a vicious circle that got passed on from generation to generation.
You wanted to break the circle and make your own choices. Perhaps, if you hadn’t gone through the past two years, you wouldn’t have had enough courage to feel like this now. Perhaps, if you hadn’t gone through the past two years, you would have turned out like her.
The trauma had made you weak, but also much stronger at the same time. You still didn’t understand, but in some way, you were grateful.
And the fact that you were now able to walk away was the reason you would always and forever remain superior to your mother-in-law.
“You must really love that lawyer of yours,” she eventually broke through your thoughts. “I just wonder how far you are willing to go for him to fulfill your condition?”
____
“Did you get your important papers?” Jaehyun happily greeted you when he opened the door to his office. “You’re back so early, is everything okay?”
The moment you hurried in his direction, he immediately knew that something was wrong. He put his index finger under your chin and angled up your head. The way your entire world shattered when he forced you to hold your gaze indicated that nothing would ever be okay again.
“You have to leave, Jaehyun,” you insisted and grabbed onto his arms. “Right now.”
He didn’t ask any questions, but trusted you fully on that. “Okay, let me just get my-”
“No.” You shook your head. “The country. You have to leave the country immediately.”
Now, he was stunned. “I don’t understand.”
“My mother-in-law knows everything,” you uttered with a trembling voice. You told him about all the bribery and the detective, and eventually about her ultimatum. “She has collected a record of illegal activities reported against you, and she will go to the police with all of it to file a charge of your criminal activities. They have connections there, Jaehyun. She promised me if she wants, she will get you in jail. Is it true? Everything on the list?”
You recited a few bullet points you had been able to remember in a whim the short moment she was holding the paper in front of you. You directly saw it in his eyes, that fact that everything was as bad as it sounded. Robbery, data corruption, forgery, lying in front of the court… you named it.
“Oh god…” You needed a moment and sat down on the couch. “Jaehyun, she can really put you in jail!”
“Then I’ll leave the country!” he instantly caved. “We can live in New York or LA instead. I’ll book the next flight, we don’t need anything. We will just start anew.”
But by your expression alone, he understood that this was only wishful, silly thinking. Only one of you could be free, and you weren’t willing to trade his freedom for yours. He had always been free, you had always been caged. You didn’t rob the person you loved of their freedom like your husband had done.
“No… Don’t make that face. You’re not gonna stay married to him.”
“Jaehyun…”
He sank on his knees in front of you, taking your hands into his. “Then I will go to jail if it means you can get divorced to your advantage. How many years can I get anyway? I did many things wrong in the past and I don’t want to be this kind of person anymore. I will legally atone for my crimes. If it means that you’re going to be free and live a happy life, then I am willing to do so.”
“I won’t ever be able to live a happy life if it is without you. I don’t care about my money or my business anymore, Jaehyun. It will all come back, I still have time for this stuff. None of these matter now. What I care about is you. I won’t allow them to take you away from me. They took so much from me already. I can’t lose you too and rip you of your future and prospects like they did with me. It’s not worth it.”
“But I’m worth it?” he asked breathlessly. “How do you know? How do you know you won’t regret everything again?”
You wrapped your fingers around his neck and pulled him nearer to you. “Because you were willing to understand my pain and connect to my past. Because you left flowers on my baby’s grave and reunited me with my family. Because without you, I wouldn’t have had the courage to do all this. Nobody has ever gone through such lengths for me. If this is not true love, then I don’t want to live in a world this deluded.” You pressed your forehead against his. “And because I truly love you too, Jaehyun, I am willing to sacrifice this all.”
He reluctantly added, “There is another way out… There must be.”
There was a hint of a faint smile on your face. “There is not.”
“There is always!” he opposed, almost desperately.
Jaehyun sank onto the cushion next to you and buried his face in his palms. Was that what defeat felt like? He had expected it to hit him hard and knock him off his feet like a wave. Instead, defeat felt like drowning. Slow, torturous drowning.
“Perhaps, but not now, not for us. If only we had been given a bit more time… But I was selfish and pushed too far, and if you don’t leave the country now, you will go to jail. And if I leave with you, then all my beloved ones will pay the price, too. The damage would be more collateral. I cannot allow this to happen, so I will stay.”
“Promise me you won’t stop fighting.” He looked at you through heavy-lidded eyes. “That you will still fight for your freedom with every help you can get. Promise me you will never give up.”
You were trying so hard to keep your composure, but ultimately all your walls broke and you were crying hot tears in Jaehyun’s arms. He held you tightly for what might be the last time ever as you repeated,
“I will keep fighting.”
____
Jaehyun had made a decision.
For that decision, he was currently collecting every tiny piece of evidence possible from his entire career as a divorce attorney.
He had always been very structured, detailed and thorough with his records, which was why it didn’t take him long to find stuff that would be enough to lock him up for years. And he kept digging so as to not leave room for the police to find more than he would hand over. If he came clear with everything and turned himself in, punishment wouldn’t be so hard and he could see you again in a few years time.
You didn’t want this, he knew, but in a hopeless situation, this was the scenario that was the most hopeful.
Ironically, Jaehyun thought to himself, he had never been a person full of hope before meeting you.
“Can I come in?”
A monotonous male voice interrupted him, and he absent-mindedly answered, “I’m busy and we’re already out of the office hours. Come back tomorrow.”
“I just assumed you might want to read through these papers right now, checking whether I signed everything right.”
Jaehyun had never heard your husband’s voice in real life before, but now that he had and looked up from his desk, he found it really matched his face. It was dull and boring, even though he was a conventionally good-looking, well groomed man in his early thirties - that much he was able to judge objectively considering he hated him to the core.
“I don’t know whether you’re stupid or brave coming here,” Jaehyun said coldly. “I’ll just freely assume it’s both.”
Mr. Kang let a bag, that Jaehyun only noticed now, drop on the floor, not reacting to his taunt at all. By your stories alone, he already got the impression that your husband wasn’t a man of many words… or emotions and expression at all.
“Inside here are a few clothes, her documents, ID and passport. She wanted to get these this morning, right? And here are the signed divorce papers.” He dropped the staple on Jaehyun’s desk. “I’ve already consulted my lawyer. Whatever she’s asking for, she will get. I will agree on everything.”
Jaehyun drew the paper across the surface closer to him. He turned a few pages and realized that no alterations had been made so far. And Mr. Kang’s signature was right there as well.
“Where did you get this?”
“What my mother has gotten into her hands was a mere copy. The original documents had been handed over to me by the messenger the same day you had sent them out. I apologize that it took me so long. It was a decision easily made, but not easy to get through with my family. But my brother was very supportive and still is. My mother on the other hand, not so much when she will find out tomorrow. I’ll deal with it.”
Jaehyun closed the documents again and heaved up his head. “So… that’s all?”
“No.” Mr. Kang quietly shook his head, continuing with his initial monotonous tone, “I cannot prevent her from filing a police report against you, and knowing her, she will directly do so first thing in the morning when I confront her with the facts. That’s why you have to make haste and leave the country. Here.” He placed a very obvious plane ticket on the desk that was booked under Jaehyun’s name, dated for today still.
It was not the first time Jaehyun was hearing these words, yet he stood by his decision. “I won’t leave like a coward. I will cooperate and get the punishment I deserve.”
“You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into,” Mr. Kang said, a little more emotion in his voice now. “Do you think when you get released, it will all be over? It’s only going to start from then on. You will not only lose your practice license, but everyone dear to you too. You will never have a day of peace, and therefore, she won’t either. You don’t want that life for her.”
Again, Jaehyun felt hopelessness choking him. He was willing to suffer the rest of his life for all of his wrongdoings if he must. He just didn’t want to drag you down with him. “What should I do?”
“Go far, far away from here. Don’t leave any trace and wait until the divorce is finalized until you let her come to you. I guess you have partners or assistants that can take over the legal parts for you in your firm. Anyway, I will make sure we will push through with the contract that you have set up.”
Jaehyun knew this was the silver lining in a near desperate situation. “Can I still tell her goodbye?”
“If you want to ever see her again, then you must leave right now. The plane departs at midnight.”
“How do I know I can trust your words?”
“Indeed, there is no way you can. But you don't have a choice.”
“Can I at least trust you to make sure she will be alright until she can come to me?”
“Yes,” Mr. Kang confirmed, and for the first time, Jaehyun could make out a clear expression etched into his face. Relief? “After all, I have given her a promise at our wedding. I will keep her safe until it’s all over. You’re not the only one, I want to atone for all my mistakes too. I just want you to know that I have truly loved her. I just wasn’t capable of showing up when I was needed. So I’m happy for her that someone is now.”
“I think this is something you have to tell her in person yourself. And many more things, probably.”
Mr. Kang nodded.
It was not Jaehyun’s place to judge other people’s relationships. What you had truly felt for each other at one point in your lives, it was up to you both to make out with yourselves - or not. Jaehyun just didn’t want you to hurt any longer. Everything else was irrelevant to him.
“Don’t expect a thank you, Mr. Kang.”
“I’m not. I’m not expecting anything from you, Mr. Jeong.”
Jaehyun hurriedly grabbed the most important documents from his desk and the shelves all while preparing to drop by at his home real quick to pick up his passport. “Can you tell her something from me? Or not… whatever you want to do.” He had seldomly felt so at a loss for the right words. “If you are willing to pass on my message though… She will arrive here soon and I need to be gone by then... Tell her to not come and say goodbye. I will contact her when it’s safe. I hope it won’t take long.”
“This, I will do,” he confirmed. “For her.”
____
Jaehyun had only packed a small bag with a few clothing pieces, some cash and important documents, nothing more. The papers he was taking with him included a specific file that gave him access to a secret bank account in another country into which he had booked different amounts of money any time he won a case. It wasn’t as much as his real asset, but it came close and was definitely enough to start anew somewhere else.
“Do you carry any liquids in your bag, sir?”
Jaehyun shook his head. He had already put his bag and jacket on the tray, patting his pockets one last time to look for remaining items he still had to get rid of before passing the security.
“Jaehyun!”
Brushing it off as an intrusive thought, he continued with his motions, until he heard again, this time from a clearly familiar voice,
“JEONG JAEHYUN! HOW DARE YOU!”
When he turned around, he caught you verbally fighting with the employees who checked the board pass before passengers moved on to the security. “Let me go, I have to talk to that person!”
“You need a ticket to pass through here, ma’am,” one of them carefully explained to you, flinching any time you made a move as he surely couldn’t estimate your outburst.
“Fine! Then I’ll buy one! Hurry up!”
“To buy a ticket, you have to go the counter and-”
“I don’t have time for that. Jaehyun!”
He didn’t have enough time to process everything of the scenario that was now unfolding in his sight. You really dared to push one employee aside who then stumbled into the other one’s arms. And before they could catch onto what was currently happening to them, you had already dropped your purse, gripped the railing with two hands and just jumped over the barricade like it was nothing.
In the background, Jaehyun perceived how the employees slowly caught onto the happenings after the initial shock and apparently called for backup with their walkie-talkies. Luckily, the TSA hadn’t caught wind of your unruly behavior yet as both sections were partially separated by walls, so Jaehyun left everything on the tray behind and ran towards you as you were doing the same.
Quickly, he grabbed your hand and dragged you to one corner of the hall, right between these two airport sections, where it would take either party the longest time to arrive.
“Why are you here?” Jaehyun asked, nearly out of breath when you came to a standstill. “You’re supposed to pick up your bag from my office and go to your parents’ house!”
“I know but I couldn’t!” You squeezed his hand. “You were really going to leave without giving me a chance to say goodbye? How dare you!”
“I’m sorry, I just…” Only when he was at the check-in, it had dawned on him that he had made the wrong decision. Even if your husband had warned him, he should have taken that risk. That much, you owed the person you loved. “I’m just not good at saying goodbye. I didn’t know what to say… even now, I don’t know.”
“Please don’t do this! Don’t strip me of my choice! Not you too!”
Jaehuyn shook his head and cupped your face. “I would never do that! I would have called or texted you right when I arrived. Even if it was risky. I just cannot bear… yeah, this. I didn’t want to see you cry again. This time it’s my fault.”
With his thumbs, he brushed over your cheeks, wiping away your tears. From the corners of his eyes, he already saw the fetched security arriving at the section, looking in your direction. There was not much time left anymore.
“This is my choice,” you said under tears. “You are my choice. And if you don’t come back, Jaehyun, I will fly over there myself, are we in the clear?”
He chuckled and you cracked a faint smile as well. “I believe you. I don’t think we need a contract for that. It may take a bit of time… so will you wait for me?”
“I will always wait for you. That’s what I said, right? I will wait for my true love, no matter how much time it takes. Just please, if you can, don’t take too long.”
Jaehyun wrapped his arms around you and pressed you against his chest. The security was already approaching you, but they weren’t running, possibly because they had already sensed there was no danger radiating from you. Just two people in love who needed to say one last goodbye to each other.
“I’ll hurry up,” he muttered into your hair and placed a kiss on your parting. “In the meantime, go back to university, get your degree and work hard for your business, but don’t forget to live your life, too. I want to return in time for your graduation ceremony.”
“Jaehyun…” You looked up to him with big, tear-filled eyes. “Then I will work hard so that it won’t take long.”
Eventually, the security reached them. “Ma’am, we have to kindly ask you to leave.”
Jaehyun let go of you before the two security men would drag you away from him themselves, and you unwillingly let him. “I promise I’ll be there!”
“I rely on your word!” you were still able to say before following the security out. “I love you!”
“I love you too.”
____
Police investigations started shortly after Jaehyun landed in the US. They were looking for him the next two years, and you had to stay apart for just as long.
He missed the moment you finalized your divorce after a year.
He missed the moment you re-entered university that same year.
He missed the moment you graduated with your degree a year later.
He missed every single important moment in your life.
____
‘GRAND OPENING’
was written on the fancy border that hung over the entrance door to your small shop.
You hadn’t expected for five people to already show up at the opening hour sharp, but you were well prepared and handed them a glass of champagne each. You walked them around, presenting to them a few of your hand-picked pieces.
There were gowns with reserved, classic cuts, more elaborate gowns with a lot of tulle, short skirts, long sleeved dresses, tight and wide dresses, and a broad selection of accessories like veils and gloves in addition.
“My heart lies within this shop,” you explained to the group of women. “I want to gather as many different styles as possible to suit everyone’s preferences. After all, it’s going to be the happiest day of your life, and you shouldn’t only look beautiful, but also feel comfortable. Whatever you want to add or alternate on your overall look, me and my team will accommodate that. Please feel free to look around and call for me if you need my assistance.”
You moved behind the counter and looked excitedly at your first possible customers, being happy to share this day with the people special to you too as later on, your family and friends would pay you a visit for the official opening party.
There was always one person missing though, and whenever you thought of it, your heart got so heavy.
The opening of your own bridal shop was another milestone in your life that Jaehyun was missing. Even though two months ago it was announced that the Aewha Group had gone bankrupt because of a tax fraud having been committed over the years, he had still deemed it unsafe to return and wanted to wait a bit more.
You wondered why and slowly grew impatient as the police had already stopped pushing the case forward because of the lack of evidence as almost no one wanted to testify against him. Since the Aewha Group was now down as well and the owners had a fair share of other, graver problems to deal with, you had proposed to him to come pay you a visit.
“It’s too dangerous,” Jaehyun had said.
“Then I’ll come!”
Again, he had said, “You don’t have to. Soon, I can return.”
But when was ‘soon’ anyway as he’d been saying it for a year already?
In secret, you had already bought a plane ticket to California for next month. Two years had already passed in which you couldn’t see each other, and if it continued, then you would be the one to go to jail for other reasons, you knew that, and those reasons included kidnapping the man you loved.
After an entire day of working where you had been successful to make fitting appointments with three bridal groups, it was time for the opening party. You saw your parents, grandparents, friends and other acquaintances, not only from the past, but also from the last two years, walk into your shop, gazing at the garments and celebrating with you.
There were beverages and snacks being served, everyone was dressed up and music was playing in the background. It was a gathering among the people close to you to celebrate the success you had been working so hard for the past two years.
You knew that, if you hadn’t met a certain person, you wouldn’t be standing here right now, giving a speech to your loved ones. But after all the trauma and pain, you were here, bright and successful with a future just as promising.
You just wished the person you were the most grateful for could have joined as well.
“Thank you so much for coming and celebrating with me. Please enjoy tonight,” you ended your speech.
“There is something I have to say too,” someone said in the background, and the hair on your neck suddenly stood up. “Actually, there is so much I have to say, but I will try to keep it short.”
Only after a few seconds, you were able to break through the petrification. From the corner of your peripheral, you saw your friends giggling and your parents looking at you lovingly. Before you met his gaze eventually, tears already started to burn on the rim of your eyes.
You felt his warm hand on your naked arm, his fingers slowly sliding down to intertwine with yours. It had been so long since you had last seen each other in person, but as you now stood in front of Jaehyun, it felt like no time had passed at all.
He was just as handsome and well built as two years ago. If anything, he looked even better. Maturity suited him so well. He was smiling at you, but you couldn’t bring yourself to mirror his expression with the same intensity, because different emotions washed over you all at once, so that you didn’t know how to feel at first.
You wanted to get angry at him and yell at him why it had taken him so long.
You wanted to wrap your arms around his neck and have him hold you tightly.
You wanted to kiss him deeply and get undressed to feel every inch of him.
In the end, you didn’t do anything but start crying. It was all just too much.
“Why are you here?” you asked, still believing it was all not real.
You felt him squeezing your fingers. “I just couldn’t miss another milestone of yours.”
“Why did it take you so long?”
“There were a few things I needed to sort out before I could return. Finding someone to take over my law office, for example. Just the formals.”
“Why didn’t you tell me, you idiot? I bought a ticket for next month!”
He threw his head back and laughed. “That’s what I sensed and came here as fast as possible.”
“How long are you going to stay?” you sniffed.
“This time, I hope forever.” You saw him move in your blurry vision and blinked through your tears. Or better say, you saw it blinking in front of your eyes as he was holding a ring in front of you. “If you let me be your husband, of course. So… will you? Will you accept me as your husband?”
You pouted. “Where are we going to live?”
“Here, of course.”
“And you’re not on the run anymore?”
“I will only do stuff according to ethics, morals and the law.”
“Can I plan the wedding myself?”
At this point, you were only teasing him, but after what he had put you through, he let you. “You can do whatever you want, I will say yes to everything my wife says.”
“Very well.” You paused. “Under one condition.”
“Hm?”
Then, you broke into a wide smile. Those tears on your face had always only been happy tears. “We will never set up a prenup.”
“Of course,” Jaehyun agreed. “Because we will never get divorced anyway.”
Then, you finally fell into his arms and kissed him deeply. It was like two missing pieces coming together, a surge of complete bliss streaming through your bodies the moment your lips met. This, this was it. This was what it must feel like to finally be with your true love. You never wanted to be apart again.
The ring looked beautiful on your finger, and as you both turned around to show it to your guests, you saw in their reactions that they had been let in on the planned happenings of this night quite a while ago.
Your opening party had magically turned into your engagement party.
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CUNNILINGUIST ― s.jy (ft. p.sh)
Unfortunately for you, no man has ever given you some good head. Fortunately for you, your best friend is more annoyed by it than you are. It’s just a favor, right? or the one where your best friend jake eats you out as a way to admit his own feelings for you, also, apparently sunghoon existing is an issue.
minors dni! | kindly leave feedback and reblog to give bestie jake conflicting feelings
WORDCOUNT― 16.1 k
PAIRING― jake x afab reader (ft. sunghoon)
CONTENT― a lot of waiting, like to the point it even annoyed me, very fluffy stuff , typical best friends to fuck buddies to “actually, I had feelings this whole time”, jealousy, jake is whiny and needy when he’s horny, reader thinks it’s cute. angst if you’re a baby about it
OTHER CHARACTERS― sunghoon as the mutual friend who bangs reader
NOTE― this was originally written by me on my other blog [@/ncteez], if you’ve read it before, that’s why!
smut tags under cut::
smut tags― BIG DICKED BESTIE, pussy eating (he gets IN THERE), masturbation in the form of dry humping a mattress and then into his hand, finger fucking, cum eating, sunghoon hook up, morning sex, lazy fingering, lazy fuck, dirty talk , unprotected sex, awkward build up,raw grinding, no blowjob in sight sorry lmao, deep penetration, cream pie, kind of cum stuffing but like not entirely intentional, cheesy love stuff
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
“What? Again?” Jake says, leaning back against the couch with a groan and a smack to his own forehead.
“Yeah, so basically he went down on me for less than a minute but expected me to, like, go long enough to ‘swallow’ or whatever.” You continue the story in a frustrated huff, shaking your head in self-pity.
Jake groans louder, leaning himself forward again and swiping his drink from your coffee table to take a long and thoughtful sip.
“How many times is that, then?” He says between sips, glancing around the room as if he’s in deep thought. “I can’t help but think you pick these kinds of guys on purpose at this point.”
You look at him in mock pain, grabbing his drink and taking your own thoughtful sip of it.
“I dunno, they always talk big game during phone sex and stuff. I figure eventually one of them will live up to it.” You drone on, internally marking your recent date’s name off of your call-back list.
“Be honest with me, have you ever actually gotten good head? Like how would you know if they’re bad if you have nothing good to compare them to?” Jake asks, letting you mindlessly drink his beverage.
It’s not weird to be having these types of conversations with him, if at all, something would seem off if you didn’t. He’s the only person in your life that you’ve ever felt this close to. At this point, you think he’d have to chase you down with a bloody hatchet for things to be awkward. Which is…kind of interesting, you guess.
“Well, I mean,” You think for a moment too long for his liking, but he gives you the space to finish your answer. “It feels good and all but it’s not like I’ve ever gotten off by it.”
“Correction –” Jake starts, blinking right at you. “You’ve never been given the chance to get off on it.” His bright smile shows through his words, and you’re sure he’s mocking you at this point.
“Yeah, yeah. Yada, yada. I have terrible taste in sexual partners but to be fair, it’s not like the pool is that big to choose from.”
He nods in agreement, humming as if to end the conversation and still watching you sip at his drink.
“Would you be opposed to–” He pauses, making eye contact with you. “Y’know, I could do it for you.”
You pause, nearly dropping his drink out of your hand but thankfully your grip actually tightens on it instead. You swallow as you look at him, searching his face to see if this is some kind of joke.
“Jae-fucking-yun,” You deadpan, sitting his cup back down on your coffee table and leaning toward him, staring him down. “You’d really do that, for me?”
You bat your eyelashes at him, mostly playing it off as a half-joke just to see if he’s fucking with you or not.
“How else are you gonna experience it?”
You stare him down harder.
“You say that like you’re some sort of pussy-eating-god,” You narrow your eyes. “Are you?”
He shrugs casually with his little smile, leaning back on your couch and stretching his arms out. One of his hands lands behind your shoulder and you lean into it.
“I’d let you be the judge of that if you’re up for it.”
Finally, you decide that he’s definitely not joking and you’re definitely gonna do it because like, that’s your best friend. Experiencing your firsts with him comes almost as naturally as walking. You had your first kiss with him, albeit it was a dare. You experienced your first concert with him, your first break up, your first failed exam, and even your first legal drink in a club. What’s so bad about letting him eat you out?
“Right now?” You ask, quirking your brow and tilting your head.
“Now, tomorrow, next week. Whenever.” He runs his hands through his hair as he says it and only now are you starting to really tune into his features that you’ve already found handsome.
Day after day you’ve seen him on this couch and in other states of dress without really thinking twice about how his lips would feel on you (despite that short first kiss). You’ve seen him kissing all up on other people, you’ve seen him in the club with wet lips from alcohol, you’ve seen him all messy and eating spaghetti at his parent’s house– but for some reason, his lips seem different now. His sleepy eyes seem different, his messy hair seems like something that should be tugged on, his fucking jawline–
“Why’re you staring at me like that?” He looks at you up and down as if he’s judging. “You wanna go right now?”
You nod slowly, letting the traces of any lusty thoughts you’ve had about him in your life come to the front in waves. Then you quickly shake your head.
“Wait, no,” You roll your eyes more at yourself than him. “I haven’t showered since my date, maybe I should, uh…”
“Uh – yeah. Please do.” He grimaces, that same dopey smile coming back after a moment.
“Fair.” You roll your eyes. “Gonna go shower then.”
Part of you wonders if like, he’s being totally legit. For all you know, you’ll get out of the shower and he’ll be too busy doing something else, or like, he’ll go home or something. No hurt in seeing though.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
In the bathroom, you can’t help the feeling in your chest at even the thought that this may be about to happen.
Excitement. That’s what you feel. Not because it’s Jake. Well, maybe a little bit because you wanna see what his tongue is all about but more so because you’re about to get some presumably good head.
You shower thoughtfully, cleaning every part of your body and feeling little goosebumps rise and fall with each sensation of your air conditioning snaking its way past your shower doors. When you get out, you lotion your body so you’re all nice and soft and brush your teeth just in case things go a little further. You’re not expecting it to, but y’know, nothing wrong with having fun if it comes to it.
After all, he’s doing you a favor by going down on you, the least you can do is smell good, be soft, and totally prepared for if he were to suggest more, right? Right. Anyway, you’re all showered up and opt to just let your hair do its own thing as you throw on your shirt and shorts. You ignore the panties at this point, because why not?
When you get back to the living room, Jake isn’t there. Naturally, you check your bedroom and there he is, still his normal self and lounging against your headboard while flipping through videos on his phone.
“And she’s back,” he comments, reaching a hand out as if to invite you to your own bed. “Change your mind yet?”
“Not even for a second,” you smile as you take a spot in front of him, your entire body facing him as you pull your knees up and lay your chin against your arms. “Have you?”
He seems to fall into a more serious tone now, locking his phone before tossing it to the side and flicking his eyes up to look at you, scanning your legs in the shorts.
“No,” he chokes back, shocked to see straight between the gap of your shorts and actually lay eyes on the point of this whole situation for the first time. “And you’re not wearing anything under those shorts.”
You watch his face and the way it turns from your best friend into something you’ve seen time and time again from men you’ve gone home with. It’s sexy on him though, for some reason.
“Figured I’d save you the trouble?”
He smiles, now moving himself toward you and reaching a hand behind to cradle your head.
“Lay back,” he says softly, in a voice you’ve only heard a few times from him, “you could have left the shorts off too though.” He adds with an even softer laugh.
For some reason, it makes you feel shy. His hand guiding you to lay back all while grabbing the pillow from behind him and placing it under your head so that you’re nice and comfortable. You watch him look at you and honestly, it’s in a way you can’t remember him ever looking at you before. If this is how he looks at other women, you may be a little jealous.
It feels more intense right now than you thought it would.
“You’re being weird.” You say offhandedly, looking away from him and trying to keep the heat from flushing to your cheeks.
“You’re letting me eat you out, how am I being weird?” He leans up from you, putting two hands on your knees but still waiting for your eyes to meet his again. “You want me to act like the other dudes? Dip my tongue in then wrap it up?”
You groan, rolling your eyes back to him and analyzing the way his big hands drape over your knees.
“Okay, fair.” You admit defeat, feeling his warm palms move down the back of your thighs and to your ass.
“Lift up,” He says, quickly pulling the shorts off of you when you do as he asks.
“Oh–” He gasps quietly. “Damn.”
He stares directly between your legs, bracing his hands back at your knees and spreading your legs a bit. He angles his head in different ways to really look at you, seemingly enamored with your pussy as a whole.
“Look who’s staring now.” You chuckle, instinctively hiding your face from him despite knowing he isn’t looking up at you.
“Yeah– I am,” he admits, now adjusting himself on the bed to lay down, his head easily slotting between your legs as he rests his chin on your lower belly and looks up at you. “You can pull my hair or do whatever, I’m just gonna…like, start I guess. Tell me if it’s something you don’t like.”
As normal as this isn’t, he’s speaking similar to how the two of you had taken on projects before. He typically takes the lead but offers you control more often than not. All you can do is nod at him, trying to comprehend that it’s your best friend’s head between your legs right now.
When he pulls his head back up with one last nod of confirmation, the first thing you feel is his fingers slipping up your folds, the other braced on your thigh and holding your legs open. You release a short sigh of relief at the feeling and he instantly smirks at it.
“I haven’t even started yet,” He whispers, glancing up at you before fixing his eyes back on the expanse of your pussy. He uses his ring and pointer finger to spread your lips open, and the middle finger to rub against your hole only for a brief moment before he licks his lips and releases his own sigh of relief. “God, Sunghoon would be so jealous right now.”
You look down at him, wanting to ask him what the fuck he’s talking about and why he’d bring up Sunghoon right now, but you find yourself staring at him instead. Breath caught in your throat with the way his eyes meet yours before letting his tongue hang from his mouth as if presenting it to you in a cheeky way.
He’s so fast with it too, with the way he replaces his middle finger with his tensed tongue, forcing you to swallow your words and hold your breath even more. You can feel him lick and nibble against each of your lips before moving inward, flattening his tongue to lick one long, languid, and wet stripe up until meeting your clit.
He wraps his lips around it, sucking once, hard, before releasing it and pulling back to look at you.
“This okay?”
Goddamn him for making you have to talk right now. You’re still trying to comprehend the fact that he said Sunghoon, fucking Sunghoon of all people would be jealous that he’s doing this right now. That’s definitely a question for later, because yeah, it’s fucking okay.
More than okay.
You nod to him, throwing your arm over your eyes and instinctively bucking your hips up towards his hovering mouth.
“Oh, that was hot,” He groans out his compliment, watching the way you hide your face before he pulls his eyes back down and uses his fingers to spread your pussy open wider, enough to see your hole pulsate when he dips down to blow against it, “I can see how wet you’re getting, Is it because of me or is it just because someone is playing with your pussy?”
You half groan half moan at that, mostly because hearing these words from him is something that feels entirely too sexual. As if he hasn’t already tasted you, as if you’re not spread out by his fingers right now. You ignore his words, yet, your brain holds onto them with white knuckles and your hips buck toward him again.
“Not a talker, got it.” He notes, watching your hips chase his breath.
He watches for much longer than you’d like for him to, and you’re about to lift up and accuse him of being just like the other guys but he shuts your thoughts off so fucking fast when you feel his lips on you again.
His tongue explores every part of you, licking and sucking against areas you didn’t even know would feel good until his mouth lands against your clit again. This time, you can’t help it, you grind up and he hums at it as he braces your legs open just enough to skew his head and move his tongue back down.
He’s slurping. Lost in the moment as he does it. Tasting you in full and getting a warm, pleasant feeling each time your legs try to close and your hips buck up for more. He…can’t believe this is finally happening. Fucking finally.
Unsure if you’d let him, he tries anyway. He stiffens his tongue, circling your hole before pressing just a bit, giving you just enough pressure that you feel frustrated. So frustrated that you’re the one who ends up finishing his attempt at something new. You reach down and lace your fingers in his hair, and let out a soft, needy little moan for him.
That sound forces one from his chest too, he can’t help it, really. With the way you’re grabbing his hair and holding his head in place, pressing yourself against his mouth so much harder than before. Ah, he really, really loves doing this for you.
To think any man would already be done? To think anyone could like, not wanna eat you out? Insanity. Stupid, stupid fucking men.
He can taste how wet you are now, truly taste it as he stretches your hole as much as he can with his tongue and another groan of his own. It’s probably embarrassing, truly, but he doesn’t care.
Both of you are moaning at this point as you hold his head in place and grind your hips harder than you think you are. He loves it, you love it. So much that you really are barely comprehending that your best friend could do this the whole time?! And never told you until now?!
Jake is just as drunk on the moment as you are though. Totally lost in the scent and taste of you as he continues to lap away, constantly trying to prove that you can and will get off from his mouth alone. And honestly? It’s at the point that he figures he can use his fingers now too considering you let him spread you open with his tongue. What’s a little more gonna hurt, anyway?
The taste of you alone has him in heaven, cursing any man who didn’t take advantage of your pussy against their mouth. He can easily slip a finger into a hole this wet and needy, gasping in awe before glancing up at you.
God, the way you immediately ride his finger, no huff or sound of irritation that he’s pulled his tongue back now. Your face. Fuck.
He watches as you shamelessly chase the small amount of pleasure he can offer in terms of just head and fingering. He can imagine how hot you’d be without that shirt on, with your legs around his hips, with your mouth wrapped around him. You look blissed out, soaking his finger and keeping your hand in his hair, mindlessly grabbing and scratching at him.
Making quick work, he goes back for your clit, circling his tongue around the bundle of nerves and noticing how you ride his finger harder. He can’t help but smirk against you when you do it either.
The movement of your hips constantly humping against him is enough, and he can’t help but groan at the sound of your slick squelching out of you and warming his chin, he can’t fucking help but grind his own hips forward when you act like this. His cock is so painfully hard for you right now, at the taste of you, that all he can do is chase the mattress beneath him. Tensing his muscles and moaning against your clit shamelessly at the jolts of pleasure he gets from it.
He slips another finger in with ease, feeling how much wetter you’ve gotten in the way the slide is filthy and audible. You groan out at that too, feeling his tongue flick relentlessly against your clit and only now moving your free hand from your face and trailing to your stomach.
You can’t even talk, so you don’t. You lift your shirt up until you can at least rub against your nipples, just to heighten the pleasure your best friend is so graciously giving you.
His eyes roll back when you do that, only to fall back on you and get a frustrated grunt from him. He’s a bit annoyed that the shirt is still covering you despite your hand under it, fondling yourself. He’s thinking with his cock, so fucking aroused that he doesn’t think twice when he aggressively lifts your shirt up to your chin and watches the way your fingers poke and prod at yourself.
He inhales a sharp breath at the image, and his hips fuck harder against the mattress at that. His fingers speed up and now he’s focused. You feel him all over you from the waist down, his tongue flicking and lips sucking against your swollen clit, his fingers relentlessly fucking into you, your fingers heightening those sensations by playing with your own tits– then, oh, then you notice.
Jake, you’re best fucking friend, is so goddamn horny that he’s dry humping against your bed and whining out moans against your clit. Probably to avoid asking for more, to avoid making you feel obligated to get him off too, to avoid anything you may not want or consent to. And that’s why he’s your best friend.
It doesn’t take long after that, your hips come to a stop as you watch him get himself off all while getting you off, and you find your orgasm bubbling up much faster than if you’d have imagined solely because of the image in front of you.
“Jake, you’re fucking whining.” You groan almost as needy as he does, rolling your hips up in a stutter.
He was almost gonna stop, because yeah, he is whining. Gasping for air but only tasting you, only swallowing up the moans you give to him, only inhaling the dull scent of the fruity soap you used when you showered. But, you moan louder after you say that. You like it. You like seeing him act so desperate. So he continues, shamefully reaching one of his hands between himself and the bed and quickly shoving it down his pants, circling around his cock and continuing to fuck into it.
If he thinks hard enough, you’re what he’s fucking right now, and technically, he is. With his fingers and mouth at least. When your hips stutter more, he fucks harder against his hand and holds his fingers inside of you as deep as he can get them. There, he sucks against your clit until you’re the one whining louder.
You’re shocked at how quickly you’re getting off. Releasing a splash against him in a breathy, choked up sob. Nearly squeezing his head between your thighs to the point he almost misses the way you breathe out strings of praises toward him. But he hears them.��
He definitely heard you say that he looks sexy with your hand in his hair, and god, did he ride off of the fact that you encouraged him to get off with you. Regardless of if you knew if he could or not, regardless of if you knew his hand was providing just enough pleasure for him to do just that.
There, as your orgasm subsides with his tongue still flicking your sensitive clit, you watch him writhe his hips against your mattress, his eyes slammed shut, and his breath coming out in pornographic moans. So this is what Jake looks like when he cums. It’s desperate, but somehow, it feels passionate too.
You’re all dazed after the fact, pussy pulsing and tingling from the loss of his lips and fingers once he pulls back and lays against your bed with a lazy smile. His pants are uncomfortable, but he doesn’t mind as he wipes his hand across his shirt and watches the way you catch your breath.
“So,” He tries to say, clearing his throat. “I– um– hope that’s what you needed?”
You’re shy. You’re never fucking shy, especially towards Jake, but god.
“Um, yeah,” you sigh out, lifting from the bed and looking back at him. Part of you wondering if that’s what it’s supposed to be like when someone gives you good head, or if that’s just…what it’s like when Jake gives head.
For some reason, you genuinely don’t think another man would ever eat you out to that level again. There’s no way, based on experience.
“It was definitely what I needed.”
He nods in a shy way, reminding himself that his pants are fucking nasty right now. So, he goes to stand up and extends a hand out to you.
“Let’s go clean up.”
You shake your head, not at all wanting to move from this bed. He nods again, pulling your shirt back down for you and leaning to look at you.
“I’m gonna bring you something to clean up with, and I’m gonna shower.”
You smile at him, a bit dazed as you make yourself comfortable on your messy sheets as you think hard about the fact that this dopey motherfucker really never told you how good he was at this? Rude.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
Jake looks all proud of himself when he comes back to your room and cuddles into bed with you much like he always has.
“I didn’t expect to sleep over, I have work in the morning.” He whispers in a rasp against your back, curling around you like the perfect big spoon.
You’re quick to turn on his work alarm on your phone, like you always do when he crashes during weeknights. Because, what best friend doesn’t have alarms set for each other anyway?
After a few more long moments of silence, you try to talk. Mostly because your brain is swimming with the fact that, like, you’re not sure but it’s just– wow.
“Hey, um–”
“Hmm?” He hums out in a sleep-heavy voice.
“Did you actually enjoy doing that?”
“Are you fucking kidding me? I literally came in my pants.” His sudden louder voice causes you to jump, but you relax back into his gasp.
“Oh,” You think hard. “Is this gonna change stuff between us?”
“Probably, but not in like, a bad way. More like in the can-i-eat-you-out-all-the-time-way.” He responds with mock-confidence, shifting a bit and hugging you closer to him, as if to hide the way he’s trying to make this sound like a joke. For his own comfort, really.
You smile.
“And don’t tell other dudes my secrets.” He adds.
“I won't.”
Jake has his own smile from behind you, wondering if he really is just that good at eating pussy. The truth is, he’s done it a handful of times but he was just really really interested in doing it for you. For…reasons.
・・・・・・THIS WAS ORIGINALLY TWO PARTS, NOW IT’S ONE. YOU’RE WELCOME・・・・・・
“Hey, um,”
“Hmm?” Jake hummed out in a sleep-heavy voice.
“Did you actually enjoy doing that for me?”
“Are you fucking kidding me? I literally came in my pants.” He responded in a sudden, louder voice.
“Oh,” You think hard. “Is this gonna change stuff between us?”
“Probably, but not in like, a bad way. More like in the can-i-eat-you-out-all-the-time-way.”
You remember the conversation that happened after he went down on you like it was yesterday, and he’s a goddamn liar. Nothing changed in your friendship with him, and he certainly doesn’t ask to eat you out all the time either. If anything, you’ve felt disappointed time and time again with the aftermath of that night.
It’s weighing on you in a strange way. At first, the weeks following the first and apparently, only time Jake went down on you, you almost expected him to ask for a repeat. You wanted to return the favor. You wanted him to ask but he never did. Even when he came over to hang out, even when you tried to lay down hints.
Nothing changed.
In fact, he doesn’t even talk about it. He doesn’t look at you as if he’s tasted you, and he doesn’t act like he came in his palm against your bed, right in front of you. He’s just…Jake. Sweet, caring, aloof, Jake. And you’re just you. Except you want to be someone else at this point. Someone that he does feel differently around after that.
Maybe you weren’t a memorable event for him when it comes to intimacy. Maybe he prefers to pretend it never happened? Maybe he was really just doing you a favor and intending for it to never go past the initial act. Even with his sweet words after the fact. Maybe, that was just to reassure you so it wouldn’t be awkward.
You’re a version of you who wants to know what the fuck he’s thinking about. Did it taste bad? Did he get cold feet about it all? Arguably, if things did get weird after what happened, you’d feel more comfortable than you do with the situation as it stands.
It is weird now, but only because it’s not weird for him.
Even now, as you lay across the same bed where he had his head nestled between your legs, you can almost feel the tingle of what it felt like. The way his hair tickled your thighs, and the way his fingers laid against the flesh of your legs. The sun is beaming in through your windows and it still doesn’t feel as warm as it did when he cuddled against you that night. It’s been weeks and your heart is sick for him by this point. Sick with confusion, angst, lust, maybe even love if you think hard enough.
You miss him a lot more than before as you throw your hand up to your face in a gentle slap as if to knock yourself out of it. This is insane. Every day you wake up feeling this way, thinking of him, and where you stand with him. It wasn’t like this at first, you truly expected him to come back for more and now you’re just sitting here with a loop of reasons as to why he never did.
Insane. You’ve gotten head from so many people and didn’t think twice about them the next day, Jake is different though. You knew he would be too.
Why is Jake any different? Why do you miss him so badly right now? Why couldn’t he pick up on it either? Even worse, why do you feel like doing that with him was a mistake?
He’s with his parents for the weekend, and you’re here still thinking about shit that should have been released with your orgasm.
You haven’t gone on any dates since that day, you haven’t met up with any one other than him to hang out, and at this point you’re starting to feel a little pathetic for falling in so deep. It’s entirely one sided, he makes that very clear.
So, naturally, you hop up with the confidence of a damn lion and decide that today, it ends. You will stop making it weird between the two of you, if he has even noticed anyway. You’re gonna get dressed, look hot as fuck, and sit on your couch swiping left and right until you find a hot piece of man that’s willing to take you out tonight.
That’s when something dawns on you. You remember Jake briefly mentioning Sunghoon to you, which seemed more like an implication if anything at the time.
Why would Sunghoon be jealous of what happened? You can admit to being attracted to him but it’s not like the two of you hang out often or anything, and it’s also kind of a rule for yourself that you don’t fuck within the friendgroup. Jake was an exception, solely because that’s your best friend. Or, well, was your best friend.
Now though? Who cares about these little rules you create for yourself? You need a confidence boost. You need your mind to be taken off of this little spiral you keep falling into. Most of all, you need to be proven wrong that you can still get off without it being him.
So, texting Sunghoon? Easy.
Thankfully, Sunghoon texting you back at lightning speed seemed even easier for him.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
Well, Sunghoon sure did a great job at getting your mind off of Jake for the past couple of hours.
You lay here in his bed, feeling your body tingle from the sensation of just how well he lived up to the promise of a good time. For hours he touched you, licked against you, fucked you. And yeah, you did fucking enjoy it.
But why now? Why did you only just decide to give Sunghoon a shot? Why are you lying in his bed, with his heavy arms thrown across you as he snores gently behind you, feeling the need to cry? Why do you wish it was Jake, your best friend who seemed so eager to please and then suddenly leaped ten feet back as if he never suggested it in the first place?
Your brain is confused despite your body relaxing itself from the state of bliss you were able to experience. You really did enjoy this time with Sunghoon and think that maybe, if you continue to make late night visits to him, the need for your best friend will weaken in time.
God, if only Jake would just talk about it.
And you fall asleep thinking about that. About how you’ve let your feelings weaken you to the point that it’s genuinely hard to enjoy being pleasured by someone who actually has the capability.
And, well, you wake up much the same, except Sunghoon was quite quick with his fingers upon waking up himself. Showing you that even if the person you want doesn’t have a thing to do with you, he sure does.
“Good morning,” He rasps in a sleepy voice, fingers already traveling down your stomach as he hugs up against you from behind. “Glad you finally came through for me.”
You quirk a brow. Right, Jake is the whole reason you're here. If not for mentioning him, at least.
“I finally came through?” You chuckle, your body jolting at the ticklish sensation of his lips brushing the back of your neck. “You knew I was single, why didn’t you call me?”
You feel a harsher kiss against your neck, and his fingers only travel further down now.
“Bro code.” He whispers, dipping his fingers between your still naked thighs. “I’m not overstepping if you’re the one asking for it.” He slides his fingers gently back and forth between your legs, trying to work you up. “And you did.”
You think hard about that. Bro code, overstepping limits, not coming onto someone unless they do first solely because someone must have asked him not to. And you’d think even harder about who that someone might be, but instead your brain is quickly thrown into the morning sex routine Sunghoon must offer to all of his lovers.
You enjoy it too, the small moments of bliss where you’re not in your head about what you could have possibly done wrong with Jake for you to end up feeling this way. It’s a brief moment of numbness though, feeling his fingers pleasure you gently can only do so much to quiet your thoughts.
“Are you saying one of your friends had dibs on me or something?” You laugh in a half-joke, arching your back to rub your ass up and against the bigger and warmer man behind you.
“You could say that, I’m assuming he missed his chance though–” Sunghoon whispers snidely, now satisfied with how you already drip for him and sliding one of his fingers into you. His other hand, being used to hike one of your legs up and against his hip to open you up for him. “You wouldn’t be here doing this if he didn’t.”
You clench around his finger unintentionally, pretending you don’t know who you’re both referring to. Mostly because there’s no way in hell it’s your best friend, seeing as how he’s acting like you don’t exist outside of platonic friendship with him. Then again, who else could it be? Jay? Heeseung? Fucking Jungwon? As fucking if.
“I guess he did miss his chance–” You breathe, now allowing yourself to give into the lazy and slow pleasure being offered. “Deeper.”
And he listens. Sunghoon goes deeper and deeper with one finger, then two, then three, up until you slip his fingers out of you and plead through your body to have more. Deeper still, holding you from behind, plunging in as if to intentionally fuck the confusion out of you. As if to, maybe, prove that Jake isn’t the only man who can please you now.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
When you eventually find yourself walking through your front door, you do feel better. Sunghoon did have some type of capability to make you feel as desired as Jake did. After all, it’s not often that you sleep over with a man, better yet get fucked again as soon as you wake up with him.
Even so, you know Jake will be back tomorrow, wanting to hang out yet again as if nothing happened. Thankfully, with Sunghoon around, maybe you can pretend alongside him. Maybe even forget it ever happened.
You can argue that for the first time, you’re even a bit annoyed when you see his name pop up in your notifications with a call as if you’re not right in the middle of texting Sunghoon. It’s not that you were trying to go back over to his house or anything, but man, he sure is trying to get you to come back for a third round already.
Maybe you just like when people are eager to please you, or maybe you don’t like to feel as if you’re the one chasing another person. Still, you answer Jake, seemingly releasing all of this resentment you’ve built up for him in an instant.
“What?” You huff into the phone, feeling it vibrate with another text from Sunghoon and wanting nothing more than to see what his fourth reason would be for you to come over not even two hours after you left.
“What?” Jake responds in confusion to you. “What do you mean ‘what’?”
“I mean what do you want? I’m busy.” You huff again with a roll of your eyes, flopping back on your bed.
“Oh god, something happened.” Jake groans, though he was simply calling you because he missed your voice. “What’s wrong?”
“No, not really. Was just trying to figure out what I’m doing tonight when you rudely interrupted me.”
Something is off, Jake can feel it. Your voice has a bite to it, one that feels like you’re mad at him. Not to mention, he knows what you mean when you say you’re trying to find something to do for the night. He tries to reserve his feelings though, despite wanting that something to be him.
“Oh, I know there’s an event at one of the clubs downtown tonight I think. Jay mentioned it–” He pauses briefly to hear another annoyed breath from you. “You’re not gonna go with him?”
“Nah,” You wave off dismissively. “I think I’m just gonna go hang out with Sunghoon.”
You don’t notice at all the brief and panicked silence for a solid second and a half before Jake reacts.
“Wait, what?” He says quickly after managing to process those words, trying not to sound as panicked as he knows he feels. “Sunghoon? Why?!”
God, he knew he shouldn’t have said anything about Sunghoon that day, but his confidence was overflowing and he couldn’t help but boast at the time. It’s come back to shoot him in the dick, knowing full well that Sunghoon has been trying to get you into bed since he fucking met you. Hearing you ask for him in this context is something that makes his blood run cold.
“Relax, I was with him last night. It’s kind of like, maybe gonna be a normal thing now.”
You refuse to pick up on Jake’s tone. He had all the time in the world to make you feel something other than confusion, and this is just fucking petty at this point. He clearly doesn’t want to have anything with you, so why in the hell should you just sit around hoping? Waiting?
“Sunghoon? You want to fuck Sunghoon?” He asks in a lower tone, trying to convince himself that he has to be mishearing you. You can hear him shuffle around and close a door behind him, showing that he doesn’t want his parents to hear him. But the frustration showing blatantly in his voice is somehow…satisfying.
“I already did. I figured he would show me a good time since no one else can, and he did.” You shrug with slight disobedience. Resentment bubbling up in your gut to the extent that you almost want to grill him for having any type of opinion about it.
Jake hangs on those words for a second. “Since no one else can.”
He really thought he was the one who could do it for you.
