theycallmerome - Tumblr blog

[theycallmerome]

My baby boy is fighting FIP, and now we are dealing with cardiac problems as well. It's been a long 2 weeks so far, and lot of vet bills already stacking up. As my Vets say, he's a complicated case.

I don't normally do this, but he's my sweet boy and I want to try to giver him the best fighting chance he can have, but that unfortunately is very costly.

Currently we just had a 24 hr stay at the ER Vet this past weekend, and now we need to try to get in with a Veterinary Cardiologist. Our funds are running low.

Please help! Even if all you can do is share this.

https://gofund.me/2a0f251c

[theycallmerome]

I'm in the third trimester of wedding planning. Just don't talk to me about wedding, sleep, or really anything for that matter and you won't get your head bit off.

[theycallmerome]

ONLY 9 FRIDAY’S BEFORE I SAY I DO!!!!

NINE!

NNNNIIIIINNNNEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

[theycallmerome]

What if leaving Vet Med, the thing I've worked my life for, turned me eventually back to Vet Med? But not to Vet School. What if I learn a new career that can then later in life be used IN Vet Med? For Vet Med?

I don't know. I'm not shutting the door on Vet School or ever working in Vet Med again. But I'm also not staying in it.

[theycallmerome]

I'm looking to leave veterinary medicine. For good? I don't know. But for the time being yes. Not sure when I'll leave exactly but I know it's coming soon.

It's not just about the pay either, though that is a huge factor at play. Mostly vet med has become a soul sucking, passion killing, means to the end called vet school that has been slowly killing me without actually enabling me to achieve my goal. I've lost all of my passion for anything that I've loved in life - from my art, hiking, just being adventurous. It's brought me down into the depths of depression and anxiety. It's degraded my health. And I feel utterly stuck in life. Unable to more forward, cause for every step forward I take, there's 5 steps that push me back.

But vet med is all I know. What do I want to do? I don't want anything animal related. I want something utterly and 100% different and new. I want my weekends back, I want something that's not going to physically beat me up, I want something that I am scheduled to work until 5 and I am out by 5. I want to be able to wear actual clothes, have a wearable wardrobe for once. I'm tired of wearing scrubs.

I don't know at this point if vet school is still in my future. But what I do know right now is I need away from it. Even if for a few years. I'm burnt out.

Anyone who used to be in vet med who did a complete career change, what did you do?

Anyone in vet med currently looking at doing a career change?

[theycallmerome]

Source

[theycallmerome]

Depression and chronic stress sucks.

[theycallmerome]

Welcome back stress. You just came shoving your way back in uninvited. I would prefer you not make yourself at home but I don't have the strength to push you out right now.

[theycallmerome]

My heart hurts.

[theycallmerome]

Veterinarians and their staff have 100000000000% more compassion toward their patients than human doctors and their staff do.

There. I said it.

[theycallmerome]

“It’s all about the one face you look for in a room full of people.”

— Penqwen

[theycallmerome]

[theycallmerome]

Well pardon me for no longer believing a word you say now!

[theycallmerome]

“Stop justifying, defending, and explaining yourself. If something is correct for you, move forward with confidence.”

— Unknown

[theycallmerome]

Mental health status today: depressed and crying

[theycallmerome]

☕️ with Cocowhip + a dash of cinnamon, sun beaming through the windows, and orange slices + pine for decorating.✨✨

https://www.instagram.com/mamajbird

[theycallmerome]

Lately I have been discovering a lot about myself. First being, I probably have undiagnosed depression and possibly anxiety as well. With the amount of severe chronic stress I’ve dealt with the past 2.5 years, trauma of the loss of a loved one, depression about my self-image, this stupid pandemic, work being unrelentless to the point I’m on burn out, and add in planning a wedding. My body can’t take it anymore. I cry over everything. I stress over everything. My anxiety is high. I have lost my passion for a lot of things I used to enjoy in life. It always seems that no matter what I do I never seem to succeed and it’s effecting me in a negative way.

I think honestly a big part too, in regards to the wedding, is my Grandpa won’t be there. I always imagined he would start out walking me down the aisle, and then half way down pass me off to my dad, symbolizing the exact thing he did in my life - passing the role of Dad onto my Dad when he and my Mom got married.  Grandpa was one who I just always thought he would be there. I guess that’s what comes with being a granddaughter.

There’s a song that I have come across that I have fallen in love with called “If You Love Her” by Forest Blakk. I cry every time I listen to it because all I can think of is my Grandpa. In fact I’m crying as I listen to it now for the 6th or 7th time in a row now.

Grief sucks.

And add burn out at work and not being able to get away from it all because you literally would not be able to afford rent if I didn’t work. My roommate is also wanting to move out, leaving me to figure out where I’m going to go until G and I have a place next fall right before getting married. Add my weight being at the highest it’s ever been and not being able to lose weight no matter what I try.  And your self image being so discouraged in what it looks like now vs what it had looked like. The clothes I want to fit into. Wanting so desperately to lose weight for my wedding day so I don’t feel like a blob.

Life has been hard. I’m not giving up. But man I wish it could just put me on easy mode for a bit so I can get my bearings again. This difficulty level must be set to hard for sure.