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𝑶𝒍𝒅𝒆𝒓 (𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝑭𝒊𝒗𝒆)

ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐡𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐞𝐫, 𝐖𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐭𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫, 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐡𝐞'𝐬 𝟑𝟒 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝟐𝟎, 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐖𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, 𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝.

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: 𝐖𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚 𝐌𝐚𝐱𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: 𝟏𝟖+ 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲, 𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐠𝐚𝐩, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐬. 𝑾𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕: 5.9𝒌

Pt. 1 | Pt. 2 | Pt. 3 | Pt. 4

𝙷𝚒, 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝙸 𝚊𝚖! 𝙸'𝚖 𝚜𝚘 𝚒𝚗𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚋𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚘𝚛𝚛𝚢 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚖𝚢 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚌𝚎, 𝙸 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚗𝚘 𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚎𝚡𝚌𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚘𝚛 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 𝚎𝚡𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚗 𝚘𝚛 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚞𝚙 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚒𝚝. 𝙸 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢, 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚞𝚐𝚐𝚕𝚎𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚎 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚘𝚗. 𝙸 𝚔𝚎𝚙𝚝 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚎𝚗, 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝙸 𝚑𝚊𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚞𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐, 𝚜𝚘 𝙸 ��𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚍 𝚞𝚙 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚍𝚎𝚕𝚎𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐. 𝙰𝚗𝚢𝚠𝚊𝚢, 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚎 𝚊𝚛𝚎, 𝙸 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚕𝚕 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚠𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚋𝚎 𝚝𝚘𝚘 𝚖𝚊𝚍 𝚊𝚝 𝚖𝚎, 𝙸'𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚛𝚢 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚘𝚗𝚎.

You stared dumbfounded in front of you, your heart beating uncontrollably in your chest; you could feel it almost rip your ribcage apart from the hard pumps. Your hands had suddenly become sweaty, the phone in your hand almost dropping to the floor. Your words had died in your throat; whatever you had wanted to tell Wanda suddenly seemed senseless, meaningless. Your eyes drifted to the door, the one she had just asked you to open, the one she was probably standing behind. You felt yourself losing every ability to think straight, the need to open the door almost blinding you, but the fear of what she wanted to talk about was making it difficult for you to even take a step towards the door. You noticed that you didn’t hear anything coming from the other end of the phone anymore, but you could feel her soft breath. You listened to it mesmerized, picturing her standing in front of you, breathing softly. The sound of her breathing slowly calmed you down; the idea of her being so close to you relaxed your heart; you could feel it slowly beating at a normal pace.

Your legs finally moved; you were gulping almost loudly as you made your way to the door, phone still in hand, not a word out of your mouth. Your hand wrapped around the doorknob, shaking as you tried your best to find the courage to turn it. Slowly you opened the door, your eyes fixated in front of you, taking in piece by piece Wanda’s figure as it opened completely. The redhead didn’t say anything; she only looked at you. Her beautiful eyes were sweet as always, her hair was tied up in a soft ponytail, and she was dressed as if she were at home, which made you realize she didn’t plan that; she just felt like it.

“Wanda… my mother’s at home.” You had no idea why those were the first words you managed to get out, but for some reason they were. Your eyes drifted away from hers; embarrassment filled you at what you were not so subtly suggesting, but as you heard a soft giggle, your gaze went back to her. She was smiling, amused at you, her cheeks slightly pinkish, a sight you decided you were quite fond of. Your own cheeks felt hot, but now that you could see her reaction to your words and probably to your thoughts, you couldn’t manage to take your eyes off of her.

“I know, detka. I would suggest making our way to my house, but I think that would probably not be wise now, would it?” Her voice was low; you could feel every part of your body shivering at the sound, your eyes burning into hers as your mind tried to drift away from the moment, to picture everything you’re both suggesting. You saw her eyes darken as you thought about making your way to her house, closing the door, and throwing every doubt and restraint out of the window. You bit your lip, drifting your eyes away from hers, trying to take a deep breath, hoping that filling your lungs with air would ease every feeling inside you. “You seriously need to stop that; you’re making me struggle to hold back.” You chuckled softly at her words, trying to keep your thoughts in check but failing miserably. You stepped forward, bringing yourself closer to her as your hand around the doorknob pulled the door, closing it completely.