“Yeah, but–” Jake starts, feeling like a child almost in the way he protests despite not being in a position to have a say in who you sleep with. “You know what? Nevermind. Do what you want.” He adds blankly, hanging up before you can get another word in.
Honestly, he doesn’t know what he’s doing wrong because you acted like he was fully capable of doing everything right. Hanging out with him consistently after the fact, not making it weird, flirting with him, asking him to sleep over.
He wasn’t sure if he should ask you for more or if he should ask you to be his girlfriend first. The whole reason he’s with his parents right now is because he felt the need to run home to his Mom for girl advice. Embarrassing? Yes, but he really wanted to do things right. He cares about you.
He needed just one single weekend away, and the second he’s gone you’re out fucking other dudes? Fucking Sunghoon?
By now, that asshole is probably feeling like he’s on top of the world for getting to touch you. Not even he has done what Sunghoon managed to do with you by now and he can’t help but feel pissed about it.
Whether you’re his or not, Sunghoon never should have been a fucking option.
So, he calls you right back, pushing back the feeling of how pathetic it seems considering he’s the one who hung up on you. Then, when you don’t pick up, he immediately feels his stomach drop.
You must be talking to Sunghoon, you must be setting up a time and place to meet with him. And Jake has heard that Sunghoon knows how to fuck. Other people have said he’s good in bed. Surely, if you’ve already been with him once and you’re still wanting to go back to him, those other people weren’t lying.
To Jake, it feels like he’s losing you to his own friend with each passing second, and it’s weighing so heavy that spamming your phone with calls to interrupt whatever it is you’re doing right now feels like the right thing to do. In fact, it feels like it is the best thing in the world to do.
He calls again. You don’t answer.
Again.
“What?!” You answer, annoyed.
“Why would you even want Sunghoon?! Is he really that much better than I am?” He doesn’t think before he says it, because if he did, he wouldn’t have been able to say it at all.
It’s his turn to experience that awkward silence because in all fairness, you don’t know how to respond to that. You feel annoyed now, you feel confused and quite frankly, blind sided. Since when did he care?
“What’s that supposed to mean? You came onto me once and then never followed up.” You dead-pan at yourself in the mirror across your bedroom, speaking into the phone with a voice that seems scolding. “I don’t see why you’re mad that I’m hanging out with Sunghoon. We aren’t dating, Jake.”
“Since when? Who said I didn’t want to do it again?” Jake argues back in a whispered voice, showing you that he still can’t be as loud as he’d like to be. He chooses to ignore that last sentence though, pretending as if it doesn’t strike him in the center of the heart.
“Nobody! That’s the thing, you haven’t said anything about it. Not that you want to, not that you don’t. You’re just being you and it’s driving me up a fucking wall.”
Pause.
“You’re mad because I didn’t make it weird?” It’s like his brain clicks.
“Pretending it didn’t happen somehow makes it worse.” You lower your voice, ignoring the string of texts Sunghoon is sending you and listening closely to what Jake might say next. Your heart is racing through this hushed argument, and it feels good to admit that you kept thinking about it, even if he hasn’t.
“I wasn’t pretending that it didn’t happen,” He pinches the bridge of his nose with a sigh. “I just wasn't sure what the next step was.”
You’re fucking appalled.
“Jake, I have been flirting with you since it happened because I couldn’t stop thinking about it. You’re the one who didn’t make any moves, so I figured you wanted it to end there.” You sigh loudly, but somehow feel a bit lighter. “Do you have any idea how that fucked with my confidence?”
Jake sighs along with you on the other end of the line.
“That’s why I was annoyed earlier, and that’s why I’m going to Sunghoon’s tonight.”
“What?” Jake’s voice raises a bit higher. “Still?!”
It’s the fact that he’s trying to explain himself. Had he known that you were confused by his lack of, um, touching you, he would have done it every day since it happened! Yet, you’re still considering Sunghoon an option? Knife to the heart, honestly.
Or maybe he’s not being clear enough with you about this.
You, on the other hand, nod your head as you hum a confirmation to him, smiling and wondering if this conversation will turn into an event that would, perhaps, have you cancel the hook-up with Sunghoon.
“Why? Are you jealous?” You pry.
“You really called him, and now I’m just sitting here in my old room trying to find a way to get to you before he does….again.” An inhale. “ Yes! I’m fucking jealous!”
You remain silent, trying to pretend that your pettiness isn’t solely to confirm what he seems to be implying to you. Then, an unintentional chuckle leaves your lips.
“Why are you laughing?!” His voice is raised again, and he doesn’t seem to stop spilling what he needs to say. “I wanted to do that for you for years and you somehow still didn’t know?” He pauses. “I always made it weird between us, what? You thought I treated all of my friends like that?”
You just listen, feeling your heart beat in time with each word he speaks. Strings of sentences like, “I’m going to kick his ass.” and “You thought I’d just eat you out as a friend?! You’re insane.” and “I would have come home last night if you wanted to feel good so badly, why did you have to go see him, of all people?”
The confirmation of Jake being the friend who forbade Sunghoon from making a move on you is right there, clear as day.
“Ah, so the Jake I know isn’t the Jake everyone else knows?” You respond, trying to force the tingling feeling in your gut to calm itself. Hearing him be so blatant to you has your heart doing flips, and it’s not an easy task to make it stop.
“Of-fucking-course not!” He rolls his eyes, you can definitely tell. “You had me wrapped around your pinky from day one.”
“And you really thought that, with the way you seemed so uninterested–” You pause, processing his words. “I would have asked you to come home from your parent’s house to get me off? For what? Funsies? You thought I'd be brave enough or selfish enough to ask such a thing?”
Jake sighs deeply, seemingly fed up with the situation.
“It wouldn’t be because you are selfish.” He breathes out, almost angrily. “And for the last time, I’m not uninterested. I was just trying to do things right. I don’t just want to fuck you, you know.”
“And you didn’t think to tell me until weeks after you ate me out?” You smile harder, trying to contain the heat flushing over your cheeks. “Until after I thought I had a pH imbalance and maybe you were just grossed out by me?!”
“I’m genuinely shocked you didn’t know already. Made me think you weren’t interested enough to like–” He pauses, not wanting to be too telling. “I guess waiting and being polite isn’t really your style. I should have known that though.”
You let him continue, because you can tell he’s simply taking breaths and small pauses to figure out how to express his thoughts to you.
“You can’t tell me that over the years, you never once noticed how often I stared at you.” He lowers his voice again, softening it to an extent that you actually feel the butterflies fly from your belly to your chest.
”The fact that I jumped in head first and offered to do that for you? I didn’t think I had to tell you at this point…”He breathes out a chuckle through the line this time. “And for the record, I couldn’t get enough of it. I was just trying to like– I don’t know.”
You listen to him breathe deeply, again.
“I didn’t want you to think I was in it just for the sex, I guess.”
There. There it is. You’re nearly kicking your feet, feeling him confirm feelings and erase any hint of doubt within you. Despite never truly noticing that he treats you differently compared to his other friends, despite never thinking too hard about the way he looks at you.
“You acted like it wasn’t a big deal, Jake. I’m not joking. If that’s how you act when you like someone, you shouldn’t blame me for not noticing.”
“I literally tongue fucked you.” He dead-pans. “Friends don’t just do that.”
“I thought we were friends who could do that.” You argue. “But I guess you’re not quite looking to just remain friends, are you?”
“No,” Jake sighs. “Mom told me I needed to take you out on some extravagant date and express my undying love for you with a handful of red roses, but I guess this is just how it’s gonna be. After all, this is you.”
“And this is you.” You confirm.
“I was going to come home tomorrow and try to lie our way to the restaurant, which I still can, if you want. You kind of fucked up my plan though.”
You pause at his words, suddenly feeling like shit for not realizing sooner. In your defense though, if he really did like you from day one, you didn’t exactly have a chance to see how he would have acted without feelings. The Jake you know is your best friend, and someone you trusted with everything, you thought he treated everyone as well as he treated you. That’s why, when he didn’t change, you couldn’t read him anymore.
Then again, all of this could have been fucking avoided if he had just voiced it to you.
“Romance is dead and it’s your fault.” Jake tries to joke, his soft tone somehow coming out even softer as he waits for some type of response from you.
“So, are we done fighting?” You ask meekly, tapping your finger against your phone and looking up at the ceiling with a smile that by now, you can’t escape. “Since you’ve just expressed your undying love for me and I very much wouldn’t mind going on a date with you so we can work this out face to face?”
“Are you still going to fuck Sunghoon?”
You laugh.
“Oh yeah, for sure–” To his silence, you immediately take it back. “Oh my god, relax. It’s a joke.”
“Get better jokes, asshole.”
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
“What the fuck?” Jake deadpans into the phone, his heart beating far too fast for his health, but vibing with it anyway because by tomorrow night, he’ll be next to you again. “You seriously had sex with her?!”
“Hey, she’s the one who called me.” Sunghoon shrugs as he listens. “To be fair, Jake, I did tell her that someone else had dibs on her.”
Jake slaps his forehead and rolls his eyes.
“You’re such a dick– I told you at least three hundred times that I like her! I don’t have dibs.” He gripes, trying to pretend that he’s not imagining Sunghoon with you, the person he wants the most.
“Damn right you don’t, because she seemed to have a great t–”
“Sunghoon, stop. I don’t want to know what happened, but like, stop texting her.”
Sunghoon’s brow raises in curiosity.
“Ah, did you finally make a move?”
If there’s anything Jake knows Sunghoon won’t do, it’s go for a woman that is actually unavailable. He has his fun, and he’s not one to turn anyone down if he has an interest in them, bro code be damned. And yeah, he’s still a little pissed at him for hooking up with you…but, it is true, Jake made you feel like he wasn’t even an option in his attempts to be a gentleman.
Still, boundaries need to be set now. Real boundaries.
“I did, and I would really appreciate it if you back off. I’m trying to make something out of this, you know?”
Sunghoon lightens up, sighing at his loss of a would be fuck-buddy that seemed more promising than some he’s had in the past.
“Jesus, you’re serious about her aren’t you?” He smirks as he speaks, feeling proud of Jake for finally stepping up for himself. “I mean, I can totally see why. Please excuse me as I mourn that sweet, sweet, pu-”
“Sunghoon.” Jake warns. “Shut the fuck up.”
“Relax, jesus.” Sunghoon plays it cool, though he actually is mourning it a little bit. “Good on you though. I’ll back off, don’t worry.”
Jake rolls his eyes yet again, his love-hate relationship with Sunghoon becoming more fond than ever by this point. Only because the confidence he had in himself before all of this wasn’t entirely where it needed to be. It’s true that he wasn’t exactly a pussy eating god before, nor could he even say he’s amazing at sex but, when it comes to you, he can’t help but be excited. He wants to do it all, be it all for you.
Never in his life has he eaten pussy like that, and never in your life have you felt a mouth so eager to please between your legs.
Sunghoon could have been something, but he couldn’t have been Jake, ever.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
The day couldn’t go by any slower than it already has.
Jake comes home tonight, and by home, you mean to your apartment where he doesn’t live.
Your mind goes in loops on what could possibly happen. Scenarios of him getting cold feet and ignoring that any of this happened at all again. Scenes of him unlocking your door, closing in on you, and kissing you before you can even say “hello”. Images of his hands on you, his mouth on you, what it would feel like if he were to…well, oh.
You snap yourself out of it, every bad scenario in your head gets replaced with one where you’ve got Jake working himself on and inside of you. It’s making you feel hot, insane, and entirely too horny for the proposed date night full of talking that needs to be had first.
Then you freeze, your hand on the handle of your mug as you wonder a bit too hard.
What if he doesn’t show up at all?
You did run off the second he left the city and fuck one of your mutual friends. Arguably, you were equally as bad at communicating with him as he was to you during the past few weeks. Sure, you flirted, but was that even enough when he literally put his tongue inside of you “as a friend”?
God, he’d have every right to not show up. To move on, to never speak to you again.
You’ve been so stupid. Both of you have, stumbling together but apart into something neither of you could even begin to navigate. For you? Sex is easy. Feelings though? That’s where it gets complicated. Yet, still, you find yourself more willing than ever to let these feelings roam free if he accepts them at face value.
Solely because of how shitty it felt when you were trying to pretend that Jake was nothing but a one time thing for his sake.
And when the time comes, after hours of brooding, getting worked up, and feeling insane, you’re looking like a mess when he knocks on your door. So much for looking good for him. You’re an absolute fucking wreck when you open that door and dead-pan stare at him and his bags.
“Hi,” He smiles, not quite making eye contact because he really is kind of embarrassed by all of this. “I’m here.”
You step back from the door, eyes remaining on him.
“You’re here.” You say quietly, watching him step into your apartment and drop his bags.
You feel his breath before you hear his voice. So much closer than just moments before, right up against your ear, and his arms wrapping tightly around you.
“Felt like I was gone for too long–” He whines slightly against you, breathing in a breath and taking in your scent. “Didn’t know I could miss you like that.”
You fucking melt. Out of all of those scenarios and fantasies in your head, this wasn’t one of them. Which goes to show that Jake is the one person in this world who can surprise you time and time again. You’ve hugged him like this hundreds of times, but this one, oh this one. He feels so close after feeling so fucking far away.
“You were gone for two days,” You smile, nuzzling against him and gripping his waist in your own hug.
“Two days too long, though.” You feel him smile, that little upturn of his lips pushing his cheek up and against you as he chuckles and pulls back. “We don’t have a lot of time, but we can still make it to the restaurant if you still want to go? I can shower when we get back.”
You pull back, offering him a small nod and feeling a bit let down. You wanted more, especially after that hug. The fact that he can contain himself right now feels isolating. Are you the only one who has a vibrating brain right now? He really wants to have the conversation at the restaurant?
He really wants to do this the right way?
You look like shit, but arguably he might think he looks worse considering the long trip back to you. Still, the restaurant is the chosen option to have this conversation, and you’re ready to get it over with so that finally the two of you can take a step forward.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
The restaurant is nice. There’s a buzz of conversations surrounding the two of you but most of it feels muffled because the only sound you can truly hear is Jake’s hushed and awkward attempts to get the ball rolling.
“So, I guess that’s why I went to my parent’s house. It’s embarrassing, I know–” He says before you cut him off.
“Tell me how you felt the past few weeks when we were together.” You say boldly, wanting so badly to have the confirmation that he really does want this, and that he suffered much like you did.
You watch a fan of rosy tint cross his cheeks as he breaks eye contact with you, looking to the table and then back up at you.
“Okay, um–” He stiffens a bit, glancing around to make sure no one is looking or listening in. “When we weren’t together, it was a lot easier for me to think, but when we were together, I could only really think about one thing.” He admits, nodding to himself.
You look at him curiously before you see his eyes light up in panic.
“No! No, no. Not like, sex…” He looks down. “I mean, yeah maybe sex too but mostly I just couldn’t stop thinking about ways to make you want me more than anyone else.”
Your heart swells at his panicked save, and then the words that follow.
“I think I already did want you more than anyone else.” You admit back to him. “Even if I didn’t know I had feelings until you did that to me– I’m sorry it took me so long to realize.”
He smiles, reaching over the table as if to ask for your hand.
“What about you? What did you think about when we were together after that night?” He asks for his own confirmation now.
“Sex. Mostly, I guess. I felt like no one else would ever be able to make me feel that good again.” You look away, feeling ashamed and seen. “Goddamn, I sound so dramatic.”
Jake snorts, laughing at how he should have expected this but the confidence boost is a happy surprise to him.
“To be fair though, Jake, I think I had my feelings and my lust for you mixed up.” You continue. “But that doesn’t change the fact that I still feel both of those things every time I see you, or even think of you.”
“Feelings and lust?” He nods with a smile and wiggling his eyebrows, his eyes glistening in the warm lighting of the restaurant.
You nod in confirmation, side eyeing the waitress who walks over to take down your order.
Both of you are somehow dissociated outside of each other, there’s no way you’re not because you don’t recall what you ordered, nor what he ordered, and he appears to be feeling much the same. The moment she walks away, he’s continuing.
“I was really that good, huh?” A smirk from him, and a nod from you.
“What about right now then? How do you feel when you look at me?” He follows up, looking down at the table.
“Both of those things.” You dead-pan, squeezing your legs together as you look at him and feel the warmth radiating from even this far away. The confirmation of feelings is enough by itself to have your thoughts in the gutter about him, especially after weeks of wanting him.
Especially after having to be in this stupid fucking restaurant in the first place.
He quirks a brow before lowering his voice, his eyes drooping a bit.
“Do you have any fucking idea how badly I’ve wanted to get my mouth on you?”
God, there he is. That same bold best friend who originally suggested eating you out in the first place. Not entirely unfounded that he said it, but fuck, your cheeks are searing.
“Jake, we’re in public.” You warn, knowing damn well that you’ve not been able to think of anything else either, but for the sake of the foundation of this relationship, you want to tame yourself a little bit.
“Since we started hanging out, every fucking time.” He continues, ignoring your warning. “I would get so mad when you’d go to your little hook-ups. Sometimes I even wondered if you did it intentionally to piss me off.”
Your cheeks are still hot, but now there’s a bit of guilt filling you.
“You really had no idea how badly I wanted that to be me?” He continues with his streak of confidence, unintentionally dirty talking to you solely because he, genuinely, cannot deny his attraction or his feelings for you by this point. “Even right now, I want nothing more than to have you to myself.”
You pause, the guilt leaving you in an instant as it’s fully replaced with Jake’s eagerness to have you in full, finally.
“Why–” You sigh, dropping your head into your hands to hide your face from him. “Why are we at this restaurant again?”
You feel his hand reach back over to you, removing your hands from your face and dipping down to look at you.
“It’s so fucking hard to contain myself right now. I can admit that.” He whispers, blinking at you. “If you feel satisfied with where we stand, I’d be more than happy to leave this table now and prove everything to you.”
An instant nod from you, and an instant confirmation from Jake.
You’re both out of the restaurant before a single sip of water, before a single visual inspection of the forgotten food the two of you ordered, and before any doubt could creep in to ruin the electrifying atmosphere you were indulging in with him.
For Jake, his self control wavers with each passing moment as you sit next to him in the car. You look so calm as he drives as quickly and safely as possible back to your apartment, shaming himself for ever considering the two of you go in the first place. Still, the outcome is somehow more satisfying. Both of you wanting to leave just so you can truly be alone together? He couldn’t ask for a better night.
Still, your calmness contrasts the way his insides vibrate the closer he gets to your place, and he wonders how the fuck you manage to do it. If you were to simply glance at him at the right moment, you’d see his entire body melt in the fantasies of what the two of you may be willing to do tonight.
Years worth of pining in his head and heart are bubbling up now. You’re inviting him in, you’re accepting him, you’re wanting him back.
What he doesn’t know though, is that you are quite literally imagining yourself wrapped in chains to this seat. Why? Because if it weren’t for those astral chains, you’d be on top of him in an instant, reassuring him that if there’s anything in the world you’ve wanted within the past few weeks, it’s him. You’d be apologizing for never taking note of his feelings before, and kissing away all of the moments he wished he could have had with you before, replacing them with very real, firm, hot kisses.
Thankfully though, you manage to tame the beast from within and somehow, so does he. Up until you get through your apartment door and the electrifying atmosphere sizzles away in an instant.
You expected to have the confidence to, quite literally, jump on him as soon as your door closed. Instead, you find yourself standing in awe at the entryway.
Jake, on the other hand, would love nothing more than to have you right this moment, speeding and parking crooked be damned, he will not allow it just yet.
“Listen,” He reaches out to you, pulling you up and against his chest. “I need to shower before I let myself do anything.”
You breathe a sigh of relief, noting that the awkwardness came from the fact that Jake’s energy is seeping out of him, lust and worry for possibly not being as clean as he’d like to be for this.
It feels strange, actually. You can imagine you’ve had many hook-ups with men who wouldn’t even consider a shower before inviting you over.
“Hurry up then, before I decide to call Sungh-”
“Don’t you fucking dare make that joke right now,” Jake squeezes you tighter against you, hating himself for constantly bringing up reasons to wait.
“If we are going to like,” He pauses, struggling to say it out of pure nervousness that you might change your mind. “You know, be exclusive, Sunghoon’s name is forbidden.”
You chuckle against him before shoving him back in a playful way.
“Deal. Now, can you fucking hurry?” You roll your eyes playfully, internally a little thankful for the short moments you will have to prepare yourself for this.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
Damn this shower for feeling so good. Jake could fall asleep under the warmth if it weren’t for the fact that he’s been half-hard this entire time and truly fighting with himself on how to approach this situation.
It’s kind of awkward, actually. Knowing exactly what the two of you are about to do but having to wait even for fifteen minutes makes it seem like you both have a scheduled hook up and nothing more.
It’s not a hook up though. Jake is finally where he’s always wanted to be with you, in your shower priming his body to go absolutely fucking insane on you. Before, when he ate you out, he really was controlling himself. He wanted to do more with you so bad, and now? God…
He’s flushed as he finally makes his way out of the shower, length still stiffening and softening with each thought that passes. He can barely look at himself in the mirror without wanting to laugh at how embarrassing he truly is.
You’d probably laugh too, and he’d love the sound of it.
Then, he’s faced with a dilemma.
You, on the other hand, find yourself lying quietly in your bedroom after doing your best to fix the mess of yourself for whatever Jake may offer. Waiting for him, and ultimately wondering what the fuck is taking him so long when you finally hear the bathroom door open.
Faintly, you can smell your shampoo and body wash that he used as you hear him make his way to the living room and not find you.
Then, you hear him making his way to your room. He doesn’t open the door any further than it already was and instead, stands behind it quietly before muttering out.
“Um,” He starts, putting his hand on your door and only peeking his head in. “I wasn’t sure if there was a point to putting my clothes on–”
Fucking pause.
God, he must sound so stupid saying that, especially after looking into your room and seeing you lying against your bed changed into the exact same pajamas you put on the night he initially made a move on you through the guise of friendship.
Well, now it’s not even a question and he was right to assume that all he needed to do was wrap a towel around his waist and come to you.
You watch his eyes travel your body curiously, a smile forming on his face.
“If you’re wondering if I put panties on this time too,” You smile, reaching a hand out as if to invite him to open that door and come have at it. “I didn’t.”
That’s all it takes, really, to have him pushing the door open and not-so-calmly making his way to your bed.
Seeing his naked and damp chest is one thing, but smelling your scent all over him is another, especially when the first thing he does is practically envelop you with his body and plant his lips straight on your own.
The first real kiss. Despite his lips having been on you before, you melt into it and find yourself forgetting how differently he’s acting now compared to before. He was so confident, so cocky, and now he’s almost docile. Meek.
“I’ve wanted to do this for so long,” He leans back to whisper, adjusting his body so that he’s more comfortable and leaning down on one arm while the other holds your cheek. “Can’t believe you let me eat you out before ever letting me actually kiss you.”
Your face heats up at the comment, making you feel more scandalous than you ever truly tried to be. But he’s not wrong, and you regret making him feel like eating you out was the only way to get to your heart.
Strangely though, it was the way to your heart. Him doing that for you practically threw you into the deep end in search for more, from him, specifically.
“Can’t believe you decided that you should just eat me out rather than admit your feelings for me.” You counter with a smile, lifting your head to kiss against him again and pretending you can’t feel the weight of his length under the loosely knotted towel on his waist.
“Well, it worked, didn’t it?” He says through the kisses, quickly losing the ability to speak when you lick against his bottom lip and, ultimately, take control of the act.
He wonders what your mouth could do to him. His entire body reacts to the way your tongue flicks and licks against his own, it takes everything in him to try and control himself from pushing too far too soon– until he realizes that there is no reason to control himself now.
Never has making out gotten him this turned on, and it’s not a surprise because it’s you.
He half moans, half chuckles into your kiss when he does it, pressing his hips down and against your thigh much like he did previously to the very mattress he’s got you lying against.
“There’s so much I want to do,” He finally admits, pulling back from the kiss and hanging his head to feel how his cock reacts to the flesh of your thigh. “Please, let me do all of it.”
You sigh, somehow feeling a pang of arousal radiate between your legs despite not yet being touched there. The weight of him on you is enough, and all you can do is nod and await the ways he intends to relieve himself with you.
Hours of head, he could give. Even more hours of burying his cock between those pretty lips and watching you return the favor for him. His confidence grows as your body moves under him, waiting, waiting, waiting for what he will do next.
First, he plants another kiss to you, pressing his hips hard against your thigh with a breathy sigh before moving his lips down, against your neck.
At the same time, his hands work their way up your loose shirt, cupping one breast in his palm and easily teasing your nipple with his fingers. He works his lips down the center of your clothed chest, down to your stomach, and then up again. His nose nudges your shirt up with each kiss, until his lips replace his fingers and he’s sucking your nipple into his mouth.
You’ve never felt so wanted in your life with the way he appears to be savoring you. Leaving his own pleasure neglected once again, his entire focus is on you. You arch your back up a bit, hands shooting to his head and cradling it there against your breast.
He groans when you scratch against the nape of his neck, wiggling your hips under him and chasing the sensation that his mouth manages to send to your clit. He groans again when your nipple remains firm between his lips, and he begins to nibble.
And this time, he moans when he manages to trail one of his hands down just to see how much it will take of this to get you wet. He tucks one hand under your shorts, only to find that you’re already dripping, soaking his fingers with a mere single slide up your folds.
“Fuck,” He sighs as if it’s a compliment when he pops his mouth off of you, flicking his head up to look at your already dazed eyes. “Already?”
You glance away, embarrassed by how badly you want the man who was once your best friend, and is now….more than that. You can feel his fingers graze and gently play around with the heat your body has already released for him, rolling your eyes back each time he pretends he’s going to offer pressure to your clit.
He’s fucking teasing you, and you know it.
He knows it too, because of fucking course he is. After years of torture, wondering if you’d ever manage to get wet at all with the thought of him, here you are, dripping under him when all he’s done is kiss you and fondle your nipples.
Briefly, he remembers how needy your hips were when his tongue was seeping into you. He remembers the taste of each thrust you pressed against his face, and the smell of how badly you needed him at the time.
As used as he was by you that night, he wants nothing more now than to pull those same desperate moans from you, to taste the wet inside of you that no man ever managed to release for you.
“I feel like I’m going insane,” He finally breathes out, still toying with your folds and keeping an eye on the way your eyes glare back at him. “I want you so fucking bad–” He stutters now, instantly sliding his fingers into you and scooting down on the bed at lightening speed, pressing your loose shorts to the side just to get the taste of you against his lips again.
Your legs instantly shoot over his shoulders, and one of his hands reaches up to hug your thigh against him as his tongue immediately laps at every dip and crease of your cunt. His eyes nearly roll back at being able to experience this again, his fingers holding firm without a single movement just so he can feel your body confirm that you want him just as much.
The clench around his fingers are enough, and he licks around them only for a moment before returning his lips to your clit and giving you all he’s got.
All he can feel is your legs tightening around his head, nearly lifting your ass up and off of the bed, all he can hear is his own moans vibrating through him each time he hears you react.
Arguably, even after that brief moment of teasing from him, feeling his mouth so eager, much like before, sent you straight into a blissed state and made you forget about the restaurant, the shower, the weeks of pining before this. His mouth is so warm, and his vibrating moans sooth your clit through its desperate attempts to beg for more.
You can’t help the fact that your legs hug his head, or the way your hands shoot down much like before, scratching through his hair before dropping down and spreading yourself open with two fingers solely to expose your clit in full to the assault of his tongue he’s giving you.
He missed you so much, he missed this so much. Never again will he leave you wondering, from this point forward, you should be well aware that if you so much as pushed him to his knees and lifted a leg over his shoulder, he’d be eating like a fucking king.
Still, even with his immense love for kissing your pussy until your legs shake, there’s more to be experienced here than just this. His pace slows with the reality of that, and only now does he move his fingers with intent, and he pulls back to see how you’re spreading yourself for him, even as your legs fall from his shoulders.
“Fuck.” He rasps, lips glistening with a mixture of his own saliva and your slick.
You lend him a drunken smile, nodding slowly as you focus in on the way his fingers scissor you open. Within a blink though, his face is right there hovering above you, staring intently at the way you react to his fingers.
“You look so good right now, you know that?” He compliments, leaning down again to plant a kiss against you, only pumping his fingers in faster when your kiss appears to be more hungry than his own. “God, I can feel you squeeze my fingers–”
And it’s true, he’s seeing stars solely because he can feel the clench of your pussy walls pushing his two fingers together, almost pushing against his attempts to scissor you open and curl them into the spot inside he knows you have. He can only imagine how good that would feel if he were to…
His eyes squeeze shut in a drawn out moan at the thought, his own kiss growing more hungry as he releases the towel from his waist and quickens the pace of his fingers inside of you.
You can feel him press his cock against you, and the weight of it only becomes heavier when his fingers pause inside of you just so he can slip them out and use those same slick-coated digits to hold his length down and against you before he slides it between your lips. Now coating himself in the same wet sensation.
You listen closely to his moan, knowing that he seems fond of neglecting his own pleasure to the point of doing near-embarrassing things to get it back when he needs it the most. It’s strangled, almost. You can hear him swallow around it when he slides up harshly, bumping your clit and causing your shorts to stretch against the crease of your thigh.
He seems so…desperate. Yet, he can have anything he wants.
“Keep it spread open–” He mutters when he feels you try to remove the hand that had been holding your pussy out on display for him. “I want to feel all of it.”
God, you’ve never heard him say something so sexy. Easily you do as he says, now using both hands to hold either side of your pussy open for him, and feeling the underside of his length slide against your hole.
You let out a pleased sigh, despite your shorts becoming a nuisance at this point. It’s easy to forget you’re still wearing them though, because they only become drenched more and more as the moments pass with Jake.
You can genuinely just assume that his cock must be aching as he does this, leaking all over you. That’s something you don’t mind at all, because the stimulation is far beyond what you could ever ask for.
“Jake–” You try to speak, only to be cut off by his hand sliding under your head and his lips attaching yet again to you.
There, you can’t help it when you remove your hands and shoot them up to his face. Holding him there, feeling the way his jaw moves when he licks into your mouth in a desperate attempt to get as much of you as he can in this moment.
His hips fuck forward much like they did into his palm all those weeks ago, and the anticipation of if or when he finally plunges it into you drives you to kiss him just as hard as he does you.
There is nothing but the sound of kissing in the room save for muffled moans from both of you, entirely tangled up together as he does nothing more than grind himself against you. His hand cradling your head and the other still pressing his length down and against you as close as he can manage. Yours, cupping his cheeks as he kisses you, up until you run one hand down to take over for him.
In that moment, with his free and now shaking hand, he pulls back entirely and just looks at you.
He’s out of it, entirely gone from this world as he stares down with his hair drying by the minute from that shower, messy as all hell with darkened hooded eyes. He continues to stare, each thrust against you becoming pointed to the extent that it almost feels like he’s already fucked you for hours.
And then, you feel it. The weight lifting, your shorts being stretched until they’re sliding down your thighs and off of you, and then the warmth as he adjusts his hips just barely enough to line up with your quivering hole, practically begging for him to stretch you out for the first time.
His eyes falter only for a moment when he realizes that this is a moment he will never forget. The way you look up at him with glassy and needy eyes, out of breath, seemingly loving him as much as he’s always loved you.
“Yeah?” He whispers, not breaking eye contact even for a moment.
“Please.” You mutter out, not fully intending for it to sound so broken.
And as broken as your voice was in that instance, he grows much weaker by it. Dropping his head with a deep sigh, a smile, and then a chuckle.
“You really, really, can’t look at me like that and expect me to be gentle…” He pauses to look at you again. “For your sake, please tell me to slow down.”
You can barely comprehend a word he’s saying when you can feel the head of his cock teasing where you need it the most.
“Please.” You rasp out again, wrapping your legs around his waist and forcing his body forward, ultimately sliding the tip of his length into you yourself.
“Oh, fuck–” He chokes out before sucking in a breath and letting out a moan at the feeling. His body jerks at the sensation, the sound of your voice, the way you pulse around him. “Fuck, so good.” He continues to mutter, controlling himself for only a few seconds longer just to see if you have the ability to understand that he truly and honestly will not have the ability to go easy on you at this point.
“Deeper.” You plead, squeezing your legs tighter around him, uncaring of his attempt to control the situation.
That’s all it takes. Your broken voice already had him shaking, and now he’s giving up any and all control that he could have possibly hoped to have.
Right there, with your legs hugging his waist, your hands gripping the pillow behind your head, and his hands finding purchase on either side of your shoulders, he sinks himself into you as deep as he can go and feels as if the life is being choked out of him over how fucking good it feels.
He throws his head back in an erotic and attractive moan of relief, allowing you a glimpse at the expanse of his stretched neck, naked of any marked territory. Still, your vision goes white when the stretch hits you.
So big, so strong on top of you. You can imagine he really could fuck you hard, you hope he doesn’t go gentle on you at all, actually
“Shit, please,” You moan brokenly again, releasing your pillow and gripping his forearms. “Jake, god–” You have no words to describe how good he feels inside of you, you couldn’t begin to fathom trying to explain to him how perfect he is.
It feels deep, deeper than you ever could have imagined. His length alone should have been enough to tell you that, but you hadn’t yet factored in the girth of it. So heavy inside of you, touching each soft and sensitive surface your pussy has to offer.
Your body jolts in adjustment, knocking the breath out of you despite him not moving just yet.
“Shh–” He soothes, not at all actually wanting to hush your cries for him. In fact, he’s simply saying it because he could quite literally release at any moment if you continue to speak and clench him like this. And when he finally looks down at you, he can’t fucking help it.
His hips move at their own volition, and he was right in believing there is no gentle fuck to be had here. He slides out only slightly, with the intent to fuck you as full of him as he can. He wants to stay deep, because you asked, and he wants to keep you feeling stretched around him because he can truly never get over the way you look and sound right now.
You shake at the feeling of him pressing impossibly deeper into you, keeping his hips flush against you before snapping his hips back more now. A slightly empty feeling inside of you being filled once again within a second.
His moans sound beautiful, he feels beautiful, and all you can do is stare up at him with watery eyes and a slack jaw, wondering why it took him so long to do this with you.
Wondering why it took you so long to want it at all, when now, you think you could never feel this good with another person again.
His arms flex in your grasp with each thrust, and his eyes land on each visible part of your body before he weakens his stance and lowers himself to you, hips still fucking you open at a pace that’s only becoming more and more rapid, more and more fucking blinding.
“Yeah, yeah–” Jake suddenly chimes with out of breath words, kissing you before you can comprehend or respond to those words. “No one has ever reacted like this for me–” He continues, pointing his thrusts harder into you. “Feels so good, so tight around me.” He chokes up at the last few words, stuttering his and picking up a different pace.
This time, those harsh thrusts pull back further, emptying you before slowly pressing into you again.
“I want you to remember how this feels,” He continues, seemingly rambling against your lips with each slow thrust. “No one will ever fuck you like I will.”
Your hooded eyes shoot open with arousal at his confident boasting. Those words feel so final, as if it isn’t even a rule, but a logical fact that only the two of you could ever find to be true.
You can’t even manage a response, and instead moan before tucking your lips up and against his neck, using one hand to grip his hair and skew his head.
That once naked and markless neck is no more. He is yours, and you’re lucky enough now to know that this is exactly how he wants you to feel.
“Ahh, you like that?” He questions your reaction to his words, feeling your hips make attempts to meet him halfway with each thrust. “You like when I talk?” He continues to urge your sucking lips to speak out to him, to answer him, to boost his ego just a bit more.
“So much,” You nearly whimper against his neck, moving your lips to another spot. “Love when you’re confident like this–”
He’s in heaven hearing those words. As if it’s a confirmation that he wasn’t just talking dirty. You both truly take those words and will fuck by them from this point forward. He truly doesn’t want anyone else, and hopefully, you’d never give another person the chance to make an attempt to fuck you the way he does.
And then the room falls silent again, as if Jake is focused on reminding you with each passing second that he’s never been more sure or right of something in his life. Despite you already believing him, the way his cock pulses inside of you is enough of a reminder even if he had never said it in the first place.
His pace quickens again, and then slows, and then stutters. Only to fall back into a good rhythm before his entire body starts to shake through the act.
You wonder if this is it. Is this how his body reacts when he’s about to cum? Is this what his face looks like? Is this what his eyes do? Did his arms strain like this the first time? Did his moans come out as choked and desperate?
None of that matters, because as quickly as it started, he buries himself into you again and stays in that one spot, shaking and timidly looking down at you.
“Don’t move, please, don’t move.” He practically begs, losing himself to the way your hips chase the feeling of constant stimulation. “Stop moving.” He pleads again, pulling his chest from you and sitting up on his knees, keeping his cock in place deep within you.
You watch him, unable to keep your hips still, and he watches you– trying to keep his orgasm under control before seeing your fingers trail down your stomach and to your clit.
There, he loses himself, watching you rub the soft spot just above where his cock stuffs you full.
“I can’t,” He chokes out, snapping his hips back and allowing himself to get lost in the feeling. “Fuck, I really can’t.” He continues to mutter out, pressing his strings of cum ever deeper inside of you as he feels every muscle in his body tense.
It feels so sensitive, but he can’t stop moving, feeling his cum fill you up to the point it’s surely being pressed out of you by his desperate length wanting nothing more than to stay inside of you.
You moan through it with him, encouraging him to lose himself inside of you, and he’s so beautiful when he does it. The fact that he does it at all has your body tensing on its own. Teetering on the edge of your own orgasm with the way your fingers almost aggressively chase after the feeling he appears to still be releasing inside of you.
And then, emptiness. You are left empty and dripping, fingers still chasing your release before–
“What the fu–” You moan, squeezing your eyes shut at the feeling of his tongue instantly back on you. As if he’s looping back to the beginning of it all, uncaring of tasting himself solely because through it all, he can still taste you. “Jake, Fuck–yes, right there.” You continue to groan when he replaces his tongue against your hole with his fingers, fucking into you as quickly as he can before nudging your fingers away and taking over the chase of your orgasm.
You’re entirely amazed by how eager he is to pull it from you, and that alone is enough. The desperate ways in which he decided to pleasure you right in this moment, it’s enough.
Your hands instantly reach for his hair, gripping so tightly that you can hear the pained sound he lets out at the sheer force behind it. You very nearly rub his nose in the mess he’s made of you out of the sheer arousal you feel through your orgasm.
You’re seeing white, feeling his fingers expertly work you open and somehow don’t feel disappointed at all that you didn’t get there before he pulled out of you. You can still feel him dripping out, fingers squelching and sliding through the mixture of both orgasms inside of you. And his tongue, good lord his fucking tongue, licking up every bit and eagerly flicking your clit at a pace much faster than he offered before.
And now, you find your legs nearly kicking him across the room. As soon as the orgasm subsides, your body goes into overdrive with the overwhelming sensitivity between your legs and all he can do is laugh at the way you practically do kick him.
Right off the bed, actually, he tumbles.
You lay there, staring into space as you attempt to bring yourself back to reality when you see his messy hair and glistening eyes peek from the edge of your bed at you. His shoulders huffing with each deep breath he takes.
“Jesus fucking christ.” You manage to gasp out, spread eagle and almost completely naked on your bed save for the forgotten shirt that’s still pushed up to your collarbone.
He makes his way back up to you, pressing your legs together, lowering your shirt, and planting his heavy dead-weight right on top of you.
A solid ten minutes pass as the two of you lay there in the mess you’ve both created. Heavy breaths turn to easy, balanced breaths together. You can barely hold your eyes open when he finally rolls off of you and right up against your side.
“Can I ask you something?” He mutters, throat dry and stomach growling embarrassingly loud.
“Hm?” You hum out, entirely ready to just sleep in the mess.
“Are you always like that?” He questions, a little hint of doubt breaking his confidence. “Like, did Sunghoon see you act like that too?”
You crack your eyes open and instantly turn to face him.
“You’re insane if you think Sunghoon is that good. I’ve never used the word ‘please’ in my life.”
Jake glances away, thinking to himself and letting those words sink in.
“Well,” He starts, pausing and feeling that little pit in his stomach return. “That’s a lie because I’ve heard you use your manners at least twice in the years I’ve known you.”
You smile, loving that the two of you can still be somewhat catty and playful even after the fact that you just realized how insanely in love with him you are.
“Jake, no one has ever made me act like this in bed.” You try to reassure him. “I don’t think anyone else could, besides you.”
He smiles with a nod, running his hands down your body before pausing at the half dried cum that managed to make its way up to your stomach. And then? He groans.
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
It’s insane really, that all it took for you to fall in love with the person you think you were always meant to love was him admitting it. Even more insane that he decided to take the route that involved faux playful head, with no feelings attached despite his feelings being deeply fucking attached.
Still, the route taken to get to this point, he thinks, is fitting for the two of you. Especially now that he can look at Sunghoon without wanting to strangle him, and he can look at you knowing you’d very much invite him to strangle you, you know, considering the fact that you’re now trying to explore every sexual realm in the fucking universe with him.
Even with the desperate need to have you under him any chance he gets, and the fucking, and the arousal, none of it shines brighter than the small intimate moments he has with you that aren’t weighed down by pining or lust.
As playful as the two of you are together, there is so much love here. So much love to still be discovered too, and he can’t help but feel excited by it.
Romance isn’t dead, despite how the two of you tried to fucking butcher it.
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sharing | hyung line
who shares their girl with who in enha hyung line
pairing: enha hyung line x fem!reader
includes: threesomes, sucking dick, fingering, pussy eating, cum swallowing, hand job, nipple play (lmk if i missed anything).
heeseung .ೃ࿐
heeseung would share you with jake. he knows just from the way jake looks at you that he would make you feel good, better than any of the other guys would. jake was very loving and attentive, which is all that heeseung would want for his baby.
“he making you feel good, baby?” heeseung whispered in your ear, sending chills throughout your overheated body.
you had your head laying in his lap and he played with your hair while jake was situated between your thighs, dazed out while he was lapping at your pussy.
“yeah,” you mewled, jutting your hips into jake’s mouth, “but i want you to feel good too.”
heeseung’s heart melted slightly at the fact you still cared about him and his pleasure, even while getting your pussy eaten by his best friend.
that was how the position changed and suddenly you were on your hands and knees sucking heeseung’s heavy cock while jake ate you from behind.
he had your legs spread and stuffed his face into your pussy, moaning against your folds. you were gagging on heeseung’s cock every time it hit you in the back of the throat.
jake gets so pussy drunk so easily he’d probably start crushing on you just because of how sweet your pussy tasted around his tongue. would literally dream about the day heeseung let him eat out his girlfriend for MONTHS and beg to let him do it again.
jay *ೃ༄
i could see jay not wanting ANY of them to go anywhere NEAR his girl, but if he absolutely had to he would probably choose heeseung. heeseung was the oldest so jay trusted that he would know how to act around his girl.
and heeseung surprisingly did know his way around making you feel good. he watched with focused eyes on your reactions as he stuffed you full of his fingers, adding more and more and seeing how you liked it.
“fuck,” he muttered, watching you throw your head back in pleasure after he added a fourth finger into your tight, stuffed pussy. “she’s so fuckin’ hot.”
you were leaking arousal around his fingers, dripping down the side of his hand. you were loving this, clearly.
“good girl,” jay cooed, moving some hair out of your face. “open up, baby. let’s get both your holes full.”
he stuffed his cock into your mouth, ruthlessly fucking your throat while heeseung fingered you with an entire four fingers. you came multiple times over his fingers, each orgasm more intense than the last, and watched in awe as he brought his glistening fingers up to his mouth to taste you.
it didn’t take long for jay to shoot his warm, salty seed down your throat, filling up your tummy as well.
jake ੈ✩‧₊˚
jake would have trouble sharing you with anyone but if he had to choose, it would of course be sunghoon. sunghoon is practically jake’s brother so he felt comfortable letting sunghoon have fun with his girl, but he will absolutely NOT let anyone else fuck you. that’s for jake and jake only.
he watched with a nervous expression as sunghoon’s middle finger slid inside your shiny hole. you moaned, clenching around his finger while jake held your hand. his grip grew tighter and tighter as sunghoon massaged his finger inside of you.
“does it feel good?” he asked, kissing up your neck.
sunghoon added a second finger alongside his middle.
“f-fuck,” you whispered, feeling your hole stretch around sunghoon’s long fingers. “yeah.”
you tilted jake’s head up and attached your lips together. jake moaned into the kiss and slid his tongue into your mouth while you spread your legs even wider for sunghoon to slide in yet another finger inside you.
“so nice and tight,” sunghoon grunted, feeling you clench around his hand. “bet it feels insane fucking her.”
“don’t even think about it,” jake scolded, momentarily pulling away from your lips.
you moaned, a string of saliva connecting yours and jake’s lips.
jake lifted the fabric of your shirt up to your shoulders and started rubbing your sensitive nipples, only adding to the pleasure you were getting from sunghoon.
a few minutes later, with your lips attached to jake’s again and his fingers on your tits, you came all over sunghoon’s fingers.
sunghoon ༊*·˚
honestly i could see him allowing any of the older ones to mess around with you. he trusted all of them and knew they’d make you feel good, but he didn’t want to share you with that many people, so he chose jay.
however, choosing jay meant a lot of bickering back and forth as they both tried to pleasure you.
“she doesn’t like it like that,” sunghoon commented, watching jay circle his tongue over your clit.
“i think i know how to give a girl head,” jay retorted, irritated.
“not my girl,” sunghoon mumbled.
jay rolled his eyes as he stuffed his tongue into your cunt. sunghoon’s jaw clenched as he just sat there and watched, wishing he was the one between your legs instead.
then suddenly, he felt your hand crawl onto his lap and grip his throbbing bulge over his pants. it was like you knew he was feeling left out.
he ended up kneeling beside your head as you jerked off his pretty, long cock while jay ate you out. as weird as he felt about it, sunghoon admittedly found it pretty hot to watch you get eaten out by his best friend, and ended up cumming way too soon all over your pretty little face.
you came shortly after in jay’s mouth, who then smirked cockily at sunghoon with his glistening in your arousal.
sunghoon figured he’d let jake have you next time instead.
-
���💨😮💨i tried to be logical about this. lmk if u agree and what pairing you want to tag team you LOL
personally i need a fivesome with all of them <3
thanks for reading!
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— 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐤𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐲
➺ PAIRING: jay park x female reader
➺ GENRE: hybrid au, smut
➺ SUMMARY: the story of how you end up spending a week alone with your owner’s hot friend.
➺ CW/TW: cat hybrid!reader, heeseung as reader’s owner, (slight) somnophilia, fingering, oral sex (f & m), unprotected sex, squirting, creampies, overstimulation, multiple rounds
➺ WC: 5k
NOTE: don’t like, don’t read.
“Please?”
Once Heeseung looks into your wide, pleading eyes he knows he’s done for. From the moment he adopted you, he’s never been able to deny any of your requests no matter how unreasonable they were. This time is no different. The only difference is that now he’s also going to make your wish his friend’s problem.
“Okay,” he concedes quickly. “But only if Jay says yes. If not, you’ll have to stay with Jake.”
You can’t hide your excitement. “Thank you, Seungie!”
Your owner laughs joyfully when you throw your arms around him and affectionately nuzzle your cheek against his. As usual, you’ve coaxed him into giving you what you want. That’s part of the reason you love him so much. There isn’t anything he won’t do to make you happy.
“I’ll call him now and ask if he’ll look after you while I’m gone,” Heeseung says as he gets up from the couch.
You give him a nod, settling back on the cushions as he gets his hot friend on the phone. Once you hear the door to Heeseung’s room close, you jump off the couch with a squeal. You skip over to your room, heart racing as you think about the fact that you’re going to spend an entire week with Jay, alone. There’s no doubt in your mind that he’ll say yes since Heeseung is the one asking. You giddily start to pack your bags, knowing your owner will come into your room shortly to tell you the good news.
“She wants to stay with me?”
Heeseung laughs at his friend’s disbelief. “Yeah. I’ve told you before that Y/N really likes you.”
“Uh,” Jay swallows nervously. “Really?”
His friend laughs again, but Jay can’t see the humor in the situation. It’s not that he doesn’t want to help his friend out, but he’s always thought that you hate him. Almost every time he visited Heeseung, you stayed in your room until he left. On the off chance that you didn’t hide away in your room, you were glued to your owner’s side and shied away from any attention Jay tried to give you.
At first, he thought that’s all it was—you being shy. However, when he spoke to Sunghoon and Jake, he found out that you were an extremely friendly cat. They even showed him cute pictures and videos to prove it.
“Yes, bro. She wouldn’t ask to stay with you if she didn’t.”
Jay licks his lips and scratches his temple. “Okay, yeah. Y/N can stay with me.”
He can picture Heeseung’s bright smile. “Thanks! I’ll stop by on Friday to drop her off.”
“Sounds good.”
“I really do appreciate it.”
