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[thetheo-nott-blog]

YOU HAVE RECEIVED A NEW MATCH. Your match is a witch who is witty & truthful. If accepted, your first meeting will be at The Leaky Cauldron. Further meetings will be arranged at your discretion. Please swipe upwards to accept or downwards to decline. {OOC: This match is Marietta Edgecombe. Your character will not know this until they arrive at their first meeting. You have 48 hours to respond to this match. Please remember to use the event tag if you’re accepting!}

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@etta-combe

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“Oh, this certainly will be anything but normal. I figured that out, at the very least. But, if you’re willing to try, then I will too. Sometimes, trying is all we can do.” He said wistfully, giving her hand a small squeeze. 

Trying, on Theo’s part, was all he could do. It made him feel frustrated that he could give her no guarantees of happiness, or anything, really, but he would try to the best of his abilities. Was opening up going to be hard? Yes. Was trying to stop putting her on a pedestal going to be hard? Yes, even harder than the first, because, here’s the thing: As much as Theo rejected the thought, Astoria was human too. She wasn’t a goddess, but in his eyes, she wasn’t mere mortal either. She was something more. Astoria would always be something more to him, no matter what happened. He needed that sense of surrealism in his life to ensure that there was some sense of heaven in this world. 

“Let’s not talk about the future. There’s no point of taking about the future when we can barely manage the present.” He gave her a tiny smile, craning his neck on the bed so their foreheads could touch. There was a slight sense of fire when he kissed her forehead, then the nape between her chin and her neck. 

She smelled like smoke. Like fire. He probably smelled like tea, chocolate, and warm blankets. She represented everything he wasn’t. The love between the people who were opposites made for the best stories worth telling; where was the fun in relationships when both people were simply copies of each other? That was boring. Theo was sure that part of maturing was trying something new. Part of maturing was being able to love somebody. Theo had yet to do that, but if anybody could drive him to that point, it would be Astoria.

Theo knew what would be ahead, and he was scared. He was sacred of being shattered, hurt, and betrayed. The risk of ruining the friendship that had been nearly two decades in the running could be smashed at any second. If he really cared for her, would he be willing to risk it all? Would she be willing to do that too?

The answer turned out to be a very confident yes, he found out, as she kissed him. He felt an old life being sucked out of him, and a new one being put in, replenishing everything that she had taken. 

“I don’t want to turn back, even if I was given a choice.” He breathed, chest heaving. His breathing was labored and heavy. Exileration pulsed through his veins, and he thought he could run miles and miles without tiring. His arms entwined around her torso, and he couldn’t help but smile up at her. “I can’t turn back.” He whispered into the air.

While Theo may have loved to think about the future, Astoria hated it. Thinking about the future made her anxious. Marriage, kids, becoming exactly like her harpy of a mother, and having to be responsible for anyone other than herself scared her. Uncertainty and her perchance towards failure and self-destruction made her hesitant to anything that could possibly make her happy. She could see herself waking up in his bed every day and being pampered by him, but she could also see the resentment that would eventually grow from his not getting anything from her in return. She wanted only to think of the here and now because thinking about the future kept her from doing the things that felt good– the things that felt right.

Inhaling heavily as she turned, he smelled like comfort. Look at me. Astoria felt as if her whole life she had been looking everywhere else but at him. Maybe it was time that she did. Avoiding looking at him had only ever lead to unhappiness. Her wandering eye had never failed to give her a fun night, but that did not and would never equate happiness. Astoria knew it wasn’t fair to depend on him to fix her. Expecting him to fill the emptiness she felt was not only selfish, it was also unhealthy. She fixed her empty brown eyes on him. The eyes that reminded her so much of bullet holes when she saw her reflection. 

She wrapped her fingers around her wand, but did not take it. She was hesitant, something that she normally wasn’t. Astoria usually jumped head first into a decision without thinking. As long as there was a promise of even a little happiness. Theo promised her plenty of it– a lifetime’s worth of it even. Those words weren’t spoken aloud but she could feel it like a promise in the air. In Tori’s opinion, pleasure and happiness were the only good worth pursuing. He was the manifestation of both, she realised as he spoke.

