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[themuppetarchives]

I am so uncomfortable with this conversation.

I'm away for a few weeks and now there's sentient worms? Am I seeing this correctly? My goodness.

[themuppetarchives]

31 August, 2024

Bucephalus is dead.

[themuppetarchives]

Where's the archivist?

He has depression.

[themuppetarchives]

Not to worry, Gordon. It seems you have had quite an eventful time. Dead policemen are always troublesome to handle.

I am always available should you feel the urge to share your story with me.

The Archive is no stranger to the statements of...hmm...unconventional beings.

I'm away for a few weeks and now there's sentient worms? Am I seeing this correctly? My goodness.

[themuppetarchives]

I'm away for a few weeks and now there's sentient worms? Am I seeing this correctly? My goodness.

[themuppetarchives]

@descimatedpiggydreams

Muppet Magnus Archives, and Jon is the only human. Elias is gender swapped because only Ms. Piggy could pull off the pipe murder scene with enough cunt. Slowly throughout the show Jon becomes more and more puppety until he is finally played by Kermit, marking his transition away from humanity. Breekon and Hope are played by the two old men. Rizzo plays Tim. When Daisy transforms she turns into Animal.

[themuppetarchives]

the addition of sarasometimes to the lore is genuinely freaking me out. i was not expecting this, i thought she was an onlooker like the rest of us. i saw her interact with athena before, expressing interest in the coven. athena stated she was evaluating another person. i should've seen it coming.

Your first mistake, dear Watcher, was to think that you (or any of us, for that matter) can truly ever anticipate what will be coming next in the Croakerverse.

The signs were there, yes, but it is the very nature of this felted reality to be unpredictable and chaotic. This time it was @sarasometimes, but tomorrow it could be you.

Everything is connected here, through Felt and Fear. No one can escape it. No one can fight it.

We must simply Keep Watching.

👁️

[themuppetarchives]

2burb doe2nt end the world 4 2um rea2un cu2 there’’ve been liike two 2e22iion2 n eath2 2tiill there

It ends some version of the world, somewhere.

Regardless, anything that furthers the power of The Extinction should be handled cautiously.

Besides, I don't think I could pull off the pajamas.

[themuppetarchives]

H4v3 you 3v3r pl4y3d SBURB 4rch1v1st? Do you w4nt to?

Dear lord, I tremble at the very notion.

I have already traversed the apocalypse once, thank you, I have no desire to do so again.

Besides, I couldn't bare the guilt of once again drawing in unsuspecting innocents into such danger, let alone the people I actually care about.

No, thank you. I will continue Watching from the safety of this present, felted reality.

[themuppetarchives]

05 August, 2024

Archivist note: Fucking Mondays, indeed. I do not like how...present...the Corruption has made itself. Not that it has ever been an entity known for subtlety...still, it makes my skin itch...

[STATEMENT ENDS.]

You have been Marked by the Crawling Rot, Croaker. It comes for you, there is no running from your fate. The worms will make their hive out of your felted flesh.

-🪱

Fucking Mondays!

[themuppetarchives]

05 August, 2024

All of the plants are infested with bugs. I'M GOING TO MUPPING KILL MYSELF

[themuppetarchives]

Hello Watchers 👁️

I once again apologize for the lack of current archiving. As The Archivist, I have many responsibilities and charges, and the upkeep of this blog has fallen somewhat to the wayside.

That said, I am still active and present within the community, and have been ceaselessly watching all things in the Croakerverse.

Do feel free to ask me any questions about anything related to The Muppet Joker and I will do my best to answer you with complete citations.

Do Keep Watching 👁️

[themuppetarchives]

Incredibly thorough documentation. I highly recommend taking a look.

Week Of July 27th-August 2nd: The End Of The Roommate Saga

(The Exact Days Of This Week Strange Due To The Timing Of The Start Of This Blog.)

Hello Everyone. This Is The First Post Recounting The Events Of This Week, And Hopefully I Will Make This A Regular Occurrence, Although It Will Likely Only Follow Major Events In The Muppetverse Timeline.

To Start, I Would Like To Say that This Blog Is Not Purely An Archive Blog, And There Are Many Incredible Blogs Currently Providing Archival Content Of The Antics Within This Community.

I Simply Wish To Provide Supplemental Information, Particularly In A Sequential And Specific Manner So As To Help Them With Their Blogs, And for You To Keep Up With And Remind Yourself Of Current Events.

While I May Cover Past Chapters In This Story In The Future, Here Are Some Blogs And Resources I Recommend Highly.

@croaker-conspiracies And Their Masterpost

@themuppetarchives

@the-muppet-joker-archive (Currently Inactive)

@croaker-explained And Their Kermiad

In Addition, This Is A Living Document. I May Add Links To Particular Posts Of Importance Related To The Roommate Saga As I See Fit.