When Heeseung hangs up, Jay flops back on his bed. His heart pounds harshly against his ribcage as he thinks about what he’s agreed to. Maybe this will be an opportunity for you and him to finally get closer. Somehow, he manages to push past the nerves he feels to remind himself that will be a good thing.
On Friday, you’re practically skipping with joy as Heeseung leads you to his friend’s apartment. You swing your intertwined hands back and forth as your nose picks up on all the new scents surrounding you. Heeseung smiles fondly as he goes to knock on his friend’s door. He can tell you’re excited about being in a new place, and it makes him less worried about leaving you for a week.
You suck in a quiet break when the door opens. Jay looks extremely good, and you can’t keep your eyes off of him as your owner gives him one of those man-hugs that male humans do.
“Hey, Y/N,” Jay gives you a friendly smile after he separates from his friend.
“Hi,” you say shyly, barely resisting the urge to hide behind Heeseung.
You’re led inside a second later, and you can’t keep your eyes from examining every inch of the place. It’s nice and spacious. The more you look around, the more excited you are for your stay.
“I prepared the guest room for you,” Jay says as he leads you down the hall to a nice, spacious room.
You let go of Heeseung’s hand as you venture further into the room. It’s nice and comfy-looking, but it doesn’t really smell like Jay. Like at all. You try not to frown as you thank him sweetly. He seems relieved that you don’t dislike it.
Heeseung sets your bags down on the bed, smiling a little sadly at you. “Okay, well I have to leave now if I want to catch my flight.”
You pout slightly but nod and follow the two men to the living room. Although you are excited to be left alone with Jay, part of you feels sad. You’ve never been away from your owner for this long before.
Heeseung stops and gives you a sweet smile that you love so much. “Y/N. Be a good girl while I’m gone.”
You roll your eyes, but nod obediently anyway. “I promise I’ll be good, Hee.”
Your owner gives you a warm hug, whispering promises to be back soon.
After Heeseung leaves, Jay invites you to watch a movie with him. He’s nervous and shy, but the feelings slowly dissolve when you happily agree and join him on the couch.
“Can we cuddle?” You ask boldly, tail swishing behind you.
Jay swallows thickly. He can’t look away from you. The way you asked was so sweet that he knows if you were ever to ask him for anything else, he wouldn’t be able to say no.
“We can’t?” Your ears flatten against your head as your lips form a pout.
“W-We can,” Jay rushes out, feeling a blush crawl up his neck. “It’s just—you don’t have to ask.”
You grin and pounce on him. Jay laughs as you crawl on his lap and nuzzle your head under his chin. He holds you close to him as your sleek tail wraps around his waist.
“Heeseung always tells me to ask before I cuddle humans,” you explain as you press yourself closer to him.
Jay licks his lips and closes his eyes when you start to purr. One of his hands gently caresses your hips while the other gently smooths up and down your calf. You grin into his neck, happy that you decided to wear a skirt. All of your plans are slowly coming together, and you know by the end of the week, you’ll have Jay exactly where you want him.
When the night rolls around, you put on the cute nightie Heeseung bought you on your birthday. You wait for a bit before you tiptoe to Jay’s bedroom. Luckily the door is open, and he’s standing by his bed. He’s in nothing but a pair of sweats with his hair still wet from his shower. You bite your lip as your eyes linger on his muscular torso.
“Jay,” you call softly, making sure to keep your eyes on his face.
“Y/N,” Jay’s face is a little flushed. His eyes soften when he sees the hesitant expression on your face. “What’s wrong?”
Your ears twitch as you play with your thumbs. “I-I’m not really used to sleeping alone anymore. I thought I would be okay, but…”
Jay’s heart clenches. You look so nervous and shy. Heeseung never mentioned that you still had trouble sleeping alone. Maybe it’s because you miss him so much that you can’t sleep. So, he ignores the harsh beat of his heart to give you a warm smile.
“You can sleep with me… if you want.”
You nod shyly, mumbling out a quiet okay before slowly entering his room. Jay draws the covers for you, waiting until you’re settling in his bed to get in next to you. His heart is pounding when you cuddle up to his side. You breathe out a sigh of relief when Jay wraps an arm around you to pull you closer.
It’s easy for you to fall asleep in his warm embrace, and all you can think about is how you’ll have Jay wrapped around your finger by the end of the week.
Jay feels like the worst friend ever.
You’re extremely precious to Heeseung, yet here he is, lusting after you. It’s not his fault you’re extremely lovable and beautiful. You’re extremely sweet and cute. Anything you do makes him feel an intense amount of affection. He’d be made of stone if he didn’t feel anything for you at all.
Honestly, he can’t feel too bad since it’s obvious that you feel the same way about him. It’s why he’s woken up to you nuzzling his cock through his underwear for three days straight. Today, he doesn’t feel like pretending to be asleep until you stop. When he quietly groans out your name, it only encourages you.
You mewl and whine as you press your face closer to his bulge to rub your cheek against it. Jay coos at you, moving his hand to gently caress one of your soft ears. That’s all the encouragement you need to give his thick cock a kitten lick. Your tongue wets his hardening cock through his underwear. Jay can’t keep quiet as you grow more eager with your movements, soaking the fabric until it’s sticking to his dick.
By now, Jay’s fully hard. He keeps groaning as he lets you have your way with his cock. Finally, you have enough and decide you want to taste the real thing. You lift your head and bite your lip. Dark eyes stare at you with heat as your sleep tail swishes behind you. Without any hesitation, you pull his underwear down his thighs, moaning when you see his big cock slap against his lower abdomen. It’s twitching and leaking with precum that’s ready to be lapped up.
Your eyes gleam as you go to get your treat. Jay moans loudly when you start to suckle his tip. You mewl as your rough tongue laps at his slit repeatedly, eagerly licking up all the precum dripping from his cock.
“Fuck, kitten,” Jay groans, voice thick with sleep. “Couldn’t wait until I woke up, hm?”
You stare at him as your tongue lolls out to messily lap at his sticky tip. The whine you let out is so cute that Jay can’t stop himself from petting your twitching ears.
You pout at him cutely. “Just wanted a taste.”
“Yeah?” Jay groans as his hips shift, nudging your mouth with his cock. He curses under his breath when you take his aching dick into your mouth. “Pretty kitty just wanted some cream, huh?”
You moan in confirmation, eagerly taking his thick cock down your throat. Saliva drips from the corners of your mouth as you bob your head up and down. Jay moans loudly as your tongue caresses the tip of his dick, slurping up all the precum greedily. His eyes almost cross from how good your hot little mouth feels. He’s never had anyone else give him head like this, and he knows that nothing else will ever compare.
“God, baby,” Jay groans when you release his cock with a lewd pop and start to lick your way down to his balls.
He spreads his legs when you take his sac into your mouth. You whine as you suckle and lick at the sensitive skin. The vibrations from the sounds you’re making make him moan loudly. His cock is leaking steadily now. Precum drips down his throbbing length and down to his balls. Your eyes zero in on the shiny trail it leaves behind. You pull away from his balls, leaving them coated in your saliva. Jay tries not to cum when you start to lick back up his cock, lapping up his precum with a wanton mewl.
“You got my cum all over your lips, kitten,” Jay pants, cock pulsing and leaking with more precum for you to lap up. “Such a messy girl.”
The way he’s gazing at you fondly makes your cunt clench around nothing. Your tail sways excitedly as you hum against his cock. “Your messy girl.”
With that, you open your mouth to take his cock back into your mouth. You swallow as much of it as you can take. Jay groans again, hips bucking up to sink his cock further down your throat. He’s petting your ears as his balls start to tighten up.
“I’m close, baby,” Jay groans.
You moan in satisfaction and relax your mouth to sink further down on his cock. His leaking tip hits the back of your throat, which makes Jay let out a guttural groan.
“Fuck—Y/N!”
You feel his big cock pulse wildly before his orgasm hits. Ropes of hot cum spill into your mouth, and you eagerly swallow it all. Jay’s pretty face contorts into a blissful expression as you pull your mouth up and let him shoot the rest of his load on your tongue. Your tail sways back and forth as your mouth fills with his hot cum. You swallow every last drop before you start to lave your rough tongue across his twitching cock to clean up anything you missed.
“Tastes so good,” you moan before kissing the tip of his dick.
Jay sits up and yanks you toward him. You whine when he smashes his lips on yours, kissing you messily. He pulls you closer until you’re practically on his lap. You moan into his mouth when he forces his tongue past your lips to taste you. Jay’s large hands squeeze your hips as his tongue smooths over your own. His mind is swimming, and he can’t help but think that you taste so much sweeter when you’re mixed with him.
When Jay finally separates from you, his gaze is dark. Those hungry eyes slowly trail down your body. Jay bites his lips before he goes to pull off your nightie. He lets out a groan when he sees your naked body on display for him. The sultry look on your face is starting to drive him crazy. With your cute tail swishing back and forth excitedly, he knows he’s got you exactly where he wants you.
Large hands trail down your body until one of them is cupping your hot cunt. You mewl and keen into Jay’s hand when his fingers gently trace over your slit. He licks his lips. “You’ll let me play with your little pussy, won’t you, baby?”
You moan with a nod, grinding down into his hand. “Yes, fuck. Want you so bad, Jay.”
“I know, kitten,” his voice is full of lust. “Don’t worry. I’m going to stuff your pretty little cunt until it’s the shape of my cock.”
You yowl when he manhandles you onto your hands and knees. He does it so effortlessly that you can feel more slick drip out of you. Jay gets behind you, groaning when he sees your arousal covering your thighs.
“Fuck, kitty. You’re fucking soaked,” Jay growls heatedly as he palms your ass.
He almost loses it when he sees your hole clench in need. Jay spreads your ass and buries his face in your pussy. His hot tongue parts your slit to lap up all your juices before he moves on to your clit. He starts to lap at it like a starved man, moaning into your heat like you did around his cock. His tongue flicks your puffy bud, licking up every last drop of your arousal. You cry out as his hungry mouth devours your cunt.
“So fucking sweet. Can’t wait to fuck your pretty little pussy.”
You whine loudly when he pulls away from your cunt. The empty feeling is quickly soothed when you feel him spit on it before diving back in to fuck his tongue into your hole. Unabashed moans fall from your lips as you buck your pussy back into his mouth. You whimper in pleasure when Jay slips two fingers into your clenching pussy. He angles his wrist to push more juices out of your squelching cunt. Almost immediately, he finds your g-spot. Your legs start to shake when he starts to rub that soft spot inside you.
“Oh fuck,” you wail, hips rutting back eagerly. “God, Jay. Feels so fucking good. I’m gonna—”
The way you’re gushing into his mouth and fingers makes Jay grin deviously. “You’re gonna cum already, baby? Or are you gonna squirt for me?”
You mewl, embarrassed that he can tell. “Fuck, Jay. Y-You can’t just…”
“Can’t what, kitty?” Jay laughs teasingly. “Just do it for me, yeah? I wanna feel you squirt on my tongue.”
With that, his tongue dives back into your pulsing cunt. The mind-numbing rhythm of his fingers and tongue pushes you over the edge quickly. With a loud moan of his name, you clamp down on his fingers and cum. Your cunt gushes slick all over his face and hand, completely drenching him in your juices. You can’t even feel embarrassed because pleasure clouds all of your senses and thoughts.
“Fuck, kitten. That’s it,” Jay moans into your pussy as he greedily laps up everything you’re releasing.
You mewl loudly as he licks you clean. His tongue smooths over your sensitive bundle of nerves until you’re trembling against him. Jay groans into your heat one last time before deciding you’re ready to take his cock. Just before he pulls away, he presses a gentle kiss on your pussy.
Jay kneels behind you, nudging the head of his cock against your slick entrance. His large hands spread your ass so he gets a full view of how your little hole stretches open for his fat cock. The strangled moan he lets out as he sinks into your hot cunt mixes in with your loud cry of pleasure. He bottoms out with one rough thrust. Your ears twitch as his pelvis rests flush against your ass.
You moan loudly when Jay caresses your tail, stroking it from the base until you’re bucking your hips against him and gushing all over his thick cock.
“Jay!” You cry out as your claws dig into his sheets.
“Such a pretty kitty,” Jay’s grunt is deep as he pumps his cock in and out of your sopping cunt. “Tight little pussy’s gonna milk me dry.”
He slaps your ass before he yanks on your tail. You cry out wantonly, pussy tightening around him as your eyes roll to the back of your skull. Jay keeps pounding into your dripping cunt mercilessly. He’s splitting you open just like he promised, and you love every second of it.
“Harder,” you whine, ass bouncing back to meet his rough movements. “Fuck. Want more. Please.”
Jay smirks through a pleased groan. He grabs your arms and pulls your body backward into a pretty arch. His cock throbs inside you as your pussy flutters and pulses at the new angle. It feels like he’s fucking his cock deeper into you. You moan about how much you love it since it feels like his leaking tip is practically slamming into your womb.
“Didn’t know you were such a cockhungry kitty,” Jay’s deep laugh makes you tighten around his cock again.
You let out a broken whine, eyes rolling back as he splits you open. Slick is dripping down your thighs, filling the air with a wet plap plap plap sound every time Jay rolls his hips against you. His heavy balls slap your aching clit with every rough thrust, and it just pushes you closer to your climax.
“I-It’s too much, Jay!” You cry out as he keeps drilling his aching cock into you.
His laugh is dark and so damn attractive. “You can take it, baby. You’ll take everything I give you like a good girl, right?”
A deep affection warms his chest and makes his cock twitch when you obediently nod as your rough tongue lolls out of your mouth. You’re already so fucked out that he just wants to keep that look on your face for the rest of the day.
“Good kitty,” Jay moans, hand going up to pet your soft ears. “Now squeeze your hot little pussy on my cock so I can cream it like you want.”
You do as he says, moaning loudly as your tight walls clamp down on his cock. Your legs tremble as your second orgasm hits you all full force. Pleasure consumes your entire body as you gush all over Jay’s cock.
“That’s it, baby. Shit. Good fucking girl,” Jay groans as he fucks his cock into you harder.
His hips stutter slightly, rutting against your ass when he can no longer hold back his own orgasm. Jay spills his thick load inside you. His hot cum paints your walls, and you can only mewl and take it all pliantly.
Just when you think Jay’s done, he slips one hand down to your slippery clit. His fingers rub your sensitive bud as he starts to fuck his cum deeper into you.
“Jay!” You cry out as your hips instinctively move to meet his movements.
His fingers rub fast circles on your clit until a second orgasm coats his cock again. You cry out loudly, claws digging into the couch. Jay moans along with you, slamming his dick into your sloppy hole to help you ride out your orgasm.
“God, baby. You’re gonna drive me crazy,” Jay’s voice is completely sated as he caresses your ass.
You shiver when Jay slowly pulls out of you with a low hiss. A deep groan spills from his lips when he sees your pretty pussy leaking with his cum. Something primal inside him snaps when he sees your cute little pussy dripping with his seed. His pupils dilate as he goes to spread your puffy lips, making his cum drip down your thighs.
“Jay,” you mewl as your cunt throbs with need. “Want more.”
Jay licks his lips as he fingers his cum back into your messy pussy. “Yeah? You want me to fuck your little pussy raw until you’re dripping with cum?”
Your moan is like music to his ears. “Yes, fuck. Want your cum so bad!”
Jay slaps your ass before he flips you on your back. “Dirty kitty. Just so hungry for this cock, huh?”
You mewl cutely and nod. Dark eyes stare at you, and it makes your pussy pulse with anticipation. At that moment, you that Jay is insatiable.
“I’m gonna breed this pussy all day long,” his growl makes you drip with more arousal.
Jay holds your thighs open as he sinks his cock back into your sloppy pussy. Almost instantly, you’re reduced to a fucked out mess. Your lips sloppily capture Jay’s as his fat cock spears you open. Wet squelching sounds fill the room and mix in perfectly with your desperate gasps and filthy moans. Each one of Jay’s crazed thrusts sends you further into a mindless state.
“You like it when I fuck you here, baby?” Jay rasps as his thick cock drills into you. “Like how I’m making a mess out of this little pussy?”
You mewl desperately as your hips roll to meet his harsh movements. By now, you’re acting like a desperate animal searching for release. His leaking tip keeps slamming into your g-spot, and you know it won’t be long before you’re creaming on his big cock all over again.
Jay lets out a laugh when your mouth drops open in a silent moan. He can tell you’re so cock drunk that you probably wouldn’t be able to tell him your own name if he asks. This only makes him pound into your plushy pussy harder, eager to hear you scream for him.
“J-Jaaay,” you whine wantonly.
Once again, he laughs quietly, and leans in close. “What is it?”
You don’t immediately answer him and his mouth latches on your neck, nipping patiently. “C’mon, kitty. Use your words.”
But you literally can’t, especially when he licks a hot stripe on your neck. It all feels so good that the only thing you can think about is his cock. Eventually, you manage to speak, even if it’s just a fucked out mess of words.
“S-So good,” you mewl, eyes almost crossing. “Fu-Fuck! Love your cock!”
“That’s right, baby,” Jay groans as he starts to thrust into you with renewed urgency. “I’m fucking you real good, huh? Pretty kitty can’t get enough of this cock.”
“Yes!” You wail loudly. “It’s so good! So so good!”
Your cries get louder when Jay grabs the plush of your thighs and pushes them into your abdomen. The new angle lets him fuck his cock deeper inside you. A loud moan tears from your throat as Jay starts slamming into you at a relentless pace. It’s not long before a familiar feeling starts to build in the pit of your stomach.
You whine and dig your nails into Jay’s forearms. “Fuck. I’m so close. Gonna cum!”
Jay smashes his mouth on yours in a sloppy kiss. He needs to feel you cream on his cock again. It’s so addicting—just like you. With one last hard thrust, you’re pushed over the edge and cum on his dick hard. Jay swallows your wanton cries of pleasure as your tight walls spasm around his cock. He keeps slamming his cock into you without mercy, needing to fuck you through it.
“I’m gonna fill you up,” Jay groans the promise against your lips. “Fuck. Gonna cream this tight pussy. Get ready to take it all, baby.”
His leaking tip that spongy spot inside you again, and that’s all he needs to release his seed inside you. Hot ropes of cum fill your pussy until it’s frothing at the base of his cock where you two are connected. The way he keeps fucking into you triggers another orgasm from you, this one more powerful than the last. You squirt all over his throbbing cock, covering his balls and lower abdomen with your juices.
Jay moans delightedly, pressing you into a position he’s dreamed of having you in. You’re completely overstimulated at this point, but you love the mating press you’ve been put in. Heavy balls slap against your ass with every sloppy thrust, and you briefly think that this is what heaven must feel like.
“Want more cum?” Jay grins knowingly, loving how you mewl desperately and clamp down on his cock.
Listening to the fucked out noises you let out makes him pound into you harder. You whimper softly as your eyes roll to the back of your head. It feels so fucking good that all you can do is moan like you’re in heat. Everything is reflected in the state of Jay’s bedsheets. They’re soaked with cum and squirt, and the room’s air is thick with the smell of sex. It’s all so filthy, but it only turns you on even more.
“Please,” you beg, needing to be filled again.
You glance down to watch Jay fuck you raw. His big cock is dripping with your mixed cum. Your pussy pulses at the filthy sight, especially when you notice the remnants from the previous rounds sticking to his thighs.
“I’ll give it to you,” Jay coos, cock throbbing as his climax steadily approaches. “Pretty little kitty’s earned some more cream.”
You moan loudly when you feel him spill into you again.
After that, Jay puts you in every position he wants and fills you with cum to your heart’s content. Finally, you end up on top of him. He’s mindlessly bouncing you on his cock, fucking you like you’re his personal fucktoy.
“That’s it, baby,” Jay growls as he kneads your ass, moving you up and down on his cock at an agonizingly slow pace.
Your hot cunt engulfs his cock deliciously. It gets tighter and tighter every time his hips thrust up to meet your movements. Your pussy is already full of his cum, but Jay can’t stop fucking you. He’s completely hooked on your pussy, and every orgasm he’s had so far only makes his cock harder and his balls tighter. Being buried all the way inside you feels too good for him to even think about stopping.
“God, kitten. You were just made to take cock, huh?”
Jay’s thrusts are slow and deep, still making sure he’s putting your pleasure above his. In all his greed, he makes sure to hit all the right spots so you cream on his cock again.
“Jay,” you moan when he lets go of one of your ass cheeks to caress your tail.
The way you moan his name makes him bounce you on his cock faster. You cry out in pleasure as your warm pussy squeezes him. A mix of your cream and his cum coat his dick to form a ring at the base of it. He’s already pulled so many orgasms from you that it’s hard to keep count, but even though you’re overstimulated you don’t think to ask him to stop.
Jay’s eyes are focused on your face. He’s basking in the pretty faces you’re making now that you’re completely fucked out. His eyes roll to the back of his head as he starts to thrust deeper and harder into your sloppy pussy. Jay’s large hands pull your hips all the way down until you’re both cumming.
“Fuck, kitty,” Jay groans as his cock head spurts with cum. “So fucking good.”
You mewl and shove your face into his neck, purring in complete delight. The both of you are breathing heavily as you slowly come down from your highs. Neither of you make a move to separate. Jay presses sweet kisses to your hair and rubs your back soothingly as his cock pulses inside you.
“You did so good for me, baby,” he coos.
You hum into the underside of his jaw. “Loved it so much.”
Jay grins, ignoring his vibrating phone on the nightstand. He’s too busy clinging to you to read the message from Heeseung that says he’s going to come back early to surprise you.
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gif by @yutaslaugh I'm a huge fan of your gifs.
A little birthday project for our favorite rockstar and the cause of this blog. Inspired by the songs in his first solo album. Happy Birthday, Yuta Nakamoto. (even if you cannot read this)
characters: demon! incubus! Yuta x human! female! Y/N (feat, little devils! Yu and Uta) word count: 16k words (I'm sorry) genre: smut, fluff, angst summary: He's a demon. She's a human. What makes her so special? warnings: (please bare with me because this is too much) demon theme, hell, prisoner, chains, cage, adoption, mentions of gambling, mentions of killing, mentions of death, arson, self-exits, death, suicidal thoughts, blood, summoning a demon (kind of), description of demons, kissing a stranger, boob sucking, riding, penetrative sex, public sex, giant wings, vivid horny dreams, orgasm, mention of pill, crazy hallucinations, finger sucking, fingering, pussy eating, semi-public sex, standing sex, quickie, nightmares, mentioned blowjob, a little fat shaming, violence, suspected pregnancy, accident, drowning, stabbing
a/n: Since this is loosely based on the songs in the album, please know that I'm pushing some scenes and concepts. The whole fic might not as coherent as I wanted it to be. I'm sorry for the fast-paced plot. Also, the preface of the story is based on the manga titled Hana's Demons of Lust so please don't call me out on some similarities. I swear, I tried. I tried editing this before posting but as usual, there might be some errors. Please just let me know. Feedbacks are highly appreciated, please just comment anything. Thank you for reading this fic. 🥰
PROLOGUE: HOPE
Hell had always been hell.
A hot place full of agony. An evil place full of torment.
There’s certainly no joy without torment.
And Yuta had always despised the place.
It was a scorching hot place filled with ear-piercing screams of tortured souls. Evil souls that doesn’t need mercy.
Souls that had done the worst in mankind.
Like him.
A prisoner, chained and caged, in hell.
There’s really no hope for him.
Hell is such a bad place.
I. LAST SONG
Y/N had always had a very different life.
Even at a young age, she knew that she was adopted. Her adoptive mom would always tell her the story of how she and her husband had a hard time conceiving a child so they asked a psychic for advice. The woman just gave them an address and there was Y/N’s mother, giving birth on the floor, on her own. Growing up, she didn’t know whether to believe in that story. Isn’t it too coincidental? They could just tell her that her birth mother gave her up for adoption instead of concocting an absurd tale like this.
Yet, Y/N had always felt the love of her adoptive parents.
They shower her with guidance and love no daughter could ever imagine. They sent her to some of the prestigious schools, even spending lavish amounts of money just on her. Then it all drained down when the father of the house started getting addicted to gambling.
It was a hard transition in their life.
Instead of attending college abroad, Y/N had to work all these part-time jobs for both her parents who only keep on fighting non-stop. In the morning, she would work in a small coffee shop near their home. During lunch, she would serve tables at a diner. Then at night, she would work until midnight in a local gas station. She might get lucky if she got enough sleep rather than worrying about her father’s whereabouts and her mother’s repeatedly crying.
A lot of times she had thought about ending it all.
If only she died with her birth mother when she was a newborn, this wouldn’t even have happened.
Because obviously, the problem had been her all along.
The couple shouldn’t have spent so much on a stranger living in their home, they might have saved a lot of money to spend lavishly on their own.
Clearly, the problem is her appearing in their life.
Maybe it is truly better to end it all.
But the worst is yet to come.
She was heading to her last part-time job of the day when her phone rang with an unknown number. The second time it called, she answered with a confused hello before a male voice answered, “Are you Ms. Y/N Y/LN?” The girl only hummed in answer, “I’m from the Fire Department. We’re sorry but your house was set on fire.” The shock in her system almost deafened her. What? A fire? But the house was fine when she left that morning. “We’re also sorry, we cannot save your parents.”
It was all so unfair. She’s the one who wants to die. Why would they race her to it? Why would they even hug each other after setting their own house on fire? Her parents must be out of their minds.
They should have waited for her so they could end this misery together.
It was the longest week of her life. She had to hold a funeral ceremony for her parents alone. She had to look for a place to stay. She had to look for money to get by. Even if their property was charred from the fire and her parents died, she cannot receive any insurance since it was their doing in the first place. Since she was adopted, no one in her parents’ relatives wanted to take her in.
Maybe she’s really meant to be alone in life.
Y/N didn’t know how she reached this part of the forest. She was just looking for a place to put her parents’ ashes and maybe move on with her life. How? She still isn’t sure. She isn’t even sure if she wants to move on with her life. But as she walked closer to the dark path of tall trees, she felt her steps heavier.
She doesn’t want to live alone.
Maybe she should just die.
Here.
Where no one could see her.
As she looked around, seated on the dirt, she started thinking of ways to die in this place. This is dark and secluded. Surely, no one would dare to come here. She isn’t even sure why she was here in the first place. If she keeps walking, she’ll surely be lost.
Maybe she could die of hunger. She doesn’t know about the plants and trees around. Maybe she could eat something and wait for it to be poisonous for a quick death.
Or maybe she could die from being eaten by an animal. She wished there was a lion or a bear around that could just ravish her. She knew she didn't have to run, she didn’t even have the energy to do so. But all she could hear were cricket sounds.
Then it hit her, seeing a sharp stone nearby. If she wanted a quick death, she could just kill herself. Like her parents. She didn’t care if she’d be sent to hell because of this. Maybe it was a better place than here.
As she took the sharp stone, she grazed her finger earning a cut that amused her. Blood flowed out of the wound, dropping on the ground. How pathetic.
Before she could take the stone and cut herself once again, she felt the ground shaking. Is it an earthquake? A mountain of dirt started forming in front of her which made her move backward. What the hell is this? Black birds started flying and an ear-piercing screech could be heard. She covered her ear almost immediately but noticed a red light started coming out of the hole from the mountain of dirt.
Y/N’s eyes widened in surprise as a mist of something black started coming out from the source of the red light. A beast-like image started to form, making her rub her eyes in disbelief. Is she dreaming right now? Is this a hallucination? Eyes started forming on the ghoulish creature: bright, red eyes that scared the hell out of her. “A young maiden,” the image in front of her started saying in that deep voice. She wanted to run but her feet were stuck on the ground so she fell down in fright. “I’ll have my fill of you tonight.”
When she said that she wanted to be eaten by an animal, she meant an animal she could see in the zoo. An animal she’s familiar with. Not this scary-looking creature which seemed like an apparition. Maybe this is her real death. As the image started forming horns, she thought of what it might be. A demon. Maybe she’s already in hell.
A tear fell from her eyes as she stared at the ground. She’s alone and will soon be eaten by this scary yet strange unknown creature. Isn’t this what she wanted all along?
But as she felt her feet getting colder, she started thinking of a birthday party she’d have to attend. She hasn't bought a gift for her co-worker’s four-year-old child. And she insisted that Y/N would come because the kid was rather fond of her.
As the cold feeling crept up on her legs, she remembered a promise she made to one of the patrons in the coffee shop - that she’d always make his coffee. As it reached her waist, she started apologizing to her parents for being a bad daughter and wishing that they were still here with her.
She doesn’t want to die just yet. “Please,” she whispered, feeling half of her body already freezing cold. “I want to live.”
She remembered what her father would always tell her when she felt helpless in any situation, “I’m not alone. I’m not alone.” She kept on chanting.
“Lift your head.” It was a male voice. Closer than the voice from before. She doesn’t know why she was compelled to lift her head and come eye-to-eye with a young man. Big dark eyes stared at her. “Kiss me.”
What? Is he a pervert? She’s here dying in the hands of what seemed like a demon and he wants her to kiss him. “Hurry up so I can save you.”
Again, she didn’t know why she complied with his perverted request and just placed her lips on his. His hands held her cheeks as he slipped a tongue into her mouth, surprising her. Slowly, her body started feeling warm. Is it the kiss? What is happening to her body?
Y/N was breathless when the unknown man broke the kiss. He stood up and then faced the demon-looking creature. “You should be in jail, aren’t you?” The beast claimed making the young man snicker. Y/N was just confused about what was happening. Who is this man? Where did he come from? And why is her body feeling so hot as if running a fever?
In a swift motion, the human started swinging his arm, slicing the beast-like creature. There was gray smoke before another red light could be seen, illuminating the whole darkness. Y/N had to cover her eyes because of the intense light then heard a small thump beside her as the place darkened once again. The young man was lying on the ground, blood gushing on his shoulder. “Oh my God,” she exclaimed as she started panicking. “What should I do?” She should have listened to those first aid classes her dad would always ask her to go.
“Fuck me.” She froze. What? Did she hear him correctly? “Fuck me.”
There was urgency in his voice, as well as despair in his eyes. If he was a pervert, he could just push her on the ground and do what he wanted. Her body felt so hot, her insides tingling. Maybe she is the perverted one. Why is she horny? In the middle of the forest? Because of a man she just met? But he did save her life, right?
With a heavy breath, Y/N leaned in to place a kiss on his lips but his strong arms held her waist to pull her closer.
Just for this moment, she doesn’t want to feel so alone.
II. OFF THE MASK
It’s crazy. Somehow Yuta finds himself getting crazy.
And it isn't the good kind.
Her mouth was hot, saliva like a drug pulling him in. As her tongue wrestled with his, he could feel her warm fingertips against the cold skin inside his ripped sweater. Everywhere she touched felt so hot, burning. But maybe this was the desire he had missed all these years. Her lips trailed on his jaw, south to his neck. Her fingers started pulling his shirt, removing it from his body, exposing his naked torso in the open air. She kept on pressing butterfly kisses on his exposed skin, lightly sucking, earning purple marks on his skin.
He wanted to fuck her earlier, eager to regain some of his power back. But now, it feels like she needs him more than he needs her. Yuta removed her shirt and then her brassiere, throwing it to the ground. His mouth came in contact with her breasts, tongue licking her nipples which made the girl moan. Those sweet moans.
He missed this feeling. To be able to give a woman pleasure.
The girl kept on grinding her hips on his arousal. “Please, fuck me.”
And Yuta was weak.
Clothes were easily discarded on the ground. The woman’s pleas repeatedly echoed on the empty night. The sweet scent of her arousal made Yuta drunk in his own sense of arousal. “Please, I need you.” But he needs her more. She kept on riding him, her fingernails digging against his skin. A pleasurable pain. He was sure she wasn’t a virgin, evidence was the way she rolled her hips to push him deeper inside her. Yet Yuta can’t help but be too pleased with how her tight pussy could clench on his girth. His hands grabbed her breasts, rubbing her nipples earning loud mewls from her. His mouth would keep on kissing her lips and then suck the skin of her neck when he feels like she can’t breathe. She’s truly an addicting taste.
The taste of despair and hope. Yuta could easily taste those emotions in the girl in his arms. How long was it since he last felt this liberating feeling? Her melodious voice moaning for him to go deeper, her sweet scent that overwhelms his senses, her warm skin in contrast to the chilling cold, and the tight feeling of her pussy gripping his cock makes him crazy.
The moment Yuta smelled the sweet maiden’s blood, he knew something stirred inside him. Feeling her cumming for the third time, he realized what it was. She unleashed the lust demon inside him.
His inner incubus.
And an incubus needs sex, amazing sex, to regain their power. To regain their strength.
“Fuck me some more,” The girl kept on whispering in her pleasured state. Eyes almost rolling on the back of her head, lips agape. Yuta had to deliver. What kind of an incubus would he be if he left this girl wanting more? As he drilled his cock deeper into her, he started recalling the last time he had this feeling.
It’s been years. With that person.
All demons had their own sins. However, being the son of one of the greatest demons in hell, Yuta had already exhibited all sins presented to a demon even at a young age. Being an envious demon, his father was scared of the lengths his son could potentially go to. That and the fact that he made a mortal sin against humans earned him a place in the pits of hell.
For years, Yuta had been chained and caged in agony for a mistake he never wanted, he never meant to do.
A crazy demon. That was what he would hear when they talked about him. A criminal who made a grave mistake in the demon world.
And he already accepted his fate. Maybe this is just his purpose. Maybe this is what he was meant to do. Maybe this was his end.
He had lost all his hope. As well as his power.
Left in the pits of hell, bound by chains and caged.
Not until a sweet scent of blood woke him up.
Yuta kissed the maiden’s lips, tongue slipping past her mouth as he tasted all he could from her. Something about her is addicting. Invigorating.
After being locked in hell for years, Yuta didn’t know if he had the strength to fight a demon. Especially a flesh-eating one. They’re normally more powerful and with his diminishing skills, he knew he could not save this girl. Yet when her lips made contact with him, he felt recharged. More powerful.
She isn’t an ordinary girl, no doubt. If he wanted to survive the human world, he needed her. Yuta needs to recharge as much as he can.
The girl kept on panting, begging for his touch. The scent of her arousal didn’t leave his senses even if he had already felt her orgasm a few times. If possible, it only heightened. How far can this girl go? Because he could go on, even if the sun starts rising. Yet he had to remind himself that she was a mere human. He might just kill her. And with the special scent she possessed, she couldn’t bear doing that.
If he needs to survive in the human world, he’ll definitely need her.
He probably pushed her too hard that she’s now passed out on the ground. Yuta stared at the tip of his fingers. This is probably enough to sustain him for weeks. His huge black wings appeared making him smile. True, he’s a demon but he cannot just leave her alone in this place especially if she’s this special. Her scent could easily attract other demons and he cannot just risk that.
Yuta never believed in the entity opposite them. He was even startled when she announced a heavenly being’s name earlier but he decided to shrug it off. It’s not like he would disintegrate in the presence of that being. Gently placing her on the bed while she’s sleeping soundly, he might just believe that angels do exist. How can this measly human look so calm and beautiful?
This is crazy.
He had definitely gone crazy.
The man snapped his fingers as two winged figures started appearing on the foot of the bed. “Yu. Uta.” Yuta called. “I’ll leave her to the two of you. Protect her at all costs.”
“Yes, master.” The two younger devils saluted at the older one.
He held her cheeks, placing a soft kiss on her agape lips. “I’ll see you soon,” he whispered, taking one last look at her. “Y/N.”
III. SAVE YOU
“You feel amazing, Y/N.” The toned man started whispering as he was balls deep inside her. She could feel his whole length deep inside her, earning repeated screams and moans from her. “Now, cum in my cock.” He didn’t need to say it twice as she let go.
Then there’s a knock on the door.
Y/N woke up, sweating hard at the intense dream she had. Her sheets were wet with her orgasm and sweat. That was all a dream? How intense. How vivid. Another knock made her annoyed as she stood up to answer the door.
It feels weird, all of a sudden.
What is this place? This isn’t the house where she lived with her parents. Not a friend’s house. It feels foreign. Is she even in the right place? Was it a one-night stand? There was an incessant knock on the door but she surveyed the whole living room of the house where she just woke up. There are pictures of her, as well as her parents. On one side of the room was a small table with two urns and fresh flowers. Is this her place?
The knock on the door continued and she opened it to see what the commotion was about. Two kids, a boy and a girl, were staring at her with their wide round eyes. “Took you so long to answer the door,” the younger girl in a pink hoodie claimed as she entered the door. The young boy in a gray hoodie handed her a brown paper bag.
Wait, who are these kids?
“Noona, you’ll be late for your job.” The male claimed as he sat on the couch and opened the television. “We’ll take care of your place. Go to your job.”
Y/N lightly glanced at the clock and saw that she only had an hour for work.
It feels bizarre. Her feet knew where to go but her eyes were so unfamiliar with the surroundings that she felt as if she was still dreaming. Wait, is she still in a dream? The girl had to try and pinch her arm but it hurt. This must be real. Yet, she feels so weird.
“I’m glad you’re back,” her co-worker from the coffee shop claimed. She placed her bag in the cabinet and then put on her apron before checking on what she should do. The usual customers came, as well as the old man who kept on ordering drinks from her. It was a peaceful shift not until the manager came to her and tapped her shoulder, “You’re doing well. I’m glad you’re feeling better.”
The walk to her next job was a familiar one. Maybe it was the shock she had after the death of her parents that she felt weird earlier. Maybe she’s still unsure of the course of her life, that's why she’s feeling rather odd. Her co-worker from the diner had been excitedly telling her about the preparations for her daughter’s birthday party and Y/N just remembered that she doesn’t have any gift for her yet. “You should bring Yu and Uta to the party. I’m sure they would love the bubble show.” The other commented that confused her.
“Yu? Uta?”
The girl laughed as if she was joking. “Y/N, they’re the kids you usually bring here.” She cleared up and then stared at her worryingly. “Are you alright? Do you need to rest?”
She shook her head. This feels so bizarre. What the hell is happening to her?
“Maybe it’s the effect of the medicine you’re taking,” one of her co-workers from the gasoline station claimed as she shared the weird feeling creeping up on her since the early morning. “You’re still taking them right?” You blinked at that. Were you? “You need it, Y/N. That was such a traumatic event in your life.” She noted that made her nod. She doesn’t need to spell it out for her but somehow she understood it so well. “Do you want to talk to a psychiatrist I know?”
Y/N shook her head. That was the last thing on her mind - to think that she was crazy in the head.
The moment she came home, the television was still playing as the two kids slept on the couch. What are they still doing here? She lightly shook them to wake up but only the male opened his eyes, greeting her with a “Welcome home, noona”.
“What are you still doing here?” She asked, closing the television. Did they stay here the whole day? Is there food in her house? Have they eaten something? “Should I call your parents?”
The younger girl stirred in her sleep, hugging the boy. “Master is still on a trip, he won't come home just yet.” She whispered then snored. Master? What was that term? Are they slaves? What about their parents? Aren’t they worried for them?
Y/N had to give the boy a confused look, “Sorry noona.” He claimed with a toothed smile. She noticed how his teeth had little fangs on them. How adorable. “Can Uta and I stay here tonight? We won’t bother you, I promise.”
Uta? The young girl is Uta? So this young boy’s name is Yu? She cannot just leave them outside this late at night, right? She only nodded, telling them to just sleep in her room. Fortunately, she changed the sheets early that morning so the kids slept soundly on her bed. What are these two doing here? Why can’t she remember them? Is it really the medicine’s fault?
After drinking a pill, she decided to just sleep on the couch. But first, she had to check if she could make breakfast for the kids tomorrow. Although she could call child services on their parents, she doesn’t want to be the one accused of neglecting the kids. The fridge was fully stocked, which surprised her. She knew how to cook but she surely wouldn’t buy this much on grocery runs.
Is she only staying at Yu and Uta’s family house? And who are their parents?
It was pitch dark but Y/N could make up the silhouette of a man approaching her on the couch. The girl’s instinct is to shout and alert the neighbors that someone is in their home but her voice cannot come out of her lips. As the man approached, she could smell him. His muscular scent filled her nose, arousing all the system in Y/N’s body. The girl’s body felt hot as if lava started flowing in her veins instead of blood. Her nether regions felt wet. Tingly.
“Naughty, Y/N.” The man teased in his low erotic voice before leaning in close to whisper in her ear, “I can smell your arousal for me.”
“Please,” she moaned, hands reaching out for the man. “I need you.” From the darkness, she could see a smirk on his face before his hand cupped her clothed pussy and started rubbing her throbbing wetness. “Please.” One hand slipped inside her pajama pants to make contact with her clit, rubbing it with his thumb. The other hand pushed a thumb inside her mouth to prevent her from making a sound.
Y/N sucked his thumb as the man slipped his middle finger inside her core. A sound came out from her throat. “You don’t want to wake up the kids, right?” He whispered, removing his thumb from her mouth and replacing it with two fingers. Another finger slipped into her core, making her body squirm. She held the headrest of the couch, another hand clawing at the man’s arm playing with her pussy.
It feels good. So fucking good.
The man found the spot pushing her off the edge. Y/N’s toes started curling in pleasure, head lolling back that his fingers inside her mouth almost gagged her. The girl started wrapping both her hands on the man’s wrist with his fingers on her mouth. Her tongue lapped his two fingers, gently sucking. Yet, she doesn’t want anything to stop. She’s close to her orgasm. She wanted this man to give her that pleasure.
Y/N jerked her hips as if begging the man to push his fingers deeper inside her. She could feel him curling his fingers in her core, scissoring his fingers for intense pleasure. The wave of orgasm rippled against her skin, her body trembling at how intense it was.
Then she opened her eyes, panting loudly as sweat beads appeared on her forehead. What the hell? That was a dream? Why is she so horny lately? And what was that wet dream? Is she a teenager? Why is it so vivid? Why does it feel so real? And why is she so wet as if she did have an orgasm?
Because of a dream. Really?
Maybe she’s too sex-starved lately.
Y/N would always cook breakfast for the kids, even leaving lunch or small snacks for them. It had been days that the kids had become a part of her routine. She found out that they are twins but Yu, the younger boy, is the older one. A very cool kid who loves nothing but eating. Uta, the younger sister, was a very cheerful kid who hated being teased by her brother and kept on munching as if her life depended on it. They never speak anything about their family or if they go to school. They kept on playing all day, watching television, and just eating.
But one day, when she came home, with doughnuts for the kids, they were nowhere to be seen. Maybe their parents had taken them already. But they should have told her. Their parents should have thanked her for taking care of the kids.
The next day had been typical. Routinary. She just wanted to go home and rest her body. It’s been nights that she had dreamt of a man giving her intense pleasure and it’s been taking a huge toll on her. She’s tired yet she’s very aroused. She was so horny because of the dream that she feared she might just fuck the first man who will show her kindness tonight. A scary thought that made her shiver as she walked home. She should stop these thoughts. She’s walking alone for crying out loud.
A shiver ran up her spine. An eerie feeling came that someone was following her. Cautiously, she stopped to tie her shoelaces tighter. If he’s not following her, he could walk ahead of her. But the person stopped as well. He’s obviously following her. Shit, she does attract all these negative thoughts. From a closed shop window, she saw an image of a tall man but with red eyes and a long tongue slithering out of his lips.
What the hell was that?
It was a wrong turn. She didn’t know that the usual shortcut she walked to get home would be closed tonight. She was stuck in a dead end. Before she could turn back to the lighted street, a huge shadow approached her. Y/N had to walk backward to avoid the man turning her way. A smirk can be seen on his face, red eyes glaring at her. “You smell so good,” He licked his lips with his snake-like tongue. “You’ll probably taste as good.”
The man grabbed her arm, fingers digging into her flesh and creating half-moon cuts that seeped blood. “Even your blood smells so good.”
“No!” she shouted, squirming to get out of his hold. “Let me go. I’ll call the police.” A menacing laugh escaped his lips. “Please, don’t do this.” Tears started stinging her eyes in despair. No one is going to save her even if she screams, it’s so late in the night. And didn’t she just wish to be fucked earlier? Maybe this is her karma for thinking of those nasty things. “Please,” she whispered, tears springing from her eyes. “Save me.”
“Noona!” she heard someone call as she fell with a loud thud. From her tear-stained eyes, she saw Yu biting the man’s leg with his little fangs. Quickly, the man pulled his gray hoodie and threw the young kid on a nearby wall. Uta came, skin red in anger while shouting “Do not hurt my brother!” She scratched the man’s arms using her long nails but like her brother, she was immediately thrown to the ground.
A shadow appeared on the floor, lifting both the kids’ bodies. “So you were the minions?” The man asked, which made Y/N startled. Minions? And what is happening? “Where is your master? Did he abandon you, little devils?”
What? Y/N weakly stood up, her ankle hurting because of the sudden fall earlier. “Don’t hurt them.” She shouted but the two kids were just gasping for air as if they were being choked. Yet Y/N can only see their body wrapped in a shadow and floating.
The man’s red eyes stared back at her, “Let me indulge in your sweetness, human.” What the hell is happening?
Y/N tried to move back but her ankle hurt so much that she started limping. Her back could feel the wall before the man was kicked on the head from behind. She saw the shadow gone as the two kids fell down to the ground. At the speed that she could do with her sprained ankle, she walked to both of them asking them if they were alright. Both their eyes focused on the guy towering above the man who hurt them, stepping on the other’s crotch. “What is a lust demon doing here in the human world?” The man standing asked then stepped harder making the man lying on the floor grunting in pain.
“You’re also a lust demon…”
In a quick motion, the man standing leaned in to hold the lying man’s neck and carried him while choking him. “Do you really think we’re the same?” The man being choked started coughing, blood coming out of its mouth. “You hurt Yu and Uta.” He claimed, “And you have some guts thinking that you can have this girl,” Y/N furrowed her eyebrows in confusion at that statement. “She’s mine.” He growled before throwing the guy on the nearby wall.
What the hell is happening? Is this a dream? Is this a hallucination? It’s the medicine, isn’t it? Or worse, has she finally gone mad? The man swung his arm, slicing the other guy that red light started illuminating from his body.
Wait a minute, she had witnessed it before. At the forest. With the beast-looking shadow. But that was a dream.
Right?
The man turned around to face her and she blinked in fright. Both kids were behind him now, apologizing to him which startled her. Do the kids know him? Is he the master they were talking about? Then, Yu and Uta aren’t human? A hand was extended to her but she refused to take it. “What are you?” She asked in terror, voice shaking. “Please don’t hurt me.”
“After saving you, you’re begging me to not hurt you?”
“Master!” Yu shouted. “I could just erase her memory like the last time.” Erase what? Y/N stared at the young boy then at the older man standing next to him.
“No,” Y/N shouted, standing up abruptly which made her dizzy all of a sudden. “Do not touch me.” Uta stepped forward to approach her but she stopped her as well, “Even the two of you.” The young girl pouted. “What are you? What the hell are you?” She asked then covered her body with her arms, “Are you going to hurt me?” Tears fell from her eyes, “Please don’t.”
The man had a stoic look on his face before he spoke up, “Yu. Uta. You could go first.” The two kids bowed and then muttered in unison, “Yes, master.” Y/N regretted it the moment the only familiar faces were gone. But how? Where did they go? The man turned to her and she was momentarily stunned. Now that she was staring, he looked really handsome. Bright dark big eyes as if they were sparkling boba, fair skin, a high bridge nose, and red juicy lips. Why is he so attractive? Is he human?
He lent a hand, palm up, for her to take but she shook her head. “I saved your life twice, don’t you trust me enough?” So that time in the forest wasn’t a dream? And here he is, saving her once again? But why? All the questions on her mind were clouding her thoughts that she took his hand. If she wants answers, she should come to this person. He pulled her close, placing both her hands around his neck. “We’re going to fly. You’re not scared of heights, aren’t you?”
“What?” Huge dark wings appeared on his back as she scooped her in his arms. Y/N could feel the cold breeze before seeing the tops of the high-rise buildings. Was she tripping? She’s really in the air. They are flying. “Wait, wait. Don’t drop me.” She whispered in panic.
“It’s alright. It’s alright. I won’t let you fall.” he whispered in a calm voice. “You asked what I am and I’m just showing it to you.”
The girl wrapped her arms around his neck tight, eyes focused on the black wings moving across the wind. “Are you an angel?”
A hearty laugh escaped the man’s lips that startled Y/N. He’s truly handsome. She shouldn’t have doubted those religious folks when they stated that angels look very heavenly. “Quite the contrary.” He’s not an angel? But he saved her twice. Contrary? Then a demon?
“Why me?” She whispered just as a realization came. “Are you here to kill me and bring me to hell?”
The man’s feet landed on the balcony of her house, large wings disappearing almost immediately. He gently put her down, making sure that she could stand although her ankle was sprained very badly. “Because from now on, you’re mine.” Her eyes widened in surprise. She heard the same words earlier but it clearly didn’t mean anything earlier.
