thestoryofanencounter-blog

[thestoryofanencounter-blog]

Chapter 6: Welcome into my home

This time I wanted our meeting to be a bit different, so I decided to invite Camille and Michel at my apartment. I thought it would be more intimate. I mean, I don’t invite just anybody into my home, it’s a personal place where I only invite people who are close to me.

 Of course I don’t live alone in my cosy apartment, there’s also my partner Manu and of course my cat Joseph (disclaimer: not a biblical reference to Jesus’ father). When we met on Friday afternoon, my partner was at work (at least somebody has to pay for this apartment…), so it left the three of us (the cat is also part of the team, he’s always the life and soul of the party).

 When Michel arrived, he came with a beautiful cheesecake! Yes, he made a cheesecake for us and I was really touched by this nice thought. The day before Michel sent us a weird text saying “Chocolat ou framboise?”. Camille and I were like “Euh, pour quoi ?” Then he explained us that he was planning on bringing a cheesecake and he didn’t know which topping to choose so he asked. Turned out that I wanted raspberry and Camille wanted chocolate so he did both. One side was covered with chocolate and the other was covered with a nice raspberry jelly.

 The cheesecake was good, really good.

 Earlier this week Michel asked us (Camille and I) if we were willing to help him with a school assignment. He had to interview a student who has a student job and transcribe the interview. I agreed to help him and that’s what we did during our last meeting. Even if the interview was only with me, we decided to invite Camille at the same hour as Michel so she could listen to our conversation and maybe catch some useful information for her blog. 

 The evening before the meeting, Michel has sent me the questions he had prepared for the interview so that I could correct them. For this assignment, Michel also had to record the interview (easier to transcribe it afterwards). How can I describe this exercise? Well, it was comical, we were laughing all the time and Michel had to put the recording on pause every time. We were like children and our lack of seriousness made Camille laugh a lot too.

 The interview lasted quite a long time but after that, we were rewarded with a bicolored cheesecake and hot coffee/tea.  During our afternoon snack, we talked about some random stuff like school and the exams. We also talked a bit about Camille’s internship. She started it later than the other students and her pupils were a bit annoying (they often are…) but she still liked it. Camille’s English is very good, she has that nice British accent and she’s so fluent. I wish my English was more like hers. I think she will be a great English teacher.

 We had to stop the meeting a bit earlier because Michel had an appointment at the dentist; he had to get his wisdom teeth pulled out…

[thestoryofanencounter-blog]

Chapter 5: another coffee at Darius

If I had to summarize our last meeting with one word, I would choose the word: fun. Even if we started the conversation with a rather serious topic such as religion, it ended with a lot of humor. Quite a contrast, don’t you think?

 This time, we were all tired and not that inspired. We went back at Darius (maybe with a coffee we would stay awake) because we hadn’t another idea but that was not a problem for me since it is one of my favorite places in our wonderful city.

 We were sitting at a small table at the front of the shop next to the counter and went I went to order, something kind of striked me; Michel’s perfume. I must say that it smells really good.

 Me: ‘Tu sens bon jusque ici Michel’ (I was standing at the counter).

The woman sitting next to our table: ‘Je confirme, ça sent très bon’

Me: ‘C’est quoi ton parfum?’

Michel : (looking on his smartphone) ‘Silver Scent de Jacques Bogart’

Me: ‘Ah madame prend note’

The woman sitting next to our table: (typing on her smartphone) ‘oui, oui, je note!’

 * All three of us laughing *

 Because we weren’t that inspired Camille thought of something our professor told us we could do with our project partners. He told us that we could ask them questions such as “What would you do if you suddenly became a millionaire?”. That’s the question we asked Michel but he was kind of surprised and didn’t really know what to answer so I helped him out. I told him “Hey, you would be a famous DJ since you like that so much”. He laughed and said “Yes, that would be something for me”. He told us that he would like to go on tours because he likes to travel. Michel told us that he was going to host a party as DJ in Paris for the festive season. I think it has something to do with his church community.

 Sometimes he goes to the church with his parents but not every Sunday because he’s not s found of the Priest. Michel explains that he does not really like the way he is telling his sermons and also he does not propose a lot of activities outside the church. Michel was used to do a lot of activities related to the church and his church community back in Aleppo. The priest here in Liège is a Syrian Priest who’s got the Belgian nationality but he does not really do it the “Syrian way” if I may say it like that (he’s not really fond of doing a lot of activities, I guess we can say that he’s a bit lazy?)