“I didn’t think you would have a problem with that anymore.” As much as your mind seemed set on picturing the two of you rolling onto the sheets of her bed, your heart was still aching from what you saw at lunch. As much as it flustered you to not be able to control your thoughts, your heart was begging you to ask, to know, to move on somehow. Your eyes drifted away from hers, your fingers starting to play with one another as a part of your brain scolded you for trying to start that conversation. Your eyes found their way back to hers when you felt her index and thumb gently grabbing your chin, slowly tilting your head up to look back at her. You saw her green eyes focused on your face, her smile sweet as she tilted her head to the side, her thumb softly caressing your skin.

“It wasn’t like that earlier.” Her voice was soft and firm, and this time it was your turn to tilt your head, making her chuckle softly, her fingers quickly bringing your head straight. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as your mind drifted back to lunch, to the way Vision spoke to her and the way she reacted, the way she giggled, the way she blushed at him and his words. Your heart started to beat faster again at the memory, as if you were there once again, sitting at that table again, unable to move or do anything that could make Wanda snap out of her thoughts about him. “Focus on me, y/n.” Your eyes looked back into hers; you felt her hand slipping into yours as she sat down on the steps right outside your front door. You immediately followed her cue, sitting down next to her. She placed your joined hands into her lap; her fingers traced soft patterns on your palm, and your eyes fluttered closed at the sensation. Your thoughts about her and Vision started to dissipate as you felt her fingers softly trailing up your arm; your eyes slowly opened and looked into hers, your lips parting slightly as if to say something, but you never wanted that moment to stop, even if your mind was begging for answers, so you stayed silent. “I was chuckling at your thoughts, detka. The way you almost unconsciously make fun of anyone who might have some intimate bond with me is…oddly endearing.”

Your eyes widened at her words; you felt your cheeks becoming hot while the hand in her lap trembled slightly. You thought back once again at that moment at lunch; the timing was right; it made sense. You had immediately jumped to the conclusion she was reacting that way to Vision’s words, that she surely must have had some feelings for him still, but she was focusing on your thoughts and not his words. Your lips slowly curved into a small smile, your arm turning slightly in her lap, letting her have more room to trail her fingers along your skin.

“It wasn’t about him?” Your voice was barely a whisper, still afraid of the answer, still feeling like you could’ve never competed with him, with everything he had with her, with everything he gave her. Wanda smiled softly at you, her free hand cupping gently your cheek, her thumb stroking your skin as the hand on your arm stopped, grabbing it softly as her eyes looked into yours intensely.

“Nothing is ever about him when you're next to me.” You closed your eyes, a soft, contented sigh escaping your lips at her touch and at her words. You felt your heart swelling as you took in her words, the affection clear in her voice. You turned your head a little, pressing a soft kiss against her palm, suddenly hearing a gasp come from her, and your eyes opened once again. Her eyes were wide, looking at you with every ounce of desire and adoration you felt inside of you. Your hand rested against hers, turning it as your lips followed it, pressing more soft kisses against her skin. Your eyes never left hers as you watched her close them, your lips covering her palm with tender kisses, slowly trailing to her wrist as your hand moved gently against the outside of her arm, caressing the skin until your fingers reached her elbow.

“Milaya…” Her voice was so soft and quiet you almost didn't hear it, your eyes looking at her face, the struggle evident in her features. Your lips left her arm while your hand moved slowly until it reached her neck; you scooted closer to her, your knees brushing against her legs as you turned your body to face her. Your fingers running through the little hairs falling down from the ponytail, your eyes focused on her as she opened hers, her gaze drifting from your own eyes to your lips, which you subconsciously licked with anticipation. “Don't do that… you know we can't.” She forced her words out of her mouth, your fingers caressing gently the back of her neck, slowly pulling her closer to you while your own eyes focused on her slightly parted lips.