Right?
“I’ll save you, no matter if I live or die, Y/N.”
IV. BAD EUPHORIA
This shouldn’t happen.
Maybe Yuta had really become crazy. He should have learned from his past mistakes. This would only bring him back to the same place where he was before. Maybe it was better that he rot in person instead of this creeping feeling inside him.
“Your little sunglasses are so cute, Yu.” Y/N complimented, making the little devil smile coolly. The twins should know that showing your demon self to a human is illegal. But what does he know? He even flew her in the air. Besides, they are demons. Evil creatures. They're meant to break the rules. “These little pigtails are so adorable, Uta.” She squealed, making the younger girl giggle.
She should be scared of them. They could hurt her now that she knows a lot. Why did Yuta have to promise those things to her? He should have killed her the first time instead of keeping her even if she tasted so sweet. Even if she smelled so good. How pathetic of him.
“So these are your demon forms?” The twins nodded, flying around her with their little wings. “And you have specific powers?”
Yu nodded, “I can erase memories.”
“And I can heal anything.” Uta continued, sounding proud of herself. The girl glanced at the healed wound on her arm and then her ankle. “It’s pretty cool, isn’t it?”
The girl had to scrunch her nose, nodding at the younger girl. Yuta squinted his eyes at that. What was that? Is she showing affection to the demons? How weird. And why are the twins liking her attention so much? He shouldn’t have left them with her. “And that man is your…” She squinted her eyes before continuing, “Father?”
Yuta glared at the younger boy who chuckled nervously. He shouldn’t have taken the twins in his care. But what could he do if this was the only thing he could do seeing two wide-eyed kids entering the demon world? Besides, Yu and Uta had been great entertainment and companions to him when he was still chained back there. Now that they have the taste of the human world, he probably cannot bring those two back to hell. Even he, an older demon, doesn’t want to return to that place.
“Mister,” she called, which made Yuta look at Y/N. “Are you planning to kick me out of your house?”
“And where would you go?” The girl shrugged, “Didn’t I tell you that I should always see you? The demons had shown a liking to your scent.” Y/N rolled her eyes which annoyed Yuta. He did explain earlier that the smell of her blood had awakened some demons from hell and now, they’re roaming the human world just to look for her. If she wanted to stay alive, he should keep a close eye on her. It was a simple concept yet she had a hard time grasping that fact. How stupid. Humans are so stupid.
“And master needs you to regain his power,” Uta claimed in a high-pitched voice that made Yuta surprised. Why would she say that? Yu stopped his sister and seeing the glare Yuta had given them, the two little devils disappeared. This is getting really annoying.
“You need me to regain your power?” Yuta stood up from his chair and then shook his head, walking to the fridge and taking a bottle of water. “Do you want me to do something to help you regain your power?” He had to grasp the bottle rather tightly.
Is she seriously asking that question?
Maybe Yu’s powers had evolved so much that she doesn’t remember what they did in the forest. Yuta smiled, he knew that kid would do wonders in the future. “Mister,” she called once again that made him hiss, “Should I do…” When he turned around to face her, she was standing behind him. Her scent is stronger now that she’s closer. Yuta could easily hold her by the waist and kiss her. “...something for you?” She asked in a soft voice, eyes staring at his lips.
This is fucking dangerous. He might just hurt her again and the twins aren’t here to erase her memory or heal her. Yuta leaned in, “I’m not interested in the well-behaved you, baby.” The girl puffed her cheeks, squinting her eyes at him.
“I’m not flirting with you, stupid.” Yuta chuckled as she stomped off inside the room, closing the door with a loud thud.
How cute.
Even if he was lying on the couch and she was sleeping in the room, with the door locked shut, Yuta could smell the scent of her arousal. It was way stronger than earlier that bothered him. If this continues on, another demon could smell her and this will be trouble once again. This was his fault. She did awaken something inside him but he didn't need to awaken her sexual desires.
He should have stopped that night in the forest.
Like the other nights, he approached her in her own wet dream. A mirage that only he can create. She was squirming in bed, panting hard while sweating. Her shirt was pushed up to reveal her breasts. A wet spot was visible on the material of her shorts.
Yuta clenched his fist tight. He cannot do this to her once again. And if this continues, he might just make the same mistake he made. He shook his head, he wouldn’t do it to her.
“Please,” she whispered, heavy breaths coming out of her agape lips. But he’s a demon and there are only some temptations that he can resist. Obviously one of them isn't her. Even if her eyes were closed, tears were streaming down her face. She might be in pain. And who is he to deny her the cure she needed? “Please, fuck me.”
He held her cheek. “Ssh, my angel.” He mumbled as if she could hear him. “I’ll make you feel real good, hmm?” Yuta didn’t waste time to pull down her shorts, revealing her sopping cunt. She smelled so divine, so erotic. He could feel his body getting energized just from smelling her. How perverted can he actually get? Truly, a lust demon.
He leaned down to give a quick kiss on her pubic bone, a moan escaping her lips. All his inhibitions are gone. The self-control he had been keeping to himself was gone when his lips came in contact with her clit. Her addicting taste in his lips only made him want her more. He slipped his tongue inside her core, the taste of her arousal making him dizzy in lust. Her body kept on moving so Yuta had to hold both her legs, parting them, to have easier access.
Y/N’s moans filled the room, echoing through the walls, which only heightened his want to pleasure this girl. By now, Yuta knows her pleasure spots. The exact spot in her core that makes her let go. With the tip of his tongue, he started hitting that spot earning muffled cries from her. She’s close, he could feel it. Yuta’s tongue kept on abusing her pussy, making sure that he could explore every inch of her.
And it was the most rewarding feeling when she released everything. Yuta made sure to lap everything that she could release, not missing a single drop of her sweetness.
The guy sat on the foot of the bed, just watching her calm sleeping face. She’s very beautiful. And Yuta knew that he couldn’t fall with these beautiful things. That would be his literal downfall for sure. Yet he had felt like he had become a possessive man, not wanting to share her with anyone. He should start putting scent blockers on her so a demon wouldn’t chase after her.
But putting scent blockers on her meant being a prisoner in her chains. A mistake he had made a long time ago and regretted big time.
He shouldn’t make the same mistake twice.
“They said bittersweet is life but it’s not that sweet, honestly it’s bitter.,” Yuta claimed, holding his cup of coffee. “Like this coffee.”
The girl rolled her eyes in annoyance. “Why can’t you just ask for cream and sugar like a normal person?” She asked, putting down the jar of cream and sugar above the table with a loud sound.
“Because master is not a normal person,” Yu claimed, drinking his chocolate milkshake.
Uta was munching on her waffles when she said in a mouth filled with food, “Shouldn’t we call him dad now?” The girl giggled, wiping the younger girl’s mouth. To avoid some questions, Y/N forced him to introduce himself as Yu and Uta’s dad. Surprisingly, her co-workers believed that lie. Yuta shook his head, humans truly are gullible. “Can I order some more waffles?”
Y/N smiled. “Of course, baby girl.” She claimed while rubbing the younger girl’s cheek. “Do you want anything else, Yu?” She asked softly as the younger boy asked for the same meal as his sister. “And you?” she faced Yuta with an uninterested look that annoyed him. Where is her happy caring tone? Why is she so cold when facing him?
“Nothing else.” She rolled her eyes before leaving to the counter where her co-workers were looking at her and then at him with wide smiles on their faces. Yuta didn’t know what they were talking about but she made a disgusted face while shaking her head after looking at him.
How adorable.
Maybe it was her time of the month. But Yuta shrugged it off, she wasn’t bleeding when he ate her out last night. Did it start today perhaps? But she clearly showed her distaste at him. Is that normal? A normal female reaction, perhaps?
Even at the diner, she kept on rolling her eyes at him while showing great gentleness to the two kids. Once again, she introduced him to her co-workers as the twins’ dad and he even earned an invite to a child’s birthday party. Yu and Uta both had a blast with their non-stop eating, making the older demon amused. They surely are gluttonous demons.
Y/N was just pacing around doing her job, making Yuta watch her every move. She would smile at every customer, making sure to give them her utmost service. Now he understood it when Yu reported that she’s hardworking. A male co-worker called for her and she obediently walked to where he was. He showed her a spoon with something white and the girl immediately parted her lips to taste what was on the spoon. She nodded, making the man smile warmly at her. He swiped a thumb on her bottom lip before licking the cream on his finger which made her giggle.
What the hell was that? Is she flirting with that co-worker? A boyfriend? But the twins never mentioned a male companion in their reports. Who the hell was that?
The girl was busy serving on the tables when a young kid wearing roller skates started zooming in the middle of the diner. He zoomed past Y/N who almost fell if not for Yuta holding her waist and pulling her to sit on his lap. “Are you alright?” He realized how near she was now that she was seated on his lap and it didn’t help that he was feeling something cold seeping on his shirt.
“Oh shit,” she cursed, standing up immediately and then wiping the dark liquid with a towel. She stopped when she felt his abdomen before staring at his face with a lot of surprise in her eyes. Y/N cleared her throat before heading south to wipe his leg. Slowly, Yuta could start smelling her sweet scent. She’s getting aroused. And maybe it was because she was too close that his senses were so stimulated, he wanted to reach out to her and fuck her mercilessly in this diner.
Her co-worker muttered an 'Oh My God' at the mess that happened as Y/N apologized. She was instructed to bring Yuta to the staff room since there was an extra change of clothes that he could wear, even volunteering to look after the twins as they finished their meal. She should have declined. Doesn’t she know that he and her inside a confined space is dangerous? And with his evil dirty thoughts and her emanating sweet scent, he could just lose himself.
Yuta was right. The staff room was located at a somehow secluded part of the diner and too small to stop his raging dirty thoughts. He quickly removed the shirt that was getting slowly drenched with the cola as the girl reached for the extra clothes on the upper cabinet. When she turned around, her eyes just widened while staring straight at his naked torso. The scent was now heightened along with her biting her bottom lip. With a heavy breath, she handed the shirt and then turned around, reaching down to look for drawers on the bottom layer. The simple action created a small contact between their bodies, making Yuta hiss.
“Y/N, you could just ask.” The girl turned to her in confusion. Yuta stepped forward and she stepped back, “I can smell your arousal.”
“What?” Her eyes widened in surprise which made Yuta smirk. She’s like a deer caught in headlights. “I’m not…”
Yuta moved another step forward that their bodies were almost touching. He grabbed her wrist, placing her hand on his torso. Her cold fingers trailed to his chest down to his abdomen. “You’re probably lacking excitement, right?” Her fingers moved to the waistband of his jeans then back to his abdomen. “Do you already know the ending, Y/N?” Yuta whispered in her ear. A heavy breath as he takes in her lovely aroused scent. He guided her hand to the front of his jeans, “A little teaser.”
The girl pulled him closer, placing her lips on his. It was an invigorating feeling, a sign that he should stop himself and just let go. “Mister…” she called in her erotic voice.
“Yuta,” he immediately corrected. “Call me Yuta.”
“Yuta.” The name came off as a whimper, a sexy moan that he wanted to repeat. “Yuta, please.”
He didn’t care if the name wasn’t his anymore, as long as it kept coming out of her lips. Yuta turned her around, pulling her waist closer to him as she hiked her skirt up. “Yes, baby. I only want my name coming out of your lips.”
“Yuta.” Fuck. This is bad. But why is he so elated? How could something this fucking good be considered bad? “Yuta,” Y/N called once again which made Yuta hiss.
This will surely be his downfall.
V. PRISONER
Y/N felt as if she had done something morally and ethically wrong.
Maybe she’s a criminal who deserves to be in jail. A prisoner.
She couldn’t even look at her co-workers the moment she left the staff room. She can’t even look at both Yu and Uta even if she knew that Yuta isn’t their father. Even looking at Yuta’s eyes was very difficult for her and it’s not like his cock didn’t keep ramming on her earlier.
His cold hand was grabbing her breast, pinching her nipples using his fingers. The other hand kept rubbing her clit as he kept thrusting into her from behind. His breathing was warm against her ear as she could hear him panting, gently moaning in his low voice. It was so hot.
All the horny nights were easily forgotten because of this quick sexual session. And with what she considers a stranger whom she just found out his name? How is she suddenly so reckless and rebellious?
Y/N started fixing her skirt but Yuta wrapped his arms around her from behind, fixing the buttons of her blouse. “Skip your gasoline gig,” he whispered, which made her confused. What? “I’m going to ask the twins to leave so we can continue this at home. I’ll wait for you.”
What the hell?
How could Y/N find a horny guy who gives amazing pleasure? As she was walking home, she started realizing why. He did claim that he’s a lust demon, an incubus. That means it was his sin, right? So he must be really a horny demon. But what else can he do during sex? Does he have an intense stamina that could kill her? Can he shapeshift? Maybe grow a tentacles or grow his cock bigger? She lightly giggled at the thought. Why is she getting excited all of a sudden? This is dangerous. She’s getting very wet at the thought.
Before she could put the key to the doorknob, the door opened. She expected Yu to greet her and Uta, being the cooler among the twins, would just be munching something while staring at the television. But to her surprise, Yuta opened the door without any clothes on. Immediately, she came in the door and closed it behind her. “Are you crazy?” She asked, “What if the neighbors see you?”
“I could smell you coming.”
He pulled the girl closer, letting her fingers trail on his broad shoulder. “And the kids?”
Yuta placed a wet kiss on her neck, “I sent them far away to do something.” The girl giggled which was replaced by a small squeal when the man scooped her up in his arms. “I hope you’re ready for me.” Y/N grinned. She’s more than ready for him.
He took his time kissing her lips, tongue slipping past her lips and into her mouth. Y/N could only moan at that. His tongue game was so amazing that she could easily imagine herself in an intense orgasm if he eats her out. His fingers slowly undo the button of her blouse, kissing the skin getting exposed. Losing her patience, she discarded her bra while he left supple kiss marks on her abdomen.
Yuta’s lips were quickly on her exposed breast, kissing the underside before sucking the nipple. His tongue played with the little nub as his fingers rubbed the other. Thread of curses and moans kept coming out of her lips. “Oh My God, Yuta.” She could feel him chuckling at that.
Y/N had to grab his hair, raising his head to look at her. “Please, put it inside me.” He gave her a smile. A warm smile that made her swoon. God, he is so attractive. She might just orgasm if she keeps staring at him.
Yuta pushed up her skirt and pulled down her underwear. Licking his lips at the sight of her wetness. He held his cock, lightly rubbing the tip on her pussy lips that made Y/N raise her hip. The guy’s chuckle can be heard before he pushes himself into her. The girl screamed, fingers digging into Yuta’s back at how big he was. Fuck, he’s filling her up. And when Yuta placed a pillow under her hips, she could see the outline of his cock on her abdomen.
It was a surreal feeling. It felt foreign yet familiar at the same time. Maybe Y/N is getting crazy. Too cock crazy. She had never had a cock this good. And she knew it would be hard to find another, specifically a human, who would fuck her up this good. His thrusts were hard, deep, and rhythmic at a pace that made her lose her mind. She can even feel his balls hitting her ass cheeks. Yuta is too good at this. It’s making her crazy.
She had never cummed that much in her life. Even her vivid dreams weren’t as good as the real thing. The sheets were wet because of her sweat and juice but she refused to move, her body feeling so sore from the intense sex she just received.
That was really amazing. He’s undoubtedly a lust demon.
But how real are demons? Isn’t that just something that the religious people made up to distinguish good from evil? And how evil could they be?
“Yuta,” she called while lying next to him in bed. Y/N knew that she shouldn’t be doing this pillow talk with him but they’re not even cuddling. It’s just pure lust between them, no strings attached. Yet she needed some answers. The man hummed, facing to look at her. She rolled on her stomach, “You said I’ll be in danger if I disappear from your sight because the demons will come for me, right?” The man nonchalantly nodded. “Is there any way to stop that?”
She could feel Yuta stiffen at that question. Did he not expect that? But that isn’t the normal conversation one has after intense sex. From his reaction, she gathered that there must be something that could stop this. “What is it?” she asked, gently rising from the bed to fully look at him. “Can I do something?”
“A contract.” She raised an eyebrow at that. What contract? “A binding contract between a demon and human.” Y/N sat up to signal that she was interested which made Yuta hiss in annoyance. “You should understand that the contract would chain us to each other. So no, Y/N.”
“What?” The girl asked in confusion. “But it was you who brought the contract up and it doesn’t seem that hard.”
Y/N rolled her eyes at his lack of response. “Besides, I’m not that possessive. Even if we’re chained to each other, I’ll still let you wander alone.” Yuta visibly stiffened at those words that confused her. Maybe it was a touchy subject for him. She should probably stop.
“I don’t trust your words,” Yuta whispered.
Y/N huffed at that. “I’m not a perfect person but I’m also not an evil person. Why don’t you believe me?” She revolted. “Why don’t you want to do the binding contract with me? Tell me what is wrong with me?”
Yuta had to roll over to face her body, parting her legs that confused her. “Nothing, Y/N,” he claimed before placing a soft kiss on her pussy lips. “But I won’t do it with you.”
The girl had to cover her mouth to prevent the scream coming out of her lips when he pushed a tongue between her moist pussy folds. The neighbors had already obviously heard her voice, they didn't need to know that they weren’t done with the sexual action yet. “Yuta,” she moaned. “Have you ever been in a contract with someone before?” He only answered with a flick of the tongue in her most sensitive spot.
“You’re a poison, Yuta. I shouldn’t have trusted you.” The female voice shouted, making the demon’s heart bleed. “For my last wish, let me go."
"Let me leave this world.”
He shouldn’t have trusted her words. He shouldn’t have believed that she wasn’t an evil person. What has she done to her?
A binding contract has its pros and cons. True, he can save the person he cares for. But a loose chain is still a chain. And chains tend to hurt in the long run. A terribly twisted love’s prison.
“Twins?” Yuta called, towering above two little cages to look for both Yu and Uta. It confused him that they weren't here. This is the only place they could go. A safe place for his little devils. Not too hot and not too cold for their comfort.
He had always thought that hell was always so burning hot, tormenting people who came here. Evil people. He had always stayed here all his life so he wouldn’t know the difference.
The only coldness in this scorching world was the cage he was locked in for years. The cuffs were stone cold against his skin, exhausting all his energy. As he brushed his fingers on the steel bars, he smiled to himself.
He remembered tiring himself the first few months. “I’m not a criminal!” he shouted. “Set me free!” A statement he knew wasn’t true. He is a criminal and he deserves to be in this prison, bound with chains. He is a dangerous man.
And he might be doing it again.
He started walking some more, spotting the two winged little devils with someone very familiar. He wished he would never bump into him again. Hell is a huge place for the two of them to see each other. But as he called for the twins’ attention, he turned to him as well. Uta called him ‘Dad’ while running to grab his arm in fright. It’s been years and the twins have grown up yet they exhibit the same terrifying expression when faced by him.
“Dad?” He repeated in his booming voice, looking in confusion at the man who only raised an eyebrow. Yu muttered an apology, pulling his sister behind Yuta. “You’re playing house in the human world? You should have known better.”
Yuta had to turn around, “Let’s go, kids.” He mumbled before stopping at what the old man said,
“Don’t kill another human again, Yuta.”
VI. GOODBYE
“Let me go!” Yuta kept shouting which made Y/N look at him in surprise. His eyes were closed shut, sweat beads forming on his eyebrows. Was he dreaming? “Let me go!”
The girl had to shake him aggressively to wake him up from his deep sleep. “Yuta, are you alright?” She asked once assured that he had regained consciousness. Y/N started wiping his forehead with the blanket to dry off his sweat. “You’re having a bad dream.”
But Y/N was startled when he pulled her closer, hugging her body. His breathing was harsh against her skin, tightly holding onto her with shaking fingers. He might be scared. But what was the dream about? Why does he keep shouting to let him go? The girl threaded her fingers on his hair, hushing him up. Her other hand rubbed his back in a calming manner.
She was relieved that he got calmer over the simple action.
But what is wrong with him?
Even in the morning, he was just quietly staring at the two kids who were huddled on the table while watching a caterpillar they got outside. “It looks ugly,” Uta claimed, which made the older girl laugh, handing them the small container filled with twigs and leaves where they could keep the caterpillar. “It looks like Yu’s horns.”
The older boy glared at his sister. “But when a caterpillar grows up, it will be a very pretty butterfly.” The older girl explained, picking up the caterpillar and placing it inside the container.
“Will it grow wings?” Y/N nodded at the younger girl. “Like our wings?”
Yu shook his head, “Different wings. Prettier than yours.” Uta pouted with a huff, making the older laugh at her cuteness. Her eyes gazed at Yuta who was just looking at them with a stoic face. Was he not amused at how cute Yu and Uta are? Or was it because of his dream earlier? Should she ask about it?
Since it was her day off and she needed to buy a gift for her co-worker’s daughter, she asked the three to come with her to the mall. She had gotten her pay the day before and could buy something for the three of them. Maybe a new sunglass for Yu, a pretty ribbon for Uta, and a tank top for Yuta. He had been wearing sleeved shirts lately and she was annoyed, she loved seeing his exposed arms around the house. Those thick arms that she loved to claw on. Y/N stared at his arms before gazing at his face. To her surprise, Yuta had been looking straight at her.
Oh shit. The arousal. He could smell her.
In the end, Y/N cannot force Yuta to come out and the kids promise the older man that they’ll behave in the mall. She was giggling to himself at how he looked like a dad scolding his kids. Yu and Uta are so hyperactive outside that she’s already tired the moment they step foot inside the mall. The two kept on buying different kinds of stuff: shirts, shoes, and dresses. Luckily, Yuta had given her a card to spend on the kids.
Where did he get all the money? But then Yu was the one who explained that Yuta was the son of a higher demon, like an heir in a human world. So when the three decided to stay in the human world, his assets in hell became assets in the human world. “So Yuta is rich?” She innocently asked.
“Super rich,” Uta claimed, biting on her fried chicken.
Y/N was astounded at that fact. He’s handsome and he’s rich? She cannot deny that he’s also hot and so great in bed. “Is he still single?” The question came out before she could even process it in her mind. That was so wrong to ask. But she’s so curious. Yu gave her a knowing smile but she shook her head, wanting to tell him that what he was thinking was wrong. But that would be so defensive of her.
“The first time we met Master Yuta, he was heartbroken from his first love.” Uta shared. Y/N’s ears perked up at that. First love? “He was caged by his father for killing that person.” She gasped in surprise. Maybe that’s why he was saying those words in his dream. But Yuta killed his first love?
Yu hissed at his sister for talking too much. “But master claims that it wasn’t his doing.” He shared calmly, “Killing a human is a grave sin in hell and the other demons believe that Master is the only one who could do it.”
That was heartbreaking. But Y/N doesn’t know Yuta enough to judge him. She saw him kill twice but those were all demons and he promised that he’d save her, even if he lived or died. Surely, Yuta cannot kill a human. Especially a person he once loved. “Yu, can you erase his memory of his first love?” The younger boy shook his head, claiming that he could not erase a demon’s memory.
Y/N nodded. If Yu or Uta cannot, then she should help him. But how could she do that? How could she stop the nightmares when he obviously can’t move on from his life in hell? How could one measly human help a somewhat higher demon? “Do you think I could do something to help him?”
Uta nodded but Yu glared at her. At her prodding, the younger girl answered. “Help him regain his powers so he can turn back time. That was his goal.”
“Regain his powers?” They did mention it before. “How can I help regain his powers?” The two kids shrugged, busy eating their meal. Should she ask Yuta instead? Is it a demon thing? “Then, how do the two of you regain your powers?”
“Eating,” they muttered in unison which made her smile. Obviously. Yuta calls them gluttonous demons so maybe that’s why. Should she cook for Yuta to regain his power?
Y/N had to cover her mouth at the sudden realization. Yuta is a lust demon. He cannot regain power just by a simple meal. He needed sex.
She shook her head to divert her attention as Uta looked at her in worry. “Then how did the two of you end up in the demon world?”
The girl dropped her fork and she wanted to quickly apologize for asking something so insensitive. “We both light our house on fire, killing us and our family.” That’s so familiar and tragic. “Master explained that we killed ourselves, that's why we’re in hell, a grave sin like his.” Yu continued.
Y/N held the top of Uta’s head. “I think the two of you are great kids.” She claimed then smiled at the younger girl. “If ever I get married and have kids, I hope they’re as lovely and clever as the two of you.” She continued, even staring at Yu who looked shy at what she was saying. “I bet your parents are very proud of the two of you.”
“Your parents are also proud of you, unnie,” Uta claimed, which confused her. “We met them in the demon world.”
“We’re home!” Uta shouted, bursting to the door and then showing off her pink glittery bow. Yu helped put down the paper bags on the couch as Y/N went straight to the kitchen while chuckling at the younger girl’s cute antics. Yu showed his new sunglasses making Yuta hiss. They spend all his money on these useless things? They’re such kids.
Yuta carefully glanced at the different paper bags full of fabric and accessories. “Did you say thank you to Y/N?” The two kids nodded while taking out toys from one paper bag. He shook his head, such kids. The guy had to bite his bottom lip, smelling a very familiar scent coming from the kitchen. What is she doing?
Y/N was standing by the stove as he wrapped his arms around her waist, “Smells good.”
“I’m heating the pasta we bought…”
“I meant you,” His hand that was resting on her stomach trailed to her breast, grabbing one boob from the material of her blouse. “Why are you so aroused? I can smell you.” He pulled her closer, kissing the side of her neck.
Small giggles came out of her lips, “I’m not the only aroused one.” She teased before rubbing her ass on his bulge. Yuta laughed at that action. Y/N turned around to face him after turning off the stove. “Do you want to try something new, Yuta?”
Something new? His eyebrow raised at that. The girl started tying her tail to a ponytail, licking her lips in the process. Yuta lightly chuckled when she started kneeling on the floor. A blowjob? Did someone replace Y/N in the store? What is happening to her? Her fingers were undoing the zipper of his pants when he claimed, “Right now? With the kids outside?”
The girl grinned. “Look at you being a dad,” she teased before gazing at him with lust-hooded eyes. “Daddy.”
“Yu! Uta!” Yuta shouted. “Could the two of you deliver a message?”
If Yuta thought hell was full of chaos, the demons should attend a kid’s birthday party. Kids were all running, high-pitched squeals and laugh echoed throughout the whole venue. It's utterly chaos.
All the moms were staring at him, whispering things to other moms. He doesn’t know what it was but he had been called a lot of distasteful names before so their words wouldn’t have to bother him. But when they started talking to Y/N, laughing with her while pointing at him, Yuta felt curious. It was like they were watching his every move and for them to not suspect something, he was attentive to the twins. They kept on running around, playing with the human kids as if they weren’t demons. They looked so fascinated at the clown’s magic tricks and when the bubble show came, they kept squealing in delight.
Yuta had to smile at that. At least they had the experience of being kids in the human world. “He’s so attractive,” he overheard one of the moms say to her husband. He remembered her as one of Y/N’s co-workers in the diner. Was she talking about him? “He takes care of his kids so well.” Wait, was he doing too much? “No wonder Y/N looks so happy lately.”
His gaze fell on the girl seated on the floor and taking pictures of the twins inside the huge bubble. “They already look like a small family.” Yuta smiled. That wasn’t a bad thought.
After the bubble show, came desserts. Yu was careful about eating too much but Uta kept on coming the second time to the cake table, even taking a huge piece. “You should stop, Uta.” Yuta reprimanded, making the young girl pout. “Your dress will pop off if you eat another bite.” Y/N had to take the discarded plate filled with cake and hand it to the younger girl who went running to her brother. “Y/N!”
“You cannot stop a girl from eating, Yuta.” She claimed, “Besides, Uta is still cute even if she eats too much.”
“She’s my daughter.” A gasp can be heard nearby from a mom overhearing their conversation.
The girl rolled her eyes at that. “I know. But that is my baby girl,” Yuta smirked. That’s her revolt? “You cannot tell my baby what she can’t or can eat.” She claimed before taking another slice of cake, “Even Yu.” She claimed before feeding him a piece of cake and walking away.
Yuta could only laugh in disbelief, wiping his lips to remove the icing. Are they playing bad cop, good cop now? Yeah, he’ll be the bad parent. He’s a demon, for crying out loud. That’s his nature. And obviously, that is exactly the reason why Yu and Uta like her so much. She's always the good parent. Spoiling them with everything.
The two of them as parents? Yuta timidly smiled at the thought before shaking his head. What the heck is this light, mushy feeling creeping into his body? “She makes you weak?” The mom eavesdropping on them asked that confused Yuta. “You shouldn’t let go of a girl that loves your children like that.” She had a knowing smile on her face as she stared at Y/N talking to the two kids while eating cake. “You should never let Y/N go.”
Yuta shouldn’t. Even if he had encountered these things before, he knew Y/N had shown him a very different feeling. He had always thought hell was the hottest place in existence but why does he feel warmer in her arms? And these mushy feelings? Why would his heart beat so much whenever he sees Y/N smile? She makes him weak and strong at the same time. It’s crazy.
Yuta might be crazy.
Has he finally moved on? Is this not a mistake if he pursued it further? Should he ask her once again to have a binding contract with her? Because right now, he’s sure that he would be willing and more than happy to be chained to her if it meant staying with her.
“Oh, the father of the birthday girl is here!” The clown claimed making all the kids look at the man coming into the party venue carrying a huge dollhouse.
The sound of broken plates echoed throughout the place but Yuta’s gaze didn’t leave the man who was now looking at him, as well as all the guests. Y/N was quick to stand up, looking at him with worry but the other man was quicker on his feet to land a punch on Yuta’s face. “You!” he shouted, face filled with rage. “I’m going to kill you, motherfucker!”
Yuta didn’t make a move and let the man take blows on his face. Anything to ease his anger. He could feel some people stopping the man repeatedly punching him and kids crying at how scary the scene was. Some mothers also gasped calling for Y/N’s name and from his bleeding eye, Yuta saw Y/N seated on top of the broken plates he had created.
Once again, Yuta reminded himself that this will be a huge mistake. He really shouldn’t pursue this much longer.
Yuta kept on hissing as Y/N put medicine on the cuts on his face. Since Uta cannot heal him, he let the older girl tend to his wounds. He cannot go to the hospital. He doesn’t really deserve it. The man should have killed him and he would easily let him.
An eye for an eye. A tooth for a tooth. A life for a life.
He lightly glanced at Y/N’s palm, “Aren’t you hurt as well?”
She lightly glanced at the faint white lines across her palm. “Uta did her best to heal me and Yu had to erase everyone’s memory.” She shared in a soft voice, “They said they’ll go back to hell to rest for a while.” Yuta nodded. He could also do that. “Was he related to your first love?”
Yuta had to look her straight in the eye. How did she know that? “The twins told you?”
“I asked them. So please don’t be mad at them.” He hissed, closing his eyes at that. “Did you really kill her?” The way she said those words was so calculated, so quiet. As if she was scared. Of him? Of the fact that he killed someone? He wasn’t entirely sure.
“I did.” The shift in her eyes broke Yuta. “That was her final wish, to leave the world.”
She stared at him in confusion. How much did the twins tell her? “Final wish?”
“From the binding contract,” he started. “She was my human and I’m bound to her.” Even saying those words felt like thorns digging into Yuta’s heart. “I became too obsessed with her, too possessive, that she grew mad.”
“Her last wish was to end her life and I have to make it happen as her demon.”
Y/N’s eyes softened at that. Now that she heard it straight from Yuta, she realized that it wasn't all that bad. He had to do what he promised to do. Is this the reason why he was locked in hell? The grave sin he committed to the demon world?
He’s just a man who fell in love. That’s the risk someone has to take whenever they fall in love. Ain’t no joy, ain’t no torment.
His dark brown eyes bore through hers, making her hitch a breath. “And I’m almost making the same mistake the second time.”
Her eyes widened at those words. She was thinking the same thing as he was thinking right? “Then Yuta, let’s do the binding contract…”
“No, Y/N.”
It was a strong no. But Y/N isn’t even disheartened. She could always ask him again and maybe he could crack and say yes. There’s always a flaw in every contract and she just needed to look for it so she could help Yuta be free from the memory of his first love. So he wouldn’t have a chance to make the same mistake to her.
She stretched her arms seeing the two kids snoring on both sides of the bed. When she glanced at the far end, Yuta was nowhere in sight. The house sounds so quiet. Was he away? Maybe he came back to their world. It had been an exhausting feat for him, she completely understood why he would go out. Maybe she should cook for the kids and regain their powers. Maybe she should think of horny thoughts so Yuta could come back quickly.
As she stepped outside the room, she saw a piece of paper on top of the table. That’s odd. Yuta doesn’t leave notes when he’s going out. But as she read the letters scribbled on the paper, her tears fell from her eyes. She had to read the same sentences repeatedly for it to make sense.
I didn’t know I would feel this way again.
It’s because I love you that I say this,
Eternally, goodbye.
Yuta didn’t just go out. He already left.
VII. BUTTERFLY
It must be a dream.
A crazy dream.
She didn’t even know what reality was from a dream. As she stared at the cocoon inside the container, she wanted to believe that everything was real - that she met two adorable kids, Yu and Uta. Yet whenever she would share that fact with her co-workers, they would just make her crazy by claiming that they had never seen her with two kids before. Even at the party, she was alone and nothing scandalous happened.
Then, they might not be real.
It must be the medicine making her crazy like this. Should she stop taking it? Should she continue taking it? But as she tried to swallow one pill, she felt something kicking in her stomach.
It’s been days, turned into weeks that this strange phenomenon happened to her. Something kept on kicking inside her, giving sharp pain to her abdomen. Some of her female co-workers told her to get it checked but her male co-workers beg to differ. “You’ve been non-stop talking about twins and something is in your stomach,” they would narrate, “Maybe you’re pregnant, Y/N.”
That isn’t plausible. The female doctor asked her the last time she had some sexual activity and she just didn’t know what to say. Are all those vivid horny dreams real? Was that gorgeous demon named Yuta even real? She ruled out the idea of her being pregnant and suggested eating full healthy meals and to stop stressing herself out.
Maybe that was it. She can’t possibly be pregnant. That would be crazy.
But then, everything in her life had gone crazy.
Cold seasons meant Christmas was coming soon. She quit her gasoline station gig, mainly because of her co-worker's worried advice that she lives alone and being outside late at night would be very dangerous for her. On her days off, a friend from the said gasoline gig would always ask her to come out at Christmas fairs and just buy gifts and trinkets. Y/N would always pout, there was no one she could give gifts to except her co-workers who had everything they needed.
At one stall, her eyes focused on gray sunglasses with sparkling stones on the frame. Uta would really love that. On another stall selling ponytails, she saw a pastel pink that would look really good on Uta’s twin pigtails. Then there are different colored female tank tops that would look so sexy on Yuta’s body.
A small chuckle escaped her lips.
She’s indeed a crazy woman.
As she was walking around, she spotted a picture of a horned creature on one of the tents. Demons should look like that, right? Not cute, not lovable, not handsome. Maybe she had really gone mad thinking that she had met demons. The tent had different colored trinkets, fairy lights illuminated the outline of the small slit of an entrance. On the side says ‘Psychic’ which made her smile. Who would even believe in these things? The woman inside spotted her and welcomed her with a smile on her face. “How are you, Y/N?” The girl’s eyes widened in surprise. How did she know her name? “Were you living alright? Do you honestly think everything is just a dream?”
Maybe it was her strategy but how did she find out her name? She only gave the girl a warm smile as she sat down in front of her, “I should be careful with my words or they would come after me.” She started that confused her. What? The psychic, a middle-aged woman, started telling her about her life, That she was adopted after her birth mother died while giving birth to her. That she lived a mostly lavish life but gambling ended everything. Y/N’s mind was mind-blown. How does she know so much? “Your parents are great people, my dear child.”
“My parents?”
“I know you blame them for their death but it was inevitable. It doesn’t mean that they didn’t love you. They said goodbye because they love you so much.” The older woman smiled, “Even that man.”
It’s because I love you that I say this, eternally, goodbye.
The wonder was laced with confusion at her words. How did she know so much about her life? Is she being her crazy self again? “Be careful of wings, dear Y/N.” Wings? “This will bring you to those looking after you.”
Instead of clarity, she only got confusion. Why did she even enter that tent? Who the hell would even believe a so-called psychic who kept on spouting nonsense? Only a crazy person would.
And she’s a crazy person.
Some of her co-workers invited her for their family Christmas party but Y/N remained at home, watching television and eating leftover pizza. She kept on watching the little cocoon inside the container but it was a boring activity. Nothing much is happening.
Before the New Year came, a male co-worker asked her to hike a mountain with his friends. The sharp stinging pain in her abdomen doesn’t hinder her from walking to the slippery trail. She’s willing to forget everything about this change of the year. To move on with her life with the image of the sunrise.
She’ll start thinking of herself more.
Even in the dark, her sense of sight was heightened. The males in the group started setting up the tent and she was just standing by the edge, taking in the landscape in front of her. In just a few hours, the sunrise will come and everything will be illuminated with its beauty.
She’ll finally forget about them: Yu, Uta, and especially Yuta.
A small fluttering wing came into her sight. The little butterfly flew in front of her as if asking for her attention. Its wings had a shade of gray and pink, a lovely combination. Will that little cocoon in her home reveal a butterfly this pretty? She tried to reach for the small creature, eager to feel it on her fingertips. But she took a wrong step and felt a cold breeze.
She could only hear the collective sounds of her name being called and saw the butterfly fluttering its wings to land on her nose. She finally felt its wings.
Be careful of wings, dear Y/N. Wings? Butterflies have wings. Yu and Uta have wings. Yuta has wings. This will bring you back to those looking after you. Then this will be her death, isn’t it?
She felt the impact of the water behind her before the feeling of falling. Funny she was already falling from the cliff earlier yet she could only feel that sensation now that she was in the water. She knew how to swim and could easily make her way to the shore but she lost all will to survive. Isn’t this better? Isn’t this what she wanted all along?
Y/N closed her eyes letting the water engulf her.
A red light made her open her eyes. An image of two small creatures coming to her, swimming to reach her, blocking the red light. She doesn’t want to be saved now. Yet, when they reached her, she was startled that they were very familiar. Yu and Uta.
Uta was coughing, complaining that she had never swam that deep before. Y/N had to apologize before seeing herself lying on the rocky shore. That is her lifeless body, right? Then why is she watching over herself? “Am I dead?”
Yu shook his head. “You’re in the middle,” He explained which confused her. Middle? “You have two options: to remain living in the human world or go up.” Both Yu and Uta looked up as if stressing that option.
“Go up?” she asked. “Up where?”
“To heaven and be an angel,” Uta claimed. Was she allowed to say those words?
And her? An angel? Maybe these two are the crazy ones. “But I don’t deserve to go there and be an angel.”
“Dad thinks you are one.” Uta started before Yu continued, “He even calls you his angel.”
That sentence seemed to shut you down. You knew the dad they were talking about. But why? Really, an angel? Maybe Yuta was the crazy one.
The older twin showed his dark pitchfork, “If you take this, your soul will return to your body and you could keep continue living in the human world.” The younger twin revealed her bright pink pitchfork, “If you take Uta’s, you’ll go to heaven and be an angel.”
But none of the choices even enticed her. Going back to her life feels like hell and going to heaven means she won’t be seeing them again. She wanted to go where they were. Wanted to be where Yuta is. But how?
Then it hit her. Conversations about people in the demon world came to her like a wave. The way Yu and Uta were brought to hell. How her parents were in hell based on the twins. How Yuta was caged in that place all this time.
She had probably gone crazy.
In a desperate attempt, she took both pitchforks that startled the young devils. Quickly, she struck her lifeless body’s chest, digging the pitchforks so deep that blood started seeping into her drenched clothes. “I wish to be with Yuta in hell.”
Then everything went black.
Y/N opened her eyes in a blinding red light. It feels so hot that she’s almost sweating hard. And when she glanced at where she was lying, it was covered with something red. Rose petals. A bed of roses? Everything was red. Surely this wouldn’t be heaven. The closest that it could be would be a brothel. Then is she back to her own body? But why a brothel?
The wide doors opened, cold breeze started coming in that made her shiver. What the hell even is this place?
Then it struck her.
Hell.
A shadow of a tall man, in a long coat with huge dark wings, was walking to her. The smell of musk filled the air. “What the hell, Y/N?” he shouted, staring at her in fury.
She knew it before he could even speak but why is he hotter in hell? Is she really in hell right now? A smirk left her lips, “I think what you wanted to say was welcome to hell.” she claimed, staring straight at him. “And nice to see you again, Yuta.”
The man chuckled in disbelief, sitting beside her on the bed. Her instinct was to touch his feathered wings. They’re so soft and warm. “You’re crazy. Do you know that?”
She rolled her eyes at that. “I know. I know.” Then squinted her eyes at him, “You’ve been playing with my mind all these times. I’m not even surprised I’ll get crazy.”
Yuta smiled timidly. “You do realize you’re now stuck in hell with me, right?”
Y/N nodded. She realized that when he came to the door. But why? “How?” Yu and Uta just gave her two options. And killing herself doesn’t guarantee a spot in hell. How did she manage to come to this place?
“Because of your final wish.”
Final wish? That she stayed with Yuta in hell? But Y/N only heard that with the topic of the binding contract. “We’re not in a binding…”
“We are,” he claimed, surprising her. “I put a bead inside you so the demons wouldn’t smell you even if I’m away.” A bead? Unconsciously, she touched her abdomen. The kicking inside her. That was the bead. The stinging pain whenever she would talk to guys. That was the bead. The bead Yuta put inside her. A binding contract. His chain on her.
The girl squinted her eyes at him. Now it all makes sense. “Possessive freak.”
Yuta was just laughing, a hearty laugh that made her stare. She isn’t fazed by the fact that Yuta is here in front of her, she’s more astounded at the fact that he is real. That everything was real. “You’ll have to adjust well living here in hell, can you take it Y/N?” Glancing around, she could say that hell isn’t that bad. The demon world is even better than the human world. “You’re going to stay with me, can you do that Y/N?”
“And the twins?” Yuta had to groan, claiming that she liked them so much it was annoying. “Well, I do love them more than I love you.”
“You love me?” he raised an eyebrow.
Y/N laughed wholeheartedly, standing up from the bed. “I went to hell for you, stupid.” Before she could move away from him, Yuta had pulled her back into his arms. His wings wrapped around her. She knew hell was hot but the way his arms and his wings wrapped around her made her feel so warm. “Besides, hell smells so good.” The guy looked surprised, inquiring her what it was. “It smells musky, a manly man smell.” Yuta had a confused look on his face which made her giggle. “You’re emitting that scent now.” She leaned in to sniff his neck as his fingers dug on her waist. “It smells so good.”
The guy had to laugh at that. A musky scent? Right now? “Y/N,” he called which made her hum, “You haven't been here for a long time and I already knew what kind of a demon you are.” The girl gave him a puzzled look. “And I’m glad we’re the same kind of demon.” He licked his lips at the realization in her face. “Shall we start regaining our powers together?”
Before she could speak, Yuta had pushed her to bed making her squeak in delight.
EPILOGUE: DEPTH
Hell had always been hell.
A hot place full of agony. An evil place full of torment.
There’s no joy without torment. But there’s no torment without joy.
Yuta had never thought that the place he despised the most would be the place where he’d be the happiest.
All because of this human girl who chose to be with him.
Uta was the one who said that her ‘mom’ was in the receiving room with her parents. Yu even reported that they had a long talk with Y/N apologizing and thanking them a lot. He wished he was there to at least hold her hand and stop her from crying. But Yuta promised that he wouldn’t meddle in her affairs the same way she didn’t meddle in his.
Because of her egging and warm attitude, Yuta had a chance to talk to his father. He cleared his name, explaining that it wasn’t his fault that a human died. The greater demon apologized to him for the years he had made him a prisoner. He even warmed up to the twins, even calling them his grandkids and promising the two to give them more powers as their grandfather.
Yuta was just flabbergasted. Who’s playing house now?
He opened the huge doors of the receiving area, Y/N staring at him in surprise as she stood by the huge windows. “My angel,” he called making her parents giggle. They excused themselves to leave and when they closed the door, Yuta wrapped his arms on the girl’s waist. “I miss you, angel.”
“I told you not to call me that,” But Yuta only pouted. “Besides, it hasn’t been that long since we last saw each other.”
Yuta kissed her neck, “But I’m getting powerless.” She hissed at that. “I need to regain my strength.”
“Having a lust demon as a husband is so hard.”
“You’re a lust demon yourself.” he revolted. “We’ll be quick,” he started carrying her to the ledge of the window, parting her legs to move closer to her. “And I can smell that you also need this.”
Before he could lean in to kiss her, the doors opened with a loud thud. “Mommy!” Uta called. Yuta leaned his head on Y/N’s shoulder, hissing at the cockblocker. “I’m hungry.”
“You promised to cook a meal for us. We missed your burger patties.” Yu claimed as the older girl stood up, instructing the two to wait for her in the kitchen.
Yuta had a defeated look on his face. Should he ship those two little devils somewhere far away? Maybe he can have his wife on his own. “I’ll be quick,” she claimed, kissing Yuta’s cheeks. “When I get back I’ll prepare your most favorite meal.”
“And what is that?”
“Me, of course.”
His laugh echoed through the whole room making the girl giggle. “I hate to say this but you adapted in this place very well.” Y/N had to giggle, kissing his other cheek. The two kids called for her, shouting mommy which made Yuta laugh. “Hurry up and go to your kids. I’ll wait for you in our room, mommy.”
“Be naked for me, daddy.” She claimed with a wink.
“Sure thing, angel.”
“Don’t call me that!” she shouted from outside making Yuta laugh.
Maybe there’s still hope for him.
Hell wasn’t that bad, actually.
Hell is such a good place. Hell is such a great place.
Especially with her.
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WRONG CONTACT..
best friend! enha when they accidentally text you how they truly feel..
mentions of kms*
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THE SALT UNDER THE SEA ˒˒ 심재윤͏ ⨾ 박종성 ▸ part two of the player’s game series⌇playlist & series tag
the death of your grandma has you returning back to your mother’s seaside hometown—the same town you left jake in a year ago—for good. now that you’re back, so are the feelings you really desperately wished to leave behind. it doesn’t help that now you’re caught in the crossfire of two guys with a rough past who want to be with you.
pairing ⸝⸝⸝ sim jaeyun x reader, park jongseong x reader 𓄵 iηcℓudᥱs 𓈓 cousin jungwon, bestfriend!jay, player!sunghoon, and oc hana (jake’s ex)
genre﹙📓﹚⸝⸝⸝ exes to lovers, bestfriends to ???, angst, smut, fluff, lifeguard!jake, ex player!jake, bestfriend!jay, lifeguard!jay, lifeguarding inaccuracies, love triangle, slice of life, some h2o references, beach au, summer romance
warnings ⸝⸝⸝ if you didn’t like reader in the first part then you won’t like her in this one, reader’s grandma passing, alcohol, multiple unprotected sex scenes, soft dom!jake, mean dom!jay, toxicity, jayke constantly one-uping each other, jealousy and possessiveness, arguing, size training, marking, inexperienced!reader, blowjob/handjob, riding, corruption kink, jake is a munch, pussy eating, oral fixation?, cum swallowing, slight fingering, petnames (baby, pretty, good girl), name calling (slut, whore), praise, reader gets talked through it, creampies, degradation, hair pulling (both m. & f. rec), dirty talk, rough sex, overstimulation, slight manhandling, body worship, dumbification?, cockwarming, service top!jake, pussy drunk!jayke, pictures & videos taken during sex, cumshots/facials
kipo’s note ⸝⸝⸝ literally went through hell trying to get this part two out but here we are!!! once again, this is for the lovely @jjunberry ♡ literally this wouldn’t even be here without you so i hope you like it!! (⁎˃ᆺ˂) thank you to all of you for being on this (very long) journey with me! hehe ^^ i hope you all enjoy this!! ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ︵͡ 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙛𝙚𝙚𝙙𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙧𝙚𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜𝙨 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙚 (⌒‿⌒)♡
∿ [ 27.5k ] ⋆ [ continue on to . . . masterlist ]
[ BEFORE — ONE MONTH SINCE LAST SUMMER ] 𓇼 the salt in your wounds still lingers.
just when you thought your life was finally getting better, finally getting back on track after the summer you’ve had, everything comes crashing down with just one phone call.
it was like watching a car crash in slow motion, your mother’s face. you knew from the start that your grandma wasn’t going to make it, and you couldn’t help but feel guilty. a mere month since you left… would things be different if you and your mom stayed in her seaside hometown like originally planned? deep down, it felt like it was all your fault.
two more months passed before your grandma passed on. “from the sea i came and to the sea i shall return,” she always told you. “don’t be sad when i go, when you see the ocean waves that will be me saying hello.” the day it happened your mom had already booked the next flight out for her funeral.
going through your belongings as you pack your bags makes your guilt run deeper and all it does is make your mind flash back to just three months ago when you were by the sea and everything felt too much. your eyes travel to your dresser—jake’s note and all the developed pictures sat safely in an old jewelry box that you haven’t touched since putting the items in there. you didn’t even look at the pictures after you had gotten them developed, it just hurt too much.
still, your mind was muddled and as you finished packing your suitcase to the brim nothing became clearer. these three months gave you plenty of time to think over the entirety of last summer with detached emotions—a new perspective.
do you still love jake? of course you did, it’s most likely that you always will. how could you not? he was your first love. do you forgive him for everything that he put you through last summer? you still weren’t sure.
but damn if you didn’t miss him.
for the first time you felt the urge to look at the pictures you and him took—fingers twitched towards the jewelry box. with a sigh, you stood from your bed and grabbed it, the soft music playing as you opened the lid. carefully, you grabbed the pictures and made your way back to your bed.
as you flipped through all of them, a memory came to the forefront of your mind with each photo.
a smile pulled at your lips at the photo, it was of you with a shocked smile next to a brightly smiling jake. his arm was around your waist and the two of you were almost chest to chest. “i want my first memory to be of you.”
another of the two of you, a wall of graffiti behind you—right after your first kiss. jake was pressing a kiss to your cheek and you looked flustered. “you said you wanted physical memories, right? say cheese!”
the last one you looked at was of you, jake, and sunghoon before you noticed the tears blurring your vision. the three of you smiling as jake pulled you all close together for the camera. “group picture!”
you glanced over to your phone on your bed. even now, jake still contacts you everyday—even if you don’t answer him. mainly it’s been him checking up on you and making sure that you’re okay, asking how your day was. you haven’t answered a single one of them, yet he hasn’t stopped. against your better judgement, you read every message that came in—the most recent being his condolences.
you don’t know what to say to him. so many things have been left unsaid that every time you go to type a message your fingers freeze and your mind runs with everything you want to tell him. then you decide to just not say anything at all. besides, you didn’t think you'd ever see him again, so what’s the point?
if you were being honest, a part of you is still closed off, untrusting of him. you didn’t want to give your heart to him in fear he might break it again. you refused to feel like that again.
with a heavy and shaky sigh you put the pictures back where they belonged and made your way downstairs with your suitcase.
the next day you were on a flight to your mother’s seaside hometown, just like you were three months ago. jake’s letter filled your mind and your dreams surrounded him.