 Michel talking to us about going to church with his family made me want to share with Camille and Michel a little bit about my childhood and how I used to go to church every Sunday with my parents. I told them several things about my Christian upbringing. For example when my parents came to kiss me goodnight, they always told a little prayer with me, especially my father. He’s the one who learned me how to pray. He always told me that the most important thing was to put the others before ourselves and that we don’t pray God to ask him things. So first we prayed for the dead, then the poor and the sick all over the world, then for family and finally for ourselves.

 After my littly story, Camille also told us a bit about herself and her relation to religion. She’s atheist and told us a comical anecdote about her aunt asking her once if she was going to church and Camille looked strangely at her and said something like “Mais tantine Mireille, je ne suis pas croyante/pratiquante”.  Then Michel was curious to know how it happens that her aunt didn’t even know that Camille was a nonbeliever. He asked why this subject was taboo. Camille answered that her family and people in general simply didn’t talk about it...

 I think that here in Belgium, religion is a taboo subject because people see it as an identifying feature and people don’t like to be labelled or criticized for what they are or believe in. I think it’s the same with politics. I personally don’t like to talk about my politic opinions because I don’t want people to judge me. It’s maybe a bit silly and maybe you’re thinking that I should grow up but I guess that with time I will get used to it.

 Now let’s skip the boring part and go to the funny part. We came back on the subject of music and DJ-ing and I don’t remember how we came to imagine this but it was terribly fun. We imagined that Michel and I were going to form a music band named “L&M” (yes, like the cigarettes). He would be the DJ of course and I would be the fantastic singer (since I can sing very well). This Idea made Camille laugh so much that she thought maybe it was a good idea inspiration to make a drawing. Yes, Camille is a really talented artist (no irony here). She loves sketching and is badly good at it.

 Are you ready for THE drawing of the year?

Attention please! Here it is.

[thestoryofanencounter-blog]

Chapter 4: studies and love

On Friday 8th of November, we were meeting for the third time. We went for a coffee at Darius, just in front of the university. (Great coffee, great people.) After we ordered, we sat down and started our little meeting. Michel likes to start with some questions, or corrections he would like to bring to our texts. We try to send him our drafts before posting our articles (Camille is always a bit ahead of me on this, oops). So, Michel did his homework very well, he has printed out our articles, underlined some parts and looked up words he didn’t understand.

He came back on something Camille and I didn’t interpret really accurately. Michel told us that he was not ‘happy’ to have left Syria. Actually, he misses how Syria was before the war started, he misses his girlfriend and his work too. What he wanted to convey with the word ‘happy’, was that he was glad to live here in Belgium. According to Michel (and understandably) it is easy to live in Belgium: you are taken good care of and you are not woken up by the noise of military airplanes and bombs. He told us we had no idea how difficult it could be to live with that constant threatening noise.

Michel: “When Belgian people see the military in the streets, they are afraid”.

*

Michel told us that he does not show his emotions easily but when I heard him speak about his girlfriend, Marie Joud, I was really touched and felt some emotions going through him.

Joud (as Michel calls her) stayed in Syria because she’s still studying and because it’s too complicated for Michel to welcome her. He told us that the conditions to make her come live with him were really exorbitant (a certain salary per month, a house with a certain number of rooms, etc…). My heart kind of broke when he told us it was impossible for her to come right now and that he will have to wait.

Again… waiting.

He didn’t show us a picture of her but if it is the girl on Michel’s profile picture on Facebook, I must say that she’s really pretty. Michel and Joud know each other from when they were still kids, they’ve met at their Scouts unit. They weren’t really friends at the time but four years ago I guess something happened and (pouf) they fell in love.

  Like I said before, Joud is still studying but the problem is that she really doesn’t like her study option. You’ll ask me: “Why has she chosen something she doesn’t like? Why doesn’t she study something else?” Well, the educational system in Syria is completely different and less free than here.

In Syria, your access to the different superior studies is determined by your score at your secondary school final test (here we talk about the CESS, Certificat des Etudes Sécondaires Supérieures). I think it will be clearer with an example: Michel wanted to go for architecture. Therefore, he had to obtain at least 208/240 at his final test. Unfortunately he got 204/240 and wasn’t allowed to study architecture. Instead, he chose economics and it turned out quite well for Michel.

As for Joud, she wanted to study pharmacy but for a difference of 2 or 3 points on her final test she wasn’t allowed to. That’s why she finally opted for telecommunication engineering.

I think Belgians (and not only them but a lot of other people in the world) tend to forget how lucky they are to have the right to make their own choices.