Slowly, she removed her fingers from her wand and wrapped them around his own. It was her sign of surrender. She was giving him her trust and he was now responsible for anything that could come from whatever it was that they were doing. She inched up to her tippy toes and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him downwards for a kiss. It was quick, soft, and sweet. Her feet now flat on the ground, she whispered. “I need you to understand, that this isn’t a proper relationship. I can’t give you that– not yet. I don’t want to talk about the future or what this thing is that we’re doing.”

Feeling much more like herself after having let go of the things that held her back, she gave him a smile. Eyes growing brighter with ever word she whispered musically, “When I woke up I pulled you into bed with me. I didn’t do that just to share body warmth you know.” She slipped the wand from his hands and threw it towards his nightstand. With a mischievous glint in her eyes, she wrapped her arms around him once again and jumped on him, making them fall backwards into the bed. Her hair fell like a curtain around their faces as she straddled him and whispered into his lips, “No turning back now, Theodore.” She kissed him as if she was trying to take his breath and make it her own. 

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Theo’s eyes widened at Romilda’s auto-toned voice. He knew everything he was talking about, because it was part of his job. She knew her stuff, that was for sure. But, the way she said it was what surprised him. Was his team ever like that? He would have to have a talk (more like a screaming match) with the bar staff when he got back. “I’m not much of a drinker. It clouds my mind. I work better when I know what I’m doing.” He explained simply. “Have you been working here for a long time? How do you like it?” Theo tried to sound as casual as possible, but he still sounded like he was giving an interview.

“We do,” she said matter of factly, sliding one of the personalised menus toward him. In a mechanical voice, she added, “Though most of our patrons prefer ginger beer. Do you want that plain or with any magical properties? We offer memory recall, intelligence boosters, dream state…” her voice trailed off as she pointed where their offered magical additions were located on the menu.

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Theo took it, giving the other man’s hand a firm shake. “Will do. I’m assuming you’ll do the same.” He said coolly, nodding. He forced himself to check his watch. Crud. He was supposed to meet with the chefs about creating a winter menu. The seasons were always a busy time, but his breakfast with George momentarily made him forget about that. He was thankful. “I’m sorry, but I have to be off. I know you said you’ll pay, but consider this a gift for deciding to sell the business.” He took some galleons out of his pocket and put them on the table. “Perhaps I’ll see you around sometime.”

coffee | theo & george

George grinned, considering it. “Fine.” He nodded, offering his hand to the other like a deal. “You’ll have to owl me what happens.” He nodded with a grin.

He hummed. “It was a very pretty beach though.”

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“I have you too.” Theo echoed, but it was a faint whisper. Did he actually have her or was he just saying it to comfort her in the moment? Whenever it came to Astoria, he always put her needs before his. He didn’t even think about whether or not she felt the same way too. Maybe it was time for him to think about himself. As she kissed him down his chest, he grappled to contain his mind and focus. She remembered, but as much as he was thrilled, that brought countless concerns with it.

What did he want? That was the first question, and was all too easy to answer. He wanted her, but it went beyond that. He wanted to wake up every morning with her, cook breakfast in the mornings for her, and attend glittering parties and balls, and then come back in the evenings, together. It was a future, he realized, that he was thinking about. Theo loved thinking about the future, like how to expand his business, how to gain even more people’s respect, and make blow away the competition. Never in the context of ‘future’ did he ever think about the relationship part. The part where you’re supposed to fall in love and get married and then send off your kids to Hogwarts and do parenty pureblood stuff like teaching them how to act and getting multiple portraits of them to hang in the halls of the Manor… Not that he wanted that now. No, certainly not. That sounded dastardly at the moment,  but, someday he would want to be settled down. Being settled down, grounded to one person, made him feel safe.

Could Astoria commit? Was he good enough for her to commit without leaving him? Not only would it be embarrassing, but it would hurt. It was hurt more than anything else in the world, because that’s how bad he needed her in his life. He wanted to know, so badly, but he couldn’t make a conclusion. If he decided to embrace and love her fully, he would be stripped bare of his defences. He would be totally vulnerable. Would he regret it? Would he regret it if she hurt him, or the other way around? The childhood self inside told him that she never would do such a thing, but his logical, grown-up, adult, pureblood self that he shouldn’t but so trusting, and have so much hope for her… but he did. He couldn’t do anything to stop himself. Or, he wasn’t letting himself be stopped. So yes, she did admit to sleeping with him, but she didn’t lie to him. He was glad that she trusted him enough to tell the truth, and was willing to be judged for it. Possibly shunned. She put the fate of their, well, whatever it was, in his hands. And when he heard that she wanted him, she singlehandedly stopped time without trying.