“i love you. i love you. i love—”
your mom nudged you awake just as the plane was beginning to land. you rubbed your bleary eyes and blinked rapidly to try and get your eyes to adjust to the bright sunlight. nudging you again, your mom said, “wake up, we’re about to land.”
deja vu hit you and hit you hard. rolling out your sore neck, you prepared yourself for the landing. you still hated planes.
the drive to your aunt’s house was silent, as you got settled in and prepared for the funeral it was even quieter. your ears practically rang with the sound of silence and your body felt like it weighed a ton with the heaviness lingering in the air.
you all were dressed in black in the living room. your aunt was desperately trying to lighten the mood, and it was only half working. “come on everyone, you know she’d come back from the grave and kill us if she saw our faces right now! she wouldn’t want us to be sad.”
your mom nodded sadly, reciting your grandma’s words. “don’t be sad when i go, when you see the ocean waves that will be me saying hello.”
“exactly! now let’s go and celebrate the life she lived instead of being sad it came to an end!” your aunt smiled softly.
it was a lovely service, your grandma’s funeral. you think that she would be happy with it.
you and jungwon decided to walk back home after the funeral. honestly, you both didn’t think you could be in a car with the dark cloud surrounding you all, it felt too claustrophobic.
on the way home you both stopped at a food place since you were still hungry. the two of you ate silently before jungwon looked behind you and suddenly stood to his feet, murmuring a quick “i’ll be right back.”
you looked behind you at his retreating figure, confused. just as you were turning back to your food you saw it out of the corner of your eye. your heart stopped. you could barely see with jungwon blocking the way but you could spot him anywhere.
it was jake.
you continued eating. you weren’t ready to face him, especially not right now. you don’t think you could even look at him right now. instead, you opted to watch the scene from the corner of your eye.
you could barely hear jungwon and jake’s conversation, only managing to hear jungwon say, “she really doesn’t need any drama right now, man…” jake backed off, but not before you turned and the two of you made the briefest of eye contact before you quickly looked away, taking another bite out of your sandwich.
all you managed to catch was the blonde of his hair that he pushed off his forehead as he turned.
now you wished you took the chance to get a good look at him. it’s only been three months since you last saw him, but already you were forgetting the exact color of his eyes and the way his voice sounded. were they more of a honey brown or a mahogany? you didn’t remember.
it was eating away at you how much you already forgot.
you and jungwon finished your food in silence. before the two of you walked back home, he asked if you wanted to swim before you left. you shook your head as you stared out to the sea. it was a sunny day, but you just couldn’t bear to step off the boardwalk. “maybe next time i visit,” you said, though you didn’t know if there would be a next time.
[ RETURN — A YEAR SINCE YOU’VE TOUCHED SAND ] 𓇼 two hundred seventy-four days since you’ve last seen him.
your heart beat fast as you looked out the plane window to your mother’s seaside hometown—your new home. there was no need for your mom to nudge you awake since you weren’t able to sleep for the entirety you were on the plane, the nerves were eating at you.
you never thought you’d be back here, never thought that you’d ever say goodbye to your own hometown—which was also your late father’s—but here you were.
when your mom told you that you’d be moving here permanently you didn’t know how to feel. on one hand, you understood your mom’s decision. it was just you and her out there miles away from your family and everything must’ve reminded her of your father. it reminded you of him too. on the other hand, you desperately wished she would change her mind.
it was enough seeing that one glimpse of jake nine months ago, but to see him over and over and over again? you didn’t think you could take it. he still texted you, even more now since, and you still haven’t answered. things between the two of you still remain unsaid.
but you also couldn’t help but count down the seconds until you laid your eyes on him again. it set your skin alight and you couldn’t help the small smile on your face and the giddiness you felt. was it selfish, yes, but after everything you think you’re finally ready to face him again.
to give your relationship another chance. to give him your heart again and not be fearful that he would break it, that he’d keep it guarded and safe. after all, he said he would wait for you.
and if he didn’t protect your heart, you’d pull back and it would be as if you never had anything to do with him again.
“y/n? are you listening?” you heard your mother’s voice call out. you snapped back to reality, blinking a couple of times to get your wits.
you were no longer on the plane. now you were lugging suitcases into your aunt’s house. your aunt was delighted to hear that you and your mom would be moving here. there was plenty of room in the house until the two of you got your own place.
“mhm,” you mumbled, though you definitely weren’t listening.
your mom sat the suitcase she was carrying in front of you and grabbed your shoulders. “is it that boy from last summer? what was his name? jacob?”
“jake,” jungwon answered for you as he walked out the front door to grab more boxes.
your mom snapped her fingers. “jake! that’s it. listen, i know you had some problems moving here because of him, but use this as a way to put yourself out there more than last summer! there’s more wonderful people here than just jake.” she gave you a sympathetic smile and continued carrying stuff inside while you remained planted to the same spot in the driveway.
it wasn’t “just jake” that worried you. it was all of his friends and hana. you didn’t want another summer full of drama, especially if you and jake did start dating again.
getting all your boxes and suitcases into the house went quick and relatively easy. you decided on unpacking all of your things later, right now your mind was too clouded.
jake’s letter sat carefully in your anxious hands. you must’ve read it a million times over now and you could barely wrap your head around it still.
“two people who are meant to be will always find a way back to each other. and we are meant to be. no matter how long it takes, i’ll wait for you.”
it was now or never. you grabbed your phone and opened your messages up to your conversation with jake. his last message was from this morning, hoping that you had a good day today. he must not know that you’re back and for good. with a shaky sigh, you let your fingers move across the keyboard.
you: meet me at our spot.
your hands shook as you quickly made your way downstairs and out the front door. your heart raced and your breathing was labored as you let your feet guide you. the more you thought about jake the faster your feet carried you towards him.
you felt the smile grow on your face as you caught a glimpse of the sea and the sand, the grittiness already finding its way into your sandals. you were moving so fast that you didn’t notice the person in front of you until you smacked directly into their chest.
“oh my god!” you exclaimed as you came to a sudden halt, eyes wide, “i’m so sorry, i wasn’t paying attention to where i was going!”
“we’ve got to stop meeting like this,” a familiar voice joked. you looked up, the smile on your face widening more as you stood face to face with jay again. his smile matched yours and you laughed out of disbelief.
“jay!” you laughed, “it’s been a while, how have you been?”
jay ran a hand through his damp hair. “same old, same old. how have you been? i heard you left this place for dead! never thought i’d see you back here again.” the teasing in his voice was obvious but you could see the concern in his eyes. flashes of the last time you saw him ran through your mind. funnily enough, you ran straight into him just a year ago while running from jake.
your smile faltered slightly but you tried your hardest to not think about last year. “well, let me be the first to tell you that i’m back for good!” jay’s eyebrows raised in shock and you nodded. “just moved back with my mom! you’ll be seeing me around a lot more now,” you continued playfully.
“i’m sorry about your loss, by the way,” jay said, expression suddenly serious. you waved a hand in the air, letting him know that it was okay. time and place. “well, i’m glad you’re back! this place really sucks without someone like you around,” jay added.
laughing you shook your head slightly, “then we should hang out sometime!”
“text me the plans and i’m there!” jay replied and pulled out his phone. he passed it to you with a “new contact” screen opened and you quickly filled out your information.
“i gotta go, but we will be hanging out sometime this week!” you waved as you began to step away. jay nodded with a smile. “clear your schedule!” you tossed over your shoulder as you walked away. behind you, you heard jay’s laugh.
“wouldn’t miss it for the world!”
you shook your head, continuing on your path to you and jake’s “spot.” this time you took your walk slow so you wouldn’t run headfirst into anybody else.
jake nodded along absentmindedly to whatever sunghoon was saying to him, not listening at all as he stared out at the people swimming in the ocean and the calm ocean waves.
he was bored out of his mind.
suddenly his phone vibrated and he pulled it out of his pocket. jake blinked a couple times to make sure what he was seeing was real. once he saw that it was you who was undoubtedly texting him, he jumped to his feet.
you: meet me at our spot.
“—and then i told her that i already warned her. this is the relationship that she—hey! what the fuck, jake?” sunghoon called behind him as jake suddenly took off.
jake could care less about sunghoon right now when you were here. you’re finally back, and not only that—you’re asking to see him. jake feels like his heart might explode. nine months since he’s last gotten the tiniest glimpse of you. nine months since he last had his breath taken away. a whole year since you’ve slipped through his fingers.
he wasn’t letting you go this time.
“where are you going?” sunghoon yelled, yet jake made no efforts to stop or even slow down. distantly, he could hear sunghoon shout, “asshole!”
like always, jake made it to your spot before you did. it’s only mere seconds until you’re arriving after him, taking his breath away once again as he goes to turn and sees you standing there.
you look so different, yet the exact same as when he last saw you. all jake can do is stare at you wide-eyed, mouth agape as his head completely empties.
“y/n,” jake finally breathes.
in response, you inhale sharply. “jake…” you notice that his hair is it’s natural color—a dark brown. the blonde hair he had last year is nowhere to be seen whatsoever and his hair is even longer than it was, half of it disheveled and touching the top of his lips and the other half tucked semi-neatly behind his ear. and his eyes… how could you ever forget?
brown moonstone. they look just as they did when the two of you laid under the stars together.
without thinking the two of you rush towards each other before abruptly stopping just inches away. hesitantly, jake closes the gap as he reaches towards you and gently places his hand on your cheek. you can feel the way it tremors—as if his hand might go through you. he takes a small step towards you until you can almost feel his breath fan across your cheeks as your eyes flutter closed for the briefest of moments.
as they open you look up at him, at the eyes that put you through so much. you pressed your lips to his softly.
instantly, jake is kissing you back. in it, you can feel everything that he’s been wanting to say to you for the past year. the kiss is desperate, searing, and passionate. it rips the oxygen right from your lungs and still you wrap your arms around jake’s neck to pull him closer. like if you stopped kissing him the world would crumble beneath the two of you.
only when you both can’t stand the suffocation anymore do you pull away—just barely. your heavy breathing mixes and your eyes are still closed. your grip on the back of his shirt tightens and jake leans his forehead against yours heavily.
“i missed you,” he says, just above a whisper. “i missed you so fucking much, you don’t understand. i’m so sorry.”
you kiss him again because it’s the only way you can show him how much you missed him too. jake’s hands move to your waist and pulls you closer so you’re completely pressed up against him.
memories of last summer force it’s way through your clouded mind. the two of you standing in this exact spot as he begged you not to leave.
abruptly, you broke away from him, hands pushing against his chest as you took several steps back. you turned your back to him as you tried to catch your breath, running your hands down your face. inhaling sharply, tears sprang to your eyes at all of the overwhelming emotions you were feeling. exhaling, you tried to steady your heartbeat that filled your ears.
being in this place wasn’t helping. as you looked around the rocky walls, more and more memories flowed through your mind. “i hate you,” you spoke, turning completely to face jake. your voice lacked the punch the phrase needed. instead, it sounded almost… defeated. a tear slid down your cheek.
“i know,” jake replied. he knew what you were really saying, could feel it in the same desperate way you kissed him back.
“and i hate you for what you’ve done to me,” you added while drawing closer to him.
“i know.”
you drew closer until your tight fists we’re resting against his chest. you avoided his eyes as more tears fell. “and i hate that i spent the entire year we were apart only thinking about you—i hate you.”
jake could feel the way your body shook against him. he took your closed fists into his hands. “i know, baby, i know.”
and he did. he knew that “i hate you” really meant “i love you.” and you did. you really did love him.
jake moved your hands back to your sides, letting them go but having his hands still hovering near them. “walk with me?” he asked, moving to wipe your tears away with the pads of his thumbs gently. you nodded in response as you stared at him finally. jake dipped his head down towards you and softly pressed a kiss against your lips before guiding you out of the cave-like opening.
silently, the two of you walked side-by-side in the sand through less populated paths. you both didn’t speak, and it was probably for the best as you both processed everything between the two of you.
you were walking along an empty part of the beach, the sun just beginning to set, when you decided to break the silence. “i missed you too,” you spoke, your eyes following the way your feet left footprints in the sand.
you looked to your side at jake, “i really missed you.”
the two of you came to a stop. jake looked at you with furrowed brows, like he still couldn’t believe if what he was experiencing right now was true or not. he kissed you.
if even possible, this kiss was more passionate and desperate than the last. your already swollen lips were hot to the touch and no matter how much the two of you pulled each other closer, it wasn’t close enough. the kiss then turned feverish and you both pulled away to breathe. a silent question hung in the air and you nodded ever so slightly.
jake then intertwined your hands, pulling you off into some direction you weren’t familiar with until he was pulling you into a house that you could only assume was his. you barely even wrapped your head around the fact that you were actually in his house for the first time before he was pulling you up the stairs and into his room.
his lips met yours again and finally all the unsaid things spilled out from between the two of you as you pulled each other’s clothes off. jake laid you on the bed, fingers just barely gripping the waistband of your shorts and underwear. you were under him in just that and your bra.
“yes or no?” he asked you breathlessly, voice low.
“yes,” you responded. just as fast as you did, you were half naked underneath him. jake didn’t wait as he unclasped your bra with one hand and tossed it somewhere out of sight as his lips smashed against yours. he pulled away and you barely got to blink before the both of you were completely naked.
you watched as jake reached over to his nightstand and grabbed the ponytail off of it. he messily tied back his hair before placing hot kisses down your stomach. you fought the urge not to moan. he continued slowly down your stomach and just when he reached right above where you needed him the most, he looked up at you with his signature smirk.
you inhaled and his lips attached to your core, causing you to gasp loudly. his arms wrapped tightly around your thighs to keep them apart as his tongue pulled you closer and closer over the edge. you almost broke completely when he pushed his fingers inside you, curling them at just the right angle that made you see stars.
your hands were in his hair—messing up his already messy ponytail—and your moans filled his bedroom, not even worried that someone else could be in the house. all you cared about was how good he was making you feel and how much you missed his body on yours.
it didn’t take long until the rope was snapping and you shakily told him that you were about to cum. moments later jake’s fingers and mouth was dripping and he was licking them clean while you hazily stared at him, mind too foggy until his lips were suddenly on yours again and his hands were trailing up your sides.
“i need you,” you whined softly as you stared into jake’s eyes, “please.” you clawed at his back in attempt to bring him closer, your body on fire and he was the only way to bring down the heat.
jake pressed a soft kiss to your lips and looked down between your bodies as he lined his hard and dripping cock up with your entrance. he looked up, “tell me if it hurts, okay?” you nodded in return, bucking your hips up slightly and gasping when the tip of his cock grazed your sensitive clit.
slowly, jake pushed into you and it was much less uncomfortable than it was the first time. he waited a moment, eyeing the way your body reacted before looking at you in a silent question. you nodded and slowly he began to move.
high-pitched moans and whimpers left your mouth the more and more your body adjusted to him, and the more and more euphoric you felt. you and jake left love bites all over each other’s bodies without a care of the fact that it was in places people could definitely see, you were too caught up in the feeling of him surrounding you and jake was too caught up in the fact that you were finally in his arms again.
he barely let you out of his grasp, body firmly pushed against yours, as he moved in and out of you at a steady pace. his head was cloudy with your pretty sounds and his lips nipped at any skin he could. jake wished the both of you could stay like this forever, just the two of you together. he was scared of what would happen when he pulled out of you and it all ended.
would you regret it? say it was a mistake and that he should pretend like it never happened? or would this push the two of you back together again like he hoped? after all, you were the only one for him.
you inhaled sharply, brows drawn together and back arching off the soft blankets, and jake knew your body well enough before you started to clench down on him that you were about to come undone on him again. “j-jake…” you whimpered as your eyes squeezed shut.
“shh, baby, i know.” he moved so his thumb was now rubbing circles into your clit and watched the way you tried to shut your legs with a soft chuckle. he held them apart with his free hand. “let go for me,” he murmured, continuing his pace.
jake moaned and bit down hard on his bottom lip the more you clenched down on his poor cock. he felt like he was going to lose it at any moment as he tried to bring you closer and closer to the edge. “that feels good, yeah?” he asked you, accent thick and low. that sent you right over the edge, incoherent words falling from your lips, and you made a complete mess on his cock.
“shit,” jake said sharply before a moan escaped him. the sight went straight to his dick and it was almost instant with the way it twitched and he was cumming inside you, filling you up even more. his hips moved lazily, watching the way the cum spilled out of you and around him, painting his cock a pretty white.
slowly he pulled out of you and you whined at the loss of him, fingernails digging into his shoulders. more creamy white spilled out of you in a thick load and jake fought the urge to not push himself back into you and fuck you again.
he kissed your inner thighs and slowly made his way up your stomach and until he reached your lips in a heated kiss. your fingers raked through his hair, causing it to fall from the ponytail and spill out around both of your faces. once the both of you pulled away for air, you couldn’t help but giggle.
“what?” jake said, looking down at you with a bright smile. you shook your head. you were honestly just glad to be with him. you leaned up to catch his lips in another kiss. it felt like you were addicted to his lips and you cursed yourself in your head for ever putting you in the situation where you might’ve never been able to kiss them again.
jake looked at you fondly. “stay here, i’ll get something to clean you up.”
after a brief moment he came back with a damp cloth and a towel and gently wiped you down, making sure not to press too hard since you were still sensitive. once he was satisfied he laid down next to you and pulled you to his chest. “you did so good for me, pretty.”
your heart swirled at the familiar petname.
you weren’t sure when the two of you fell asleep or for how long, the sun’s golden rays just peaking above the horizon and starting a beautiful sunset, before you woke up. jake was still sound asleep next to you, the two of you still naked, and you slowly and quietly got up from the bed. you decided to take a look around his room since you’ve never been in it before.
he had old trophies and medals for various things, one of them being swimming, along with pictures of what you assumed to be an old swim team. there was pictures of his family and friends around that brought a smile to your face the more you looked at them. one in particular caught your eye. it was a polaroid of jake, jay, and jake’s bestfriend sunghoon.
you eyes widened. you thought jake and jay hated each other—if last summer was anything to show. why did they have a picture together? under it you saw that somebody wrote “swimming buds for life!” you checked the other pictures he had around again but this was the only photo that included jay. it made your head spin.
a familiar picture on his desk caught your eyes and you moved towards that instead. jake had gotten the pictures you took last summer developed too and had even dated them on the back. gently, you took the stack into your hands and looked at the picture on top.
it was the two of you at the abandoned skate park where you had your first kiss together. your head was tilted against his as you both smiled for the camera. a smile made its way onto your face and continued to grow as you continued flipping through the pictures, making your way to sit on the edge of jake’s bed.
you felt movement behind you and suddenly arms were wrapped around you as jake leaned up behind you to look over your shoulder. you gasped lightly when his hands rested at the lowest part of your hips and he placed feather-light kisses along your neck. “your awake,” you smiled as a chill ran down you, causing jake to chuckle lowly, sleep still at the edges of his voice. “i am.”
suddenly you were reminded at the fact that you both were still naked and the way your pussy now throbbed at his sleepy voice. you swallowed thickly and turned your attention back to the pictures in your hands. flipping the picture on the top to the back, you gasped and turned to jake in slight shock.
in your hands laid multiple pictures of you completely fucked out and dripping cum on a picnic blanket, illuminated by the moonlight and the flash of the camera. “asshole!” you nudged jake with a shocked smile and pulling a laugh from him. “i can't believe you took pictures of this!”
you looked back to the pictures with wide eyes as jake laughed more. “not funny…” you mumbled with a pout. you held one up where you were in full view of the camera along with jake’s cum covered cock hovering above you, “i look so out of it.”
jake took the photo from you and inspected it with a grin. “you were.”
you nudged him again, hard. jake laughed and wrapped his arms around you to pull you into him, placing kisses along your jaw. “it doesn’t matter,” he started, leaning his head against yours so his lips were near your ear, “these ones are for my eyes only.”
you giggled sheepishly, pushing him away from you as you tried to not let a wet patch form beneath you. you looked towards the window through the barely opened blinds. the sun was just about to set and you knew your mom was most likely wondering where you’ve been all day. jake followed your stare and you heard him sigh softly. “i should probably head home,” you stated quietly.
you turned to look at him, seriousness suddenly seeping into your features. “we’re gonna have to talk about this… about what this all means…”
“we can go slow,” jake said, cupping your cheek with one of his hands. “it’ll mean whatever you want it to mean.”
“bit too late to go slow,” you chuckled and he followed. you looked down to your lap, fingers fidgeting with the edge of the towel next to you. “i really don’t want drama this summer, jake.”
you glanced up to look him in the eyes, those pretty brown eyes of his. “i don’t think i can take another summer full of it,” you continued. jake nodded in agreement.
“this summer is just for the two of us. i promise.”
you let his words sink in before leaning up to place your lips against his in a soft and slow kiss. “now…” jake said as he pulled away, “are we just gonna stay naked, or what? because i’m really starting to lose my mind over here.”
heat crept across your face, especially as his eyes dropped to your nakedness. you covered your face with your hands as you turned away, jake’s laughter behind you, and moved to where he threw your articles of clothing. “timeout!” you muttered, as you pulled your panties on.
jake laughed more, “again?! hm, we’ll see…” he got up to get clothed as well. “let me walk you home.”
[ SUMMER — THE TIDES ARE PULLED BY THE MOON ] 𓇼 and you are pulled by him.
you almost jumped out of you skin, fingers grabbing at your pajamas, as you opened the bathroom door and were immediately face to face with your cousin jungwon. “jesus!” you nearly screeched as you held onto the door.
“so… jake walking you home, huh? what’s that all about?” jungwon asked. he took a few steps back to let you leave the doorway of the bathroom and you leaned against the wall nearest to it.
it was dark outside now and your face heated at the mention of jake. fumbling over your words slightly, you replied, “we were just… talking things from last summer over. he wanted to apologize in person.”
more heat spread across your face. it was surely one way to apologize…
in order for jungwon to not see your flustered face, you turned and made your way to your room, jungwon following in tow. you opened your door and walked around the room as you got ready for bed. discreetly, you tried to hide all of the love bites on you, suddenly regretting being so careless about where jake marked you.
“hm,” jungwon hummed, “are you planning on getting back together with him?” he sat at the edge of your bed, eyes trailing your movements. you saw the way his eyes stared too hard at a spot on your neck with a raised eyebrow.
you sighed softly. truly, you weren’t sure quite yet. you had just arrived and it was too early to tell how this summer was going to fair. and you really didn’t want this summer to be a repeat of the last one. you wanted to get more settled in before you decided to make any rash decisions—even though you and jake had already slept together just mere hours after you arrived.
you sighed to yourself again. maybe that wasn’t the best of ideas.
“i don’t know,” you replied, plopping down onto your bed next to him. “after everything… i-i just don’t want to be caught in another web. i can’t go through that again.”
jungwon nodded solemnly and rested a comforting hand on your back. “whatever you choose—be careful, y/n.”
this time you felt the gravity of his words—the same words he told you last summer when he tried to warn you in meddling in things you were unfamiliar with. in getting involved with jake and his and his friends’ game. when everyone tried to warn you.
even if jake claims that he’s changed, you needed to see it for yourself. not just through words, but through actions. and then, and only then, would you consider giving your whole relationship another chance.
“whatever happens, i’m here for you,” jungwon continued. you gave him a warm smile. “i will. and thank you,” you replied.
after talking to jungwon you decided to text jake with your requirements. your thumbs fiddled with each other and your heart raced as you waited for the three little dots that indicated he was replying to show up.
jake: i promise you i’ll do anything it takes to earn your trust back. anything. i’ll show you that giving us another chance will be worth it, that giving me another chance is worth it.
“everything is exactly the same as before, so there shouldn’t be any trouble,” mrs. song said as she led you back towards the front of the juice bar. you nodded in response as you followed her. “can you start later this week? say… wednesday?” she added in question.
“yes!” you nodded again politely. “wednesday is good! oh—can i ask you a quick question?”
“shoot,” mrs. song replied while waving off some kid trying to climb over the counter for more of the candy that sat in a bowl.
“last summer, a girl named hana worked here with me… does she still work here?” you asked as you looked to the floor with furrowed brows. pain stabbed through your heart and your mouth felt like it was full of sand just from saying her name. you hated the feelings her name evoked in you.
to think that you had an actual friend here in her… when all she wanted was to use you for her own gain. you knew it would be a ridiculous hope with how small the town was, but you still hoped you never saw her face again. never heard her name again. never felt these feelings that she caused. if you ever saw her again it would be too soon.
“oh, hana?” mrs. song questioned while focusing her attention back on you. “fired her not long after you left. horrible employee—i don’t know why i didn’t fire her sooner. or hired her in the first place.”
you let out a small sigh of relief that mrs. song seemed to pick up on. there was no way you could spend another summer sharing the same space as hana. it was impossible.
“you had problems with her too, yeah? hm,” mrs. song snorted.
after a bit more chatting and going over your future schedule you began to head out, trailing slowly along the shore. water lapped at your feet and your sandals swung limply from your fingers as you stared out at the calm waves. you think you could like it here after all.
“y/n!” you heard your voice being called.
breaking your attention from the sea, you turned in the direction of the voice. a smile grew onto your face. “jay!” you called back as he jogged up to you. “nice seeing you again!”
jay stood in front of you, holding a hand up to block the sun from getting in his eyes while he used his other hand to push his hair off of his forehead. you guided him away from the shore and towards one of the empty tables on the boardwalk. “was just getting ready to start my shift!” he replied.
you then noticed the outfit he was wearing—red shorts and a white tank top that read “GUARD” in bold red capital letters. a red lanyard with a whistle attached hung around his neck and he had a red visor tucked under his arm.
the two of you sat at the empty table and jay placed his visor onto it. he leaned forward slightly, a big smile on his face, “but i still have time to chat.”
and just like that it felt as if you were back at that campfire talking about anything and everything—like you and jay had been friends for forever now and it hasn’t been a year since you’ve last seen each other. the two of you just fell into such a natural sync.
you were even opening up to him about everything that happened last summer. mainly because you really couldn’t talk to anyone about it but him. he already understood all of the context and it was just so easy to talk to jay. you hadn’t realized how much you just needed a friend. and jay listened to it all attentively, not missing a single beat and inquiring about things you haven’t even realized.
“but enough about my past…” you murmured sheepishly, turning to the side to try and hide how warmth spread across your face. you just spend ten minutes talking about yourself and your problems without regarding the fact that it was probably coming off as extremely rude. “so how has the past year been for you?” you asked him.
you then gave him a cheeky smile. “any girls you’ve been seeing? interested in? tell me!”
jay laughed and shook his head a little. “no, i haven’t been seeing anyone. pretty much everyone here i’ve known for forever now… not the best candidates.” he leaned back in his seat and crossed his arms as he looked at you through his lashes. the corners of his mouth rose and he looked off to the side. “there has been this one girl, though… she’s definitely caught my interest.”
you gasped and leaned forward with your hands flat on the table. “what?! why didn’t you say anything sooner? i’ve been over here talking about my pathetic love life when we could've been talking about how good yours is going! have you talked to her yet? what’s her name?” the words flew out your mouth a mile a minute.
jay held his hands up as he chuckled, “woah, woah, slow down. i’ve talked to her a couple times now—but only briefly! i think she’s new in town, probably been here just a little bit longer than you have, actually.”
you grinned, “i’m excited for you! you gotta let me know how it all plays out. and don’t think i didn’t realize how you didn’t tell me her name!” jay’s face quickly turned red.
he stood from his chair, “ah, well, it’s all very new… haha, oh look at the time! my shift is about to start! bye, y/n!” he turned quickly as his words blurted out, throwing his words over his shoulder.
you rolled your eyes and stood to your feet. “whatever, i’ll get it out of you soon enough…”
jay pulled you into a hug as he nervously chuckled. “i seriously doubt it!” he mumbled under his breath before he jogged off.
“i will get her name out of you!” you called as you shook your head at him and watched his retreating figure, smiling softly.
you turned and continued walking aimlessly through the sand, feet sinking into the grains and leaving footprints. you watched as kids laughed and played with each other, darting around you and muttering passing apologies.
you were focused on the kid that almost ran into you running after their friends, not focused at all on the way jake crept up on you. “boo!” he shouted by your ear. you nearly jumped out of your skin, a loud yell erupting from your mouth. once you realized that it was just him, you hit him in his chest hard.
“jake?! are you serious!” you scolded, heat rushing to your face in embarrassment. you covered your face and he pulled you into him as he laughed hysterically. you buried your face in his chest briefly before turning out of his grasp and quickly walking away from the scene, trying to ignore the pairs of eyes that were on you.
jake trailed behind you and you heard him laugh more. “i’m sorry, i’m sorry! but that was so funny!” he said as he caught up to you. “you should’ve seen your face.”
he wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you closer to him. “what are you doing here?” jake asked as he glanced down at you.
“getting my old job back, what are you doing here?” you asked in response, “besides scaring me half to death?”
his smile grew, “came down here bored, until i saw you.” his eyes lit up suddenly. “oh! we should make another bucket list for this summer! since… since we didn’t get to finish the one from last summer…” he trailed off, eyes looking to the side briefly in regret.
you smiled at him, trying to diffuse the sudden awkward tension. “we should!”
jake guided you near the shore and the two of you sat in the sand. the two of you debated what to do this summer for a while, only managing to come up with a couple of things. one of which was going to this year’s summer splash event since you left last year before it happened.
“you’ll still be my date, right?” jake asked shyly. you chucked and nodded. “if you’ll still have me!”
jake gave you that same fond stare that he gave you before you left his house and it made butterflies erupt in your stomach. “of course i do,” he said.
it was such a simple sentence filled with so much. your brows knitted together ever so slightly and you watched the way his eyes darted towards your lips. it then seemingly felt like it was only the two of you on the beach, and you swear that the two of you slowly moved closer to each other.
the sudden shrill of a child’s cry broke the two of you out of your trance and you both snapped towards where a kid was crying over the way the sea messed up his sandcastle. you turned towards jake again and gave him a sheepish smile.
“uh—how about swimming! um, you teach me how to swim… since i can’t…” you sputtered awkwardly, hands waving in the air at the ocean. jake chuckled at the way you suddenly reverted back to your timid nature around him and nodded.
“yeah… i can teach you how to swim!”
you nodded after him. jake began to stand to his feet and you looked at him confused. “i can teach you now, in fact. do you have your bathing suit?”
you rose to your feet as well and nodded. you pulled the tank top strap off your shoulder and looked down to double check, nodding again when you saw the white fabric of your bikini.
jake tucked his finger underneath the thin strap that tied the bikini top around your neck. he pulled at it lightly before letting go and then smirked at you. “good,” he said simply.
your cheeks were already flushed with heat, but the heat just got hotter when you realized why he was smirking. it was the bathing suit you wore to the beach party.
playfully—and in an attempt to mask your warm face—you rolled your eyes and looked away from him. “get your mind out of the gutter,” you mumbled.
jake laughed, “all i said was ‘good!’”
“anyway,” you said, “we should add our names to that skate park! i feel like that would help me really cement my being here permanently.”
laughing harder, jake replied, “isn’t that vandalism? are you even good at graffiti?” he suddenly stopped laughing, expression serious. “wait—permanently? you’re here permanently?!”
still on the subject of the skate park, you shrugged. “it’s abandoned anyways, isn’t it? and how hard is it to use a spray can to write our names? it’s not like we’re tagging it, tagging it.”
jake grabbed your shoulders and your focus zeroed in on him. his eyes were wide as he looked into yours. “you’re here permanently?!” he repeated. you nodded, confusion shifting into realization at the fact that you haven’t told him yet. “yes, permanently. my mom and i moved here the day we met at our spot,” you said.
jake’s hands moved from your shoulders to cup your face. he then kissed you passionately, absolutely taking your breath away. you giggled when he pulled away and he started kissing you all over your face. “jake!” you giggled more, pushing him away from you slightly.
“i’m sorry,” he said a bit breathlessly, “you just don’t know how relieved i am to hear that.” he chuckled awkwardly as he gave you some space and tucked some of his hair behind his ear. “so, skate park? got it, anything you want to do! we have all the time in the world.”
you mind immediately snapped back to the skate park. “i feel like that’s not as adventurous as our last bucket list though!” you pouted.
jake pulled you towards where there were some free towels at the boardwalk. he turned back and cheekily smiled at you, “i can think of something adventurous.” you stopped in your tracks and swatted his shoulder. “i’m just saying!” jake laughed. “we’ve done a lot, but there’s still some things we haven’t done yet… you catch me?”
heat crept up the back of your neck and you crossed your arms across your chest. jake’s eyes darted down to the action. indulging him, you asked, “like what?”
jake stepped closer to you and reached up to mess with the straps of your bikini. he leaned more into you and dropped his voice so only you would hear what he was saying. “different places, different positions… there’s so many things i could do to you that you haven’t experienced yet.” your eyes connected with his.
“or you could do to me,” he added, lower.
you looked away, face on fire. jake dropped his hands from the straps he was fiddling with to his sides. he took another step closer to you until you both were almost chest to chest and grazed his hand along the side of your waist. jake leaned down until his lips were at the shell of your ear. “if you want,” he whispered.
he pulled away, smiling at you like he didn’t just insinuate what he did and cause arousal to pool in your bikini bottoms. he grabbed your wrist lightly and pulled you the rest of the way to the towels, handing you a rolled up one from the basket and taking one from himself.
you were still in shock, eyes wide as you stared at him. you then snapped out of it when you realized he was chuckling. tucking the towel underneath your arm, you used the basket of towels to lean forward towards him. discreetly, you slid your hand down his stomach and stopped right above the hem of his shorts. “sounds fun,” you smiled innocently. “i know exactly what i could do.”
you hand trailed lower before you backed away from him. you held in your laugh at just how quickly the bulge in his shorts was rising and his ears turned red. you looked towards the sea, “so where do you wanna start?” you asked casually. “i’m gonna have to strip these clothes off first.”
you turned back to him and smiled again, that same innocent smile.
the corner of jake’s mouth rose in a “two can play at this game” way. he opened his mouth to speak, but got cut off by someone suddenly entering your conversation. “look at what the cat dragged back in,” the voice said, mean and full of bitterness.
you almost instantly recognized that voice, and it seems that jake did too since his face instantly twisted into one of annoyance and hatred. he moved closer to you while also hiding his boner with the basket of towels.
hana walked up to the two of you with a sneer and a dripping popsicle in one hand. two girls you never seen before trailed behind her with a matching sneer. you rolled your eyes and crossed your arms against your chest, leaning your weight towards jake. “thought the two of you went up in flames last summer?” hana added.
she focused her attention on you, “don’t tell me you’re still falling for his ‘i love you’s’… how lame.”
jake scoffed, before either of you could say anything you noticed jungwon come up to you all. he pushed past the two random girls and shoulder-checked hana as he came to your side. “look what desperation dragged in. i know the saying is ‘misery loves company’ but this is just getting pathetic, hana. don’t you have a job to be at?” hana scoffed and opened her mouth, but jungwon beat her to it.
“oh yeah, you don’t. because you got fired. i think it’s time you go find one, don’t you think?”
hana rolled her eyes. “whatever,” she said, trying to pretend like she wasn’t bothered. she stuck the popsicle in her mouth briefly as she turned towards the girls. “didn’t want to stick around you losers anyways.”
she looked over her shoulder at you, “careful, y/n. you know jake’s still in love with me.” she then winked at him and jake’s face twisted further into disgust.
“you fucking wish. i was never even infatuated with you in the first place. you already know that sunghoon is the reason why i even stayed with you for those four months,” jake spit out, angrier than you’ve ever seen him. “stop making my life fucking hell and just move on already. i know i already have.”
you saw the way hana’s face fell and how she quickly masked it with a sickly sweet smile. “keep telling yourself that, jakey,” she said before walking away.
you loudly scoffed at her retreating body and the way she purposefully swayed her hips back and forth as you turned towards jake and jungwon. “the audacity she has is honestly astounding,” jungwon said, face mirroring yours.
“delusional,” you added, “the lot of them.”
“forget her,” jake said as he pulled you and jungwon’s attention back to him. he then smiled, “let’s go swimming!”
“how hard is it to put one arm in front of the other?!” jungwon demonstrated how to use your arms to swim once again as a laugh was pulled from him. he swam out farther into the sea and then swam back, standing where you and jake were. “see? easy.”
“i’m doing the best that i can!” you exclaim, throwing your hands up in the air in mild frustration as the remnants of a wave hit against your stomach.
jake then chimed in, “it’s actually not that easy!” jungwon turned to him in confusion and jake swam out a little from where the two of you stood. “there’s actually a certain way you want to move your arms in order to not hurt your shoulders.”
you turned to jungwon with a triumphant smirk. “see!” you said while crossing your arms. jungwon rolled his eyes.
jake continued demonstrating, specifically pointing out how to move your body to not hurt your shoulders. he also showed how to gain more speed and stay under the water for longer with breathing techniques. “here, let’s do it together,” he said, swimming towards you.
he made sure your positioning was correct and guided you slowly towards the deeper part of where you all stood. “like this! if you’re feeling any type of pain in your shoulders than you’re doing it wrong.”
after a couple minutes of adjusting and positioning, you really thought you were getting the hang of it. when jake was guiding you there wasn’t any pain in your shoulders at all, but as soon as you started to do it on your own you immediately felt the tightness in them. your face scrunched up as you instantly reverted back to doggy paddling, causing jake and jungwon to laugh.
with full shame, you doggy paddled back to where they stood. “you know… i don’t think swimming is for me, actually.”
“i tried teaching her last year,” jungwon started, amusement tinging his voice, “she literally almost drowned. it’s hopeless…” you glared at him and then rolled your eyes. you’d like to think that if it weren’t for the large waves that day that you would’ve been fine.
jake laughed and you glared at him too, though without as much venom. “it’s a good thing i was there!” he looked at you with the biggest smile on his face and you rolled your eyes at him too. they both laughed again as you tried to think of the quickest way to discard bodies on a public beach.
“we’ll try teaching you again another time,” jake continued. “you’re…” he trailed off trying to find the right word for what he was thinking. “horrible,” jungwon concluded.
“still a novice!” jake quickly corrected. you mumbled out a lame insult to the both of them and walked towards your towel on the beach.
they followed after you, still chuckling, as you wrapped the towel around your soaked body. “it’s not all your fault!” jungwon exclaimed. “your hometown didn’t have an ocean, or even a pool, really. don’t blame yourself!” you scoffed at his cheap attempt to make you feel better and the both of you laughed. your hometown barely had a highschool with a pool. you were never taught to swim in school because all the seniors poured so much gasoline into the pool as a prank that your school had to close off the area and it just never reopened.
coincidentally, that was one of the times jungwon was staying with you and your mom. on a dare, he made you venture into the closed off pool room and you almost didn’t make it out alive. yes, the two of you got in a huge amount of trouble by your parents. you made jungwon do all of your chores for the remaining two months he was there.
“we should probably start heading home though,” said jungwon, “i accidentally broke mom’s sculpture while helping auntie move in her stuff and might’ve insinuated that it was your fault…” your eyes widened as you slowly turned to him. he scratched the back of his head guiltily.
“what?!” you nearly shouted.
“yeah…”
you ran your hands down your face as you turned to jake. “i’ll see you later,” you sighed, moving into his open arms for a hug. “or maybe i won’t after this,” you added suddenly.
“i’ll see you later,” jake repeated as he laughed.
as you and jungwon walked off—more like ran since you were currently trying to smother him in the sand—he kept looking behind you and laughing to himself. you caught him the act again just as the two of you were about to leave the boardwalk. he looked behind the two of you, shook his head a little, and laughed. “what?” you asked him. he hummed in question at your response. “what’s so funny?” you continued, looking behind you as well. you couldn’t tell what could possibly be making him laugh.
“oh, nothing.” jungwon looked behind him again. you nudged him with your elbow, trying to get him to confess.
jungwon laughed again. “jake’s been staring at you this entire time with the fondest, most lovesick puppy look i’ve ever seen. i don’t think he moved from that spot or even blinked since we walked away.”
you whipped your head around and looked around until you saw him. indeed, jungwon was right. you smiled to yourself and gave him a little wave. the smile on jake’s face grew as he waved back.
“gross,” jungwon commented as the two of you turned out of jake’s sight.
jake had, once again, put himself in the position where he was forced to listen about sunghoon’s recent victim’s complaints about their relationship. ever since he met you, he questioned how he ever found any of this entertaining. listening to sunghoon go on and on about the girls he wronged just made him feel exhausted—and guilty. jake couldn’t even begin to imagine how the girls he fucked over must’ve felt. the only thing he could come close to was the image of your heartbroken face the day you left him a year ago.
he never wanted to see that face ever again.
“she wanted me to fuck her—i fucked her. i told her not to expect a relationship out of all of this—now she’s crying about how i was dragging her along!” sunghoon ranted to jake as they made their way down to the boardwalk. sunghoon turned to him with an exasperated expression, “i don’t know how more clear i can get!”
jake pulled the whistle from his shorts and put the lanyard around his neck. “have you ever thought of being in a committed relationship with someone?” he asked sunghoon. jake adjusted his lifeguarding outfit as they got closer to the boardwalk.
sunghoon made a face. “dude, be serious. i’m young! i’ll settle down with someone when i’m, like, thirty or whatever.”
rolling his eyes, jake laughed at sunghoon’s reluctance to commit to someone. “if you find anyone willing to be with you that you haven’t fucked over by then.” the two of them laughed and stepped onto the boardwalk. it wasn’t as busy of a day today, which jake was thankful for.
“alright, i gotta go. my shift’s about to start,” jake said and turned to sunghoon. jake clasped sunghoon’s hand and gave him a quick pat on the back.
sunghoon nodded his head over to the lifeguard who was coming off duty—jay. jake tried not to roll his eyes. “incoming, you know how he is,” sunghoon said. “see ya, man.”
they went on their separate paths and jake walked to where jay was so they could switch. jay looked over from where he was grabbing his towel off the elevated chair ladder. jay gave a tight smile to jake, which already made jake’s blood boil. the only thing he could think about when he looked at him was how close the two of you seemed that night at the beach party.
as jay cleared his things for jake, he tried to make small talk to make the tension less awkward and heavy. “have you heard y/n is in back in town? for good?” jay asked. why was he asking him about you?
jake tried to not let his fist meet jay’s face again.
he tried not to be possessive over you, especially since the two of you weren’t even together again yet. and he wasn’t one to try and keep you from your friends, but jay was a whole different story. jake tried to not let the jealousy seep into his voice, “yeah, duh. i’m the first one she saw.”
“hm,” jay hummed as he threw his bag over his shoulder.
what was that supposed to mean? jake side eyed him. he was the first one you saw when you landed, right? jake would absolutely recoil into himself if he wasn’t. surely it wasn’t jay who you saw first, right? jake ignored him and started to set his own stuff down.
“better hope you don’t fuck everything up again, never know who might swoop in and take your place.” there was the jay that jake knew. the asshole under this whole ‘nice guy’ act he had been playing.
jake turned fully to him. “who? you?”
jake almost laughed in his face. jay couldn’t be serious, but he promised you he would try his hardest to not let there be any drama this summer. even if his fingers itched to wipe that slight smug smirk off jay’s face.
jay just shrugged. “could be, who knows? she’s very likable and very beautiful. everywhere she goes she attracts the stare of some guy. and i would say that you know girls don’t like to be treated like garbage, but with your track record that clearly isn’t obvious to you. you already almost lost her for good once.”
jake’s anger boiled over completely and he squeezed his eyes shut for a second to try and calm himself. it did nothing. jake wryly laughed and stepped up to jay. “so you think you can take her from me? you?” jake laughed again. “i’d like to see you try. incase it wasn’t obvious—she’s in love with me, not you. don’t you hate being a pale imitation?”
jake wanted to bring up every way that he had bested jay—down to the smallest thing, such as being able to tie his shoes before him. he would always be the better man. and even if jake wasn’t in some aspect, he would make damn sure that at the end of the day he was. jay had nothing on him, you had to see that.
it angered jake that jay was even talking about you this way. in a way that suggested he could get close enough to you for the two of you to be together instead of you and him. ridiculous, it all was. the only thing jay would be is a lesser version of him, constantly chasing after anything he had that he could never have. jake should’ve put him in his place when he had the chance three years ago.
jay’s smug smirk grew. “i don’t have to do anything. all it takes is her finding out the truth about the piece of shit that you really are and the game you like to play. and what’s inept infatuation to true bonding?” jay patted jake on the shoulder and jake harshly glared at him and pulled his shoulder away. “best of luck,” jay said in a low voice before walking away.
as jake climbed up to his post, the heat of the sun was nothing to the scalding anger inside him. he knew one thing for sure—luck would not be on jay’s side if he had anything to do with it.
you and jake were meant to be together, and jay’s hollow words weren’t going to change that.
jay: hey, are you free? jay: cashing in that rain check to hang out.
you were on your way home, but it couldn’t hurt to hang out with jay. the two of you needed to spend more than twenty minutes together anyway and catch up more.
besides, the picture of him, jake, and sunghoon suddenly crossed your mind, reminding you that you had forgotten to ask jake about it. maybe jay would give you some insight on why the two of them had bad blood between each other when they were once “swimming buds for life!”
you: haha of course! jay: awesome, meet me at the boardwalk? jay: we can hang out at my place. you: i’ll see you there!
you turned around and walked back down the boardwalk, picking an empty table to wait at in a relatively clear area. the polaroid wouldn’t leave your mind as you speculated what could’ve possibly split them apart.
was it just a mere difference of opinion? or was it the two of them simply growing up and going their separate ways? your mind then replayed their interaction at the beach party last year, how angry they were at just seeing each other. it had to be something deeper than that. perhaps some sort of betrayal?
if that was the case, then who betrayed who? and why?
or maybe the reason was because of this game—the player’s game, as jay mentioned. the one that you have already been a victim of. his words crossed your mind, “there’s no winner in the player’s game. it’s best to know that before it’s too late.”
he had to be a victim of the game too, if he was saying that to you. were jake and sunghoon possibly a factor in it?
before you could speculate any further, jay’s voice shocked you out of your thoughts. “hey,” he smiled, grabbing your attention. you smiled back at him as you stood. “hey!”
as the two of you walked to jay’s house, he must’ve saw that your mind was elsewhere. jay nudged into you slightly as you walked side by side. “you’re quiet today, what’s on your mind?” he asked.
you racked your mind for a way to bring up his and jake’s past friendship subtly, so as to not barge too into their private matters without permission. you decided to try and pose it a different way. “oh, sorry! i just got off work so i’m kind of everywhere right now…” you trailed off, before purposefully perking up as if you just thought of something. “hey, how do you and jake know each other?”
you then internally panicked, thinking that that was maybe too forward, and added, “i’ve been spilling my whole love story with him, and at the beach party the two of you seemed familiar…”
jay’s eyebrows knitted together as he thought over your question. you hoped that you didn’t hit a sensitive subject as you subtly wiped your sweaty palms onto the back of your jean shorts. “we use to be friends—best friends,” jay started, “and on the swim team together back in highschool. him and his friends were just really shitty, so i decided to distance myself from them for my own good.”
you nodded along at his words, trying to place them in the puzzle board in your mind. jay’s answer was vague, but at least it was something—a start. you’d just have to get your answers out of him and jake whenever plausible.
a house that you assumed was his came up into view as the two of you continued walking. “so how did you get involved with jake? i know i kind of already asked you this before, but i’m still curious.” jay guided you towards the house as he spoke.
you told him about you and jungwon swimming in the ocean and how jungwon left to go get something to eat. about how you then mistakenly went further out despite not knowing to swim and how the waves kept beating you down. then finally about how jake had come and saved you.
jay gave you an incredulous look as he held open the gate to his backyard for you. you nodded in confirmation and his shock only grew. “i’m gonna have to teach you how to swim, then!” he exclaimed.
you looked around his backyard. he had a large in-ground pool with a nice patio set up filled with lounge chairs, tables, and an outside bar. jay’s backyard was absolutely beautiful.