“But we want to.” You stated firmly, your lips barely inches away from hers, your eyes drifting to her own, waiting for any signal from her. Wanda slowly nodded, the movement so slow you wouldn't have recognized it as a nod had you not been watching her reaction closely. A small smile formed on your lips; you could see the struggle in her features, trying her best to pull away, to tell you that you shouldn’t, but the desire she felt was overcoming every ounce of self-control and responsibility she had.

You licked your lips again, your tongue brushing against her own lips, a small gasp escaping her mouth. The sound leaving her lips made your body shiver, but before you could finally close the final gap between the two of you, you felt her soft, sweet lips on yours.

Your eyes remained open for a few seconds, widening in shock before realizing that Wanda was actually kissing you. Her soft lips were pressed firmly against yours, her hand moving to rest on your hip, and you felt yourself being pulled closer to her. You felt the soft touch of her other hand on your cheek; the hand you had on the back of her head was now grabbing it with a firm hold. A soft sigh escaped your lips when you felt her hand resting on your cheek, comforting and grounding you. You finally melted into the kiss, the shock of the action leaving your body as you started moving your lips against hers. Her movements felt gentle, sweet, and tender, the hand on your cheek softly caressing your skin as you pulled her even closer, a soft gasp leaving her lips as she felt herself being scooted closer to you. You closed your eyes, losing yourself completely in the kiss. Her soft lips were moving against yours; little waves of desire and joy washed over your body over and over again. You felt as if you could start jumping up and down from happiness; hadn’t you been in such an intimate and waited-for moment. Your fingers softly caressed the back of her neck before taking her hair tie between them and pulling it off, letting her hair fall onto her shoulders. You felt a gasp coming from her lips onto yours as you ran your fingers through her locks, your nails scratching softly her scalp. Her hand on your hip closed tightly around your shirt, tugging on it to pull you even closer as you felt her tongue trace gently your bottom lip. You gasped at the feeling, and it was all it took for her to easily slip her tongue in your mouth; you couldn’t help the soft moan that escaped you when you felt her tongue tangle with yours. You moved your hand from the ground on her back, pulling her upper body completely against yours as you felt yourself melting more and more against her lips until even breathing was starting to become an issue. Your fingers trailed on her back, caressing her skin through her shirt until they started toying with the hem of her shirt, your fingertips grazing the warm skin underneath. Her thumb started stroking your cheek lightly when you felt her lips breaking away gradually from yours. You slowly opened your eyes in confusion; your expression softened as soon as you were met by her warm and loving gaze. Wanda softly pressed her forehead against yours; your lips were still only a few inches away as you both panted against each other.

“You’re a dangerous little thing.” You chuckled softly when Wanda’s voice met your ears; your eyes sparkled with love and desire as you looked into her green ones. The sweet smile on her face was melting your heart; you watched as she bit her lip when your hand resumed its journey underneath her shirt, tracing soft patterns on her lower back. Wanda’s eyes closed again as you trailed your fingertips on her soft skin, smiling tenderly at her reaction. “The way you make me lose control…”

“I never wanted you to have any in the first place.” Wanda’s eyes shot open at your confession, the shocked look quickly replaced by a knowing smirk as she chuckled. She slowly moved her head away from yours, her hands still on your body as she kept her eyes focused on you. You gently moved your hand from the back of her neck, trailing it softly along her arm to rest it on her thigh.

“I figured as much, detka. But what I said before still stands; we can’t do this. We’ve already pushed things too far. Not that I’m complaining, let that be clear.” Wanda’s voice was soft and tender, but her words stung you deeply either way. The thought of never feeling her lips against yours again, never being able to taste her again, was like torture to you. You couldn’t bear the idea of not being able to hold her close, of letting her go once and for all. Wanda’s eyes softened; you knew she could hear everything that was going through your head, but you couldn’t help the way you were feeling towards those restrictions. “I don’t like this either, y/n. You have to understand that I want nothing more than to be able to explore this with you, but Natasha would kill me.”