*

Now, I would like to come back on something I briefly mentioned at the end of my previous article. The last time we spoke, Michel told us that he decided not to follow his master’s classes anymore. Mainly, this was because of his knowledge of French. He told us that he has a lot of difficulties understanding what’s said during the classes. Reading and learning new things in French turn out to be arduous. To read something we could absorb in 15 minutes, it takes him about 45 minutes.

The secondary reasons are the administration and the CPAS (Centre Public d'Action Sociale who would like him to work, not to study of course…). Michel had to wait for a very long time to get his diploma equivalency. In addition, his diploma equivalency is not that advantageous. According to the FWB (Féderation Wallonie-Bruxelles), his Syrian university degree is equal to a ‘grade académique general de Bachelier’. In other words, there is no specialization or master’s degree attached to it. Michel explains that in Flanders (the Northern part of Belgium) it would have been the case. There, their specialization is recognized as something like ‘banking’ or ‘marketing’.

Because of all these delays and complications, Michel was not able to register on time. Fortunately, thanks to the President of the Jury, Michel and his friend George were allowed to make a late registration at the university. Michel told us that he had the full support of the President of the Jury and that he/she did a lot of things for him and his friend George.

So, Michel will do his best to succeed in his master this year and if it doesn’t work, he told us that he was probably going to follow some training in logistics or something similar.

I would like to end this chapter with a funny anecdote after all this serious stuff. When we ended our conversation, Camille wanted to communicate a life changing discovery: she has found a little electronic device that eases pain during that particular period of the month. Great to me but Michel suddenly started to blush and to feel uncomfortable, so that I started to laugh and then everybody laughed!

Okay, I’m not a good story teller … I hope you that you can imagine the scene by yourself. 

[thestoryofanencounter-blog]

Chapter 3: the first conversations (second part)

The second time we met, was on a Friday afternoon. We didn’t really knew where to go so first we decided to join each other in the cafeteria (at the university) where Michel was working on the elaboration of a group presentation with a Syrian friend for his French class.

 It reminds me of something. I forgot to mention it in the first part of this chapter but Michel is following master classes at the University of Liège in the HRM department. An annoying detail, is that he’s still waiting for his diploma equivalency and God knows this bureaucratic stuff can take some time.

 When we decided to leave the cafeteria to go somewhere less noisy where we could talk, I asked Michel and Camille where they would like to go. They both answered by the typical ‘peu importe’, there’s no real translation for this in English but it could be something like ‘it does not matter to me’. I guess that the leader in me took the decision.

 Quoting myself: “Allé hop, on va au Delft!” (“Come on, let’s go to Au Delft!”).

 So, there we sat, all three of us at a nice little corner table. Camille was a bit complaining about the decoration; too old-fashioned for her but when I told her that their tea selection was fine, suddenly the coffee shop looked better. As for Michel, the coffee shop seemed ok. Michel always seems ok with everything.

 This time we went a bit more in the details with Michel. He agreed to tell us why he decided to leave his mother country (Syria) to come live here in the country of good beer and French fries (Belgian fries actually). With his explanations, we came to learn a bit more about the conflict in Syria.

 I will spare you the long history of this intricate conflict because it’s not really the point here, at least it’s not what I would like to talk about in details in this blog. The aim of the meetings with Michel is to know more about him and to create a relationship based on trust, not to become an expert on the Syrian civil war.  The conflict in Syria, how it all started and why is a subject Michel does not seem to find interesting for our blog. So, therefore, I prefer to leave it out.

 What we discussed was rather the effects of the civil war, and more particularly the economic effects. Michel explained us how life became really expensive after war. For example the electricity bill for one month passed from four euros to twenty euros.

 The living conditions also changed drastically. They were left without water and electricity for months (respectively 3 and 6). Afterwards some “smart” companies decided to put big electricity generators in the streets but of course they made people pay an exorbitant price.

 At some stage of the conversation, I asked Michel if it was rather for economic reasons that he left his country or rather because he felt insecure. He told us that where he was living, even if it was in Aleppo, he was a bit less feeling the devastating effects of war.

 So, I wasn’t aware of it but, in Aleppo, you can find Christian neighborhoods and Muslim neighborhoods living next to each other. I don’t know really why, but Michel explained us that the Christian neighborhoods were a bit less affected by war, the bombings and attacks were more concentrated on the Muslims neighborhoods (but it happened there too of course). In addition, the Christian neighborhoods are more protected and guarded by the armed forces.