“apparently i’m a bad student, but it’s a deal!” you joked and jay laughed, leading you to where the lounge chairs were by the pool.
“show me what you got! you can’t be that bad at swimming.” jay then suddenly stripped off his shirt, leaving him in swim trunks. your eyes widened and surveyed the upper half of his body. jay slunk into the pool, going underwater for a few seconds, and surfaced. he slicked back his now wet hair and looked up at you expectantly. “well?” he chuckled.
you laughed, half of it full of shock and the other half full of nervousness, and stood from the chair. you began taking off your tank top and shorts as jay swam away from where you stood. once you were done, you dipped a toe into the water, face scrunching up at the coldness, and slid in completely. you shivered slightly as you slowly walked to where jay stood in the center of the shallow end of the pool.
jay motioned for you to swim a little and you ducked down until your chin touched the water. “jake taught me for a little bit last week, but it didn’t really stick,” you said as you swam around a little and showed off what you learned from him. you felt jay’s eyes on you as you swam and it made you nervous about your swimming form.
“well i’m a much better teacher than jake.”
you didn’t know how to respond to that, and you didn’t get the chance since jay swam up to you. jay’s fingers trail over your arms, positioning them as he told you how to move them effectively. he then had you swim around his pool more to see what else you needed to work on.
jay’s eyebrows were raised and he looked like he was holding back a laugh. “i told you i was bad!” you exclaimed, sulking down into the water as you swam to him.
“not bad, just…” jay trailed off and you quirked an eyebrow teasingly at him, “just…” jay laughed, not able to finish his sentence and you pushed him.
“see!” you laughed.
“it’s okay, we can fix it.” jay then came closer to you, instructing you to hold out your arms. he came up behind you, his chest almost pressing against your back as his hands slid down your arms. he began to move them in a swimming motion.
“this is the motion you want your arms to do—straighten your fingers more, you don’t want a cupping motion,” jay spoke. his hands moved to your shoulders as you continued moving your arms, moving them backwards and forwards and then down to your waist to do the same.
you heart rate picked up from just how close he was to you, his hands all over you, and his voice next to your ear. your breath hitched lowly as his hands moved to your hips. of course you noticed just how handsome jay was—you noticed when you first surfaced from the water and he scared you—but seeing it all up close was something different. being this close to him made you feel nervous, and it felt a little wrong, too.
you knew that you and jake weren’t together, but being this close to someone else after being so close to him felt a little dirty. like you were cheating on him in some way even though you knew that wasn’t true. it also—deep down inside you—excited you, being this close to another guy.
jay moved around your body until he was to the side of you. his eyes moved from his hands that left your hips and up your body and the way that it moved until his eyes locked on yours. a satisfied smile crossed his features. “just like that, you got it,” jay praised. you inhaled sharply at the way his praise went straight down to the pit of your stomach.
you hoped that your body’s reaction to him came off as nervousness. following his guidance, you gave a small leap as you swam around in a circle in the shallow end of his pool. you did another lap before swimming back to jay. he clapped a couple times as you reached him, a proud smile on his face. “i told you i was a good teacher!”
he grabbed your bare waist as you stilled and your eyes widened a fraction more than they already were. “next time, though, make sure you use your hips more. it makes the whole movement more smooth.”
the feelings inside you made you feel extremely guilty. jay was simply just trying to teach you how to swim, yet your mind was on anything but that. even now, with his hands sliding down to your hips briefly as he finished speaking, he was so close to you that you were practically chest to chest.
dumbly, you looked at him and into his intense stare, breathing hard. you nodded at his previous sentence, though you weren’t actually sure what he said to you. jay smiled, voice softer, “you did so good! you’ll be a pro in no time!”
all you could do was nod again.
there was then silence between the two of you, and this time you were sure that jay could feel the tension. the two of you held each other’s stare, unbreaking. suddenly, jay’s gaze flicked down to your lips and then back up to your eyes. you inhaled deeply as the look in his eyes shifted.
your phone then went off, the sound of a received text message seemingly louder than it ever was before. you and jay jumped apart, the tension in the air turning awkward as jay shifted away from you slightly. “uh, i’ll go get us something to drink…” he trailed off.
“oh—um, yeah…” you muttered awkwardly.
you both got out of the pool and you used the towel hanging off the back of the lounge chair to dry off before checking the message you received.
jake: hey, where are you? are you off work yet? you: yeah! i’ve been hanging out with jay. why?
the guilt ate away at you even more. you knew it was ridiculous—you didn’t do anything wrong, the two of you just swam around together. but everything just felt weird and off now, like it was a secret you now had to hide from jake. his next message didn’t make you feel any better either.
jake: hanging out with jay?! why are you with him? you: he’s my friend? and i haven’t really seen him since i got here�� you: is that a problem?
jake didn’t immediately answer and it made you speculate about the friendship he and jay once had. your phone didn’t ping with his text message until right as jay was coming through the sliding glass doors with two cups in his hands. “i got us some lemonade, i hope that’s okay!” jay said, handing you one of the cups.
jake: no, not a problem at all.
instead of swimming more, you and jay decided to chill outside of the pool and soak in some of the summer sun and talk. the more you talked, the more the awkward tension that was between the two of you slowly dissipated and talking to jay again was easy.
the weird feeling inside of you didn’t disappear, though. as you talked, your eyes couldn’t help but be attached to jay. the way the sun beamed off his drying skin and how he kept pushing the long, damp strands of his hair out of his face. the way his whole face lit up when you said something funny and a smile broke out into a laugh. it made your heart race.
suddenly, it finally clicked in your brain. you were attracted to him.
guilt poured into you even more and you started to shyly avoid his gaze. if jay noticed the sudden shift in you—which you hoped he didn’t—he didn’t mention it. you made sure you eyes were focused on anything but him as you talked.
you tried categorizing jay in your mind as strictly a friend, but even then it felt like he didn’t fit into the box. like he belonged somewhere between “friend” and “potential romantic interest” and that alarmed you even more. so you did the only thing you could think of at the moment to metaphorically shove him back into the “friend” box.
“you know, you’re like my bestfriend, right?” you laughed, making sure to make eye contact with him.
jay’s smile grew. “i’m your bestfriend?” he teased, leaned forward on the lounge chair towards you. “write it in stone. get the friendship bracelets out!” a small sigh of relief escaped you and you laughed, glad that he didn’t give you a weird look or anything.
jay stood from his chair, a hand at his chest, “i feel like i have to say a speech now or something.”
you immediately waved your hands in the air in front of you. “no!” you dragged the vowel out, “that is not necessary!” jay laughed harder.
you checked the time on you phone and sighed. “i should probably head home now… my mom’s probably wondering where i got off to after work…” you stood to your feet, smile faltering on your face.
“no issue! ill walk you,” jay said.
you gave him another shy smile. it was probably best that you didn’t spend more time with jay at this moment until you sorted yourself out. you didn’t know whether it was that your emotions were still everywhere from the move and you haven’t quite settled in yet, or what, but you had to get it together and fast.
“oh—don’t worry about it!” you quickly said, “i have to stop down by the boardwalk and pick up something for my mom.” it was a lie, but jay was standing so close to you that it was all you had.
“okay!” jay replied. he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into a hug, shaking you a bit. “we’ll hang out some more sometime later, bestfriend.”
you laughed, hugging him back and ignoring your racing heart. you looked to the sky at the way the sun passed through the leaves of the trees. it was a little past noon and you were ready to get out of your bathing suit.
jay walked you to his backyard gate and opened it for you, following you out. “see ya!” you waved at him. he repeated your words, waving goodbye.
just as you turned away from him, a rundown van that honestly looked on its last life pulled up to the walkway. behind you, jay scoffed and you looked at the oncomer curiously as you kept walking. you heard jay’s footsteps behind you walk towards the van.
as you turned towards the path to the boardwalk, you heard jay say, “heeseung, when are you gonna get rid of that beat up fucking van? shit is falling apart.” who you could only assume was heeseung replied, “don’t talk about betsy like that!”
you laughed to yourself as you continued on your way away from jay’s house.
as you were walking, completely in your own world, you felt an arm wrap around your waist. you nearly jumped out of your skin as you turned and screeched. jake immediately held his hands up, eyes wide and eyebrows raised.
“i’m sorry, i’m sorry! i didn’t mean to scare you!”
you let out the biggest sigh of relief before hitting him on the chest. “asshole! this is, like, the second time you’ve scared me nearly to death!”
jake laughed before wrapping his arms back around your waist, pulling you into him. he pressed a kiss to your cheek and smiled down at you. “i tried calling your name, but you weren’t listening! what’s on your mind?”
you shook your head slightly and shrugged a little. you were just glad to be in his arms again. “nothing,” you replied, “just a little spaced out, i guess.”
jake hummed and the two of you continued walking together. you noticed how jake had subtly guided you away from the path to the boardwalk and onto one you remembered from when you first landed here—his house.
this was your chance. with jay only giving you a vague answer about their history, maybe jake would give you more insight. you looked at him, “hey, jake?”
jake hummed again, brows slightly drawn together as he smiled at you. it was time to bite the bullet. “you and jay use to be bestfriends, right? what happened between the two of you?” you asked. jake’s smile fell and he looked down to the ground before looking forward. there was almost what seemed to be a flash of anger that crossed his features at the mention of jay’s name.
“uh…” jake trailed, tucking a stray strand of his hair that wasn’t already tied up behind his ear. “i was a really shitty person back then. i hurt a lot of people—did a lot of things that i now regret.”
that was basically a regurgitated version of what jay had already told you, it wasn’t enough. you needed to know more. “yeah, i know that already. but what did you do to him that you guys aren’t friends anymore?” you said, trying to make yourself more clear.
“why do you want to know so bad?” jake asked, slight annoyance in his tone as he looked back to you. “did jay say something to you?” his arm around your waist tightened.
jake had never gotten annoyed at you, so you felt the need to defend yourself. “no, but i saw that picture on your wall with you, him, and sunghoon. ‘swimming buds for life!’” you sarcastically mocked as you did air quotes. “and you freaked out when you heard that i was hanging out with him. should jay have said something?”
the annoyance in jake’s features only grew and he rolled his eyes at the mention of jay’s name. you didn’t understand why he was acting this way over a simple question. you told him you wanted no drama, and you thought he understood that. so why won’t he tell you what happened between him and jay? you thought that he would start being more transparent with you after last summer.
you didn’t realize that you were already at his house until he pushed the door open and took your hand in his to drag you up the stairs to his bedroom. “it’s not important,” jake said, pushing his bedroom door open. you followed him through, shutting the door behind you to muffle the noise. “but it is!” you insisted, voice raising as you stopped in your tracks.
jake turned around so he faced you, running his hands through the hair that escaped his ponytail that he sported before running them down his face in frustration. “he’s my friend and you’re—” you cut yourself off, sighing deeply and sitting on the edge of his bed. “why can’t you just give me a straight answer? what is it? what is it about me and him being friendly that has you acting like this?”
you looked at the way jake started to pace in front of you with a worried expression. was what happened between the two of them so bad that it couldn’t even be uttered? surely not, right?
“i—i just can’t fucking stand him! and i can't stand you with him,” jake began to ramble, face twisted into an expression you couldn’t quite read. “you not with me. i can’t stand how he spun all of this to seem like he is the innocent one in all of this—like he wasn’t part of the game too! like he wasn’t a shitty person too!”
jake continued, voice raising, but never reaching a yell, “and i can't stand—couldn’t possibly fathom losing you again because of him.” jake came to stand before you, desperately looking at you.
you shook your head in confusion. “what are you talking about—losing me? how would you lose me?”
jake slumped down next to you, leaning over to run his hands through his hair that had completely fallen out of his ponytail now. you glanced around his room, noting the pictures of the two of you hanging up on his walls that weren’t there before. he had replaced some of the previous pictures with one of the two of you. just then, a lightbulb illuminated in your head. “jake… are you… jealous?” you asked him quietly, brows drawn together.
“yes!” he exasperatedly shouted, falling back onto his bed and rubbing his eyes.
you turned, “you have nothing to be jealous about? jay and i are just friends!”
jake shook his head, eyes still covered. “you’re gonna find out how absolutely shitty i was in the past and how he’s so perfect and want nothing to do with me.” jake uncovered his eyes and looked at you sullenly. “i don’t know what i would do with myself if you wanted nothing to do with me.”
you laid down next to him so you were face to face and grabbed his hand. absentmindedly, jake rubbed his thumb on the back of your hand. you looked at jake and his kicked puppy expression, “you don’t have anything to worry about, jake. nothing.”
you looked at him firmly to make sure your words were really sinking in. you may have found jay attractive, but jake is the one who kept you up at night. who you can’t stop thinking about no matter how hard you try—who you spent a whole year thinking about. the one who you graciously let hold your heart.
“there’s no competition between you and jay,” you added in a low voice.
jake seemed to relax and the line between his brows smoothened. “a girl,” jake suddenly said. you gave him a confused look.
“he was in love with this girl, but she liked me instead of him. when he found out things didn’t go over so well… split the whole swim team in half with people choosing sides. it was a loss for both of us.” jake looked down at your intertwined hands, voice quiet.
“well i’m not her,” you stated. “you won’t lose me.”
jake looked up at you and you scooted closer to him, lips mere centimeters apart. “you won’t,” you repeated, pressing your lips to his. jake’s hand raised to cup your cheek as his lips fell in sync with yours. the two of you stayed like that for a moment, the kiss growing more passionate and desperate as time went on.
you straddled him, lips still attached to his, and instantly jake’s hands came to your hips. pulling away, you breathed, “let me make you feel good this time.”
furrowing his brows, jake looked up at you with confusion. “you always make me feel good,” you started, crawling backwards until your hands reached the band of his loose shorts. “let me return the favor.”
you crawled all the way off of his bed and sat on your knees between his legs, your hands resting neatly in your lap. jake sat up, eyes widening slightly as he stared hard down at you. you looked up at him with big, hesitant doe eyes.
“you cannot look up at me like that, pretty.” a shy smile grew at his words and at the way you saw the tent in his shorts grow.
“will you teach me how?” you asked him. you’ve never given anyone a blowjob in your life, you barely even gave a handjob. nerves flooded you at the fact that you would possibly do something wrong and that would be the end of it. or that you didn’t do it well enough and it was just disappointing.
you ran your hands up jake’s thighs and played with the drawstring of his shorts. jake screwed his eyes shut and nodded a little, inhaling sharply before opening his eyes again. “are you sure?” he asked you, worry tinging his features. “you don’t have to—and i don’t want to hurt you.”
“i want to,” you stated firmly, fingers hooking onto the band of his shorts now. you tugged lightly at it.
“alright,” jake breathed out. “don’t do anything you aren’t ready for.”
you nodded impatiently, eagerly pulling down his shorts and boxers in response. jake lifted his hips so they slid off all of the way, his heavy cock springing free from its restraints. you took his cock in your hands and jake lightly put a hand on the back of your head to signal you to stop.
“go slow, and don’t try to take more than you can handle to try and please me,” he said seriously. “i don’t want you hurting yourself.”
nodding again, you nervously looked at his cock in your hands. you weren’t sure what to do first. wrap your mouth around him or stroke him first? your grip was feather-light and you looked back up at jake so he could tell you what to do.
he caressed the back of your head comfortingly, “you don’t have to be nervous, baby, it’s just me.” jake gave you a reassuring smile and you gave him a small nervous one back. “you don’t have to hold it so lightly either, don’t be afraid to grab it.”
inhaling deeply, you tightened your grip until it was firm, but not too tight that you thought might hurt. jake moaned lightly, his eyes fluttering closed for a brief second. “i-is that good?” you asked worriedly.
jake nodded, inhaling hard. “yes, yes, just like that.” drips of precum slid down the flushed tip of his cock. “now, just move your hands up and down while twisting back and forth a little.”
you did exactly as he said, moving you hands up and down his length while maintaining the grip you already had. your eyes were trained on jake’s face and the way soft moans left his parted lips and his head tilted back more and more.
“good, baby,” jake breathed out heavily. you felt the way his cock practically throbbed in your hands. “when you get to the top, grab harder.”
“harder?” you asked, slightly more worried. your grip was already firm and he wants you to tighten it? jake nodded more, brows knitted together as his eyes squeezed shut, “mhm.” his moans were louder now and his hand that was at your head moved to press down into his mattress with his other hand.
you kept stroking him, his precum making the motion a bit easier. when you got to the flushed tip of his cock, you squeezed down harder. a loud moan left jake’s mouth as his hips bucked up into your hands. “ah fuck,” he groaned under his breath.
you smiled. it was nice to see him twisted in pleasure instead of the other way around. it was especially nice to know that you were the cause of it. that you were making him feel this good. you wondered if this is how he felt when he made you feel this good. it made your skin heat up and arousal pool at your core the more you thought about it and the more he moaned and whimpered for you.
jake tried hard to keep his hips still, but it was as if he physically couldn’t control himself. “can i try my mouth now?” you asked timidly. breathing hard, jake nodded. he looked down at you with hooded, clouded eyes of lust.
you sat up on your knees a bit and leaned forward. you looked down at his reddened mushroom tip and started with some apprehensive kitten licks. above you, jake inhaled sharply. you looked up at him nervously and you saw something shift in his features. his pupils blew wide with lust and his fingers gripped his comforter to keep his hands at his sides.
“slow,” he intrustructed. it came out almost strangled.
hesitantly, you wrapped your mouth around the tip of his cock as if it were a lollipop, sucking your cheeks in a bit. another loud moan was ripped deep from within jake and he threw his head back completely. you pulled your mouth off of him, eyes widening, before preparing yourself to take more of his cock inside your mouth.
you wrapped your mouth around him again, going farther down his thick length before you suddenly gagged. jake’s eyes flew down at you and his hand grabbed the hair at the back of your head to pull you off of him. “are you okay, baby?” he asked, frantic.
you nodded, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand as you looked up at him with watery eyes. his cock in you free hand twitched. you swallowed thickly, “sorry…”
he moved his hand at the back of your head to caress your cheek. “it’s okay, just take it easy. okay?” jake said softly. “okay,” you replied.
inhaling, you took him into your mouth again, this time taking jake’s advice and going slow. you went down inch by inch, stopping before you got the feeling of having to gag again. you wrapped your hands around the rest of his length that you couldn’t fit inside your mouth and applied the same pressure as before.
slowly, you bobbed your head up and down, sucking inwards so your cheeks hollowed. “breathe—” jake spoke before getting cut off by his own moans and whimpers. “…through your nose.”
it must’ve been really difficult for jake, trying to control himself while talking you through what to do at the same time. even now, the more you sucked him off, the more you felt him struggling to still himself so he didn’t potentially hurt you. a part of you wanted him to just let go.
you didn’t even notice the fire in your lungs until he mentioned breathing. so you inhaled through your nose, the tension in your body immediately being relieved even though it took you a few tries to actually breath through your nose and suck at the same time. at the base of his cock, you moved your hands in the same up and down and twisting motion.
jake was practically panting now, knuckles white with the way he gripped his comforter. his moans and whimpers increased and his hips bucked up into your mouth lightly, signaling that he was real close to cumming. “shit,” jake cursed, half of it coming out in a whine.
his hand was at the back of your head again, using your hair to pull your mouth off of him. you kept moving your hands, this time bringing them up further—and squeezing at his tip—to accommodate the lack of your mouth.
you barely got to lean away before his cum was shooting out of him and all over your face and hands. drips of it landed on his thighs and jake fell back on his hands, a loud moan ripping through him as his head flew back. you kept stroking him, the remaining cum dripping down your hands, as you helped him through his high. jake’s hips lazily thrusted up into your hands as he tried to catch his breathing.
once jake was finished, his cock softening in your hands, he sat up to look at you. you looked at him with hesitant doe eyes again and his eyes widened to saucers as he took in the scene in front of him. “was it good?” you asked shyly, worry hanging on the edge of your words. you swear you felt his cock harden.
“perfect. it was perfect, pretty,” jake responded, gently grabbing your chin. you licked your lips and was surprised at the slight salty taste of his cum. jake smiled and chucked a bit, “if you could see yourself from my point of view right now…”
you smiled cheekily at him. “so take a picture and show me.”
that got him hard again.
jake raised an eyebrow at you, his smile turning into a smirk. he leaned down to his shorts pocket and fished out his phone, then he aimed the camera at you and you heard the click of a picture.
he still had his phone aimed at you. you giggled, “do you want me to pose?” jake laughed and you joined him. “if you want,” he smiled.
you lifted his heavy, half hard cock in your hands and placed your tongue at the side of his tip while you stared into the camera. “careful…” jake warned teasingly. “i don’t think i could control myself again.” you smiled before wrapping your lips around him, giggling.
a moan slipped past jake’s lips and you laughed, pulling away. he tossed his phone behind him and raised his brows at you. jake grabbed your arms and pulled you to your feet. “okay, little miss eager… let’s get you cleaned up. i don’t think you want to go walking around with my cum all over your face.”
being back at you and jake’s spot evoked emotions inside you that you weren’t quite ready for. being at your spot and laying under the stars with him caused a whole bigger tidal wave. it made you think of every moment that the two of you had here—good and bad. jake was right, this really is the best place to see the stars.
the last time the two of you watched the stars together, you were tucked into jake’s side, almost cheek to cheek. now the two of you were seperate—the only connection being the brushing together of your arms. you didn’t like how far away he felt, but you weren’t quite sure how to bridge the gap further.
you felt jake’s heavy stare on the side of your face and you looked over at him instead of the stars. you had spent the rest of the day together, roaming around the small town with your phones on record capturing every moment until the two of you ended up here. it felt like the day when you had stumbled into your shared spot and you and jake’s relationship changed forever. you quirked an eyebrow at him as the two of you stared at each other for a moment. you could tell that something was weighing on his mind.
jake exhaled, “i know you wanna take things slow, so i won’t ask you…” his eyes flickered to the stars before focusing on you again. you really appreciated how he was being open with his feelings with you, especially since he told you how difficult it was for him. “but, just know you’re the only one for me. no games, no lies, nothing. i want only you. you’re the only one i’ll ever want.”
you shifted so you were fully facing him, shocked at where this was coming from all of a sudden. you thought you curbed his earlier jealousy—maybe it was something else? “is this because of what hana said a few weeks ago? cause i don’t believe a single word out of her mouth. i know how you feel about me, i know that you aren’t a player anymore.”
“yes and no…” jake trailed. “i just want to make sure that you know. whenever you want to take things to the next level, i’ll be there. i don’t want you to think this is only about the sex for me, ‘cause it isn’t.”
jake then suddenly panicked, waving his hand in between the two of you. “though the sex is great—amazing, even, and i really, really enjoy it! so don’t think—”
you cut him off with a soft laugh, he is so cute when he is flustered. “i know, jake, i know.”
you sat up from the blanket you both are laying on. “turn around!” you tell jake. he smiled and turned towards the blanket while covering his eyes. “don’t look!”
taking a deep breath, you steadied yourself. you thought now was as good as a time to take things to the next level. in the sand you nervously wrote out ‘boyfriend? yes or no’ with check boxes next to ‘yes’ and ‘no.’
you knew you prioritized taking things slow—which you definitely didn’t do—and having jake’s actions speak louder than his words, but you knew what you wanted. you knew the moment you landed here and ran as fast as you could to him. jake is the one that you want—the one that you’ll always want, and his actions have already proven to you that he feels the exact way.
moving to the side a bit, you told him to open his eyes. you took your lip between your teeth as you watched him read your words in the sand. you let out a small sigh of relief when his whole face lit up and he checked the ‘yes’ box immediately. giggling, you climbed into his lap and smashed your lips onto his.
“oh! we should take a picture!” jake perked up. he pulled his phone from his pocket and aimed it towards the words in the sand. “physical memories and all, right? well, not physical, but you know what i mean.” you laughed as he snapped the picture and one of the two of you for good measure.
as jake walks you home, the air between the two of you buzzes—almost glows with the help of the streetlights. your hand is intertwined in his and the world feels like it’s back in order. it’s electrifying—the way you turn and stare up at him just before you step onto your porch. you open your mouth to speak, but jake already knows what the words will be.
just then, the porch light turns on and you quickly look back at it before looking back at him. with a sheepish smile you tell him goodnight. jake’s heart can’t help but swell as he smiles back and kisses you on your cheek. “goodnight, baby,” he murmurs.
jake watches you walk to your porch and disappear into your house—not letting go of his hand until the distance physically breaks the two of you apart. he begins to walk home, thoughts of you flooding his mind. jake is so fond of you that it almost hurts. he’s so in love with you that it actually does.
he’s looking through the pictures and videos you both took today, a giddy smile on his face as he starts to send them to you like you asked earlier. then a thought crosses his mind. is it his jealousy and slight possessiveness creeping in? maybe. but his fingers are already moving before he can stop them.
jake just hopes that jay still has the same number.
attaching the imagine of you asking him to be your boyfriend and the selfie of the two of you, jake presses send. he waits a second before typing the message, “oops, meant to send this to my girlfriend. my bad!”
jay: read, 10:57 P.M.
jake smirks as he slides his phone back in his pocket. he knew that he was rubbing it in jay’s face, but he honestly couldn’t care less. how dare he try to come between the two of you? jake wouldn’t be surprised if he only started talking to you so he could get one up on him. pitiful, really.
it didn’t matter anymore, because now you were jake’s girlfriend—and you were all that mattered to him.
“you just can’t help yourself, huh?” a voice said behind you.
you were in the middle of wrapping up your shift—cleaning the counter and tidying up for the next person’s shift. turning, confusion written all over your face, you were then face to face with hana. anger coiled her features into a scowl and she looked almost… paranoid? mascara clumped below her lashes and she honestly looked a mess. your brows knitted together at her words. what was she on about now?
“jake is mine,” she said with fevered passion. you just rolled your eyes and continued tidying up, opting to ignore her. that didn’t stop hana. she slammed her hands down on the counter, leaning forward. you raised an eyebrow at her. “first jake, now jay—you just can’t help going after my sloppy seconds, can’t you?” hana continued, almost shouting. she was borderline hysterical and you genuinely started to get worried.
“what? what are you talking about, hana?” you asked, turning fully to her.
your response only seemed to piss hana off even more than she was. red-hot anger boiled behind her eyes and she was attracting the attention of people passing by, but she either didn’t notice or didn’t care. “don’t ‘what’ me. you know exactly what i’m fucking talking about! what do they even see in you?”
you honestly had no words. hana stormed off, giving you one last glare. you stood in place frozen, rag hanging limply from your fingers.
the vibration of your phone knocked you back to your senses and you quickly finished tidying up. you clocked out and on the way home you opened your phone to see what the vibration was.
jake: lunch at your house with your mom today is still on right? you: yup! jake: see you there, pretty.
you pushed open your front door, gaining your mom’s attention. she must’ve walked through the door minutes prior since she was surrounded by grocery bags. you helped her bring them into the kitchen and unload them.
“so… you and that jake boy, huh?” your mother asked you innocently, putting stuff away into the fridge. you were next to her putting stuff into cabinets. “yeah,” you said sheepishly, “we’re back together now.”
she hummed, quiet for a moment. “i know last year the two of you had problems that hindered you from wanting to come back here—problems that i see have been resolved now. i can tell that he does really care about you, honey, so don’t be afraid to jump feet first.” she looked at you from where she stood in front of the fridge, a spacey look in her eyes. you can tell she was thinking about your father.
“thanks, mom,” you smiled at her. she snapped out of her haze, smiling back at you.
“and then—” you were cut off by a moan pushing itself out of your mouth, your back arching slightly off your bed. “and then she was just shouting like a maniac! the whole time i’m trying to figure out what she’s on about while everyone around us is staring.”
another soft moan left your parted lips and your fingers grabbed tightly onto your blankets. your brows drew together as your mind started to get hazy. you were just about to lose tract of what you were saying before the image of hana’s hysterical and angry face popped into your mind. “are you even listening to me?” you asked, flicking the blanket off of you.
jake looked up at you, lips attached to your core and fingers buried deep inside you. he hummed in question and it sent shockwaves throughout you—making your hips buck up into his mouth and your eyes flutter shut briefly. you pouted and jake pulled away from you, pulling his fingers out of you—the wetness coating them—and resting his hand on your inner thigh so your legs stayed apart.
“baby, i do not care about hana,” jake said. you scoffed and looked up at your ceiling, old glow in the dark stars sticking to it. jake chuckled and crawled up your body so you were face to face. “who cares what she said! she’s delusional and crazy—ignore her.”
you sighed and jake laughed more. “now, do you want me to continue or do you wanna rant more?” he asked you. you pouted more at him and he kissed your lips.
there was a knock at your door and you and jake panicked and he ended up falling off your bed and to the ground next to it with a loud thud. “one second!” you called as you pulled your panties back from the side and adjusted your skirt so it wasn’t halfway up your stomach.
turning to jake, you put a finger to your lips, motioning for him to stay silent. you went to your door and opened it up just enough to show your body. “what was that?” your mom asked you.
you furrowed your brows, pretending like it wasn’t jake falling on his ass, before acting like you realized what she was talking about. “oh, that thud? it was my suitcase—i still haven’t fully unpacked yet…”
your mom tsked at you and handed you a dress. “found one of my old dresses while cleaning out grandma’s closet, i thought you might want it to wear to summer splash.” your eyes widened at you took it from her, a thankful smile forming on your face.
“it’s beautiful, mom,” you spoke as you examined it. she smiled before leaving you to unpack.
you laid the dress on the chair next to your closet before turning to jake. you held out a hand as you waited for your mom’s footsteps to retreat completely before rushing to him and helping him to his feet. the two of you smiled sheepishly at each other.
“i think i should go,” jake said in a low voice. he wrapped his arms around your waist and buried his face in your neck. the tips of his ponytail tickled your cheek. jake pressed a kiss to your neck, making you shiver, before looking back at you. “we can finish this later.”
heat rushed to your face and you nodded, fighting the urge to cover your face from him. jake’s smile turned to a half-smirk. he started to walk towards your door but you pulled him back towards you by his hand, a wild look on your face. “you can’t just go out the front door!” you whisper-yelled.
jake’s brows furrowed. “why not?” he whispered back.
you gave him an incredulous look. “jake, i snuck you in here,” you said before pointing to your window. “you were supposed to leave after lunch… you’re gonna have to use the window.” jake looked at the window and then at you, unmoving.
pulling him to the window, you opened it and the warm summer nighttime air hit you. you turned to jake and motioned to the window. jake raised his brows. he then intertwined your hands and rested his forehead against yours for a moment before kissing you gently.
“i’m going to be coming through your window all of the time now, i hope you realize that,” jake said lowly. you laughed softly at him, “i’ll leave it unlocked for you then.”
jake leaned on your open window, looking down at the grass below before turning to you. “you’re still my date to the summer splash event, right?” you rolled your eyes playfully at him, “duh! of course i am!”
jake smiled and kissed your cheek before stepping over the ledge of the window. he started climbing down before he unceremoniously fell on his ass again. you gasped and shouted in a low, worried voice, “are you okay?!”
jake gave you a pained smile and a thumbs up before getting up and shaking himself off. you watched as the living room light turned on. you and jake froze for a second, his eyes darting up to yours, before he took off—waving at you as he ran down the street.
you held in the urge to laugh as you quietly shut your window again, making sure to leave it unlocked. you were sure you were gonna hear about the “strange noises” tomorrow. you pulled your phone out and texted jake.
you: very smooth. jake: i know, i’m such a pro!
jake attached a blurry picture of him smiling while running that finally got you to laugh.
[ CHANGEOVER — THE SUMMER SUN SETS EARLY ] 𓇼 and a cold wind sweeps up the sea.
jake laughed—the vibrations traveling throughout your body as you laid on his chest—and scrolled to another video on his phone for the two of you to watch together. he had come through your window like he promised and the two of you had spent the night in the same bed. now the both of you were in the bare bones of your pajamas—you in a thin tank top and panties and him just in his boxers—the morning of the summer splash charity event.
after a couple more videos, jake shut his phone off and looked down at you on top of him. “as much as i enjoy you sitting on my cock, we should both probably get ready… today is gonna be a long day.”
you snuggled deeper into his bare chest. the simple feeling of being stuff so full already had your mind cloudy. “but i’m so comfortable!” you mumbled, glancing up at him. jake smirked.
jake’s hands trailed down to your waist, his touch sending a shiver down your spine. “hm, you’re so comfortable… how comfortable?” he asked, voice low. you sat up fully, a flirty smile crossing your features. you rested your hands on his chest.
“very comfortable.”
“let’s see, then.” jake’s smirk grew as his hands trailed down to your hips, head tilting to the side. his hands squeezed your hip slightly and you were practically already dripping.
you started rolling your hips, using your hands on his chest as leverage. both of your breathing started to get heavier. “like this?” you asked innocently, lifting your hips a little and dropping them again as you rolled them. jake’s eyes rolled back and his head fell back on your headboard.
“yes… exactly like that,” he breathed, voice almost hoarse.
the more you moved, the louder your moans grew and the cloudier your head got. at some point jake had to hold his hand over your mouth to muffle them. “shh, pretty,” he shushed in a husky voice. “i’m sure you don’t want someone to come in here and see us.”
you shook your head as you kept riding him. “f-feels so good, i can’t stop myself.” jake’s response was to kiss you instead, muffling your shared moans with each other’s mouths. he bit down softly on your lower lip and smirked at the way you moaned against his mouth.
the fabric between the two was seemingly too much for jake. before you could even chase his lips, your tank top was off and his lips were on your skin and his hands were exploring the new access to your body. you bit down hard on your bottom lip as his plump lips left love bites all over your skin.
a loud whimper left your mouth when jake adjusted your position so that he could easily fuck up into you. you buried your face in his neck to silence yourself, hoping that the loud sounds of skin slapping against skin didn’t alert any of your family members.
“f-fuck—” jake swore, voice stuttering as he suddenly stilled inside you. warm cum spilled into you and filled you even more. you looked up from jake’s neck through hooded eyes and watched the way his eyes fluttered closed.
jake exhaled heavily, his forehead resting against yours as his cum dripped out of you and down his hard cock. his lips sloppily connected with yours as his hips started fucking up into you again.
your brows harshly drew together as your moan was muffled by jake’s mouth. your nails dug into his shoulders and your body started to shake as each wave of pleasure hit you one by one like a tsunami.
“feels good, baby?” jake whispered near your ear, voice husky. you could barely answer him because if you did you would end up shrieking. all you could do was nod weakly as high-pitched whimpers and whines escaped past your lips.
jake swore again when you tightly clenched down onto him, body shaking like a leaf and nails so deep in his shoulders that you weren’t surprised if you drew blood. suddenly the floodgates opened and you were cumming harder than you ever did before as your body fully collapsed on top of jake.
stars swirled in your eyes as jake helped you through your orgasm, kissing your cheek and shoulder comfortingly as he rubbed circles onto your back. both of you were covered in a sheen of sweat and breathing heavily, the point where the two of you connected sticky with your mixed cum.
once your head wasn’t on cloud nine anymore, you shakily sat up. you gave jake a hazy smile and giggled. jake pulled you closer to him, chuckling, before he kissed you softly. “we might be in trouble,” he said in a low voice, accent heavy. you giggled again, ignoring the way your pussy throbbed from his voice alone.
you pulled away from him, almost fully naked body on full display for him. you both were definitely gonna have to throw away your respective panties and boxers after this. jake looked down at the mess you both created before caressing your waist with his thumb. there was that fondness in his eyes again. “you’re so pretty like this…” he trailed and you hid your face with your hands, heat rushing to your face as you shyly smiled.
jake pulled away your hands. “my pretty girl,” he said affectionately. you lifted your hips and pulled yourself off of his cock, more cum spilling out of you. you leaned back down to kiss him. “we should get ready now,” he said, pressing another chaste kiss to your lips.
you hummed before throwing his famous smirk at him. jake quirked an eyebrow, the corners of his mouth raising. “getting ready can wait another thirty minutes,” you murmured before trailing kisses down his body. jake’s breath hitched and his eyes fluttered shut when your kissed stopped right where the band of his boxers were.
your smirk grew. it was nice to know that you had the same effect on him that he had on you. that you could get him all worked up so easily like he sat in the palm of your hand. it made you feel on top of the world. “we aren’t done yet,” you said, grabbing his cum-covered cock into your hand as you began to stroke slowly.
a whimper left jake’s parted lips as his eyes cracked open. the corners of his mouth were still raised, “i’m gonna make you eat your words.”
it’s safe to say that you and jake were a little late showing up to the summer splash charity event. all around the beach and boardwalk were people participating in various contests and competitions to raise money for the sheltered animals in town. you were in one of your mom’s old dresses—it was so beautiful and formal that you felt a little awkward and restricted despite its flowiness—and jake had on a nice suit that matched your dress. the two of you looked stunning, if you did say so yourself.
at some point jake got pulled away from you by his friends to participate in a competition and you wandered the boardwalk looking at all the competing people. you could see why this was held every year, everyone was buzzing with energy and there were smiles all around.
“hey… y/n?” you turned to see jay coming up to you. you smiled at him.
“oh! hey, jay!” you said, turning to face him. he had a serious expression on his face and your eyes knitted together in worry. “what’s wrong?” you asked him. jay inhaled deeply and a flood of words poured from his mouth.
“listen, i know you may think jake is the one, but he isn’t the saint you think he is.” jay gave you a firm stare. you looked away, sighing to yourself. “jay…” you trailed.
jay cut you off. “i have to say this before it’s too late. i like you, y/n. i really like you. and i’d never put you through all the things he has—lead you on or fill your head with lies and half-truths. if you’d give me the chance, i could show you that we’re a better match.” you opened your mouth to speak but he cut you off again. “think about it…”
jay then left you standing dumbfounded and completely confused on the boardwalk.
later that night, there was a venue the coordinators booked where people could dance and mingle with each other over drinks. you and jake were on the dance floor, way past tipsy, but not quite as drunk yet. a slow song started to play and the two of you swayed side to side before jake spun you.
you smiled adoringly up at him and he mirrored your expression. you leaned closer to him and leaned your head against his chest as the two of you continued to sway. “you do know how much i like you,” you said to him, loud enough for it to be heard over the music but low enough that only his ears could hear and a bit slurred. you felt jake chuckle as his arms wrapped tightly around your waist.
“i do,” he replied. “you do know how much i like you, right?” you laughed and pulled away slightly to look up at him. you pressed your lips against his softly.
there was something else hanging in the air between you that you couldn’t quite put your finger on. maybe your head was too misty from the alcohol, but it felt like it was on the tip of both of your tongues. you didn’t linger on it, mind distracted by the sudden need to use the restroom.
pulling away from jake, you told him this and made your way to the restrooms. jake watched you leave, a small smile on his face. his face dropped when he saw a sneering hana follow after you. in a quick second decision he decided to go after the both of you.
when jake caught up to the two of you, it felt like he was walking directly into a car crash. “the year you were gone he was with me!” he heard hana say as she shoved her phone in your face, swiping through various pictures. confusion spread through him. what was she talking about now?
your brows were knitted together as you took the phone from her, looking through all the pictures of her and jake. even with your clouded mind, you didn’t believe hana at first, but ask you kept scrolling you weren’t quite sure anymore. jake’s hair was almost the same length as it was now and when you checked the dates it said it was from a year ago.
“mhm!” hana said, and it felt like she dug her claws into your heart and ripped it out. “as soon as you got on that plane he came to me!” your heart dropped and you turned to jake, hurt written all over your face. you felt absolutely crushed.
“is this true?” you asked him, voice trembling.
after everything he said to you—he went back to her? when he said that nothing happened between them and nothing will ever again… was that all just a lie? did he take you as a fool again? you couldn’t believe this.
“i love you, you know id never go back to her when this whole time i’ve been waiting for you.” jake stepped towards you, still confused about what was happened. all he knew was that he didn’t want to see that hurt look on your face—he couldn’t take it. you quickly took a step back from him and he practically shriveled up and died.
in the background the coordinators were announcing how much money was raised tonight, but you could barely hear them with your heart beating in your ears. “but you went back to her,” you spoke, voice raising.
jake gave you an incredulous look. “you’re telling me you believe what’s coming out of her mouth right now? seriously? whatever she showed you—they’re fake. she probably edited them.”
tears welled up in your eyes, your emotions everywhere from that stupid alcohol you decided to drink. “i don’t know what to believe anymore! it’s always fucking something with you and i’m tired of it!” you exclaimed. you wanted to wrap your arms around yourself and disappear.
jake pleaded with you, “listen to me. listen to what i’m telling you! it’s not true.” he took another step towards you and this time you let him.
seemingly out of thin air, jay appeared next to the three of you, turning his attention to jake. “why don’t you tell her about what happened between the three of us, jake.” he motioned with a finger between him, jake, and hana. your brows drew deeper together as you looked between him. what is jay talking about?
“yeah, jake!” hana chimed it, a sickly sweet smile curling up the corners of her lips. “tell her.”
you looked back at jake and the bewildered look on his face as jay and hana pounced on him. jay then looked at you, “well, if you won’t tell y/n then i will.”
jay stepped closer to you and jake and wrapped an arm around jake’s shoulders. “you wanna know the real reason why jake and i aren’t bestfriends anymore?” jake pushed jay off of him but jay just shook his head, lips twitched up slightly into what looked like a sneer.
“believe it or not, we use to be close—me, jake, sunghoon, the whole damn highschool swim team. until jakey here—” jay poked a finger into jake’s chest “—decided to let it all crash and burn.” jay then turned to you. “now, i’m not the most innocent either. jake and sunghoon’s game they like to play—the whole player lifestyle—i use to be part of it all. we were all shitty, together.”
jay continued. “we would see who could get attached to us the fastest, and once they’d become too clingy… dropped. you see, we weren’t looking for anything serious, just some fun! we had just graduated and weren’t looking to settle down anytime soon. that is… until i was.” he then turned to hana, motioning a weak hand at her. “now i should've known better to fall for someone who was clearly still so obsessed with jake, but i thought it was young love. pathetic.”
hana rolled her eyes at jay before tilting her head at you, “you aren’t as special as you think. before he took your virginity, he took mine. i was you, don’t you see?”
jay snorted, “before he dropped you and barely remembered your name or who you were at all.” hana scoffed at him but jay ignored her. “hana and i started going steady and jake and sunghoon didn’t like that. it was always ‘oh, the two of you aren’t serious! you’ll just drop her like the rest!’ but months past and me not playing the game anymore only angered them more.”
jake finally seemed to snap out of his fog. “you’re such a fucking liar. we weren’t—”
“so they decided to get back at me, a harmless prank,” jay cut him off. “and clearly hana was using me to get back to jake, unbeknownst to me. they all thought it would be so funny if i found jake and hana together, to show me that she ‘wasn’t really worth it.’ and i did find them—only i didn’t find it funny, but to them the plan went off without a hitch so it was a success.”
jay turned from all of you. you could feel the anger radiating off of him as he retold the story and lived through all of the memories. shock grew on your face and you looked at jake with wide eyes.
“cue the big, disastrous fight that split the former swim team in half. lifelong friendships were broken, people were betrayed, and people chose sides. you get the gist.” jay turned back to you all, waving a hand in the air, face steeled.
he looked at you again. “you wanna know the kicker? despite not giving a single fuck about hana—not one—he then dated her after for four months. just to really stick it to me.”
your mind flashed to jake’s letter. about three years ago he said him and hana dated for four months but they “didn’t click,” so he broke up with her. he said that ever since she’s been making his life hell with her obsession with him and her trying to get back together. you felt like you were going to throw up. you hated hana, that much was obvious, but you couldn’t really dismiss the fact that jake took her virginity and then dropped her. it wasn’t an excuse, but it’s no wonder she’s so obsessed with him.
like she said, she was you. he probably made her feel like the only girl in the world for that one night.
“you’re just jealous of what jake and i had,” hana said, crossing her arms over her chest. jay’s gaze darted to her’s and wryly laughed. “sure, hana. you keep telling yourself whatever you need to help you sleep at night. jake never liked you the way you think he did. the only reason he dated you so long was because sunghoon dared him to see how long he could go before going crazy.”
hana blinked a couple times. clearly that information was new to her, too.
“i’m never one to forgive and forget, so now you can see why our friendship has long been dead and buried,” jay concluded. “i told you he’s not the saint you think he is.” jay sounded sorry for you and jake just stared at you with wide, fearful eyes. it was all too much for you to process.
“i need some space. i can’t… it’s over.” cheering exploded around you from everyone else at the party and you stumbled away, pushing through the door until you were hit in the face with fresh air. tears fell from your eyes and distantly you heard voices behind you calling your name.
you felt like no matter how hard you tried, oxygen wouldn’t reach your lungs. you pressed your hand to your stomach, trying to will yourself to breathe. you heard people arguing next to you and you closed your eyes to try and steady yourself as you inhaled sharply, air finally reaching your lungs. you turned to the voices as your ears suddenly heard them clearly.
“you just want everything i have, don’t you? can’t help yourself, huh?” jake shouted at jay.
jay got in his face and shouted back. “like you can’t help but throw the people you ‘care’ about to the side?” jay turned his focus to you. “tell me, y/n, who did he put over you this time? what lie has he told you to keep you crawling back to him?”
jake pushed jay hard. “don’t fucking talk to my girlfriend like that!”
“newsflash, you fucking idiot, she isn’t your fucking girlfriend anymore! you can’t help but ruin everything you touch!” jay yelled at jake. you felt your throat tightening again and you took a step back from them.
tears poured down your cheeks and a loud sob left your parted lips. they froze as their gaze snapped to your broken form. you turn and took off in a random direction that you hoped was towards your house.
you ran until you physically felt like you were gonna burst and gulped in a large breath of air. you heard jake calling after you as you swayed on your feet, vision blurring even more. jake put a hand on your shoulder, “baby…”
you spun in place, shrugging his hand off of you. “explain. explain right fucking now, or i swear we’re done for good. what else have you been keeping from me?” you asked through tears.
in the moonlight you could see the sparkle of tears welling up in jake’s eyes. “i swear there’s nothing else! i-i just didn’t want you to look at me like a monster when i’ve done everything in my power to not be that person anymore,” jake promised. you scoffed and looked away from him.
“i’m not gonna let you slip through my fingers again,” jake said. he sounded desperate but his words fell on deaf ears. “i already am,” you coldly replied.
jake grabbed your hand in his, intertwining them. suddenly you felt his hands all over you—his lips all over you and leaving the marks that were still on your skin, covered. “y/n… please just think this through. i haven’t seen hana at all until that day on the beach with you. i was a horrible person back then, but can’t you see that i’ve changed?”
you pulled your hand away. “i need time to know if i can trust you. we need to spend some time apart,” you replied, completely detached. the tears stopped falling from your eyes but your cheeks were still wet. all you felt was numb. you gave jake one last look before turning and walking away.
you haven’t been processing the past week and a half well—if at all. instead, you’ve been drinking a lot more than you care to admit. there practically hasn’t been a day where you weren’t at least a little bit tipsy. like today, you were just past tipsy and at the point where your mind was fogged over.
all you could think about was how hana said that she was you at one point and how that completely messed with your brain. what if jake was just seeing how long he could spend with you before going crazy like he did with hana? make you feel like the only girl in the world until the two of you “don’t click” anymore? it all terrified you, so you decide to not think about it at all.
you and jungwon were in your living room, lazily lounging on the couch as episodes of H2O: just add water played. you sighed deeply to yourself and jungwon looked over at you in question.
