#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights
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the image of neil having an slight death glow around him at times (not related to the entity most of the time) and it being stronger sometimes *related to his health issues*
#chronic health cw#death mention cw#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#~taking aim~ mun post#(something about how he's always sort of surrounded by death)#(and what the entity is/how it happened)#(then its like 'oh i'll bite it before anybody i know does' only for the guy he likes to tragically die)
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lockwood, not minding dressing up nice/opts to daily neil, dislikes dressing up will always get by as best he can at social events where it’s required by wearing an leather suit jacket if can’t just wear one of his leather jackets etc (has his dramatic uniform for ghost excursions) other than that would rather not opt for dress/fancy attire
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the entity growing/learning alongside neil is neat, but also i love the dynamic of neil just like ‘ah yes i miss when communication was vague and this thing couldn’t form real sentences cuz now alongside feeling the vast disappointment over my actions, i can now add another voice scolding me for drinking coffee with my health conditions’
#chronic health cw#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#(the communication between them is sure interesting)#(im just thinking of when the entity hits the point where is active and to an point engages slightly with those who arent neil etc)#('something keeps nudging my tea around' neil just like .... im well aware the culprit is connected to me and wont stop despite pleas)
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"⌛"
✧ —𝐀 𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐏 𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐍 𝐌���𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐘 𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐄
Send "⌛" for a glimpse into my muse's past in the form of a flashback.
"Anthony!" He nearly tumbled down the stairs in shock at the shout. Couldn't recall anything that he did which might have earned it. Barely poking his head into the kitchen, to see what the commotion was about. Answer coming in the form of the crisp bag. "What I left you some." "One and all the crumbs." Watching it get crumpled up and ducking his head out of it's range. "Brat." Eyes poking back around as he scooped it up off the ground. Tossing it into the bin and sticking his tongue out. "Well you ate all the biscuits so I at least was thoughtful." Dead silence as she clearly thought over if wanted to dignify it with an response. Meanwhile he hopped up on the counter; feet and legs swinging while grabbing the stuff to make himself tea. Peace truce in reaching for her mug. The way she offered it to him. "Let me know when it's ready, I need to fix my eyeliner." "Why? It looks fine." "I have an date later, if you can manage to not commit arson or wreck the place that is for once." "Gross and I'm not an baby." "You have permanent baby brother status, hate to break it to ya kiddo." His entire face scrunched up more and she laughed. Meanwhile he just proceeded to scowl as took note of the time on the wall clock. For how long it would be till the tea was ready. "Whatever, I can manage without you promise." "Great, shout if you burn yourself or whatever."
#long post cw#~inquisitive minds want to know ~ inquires for lockwood#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#(sibling bickering semi happy flashback)
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Neil was sat by the fire pits, stretched across an couch enjoying the atmosphere without being too strongly an part of it. Watching some guy appear and look confused at the messy table. Mostly of paper scraps, writing utensils. Immediately eyes wandered to him, “So what’s this about?” Exhausted- so he merely gestured from the table to the fire pits. “You write down regrets, or dreams, wishes whatever appeals and let the fire eat it up either to get rid of it or to give it better odds of coming true.” Explaining it poorly, the history of it and associated with the choice. But he was still an newcomer to the event himself. The other seemed to consider it before grabbing an gold gel pen and hastily scribbling something on an little black strip of paper. Into the fire it went. “Hi, can I sit?” Neil swung his body so he was sitting up in response. And before long they were talking about anything, everything. Hands tugging at his; racing through the night streets and then the pen gliding on his skin. “You should return that- next Tuesday.” -------- “Okay- you’re not supposed to ask what’s on the paper.” “That’s superstitious.” “Well I mean the rules actually vary... And that being said, what did you so eagerly throw into the fiery pits if you care to share? I’ll share mine.” The two of them were far too close on the couch. Neil was so very aware of it; especially given the partying had settled down around them. Eventually reach the point would opt to help with clean up before heading home. Watching the other think. Wildfire crush. “It was about you, so what was your burnt offering earlier?” So caught up trying to process it he was dead silent for several minutes. Before remembering how to speak. “It was? Oh uh to survive an Fittes party.” Forgetting to breathe as the other scooted closer and seemed so clearly amused by the last part. “Duh. You’re an agent?” “No uh just family obligations or whatever.” “Right, so can I kiss you or?” “Yeah.” ---------- Fingers carefully held the strip of paper; exact pen and scrap to recreate that first one apparently. Neil found it so sickeningly adorable. On the floor of that bedroom, waiting for the other to return from the kitchen with snacks. Propping up some as heard muffled arguing in the hallway. Before the door opened to reveal the other and glimpse of some girl. Who glared at him before vanishing, slam of an door. The door shut slowly as he sat on the ground; putting the snacks down. “Sorry, my sister is in an mood today.” Ah- the infamous sister that explained it. Would never grasp having an sibling personally. Sitting up to grab for the bag of crisps after carefully pocketing the paper. “All good; take it had an long night training young agents?” “Yep, I however in contrast did well on my case and have swayed you into hanging around here.” “Well you wanted to hang in the daylight but private- and it was sort of the only option but sure.” ----------- She was an wreck; surprising him with imparting the news. As well for whatever reason the disdain had been apparent. Not taking too much heart in when it turned into blaming him for some reason she didn’t state. Maybe he should have reacted more or differently but was silent. Which seemed to get under her skin. From the way she stalked off. And he stood there on the sidewalk in front of the house. Before shoving hands in his pockets well at least it was an event night. He’d go even if his boyfriend wasn’t going to be tagging along- not by choice. And once there he probably burned an couple dozen strips of paper. Most of them wanting to undo the circumstances. Maybe he was to blame; an bit and it sucked.
