talldl

[talldl]

I need a best friend who pulls my shirt down when my waistband is showing in public, fixing it without a word.

One who discreetly asks me if I have any spare changes with.

Who asks me how I’m doing every hour or so and keeps an eye on how much I’m drinking.

Who doesn’t mind helping me find a spot to change or assisting me even.

One who doesn’t bat an eye when I very obviously have an accident while we’re napping cuddled on the couch.

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I need a best friend who simply understands, accepts and maybe cares for me in the gentlest most platonic ways.

Laughing when I settle in for the LOTR marathon because I didn’t even bother trying to hide the pretty printed abdl diaper beneath a band tee I stole from them.

Commenting playfully on how they’re jealous I won’t have to get up for potty breaks.

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A best friend who keeps spare diapers for me and maybe other supplies over at their place! They could ask me to stay the night on a whim and I wouldn’t even need to bring anything!!

They probably took this opportunity to stock diapers they specifically wanted to see on me…

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A best friend who might insist on cutting my food up for me at the restaurant, despite my protest. They know I’m specific about what I eat and how I eat it.

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A best friend who leads me to a secluded spot or a private bathroom without warning at some sort of big event. Telling me I need to change, no choice or questions about it as they hand me supplies they packed. Asking if I need or want help maybe..

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I need a best friend who helps or guides me in the littlest ways, accepting me for who I am and embracing it.

I want a true connection, someone whom I can be vulnerable and intimate with very comfortably.

Someone with whom I can be silly and unashamed. Affectionately, honestly...

[talldl]

Hi. I enjoy your posts. Is your husband abdl also?

Yes he is, we actually met on diaper-bois dot com

[talldl]

Do you like the XP5000?

Mixed feelings, it's certainly an absorbent option, high quality plastic, I'm struggling with the hook and loops tapes though, not convinced yet

[talldl]

Hi, I hope your doing well. Do you wear diapers 24/7 and when did you start wearing them? I’m in Tennessee right by Dollywood.

I started wearing 247 in May 2021, mainly as a dare from a friend for 2 weeks, then didn't stop.

[talldl]

What are your top 3-5 kinks?

Diapers

Casts

Catheters

Wheelchair

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Night diaper 🥰

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Good morning kiddos! How did you sleep? Evidently I slept like a 🪵

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Very needed rest stop change on the way back home!

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Stash organizing is pretty satisfying 😁

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Heavy drinking in the evening means heavy diapers in the morning 😜💦☺️

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I hate the bottom shelf 🙈 https://www.instagram.com/p/CipsnuHrT6K/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

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T'was a beautiful day for a walk! ☀️☀️🐕☀️☀️

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I am very proud of this tape job 😊

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I am the luckiest guy ever, how did that not leak 😱

[talldl]

Some call wearing 24/7 "unpotty training". But does that make sense? Is that really in a sense what happens when you untrain?

Hi, anon. Yes.

The structure of your question suggests you know this, but I'm going to clarify for anyone who (somehow) doesn't: wearing 24/7 and unpotty training are different things.

Wearing 24/7 consists of wearing diapers 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Virtually all people who start unpotty training will be wearing 24/7. However, untraining specifically means sustaining a significant loss of continence due to a change in your behaviour.

I've voiced this before, but my experience has been that wearing 24/7 and unpotty training aren't completely separate, because wearing 24/7 encourages behaving in a way that promotes untraining, and that pressure self-reinforces and becomes more intense the more continence you lose. However, nominally you can wear 24/7 without unpotty training.

As for whether "unpotty training" is an accurate description, I would say yes. Toilet training consists of a set of behavioural routines which take advantage of the development of particular biological capacities.

In the first place, untraining overwrites those behavioural routines, because, for example, the untrainee relearns to void their bladder and/or bowels in places other than the toilet, and because the incentive not to void their bladder and/or bowels at a specific time is removed — with messing it is heavily attenuated, with wetting it is pretty much completely erased.

In the second place, the core biological capacity on which toilet training depends is the ability to recognise and control bodily functions. A behavioural program of unvaryingly refusing to control one's bodily functions weakens the mechanisms of control through disuse, eventually to the point that they can no longer be used to control those functions. Since the point of voiding urge is to encourage the person to relax their muscles of control, and untraining means the muscles of control are always relaxed, the ability to recognise urge becomes a moot point.

With regard to toilet training, therefore, the first two stages of untraining are more or less: not doing it, and not being able to do it. My experience has been that there is a third stage: unlearning how to do it.

The perception is that motor memory cannot be forgotten. This is more or less true. However, it can be overwritten. I used a typing tutor to learn how to type, but then developed my own typing style, which is faster but more error-prone. I don't forget how to type in my own style even after weeks away from the computer, but I cannot remember for the life of me how I was actually taught. Similarly, I can ride a bike fine, but I can't remember how to ride one badly.

I have not had bladder control for the better part of a decade, basically due to continence habits that I developed and nurtured in the second half of 2012, and the evolutions and effects thereof. I have decent sense memory — I can still remember reasonably clearly some sensory aspects of what it felt like to be voluntarily peeing. However, I don't have motor memory to go with it. I don't remember how things are supposed to feel moving around down there. I cannot remember how to make peeing either start or stop.

I have previously mentioned the "five-year rule" on this blog — if you've been incontinent for five years, don't expect to get any significant amount of control back — and I strongly suspect that simply forgetting muscle memory plays a huge part. It's much easier to relearn when you've only been a little while out of it; it's harder when you've forgotten everything you ever learned.

In short, I would say that yes, untraining is more or less equivalent to literally reversing potty training. There is one significant difference, which is that the transition from precontinence to toilet training is enabled by rapid early childhood development. The state of incontinence 10 years after untraining does not have a similar path out. If you give up your continence, it's gone.

[talldl]

I find it difficult to pee sitting, lying down and while walking, what can I do?

Good question. Here is what I would advise.

Cultivate the need to pee. If you don't yet feel comfortable peeing while sitting, lying down or walking, I am guessing you're at a stage where you are not peeing continuously and are probably still holding pee in your bladder and wetting in discrete bursts, a la toileting. Use this to your advantage. Stay hydrated; if you can't wet in a given position, stay in that position and let the urge build up. The stronger the urge, the more of an impulse you will have to overcome it.

Holding your bladder, or more generally allowing your bladder to fill to the point that you feel the need to pee, certainly sounds counterproductive to untraining; it might even slow down your untraining a bit. However, that will be more than compensated for by developing the ability to pee in any position, which will speed things from that point forward.

Use the right protection. Use diapers which have sufficient coverage and absorbency that you feel comfortable. Consider supplementing them with an outer layer of diapering, such as a cloth diaper or large pair of cloth training pants (I wouldn't recommend disposable diapers or training pants for use as an outer layer). Consider insulating the whole arrangement with waterproof pants.

Protect your furniture. Use a mattress protector on your bed and a chair protector on the chair you most commonly use. If the sheets on your bed are of a colour that easily stains, switch them out for ones that don't, such as black ones. Have an idea of how to wash your chair and mattress protectors. Against the possibility that they somehow manage not to do their job, have an elementary idea of how to wash your seat cushion and mattress (it's not easy, but it can be done!).

P.S. As to walking, I don't clearly recall my own untraining at this point, but I seem to remember that learning to wet while walking was something that evolved naturally from being able to wet more easily in general, rather than something I had to specifically invest time into.