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Systems I'm curious...

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Good alternatives to generative AI that allow you to represent yourself without supporting corporate art theft

Picrew and other dress up games.

F2u bases.

Heroforge tabletop minifigure maker

Ponytowns avatar customization feature

Certain roblox games.

Emuferal, an emulator of the shutdown game fer.al

Or draw, your art doesn't have to be good to represent you!

Commission someone (if you have the money)

Please feel free to add to this list.

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all caps vent below the cut

I MISS ECHO. I MISS MY DEAD CAT. I MISS ALL THE FRIENDS WE'VE LOST FROM BEING A SYSTEM. I MISS A SENSE OF BELONGING I NEVER EVEN HAD IN THE FIRST PLACE. I HATE MY LIFE.

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it's echo's favorite time of year and she isn't even here enough to appreciate it. usually snow would be an immediate fronting trigger but we kinda have to accept now that she's been semi dormant since mid october and even when she IS here she's still burnt out on her interests and doesn't really get any excitement from anything

our system structure dictates that one alter has to be on Dopamine Duty at all times. echo was on dopamine duty from december 2021 to october 2024 and now it's dandy again, so even if something happens that echo previously would have been excited about, she feels guilty for not enjoying it.

im not really gonna address how i feel about it as her girlfriend, i haven't unpacked it properly and i don't really have anywhere TO unpack it, other than the internet.

the scariest part for me is that usually system changes like this tend to affect me about one year after they affect echo (ie. she went dormant in 2012 and i went dormant in 2013. she came out of dormancy in 2021 and i came out of dormancy in 2022 etc.) so does this mean i'll be gone too by next october???

we cried watching the doctor who christmas special cause joy reminded us of echo so much (no spoilers but she says some stuff that was relevant to our situation too)

iiiidunno. i really thought things could stay the same forever, with dandelion as the host and me and echo as the cohosts, we were the perfect team.

since echo has been less active, itchy has been more active, which is like, he's great, he's like my big bro in the same way dandy is echo's big bro, but the dynamic of the current team of frequent fronters is completely different.

tig is also still around as a fourth frequent fronter but we never really count them as they prefer to do their own thing, front alone, not communicate with dandy's partner or our mum or our pals etc.

- ramone

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somehow my instagram recommended posts are all from the system community over there and like, i never searched for it, don't follow anyone for that type of content, the app was just like 'you're a mentally ill fag right?? have these' and lo and behold they're ALL anti endo

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Being non-binary is like instead of having an angel and a demon on ur shoulder u have a faggot and a dyke

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Any other systems with comorbid BPD ever feel like people get confused when you talk about splitting cause it's like, which kind?? That can mean drastically different things

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grumble grumble complain complain i don't wanna be here but im the only one who can be here right now

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brute forced my way out of going back into dormancy AMA

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we should probably tell echo's friends that she's dormant but we're just really hoping we won't have to?? we haven't done it yet because every so often there's a tiny glimmer of something, like she's trying her hardest to stick around. the brain just seems to not want her to

- dandy

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i think my gf is going back into dormancy, im not feeling great

- ramone

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cw: little rant about stuff, mention of past trauma but no details

i get annoyed every time i see that post that's something along the lines of 'if you get upset about how trauma changes the brain remember that healing does too' because trauma is readily available in many many forms but healing is something that's often inaccessible, behind a paywall, involves a huge amount of vulnerability that most people can't afford in their everyday lives etc. etc. and i was just reminded of this because of something absolutely ridiculous i just realised about our brain.

i just heard my dog get up off the sofa and do a big shake in the other room like she usually does when she's going to greet my mum at the door, and i had an immediate panic response to that because my brain has come to associate the sound of my dog waking up with the sound of my mum coming through the door.

the reason this is annoying is because in the present day, there's nothing bad about my mum coming home. it doesn't indicate that something bad is about to happen. it used to mean that a long time ago and now it doesn't. i haven't had a reason to be afraid of my mum coming home for a long time now. the dog wasn't even HERE when that was an issue, so the fact that i have a new panic trigger which has nothing to do with the original context of the trauma is stupid as fuck

so yeah the body keeps the score but only about the BAD THINGS, the human brain is FUCKING SHIT at acknowledgeing when a threat is no longer present, it's shit at internalising changed behavior and growth, and im tired of people pretending that it's just as easy to rewire your brain as it was for people to traumatise you in the first place

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Some types of switching for us

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Sometimes I wonder about all the younger/newer alterhumans in the alterhuman community who are so "anti endo" and "anti pro endo" that they have effectively cut themselves off from some of the largest and/or oldest alterhuman resources out there. Like some of the biggest names that get referenced, cited, etc. include a lot of people who they do not or refuse to interact with. And not just specific individuals either. Even whole major events like Othercon, Centaurus Festival, etc. all are "endo safe" and even have/sometimes have endogenic systems (or not-strictly-traumagenic systems) as help staff.

Plus, down on through the line of things being created within the community and even outside the community.

~ Earth Listener (she/her)

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How bad do you all have it in the shared "I bought the snack and someone else swiped it when I wasn't fronting" experience of plurality? (/Silly)

Personally i think it's extremely funny when someone gets a snack and then another alter fronts by accident/because of something completely unrelated and they're just like "Oops,"

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before our syscovery we used to know a DID system who strongly believed that having sex with an alter is always sexual assault regardless of whether the alter consents, only their host was allowed to sleep with people or have relationships. idk where the hell they got that from because i know so many systems with sexual protectors or hypersexuality from trauma where it would be virtually impossible for any sexual partner to know this unless the system specifically volunteered that info.

i don’t like the idea that any hookup with a stranger could be a potential rape if they happen to have a dissociative disorder they don’t know about or don’t want to disclose, good thing i’ve never met anyone else before or since who believes this. i’m so grateful to be part of a system that collectively emphasises the importance of bodily autonomy and dignity of risk.