#death mention cw#long post cw#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#(thinking about the big traumatic event and like the way it impacted neil? especially to have his dead boyfriend's sister viscerally cruel)#(how even before it her attitude was mostly from being protective of her younger brother but after it shifts to be even more negative)#(but neil just lives with it/kind of blames himself too even though obviously it was case gone wrong which had nothing to do with him)#(i could write so much about the relationship+the aftermath encounters after the death etc)#(this is an good collection of drabbles regarding it though)
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thinking about costs, naturally to talents and...
-lockwood’s migraines, that his eyes can be so sensitive (how if even if try to head it off+remembers his sunglasses etc but that he ends up with 2 people to be gentle about it/help him out) *image of one of them carrying one of his spare pairs just in case he forgets and putting them on him when notice it might be helpful* -neil and his feedback loops+causes of death affecting his already not the healthiest body n rather poor mental health *especially post the big trauma incident/constantly getting blamed by somebody else affected by the death* (only himself, the entity but mostly really has to claw his way out by his lonesome as the entity can only do so much) plus well 1 good scare could probably kill him *as well what the entity does has strain on him which neither party knows till it happens in an fast paced disaster situation*
#death mention cw#chronic health cw#~you just might end up dead~ lockwood insights#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#(why yes i have so many thoughts about the two of them all the time- even when i'm on my other blog being !!! about my passion project oc)
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i’m thinking about the entity connection,
-of neil trying to hang out with somebody *or more than one person* and it getting jealous... neil just like “you’re not my whole world for once, get over it you don’t have to hang around” (this can happen in several capacities and it’s intense cuz generally the entity seems to be really caring as much can be fickle etc+new territory)
-neil in severe pain, agony and maybe kind of half dying so the entity seeks out somebody to help *either an known party or not* giving an feeling at best, but regardless revealing itself and like plz save him (which also the entity and like major danger to neil just becoming so substantial, able to do things like tear other ghosts apart etc) -the more light hearted, little movements of things/taps *possibly attempting to communicate/befriend somebody* especially if it’s to be like ‘yeah he’s stupid but he needs an friend don’t focus only on the bristles’ or like to be included if his presence is known even if they can’t pick up on it
#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#(so many thoughts about their dynamic and thread potential etc)
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the way neil doesn’t get along with any other teens in his social circle/from his community and that it shapes an lot of why he is so wary of interacting with other teenagers+so bristly etc vs
‘i kind of just found myself as an behind the scene partner, occasional host of this past curfew event to let loose in our messed up reality after stumbling upon it 1 time and will take the whole fall were it to all go really wrong’ he’s pretty caring, his spikes aside (which also the way he just lets somebody blame them for an whole death, he wasn’t an part of and is like i get this is their grief, choosing to be mad at me *even though it can get pretty intense and does fuck him up some as well he lost the person tragically too*)
#death mention cw#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#(he's very kind just many factors that lead to being bad at interacting with other teens)#(it really does vary though- for example he'll very much be laid back at the warehouse parties)
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🎸 - Can your muse play any instruments? Do they play them often, or rarely? How actually skilled are they at playing them? (This one's for Neil)
☠ ― 𝑀𝑖𝑠𝑐𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑒𝑜𝑢𝑠 𝑆𝑦𝑚𝑏𝑜𝑙 𝐻𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠. He was taught piano, in that sort of no real reason why but why not. Probably an slight reason for the lessons mainly being to try occupying him. Rather proficient but only really likes to play when alone; in very rare moods. Pretty good singer, self taught and can play both electric guitar, bass. In fact frequently gets swayed into little performances at the past curfew warehouse gatherings he happened upon and stumbled into frequenting, organizing when it's his turn. Best at electric guitar as it's what he has, does as an hobby most frequently.
