the-rings-system

[the-rings-system]

Hi, so- we have a new alter, a fictive named ozpin, that appeared a little over a week ago and hes always kind of around? Kinda being co con but still hanging out in the back and chilling. As far as I'm aware, he hasnt left the fronting room in the headspace yet. This hasnt happened with new alters before, so I dont rlly know if this is an exception or if ozpin has a role that means hes often around front. I'm not looking for definitive answers btw, just a bit of help. -Felix/David (host)

Also about my last ask, ozpin has already fronted, which is new for us. Usually any of us takes ages to front, let alone new alters within a week of existing. Still wondering if this is normal 🤔 -Felix/David (host)

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I think it’s good to keep in mind that there’s no such thing as “normal” when it comes to systems! For example, in our system, new alters often front very quickly, and don’t have that delay. It doesn’t mean one of our systems is normal and one isn’t - it’s just a difference.

So instead of framing this experience as “normal” or not - especially compared to other systems - it’s more helpful to compare it to your own experiences. Is this something new, or something you’ve experienced before? If it’s something new, it’s worth journaling about, and investigating a little bit. And even then, there doesn’t have to be a reason he’s experiencing things differently than other folks in your system! :)

[the-rings-system]

Hi! I believe at some point in a video Silver had mentioned that the inner world in the system had to be built up? (I think i have the right person- feel free to ignore if I'm incorrect) We're having some trouble making sure everybody has their own space and feels like they belong and I was wondering if you had any tips on how to build an inner world(like organizing the space + the act of actually building)?

Yes, we have a script written and can messsge it to you. Send us a message :)

[the-rings-system]

how do you get over the (social) anxiety of talking to your alters? i straight up can't walk up to people and talk to them, (alters included), unless theyre a retail worker and i know exactly what to say. i can't strike up a conversation with my alters because i really just don't fuckin know how to and its so frustrating bc ive had 3 years to figure this out and ive spent it being an awful host ignoring my problems and stuff. how do i get better at approaching my alters?

I wish I knew! We are not over that, and are still working out solutions. If we figure anything out, we’ll circle back around! In the meantime, does anyone have any tips to put in the comments?

[the-rings-system]

If the host(s) don't believe they experience blackout amnesia but other parts do (say, an alter that rarely fronts has no idea what is going on, ever), does the system qualify as experiencing complete amnesia or does the host have to be the one that loses time?

It’s any complete amnesia between any system members, I believe. However, realistically it comes down to the clinician diagnosing you :)

[the-rings-system]

do you sometimes feel like the lines between OSDD-1 a/b and DID are arbitrary? we outwardly present much more like OSDD-1a even though we're diagnosed with DID (significantly different alters and evidence of amnesia). we don't fully switch, and it feels :/ sometimes when ppl say that only happens with OSDD, as if it's a "lesser" form of DID where the symptoms aren't as strong. idk we've just never presented how other people have and it can be isolating

Yes, absolutely. Both amnesia, and “distinctness of alters” are a spectrum, and it’s incredibly difficult to determine a hard line on what’s constitutes OSDD vs DID.

(Also, worth a mention that there’s OSDD-1 presentations outside of a/b as well!)

If you want to read Paul Dell (creator of the MID) grumble about this exact same thing, read the “partial DID” chapter of “dissociative disorders in the DSM-5 and beyond.” Not only is it a great read, it’s awesome to see these exact frustrations voiced but such an influential professional in the field.

[the-rings-system]

My (now former) trauma therapist insisted that the only legitimate treatment for DID is EMDR, and requires going into the traumatic memory fully, even if it results in dissociating or switching. Is that what you’ve read or experienced? Thanks!

Nope! There’s a bunch of ways to process trauma, and EMDR is only one of them. We’re doing two other methods rn, both of which aren’t EDMR. Plus, you have to do EDMR with dissociative disorders in a certain way, with special training, because one’s reactions to EMDR if you dissociate are much different, and without proper training the therapist can accidentally re-traumatize the client when they don’t know how to identify negative reactions. So glad you stepped away from that! Hope you find a better therapist in the future 💕

[the-rings-system]

Host has several chronic pain conditions, but the other alters report not really feeling any the symptoms. Is this like... normal? Defend self from chronic pain by having several alters who disconnect from pain signals?

Normal is a tricky word, but you’re not alone in that! System members can experience symptoms of systemwide disabilities differently, some experienceing little to no symptoms :)

[the-rings-system]

Any tips for starting a system blog? Like... half of the system prefers planning for things so we'd like advice if that's okay

Honestly, we wouldn’t know! As it should be obvious, this quickly devolved into just answering asks. You’d be better off asking someone who has a running and cohesive blog 💕

[the-rings-system]

We're still not great at figuring out what's happening with the system, if I'm just making it up, who's who, who's fronting, etc. Everything's pretty cloudy and smeared together. Though that's a big issue in itself, my specific question rn is - in such a case, how does one tell the difference between a little, a typically older alter/the host regressing, an alter actually being an age-slider, or all of the above?