“everything reminds me of him,” you sighed again, watching as the girls raced to cover from the water.
jungwon side-eyed you. “be serious,” he said, eyes focusing on the tv screen again.
you stood from the couch, stumbling a bit. jungwon sat up. “where are you going?” he asked. you grabbed your jacket, there’s been quite the chill in the air lately, and slipped on your shoes at the door. “somewhere where i don’t think of him,” you responded.
opening the door, you stepped out before jungwon could say anything else.
truthfully, you didn’t know where you were going. you decided to wander and let your feet guide you hopefully to somewhere that jake wasn’t. that’s how you ended up a couple feet from jay’s backyard gate.
his words crept into your mind. maybe the two of you were the better match—and you were so, so lonely. at the very least, you just needed someone to comfort you. you knew drinking everyday wasn’t healthy, and jay was your friend. he would help you, right?
suddenly you heard his voice. “y/n?” jay asked and his face appeared in front of you. he looked worried and it took a second to realize that you were crying.
jay ushered you inside and to his room. he sat you on his bed, making sure that you were comfortable as he laid your jacket onto his desk chair. “what happened?” jay asked and all the emotions you tried so hard to keep at bay rushed forward.
it didn’t help that you caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror on jay’s door. jake’s love bites were just about healed—but you could still see them. it made you cry harder.
jay took you into his arms and you melted into them, crying into his chest. he rubbed comforting circles into your back and held you close until you were able to calm down a little. you looked up at him for a moment, still teary eyed, and softly pressed your lips to his.
you could tell that he was shocked—you were a little too, but he kissed you back nonetheless. the soft kiss between the two of you soon grew heated and you lifted yourself up onto the bed to sit in jay’s lap as his hand came to rest against your cheek. it wasn’t enough, you needed more.
deepening the kiss you grinded against jay’s thigh and he pulled away from your lips slightly, brows drawn together as his eyes remained closed. “y/n…” jay breathed, his voice low. “you're emotions are high right now and i don’t want you to do something that you’ll end up regretting. take a nap, we can talk more when you wake up and you’re sober.”
he pulled away more but you just shook your head. you needed this. “please…” you whispered, looking at him desperately before chasing his lips. whatever internal battle jay had with himself, he clearly lost as he kissed you back with more passion than before.
you grinded against his thigh more, low whines escaping your mouth as you tried to pull him closer. then, you blinked and you were under him. the two of you caught your breath, staring deeply into each other’s eyes. “do you want me to be nice…” jay trailed, breath fanning across the side of your neck, “…or do you want me to be mean?”
change is what you needed, and jake was always so nice when the two of you were intimate. “mean,” you replied, voice barely above a whisper. jay smiled before dipping his head to kiss you again, this time rougher.
clothes were discarded and in a flash you were laying naked on jay’s bed. your legs wrapped around his waist to pull him closer as you grabbed his shoulders for dear life as he pushed into you. your face contorted into one of pleasure and you buried your face into the crook of his neck to muffle your moan.
jay pushed you back onto the bed so he could get a full view of you and shook his head. “so pathetic and desperate… i want to hear you moan for me.”
he thrusted roughly into you and you moaned loudly. “that’s it,” jay smiled, fucking into you at a fast pace.
your eyes rolled back and all you could do was let the moans and whines and whimpers spill from your open mouth. jay’s pace was so fast that you felt like you were being split in two, his thick length stretching you so good that you saw stars.
he bent down to the shell of your ear, grunting from the effort he was putting in as he held down your hips, “i bet he never made you feel this good.” your back arched off the bed as you started to tremble.
“never was able to have to have you act like a whore in heat for cock, has he?” jay asked. you couldn’t answer him, head too in the clouds to even form a coherent sentence. you felt too good and pleasure spread throughout every inch of your body. it made you forget what you even came here for.
you were flipped so that you were on your hands and knees. your face fell down into the pillow. suddenly, there was pain at your scalp. jay kissed the side of your neck, his hand buried in your hair. “show me how much of a good girl you are. how desperate you are.”
gulping, with shaky legs you fucked yourself on his cock. everytime your head would try to fall, jay would tighten his grip in your hair to keep you upright. the more you fucked yourself onto him, the more your legs shook at the feeling in the pit of your stomach grew. you were sent over the edge when jay pushed your head into the pillows and fucked you himself.
“too m-much!” you cried, tears springing to your eyes. “can’t…”
“awe, you poor slut…” jay cooed mockingly. his condescending words only aided the rope in your stomach further to snapping. “sweet, pretty little whore. be glad your head is in the pillows and i’m not making you ride me like i should be.”
you cried out again, rope completely snapping as you came around jay’s cock. he didn’t stop—of course he didn’t. he was gonna keep going until he got his fill too.
you writhed underneath him as his pace only grew quicker. he pulled you by your hair towards him and back onto his cock as leverage to rut into you quicker. your mixed grunts and moans filled his room and the overstimulation sent you spiraling.
jay twitched inside you and he let go of your hair and grabbed your hips tightly, holding them against his as he came inside you and filled you up more. a loud moan fell from his lips as you fell back into the pillows, your body feeling like complete jelly.
“fuck,” jay groaned. “that’s my little slut.”
pulling out of you, you felt as your mixed cum poured out of you and down the back of your legs in a thick load. jay cursed behind you again before taking two fingers and fucking your sensitive hole with them, groaning at the wet sound it made. you whimpered, trying to angle your hips away from him.
“so pretty… so pathetic.” jay chuckled to himself.
your mind was still hazy from the alcohol as jay pulled you up onto shaking legs to get you all cleaned up in his bathroom. you could barely see with the change of scene and bright lights making everything seem blurry. you didn’t even realize that you were back in his room now and he was helping you put your shirt back on.
it wasn’t until you woke up, who knows how many hours later, next to him in just your shirt and panties confused. your head felt like it was going to explode from the alcohol as you took a look around the room, eyes widening from the unfamiliar surroundings. you were even more confused when a sleeping, half-naked jay was next to you. a horrific expression set on your face.
the sun was just about to set and guilt and regret hit you like a freight train. slowly, you slid out of the bed, making sure that jay didn’t wake up. you hurriedly put the rest of your clothes and jacket on and rushed out of jay’s room as quietly as you could.
all of the memories rushed back to you all at once as you rushed down the path to the boardwalk. what have you done? kissing jay was one thing, but sleeping with him? that was something entirely else. now it was all tangled in your emotions regarding your relationship with jake.
head hung low, you ran all the way back to you house, wishing that you never stepped out in the first place.
you had just gotten off work and were on your way home when a hand grabbed your wrist and spun you around.
“so you slept with him?” jake asked, crossed somewhere between hurt and anger. your eyes widened and that familiar guilt filled you once more. “i-i was drunk, it was a mistake!” you quickly replied.
jake wryly laughed. “a mistake…” he trailed, shaking his head and looking to the ground.
“yes, a mistake!” you exclaimed, pulling your wrist from his grasp. “and i regret ever doing it. you’re acting like you’re the only one who’s allowed to make mistakes!” jake looked at you incredulously. “how did you even find out?” you asked.
you surely didn’t tell anybody, you had no want nor need to flaunt it around. it never should’ve happened at all. that doesn’t mean jake got to look at you like you betrayed him when the two of you aren’t even together anymore.
jake pulled out his phone and shoved the screen in your face. “because he sent me a fucking picture of you sleeping half-naked in his bed with the word ‘checkmate’ attached.”
heart dropping, you took jake’s phone as you looked horrifically at his screen. you weren’t half-naked—you were covered by your rolled up shirt and panties—but it was still way too exposed. you honestly couldn’t believe that jay would take a picture of you after—and send it to jake, no less.
the sudden realization hit you harder than all of the guilt and regret you’ve been feeling. jay used you to get a leg up on jake. how much of him liking you was just him trying to get back at jake through you. a second realization hit—they’ve both been using you to get back at each other in this years-long rivalry. you felt sick.
tears welled up in your eyes and you pushed jake’s phone into his chest to get it away from you. you ran your hands down your face as you tried to breathe. you then glared up at him, “don’t act like you care... you only want me to get a leg up on jay. you don’t actually want me. both of you have been using me to get back at each other. all of this has been meaningless.”
“that’s not true, and you know that’s not true.” jake sighed deeply. “if you want jay—fine. i’ll take a step back and i won’t bother you anymore. but you can’t keep dragging me along and toying with both our feelings because you can’t decide. we can’t do this anymore—i can’t do this anymore, y/n. you know that i’m in love with you, and i know that you love me too deep inside. i’m trying to tell you how you calling this all meaningless really hurts me.”
“you’d know a lot about hurting people,” you murmured. “and ‘dragging you along’? ‘toying with both of your feelings’? i’ve done nothing of the sort.” a single tear fell from your eye and you harshly wiped it away.
“if you can’t accept that it was a mistake sleeping with jay and that i deeply regret it—whatever. but, the only people dragging people along and toying with feelings have been you and jay.” with that you turned on your heels and stormed off.
[ AUTUMN — THE COLD AIR MATCHES YOUR HEART ] 𓇼 and it’s freezing to the bone—yet, there’s a spark.
your mind was everywhere lately, a complete mess. at least you had stopped drinking since sleeping with jay. only, things changed for the worse.
you felt like an echo of who you were when you first arrived in this town. in a couple of weeks you had managed to convince yourself that maybe this was the best you were ever going to get. that maybe letting people use you in such ways was the only way you would ever feel loved. at least, that’s how it seemed—and so far nothing was proving your thoughts wrong.
the relationship between you and jay was complicated. you didn’t even know how to describe it anymore. he went around acting as if you were his girlfriend, even going so far to plant kisses on your cheeks. however, the two of you haven’t even kissed since the day you slept with him.
on your end, he was still just a close friend—though you have been growing more distant from him. you didn’t know if he noticed, and at this point you didn’t care. the only thing you wanted to do these days were get up, go to work, go home, and sleep the rest of the day away.
you were walking home one day after work, completely out of it and not at all listening to what jay was saying to you, when he stopped you. jay sighed to himself, like something had been weighing on his mind. “i can’t,” he said suddenly. all your energy allowed was the quirk of your eyebrow in a silent question.
“this has to stop. clearly you aren’t interested and i like you way too much to have only a half-assed relationship. it’s either one-hundred percent or nothing at all.”
something clicked in your brain and you gave him a pleading look as you shook your head. you didn’t want to lose the only affection you had left. “what are you talking about?” you asked.
“i mean come on, the two of you are made for each other, it's clear as day!” jay drawled. “has anyone told you what he was like when you left? even i was shocked to see him look like a shell of himself. and you act like i can’t see it—even when you’re with me you’re imagining you’re with him…”
tears poured from your eyes as you shook your head more. “no… no, that’s not true!”
deep down you knew it was true. you spent all your waking hours thinking about jake. thought about how royally you both fucked everything up. and to think that you didn’t want drama this summer… all your summer was filled with was drama—and it was creeping into your autumn too.
all you wanted was to be in jake’s arms again, but you didn’t know if that would ever happen. not after how much the two of you hurt each other. maybe it was for the best that you weren’t together if all it was going to cause was pain.
jay nodded at you solemnly. “go. be with him. stop delaying the inevitable when we both know the two of us won’t work out.”
“but-but i like you!” you exclaimed. another lie, but it was your last attempt at the love you so desperately clung to—even if it was false.
“not in the same way you love him, y/n.”
jay gave you a sad smile before he turned and walked away, leaving you standing alone as tears slid down your cheeks. you wrapped your arms around yourself as the cold autumn breeze draped over your body and made you shake. you sniffled and kept walking to your house, trying not to cry harder.
later that night you were even more of a mess than you were before. you sat in the dark of your room as you cried even more and even harder, the tears just seemingly never ended.
all you thought about was how you fucked everything up. how nothing will ever probably be the same again. and worst of all—all you wanted was someone who most likely didn’t want anything to do with you anymore.
to make matters worse, the subconscious part of your brain was working overtime and you didn’t even register the ringing of the phone pressed to your ear until it was too late.
“y/n?” jake’s voice asked softly, slightly groggy. shit.
your eyes widened to saucers and you fumbled with the phone in your hands as you tried to quiet your sobs. you finally pressed the ‘end’ button and threw your phone across the room. seconds later you heard your phone buzzing with a missed call and texts from jake.
“shit…” you trailed, realizing your mistake. all you did these days were make mistakes. “shit, shit, shit!” the tears fell from your eyes faster and you desperately wanted to scream—and you would’ve if it wasn’t so late in the night and your family was asleep.
a few minutes later, you heard the familiar opening of your window. jake stepped over the window ledge, clad in his pajamas and his long hair tousled like he got attacked by wind despite there not being even a breeze outside. shocked filled you as your eyes met his after so long.
you quickly wiped away your tears and turned your back to him. “i-i don’t want to talk to you!” you lied, sniffling hard to stop the sob trying to fight its way out of your body. you hated to admit it, but jake’s mere presence already made you feel immensely better.
the sound of your window closing behind you made you jump slightly. “then don’t talk,” jake said. behind you, the bed dipped. jake pressed his back against yours and you could feel the slow rise and fall of his breathing. “but i’m not leaving you alone right now.”
slowly, jake intertwined his hand with yours. “you can be as angry as you want with me. be as silent as a mouse until you want to talk again… but i’m not leaving your side.” the pad of his thumb rubbed the back of your hand and you broke down completely.
sobs wrecked through your body and you could no longer hide them from him. hot tears ran down your cheeks—more tears than you felt like you’ve ever cried in your entire life. you completely unraveled. you could tell that jake wanted to turn around and comfort you—you felt the turn of his head as he tried to look at you and the twitch of his fingers—but he wanted it to be on your terms. that just made you cry even more.
you’ve cried so much today that you were sick of crying forever.
it was shocking that even for a second you thought differently. jake was the one for you. it was always going to be jake, no matter the up and downs the two of you went through. it was never going to be anybody but him. you burned for him like you didn’t for no other.
finally, you managed to get yourself together enough to speak. half coherent apologies fell from your lips. “i-i’m sorry,” you finally managed. “i’m so sorry. i… i ruined everything and—” jake shushed you and you felt him shake his head.
you continued anyway, “i was acting like… like…” you just couldn’t find the right words.
jake shushed you again, this time turning to face you. you turned too, blistering tears still falling from your eyes. jake shook his head and cupped your wet cheeks with his hands, using the pad of his thumbs to wipe them away. you stared at him again for the first time in so long, still not quite believing that he was in front of you again.
you both seemed to be worse for wear. there were dark circles under jake’s eyes and they were red-rimmed like he had cried recently. still, he looked at you with that certain look in his eyes that he always had, and you were finally able to put a name to it—love.
“you didn’t do anything wrong,” jake said softly, but firmly. “nothing at all. if anyone is sorry, it’s me. you don’t know how sorry i am for making you think that i was dragging you along and toying with your feelings. i would never do that to you.”
your brows knitted together. you didn’t understand how he was so forgiving of you. you shook your head, “you deserve better than me.”
jake just chuckled. “i don’t want anybody but you.”
jake rested his forehead against yours before pulling you closer to him. you rested your head against his chest, hearing the soft thumps of his heartbeat, as you wrapped your arms around him. jake held you tightly—like if he let you go you would completely disappear.
slowly, you felt yourself begin to drift, the taxing emotions of the day finally catching up with you. you gripped the back of jake’s pajama shirt, scared that once you fell asleep you would wake up and he would be gone and this was just all one big dream. but the more you tried to say awake, the further your eyelids drooped.
“come here,” jake whispered, moving into a lying position. you cuddled up into his side, your head on his chest. jake rested his chin on your head. “sleep,” he said. “i’m not going anywhere.”
it didn’t take you long to drift into darkness, the sound of jake’s heartbeat aiding you. still, you grabbed onto him like your life depended on it the entire way—even after jake had covered the two of you with your blanket.
in the morning, jake awoke to you still tucked into his side and to the creek of your bedroom door opening. jungwon poked his head inside, a worried look on his face, before nearly jumping ten feet in the air after seeing jake.
jake held a finger to his lips, silently telling jungwon to keep quiet since you were still sleeping. with wide eyes, jungwon nodded. slowly, he shut the door and left the two of you alone.
looking down at you, jake made sure that you were still sleeping and was relieved to find that you still were. the sun peeked through your closed blinds, lighting up your room ever so slightly. jake held you closer to him and softly cradled your face with his hand, careful to not wake you. you stirred, but only to move closer to him, making jake smile.
later, you stirred again. this time jake knew you were waking up since your grip on his shirt suddenly tightened again as you stiffened. jake rubbed circled onto your back before pressing a kiss to the top of your head, the actions visibly relaxing you.
your eyes cracked open, adjusted to the change in brightness, and looked up at him before you buried your face back into jake’s chest. jake’s smile grew and you felt the vibrations of his laugh. “good morning, pretty,” jake said.
the cold autumn weather was only getting colder, but that didn’t stop you and jake from going to your spot.
you were giggling as jake wrapped his scarf around you, purposefully covering more of your face than he needed. he then pulled the scarf down to chastely kiss your lips, returning the scarf back to its former position of covering your face. you giggled more, “you gonna get sick!”
“all that matters to me is that my girlfriend doesn’t get sick,” jake replied.
you pulled him closer to you by his jacket and pressed your lips against his. the two of you moved your lips in sync before you pulled away, serious. there was something that you’ve been meaning to tell him since you’ve got here, and you felt that now was finally the time.
almost nervously, you said, “i love you, jake.”
jake stared at you for a second with wide eyes, like he thought he didn’t quite hear you clearly. when you smiled nervously at him is when it finally clicked for him. jake’s whole face lit up and he kissed you so passionately that the two of you almost fell over. “i love you,” he said before kissing you again.
you pulled away for air, giggling at his reaction. he started kissing you all over your face and you pushed him away, laughing more. “jake!” you exclaimed. he pressed a couple more kisses to your cheeks before kissing your lips again. “what?” he asked innocently, “i was just warming you up.”
you rolled your eyes and stood to your feet. you pulled him to his feet as well and the two of you dusted off sand from your clothes. “well, we should probably move away from the sea,” you smiled at him. your face then lit up.
there was still one more thing on your shared bucket list that you and jake still didn’t do. you completely forgot about the bucket list in general with everything that happened. “the abandoned skate park!” you exclaimed. “we still haven’t added our names to it!”
jake intertwined your gloved hand with his. he looked at you with eyes full of love. “let’s go then!” he smiled at you, kissing your cold cheeks. you scrunched your nose at him before dragging him out of your spot and towards the skate park.
on the way there, the two of you bought a disposable camera and a can of spray paint in your favorite color—at jake’s adamance. the two of you seeked out a good place to add your names for a while before finally finding the perfect spot.
“okay, go!” jake said, aiming his phone towards you. you turned and sprayed “y/n + jake = forever” into the spot the two of you had picked out before running back to where jake stood. the two of you switched—you taking the phone to record and him the spray can. jake then ran over and sprayed a wonky heart around your names, causing you to laugh.
jake looked back at you and laughed. “i told you you should’ve done the heart!”
you came up to him and he wrapped his arms around you as you got the two of you and your names in the camera view—kissing him briefly with an adoring smile—before ending the recording all together. jake then pulled the disposable camera out of his jacket pocket and snapped a picture of it and then of the two of you next to it. “to more memories!” he said.
after, jake turned to you. “do you remember what happened here?” he asked you. you nodded, “of course i do! this is where we had our first kiss!” jake smiled at you, kissing you like he did so long ago again, completely setting you alight and making your heart race even after all of this time.
“say it again,” jake said, his forehead against yours. you smiled. “i love you,” you replied.
you could practically feel the smile on jake’s face grow larger. “again,” he said. you giggled at him and the way he pulled you closer to his chest. “i love you, jake.”
“i love you, too.” jake kissed you again.
you felt as if your world was back on track now, no longer was the axis all out of place. you were here in jake’s arms where you belonged, his lips against yours as the two of you giggled at each other. you would never love anyone like you love jake. “i love you more,” you finally replied to him.
jake shook his head at you. “impossible,” he laughed. “nobody can love anyone as much as i love you.”
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pairing: Sunghoon x fem!reader
genre: angst with a happy ending, fluff, established relationship
content warnings: emotional neglect, some swearing, hoon is kinda a workaholic ig?, I don't think there's anything that really needs warnings other than this is sad but lmk if I miss anything!
summary: your boyfriend comes home late after promising to be home on time for once, only to find that you're nowhere in sight...
notes: this is another one that I'm not sure how to feel about ;-; but I hope you guys enjoy it TwT fun fact, the whole thing was inspired by an rp that I did with an ai where the robot somehow managed to call me by another person's name while cuddling XD
I'm making a general taglist for my fics so if anyone would like to be added please either send an ask or a DM ^w^
Everything below the cut is NOT proofread
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The white noise of your favorite movie buzzes through your living room, conversation and dialogue that you’d learned by heart filling the cold space with a false sense of familiarity. You sit cross-legged with your back pressed into the arm of the L-shaped couch in front of the tv, resting your chin on a plushie held close to your chest, looking not at the flickering screen to your right, but at the clock hanging in your kitchen–the only room in the house with the lights on.
9:17 pm, it reads. Roughly three hours and seventeen minutes since your boyfriend would typically get home from work.
Three hours and seventeen minutes since you’d been waiting on a barstool by the kitchen island where you both usually took your meals.
A tiramisu cake and a bouquet of flowers laid out in front of you.
Waiting.
Waiting.
So much waiting.
After an hour or so, you’d gently slid the cake back into its box, distracting yourself with the task of putting the flowers into a vase before they could wilt.
‘He’s late again,’ you think sleepily, eyes struggling to stay focused on the clock, ’he promised he wouldn’t be tonight.’
Your vision blurs as the long hand hits 12, eyelids too heavy to keep open, mind wandering to the conversation you’d shared with Sunghoon that morning.
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“What time will you be home from work today?” you asked sleepily, sitting up in your nest of blankets, having woken up to find that he was already in the process of pulling his socks on, careful not to wake you.
“I don’t know, Love, you know how crazy things have been with this update, I might be late again,” he said absently, looking around for his glasses. “Where the fuck did I put them?”
He runs a hand through his hair frustratedly, leg bouncing in agitation. It made your heart ache slightly in your chest, disappointment, guilt, and worry mixing confusedly in your stomach.
You loved Sunghoon, more than almost anything else in your life, he was the man you’d chosen as your partner, who you’d decided to stand by through thick and thin. But ever since the game company he worked for had started work on a new update, you’d been seeing less and less of him. Always coming home late, tired and stressed, mind wandering and absent even when he was sitting right in front of you. You understood, you really did. Between the two of you he was the one with the bigger income, the burden of taking care of you, of making sure that the two of you could build a future together, was on his shoulders. And it was a responsibility that he did not take lightly.
But still.
In moments like that, where you slid off your bed to fetch his glasses off the nightstand–blanket wrapped securely round your shoulders to fend off the cold that permeated your apartment since the heating had started to malfunction–moving round the bed to stand in front of him… you couldn’t help but feel like he was breaking your heart. Just a little.
It was in the way he only met your eyes briefly when he took them from you before standing and gathering the rest of his things, sighing in what could’ve been frustration or relief, it was hard to tell.
It was the way he didn’t stop the flow of movement steadily taking him away from you and towards the office till you called his name twice, stopping in his tracks and fixing you with a look that, though probably unintentional, made you want to bury yourself under your mountain of plushies and hide.
“I’m going to be late, (y/n), what is it?”
You winced. You couldn’t help it. Unaccustomed to hearing him say your name with so little emotion. “Just… could you come back on time tonight?” your voice is barely more than a whisper, tapering off into silence the longer you force your eyes to meet his. “Unless you can’t of course! I’m not saying you have to do anything, I understand that you’re busy and you can’t really dictate when or how things get done but just that it would be nice if you could be home on time tonight since-”
“Okay.”
“Huh?”
“I’ll make it home on time tonight.”
His voice was softer than it had been a moment ago, giving you the courage you needed to meet his eyes. They were still heavy with worry, brows drawn together to dig a permanent crease into the middle of his forehead, but they weren’t quite as cold or distant. He was looking at you, really looking at you for the first time in what felt like forever.
It wasn’t much, you knew that. But it was still enough to ease the knot building in your throat. Enough to bring a small smile to your face as you nodded. “Mnm! Okay, I’ll see you tonight then.”
“Mnm, alright,” he said, a small, slightly strained smile coming to rest on his own lips.
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The apartment was almost completely dark when the lock to the front door chimed, alerting the darkness that someone had arrived. The figure that stepped through was slumped over, backpack sliding off one shoulder with his jacket, shoes abandoned haphazardly.
It took a moment for Sunghoon’s mind to catch up to his body, for it to fully sink into his bones that he was home. That he was home and it was nearly 11 pm. Home and the tv and kitchen light were both on, white letters onscreen asking the room if anyone was still watching Netflix.
Something in the kitchen caught his eye, a handmade vase his sister had given you for your birthday set out on the kitchen island, filled to the brim with pink, white, and purple flowers he did not recognise.
’Oh’
It was his birthday.
That’s why you’d asked him to come home on time.
Sunghoon groaned, face twisting with what could only be described as pain as he quickly set his bag down by the front door and made his way to your shared bedroom. You were usually asleep by this time, unable to pull all-nighters the way you used to back when you were in high school, always out like a light by no later than 10:30 every night.
’But she still stays up every night waiting for you,’ a voice in his head hisses.
’I know… fuck I know she does,’ his own voice replies, panic setting in when he finds your room empty, the bed neatly made, not even a dent to show that you’d been laying in it while working on your laptop during the day.
’She’s not here… are you surprised? How long did you expect her to wait?’ the voice whispers, a chill cascading down his spine.
The panic sets in with more vigor, wrapping round his throat and sending his tired mind into overdrive as he checks the bathroom, your home office, and finally the dark living room. Fear telling him that this was it.
He’d really gone and done it now.
He wasn’t a complete fool. He knew the moment you stood in the middle of your bedroom floor instead of closing the distance between you and wrapping your arms around his waist, choosing instead to clutch your favorite duvet like a lifeline, wincing when you heard his voice, all because you wanted to ask him to come home… he knew right then that he’d been an absolute idiot.
He’d meant to come home early, to be there to make it up to you, to apologise properly, tell you that he’d take some time off as soon as the update was done and dusted.
But he didn’t. He let work sweep him up again. Drowning in error messages and buggy code till the sky outside his office windows was filled with the flickering lights of the city at night.
And now… now you weren’t there.
He’d left you alone.
He’d left you alone too long and you were gone.
You were gone.
You were gone and-
’Oh.’
There you were.
The relief when Sunghoon sees you–curled up on the couch, partially hidden by a small pile of blankets and stuffed animals–is immediate.
He doesn’t really register the way he sighs your name, shoulders relaxing, body melting into the floor the moment he’s in front of you, hand brushing a few messy strands of hair out of your face. The need to feel the warmth of your skin, to confirm that you really are there in front of him more an instinct than a conscious decision.
You mumble something in your sleep, tilting your face away from his cold fingertips, eyes fluttering open. “Hoon… hi baby… welcome home,” you say tiredly, shifting under your blankets in an attempt to pull yourself up.
Sunghoon feels his heart crack in his chest. Why were you smiling at him? You should've been angry. You should've pushed him away, demanded to know why he was back so late, why he'd been neglecting you in the first place.
“Baby? My love… why are you crying?” you ask, reaching for him through the haze of sleep still clinging to your limbs.
Choking back a sob, he leans closer, tucking his head under your chin and doing his best to wrap an arm around you from his place on the carpeted floor. “Nothing,” he says, shaking his head, though the tears soaking into your sternum say otherwise, “just missed you…”
Your vision blurs at his words, a thread of steadily building tension and worry that had been constricting your heart for the past few weeks snapping. “Oh…” your voice shakes slightly, lungs shuddering as your breaths begin to feel lighter, “I’m right here you goose, what’re you crying for?”
“Who says I’m crying,” he says, hoarse with tears.
“Right right,” you laugh despite the dampness now soaking through your own cheeks, “because my baby never cries, huh?”
“Never,” he sniffles, nuzzling closer.
You stay like that for a while, eventually urging him to sit more comfortably on the couch, allowing you to settle yourself on his lap, his arms still wrapped firmly round your waist, hands occasionally kneading whatever part of you he was in contact with as if he needed to assure himself that you were there, solid and real.
He waits until he feels your heartbeat slow to a steady rhythm, trying his best to calm down so his own can match yours, beat for beat. The way it–in his opinion–should.
But it wouldn’t, there were words lodged in his throat, and every time he tried to get them out he felt that same panic wash over him, sending his heart into a frenzy.
You could feel like beating against your cheek, could sense that there was something he wasn’t saying from the way his grip on you would tighten almost imperceptibly, stiffening as if he was bracing himself for something. A part of you wanted to push him, prompt him and ask what was going through his head, why you’d woken up to the sight of him crying in the dim light of your living room. And you would’ve if he hadn’t beat you to it.
“I’m sorry, (y/n).”
“What do you mean? For being late? I know you can’t help it, Hoon, it’s not some-”
“No! I mean yes, I’m sorry for being late tonight but… I mean… I mean for everything… for not being… here, with you, like this… as often as I should be, I’m sorry,” he says, the hands at your sides nervously fidgeting with the fabric at your hips, nervously looking between your face and the static tv screen behind you.
Sunghoon had never been good with words. You’d learned early on in your relationship that he preferred to show how he felt through his actions. Yet here he was, fumbling through an apology because… because…
“My love… did you think I’d left?” you ask, gently cupping his face with one hand, urging him to look at you.
Puffy red eyes still wet with tears, messy unkempt hair from running his hands through it all day, tired and probably as emotionally spent as you’d ever seen him and still… still he was the most beautiful person in the world to you. He nodded, hiding his face in your chest again, hands stilling.
“Well,” you sigh, resting your chin on top of his head and running a hand through the hair at the back of his head, combing through it in a way he swears only you can, “at least you know you’ve got things you need to make up for…”
“I know… I forgot for a while… but I know…”
“That’s okay then,” you breathe, leaning back to kiss his forehead. “But Sunghoon… baby… darling… the love of my life… my little pookie bear… “ you both giggle a little at the pet names, “You know I’d never leave you over something like this right? I was sad, and hurt, and I still expect you to make it up to me by never doing this again but… I still love you, it only hurts because I love you… I’m not going anywhere.”
Sunghoon pauses for a moment, letting your words sink in. You think that when he looks up, lips slightly parted, it’s to say something in response, but you really should’ve known better.
Slowly, giving you enough time to pull away should you choose to, his breath mingling with yours before he steals it away with a soft, lingering kiss. Neither of you is in any rush to take things further.
It feels like a small eternity before he pulls away, like time stills for you both, but then he’s pressing his lips to your jaw, butterfly kisses tickling you down to your pulse point, making you giggle so you almost miss it when he says, “I love you too… so much…”
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It isn’t until the next day when you’re shuffling into your home office dressed in one of his oversized jerseys, complaining about a meeting that he remembers the flowers he’d seen on the kitchen island.
Pulling out his phone, he makes good use of his detective skills (and google lens), remembering all the times you’d spoken to him about the language of flowers, and the meanings behind certain blooms.
He wasn’t quite sure whether to laugh or cry once he’d figured it out, opting to dig through the cabinets for a pack of waffle mix to fix you some breakfast instead. He had a lot of apologies to make…
Baby’s Breath: pure everlasting love
Pink Camellias: longing for you
Forget-me-nots: true love memories, do not forget me
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KEROSENE (trailer) 𖣂
jake sim & park sunghoon.
the third installation of fright night.
click here ^
there's a fine line between delusion and reality.
summary: jake sim was your boyfriend. park sunghoon was your best friend. neither knew about each other. you weren’t sure where your heart belonged, and you watch as your life begins to tear in half from the secrecy and guilt. but just when you think you’ve got it all figured out, an earth-shattering secret changes everything.
pairing: bf!jake vs. bsf!sunghoon x fem!reader
genre: psychological thriller, horror, love triangle (kinda… you’ll see)
warnings: violence, mildly disturbing behavior, substance use, heavily implied mental illness, very psychological, cheating (?) ig, nobody’s really evil in this one (phew) enha’s personalities and backstories are not a reflection of reality, it’s just a story
join the taglist ! @enhacolor @jwnghyuns @theothernads @adoredbyjay @firstclassjaylee @dollschan @enreveriee @surrik-i @jwonistic @laurradoesloveu @laylasbunbunny @tmtxtf @shixna606 @kumiwon @heeaxvhhoon
more under the cut!
The flames burned bright, and you couldn’t tear your eyes away from the crackling fire. The yellow and orange flames flashed like rubies, licking the dark sky, illuminating the beach as you watched them burn. It was like a dance, the way the fire swayed in the wind.
“You okay?” a voice broke you out of your trance as Jake planted a kiss on your cheek. You snapped out of it, smiling up at him as he reached for your hand, clasping it gently in his. He sat down on the sand beside you.
Jake Sim. A year older than you, the sweetest boy you had met in your entire life. He had sparkling eyes full of youth, a smile that could make angels sing, and a calmer temperament than anyone you’d seen in your 20 years of age. You were lucky enough to call him your boyfriend.
Many people thought you were polar opposites, but that was what made you perfect for each other. You didn’t make friends easily, but he was happy to share his. He wasn’t very emotional, but you didn’t mind coaxing him into confessing what he was feeling. He helped you come out of your shell, you helped him learn to love the peaceful moments. After all, they say opposites attract., and that was certainly true for you.
You had only been dating for six months, but all your friends told you he was the one. And you were beginning to really believe it.
“I’m good.” you replied sweetly. You and Jake’s friends were laughing and dancing boisterously, but you didn’t feel like joining in on the fun. The fire was giving you plenty of company, and an unsettling feeling was creeping into your heart. Maybe it was the Halloween season, or maybe your doubts went deeper than that.
“I’ll sit with you then.” Jake offered kindly, wrapping an arm around your shoulder, and you leaned into him gratefully.
You were in love with Jake, you knew that. He was the first thing you thought of in the morning and the last at night, the main topic of all your conversations. He was sweet, thoughtful, smart, funny, and had every quality you ever wanted from a boyfriend. He was perfect, yet somehow, this didn’t feel right. Six months later, and you were beginning to have doubts. You had doubts in all of your past relationships, but none of them were as good as this one. Despite that, something was off. You could feel it.
For now, you tried to put it behind you, letting the fire and Jake’s warm touch comfort you as you watched the dancing flames.
𖣂 𖣂 𖣂
It was Sunday morning. You were looking forward to a day of no classes, and some alone time. While you loved being with Jake, you had spent everyday together for the past two weeks, and you were craving a little time to yourself.
It was a bit of a drive, but you suddenly wanted to go to your favorite bakery, picking up a fresh baguette to bring home, plus a few pastries for yourself. After that, you visited a nearby park, sitting on a bench alone.
You let the fresh air revitalize you, your hair floating in the breeze. There was hardly anyone in the park, the locals deterred by the fog and biting cold, but you had always enjoyed gloomy weather. You took a croissant out of the ribbon wrapped box, taking a bite and relishing in the peaceful feeling of being alone.
You closed your eyes briefly, and when you opened them, you were put out to discover someone standing before you.
He was extraordinarily good looking; it was the first thing you noticed about him. With his kind eyes, tall stature, and silky dark hair, he looked like an angel appearing out of the fog. He was standing a couple of feet away from the bench you were sitting at, looking at you directly with a soft smile.
“Oh,” you said, startled. “Hi.” You weren’t sure if you were supposed to address him, but he was clearly waiting to say something to you.
“Hi,” he replied. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I just liked your shirt.” You looked down at yourself, completely forgetting about your ripped tee, suddenly embarrassed about your messy outfit.
“You like Amy Winehouse?” you asked, and he nodded excitedly.
“Love her. Valerie was my top song for like, three years in a row.” He seemed eager to share his love of jazz music, and if you were a little more of a senseless person, you could’ve fallen in love right then and there.
“What are the odds?” you said, not sure how to respond. He smiled. Then he held out his hand.
“I’m Sunghoon.”
𖣂 𖣂 𖣂
a/n: hey y’all! my last fic in this series took foreverrrr but the rest will be coming out faster <3 please boost these posts I worked super hard on these fics and trailers!! love you all 💋
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Lucifer|| 18+
Synopsis: After you found your husband cheating on you, you found a different kind of comfort in his devilishly handsome colleagues.
Pairings: detective!02z × fem!reader
A/N: this is one of the, if not the most filthiest shit I've ever written, and I apologise to everyone who will read this because THIS IS ACTUALLY PORN. Shoutout to @jaeyunluvr for inspiring me to make this fic hehe.
Prologue
Pairings: detective 02z × fem!reader
Warnings: angst, fluff, suggestive, minors please do not interact, catcalling, mention of alcohol, reader is cheated on by Heeseung, cheating (which I do not condone in real life)
Status: posted!
The Demon of Destruction
Pairings: detective!Sunghoon × fem! reader
Warnings: Smut minors Dni, dildo use, ab riding, swearing, use of aphrodisiac, slightly drunk reader, fem!reader, p in v, rough sex, degradation, praise, mention of cheating, creampie, dom!Hoon, reader is called 'angel'
Status: Posted!
The Elysian Angel
Pairings: detective!Jake × fem!reader
Warnings: smut minors Dni, oral (f receiving), anal sex, switch Jake, slight dom!reader, praise, degradation, p in v sex, dumbification, use of petname 'pup', mention of food and alcohol, Heeseung being an asshole
Status: Posted!
The Fallen One
Pairings: detective!Jay × fem!reader
Warnings: smut minors Dni, fingering, cock riding, p in v sex, unprotected sex (not for you), reader has like three orgasms?, Jay's just really obsessed, Fluffy in the end, swearing, mention of food and alcohol, final fuck you to Heeseung yay
Status: Posted!
Epilogue
Pairings: husband!Jay × wife!reader
Warnings: smut minors Dni, thigh riding, oral (f receiving), multiple orgasms, overstimulation, p in v sex, penetration, degradation, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), rough sex, dom!Jay, sub!reader, breeding kink, mention of pregnancy, cumming inside, JayYn forever I love these idiots
Status: Posted!
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dandelion
author's note. i saw those pics and howled how is he so husband coded..... also decided to post this on his e word day to cheer up us all:(
summary. you feel a little down when your husband seems interested in another woman... but maybe that's your pregnancy causing unnecessary drama in your head
warnings. reader is pregnant<3 slight angst bc reader is hard on herself regarding her looks:( jealousy + mentioned drinking (not reader!!!! never drink while pregnant!!!!), haechan being a lil mean but he doesnt mean it lmao
word count. 1582
jaehyun was helping in the kitchen and laughter was booming from the room whereas you and the others sat in the living room, waiting.
“the food was so good” you sighed dreamily, rubbing your tummy in a satisfied motion and a huge smile.
“i bet she liked it too, huh?” jungwoo snickered, pointing at your stomach.
“oh yes she did. she’s a meat lover after daddy” you giggled and patted your baby bump gently.
“you inhaled that bbq, we thought there’d be nothing left” haechan giggled and mark nudged his elbow.
“dude!” he hissed, sending you an apologetic smile.
you just scoffed, shaking your head.
“no, no, he’s right. it’s the baby you know. sorry” you mumbled and yuta plopped down next to you.
“don’t apologize, he’s just not too much of a thinker” he teased and rubbed his own stomach too “man, i’m full”
“drinks!” doyoung waltzed into the room, balancing a platter. the ice in the elegant glasses clinked, colorful beverages shining in the sun falling through the huge window.
johnny put down a bowl of chips.
“ah, i’ve been waiting for that” yuta hummed like a purring cat and snatched the drink the second doyoung placed them down.
“and an orange juice for a special lady” jaehyun appeared in front of you and handed you the glass. it had ice and a paper umbrella in it, a slice of lemon adorning the edge.
you sent him a soft smile, puckering your lips in a pout. that’s a habit you developed ever since your pregnant belly started being too restrictive. it was a sign for ‘i wanna kiss you but i can’t move’
he leaned closer and planted a sweet kiss on your lips, knowing what you meant.
“i wanna drink too…” you joked, pouting like a kicked puppy.
“one more month baby” jaehyun said softly, sending you a reassuring smile.
the evening went on, chatting and joking accompanied by the football match they were watching.
you were slowly dozing off, partly paying attention to what they were saying.
“y/n is almost as round as the ball now, look!” donghyuck giggled and your eyes snapped open at the mention of your name.
“i wonder if your belly if bigger than a ball… i’d say it’s rather a basketball size, huh?” jungwoo pondered.
a bitter pang overtook your heart. you know they didn’t mean it to sound rude but you couldn’t help but wonder if you’re really that… big… and round… and apparently so easy to target, too.
jaehyun caught your unfazed expression and clicked his tongue.
“you remind me of a ball too. your fuckass big head–“ he joked at haechan and everyone laughed, including you.
and when you went to the bathroom, you missed jaehyun taking the youngest to the side.
“do we have everything, baby?” your husband asked, pushing the cart. you looked at your notes, not even halfway checked.
“we barely entered the mart” you grunted and looked up at him. his dimples poked in a boyish smile.
“anything you’re craving right now, misses” he teased and you rolled your eyes.
you may or may have not sneaked some of your pregnancy cravings into the cart but you didn’t think he’d notice.
“shut up. it’s our girl, not me” you huffed dramatically and wrapped your hands around his arm.
suddenly, a pretty girl appeared in the aisle. she had long, silky blonde hair and was wearing a really cute outfit. it displayed her long legs and the crop top she was wearing exposed her flat stomach. her face was perfect, makeup glowing like a model.
you sulked upon seeing her figure. you missed your old body. you missed being able to walk around in outfits like these. hell, even fitting in jeans was out of your reach now.
you realized that when she passed you by, jaehyun turned his head to look at her.
wave of sadness washed over you, slowly letting go of his arm. you didn’t blame him, though. you were nothing compared to her. big belly, no makeup, hair in a normal ponytail. you haven’t dressed up in a while – and even if you did, you wouldn’t look like you would before.
“i don’t feel too good. i’ll go back to the car” you mumbled, feeling like crying. you wanted to hide from the world… from your own husband.
jaehyun’s features dropped in instant worry, turning to you.
“are you okay? i’ll drive you home. do you need to see a doctor?” he asked, panic in his voice.
“i’m… no, i’m fine! just finish the shopping, ill wait in the car” you grunted and gave him your phone with the list, turning around on your heel.
he has never ran enough a grocery shop so fast in his entire life.
after almost sprinting to the car and loading the bags, he hopped in and scanned your face in search of pain. there was always a risk of you giving birth sooner than expected so he was just extremely cautious.
he noticed your swollen eyes and wet tears. maybe it was just the hormones, it’s not like you haven’t cried before because he just killed a fly. (“what if that fly was pregnant too? what if it was a working father? what if–”)
he started the car and reached out to grab your hand. you just played with his fingers to ease your nerves, a silent drive home.
for the past two days jaehyun had a feeling that you were avoiding him. you’ve been either sleeping all day or hiding away in your bedroom.
at the end of the day jaehyun decided to talk to you. but upon walking into the room, he saw you sitting at the edge of the bed. your loose shirt was slightly up, your fingers tracking red stretch marks on the side of your stomach.
“hey baby, what’s up?” he hummed, walking up to you “we haven’t talked in a while, hm? everything okay?”
you sighed and just pulled the shirt down, covering your belly completely.
“look at me pretty, come on” he was starting to get worried. kneeling down to settle between your looks, he noticed your teary eyes.
“i just feel so gross, you know?” you mumbled, gently rubbing your tummy. jaehyun sighed softly, relieved to hear that you’re not in physical pain. he put one of his hands on your knee, rubbing it in a soothing motion “like i know it’s inevitable but everyone keeps making comments and… and i just miss my old body. it may never be the same… and… it’s just dumb”
“don’t listen to haechan, he’s still a kid. he doesn’t know what he’s talking about” jaehyun said, trying to ease the tension
“i saw the way you looked at the girl, in the store” you mumbled, lips quivering. he furrowed his brows and realization hit him like a ton of bricks. but before he could explain, you went on “and i get it, i’m so ugly now, i don’t even dress up. i can’t even put anything else than sweatpants… and don’t even mention heels. i get you.”
“oh honey… she had a cute outfit, that’s why i looked. i think you have a similar top, by the way. but also, i agree, i turned my head but… her face seemed familiar. you know that it was johnny’s ex?”
“what?” you asked, finally looking at him. the cute dimple smile painted his cheeks as he nodded.
“yeah. i just, i don’t know, was so shocked it was her so i just turned around. but not to check her out or anything. because you are–” he started.
“wait, the one with a foot fetish?!” you asked suddenly.
jaehyun snorted loudly, hanging his head low. and here he was about to be romantic.
“yeah, her” he snickered and looked back up “but my point is, i only have my eyes on you. we both knew that pregnancy will change your body and i admire you so much. you’re so strong. and just know that, whether or not you will go back to your shape… the stretch marks will stay… will grow old and wrinkled… i will love you. those things don’t matter to me”
you shook your head and pulled the shirt over your face, something you did when too embarrassed to cry. and you did, small sobs choking out from under the material.
“you look beautiful to me. you’re carrying our baby girl and you really glow, to me” jaehyun said and stood up, hands going to rest on your shoulders.
“i love you” you cried and put your shirt down only to wrap your hands around his waist and sob into his shirt. he rubbed your skin in a calming way.
“i love you more, pretty girl” he whispered into your hair.
after you’ve calmed down he helped you lay down and tucked you in. jaehyun laid down next to you and rested his head on his hand, adoring you with a soft smile.
“got it? you’re the prettiest” he hummed and placed a soft kiss on your lips. then, his hand sneaked to lift your shirt a bit.
he traced the red stretch marks with a feather-light touch and then put his hand gently on your belly. he felt small movements and warm feeling spilled over his heart.
“and i bet she’ll be equally beautiful, my little dandelion” your husband whispered softly. and you couldn’t help but grin, looking at his whipped state.
nct masterlist | event masterlist
taglist. @l3visbby ,, @laylasbunbunny ,, @planetkiimchi ,, @mon2sunjinsuver ,, @w3bqrl ,,
@eternalgyu,, @haecien ,, @slytherinshua + event: @rubywonu
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RED AND GOLD — LEE HEESEUNG
SYNOPSIS — decelis was holding their annual masquerade ball and you finally decided to attend. however, who would’ve known that struggling to find your friends would help you find gold?
PAIRING — rival!heeseung x fem!reader
CONTAINS — fluff and slight angst (ending wise), rivals to rivals ??, was supposed to be for halloween…!, kind of rushed as well (fighting writers block rn), and not proofread.
WORDCOUNT — 1379 words
October 31st was Halloween and the day your school hosted their annual masquerade ball at Ju’s Banquet Hall.
To be honest, this year was your first time attending. You never had time for things like this in the past, but since it was your final year of school, you managed to find some (and with the help of your friends pushing).
The music from outside the banquet was loud. There was no chance to miss it either.
“Thank you,” you said with a smile while exiting your mother’s car.
“Have fun! By the way, you look amazing.” She said as your smile grew bigger.
“Let me take a picture!”
“Absolutely not—Stay in the car, where are you going?!” You panicked. Your mother was quite the embarrassment when it came to stuff like this.
“Oh, come on! It’s your first year. Let me mark the memory.” She frowned while holding the release button of her seatbelt.
“I’ll send you some, I promise.” You reassured her as she raised a brow.
“100%?”
“Yes, 100%.”
She smiled at your words and waved goodbye as you took that as an opportunity to leave as well.
Your right hand held onto your belongings, including the dark red mask you were planning to wear while the other pinched at your dress. It was long. You couldn’t risk falling in front of so many people, especially not in your first year of attending.
As you walked up the steps, your phone began to ring. You couldn’t see the contact name but the red and green phone buttons were in your view.
Hopefully it was your friend Eunchae.
“Hello?” You said after swiping right.
“Hey, (Name)! Where are you? Are you here yet?” Eunchae said on the other line.
“Yeah, uh, I’m about to enter the hall.” You replied while squinting at the sign above. You could barely see it.
“Okay, we are at the drinks table. They have fruit punch!” She cheered. She loved fruit punch, it was her favourite drink.
You smiled at her childish tone and told her you were on your way. Once the call ended, you slipped on your mask and walked through the doors of the hall in search of the drinks table Eunchae boasted about.
There were too many people everywhere. You were cramped. It would’ve been better if she told you the colour dress she wore, but she didn’t.
Your brows furrowed as you took out your phone to call Eunchae once more. There was no way you could find her and the drinks table in such a big place.