“She can’t expect me to be single forever.” You stated pouting, at which Wanda chuckled again. You furrowed your eyebrows at her reaction, only making her chuckle even more.

“She doesn't expect that, baby. But maybe she doesn't expect you to bang her 34-year-old friend, either.” You blushed heavily at her words, at which Wanda responded by gripping firmly your hips with both hands, pulling you closer to her. You smiled through your blush as you scooted closer, propping yourself up on your hands as you gently sat on her lap, your legs resting on each side of her thighs. You immediately felt her arms circling your body, her hands resting firmly pressed against your back. Your hand cupped her cheek as you placed the other on her shoulder, your eyes losing themselves in hers.

“You know that's not the only thing I want.” You whispered, leaning in, your lips hovering over hers once again, making you both shiver at the sensation. You saw Wanda nodding slowly before taking your lips in hers again. Your arms slid around her neck as you relaxed your body completely against hers.

“Oh, I know. But I'm also aware of the fact that it's the one thing always in the front of your mind.” Wanda murmured against your lips, breaking away briefly to make you blush all over again. She then captured your lips with hers, pulling you impossibly closer against her body. Your tongue immediately traced her bottom lip, mimicking her own gesture from before. You felt her smiling against your lips before parting them enough for you to slip your tongue inside.

You tried once again to slide your hands underneath her shirt, but you suddenly felt them being pushed behind your back, unable to move them. You felt Wanda's hands caressing your sides, and you wondered for a moment how she was able to hold your hands behind you without using her own before you realized she was using her magic.

A low moan escaped your lips at the thought of Wanda using her magic on you. At the sound of your moan, you felt her take your bottom lip between her teeth, making you gasp at the feeling. Wanda then broke away from your lips slowly, her eyes meeting your still shocked ones.

“I could have so much fun with you. With your desires, the way you respond to me, to my touch.” You shiver at her words and her low and sultry tone, your hands still fighting against her magic to be freed and be able to touch her somehow.

“I knew I'd need to tie up those wandering hands, sooner or later.” You bit your bottom lip at her playful words, your eyes shining with mischief and desire as she finally freed your hands. Your eyes scanned them briefly before placing them on her back, your nails grazing her skin through her shirt, making her shiver slightly.

“Of course you'd like that. Here I was thinking I could make you stop with that simple threat.” Wanda's eyes were playful, and you found yourself loving everything about her even more. The idea of sharing with her such a beautiful and sweet moment and being able to tease each other like that was making up for every day spent dreaming about such a moment.

You felt her hands gently take hold of your wrists, moving them away from her back, making you pout and look at her with pleading eyes. Wanda shook her head slowly, giving you an apologetic smile.

“You know I need to go, sweetie. I was kissing you goodbye.” You felt your eyes widen at her words, your hands fighting against her strong grip as your eyes started welling up. You noticed her own expression soften, her hands releasing yours before circling your body with her arms, pulling you close against her. Your head rested on her shoulder, her fingers caressing your hair softly, her lips pressing soft kisses on the top of your head. “I’m sorry, solnishko. I’ve probably made things worse by kissing you.”

You shook your head slowly against her shoulder, your fingers gripping tightly her shirt, holding onto her as you pressed your head even more against her skin. You slowly relaxed your body in her embrace, feeling her soft kisses and her caresses, your eyes closing as you tried to savor every little moment and touch. Even though your body was relaxing, your mind wandered and your heart ached. It was never easy for you to wrap your head around the idea of giving up on Wanda, giving up on the amazing things she could make you feel just with her presence, just by looking at you.