Honestly, we don’t know. Normally, we just shrug and say “we’re small,” and then proceed as such. Take it one step at a time, and focus on what you need in the moment 💕

[the-rings-system]

tw: mentions of a panic attack? i heard some screaming from inside my head and a few moments later i started curling up sobbing uncontrollably and struggled to breathe. is it normal to experience random panic attacks even though you're feeling contempt and okay?

I think “normal” depends on the context. It’s common if you have a panic disorder, experienced trauma, or have DID/OSDD. If you don’t believe you have any one of those, then it’s worth seeing a professional and getting their opinion if that’s accessible to you.

We’ve had similar situations w system members dealing w traumatic memories, or getting triggered by something whoever’s fronting isn’t triggered by.

Hope that helps!

[the-rings-system]

Hey, can switching be near instant? I’m pretty sure I’m part of a system but we don’t fully switch much but when we do, it’s really fast with little noticeable dissociation before hand. Is that normal or possible?

Yeah, sometimes switching can be real fast! It varies a lot

[the-rings-system]

Hi! I kinda only hear alters when im about to sleep. I heard of this thing called hypnogagic hallucinations. I feel sad now. I feel like i made it up. Any advice?

I think it would be good to think about a few things:

1. Even if you can’t hear them, do your alters impact other parts of your life, through switching or passive influence? Many systems have really bad communication, especially in the first year or so.

2. Even if they are hallucinations, it doesn’t mean you made it up! That’s still a very real, very impactful experience to have - and your experiential validity is not diminished. Further, many voice hearers talk about having conversations with their voices, or them having personable qualities - I’d check out the hearing voices network for support & info on this

3. If you don’t know, it’s ok! It’s ok to say you don’t know, or are figuring it out, and to take as much time as you need on that.

Sending you lots of love! 💕

[the-rings-system]

Are there reasons why a system might split multiple versions of essentially the same character outside of the fact the character is a huge comfort? I’m not sure if that makes sense. We’re polyfrag and introject heavy with roughly 7-8 fictives based off of various renditions/versions of a overall character and we think we might’ve just split another and it’s making us extremely self conscious that we’re unknowingly f/king because we have that many. It can’t just simply be a hyperfixation/comfort related thing, right?

We honestly aren’t sure, but have heard our sys friends with a large headcount talk about this phenomena from time to time. Y’all aren’t alone in this 💕

(And if anyone knows things on this topic, put them down in the comments 🥰)

[the-rings-system]

Is it normal/okay for DID systems to live/work mainly through passive influence and co con ,, like when we are co con we can remember most of the basic details as to what happens ,, but if it just 1 alter fronting we have no idea what really happened ,, so we tend to stay in co con for safety ,, idk we just feel like fake atm ,, especially since we find it hard to know whose fronting even tho we know we are different ,, and because we mainly work in co con and worried we're faking

Yes! This is both a goal of a lot of DID therapy, and there’s OSDD-1 systems that present with no switching at all. Furthermore, some DID systems experience very low levels of regular amnesia - maybe only once a month or a few times a year.

I’m proud of y’all for working out a solution that keeps more folks in the loop and limits amnesia! That’s a good thing, something to celebrate - not something that should weigh on you 💕

[the-rings-system]

Hiiya! Sorry if this is a silly or confusing question >~< but something I often experience is getting triggered and not really noticing ig? Like I will get panic attack like symptoms but really only feel like mild to moderate anxiety while continuing daily functioning at at least 50% efficiency just, extra dissociative tm. ig what im asking is is this how panic attacks and triggers work normaly? or is it possible for an EP to be triggered, not front, while the ANP is mostly fine?

Yeah, we get that too! Lots of trauma survivors have been, uh, taught that we have to deal with pain, discomfort, and upsetness and still function. We often find ourselves in situations where we’ll get triggered, suppress it, and the full force of it will hit once we get home/in a safe space.

Generally, there’s also not really a “normal” when it comes to triggers. They’re based on your trauma, which is unique to everyone - so everyone’s triggers are going to be a little different, and act a little differently on them. There’s a lot of range of them within one person too - we’ll get strong triggers, delayed triggers, little triggers, ect. It’s a range of experience!

[the-rings-system]

my headmates biggest wish is to pursue his passion but said passion is very triggering for me and id rather not have to do anything with it :-( any advice on how to deal with that?

Have some serious conversations with him about it. Talk about the fact that it’s triggering, and possibly why if you’re comfortable with it. Maybe there’s a compromise you could make, and a similar activity that is less triggering for you?

[the-rings-system]

hey! is it possible for alters to go dormant, then come back but only appear to certain alters within the headspace? sorry if this is worded weirdly haha

Yes, some alters have better internal communication with other specific alters, and little to none with others. Internal communication is weird and messy, and doesn’t always line up evenly 💕