therealdesastr

[therealdesastr]

it's easier to apply for jobs than ever! so what if you lost your insurance, anyone can get a job these days, even without meds. everyone is hiring! there's a "good employee" shortage!

well you just need to revamp your resume, here's a paid app subscription that can read it for you. rewrite the cover letter they won't read. google jobs in my area and then scrawl through Monster/Indeed/worbly. did you want to save the search? this was posted 98 days ago. over 1 billion applicants! this position is trending.

jobs i actively like doing and get paid for. your search returned no results. easy-apply with HireSpin! easy apply with SparkFire! easy apply with PenisFlash! with a few short clicks, get your information stolen.

watch out! the first 98 links on google are actually scams! they're false postings. oopsie. that business isn't even hiring. that other one is closed permanently. find one that looks halfway legit, google the company and the word "careers". go to their page. scroll past brightly-lit diversity stock photo JOIN US white sans serif. we are a unique, fresh, client-focused stock value capitalism. we are committed to excellence and selling your soul on ebay. we are DRIVEN with POWER to INNOVATE our greed. yippee! our company has big values of divisive decision making, sucking our dicks, and hating work-life balances. our values are to piss in your mouth. sign here and tell us if you have gender issues so we can get ahead of the sexual harassment claim. are you hispanic although let's be real we threw out the resume when we saw your last name.

sign up to LinkHub to access updates from this company. make a HirePlus account to apply. download the PoundLink app. your account has been created, click the link we sent you in 15 minutes. upload that resume. we didn't read the resume, manually fill in the lines now. what is your expected pay grade. oh actually we want hungry people, not people driven by a salary. cut a zero off that number, buddy, this is about opportunity, and we need to be thrifty. highest level of education. autofill is glitching. here is an AI generated set of questions. what is your favorite part of our sexy, sexy company. how do you resolve conflict. will you get our company logo tattooed on your person. warning: while our CEO is guilty of wage theft, we will absolutely refuse to hire a nonviolent felon.

thank you for your interest at WEEBLIX. we actually already filled this position internally. we actually never had that posting. we actually needed you to have 9 years of experience and since you have 10 years we think it might be too many? we'll be texting you. we'll email you. we'll keep your resume. definitely absolutely we won't just completely ignore you. look at your phone, there's already a spam text from Bethany@stealyouridentity. they're hiring!

wait, did you get an interview? well that's special, aren't you lucky. out of 910 jobs you applied to, one answered, finally. and funny story! actually the position isn't exactly as advertised, we are looking for someone curious and dedicated. it's sort of more managerial. no, the pay doesn't change - you won't have any leadership title. now take this 90 minute assessment. in order to be a dog groomer, we need you to explain cell biology. in order to be a copyeditor, write a tiny dissertation about the dwindling supply of helium on the planet. answer our riddles three. great job! we just need to push this up to Tracy in HR who will send it to Rodney who is actually in charge. and then of course it's jay's decision and then greg will need to see you naked and if you survive you'll be given a drug test and a full anal examination.

and of course you'll be hungry this whole time, aren't you, months and months of the same shit. months of no insurance, no meds, no funding, barely able to afford the internet and the phone and the rent - all things you need in order to even apply for our thing. but do it again! do it again and again and again, until you flip inside out and turn into a being of pure dread!

you're not hired yet because you're lazy. there's over one million AI-generated hallucinated jobs in your area. don't worry. with zipruiter, hiring and firing is easier than ever. sign up. stay on-call.

in the meantime, little peon - why don't you just fucking suffer.

[therealdesastr]

Whoever invented the '[person] is typing...' thing we all have to now see in some programs has completely worsened anxiety for many people in general.

[therealdesastr]

Depression and negative thoughts are a bottomless pit that feels impossible to claw out of.

[therealdesastr]

Sorry to be a downer, but...

Argh.

I was so excited for the wing mounts but they'd fit for my alts, and... well, FFXIV is totally not alt-friendly.

It's ironic because I'd do way, way more in the game if mounts/pets/armor glams were shared. Or at least, if there was an account-wide chest you could put items in and give to your alts, because at that point you DID do the work.

I'd totally dive into PvE and even possibly try to find a team that does it weekly. But a lot of things just don't fit for my 'main'. She has her mount she's going to use, and her glams. Some glams that come out fit for her, but most are pointless to go for - yet would fit for my alts.

The whole 'all jobs on one character' thing doesn't appeal to me at all. I have many characters with many stories.

It just bugs me is all, that the most valuable mounts to me are store mounts of all things because they're the only things account bound, like seriously.

[therealdesastr]

Can we get #altfriendlyffxiv trending? Gods it's a hope it'll be a thing someday...

The twitter link: Here!

[therealdesastr]

Plz send thoughts and prayers

[therealdesastr]

Welcome to my sense of humour

[therealdesastr]

BIRB

[therealdesastr]

*INTENSE RUSTY GATE HINGE NOISES*

[therealdesastr]

A youtube channel all about birds?

Yes.

[therealdesastr]

A monster design I came up with. Totally conceptualized by me and drawn by me (Beginner artist). Special details like bloody feathers + glasses related to an OC that may have this concept applied to them but it depends on how the story goes.

[therealdesastr]

Fabulous hat

Neeeeeew hat :D 🦇

[therealdesastr]

R̸̤͊e̷̦̠̹͍̟̬̔̓̉͆ḑ̴͓͎̬͉̈́͂̐͝ŕ̵̡̧̤͔͍͈̓͆̇͆́͝͝ů̴͍͓͕̜̏̅̓́͜͝m̴̢͚̦̱̞̓̃̈́̕

[therealdesastr]

Did I meme right?

[therealdesastr]

My new covers look gorgeous :D I plan on adding some animations for marketing to them, but I'm happy. I finally am embracing the 'vampire horror' aspect of them <3

If you want to support an indie author, please visit my website here!

[therealdesastr]

Another audiobook sample from my vampire horror, The Dancing Crow! More information on getting my book is here!

Support REAL authors and narrators (including me! I star in this book as the female main character!) and check out my series/share it around!

[therealdesastr]

A commission I got of Robert Smoke by the artist @eldrtchmn :) This is still my favorite piece of him, he looks so gorgeous. If you're curious about this OC from my book series, feel free to visit my website here and even get the book he's in :)