You unlocked your phone and called her contact, then placed your phone against your ear as it dialed.
And dialed… Then beeped.
There was no answer.
Honestly, if you knew this would happen, you would have stayed home. You could’ve been studying during this hour. Studying hard enough to beat your so-called rival, Lee Heeseung, on the next Functions test.
“Great.” You mumbled followed by a sigh of disappointment. You began walking around, hoping she would appear somewhere and soon. Part of you was ready to call your mom back and ask her to drive you home.
It hadn’t even been 5 minutes yet.
All of a sudden an arm bumped yours, causing you to stumble due to your heels and land in the embrace of another being.
A possible stranger and fellow schoolmate.
“Are you okay?” They asked. Their voice sounded quite alarmed.
“I’m completely sorry, that was my fault.” You replied while regaining your composure.
“Nah, it’s fine. But are you okay? He kind of bumped into you harshly.”
All you could see were his eyes and lips, and yet, you were able to tell how sincere and worried he sounded. It was almost as if he was the one who got hurt.
It was funny.
He stared at you in confusion as you began to laugh. He would be lying if he said it didn’t sound pleasing.
“What’s funny?” He asked, clueless.
“Nothing, nothing. I’m okay, don’t worry.” You replied once you calmed down, a smile still present on your face.
“So, are you here with anyone tonight?” You questioned in an attempt to change the topic.
“Kind of and kind of not?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m here with my friends, but I can’t find them. This place is too big.”
“No way, same! They said they were at the drink table as if I’d know where that was.”
He laughed at your words.
“Do you want to keep each other company then?” He asked and you nodded. He seemed nice and not creepy.
It was probably the best temporary choice you had.
You two began walking side by side through the crowds of people in an attempt to find a quieter and less crowded place.
“What should we do?” You asked as he looked at you in disbelief. Due to the silence, you looked over at him only to be met with his shocked expression.
“What?” You asked again.
“Is this your first year here?” You nodded at his words, explaining how it was your first time as a senior all together.
Out of nowhere, he grabbed your wrist and guided you both out of the crowded hall. You had no clue where he was taking you. Maybe he wasn’t trustworthy after all.
Was this how you were going to die?
All your thoughts clouded your mind, distracting you from the sudden change of scenery.
“Look,” he said and released your wrist in the process.
You were brought back to reality as you looked around, noticing the many fairy lights and flower filled walkway.
“Pretty, right?”
“Very.” You said while walking ahead of him as he smiled.
“I’m guessing you’ve been here often.” You said and brushed your fingertips against the petals of the flowers.
“Not at all, it’s my first year too, but this is where my friends and I met up.” You paused at his words and turned around on your pivot foot.
“And you were shocked at me saying this was my first year? You have no room to talk.”
You narrowed your eyes as he chuckled, muttering playful apologies.
“At least I got to show you this place, right?”
You remained silent. He wasn’t wrong. Without him, you wouldn’t have found out about this place anyways.
“Oh, by the way, I didn’t catch your name—”
“Can’t. Rules are rules.” He said, interrupting your incomplete sentence.
“Ah, right. I forgot.” You mumbled. That was a pretty stupid sentence anyway. What was the point of a masquerade ball if you were going to reveal each other’s identities?
“If anything, I’m sure we would run into each other tomorrow at school?” He questioned, part of him hoping you two would. You seemed sweet and were dressed beautifully.
“Of course, I’ll remember you as…”
You analyzed his outfit; he was dressed in a white and gold tuxedo and wore a black masquerade mask which only left his eyes and lips uncovered.
“As Gold? It’s pretty basic, but that’s the best I’ve got.” You said, quite embarrassed.
“It’s alright, I could remember you as Red as well.” He smiled.
To you, he was something you never met before.
However, for him, he knew who you were. You were his rival and he was Lee Heeseung.
To him this was funny, you two were arguing over your assignments at least 5 hours before tonight.
Now, his heart fluttered at the sound of your voice, the sight of your smile, and your laughter. There had to be something in the air, but he couldn’t bring himself to get away from you. It was his first time seeing you dressed up so formally. It was different from the school uniforms and atmosphere.
See, he knew if you were to find out about him being ‘Gold’ you would be quite disgusted. Or at least that was what he thought. So, to keep the night alive, he kept it a secret.
Even the next day he didn’t mention anything. To you, he would always be the boy you wanted to win against, and unfortunately, he was okay with that.
Although Red and Gold went well together, that didn’t mean you two did as well.
© JUYEOZ
ENHYPEN PERM TAGLIST — @miumura @macapunoz @kxppachu
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what do you think about brat!reader that has a fixtation on pulling jaehyuns hair during sex but since he enlisted, brat!reader couldn’t do it because of his short hair and has been bugging him about it through the phone whenever he calls to check in on her and when he comes back home during his break, brat!reader is still pissed about it but jaehyun is in a loving way annoyed with her brattiness and puts her in her place ( if you don’t mind could you write something along the lines of this too 🤗🤗🤗)
Completely Yours
SUMMARY | Jaehyun gives you unconditional love before he enlists.
PAIRINGS | Jaehyun x Reader
RATING | Mature, NSFW, EXPLICIT, MDNI, 18+
GENRE | husband!Jaehyun, soon-to-be-dad!Jaehyun, smut, established relationship
CONTENT/WARNINGS | profanity/strong language, filthy dirty thoughts, unprotected sex (wrap it up ya’ll!), fingering, oral sex (female receiving/male giving), dirty talk, praise kink, pet names, vaginal penetration
LENGTH | 3,543 words
TAGLIST | —
NETWORKS | @k-vanity @ksmutsociety
AUTHOR’S NOTE | Hi anon, I know it's not exactly what you requested but I did include a hair-tugging kink in there lol. I hope you still like it regardless. I finally managed to finish this and sure, it's not as long as the other Jaehyun fics I've written, I still hope you all like it. My brain has not been braining for this fic and it has drove me crazy but I really wanted to get this posted before Jae enlisted. I also want to thank @caelesjjk for the gorgeous banner! Please reblog, like, comment, I love you all and I'm gonna miss Jaehyun for the next 18 months. 💚
"Come here, babe," Jaehyun's deep voice is sweet like honey. He's sitting up in bed, blankets over his bottom half and propped up against the headboard, relaxed. His fingers are crooked, signaling you over. "I wanna do somethin'."
There's a devilish curve to his lips, hinting at some mischief. With how hot and cold he's been this last week—all touchy one moment, ignoring you the next—it makes you hesitate in walking over. You eye him warily, watching him coo at you. "What's gotten into you? What do you want, exactly?"
"Just want my wife," Jaehyun replies.
You crawl your way between his legs, knees planted on either side of his thighs. "I'm still mad at you. I hope you know that."
"Still?" His hands fit themselves at your waist perfectly. A kiss finds itself placed right below your ear. Another at your jaw, then to the side of your nose. "Baby, it's only the military. You know I have to go. I'll be back soon."
"Not soon enough," your tone is accusatory and petulant; he's aware of this as his fingers dance against the fabric of your silk slip nightgown, stopping just as the hemline hits the junction between your inner thigh and hip. You frown, running your hand through his now short hair. "I miss the longer hair already."
"Gonna miss tugging on it during sex, is that it?" he snorts, blowing raspberries into your neck as he squeezes the globes of your ass with his big hands. You jolt up in response, barely able to smother out the surprised noise from your mouth.
"Y-yeah! I like when it's long...and I get to yank on it and make you make pretty noises. No more stupid buzzcut," you groan, doing your best not to think about what you were going to be without for a whole two years.
"Taeyong's girlfriend didn't complain when he cut his hair," Jaehyun chuckled deeply, the sound vibrating through his chest. "It'll grow back real quick and then I can go back to giving you head while you hold it and tug on it however you like."
“That’s Taeyong’s girlfriend,” you whined. "But you promise, Jae?"
"I promise," Jaehyun bites into the joint between your shoulder and neck and then soothes over it with his warm tongue. He hums, "Time will go by so fast. And, anyway..." his lips are brushing against yours. He still looks so good with the short hair. So handsome when he smiles. His words are full of sureness as he caresses your belly, "you have a piece of me already."
Your heart squeezes at this because he's right. Inside of you, there is already a small fragment of him living and growing, something physical for you to always cherish. "How did you find out?"
His arms wrap around you, snug and warm. Your lips mold against his and he's drinking you in. "I found the test when I was getting the emergency kit before we left for our trip. Why didn't you tell me, baby?"
"I don't know. I… I was nervous. Not about having a baby with you. I'm afraid of...afraid of being by myself without you," the grip around you grows tighter at your confession. "How can I get through the next 18 months without you? Who is going to help me when I get fat and angry with hormones?" You laugh, watery at the sudden sting of tears brimming behind your eyes. The words start to flood past your lips now that you've confessed. "Who will hold my hair back for me when I barf, or massage my aching feet at the end of a long day?"
"I'm always a phone call away, baby. All you have to do is reach out," he hugs you tighter, pressing his lips against the side of your throat. "The guys are always here too, Taeyong's girlfriend and our family. Don't feel like you have to go through any of this alone."
"Promise me you'll call every day? After your shifts? Come home during your breaks?" your hands fidget against his shoulders as they dip beneath your slip, gripping at his bare waist, eager for him. His hips buck into the air a little. You're breathless. "Please?"
"Whatever you want," there's a tentative motion as he strokes a line up your spine. His hands cup your cheeks. "I'll give you everything."
With the tip of his tongue, he nudges your lips apart and slips past. Jaehyun deepens the kiss by nibbling the corner of your lip, slipping into your mouth as you gasp at his little bites, swallowing his moans when you wiggle around in his lap, grinding down slowly.
One thing you and him do very well is kissing. You used to kiss until your mouths would begin to tingle with numbness and you'd have to separate to catch a breath before diving right back in.
Jaehyun tastes the same. His kisses are addictive, hot and demanding like the man himself. "Let me love you in the meantime. Let me spoil my gorgeous wife until the second I leave."
"Jaehyun, the guys are outside," your husband hasn't kept his hands to himself, palms drifting lower to hold the swell of your ass as you attempt to sit up and off him. But the man isn't having it.
"I'm sure the guys are all at the lake or goofing off somewhere," Jaehyun muttered, his lips dragging down the line of your throat to leave marks as he pleases.
"Can't believe you invited the guys on our trip...ah," your complaints weaken out as he gently teases your nipples through the fabric of the slip, touching the wet bud of the other until you start to squirm. "Ah! Babe, knock it off," you squeak, glancing at the door. Your knees tighten their grip at his sides.
"Can't help myself. Got a hot, pregnant wife sittin' on me," it's meant to be a joke but all it does is send your mind on an out-of-control tangent. His eyes drop. "Now, are you going to take care of the problem, or will I need to do it myself?"
"Not my problem that you popped a boner," a squeal of surprise passes from you when he rolls you onto your back, switching your position easily. There's something hungry, unbridled and impatient in Jaehyun's eyes as he regards you. You flush at his heavy gaze and spread your legs so he can nestle further between your thighs. "Jae."
"What does my sweet, gorgeous wife want?" his thumbs slide across your nipples as he takes a deep breath.
"I...fuck, Jae," you huff and grind up against his crotch. Your throat feels like it's tightening. Heat pools in your tummy as the flush moves further down, towards your tits, neck. "I want your mouth."
"Good thing I'm hungry, too,” he smirks.
"Jaehyun," you snap at his teasing, arching when he pulls down the straps and slides the nightgown down your frame.
"Can't wait to taste you," the bottom hem goes as far as your middle before bunching. A bite to your nipple has you whining, trying to muffle the noises by biting the knuckle of your thumb. "Lift yourself up a little so I can get this out of my way."
Your panties join the crumple on the floor. Then, you spread your legs so that one wraps itself around his shoulder while the other is lifted up and set in the crook of his elbow. His hands lay flat on your belly, right above your pelvis. He nips and kisses all the soft, unmarred skin that he's familiar with. Your heart begins to flutter, making you tingle down below.
"I can't believe that I'll miss you being all round with my baby," Jaehyun murmurs against your stomach. Your body aches for him as the days he has to leave start to come close. There's still time, but that won't matter soon when the separation will set in.
"At least you'll be home during your breaks," you gulp and your head dips back. A light kiss is placed directly on your clit. "That'll make me feel a little better. We'll see you and you'll spoil the hell out of me with your undying love and affection."
"Exactly. The time will be fast, so let me enjoy the moments I still have with you," Jaehyun slides your labia apart and licks a broad strip from your clit to your core. "Mhm. So damn perfect, it tastes good, too."
You squeeze his arm tightly and gasp, his breath is hot and making your whole body tingle with sensitivity as you writhe against the sheets, and he takes this as a signal to keep eating you out.
The long length of his tongue darts inside your cunt as he swirls the tip over the sides. He goes deeper, spreading you wider for his convenience and flicks at a sensitive part that has your legs tensing. He watches, with pleasure, how you shiver when he curls his tongue upward. Then, he presses right under your hood, applying a relentless pressure to the aching spot that has you trembling. The muffled and delicious gasps and whines of ecstasy are music to his ears, as are the satisfied moans you make every now and then when his lips engulf your clit, the vibrations that shudder through the sensitive organ adding to the intensity.
His hand continued to caress your belly. The reminder that a life was slowly forming in you both warms him and makes his throat clench at the same time. He will miss it. Miss your swollen belly, your changing figure, your shifting moods, and cravings, and how his little spitfire will get all hormonal on him.
Jaehyun retracts the point of his tongue from inside and replaces it with two of his fingers. A continuous stream of arousal slips from his digits when he sinks in. He thumbs the side of your engorged clitoris as he pushes into you as slow as his body would allow. There were times he wasn't willing to take it slow, was almost rough, but now was not one of them. He only wanted to hear you fall apart before his departure and milk it for all it's worth.
Fingers moving expertly in you, he moves up to kiss your breast, taking the other nipple into his mouth. His tongue swipes across the protruding nub in a circular motion, pinning the pebble with the point, as his other hand continues to stroke you in perfect harmony. Jaehyun pinches your nipple, lashing the hard, reddening, little peak until you moan at him, back arching and your knees knocking his shoulders.
"What else do you want, my love?" Jaehyun breathes, curling his fingers. "Tell me."
"Jae," you breathed out.
“Tell me, babe. Come on, use that pretty voice of yours,” Jaehyun coaxed.
“Inside!” you gasped, your voice barely a whisper.
"Inside? Yeah?" he murmurs. He laps a bead of your cream from the corner of his lips. Aroused, your nipples stand firm as he thumbs them again.
"Put your cock in me," your nails drag a line over his shoulder. "Make love to me."
"Damn, my baby's so impatient," the tone in his voice, all rugged and husky from not saying a word until now, goes straight to the center of your core. The slight quaking that makes itself present in his legs goes unseen to you.
Jaehyun captures you with a brief yet searing kiss. You hum with delight, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, holding on as he presses his lips to yours. You nudge his nose with the side of yours, offering a smile when he looks into your eyes. The moment lingers for several seconds with him observing you as you catch your breath.
"Tell me," Jaehyun touches his forehead to your collarbone, nuzzling his head on your skin as he feels your pussy constrict around him. He flips his head and kisses where your shoulder meets the collar. "Tell me how you want it."
"Love me, babe. Please," you whisper, eyes meeting him. The head of his cock pushes into you just enough for him to rock deeper in and stretch you slowly. He drags his length through your swollen pussy, slipping in and out to coax himself hard again and again, always returning to his place inside of you, opening and filling your throbbing heat, molding your softness and wetness around his hard cock.
A ragged exhale leaves his lungs as Jaehyun runs his hand down the outside of your leg, clutching your ankle in order to wrap around him. You wiggle against his torso and then rest your leg higher up along the center of his back, knee nudging his tail bone, wanting him deeper inside of you, rolling your hips and chasing the high he knows that you desperately need. Jaehyun rewards you for it by sliding in more, up to the root.
"Oh, shit!" you curse and tighten around him.
He's silent; he loves having sex with you, but there is no room to talk when all you can hear are the squelch of his thrusts and the rickety noise made when his cock enters your throbbing sex and his heavy grunts.
"Almost there?" Jaehyun is quite close, breathing heavily as his skin starts to shimmer in the sunlight.
He pushes inside of you until his hips knock your own. He circles his pelvis, massaging your clit with his dick. The pressure on the swollen nub has you whimpering, struggling to meet his movements until it starts to sting and ache from the constant stimulation and you begin to move away, but he stops the motion with one of his big hands splayed on your hip and holds you steady.
“Jae!” you cried out.
"Hm. Is this what you want? You want this?" he groans, rocking his hips, punctuating the word with another nudge of his cock against you.
A yes bubbles from you, the word leaving your mouth followed by the most desperate moan when the swollen glands hit just the right spot. The ridges on his pelvic bone brush along the top of your slit and bump your clit each time his hips rut forward. The thickness of his penis is evident as he repeatedly pushes and pushes until you take every inch inside.
"Gonna cum?" the man mutters in his most raspiest tone. "It's okay to cum," he grunts, pounding into you harder than before. "Gonna love you the entire time...even if it takes me all night."
You sob with delight as a flash of electricity moves from your pelvis to the very top of your scalp. It was white behind your closed eyes as a shattering pleasure moved down the middle of you. "Ah! Shit. Oh, Jaehyun!"
A single moan escapes his parted lips, sounding strangled and wrecked, before Jaehyun catches and swallows it. He moans it deep into your mouth with one last hard shove, the final shove of his cock. You feel the burst and heat spreading inside. He makes a beautiful face, gasping with the sensation that overtakes him and you catch his orgasm just in time. It's euphoria the way his expression, eyebrows upturned, lips slightly opened. He moans out a gasp and throws his head back, full and handsome, before tipping his chin and pressing his forehead against yours.
You touch his jawline lightly with a fingertip and he opens his eyes to look into yours, finding those crinkles in the corners. The sweat is coating his skin and you admire the red that paints his cheeks and lips. You reach up and run a gentle hand over the skin there, down his chest, before finally letting it settle over his rapidly thumping heartbeat.
"You've made me a complete mess," you huff out with laughter, full of warmth. The light-hearted sound makes a smile appear on Jaehyun's face.
“Don’t worry,” Jaehyun chuckled, “I plan on fixing it for you in a minute. Think you can handle another round?”
"Definitely."
Some months later
"Look at my little princess getting all big," Jaehyun cooed from the tablet screen in your hands. "Daddy can't wait to be home."
"Oh, you care more about your daughter than your wife now, huh?" you situate the phone on the phone stand so that you could bounce the baby in your lap, wiping her chin after the last of her suckling your breast. It was close to time for her to nap, the lightness in the tone of her fussing notifying you.
"I love both my girls. I can't wait to see you both," he mutters, his gaze softening at the two of you.
"We both miss you," you coo, standing to pace about the room with the infant at your chest. There was no stopping the fond look that passed onto your face. He'd been a daddy for three months, was lucky to be there for your labor, and held his beautiful baby girl for the first time in the delivery room. From that moment, your heart had never been fuller. "Here, honey, say hi to daddy."
The phone was in position so the small baby girl could be seen in your arms, waving at the camera with her fist.
"That's daddy, yeah, that's him! That's daddy," you whispered sweetly, resting a kiss on the downy hair atop her tiny head as she babbled. "Say 'hi!'"
"Daddy will be home soon in a few hours," he says, his free hand raising in a wave to the phone. "Then, daddy can hug and kiss his little princess for real. All good in the nursery? Do I need to bring anything home with me?"
"No, the room is finally fully finished, thanks to the family and the guys. No toys needed, no blankets or clothes," you beam. "But... you can pick up her a few diapers."
You continue on walking the baby around until she begins to doze off, arms twitching in her sleep, her head laying on your chest, fuzzing and twitching like a kitten. A wide grin spread across the man's face, warm and genuine at the sight, feeling like something within his chest had been suddenly twisted in a pleasing way.
"Only a few more months and I'll officially be home, my love. Then we'll be together, our whole little family. My whole world," he smiled, making silly faces through the tablet. "Babe, I gotta get going now. Johnny is almost here to pick me up."
“Hurry home, fast,” you urge.
“As fast as Johnny can drive,” Jaehyun calls as a goodbye and winks at you.
“Oh god. That might get you home quicker, but I am begging you,” you plead, “Don't let him speed.”
"No promises!" he calls as a goodbye and winks at you.
With that, the call is done and you situate the baby on the playmat, turning on a baby video with music as she snoozes away. You sit, with legs curled under you, waiting for his arrival.
Ten minutes, fifteen minutes, half an hour and still no Jaehyun. He should've been back by now.
After a couple more minutes, the door unlocks and you look over to the door, your husband comes barreling through as quick as his legs will allow. "Jaehyun!"
His feet carry him in an instant, catching your jaw gently, cupping it before dragging the pad of his thumb over your cheek with a love-sick and tired smile gracing his features.
"I'm home," he whispers softly, lifting you up in a bear-like hug and carrying you the short distance to the sofa before setting you in his lap. "God, how have you been, sweetheart? How's my baby girl?"
"Good and asleep. Tuckered herself out today, too," you lean over him, peering over the back to spot the infant sleeping. "We're both really glad you're finally home."
You breathe out, laying a loving kiss against his brow. "How long is this break? Do I get to keep you to myself for longer than a day this time?"
"This time is a week," he grinned and hugged you closer, hands going up and down the span of your back. "Just a week. You can keep me to yourself for a week. Plus my hair is a bit longer now for you to pull..." he jokes, wiggling his eyebrows and making you swat at his broad chest.
"Quit! The baby is sleeping," you chide him. But, Jaehyun was quick to make up for his lack of brain cells by leaving open-mouthed, lingering kisses over your neck, not holding back while nipping gently here and there. Your breathless hush becomes a broken groan.
"Did I ever tell you," his voice dropped, turning rough, as he grazed his teeth over the shell of your ear. His smile was wicked and inviting. He'd never looked as handsome as in this moment to you. "I love you so, so much?"
You clear your throat with a chuff, fight a shiver, and narrow your eyes at your husband. "Many times, but remind me once again."
Jaehyun looks you in the eyes, giving your buttocks a hearty squeeze. "Let me prove it, instead."
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IT TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE [1]
Summary: An arrangement of convenience with Sunghoon doesn't go as planned when you get introduced to Jake. Things get complicated and suddenly you have to wonder how you can love two people at once without anyone getting hurt. Jake might just ruin your life...
Warnings: language, eventual sexual themes
A/N: Literally would not get out of my brain and the entire plot summary is written down in my notes app. I hope y'all enjoy, and please send me feedback!! Chapter isn't incredibly long because I want to test it out and see what y'all think.
Most people tend to forget - or pretend to forget - that idols have obligations and people in their lives pre-fame. For some idols, those lives are crushed and erased by companies from public view; but the people in their lives from before, the people who knew them the longest, still know them and remember that past.
It’s kind of like when you’re traveling through a town. It’s all foreign and new to you, but to many people in that town, it’s familiar and old. The people who know it best can find pain and love and suffering in that town.
For you, the town is the ice rink.
It’s hard to describe the exact smell of an ice rink. It smells like rubber and metal and cold. There’s really no other way to describe it. It is cold, obviously, but it’s a synthetic cold. Obviously.
Still, it’s comforting. It reminds of a blustery winter day when the weather dips below freezing and you know it’s going to snow soon, dampening the sounds of the outside and acting as a night light as the lights from the city reflect off the white shroud in the dark. That kind of peace and comfort is hard to replicate, but the ice rink does it for you. Maybe it’s because you spent most of your waking moments on the ice that you feel that way, the sides of your skates digging into your ankles to stabilize them, the rush of wind as you skate to prepare for your next jump, getting enough speed to launch into the air.
For you, the town is also Sunghoon.
You remembered Sunghoon before he was a famous idol. You knew the young Sunghoon, the rising skater Sunghoon, the incredible skater Sunghoon possibly destined for the Olympics, and, now, idol Sunghoon.
Sunghoon had shocked everyone at the ice rink when he announced he was pursuing life as an idol. Everyone but you.
“Do you think… do you think it would be okay if I stopped skating?” He’d whispered it so quietly over the phone one night that the static almost drowned his soft voice out. You held the phone close to your ear, rolling onto your side in your bed to get closer to his voice. His call had woken you up around two in the morning and yet you had never felt so awake. Your heart was pounding and your hands felt clammy as you gripped your phone, staring at your wall in the dark.
“I think…” you paused, unsure. “I think you should do what makes you feel happy. What makes you excited when you wake up in the morning. If that’s not skating now, if it’s not skating ever again, that’s fine. That’s what I think.”
You heard Sunghoon’s steady breathing over the phone and you thought about the first time you’d met him at the rink. You’d both been young, steady on your skates but unsteady in nearly every other aspect of your young lives. You had gravitated toward each other due to your work ethic and dry humor. He’d been the first person you’d call when a new movie came out because you wanted to see it with him. You were the first person he’d call when he wanted to try a new restaurant because he wanted your honest opinion on the food. The two of you studied together when you could, skated together when you could, and trained together whenever possible. Everyone thought the two of you were dating, but the thought never crossed your minds. You simply loved Sunghoon and he loved you, a found family as a result of your passion for skating.
Which is why he had called you to talk about one of the biggest decisions of his life.
“What do you want to do, like, instead? If anything, I guess,” you whispered in the early morning and cringed. You went for supportive but landed somewhere around awkward.
Sunghoon laughed humorlessly. “I want to audition to be an idol.”
You smiled. If anyone could make it as an idol…
“When you become an idol can I get a ticket to your concerts?”
Sunghoon laughed for real this time, and you rolled over onto your back as you felt Sunghoon relax over the phone.
“No way, loser. I’ll ask them to charge you more.”
He didn’t. When he had his first concert as an idol with his group after winning a grueling competition, he gave one ticket to you and the other to his mom. He even took a photo with you. “Anything for my fans,” he’d said, winking at you. You gagged and flipped him off behind his mom’s back, blushing slightly when you caught one of his group member’s eye mid-gag. The other boy had just smiled and shook his head as Sunghoon made a face at you, turning sweet when his mother turned around to hug him tightly again, proud of her son. He’d flipped you off back behind his mom’s back.
Now, for the first time in all the years you’d known Sunghoon, you felt uncomfortable in front of him, sitting across from one another in the private dining room of an overly expensive restaurant.
“I didn’t know.” Again with the whisper, like he was scared of what you would think. It was the same whisper he’d had when he had called you about becoming an idol.
“It’s okay. We can figure something out,” you reassured him, feeling anything but sure yourself.
“Of course they would do this, God,” Sunghoon breathed out, running his hands through his hair and hanging his head. “I am so sorry, Y/N. So, so sorry.”
You sighed, standing to go behind Sunghoon. Rubbing his shoulders through his dress shirt, you sucked in a deep breath.
“We both knew they wanted something from you when you switched, ah, career paths. If this is it, then this is it. We can figure it out later, but if we try to change their minds now it’ll just get ugly.”
Arranged dating. That’s what they’d proposed when they sat the two of you down for dinner. When Sunghoon had given up figure skating his parents had been supportive but displeased. He’d given up a shot at the Olympics after all. His parents had made him promise he wouldn’t worry them with idol life. The long hours, harsh environments, and dating scandals rocking the industry had made them worry, though. They’d met with the company and scrambled to find anything to make Sunghoon’s life more… stable. And they had landed on you. You had been a staple in his life for years. Those pre-idol obligations had come crashing down on the two of you on a Saturday evening, a rare Saturday Sunghoon had off. Arranged dating with the intent to marry, it seemed. They didn’t want to worry about all of Sunghoon’s future, the volatile nature of idol life making them nervous.
You were the perfect candidate.
“I feel like I’m in one of those, ‘My mom sold me to One Direction” Wattpad fics.’”
“Wattpad?” Sunghoon frowned, turning to look at you.
You rolled your eyes. “Nevermind, loser.”
“Wait, am I One Direction right now?”
“Yeah, all four members.”
“There’s five of them, stupidhead,” Sunghoon replied, smug.
“Yeah, but you’re no Zayn. I’d gladly be dating him,” you joked, flicking the back of Sunghoon’s head. He stood up to face you, indignant.
“Hey! I’m pretty good looking, too.”
You crinkled your nose at him, looking him up and down.
“That is no way to look at your boyfriend,” he joked, and you couldn’t help but laugh at how ridiculous the whole thing was. You couldn’t believe your own parents agreed to this, you couldn’t believe Sunghoon’s parents even dreamt this up, and you couldn’t believe you were in a terrible fanfiction trope. You wanted to cry or maybe laugh or maybe just sleep for a few years until your problems became less glaring.
“Hey,” Sunghoon said, his hand sliding down your arm to hold your hand softly. “I’m not asking you to fall in love with me like that. They’ll feel better when my career becomes more secure.”
You sighed, looking down. “I just don’t know what the rules are for this.”
He scoffed. “What do your One Direction fanfictions say?”
You raised your head and stared at him, unamused. “First of all, I never read those. Second of all, if I had, say, read them, I guess the rules would say we could act as we always have. You’re not a good actor -” you held up a hand to stop him as he opened his mouth to say something snarky, no doubt “- so we won’t try and act any differently around your parents.”
Sunghoon nodded, still annoyed. “What about actually dating…”
He didn’t finish. You knew what he meant though. Actually dating someone you were attracted to romantically. It didn’t hurt when he said it, it just made you feel a deep, aching sadness in your stomach. If you dated someone you actually liked, you’d be labeled a cheater and ostracized if it was ever found out. If Sunghoon dated someone he actually liked… it would be the same but worse. There were no winners at this particular junction, no way to find a new route home in your hometown.
You shrugged at him. “It doesn’t look good. Why? You have a crush on someone?”
Sunghoon rolled his eyes at your sing-songy voice. He pushed you away gently. “No, but I would like to find true love.”
You batted your eyes at him and he gagged, smiling as he turned to hug you. A hug from Sunghoon was pretty rare, and you held on tight.
“We’ll be fine,” you mumbled into his shoulder. “You can’t scare me off that easily. I remember when you had food poisoning and still insisted on skating and-”
He pushed you away. “Oh my, God, would you shut the fuck up.”
You laughed, throwing your head back as you turned to bump your shoulder into his. The two of you walked toward the exit of the restaurant, him to his car and you, in the next few minutes, to the subway station to take a late train home.
Sunghoon stopped by the door, turning to face you quickly. “Want to come over next Friday and meet the others? I’ll tell them about what’s going on and then you can meet them. Okay?” You nodded. It felt slightly embarrassing, but it felt right that his bandmates knew what was going on between the two of you. After years of telling them nothing was going on with you and Sunghoon it would seem odd you were suddenly dating the man without the context surrounding the arrangement. Embarrassing to say out loud, maybe. But telling them kept some part of your pride intact.
“I’ll see you next Friday, then. Around eight?” you asked, checking your phone calendar to make sure you weren’t scheduled for work.
Sunghoon nodded, punching you lightly on the arm as he headed out. You plopped down in a plush chair at the front and waited for ten minutes before leaving after, taking your sweet time to get to the subway station.
It was a nice night, slightly chilly but clear. The rush of traffic wasn’t slowing down in the city, yet the sidewalks weren’t crowded. Your pace was leisurely as your mind mulled over the events of the night. You wondered how your parents had agreed to it, but you figured they always thought you and Sunghoon were an item and felt it was natural. It stung a bit to think about, and your eyes got wet at the thought. You blinked back the emotions and trudged on, reaching the subway and taking the late train home. Miraculously, the train wasn’t crowded yet for a Saturday night and you found a seat. The swaying of the car felt relaxing on your suddenly weary body and you slumped back into the seat. You were almost dreading next Friday, but a small part of you was looking forward to meeting Sunghoon’s bandmates. You hadn’t met them, truly met them, except in passing at concerts. Now that his past and his present were merging you would finally have the chance to meet them.
All week you amped yourself up to meet Sunghoon’s bandmates. You finally felt ready as you got out of the cab behind their dorm on Friday and a staff member ushered you inside.
But when you finally met the members there was only one way to describe it: A Shitshow. And it was all because of one man in particular.
Fucking Jake Sim.
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𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 (𝐡𝐲𝐮𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬)
situationship!hyung line x fem!reader
genre: angst
warnings: suggestive, they're basically just toxic and lowkey (highkey) mean smh, jealous!hoon
word count: between 500-680 words per member
↝ dazzlingjaeyun's bookshelf
‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙·̩̩̥͙*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊
- ', lee heeseung ; 496 words ꒱ ↷
heeseung always told you not to worry about her.
the way he said it, so casual, so dismissive, made you feel small every time. as if your feelings were insignificant, like your concerns were nothing but a byproduct of your own insecurity.
tonight was no different. he’d spent most of the party talking to her – the girl he always swore was "just a friend." you watched as they laughed together, heads close, his hand lingering on her arm just a second too long. your stomach twisted, but you bit your tongue. it wasn’t the first time, and you knew it wouldn’t be the last.
when you finally found the courage to ask him about it later, as the party died down and the two of you stood alone in a dimly lit corner, his response was as predictable as it was infuriating.
“you’re overthinking this again,” he said, his voice low and calm, like he was trying to soothe a child. “i told you, there’s nothing between us.”
you crossed your arms, the weight of everything unsaid pressing on your chest. “you’re always with her, heeseung. you never act like that with me.”
he sighed, running a hand through his hair, looking more exasperated than guilty. “we’re not even dating,” he shot back, eyes narrowing as if you were the unreasonable one. “i don’t know why you’re making this a big deal. you knew that from the start.”
the words cut deep, sharper than you expected. he was right, technically. you were never officially anything, never put a label on whatever this was. but that didn’t stop the jealousy from eating away at you, or the way your heart sank every time he chose her over you.
“so, what?” you asked, voice shaking despite your best efforts to sound strong. “i’m not allowed to feel anything? i’m not allowed to care when you spend all your time with her?”
heeseung stepped closer, his fingers wrapping around your wrist – not tight, but firm enough to make sure you wouldn’t walk away. “i’m not with her, okay? stop imagining things. you always do this, blowing everything out of proportion.”
you shook your head, yanking your wrist free, your chest heaving with the weight of his words. “but you are always with her, heeseung. i’m not imagining that.”
for a moment, something flickered in his eyes – guilt, maybe, or hesitation – but just as quickly, it was gone. he shrugged, and the indifference in his expression shattered whatever hope you’d been clinging to. “you don’t have to stay, you know,” he said, voice ever so soft – a sharp contrast to the cruelty of his words. “we never promised anything to each other. if you don’t like it, you can leave.”
the silence that followed was deafening. heeseung watched you, arms crossed like he was daring you to go, daring you to make a choice.
but it wasn’t that simple. it never was.
and you hated that, despite everything, you stayed.
other members under the cut!
- ', park jongseong ; 684 words ꒱ ↷
you had almost forgotten what it felt like to see jay’s name light up your phone. it had been weeks since he left you on read, a silence that gnawed at your insides until you convinced yourself that you were done waiting. but the moment you opened the message, your heart raced.
hey, you up?
you hesitated, fingers hovering over the screen before typing back.
sure
when he arrived, his casual demeanor filled the room, a smirk playing at the corners of his mouth. “hey,” he said, leaning against the wall, arms crossed. “missed you.”
“missed me?” you echoed, trying to keep your tone light even as memories of his absence washed over you. “you didn’t even text...”
he stepped closer, his eyes softening as he watched you. “i know. i’m sorry for dropping off the map. life got crazy. but i’m here now. can we just forget about that?”
you felt your heart flutter at his words, yet a cautious part of you hesitated. it had been so long since you’d last spoken. still, you found yourself leaning into him as he drew closer, a familiar warmth radiating between you.
without thinking, jay closed the gap and cupped your face in his hands, tilting your chin up to meet his gaze. “can i?” he asked softly, his eyes searching yours for permission.
you swallowed, uncertainty flashing through your mind. but before you could respond, he leaned in and pressed his lips against yours, igniting a spark that sent warmth coursing through your body. the kiss was sweet and intoxicating, melting away your doubts as you lost yourself in him.
your hands found their way to his hair, pulling him closer as you surrendered to the moment. the world around you seemed to fade as he deepened the kiss.
his hands roamed down your sides, fingertips brushing against your skin, igniting a rush of heat. you felt a thrill at first, but then an unease crept in when he attempted to lift your shirt. that familiar warmth faded, replaced by a gnawing thought.
you pulled back slightly, breathless and searching his eyes. “wait, jay…”
“what?” he murmured, his voice low and husky, still caught up in the moment.
“were you… while you were away, were you with someone else?” you blurted out, vulnerability creeping into your voice.
jay’s expression shifted instantly, irritation replacing the softness that had just been there. “seriously? you’re going to ruin this moment with your overthinking?”
“i’m just asking,” you protested, feeling the warmth of the moment evaporate. “you’ve been gone for weeks. what was i supposed to think?”
“you’re overreacting,” he shot back, frustration lacing his words. “i told you, life gets busy. i didn’t have time for you. but you know i like you. can’t that be enough?”
“so, i’m just supposed to accept that?” you replied, your heart sinking as the sweet connection you’d felt moments ago felt tainted now. “you show up after weeks of silence and expect everything to be fine?”
jay’s demeanor shifted even more, annoyance replacing the previous sweetness in his voice. “you know what? maybe you should just stop expecting so much. it’s not like we’re a thing. you can’t play the victim every time i need space.”
“am i just supposed to just wait for you to come back whenever it’s convenient?” you shot back, anger rising. “this isn’t fair, jay. i thought we had... something.”
“something?” he scoffed, stepping back, creating distance that felt more comfortable for him. “you act like i owe you something just because we’re fucking. i didn’t ask you to wait around for me.”
the air between you thickened with tension, and the warmth you once felt began to feel suffocating.
“maybe i don’t want this anymore,” you said quietly, hoping to pierce through the walls he’d built around himself.
“then why don’t you walk away?” he shot back, a cruel smile forming on his lips. “i’m not forcing you to stay and i’m not chasing you around either, but you’re still here. if you really wanted to be gone, you’d have done it already.”
- ', sim jaeyun ; 668 words ꒱ ↷
the atmosphere was thick with unspoken tension as you stood in your dimly lit living room. you had been trying to move on, to enjoy yourself, but the moment you saw him leaning against your doorframe, eyes darker than the shadows around him, everything came flooding back.
“you didn’t call,” he said, voice low but laced with something sharp, an accusation that felt more like a challenge.
you shrugged, trying to appear unaffected, though his presence stirred something deep within. “didn’t think it mattered.”
“didn’t think it mattered?” he repeated, disbelief etched across his features. “it’s been weeks. you think just because we’re not dating means you can ghost me? that’s not how this works.”
he stepped closer, fingers brushing your arm, sending shivers down your spine. “of course it matters,” he muttered, his voice dripping with a possessiveness that made your heart race. “you’re mine.”
the words twisted in your chest, a fleeting warmth quickly replaced by cold reality. he never said more than that. mine – but never us. the possessiveness in his tone was suffocating, yet it wasn’t love. not the kind you craved, anyway.
“yours?” you echoed, bitterness creeping into your voice. “but i’m not enough to keep you.” the memory of him with other girls, laughing, flirting even, flooded your mind.
jake’s jaw tightened, but he didn’t deny it. he never did. his gaze flickered, a flash of something unrecognizable, but it was gone before you could grasp it.
“come on,” he said, leaning in closer, his breath warm against your skin. “don’t be dramatic. you know how this works. we have fun. it doesn’t have to mean anything more.”
“fun?” you shot back, anger sparking in your chest. “you find this fun? cause that’s not how i’d call it.”
he scoffed, the corner of his mouth quirking up in that infuriating smirk that always made your heart race. “then maybe you should stop expecting something that was never on the table. you’re making this complicated, and you know i hate complications.”
you crossed your arms, feeling the weight of his words. “and you think it’s my fault for not reaching out? maybe i thought you’d actually care if i was gone.”
“well, maybe i wouldn’t have had to think about it if you’d just called,” he replied, frustration spilling into his tone. “you don’t get to just disappear and expect me to act like everything’s fine.”
the tension escalated, and you felt a sting of betrayal rise within you. “you don’t care about how this affects me at all, do you?” you almost whispered, pain creeping into your voice.
“not really,” he replied, his honesty cutting deeper than you expected. “you should know by now that this is just... whatever. it’s nothing serious. you’re not the only one i’m seeing, and you should stop acting like you own me.”
without another word, you turned away, knowing he wouldn’t follow. he never stayed when it counted. you were tired of pretending you didn’t want more, of pretending that his words didn’t cut deep every time you heard them.
“you think you can just walk away?” he called after you, his tone shifting slightly, a mix of irritation and something else you couldn’t quite place.
“you don’t get to decide that for me, jake,” you replied, voice steady, though your heart raced. “cause newsflash – you don’t own me either.”
“that’s where you’re wrong,” he said, stepping forward, his expression hardening. “i do own you. you might not want to admit it, but you’re not going anywhere. not when you know you’d miss this. and you do know it.”
the truth hung heavy in the air, suffocating in its finality. he was right about one thing: deep down, you knew you wouldn’t easily let go, no matter how hard you tried. and as you walked away, the familiar ache settled in your chest – knowing he would never give you what you truly wanted, but somehow, you would always find yourself drawn back into his orbit.
- ', park sunghoon ; 629 words ꒱ ↷
sunghoon never wanted to be with you – not officially, at least. he made that painfully clear from the start. "no labels, no commitments," he had said, and you’d agreed, thinking you could handle it. but as time went on, the lines between what you were and what you weren’t started to blur.
you’d barely finished laughing at something your friend said when sunghoon appeared, eyes dark with barely restrained anger. he had been watching you all night, but it wasn’t until he saw you standing too close to another guy that he snapped. now, he was pulling you into the corner of the room, his grip on your wrist unrelenting.
“what the hell do you think you’re doing?” he demanded, voice low and sharp.
you blinked at him, incredulous. “talking. what does it look like?”
sunghoon’s jaw clenched, his eyes narrowing. “it looks like you were flirting.”
you laughed bitterly, yanking your arm free from his hold. “flirting? i was just talking to a friend, sunghoon. why do you even care? we’re not together, remember?”
that was always your go-to defense, the one truth that should have shielded you from this exact situation. but sunghoon didn’t back down. he never did.
“don’t act stupid,” he snapped, stepping closer until you were practically pressed against the wall. “i don’t need to put a label on this to make it clear. you’re mine. i don’t want other guys near you.”
your heart raced, frustration and confusion swirling inside you. “yours? you don’t even want to be with me. you’ve said that a hundred times. no relationship, no commitment. so why does it matter?”
his face hardened, a muscle in his jaw twitching as he stared at you, unblinking. “just because i don’t want to be tied down doesn’t mean i’m okay with you hanging around other guys.”
you shook your head, disbelief flooding through you. “do you even hear yourself? you can’t have it both ways, sunghoon. you don’t get to act possessive when you’ve made it clear this is nothing to you.”
he sighed, eyes still cold. “i never said this was nothing. i just don’t want all the... drama that comes with it. but you,” he stepped even closer, his voice dropping to a near whisper, “you don’t get to act like you’re free to do whatever you want. not when it comes to other guys.”
the hypocrisy of it all made your blood boil. “so, what? you can see whoever you want, keep me at arm’s length, but i’m not allowed to talk to another guy?”
sunghoon’s gaze darkened, his fingers curling into fists at his sides. “i’m not seeing anyone else,” he said, his voice tight. “but that’s not the point. the point is, i don’t want you with anyone else. it’s that simple.”
the 'simplicity' of it, the stark unfairness, made you want to scream. “and what do i get out of this?” you asked, voice shaking with pent-up emotion. “i’m not yours, sunghoon. you’ve said it yourself, over and over again. you don’t want anything real, and yet you expect me to just wait around while you keep doing this?”
his eyes flickered, something unreadable passing through them, but he stayed silent. he couldn’t answer that. he wouldn’t.
“exactly,” you muttered, shaking your head. “you want control without commitment. you don’t want to be with me, but you can’t stand the thought of someone else wanting me.”
his silence was deafening, the unspoken truth hanging heavy between you. he didn’t deny it. he never would. you were caught in his web, and he knew it. you could feel the weight of his possessiveness, like invisible chains tightening around you every time he pulled you back, refusing to let you go, but never offering anything more.
‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙·̩̩̥͙*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊
© dazzlingjaeyun, 2024. please do not copy.
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Preview: Heaven and Back || SJY, PSH
In which you buy leashes for your favourite pup and kitten.
Pairings: kittyHybrid!Sunghoon × puppyHybrid!Jake × sugarmommy!reader
Warnings: SMUT MINORS DNI, hoon and Jake are hybrids, not much hybrid stuff just tails and ears, dom!reader, sub!JakeHoon, threesome, anal sex, p in v, oral (f and m), leashes (on JakeHoon), degradation, praise, swearing, choking, breath play, masturbating (m), reader is Jakehoon's sugar mommy, unprotected sex (not for you), edging, cumming inside, use of 'mommy', includes Yunjin of Lessreafim
A/N:: so this is just some porn for yall which I will be posting three days from now! I specifically wrote this for my beloved @jaeyunluvr who helped me make the banner (she's my designer genius) and I hope she'll go mental when I post the smut hehe
Song rec: Heaven and Back by Chase Atlantic
Taglist: Open
Due on: 5/11/24 (Subject to change)
“Whose great idea was it to visit this place again?” Yunjin tilted her head back at you, “Because I am never leaving.”
“Freak.” You chuckled, running your hand through some soft foam objects of whose purpose you had no idea, “And it was my great idea, thank you very much.” Yunjin turned to you holding up a million scrunchies in her hands.
“Buy these for me.” She said with a dead-pan face making you burst into laughter, “Oh come on, you’re rich enough,” She looked greedily down at the velvety hair-ties, “Please, mommy?”
“Huh Yunjin, never call me that ever again.” You said in between snorts of laughter, “Plus, I’m here for some more expensive stuff.”
“Babe, we’re in a literal sex store.” Yunjin said, eyeing some very pink vibrators hanging in the corner, “Everything here is expensive.”
“Fuck capitalism dude.” You sighed, walking deeper into the large store. Everything In there transported you into a retro-american Lana Del Rey music video, with nostalgic pinks, reds and blues covering every inch of it. You wondered mindlessly what on earth scrunchies were doing at a place like this, when you heard Yunjin gasp.
“Y/N look!” She said excitedly like a child in a candy shop, “Look at these beauties.” You followed your eyes up to where she was pointing, and softly chuckled, sleeping your hands into the pockets of your pants.
Leashes.
Gloriously long, magnificently coloured, leashes.
“Are you alright hun?” You said, raising your hand up to pull one of the black coloured ones down from its hanger, “It's not like you to suggest leashes.” Your fingers toyed with the metal chain of the scandalous thing in your hand. You tugged at the price tag to see how much the gorgeous thing was worth.
After all, you only wanted the best for your boys.
“Well isn't this cheap?” You handed the leash to Yunjin who widened her eyes and looked at you as if you had gone positively insane.
“Cheap?” She whispered dramatically, “150 dollars is cheap to you?” She scoffed before she put the leash back on its hanger, “Damn mommy, you are rich.”
“Careful Jinnie, you’re still my assistant.” You chuckled, as you pulled your hands out of your pockets and placed one each on your hip, “Well, I think I’m gonna take two of these.”
“For the boys?” Yunjin asked, putting a thoughtful finger to her chin, “Hmm..I think the blue one and the white one will be nice!”
“Good eye.” You complimented her, letting her pull those ones off. You took the white one in your hand, which had a little bow attached to it, thinking about how cute Jake would look in it. The blue would certainly suit Sunghoon, what with his porcelain skin suiting almost any and every colour.
“Should I go and ring them up then?” Yunjin asked to which you nodded.
“Oh and Jinnie.” You called just as she was about to leave, “Get as many scrunchies as you want.”
Yunjin smiled at you brightly and skipped off to find scrunchies in her favourite colour, leaving you alone to explore more of the shop. From the exterior of the shop, you would never have guessed that it was such a large one, with the endless rows of goodies never coming to a stop. You ought to have brought Jake and Sunghoon here one day; you knew they’d certainly enjoy it.
From the day you’d met both of them, you’ve practically been inseparable. Being a hot-shot business woman in an industry dominated by old men and young fools took a toll on your mental health. If only you had someone to help you take all that stress out. It was Yunjin who had convinced you to follow the ridiculous idea of having a sugar baby–or perhaps even two.
And that was how a puppy-hybrid Jake and kitten-hybrid Sunghoon came into your life, eagerly helping you relieve your stress after a long day signing paperwork and calculating the misogyny. But they had grown into more than just average sex toys. They were also the careful and safe arms that you could slip into whenever you needed to, the gentle hands that would run through your hair on a peaceful night, and the peculiar minds who could convince you to take a break everytime you were on the verge of bleeding through your nose.
So you obviously had to get them a present for your two-year anniversary right?
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