thejuaninamillionshow

[thejuaninamillionshow]

RE: LULULEMON

RE: LULULEMON

To my sweet friends but especially those working in and auditioning for the musical theatre: STOP wearing lululemon head-to-toe.

You look impossibly crazy. PLEASE DO PAY YOUR SALLY MAE LOANS instead.

I like lululemon... the problem isn't lululemon...it's the insistence on wearing it from head-to-toe.

Men: the pants do not look like street pants/ they do not look "period," the same way the do not make your taps sound any better, or hide your bent legs past 90 degrees. They DO make you look like an old man from Vermont that has birdwatched recreationally with Bernie Sanders for over 37 years.

Women: do not think that a capri length workout pant is beneficial for your life story. It is not. Please do not wear those hideous skirts that make you look like you are wearing a lampshade. Can you imagine? And please never stick your thumbs in those ridiculoius thumb holes in order to cover half of your hand. CAN YOU IMAGINE? Four women dancing together in front of a Broadway choreographer wearing pleated lamp shade horror skirts with LUON zip-up hoodies with YOUR GODFORSAKEN THUMBS HANGING OUT OF SOME RIDICULOUS SIDE SLEEVE HOLE. Just because you had a sweater in high school that had these ridiculous holes that you wore while sitting defiantly in Saturday morning detention because you were late to home room too many with your arms crossed with Mr. Woodbury from the English department and "they're so comfortable" does not mean you should wear them as an adult woman attempting to work in the musical THEATRE.

I can GUARANTEE YOU WOMEN THAT ARE ON BROADWAY did not wear these lamp shade skirts in their respective Broadway auditions.

Wear the leggings sure...incorporate their beautifully made pieces. Unless lululemon ispaying your bills there is JUST NO NEED.

[thejuaninamillionshow]

Correct.

Getting together with your bestie for drinks after way too long.

Source: I Fucking Love This

[thejuaninamillionshow]

With my beautiful friend @pixieaventura last night at QUEEN at Industry. I am lucky to have this true angel in my life. Not only a beauitul friend but one of the greatest performers I have been blessed to watch live. Miss Pixie turns it every time. #miamiinNYC #GalPalsDeluxeSupreme (at Industry Bar)

[thejuaninamillionshow]

THIS AMERICAN LIFE. I was made for loving him. #OODLESofPOODLES #JuansParty #BestInEVERYTHING #DogBitchStar #HypoallergenicPartyBottom

[thejuaninamillionshow]

The view from the Falcon Family Compound. #VivaMiami #IcantSeeRussiaButiCanSeeCuba

[thejuaninamillionshow]

😵😮😂😂 WHO IS WATCHING ATLANTA TONIGHT?!? APOLLO's LET-HAVE: Part 2. Id let Apollo strangle me anytime he wanted. #HideYoKidsHidYoKenya #RHOA #RealhousewivesOfAtlanta #neneleakes #kandikoatednightmaresfantasmic (at LaGuardia Airport (LGA))

[thejuaninamillionshow]

With @oscargmolina !! " He supports me and he loves me understands me IS ONE OF ME. #Evita #TwoBrownboysinParadise #HispanicsFromMiamiForABetterNYC #Viva #designingWomen #hurricaneAndrewBabies

[thejuaninamillionshow]

We were definitely starring in our own Half-Time SPECTACULAR. My vision @juishe giving croptop dreams and my sis @corydstewart serving pouty bicep unattainability glory. 🍒👸🔥🏈🏆 #LivinlaVIVAloca #WhiteHouseBlackMarket #justUsGals #nyc #CleopatraCominAtYa

[thejuaninamillionshow]

Celebrating my Grandfather's birthday today! Abuelito Andres. He would have been 84 today. Missing him very much. They just don't make em' like that anymore. Miss him more everyday.

[thejuaninamillionshow]

#BreakthroughActingMomentOfTheDay #SallyFields #THEWHOLETIME #mrsDoubtfire #threeSeparateActions #Oneline

[thejuaninamillionshow]

It's a new year...and if the old you is begging for a new outlook....a new body..and a new bold fresh leader to take you into the glittery unknown of 2014 I would follow my beloved sister and one of my best friends @coryDStewart .....#toAGleamingHopeful2014

[thejuaninamillionshow]

Thank goodness he went to Tiffany's because if he had gone to Jarred's I would have kicked his ass out. #happybirthday #Byeeee #nene #tellmeMore #MiamiBitch #breakfastAtTiffanysButDinnerAyRubyTueasdays

[thejuaninamillionshow]

I may be a 27 year old man now...but I'll always be her baby. I'm very blessed to be spending my birthday in Miami with my mother and my family. 💖✨💖✨👏🙏😍🍒🎉💡🎉

[thejuaninamillionshow]

Taylor may have been in her luggage...BUT AVIVA'S LEG IS ON THE FLOOR. #TheWomanIsDeranged #ButIamINSPIRED THIS is life. #rhonyc #AvivaForPrez #Aviva #AvivaBothForwardsAndBackwardsYOUGETFULLAVIVA

[thejuaninamillionshow]

ME EVERY DAY AT THE BEAUTY PARLOR. #Nene #Juani #rhoa #MakeMebeautiful

[thejuaninamillionshow]

#TurningIT with @nickrod1017 #DancinglikeNoOneIsWatching #butEVERYONEactuallyis #HispanicHeritageYear #CubainMiami (at Dewar's Suite Level @ AA ARENA)

[thejuaninamillionshow]

Ringing in the new year with my beloved family. I am so madly IN LOVE with these people. A lot of my family is missing but I feel the love and I'm sending my heart. @marlenago @misserikaann @nickrod1017 #pitbull #miami #mr305 #cuba #cubansforralphlauren #2014 #feelingit