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Hi, Neil! How do you stay focused while writing? For some reason I am having a very hard time not being distracted when I try to work on a story- even with this ridiculous amount of Quarantine Free Time. Any advice?

Pretty much everyone I know (including me) is dealing with the gulf between “I suddenly have all this time, whee I am going to write all the things,” and “why aren’t I getting everything written? Why am I confused and distracted and worried?”

And all I can say is, you aren’t alone in this. Be kind to yourself. Nothing quite like this has happened in living memory, we don’t know how it’s going to end, and the world is unsafe and different. All of that takes headspace. More if you’re mourning people. 

So forgive yourself, be kind to yourself, and look out at your world from the place of “ANYTHING I get written during lockdown times is a small (or not so small) victory”.

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writing playlist: on

google docs: open

mind: ready

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Set It Up (2018) dir. Claire Scanlon

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So I just submitted my first writing of 2019 to the Chicago Tribune Nelson Algren Literary Contest (phew!) and holy mother of god did I cut it close to the deadline, within the last hour! Freshly edited and submitted, bitches!!

No wonder my heart’s been having palpitations.

To get a better grip on my submissions this year, I’ve found a bunch of contests and regular old submissions at which to frisbee my writing (with the fullest intent of getting SOMETHING to stick into publication).

Writing is hard.

Most places I’ve looked don’t take genre fiction (like sci fi or romance or horror) and I’d consider most of my short stories to be fantasy. Apparently, most literary magazines frown upon the strange magic world in which I live, and honestly, I’m mad, but they deserve pity. It must be hard to be a judge on those panels, sludging through so many self-aggrandizing paragraphs of H I G H   L I T E R A T U R E that eventually make you start to hate your fellow writer.

But hey. Someone has to read what I sent. At the very least, I hope that person enjoyed it.

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The best notes written in manuscripts by medieval monks

Colophon: a statement at the end of a book containing the scribe or owner’s name, date of completion, or bitching about how hard it is to write a book in the dark ages

Oh, my hand

The parchment is very hairy

Thank God it will soon be dark

St. Patrick of Armagh, deliver me from writing

Now I’ve written the whole thing; for Christ’s sake give me a drink

Oh d fuckin abbot

Massive hangover

Whoever translated these Gospels did a very poor job

Cursed be the pesty cat that urinated over this book during the night

If someone else would like such a handsome book, come and look me up in Paris, across from the Notre Dame cathedral

I shall remember, O Christ, that I am writing of Thee, because I am wrecked today

Do not reproach me concerning the letters, the ink is bad and the parchment scanty and the day is dark

11 golden letters, 8 shilling each; 700 letters with double shafts, 7 shilling for each hundred; and 35 quires of text, each 16 leaves, at 3 shilling each. For such an amount I won’t write again

Here ends the second part of the title work of Brother Thomas Aquinas of the Dominican Order; very long, very verbose; and very tedious for the scribe; thank God, thank God, and again thank God

If anyone take away this book, let him die the death, let him be fried in a pan; let the falling sickness and fever seize him; let him be broken on the wheel, and hanged. Amen

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when you’re trying to write and your last two functioning brain cells start yelling at each other

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Alternatives for 25 overused words in writing

1. Interesting- note worthy; thought-provoking; fascinating; attracting; appealing; attention-grabbing; captivating; gripping; invigorating; engrossing; engaging; electrifying.  

2. Beautiful- striking; stunning; magnificent; lovely; charming; gorgeous; radiant; dazzling.

3. Good- acceptable, wonderful, exceptional; positive; brilliant; first-rate; notable; stellar; favorable; superb; marvellous; prime.

4. Bad- awful; lousy; poor; unacceptable; crummy; dreadful; rough; inferior; substandard; atrocious; appalling; dreadful; defective.

5. Look- glance; fixate; observe; stare; gaze; peer; scan; watch; study; browse; eye; glimpse; review; inspect.

6. Nice- lovely; superior; pleasant; satisfying; delightful; likeable; agreeable; correct; adequate; swell; fair; okay; approved.

7. Very- extremely; exceedingly; exceptionally; immensely; tremendously; abundantly; particularly; remarkably.

8. Fine- satisfactory; worthy; respectable; exquisite; suitable; well; imposing; decent; admirable; praise-worthy; decent.

9. Happy- cheerful; delighted; pleased; content; amused; thrilled; elated; thrilled; ecstatic; on cloud 9. 

10. Really- genuinely; truly; honestly; actually; undoubtedly; certainly; remarkably; incredibly; downright; unquestionably; extremely.