Slipping out of bed, he approached her from behind. Rapidly taking her shoulders, he twisted her so he could face her in full. Using a single finger to tip her chin up, he gave himself a second to gaze at her. The shining brown hair, her bold brown eyes, it made him admire her even more. “Astoria Greengrass, look at me.” Breathing deeply, he whispered, “I want you too. I’m sorry you thought I didn’t like you for who you are. Don’t stop being who you are.” Hesitantly, he wrapped his arms around her, putting his head next to hers. The feeling was sensual. Bombs were going off in his stomach, exploding from her touch. “Oh Astoria, don’t you know that’s what drew me to you in the first place? I want you Astoria, I really do. But,” he looked down at her wand, safely in his hand, “I have your wand and you can go home. If that’s what you want.” Willingly, he pressed it into her hand, giving her the choice. If leaving made her happy, then it would make it him happy. That's all he wanted for her, in the end. He wanted her to be happy with her life, whether that had him in it or not.

“Mmmm,” Astoria mumbled in response. “I don’t need blankets I have you.” She snuggled closer to him, if that was even possible, attempted to tangle their legs together, and frowned when she was met with an obstacle– a breakfast tray. Strange. She hadn’t noticed his housekeeper come in. Although to be fair, she was cocooned in blankets and Theo’s limbs. It was near impossible for her to notice anything from above the blankets. Even if they weren’t currently covering her eyes, the sunlight coming from the windows would have been blinding. She was suddenly struck by a wave of extreme gratitude for Theo. If he hadn’t taken her home, she would be somewhere else right now trying to make a quiet getaway. Giving into temptation, she peppered kisses onto his chest– she could care less about pretending now. She wanted him. Early morning sex was her favourite cure to a hangover.

Her kisses made a path up towards his neck, she whispered, her voice hoarse from a combination of sleep and desire. “I remember.” Her words echoed throughout the room. Lightly kissing him on the lips, she took the mug from his waiting hands and manoeuvred them into a sitting position where her hair was splayed over his shoulder and her back against his chest. Morning sex could wait. The smell of caffeine was much too tempting for her in her fragile state. She sipped the coffee, testing it out before it could scald her tongue and sighed when she found it to be the perfect temperature. 

“Anything good on there?” she asked right before he dropped the mirror onto the blankets. She craned her neck towards him, wondering what it was that had surprised him enough to deliberately drop something. She had never known him to be a destructive person. Instead of getting hers, she took his. She always took things that were his as if they were her own. She froze as she read the truth. She had slept with George Weasley. She had slept with lots of people. Theo knew this and she always thought that he accepted her as she was. “What do you want to know Theo?” she asked wearily. “Do you want to know if I slept with him? I did.” With each word she spoke she became angrier, moving further and further away from him both physically and emotionally. “Did it mean anything? No. Do I want to be in a relationship? No. Will I stop being who I am for you? No.” Her face was red, this time not from embarrassment or lust but anger. In a softer tone, she looked away from him, refusing to meet his eyes and spoke. “Do I want you? Yes. Am I who you want me to be?” There was a pregnant pause before she spoke again. “I don’t know, but I am who I can be.” 

She dropped the mirror on the bed, prepared to make her exit. Astoria did not want to hear him say all of the things he would demand from her if they were to do this. She didn’t wait for him to answer her unspoken question. She didn’t want to hear it. With lightning speed she gathered her clothes from the night before and started walking towards the floo. She was in no state to apparate and even if she was she didn’t know where her wand was. She didn’t know anything at all and that scared her.

[thetheo-nott-blog]

thatonerule.com

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George grinned, “Bit of both. ” he nodded, humming to himself as he thought, “We called it a honeymoon.” He said, unable to help the sadness that slipped into his voice. He loved Angelina. Maybe one day, they could have a real honeymoon. It made him smile. He saw a future with her and that was something he didn’t see with many people – if anyone else.

George finished off his pancakes, looking at Theo. “I say, go for it. Relationships aren’t perfect, and people aren’t perfect, and I know she likes you.” He said, smiling at him.

