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If I was a mage in the dungeon meshi universe, I'd figure out how to enchant living paintings and then commission some artists to paint me a bunch of pictures of magnificent feasts. Then I'd rent out a gallery space and charge entry to my Magical Food Hall, where you can eat as much of anything you want and not experience any of the consequences. Think of the possibilities. I'm not just talking about calories and weight loss here. I'd have a painting of a bakery where gluten-free people can gorge themselves on bread and cakes and then leap out of the painting before the vomiting sets in. I'd have an ice cream parlor for the lactose intolerant. One painting is just called "The Allergen Feast" and is a table laden with things like nuts, soy products, shellfish, etc. I'd have a painting of a county fair with the most insane types of fried food imaginable. I'm planning an expansion, but first I gotta consult some religious experts to see if eating imaginary painted food that isn't kosher/halal is technically against the rules or not.

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Sky puppies

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I say "oh don't worry he doesn't bite" and you're confused because you don't see any dog but then you notice a single inchworm moving purposefully across the floor towards you at an alarming pace

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Details I would ask my artist to include in my portrait to communicate the glorious wealth and bounty of mine noble estate

XXL Costco pack of toilet paper, still sealed to demonstrate that the need was not desperate

Dresser in the background with top two drawers both just a little open to show that overflowing piles of clean socks and underwear prevent it from closing all the way

An open container of raspberries, the fastest-moulding of the expensive luxury fruits, showing that I purchased fresh produce recently and at full price for no special occasion

The walls are painted a vibrant colour and covered in hanging art, showing that I have the legal freedom to modify my own living space and may even own property

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the name "theresa" is so funny like. theres a what

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Fuck moon’s taking poison damage

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Had to ban the phrase “tricky dick” from my classroom during watergate lesson because saying the word dick in front of 30 fifteen year olds is like lighting a bomb and throwing it through the doorway but now they’re just calling him Richard the Treacherous like they’re all medieval peasants. gonna lose it

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who up dinking they oiter

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They are shaped the same...like friends ready to hug

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William Balfour Ker (1906)

From the Depths

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Proof cats are liquid

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Aziracrow bantering with Vinylatte

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hey stop scrolling really quick!!

...

You feel a black wind blow through you. All weapons dropped to Level 1!

okay you can keep scrolling now ^_^

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Fun fact: by just using imaginary numbers, some Evil Math, and 101 rotating vectors You Can Create a shitty approximation of a fish.

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Is this anything