11. Sad- miserable; gloomy; devastated; down at heard; distraught; distressed; dispirited; sorrowful; downcast; feeling blue; desolate.

12. Big- massive; huge; giant; gigantic; enormous; large; colossal; immense; bulky; tremendous; hefty; sizable; extensive; great; substantial. 

13. Shocked- taken aback; lost for words; flabbergasted; staggered; outraged; astonished; astounded; stunned; speechless; appalled.

14. Small- tiny; petite; mini; miniature; microscopic; minuscule; compact; pocket-sized; cramped; puny; undersized; limited; meager; modest; minute; pint-sized. 

15. Angry- irate; enraged; touchy; cross; resentful; indignant; infuriated; wound-up; worked-up; seething; raging; heated; bitter; bad-tempered; offended; frustrated. 

16. Know- understand; comprehend; realize; learn; perceive; recognize; grasp; sense.

17. Change- alter; transform; replace; diversify; adjust; adapt; modify; remodel; vary; evolve; transfigure; redesign; refashion; advance; transition; shift; adjustment.

18. Old- aged; ancient; matured; elderly; senior; veteran; decrepit; seasoned; venerable; past one’s prime; doddering; senile.

19. Think- ponder; reflect; conceive; imagine; contemplate; consider; determine; realize; visualize; guess/assume; conclude; envision. 

20. Funny- comical; ludicrous; amusing; droll; entertaining; absurd; hilarious; silly; whimsical; hysterical; joking; witty; facetious; slapstick; side-splitting; knee-slapping.

21. Go- move; proceed; advance; progress; travel; walk; journey; depart; exit; flee; make one’s way; clear out; get underway.

22. Give- grant; donate; hand-out; present; provide; deliver; hand over; offer; award; bestow; supply with; contribute to; send; entrust.

23. Get- acquire; obtain; receive; gain; earn; gather; collect; buy; purchase; attain; score; secure; take possession of; grab.

24. Easy- effortless; simple; clear; smooth; straightforward; uncomplicated; painless; accessible; apparent; basic; plain; child’s play; facile; elementary; cinch. 

25. Fast- agile; brisk; rapid; nimble; swift; accelerated; fleeting; high-speed; active; dashing; winged; hurried; turbo. 

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every writing tip article and their mother: dont ever use adverbs ever!

me, shoveling more adverbs onto the page because i do what i want: just you fucking try and stop me

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open question, jonny bolduc 

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Oblique Strategies (subtitled Over One Hundred Worthwhile Dilemmas) - created by Brian Eno and Peter Schmidt and first published in 1975. Each card offers an aphorism intended to help artists (particularly musicians) break creative blocks by encouraging lateral thinking.

These cards evolved from our separate observations of the principles underlying what we are doing. Sometimes they were recognized in retrospect (intellect catching up with intuition), sometimes they were identified as they were happening, sometimes they were formulated. They can be used as a pack (a set of posibilities being continuously reviewed in the mind) or by drawing a single card from a shuffled pack when a dilemma occurs in a working situation. In this case the card is trusted even if it appropriateness is quite unclear. They are not final, as new ideas will present themselves, and others will become self-evident. - Brian Eno

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Listen. Never be afraid to just make something.

Even if it’s a bad idea, even if it seems improbable, or amateurish, or overly complicated; even if it’s only half fleshed out and you don’t know how you’re going to finish, or it’s a medium you have never worked with before. 

You never know where it’s going to lead until you try, and I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how often you’ll come out the other side with something you’re proud of. Even if you don’t, I promise you’ll learn something valuable for next time.

Eventually, somewhere along the line, you may discover a talent or a passion you never realized you had. Only by making things can you discover your identity as an artist.

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“The way Rilke describes colours—their intercourse within a painting, a single colour’s evolution through history—that’s how one might also describe words: their interaction and interplay within a poem, a single word’s history from one age to another, punctuated by contributions of individual authors. His eyes trained by Cézanne, Rilke reaches out to language for words that would express the nuances of colour, and the biography of blue spills out into the realm of language: a barely-blue, a blue dove-gray, a densely quilted blue, an ancient Egyptian shadow-blue, a waxy blue, a self-contained blue, a wet dark blue, a listening blue, a thunderstorm blue, a bourgeois cotton blue, a light cloudy bluishness, a juicy blue, and, in van Gogh’s landscapes, full of revolt, Blue, Blue, Blue.”

— Elena Maslova-Levin, “Rainer Maria Rilke on Colour and Self-Awareness” (via linguisten)