Even when you had no idea about her feelings for you, even when you thought everything was one-sided, you still enjoyed every little thing you felt towards her. The way she could easily make you blush, the way her every touch made your skin feel on fire, the way she made your insides twist whenever she addressed you in that sweet voice. You always had a soft spot for her; you had always longed for every little moment. You had never once wanted your feelings to just disappear, even when everything was only in your mind, even when loving her was also hurting you.

You had finally been able to taste what something between you two could be, and now the idea of giving that up was even more hurtful. You knew how her lips tasted; you knew how having her tongue in your mouth made you feel. You knew how she sounded when she gasped, when she moaned for you. You knew how her touch on your skin sent shivers through your spine, you knew how soft and warm her own felt like under your fingertips, and you couldn't even bear the thought of never feeling those things again.

Her hands pushed you back a little, her fingers gently grasping your chin, tilting your head up to make you look at her. Your eyes got immediately lost in her green ones, the hurt and regret clear in them; you wondered for a moment if she was regretting kissing you, if she really believed she had only made things worse. Her soft smile as she looked at you cleared your doubts, every question dissipating from your mind at the feeling of her hand softly cupping your cheek, her thumb stroking against your skin.

“I’ll think about this moment for a very long time as well, baby.” Her voice was soft, her hand slowly leaving your cheek to take your hands in hers, standing up reluctantly. You followed her standing up as well, your eyes never leaving hers as you waited for her goodbye. “We’ll still see each other if you feel like it. I’ll still be in your life if you want me to. Just not the way we both want.” She cupped your cheek again, her touch soft, almost feather-like against your skin. You leaned into her hand, your smile showing a mix between the adoration you were feeling for her and the sadness enveloping your heart as you slowly took in everything you were giving up on.

The next few weeks you found yourself lying in bed throughout most of the time; your mother kept coming to check up on you; her expressions were always full of wonder and concern. You managed to avoid every question she threw at you, and, for some reason, she seemed not to dwell on the lack of response from you. You could sense she wanted to ask more, that she wanted to dig more; you could see it in her eyes, in the way she looked at you before leaving your room, as if she was hoping for you to say something, anything to ease her mind, to let her help you somehow.

Part of you wanted to talk to her, wanted to explain to her what you were constantly thinking about. Part of you wanted her to comfort you, to tell you all about her first love as well, how it was, who they were, what happened, and how eventually she moved on and how you could do the same one day.

However, there was another part of you that just wanted to yell at her, that was so extremely pissed at her. This part of you blamed her for not being able to explore this thing with Wanda, for not being able to turn it into a relationship. You knew it wasn’t fair; you knew there were reasons, reasons that somewhat made sense, for your mother to not approve of your possible relationship. You knew that Wanda was right, that it was too risky, but you just couldn’t shake off the fact that it was everything you had ever wanted.

Your mind was a complete mess; all you could think about were those moments you had spent with Wanda on the front steps of your house; all your heart could feel was the heartbreak from not being able to replicate those moments again. Sometimes, when you were so completely lost in your mind, in your thoughts, in your memories of that moment, in your memories of her, you could swear you were still able to taste her lips on yours, to feel her tongue against yours. And, in those moments, you just wanted to scream at whoever was making it impossible for you to feel all that again.

You hadn’t texted her even once; she had told you she still would have been in your life if you wanted that, and you did, but you had no idea what to tell her. When it came down to actually talking to her, words seemed to be lost on you; you were afraid you were just going to push her again to do something she had told you that you couldn't do, so you just stayed silent. Time and time again you had found yourself with your phone in your hands, fidgeting with it, your fingers hovering over the screen, over the keyboard, aching to press on those letters, as you tried to come up with something to say, something to text her with, but nothing that didn’t seem too pushy or too cheesy came to mind.

Not hearing from her only deepened your heartbreak; the only thing you somehow managed to do was study. A part deep inside you linked that act to her. The knowledge she was the one to always spur you on in your studies, to teach you, and always, always praise you, made you almost eager to keep studying. Spending time on your books seemed to almost soothe the heartache you were feeling; however, sometimes you could feel a slight headache coming. Your mind was conflicted between focusing completely on the words written or on the link between your studies and Wanda.