This Post Is Also An Invitation For Discussion And Addition From The Public In The Notes And Replies.

Now, Without Further Ado:

This Week Saw The Climactic End To What I Will Refer To As The “Roommate Saga”.

July 27th-28th

Tensions Were High Within The Apartment Containing Milton, Kermit, Athena, And Sage. The Hierarchy Was Precarious, With Kermit, Sage, And Milton Battling For Blanket Rights (There Were Only Two Blankets In The Apartment. Many Anons Had Been Trying To Trick Milton Into Breaking Rules, Such As Cooking Italian Food/Food Containing Garlic.

Milton’s Mental State Was Becoming Increasingly Unstable, Ascribing His Frequent Misspellings To Typing Quickly While Panicked And Being Unable To See The Keyboard Clearly While Crying. This Is Similar To Common Vent Post "Crytype" Typing Styles During Early 2010s Tumblr.

Milton Claimed That He And Sage Had Met “In A Hospital”. It Was Later Revealed By Sage That They And Milton Are Siblings, And Milton Had Lied About Being An Orphan. 

Meanwhile, Croaker’s Kermit Plush Was Missing, And He Had Just Been Tricked Into Eating Flies Baked Into Cookies By Milton Under Athena’s Orders. Increasingly Disturbed By These Events, He Ventured To The Closet To Investigate The “Meat Box” Contained Within. This Is Also Referred To As “The Rot”. The Discovery Is Shocking And Disturbing, And Later Revealed To Be An Animal Trap Containing The Maggot Infested Carcass Of A Heavily Decomposed Animal. Athena, Milton, And Sage Consumed The Flies And Maggots In A Ritual Initially Referred To As A “Roommate Bonding Activity” On The Croaker’s Blog, Claiming To Be Building Up Energy For Athena To Channel The Spirit Of Gerard Way.

After Discovering The Rot, Croaker Panicked And Began Looking For An Opportunity To Move Back In With His Mother.

It Is Revealed That Croaker’s Plush, Eyeless Since The Events Preceding The Denny’s Battle, Referred To By Milton And Athena As “The Proxy”, Had Been Kept In A Bag In The Closet And Subsequently Consumed By The Rot.

Croaker Discovers That Milton Had Stolen The Kermit Plush Under Athena’s Orders, And Discovers Its Rot-Consumed State.

Sage Confronts Milton About Lying About His Family And Past. Through Their Interactions, It Could Be Gleaned That They Had Been Raised In A Fundamentalist Christian Cult/High Control Group, Particularly The Church Of God With Signs Following. This Group, Stemming Predominantly From Appalachia, Was Known For Its Use Of Handling Venomous Snakes And Drinking Poison To Prove The Power And Saving Grace Of God. Sage Seems To Have Left The Church, While Milton Had Been Disowned For “Not Being Faithful Enough”.

It Is Revealed That The Apartment Has Been Infested With Black Mold, And Is Highly Implied To Have Carbon Monoxide Alarms Actively Going Off.

Croaker Posts In An Increasingly Panicked Fashion, Including This Post Which Strongly Resembles The Parody Lyrics Of “You Can’t Fight The Homestuck” By Kylee Henke In 2012.

Croaker Becomes Murderous, Leaving The Apartment To Craft A Wooden Stake To Kill Athena, Known Vampire.

Athena Leaves To A Graveyard To Further Prepare Herself For Her Ritual.

Sage Posts Increasing Amounts Of Dog Imagery, Referring To Itself As Athena’s Dog.

July 29th

Milton Begins Seeing Things In Their Peripheral Vision, And Becomes More Unstable Than Before.

Sage Reveals That She Left Home Because Milton Was The Favorite Child. Milton Reveals That He Was Disowned Because He Stopped Being Able To Heal, Wasn’t Able To Be Protected From The Poison, And Was Blamed For Sage’s Leaving. They Claim That This Is Due To Them Being A Sinner.

Milton Confirms That They Were Raised Pentecostal.

Anons Drive Milton Into A Religious Meltdown.

Milton Reveals That He Was Drinking Strychnine, A Highly Toxic Pesticide.

Milton Goes To Sleep. Meanwhile, Croaker Begins To Hunt Athena With A Stake, And Athena Is At The Peak Of Her Fanaticism Regarding Channeling Gerard Way By Power Of The Rot.

Athena Calls For Sage To Become Her First “Vampiric Spawn”, And For Herself And Sage To Burn The Rot Infested Kermit Plush. Croaker Is Devastated By The Loss, And “Lightly” Stabs Athena With The Previously Sharpened Wooden Stake.

Sage Tasks Themself With Caring For Athena, Now Wounded, And Takes Her To The Hospital. Croaker Frantically Collects Her Things To Move Out, Tripping Over Sleeping Milton In The Process. After A “Monologued Tragic Backstory” From Milton, Croaker Decides To Spare Him And Take Him Back To His Mother’s House, Now As Friends. 