PS: Afterwards Michel explained it again because apparently Camille and I didn’t understand this part quite well. Actually, where Michel was living, Christians and Muslims are living next to each other, they are not really separated in different neighborhoods. The place where Michel was living was surrounded by police stations and military headquarters, so the they were a bit more secure than elsewhere.

I was quite shocked when he told me that his girlfriends house had been attacked by some sort of missiles, which have left three nice holes in it.

*

 When I asked Michel if he was feeling homesick, if he was missing his home country, I was surprised by his answer. He just told me that he was really happy here and that he did not miss Syria that much. I told him that maybe it was because his family came with him (he came with his parents and his sister). He kind of agreed with me, I think.  

 We came to know that he and his family were already thinking about leaving Syria back in 2015 but they only took the decision in 2017. When they arrived here, they went in a Fedasil center in Eupen, which is part of la Croix Rouge. Surprisingly, he told us that it was welcoming and that the people of the center were really nice to him and his family. (I say surprisingly, because we always picture those centers as cold and unwelcoming places where people can’t go out or are kind of kept captive). We also came to know, that Michel loves to ride a bike, he particularly loved to do it in Eupen because of its beautiful nature.

 It must certainly be funnier than here. Every time a take my little foldable city bike (I’m living in an apartment at the 4th flour) I think I’m going to die crushed by a big yellow bus or by a pissed car driver.

 *

At the end of our meeting, we went on talking about another subject: school. (Yeah, we all looooove school). Camille and I told him that we had a lot of work to do for school, between the preparation of the internship of November, the master thesis and the classes, we hadn’t not so much free time left. I also talked a bit about my student job at a restaurant. I was the only one who had ever worked in the HoReCa sector. Funny, I thought everybody has done it at least once because it’s a quite common thing here for the students.

 When we talked about school, Michel told us that he had some difficulties with taking notes because it all goes so fast. Therefore he asks some notes around but it is not always that easy to get some. I think he starts to stress a bit because the exams are coming and he’s still hasn’t done anything for his classes.

 Unfortunately, some days ago, Camille and I received a message on our group conversation on Facebook. Michel had some bad news… He told us he decided not to follow his master classes anymore. He was very disappointed and didn’t know what to do next. We told him not to worry and that there is always a solution or another option.

 I hope we will get to know more about it during our next meeting and that Michel will feel better.

[thestoryofanencounter-blog]

Chapter 2: the first conversations

The second time we met was on a Friday afternoon. We didn’t really know where to go so first we decided to join each other in the cafeteria (at the university) where Michel was working on the elaboration of a group presentation with a Syrian friend for his French class.

This reminds me of something. I forgot to mention it in the first part of this chapter but Michel is following master classes at the University of Liège in the HRM department. An annoying detail, is that he’s still waiting for his diploma equivalency and God knows this bureaucratic stuff can take some time.

When we decided to leave the cafeteria to go somewhere less noisy where we could talk, I asked Michel and Camille where they would like to go. They both answered by the typical ‘peu importe’, there’s no real translation for this in English but it could be something like ‘it does not matter to me’. I guess that the leader in me took the decision.

Quoting myself: “Allé hop, on va au Delft!” (“Come on, let’s go to Au Delft!”).

So, there we sat, all three of us at a nice little corner table. Camille was a bit complaining about the decoration; too old-fashioned for her but when I told her that their tea selection was fine, suddenly the coffee shop looked better. As for Michel, the place seemed ok to him. Michel always seems ok with everything.

This time we went a bit more into details with Michel. He agreed to tell us why he decided to leave his mother country (Syria) to come and live here in the country of good beer and French fries (Belgian fries actually). With his explanations, we came to learn a bit more about the conflict in Syria.

I will spare you the long history of this intricate conflict because it’s not really the point here, at least it’s not what I would like to talk about in details in this blog. The aim of the meetings with Michel is to know more about him and to create a relationship based on trust, not to become an expert on the Syrian civil war. The conflict in Syria, how it all started and why is a subject Michel does not seem to find interesting for our blog. So, I prefer to leave it out.

What we discussed was rather the effects of the civil war, and more particularly the economic effects. Michel explained to us how life became really expensive after war. For example the electricity bill for one month passed from four euros to twenty euros.

The living conditions also changed drastically. The population was left without water and electricity for months (respectively 3 and 6). Afterwards some “smart” companies decided to put big electricity generators in the streets but of course they made people pay an exorbitant price.

At some stage of the conversation, I asked Michel if it was rather for economic reasons that he left his country or more because he felt insecure. He told us that where he was living, even if it was in Aleppo, he was not so exposed to the devastating effects of war.