Your mother had managed to make you smile only once during those weeks, even laugh a bit at the way she always knew how to be there for you even when she didn’t know exactly what was happening to you, what was going on in your mind. You had reluctantly left your room after she had called you a few times too many because she insisted you needed to leave your room at some point during the day, saying she had made you something special as a quick snack.

You had dragged your feet all the way from your room to the kitchen, where your mother was waiting for you with a huge grin on her face. Probably proud of herself for getting me out of my room, you thought to yourself as you took your seat at the kitchen table. Your eyes were carefully avoiding hers, as if the moment you two had made eye contact, she would have either found out about everything by the look in your eyes or you would have fallen apart and ranted about everything.

You eyed almost curiously the plate before you; a soft chuckle fell from your lips as you took in the most shapeless cinnamon rolls you had probably ever seen. Your eyes finally drifted to your mother’s, a soft grin on your lips, mimicking hers.

“Cinnamon rolls? As a snack?” Your grin almost widened at your own words and the roll of her eyes. She pushed herself off the kitchen counter and crossed the room to get closer to you, standing at the other end of the table and leaning against it as she shook her head at your words.

“I thought you could use some comfort food, you ungrateful daughter of mine.” She replied with a soft laugh; there was no real venom in her words, and you couldn’t help but feel a light sense of comfort and peace at the way she was still trying to pamper you even when she couldn’t understand you or what was going on in your mind.

“I’m not really in the mood for food right now, but -” You were interrupted by her as she raised her hand, signaling for you to stop talking. You narrowed your eyes at her gesture, pursing your lips as you looked at her slightly pissed off.

“At least take it to your room if you really feel the need to stay in there.” You hummed at her words, your demeanor softening as you listened to her, slowly nodding in acceptance and taking the plate in your hand, your eyes still locked on hers. You saw a small smirk form on her lips as you lifted the plate, and a sudden confused expression appeared on your face, which quickly changed as soon as your eyes landed back on the table. Your eyes widened, and a soft gasp escaped your lips while you felt your cheeks starting to burn.

Condoms.

Your mother had left just under the plate some condoms.

Your eyes quickly drifted back to hers, the shock and embarrassment clear on your face. You could see she was fighting back a laugh, and you narrowed your eyes once again, fighting the urge to roll them at her.

“Lisichka, I know perfectly well what the behavior you’ve been showing lately means; you’re in love. And I just want to make sure I don’t have to raise grandkids while I’m still fighting with my team.” Her tone was almost playful; you could hear it, but that still didn’t make your cheeks flush any less, the plate in your hand trembling as you tried to come up with something to say to her. Usually you weren’t one to hold back when talking or bantering with her, but that was a situation you had never thought you would have found yourself in; she had caught you completely off guard with that gesture, and you found yourself stuttering.

“Mom, umh, l-listen, I know we have never talked about t-this, but I, I don’t… umh…” You couldn’t find the words, you had never talked about boys or girls, you had never felt the need to. She had always just let you live your life when possible, never questioning or demanding explanations, so you did just that: lived your life without explaining every little thing or feeling you were having. And now this. “I’m not… not into b-boys…”

Suddenly there was a loud laugh coming from her, and your eyes widened even more, looking at her curiously, trying to understand, to notice something, a reason, an explanation, as she kept laughing while looking at you with the most amused expression you had ever seen.

“Oh, God. You should’ve seen your face and—and your voice! Oh, God, adorable.” She kept on laughing, and your embarrassment slowly started to fade, making room for frustration and irritation at her reaction. She clearly spotted the changes in your mood because she slowly stopped laughing; her eyes were still showing her amusement as she stepped closer to you, resting her hand on your arm and rubbing it softly. “I know, y/n. I’ve known for quite some time; I was just waiting for you to tell me, and I didn’t want to just blatantly make assumptions. You know I always know everything.”

