teacupsandcyanide

[teacupsandcyanide]

simm!master is a raccoon. sits in the rubbish tip and eats with his little hands. skittering about and cackling to himself. ten is the pest control man they send in to deal with him because ten thinks he has a "mysterious bond" with the feral raccoon. one time the raccoon did attack ten's boss that he hates but this does not change the fact that ten had to get the rabies virus because of this one raccoon.

missy is a cat. one of those super inbred but really intelligent breeds. super long hair that gets on fucking everything and she always bites the groomer and leaves their hands in shreds. except for twelve. twelve says it's because she's an inside cat and only allows her to have supervised trips outside. unfortunately missy led twelve's cat sitter bill straight to the feral racoon that lives in the skip outside twelve's flat and the raccoon gave bill rabies.

spymaster is a chihuahua. really really really overstimulated 24/7. constantly pissing himself with excitement whenever he sees thirteen. tries to bite every one of thirteen's visitors. thirteen is trying to get rid of him but has this thing about not abandoning pets and no one else will take him so she's stuck with him. he's actually a qualified medical alert dog, so he lets thirteen know she has a mysterious genetic disorder that's giving her memory issues. but he never alerts for anyone else. and he bit her while alerting her, so.

[teacupsandcyanide]

did Missy give twelve’s Friend Clara’s boyfriend toxoplasmosis

simm!master is a raccoon. sits in the rubbish tip and eats with his little hands. skittering about and cackling to himself. ten is the pest control man they send in to deal with him because ten thinks he has a "mysterious bond" with the feral raccoon. one time the raccoon did attack ten's boss that he hates but this does not change the fact that ten had to get the rabies virus because of this one raccoon.

missy is a cat. one of those super inbred but really intelligent breeds. super long hair that gets on fucking everything and she always bites the groomer and leaves their hands in shreds. except for twelve. twelve says it's because she's an inside cat and only allows her to have supervised trips outside. unfortunately missy led twelve's cat sitter bill straight to the feral racoon that lives in the skip outside twelve's flat and the raccoon gave bill rabies.

spymaster is a chihuahua. really really really overstimulated 24/7. constantly pissing himself with excitement whenever he sees thirteen. tries to bite every one of thirteen's visitors. thirteen is trying to get rid of him but has this thing about not abandoning pets and no one else will take him so she's stuck with him. he's actually a qualified medical alert dog, so he lets thirteen know she has a mysterious genetic disorder that's giving her memory issues. but he never alerts for anyone else. and he bit her while alerting her, so.

[teacupsandcyanide]

jack harkness: how's the newly regenerated COCK doctor 😜

graham: small leave me alone

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If you’re pining you need to stop and pick a different tree. You know, spruce it up a little

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god i wish that fucking kid didnt have such bad aim

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on the bright side maybe if he gives a lot of money to elon musk elon will go to space in one of his terrible rockets and well i'm sure you can imagine

[teacupsandcyanide]

no! "sapphic yearning" will kill the patient

she needs hardcore lezzing out in order to live

[teacupsandcyanide]

a little bit of castiel in my life

ladies and gentlemen. this is blorbo number five.

[teacupsandcyanide]

I can never leave my phone unattended in thishouse

I Am Gay hashtag true

[teacupsandcyanide]

got chased by a skeleton but when they caught me they just gave me a kiss and hug. turns out it was an xoskeleton.

[teacupsandcyanide]

You cannot say that a top grossing artist is "feral" or making you "feral." You are listening to the Billboard Top 40. You are very domesticated.

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you can tell that ian chesterton is not normal because he is a science teacher. science teachers are rarely normal

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unfortunately i cant resist making this man sad

(the bottom 2 are unfinished things i gave up on. i dont think i will ever finish them so um. yeah)

[teacupsandcyanide]

Commenters praise the girls frugality

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"Dragon," poem assembled using quotations from Wikipedia articles

[teacupsandcyanide]

I Am Gay hashtag true

[teacupsandcyanide]

Fic: Marriage is Cheap

Rating: General

Words: 7,895

Fandom: Beetlejuice (Films)

Pairings: Lydia Deetz/Beetlejuice

Summary: Lydia, without meaning to, gets in the habit of summoning Beetlejuice. There will surely be no consequences to this.

Notes: This was way too much fun to write lol, gotta love coming up with cartoonish gags for Beetlejuice to do.