So, I wasn’t aware of it but, in Aleppo, you can find Christian neighborhoods and Muslim neighborhoods living next to each other. I don’t know really why, but Michel explained to us that the Christian neighborhoods were a little less affected by war, as the bombings and attacks were more concentrated on the Muslims neighborhoods (but it happened there too of course). In addition, the Christian neighborhoods are more protected and guarded by the armed forces.

PS: Afterwards Michel explained this again because apparently Camille and I didn’t understand this part quite well. Actually, where Michel was living, Christians and Muslims are living next to each other, they are not really separated in different neighborhoods. The place where Michel was living was surrounded by police stations and military headquarters, so the they were a bit more secure than elsewhere.

I was quite shocked when he told me that his girlfriend’s house had been attacked by some sort of missiles, which have left three nice holes in it.

*

When I asked Michel if he was feeling homesick, if he was missing his home country, I was surprised by his answer. He just told me that he was really happy here and that he did not miss Syria that much. I told him that maybe it was because his family came with him (he came with his parents and his sister). He kind of agreed with me, I think.  

We came to know that he and his family were already thinking about leaving Syria back in 2015 but they only took the decision in 2017. When they arrived here, they went to a Fedasil center in Eupen, which is part of the Red Cross. Surprisingly, he told us that it was welcoming and that the people at the center were really nice to him and his family. (I say surprisingly, because we always picture those centers as cold and unwelcoming places where people can’t go out or are kind of kept captive). We also came to know that Michel loves to ride a bike, and he particularly loved to do it in Eupen because it is surrounded by beautiful countryside.

It must certainly be funnier than here. Every time a take my little foldable city bike (I’m living in an apartment on the 4th flour) I think I’m going to die crushed by a big yellow bus or by a pissed car driver.

*

Towards the end of our meeting, we proceeded to talk about another subject: school. (Yeah, we all looooove school). Camille and I told him that we had a lot of work to do for school, between the preparation of the internship of November, the master thesis and the classes, we didn’t have so much free time left. I also talked a bit about my student job at a restaurant. I was the only one who had ever worked in the HoReCa sector. Funny, I thought everybody had done it at least once because it’s a quite common thing here for the students.

When we talked about school, Michel told us that he had some difficulties taking notes because it all goes so fast. Therefore he asks for some notes from fellow students around him but it is not always that easy to get some. I think he starts to stress a bit because the exams are coming and he still hasn’t done anything for his classes.

Unfortunately, some days ago, Camille and I received a message on our group conversation on Facebook. Michel had some bad news… He told us he decided not to follow his master classes anymore. He was very disappointed and didn’t know what to do next. We told him not to worry and that there is always a solution or another option.

I hope we will get to know more about it during our next meeting and that Michel will feel better.

[thestoryofanencounter-blog]

Chapter 1: before meeting him, my expectations

At first, when I heard about the project, I was very intrigued and surprised because it’s the first time this type of experimental class is taught at the University of Liège, or at least, in my department (modern languages). Therefore, I would like to thank my professor for proposing such a project, with which I’m sure we will learn a lot about ourselves and the society we live in. I didn’t manage to get to the information session so my friends gave me some details and I was directly tempted even though it will probably take a lot of time. The chance to take part in such an interesting and innovating project happens only once and I couldn’t miss the opportunity.

The idea of a creative writing class based on encounters with a refugee person is at the same time thrilling, exciting and disturbing. On the one hand, you meet someone new, with a different background and another culture, which is quite exciting, and on the other hand, what this person may possibly share with you about his past might make you feel uncomfortable. The latter aspect of the project might be difficult to deal with, in the sense that you certainly won’t be able to understand or even imagine what this person has gone through.

Nevertheless, I have no doubts that the collaboration with my partner will be enriching on the emotional field as well as on the educational field. I really would like to get to know my project partner and hope we will be able to create a relationship based on trust. To me, the purpose of this partnership is to send a message. It’s my way of saying that I’m concerned about what happens to refugees, that I see them as individuals with a life story rather than a wandering mass or group of people. I would like to take down the prejudices or the fences I’ve built around myself by way of protection from what is actually happening in our world, from what we are accepting. I think that after this project, looking away won’t be a possibility anymore. 

Finally, I will end this first chapter by saying that this project will surely affect me in a way I’m not able to explain right now. The stories I will possibly hear about will certainly make me think about the political system and laws regarding immigration and refugees in our country. I hope and wish it changes my way of looking at certain things and pushes me to reconsider others.