That was the first afternoon you had spent in the living room with her after what had happened with Wanda; you had talked, laughed, and watched TV shows. Your heart suddenly felt lighter for the first time in weeks, maybe months. But in the back of your mind, her words kept ringing like an alarm, going off again and again.

I always know everything.

Everything suddenly changed when your mother had to go away for a few days because something bad had happened somewhere. Even though you were now aware of her job, neither she nor the other Avengers, it still felt weird to call them that, seemed to be willing to include you in their plans or missions.

You had tried to bug your mother with questions on what had happened, on how long she was going away for, where she was going to be staying, and how dangerous it could be. You had wanted to beg her not to go, to leave it all to the others, to just stay home with you, not bearing the thought of her getting hurt or, worse, not coming home. A strength inside you that you had no idea existed kept you from begging her to stay, knowing how much she loved her job, how much helping people and fixing things for them had always helped her as well with herself and her image of herself.

About a month after your first kiss with Wanda, your mother and everyone else left for what turned out to be five long, excruciating days. You had spent those days glued to the news or to your phone, trying to get as much information as you could about what was happening. Every room you were in was constantly filled with frustrated groans and curse words when all you could find online were praises about them and their work, their abilities, and their powers.

Of course you were delighted to know everyone seemed to appreciate the danger they always put themselves in, but you wanted, you needed to know how everything was actually going, if they were all okay, if someone was hurt. You desperately needed to know if your mother and Wanda were okay, if they had managed to stay safe somehow.

It was early in the morning when you heard the lock on the door click open. You obviously were still awake, sleep had not come easily on you during those days, so you rushed to it, flying into your mother’s arms as soon as the door opened completely. You felt her arms wrap around you, and you sighed in relief, burying your head into her shoulder as you tightened your grip on her.

“You could at least let me in my own house, lisichka.” You heard your mother say almost playfully, and your heart fluttered at her voice; your arms slowly loosened their grip on her as you stepped back, your eyes scanning her figure, your expression one of surprise as you took in her almost unscathed form. Your eyes drifted back to her face as you heard a soft chuckle. “You should stop underestimating us, you know? Besides, Wanda seemed to have hidden from us her ability with the protection spell; it was like nothing she had ever shown us before.”

Your eyes widened at her words, a small smile forming on your lips at the thought of how great Wanda’s magic could be. You stepped aside from the door, allowing your mother to enter the house before closing the door and following her to the living room after she had discarded everything she had on her. You sat on the couch next to her, crossing your legs as you looked at her, your eyes still scanning her figure, trying to understand if she really was as uninjured as she seemed.

“I’m okay, really. It was tiring, but otherwise, I’m completely fine; I just need to rest for a while.” At her words, you nodded your head, smiling while grabbing a blanket, slowly standing up from the couch to allow her to lie down. You watched her closely as she laid down, gently covering her with the blanket as she did; her eyes were still on you, and you could clearly see the hint of amusement in them. “I promise I’m okay. I’ve been doing this for years now; I know how my body feels and what I need. You’ve probably been inside all the time while I was away; go take a walk or something, or else I know you’re gonna watch me sleep.”

Your mother chuckled as you rolled your eyes at her words, but you couldn't bring yourself to deny what she was saying. The truth was, you weren’t used as she was with the whole fighting thing, and you couldn’t help but be worried and feel the need to make sure she was okay. The idea of going out, now that you were sure she was gonna be resting safely in your home, wasn’t something you disliked. You nodded at her, smiling softly as you placed a gentle kiss on her cheek before heading towards your room, fishing out your phone immediately as you entered your room. You decided to send Wanda a text now that you had something to talk about besides your feelings for her.

Mom just got home, she explained a bit about what happened. How are you? Please, let me know.

You bit your lip as you stared at the bubble your text formed on the screen, your fingers still itching to write more, until you muttered something under your breath and let go of your restraint.

I could come over.

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