Milton Reveals Having Spoken To A Man In A Blue Jacket While Sleeping In The Closet. After Sage Posts A Picture Of The Jacket Hanging Unworn, It Can Be Assumed That This Was A Hallucination.

Croaker’s Mother Was Initially Against Housing A Guest, But After Much “Stomping And Shrieking”, She Is Convinced.

Milton Struggles With Newfound Independence, But Is Otherwise Settling In Nicely.

Sage Is Barraged With Anons Confronting Him For His Treatment Of Milton. Sage Appears To Be Sent Into A Meltdown Because Of This.

July 30th-August 1st

The Brotherhood Appears To Be Overjoyed By The Addition Of Milton To The Movement. This Creates A Surge Of Posts, Questions, And Fanart. Unfortunately, He Also Receives A Barrage Of Haters And Trolls, Some Of Which Particularly Triggering And Concerning.

Sage And Athena Receive An Eviction Notice Due To The Unsafe State Of The Apartment And Complaints From Their Neighbor, Robert. Athena’s Connection To Gerard Appears To Be Severed.

Croaker Holds A Funeral For His Kermit Plush On July 31st, At 2:00 PM EST. The Brotherhood Offers Art, Words Of Remembrance And Sympathy, And Howls Of Grief In His Honor.

Milton Speaks Of A Surprise For Croaker, And Later Reveals That He Had Walked Several Hours Back To The Apartment To Collect Kermit’s Ashes.

There Is An Unprecedented Uptick In Croaker Discord Activity As A Whole During This Time. 

The Original Server (Made On Father’s Day Of This Year) Welcomed Milton Among Many New Brotherhood Members. The Croaker Herself Has Been Present Here For Some Time. Milton And Croaker Are Observed To Be Typing And Sending Messages Within The Same Minute, Providing Evidence That They Are Two Separate People. 

User Unmask-Strange-Aeons Created Their Own Server Inviting All To Join To Further Their Efforts In Proving That Popular Tumblr User Strange-Aeons Is In Fact The Muppet Joker. The Croaker Himself Then Joined To Confront The Allegations Directly. However, This Particular Conspiracy Seems To Stand Strong Even Still.

A New Server Dedicated To All Fans, Followers, Haters, And Lurkers Of The Muppetverse Was Created, And Milton Posted An Invite.

Unmask-Strange-Aeons Gets Kung Pow Penis’d In Response To Their Heightened Activity And Creation Of The Discord Server.

The Brotherhood Falls Into A Much More Positive Buzz Of Energy, Interacting With Renewed Fervor In The Wake Of The Roommate Saga. New Theories, Conspiracies, And Communities Emerge.

Athena And Sage Fall Much More Quiet, Their Situation Uncertain In The Wake Of Eviction.

Milton Progressively Finds A Renewed Comfort In Enjoying Musicals, Music, And Fandoms Previously Banned Within The Confines Of The Emo Religion.

Strange-Aeons Vows To Battle The Croaker In The Ballpit Of Dashcon 2.

And So The Saga Continues.

[themuppetarchives]

tv show. white man. hes sad. he has to do important thing but its hard. his girlfriend died probably. TWSIT!! theres another white man. maybe MORE. hes sad too but for different reason. its very deep probably. theyre best friends but not gay but maybe they are haha fandom!!! every girl dies or goes away. just not gay white man friend. 10 seasons 100 million viewers. what will moody white men do this week.

[themuppetarchives]

I would love to hear your thoughts on everything that happened at the apartment. Obviously the Corruption was connected (literally The Rot in the closet) but perhaps the Desolation as well? Burning the proxy was required for the ritual. At the very least I’m glad the Croaker and Milton are out and safe.

Yes, the Corruption has absolutely made its presence known - the crawling rot and its ilk have hardly ever been subtle, much to my personal discomfort and disgust.

I had not considered the burning of the effigy as a sign of the Desolation, but perhaps...I had also been considering the Hunt, due to Athena's...vampiric nature.

That said, it is now known that there are...new, stranger Entities in this world, still unknown even to The Archivist, though I will continue to investigate and discover them. I have no doubt in my mind that Athena is marked by one of these emergent powers, if she is not already a fully realized Avatar in her own right.

Now that The Croaker has been separated from her influence, I look forward to continuing to observe how the Coven develops and where their rituals lead...

[themuppetarchives]

02 August, 2024

Evening plebians, enough is enough. I have decided to reveal my true form. Face reveal under cut, if you dare

[themuppetarchives]

I struggle to make myself understood through twisted difficult words to those who do not understand Fear and thus cannot understand all that I am and all that they are

Yes...this is a struggle I often face as well. It can be...difficult, to say the least, to convey the strength and presence of Fear to those who have not been touched by it.

But I understand, anon. You can tell me and I will Understand and Know you 👁️