“I’m pretty sure honeymoons don’t end up leaving the girl on the beach. My parents,” well, if they were actually in his life, which they weren’t, “would have killed me for that.” He deadpanned, completely serious. 

“I’ll make a deal with you.” Theo’s mind worked in deals and risk-reward. Logic worked best for him. “You said it yourself, relationships and people aren’t perfect. That being said, go tell Angelina that you’re not full of bullshit. Don’t be a wimp.” He was being a total hypocrite, but he would have to fix that. “I’ll tell Astoria the same, anyway,” he said, sighing. “It’s about time, anyway.” 

coffee | theo & george

[thetheo-nott-blog]

“He knew that when he kissed this girl, and forever wed his unutterable visions to her perishable breath, his mind would never romp again like the mind of God. So he waited, listening for a moment longer to the tuning-fork that had been struck upon a star. Then he kissed her."

F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby

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Every one suspects himself of at least one of the cardinal virtues, and this is mine: I am one of the few honest people I have ever known.

“The Great Gatsby” by F. Scott Fitzgerald  (via alritepetal)

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Vance Joy // Fire and the Flood

You’re the fire and the flood And I’ll always feel you in my blood Everything is fine When your hand is resting next to mine

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Theo inwardly groaned. That was a very complicated thing. But for George, having to deal with relentless siblings and even more relentless feelings? That couldn’t be too enjoyable. “Sometimes she’s happy, other times she’s sad. Sometimes she feels hopeless, or useless, or completely broken or that, she’s not good enough.” I just want to tell her that she is more than good enough. “That’s the short version. The long version is longer than this meal would take.” He sat more upright, remembering that they were simply there to talk, not so Theo could pour out his feelings. That would be really impolite on a first encounter. “I was wondering, why did you travel if you also had to take care of WWW? I hardly have time to go on vacation anymore. My last one was to Arkansas. I don’t recommend it.” He was forced to go with Astoria, but it wasn’t as bad as he made it. “It wasn’t my idea. Was Greece yours or Angelina’s?”

coffee | theo & george

“I only see Bill and Charlie when it’s Christmas time, Percy’s…Percy, and Ron isn’t very good at calmness. Oh, and Ginny will laugh.” He said, smiling as he continued to eat the food before him. George actually was enjoying Theo’s company. It was odd, because he’d never really like Slytherins before the war ended, now, he realized they were just people. Sometimes not the nicest, but still people. “Why don’t you and Astoria get a happy ending?”

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“It’s not gourmet. It’s simply gifted and talented and very experienced.” Theo defended honestly (but in good humor), thinking about his tongue, which was working to help break up the bite of waffle as they ate. He was going to use the naptkin, and then he realized it was paper, not cloth. Mm.

“As for your situation at hand, it’s not that obvious. I think it’s simply because I can relate. But, yours looks like it’s going to have a happy ending. That’s rare for girls like Astoria.” And guys like him. Pureblood marriages were almost always arranged, and he didn’t want Astoria to be unhappy if they were ever forced to elope. “Go ask a girl. They seem to be much more level headed.” For him, that girl was Millicent. As for George, he was sure he wouldn’t have a hard time finding a friend to lean on. Friendships in Theo’s world were very different that George’s. “But, why not your brothers? Or your sister?” There were so many redheads Theo was barely able to memorize George’s name alone. He would have to get better at that, eventually.

coffee | theo & george

George listened to Theo  as he spoke, nodding along, almost sadly. It was just so–true. Everything he didn’t want to admit. Theo barely knew him and could recognize it, who knew what those who were closer to him could see. He smiled anyway though, “Maybe. I think I need some females advice.” He said, nodding in though. He had quite a few female friends, mostly from his days of quidditch  and Hogwarts. But this didn’t seem like a problem to go to Ginny about. maybe Katie or Alicia? He’d probably go to Katie about this. She’d know what to do. Still, he couldn’t help but want to talk to Ron about this. But Ron, if he though so himself, was rubbish at dating advice. Or, advice in general. 

George grinned, “Sorry they can’t please your gourmet palate.” He smirked, letting out a laugh, deep, genuine, loud. It was amusing, how Theo easily picked out the flaws in the meal. Something George never would have noticed. Sure, his mum’s cooking was fantastic, but he also knew she was really the only person (besides Hogwarts house elves) who ever fixed him breakfast, so he didn’t have much palette to go on.