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🍡 - Can your muse cook? Can they bake? How well can they do either? Do they have any kitchen disaster stories?
☠ ― 𝑀𝑖𝑠𝑐𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑒𝑜𝑢𝑠 𝑆𝑦𝑚𝑏𝑜𝑙 𝐻𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠.
Lockwood, can't really cook just doesn't have the patience and or thought of 'okay i'm going to do an multi step process' especially given is pretty bad at telling when he's hungry sometimes. Can make pasta without issue but that's it. As for baking; he can make cookies but hasn't tried to bake much otherwise. Probably was banned from the kitchen when young. Doesn't really remember an lot of the disaster tales which led to it. One from before his sister died tends to stick out, where he managed to burn some toast and stubbornly insisted it wasn't that bad. Eating both slices unbuttered- while his sister was just like 'you're such an idiot.' ----- Neil can cook, bake but his parents generally don't like him doing so for his safety. Also usually doesn't need to if there is leftovers or per usual his living off things like after long night 8 am doughnuts and coffee. Has an naturally small/hard to decipher appetite but snacks through out the day. Several, one that the people in his social circle tend to bring up sometimes (usually to make fun of him/the other kids) being one time be just blacked out head first into an cake he just finished frosting. Has frosting in his hair for the rest of the day even after numerous washings.
#~be careful when~ inquires for neil#~inquisitive minds want to know ~ inquires for lockwood#~you just might end up dead~ lockwood insights#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#spiritguidead
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🎶 - What kind of music does your muse listen to? Do they have a favorite genre? Do you think the aux cord would be taken away from them?
☠ ― 𝑀𝑖𝑠𝑐𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑒𝑜𝑢𝑠 𝑆𝑦𝑚𝑏𝑜𝑙 𝐻𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠.
Lockwood very much likely is most used to classical music, jazz and that being said does enjoy classic+rock music and would probably call rock his favorite. (that being said he probably wouldn't mind some most obnoxious seeming songs but unlikely to get banned from the aux+probably wouldn't want the aux cord)
------ Neil likes all sorts of music, the louder and more chaotic sometimes the better. Favorite is folk punk. Hangs around an lot of people who like music or on the flip side are classical music snobs. Has definitely gotten noise complaints for having loud rock music playing before. Could likely get the aux taken away, but depends on what he chooses to play and the company he's with.
#~be careful when~ inquires for neil#~inquisitive minds want to know ~ inquires for lockwood#~you just might end up dead~ lockwood insights#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights
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thinking about how neil is really awful with people (might be wealthy/an circle of other teens from the gated area he lives but he’s very much the outsider) but he participates-gets along with his little warehouse partying community not too bad that he was introduced into -about that the person who showed him the secret night life, is dead (and that his sister very much blames him just by associating with her brother/is an agent who frequently crosses paths with him)
-the way he’s got his health issues etc but is very like ‘so anyways ghost research and trying to figure out all my weirdness? the entity that seems like an hobby to pursue’ as if his parents didn’t have him home tutored,etc to try minimizing problems/the way he is so hyper sensitive to ghosts (more than even they- or him know)
-he has severe disdain for parties (is obligated to attend an lot due to his father working for deprac/wealth his family has etc) especially the more stuck up they seem to be; will usually have an ‘i’m only here for 1 hour’ type of deal *also tries to be in an little magazines+spot light possible*
-lots of medical knowledge given his conditions+his mother working in the medical field especially after he was born and casual about it
#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#(like he sure isnt winning in the people skills department but that's also not true)#(especially if you get to know him/or see him in his element ie the warehouse parties)
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(thinking about his abilities so i’m going to babble)
-neil has this ‘entity’ that’s been with him since forever, doesn’t act like an regular ghost and its an mystery he wishes to investigate/main reason he starts seeking ghosts that go bump in the night
*can communicate vaguely depending but also can’t do anything except in big events where might say fling neil across an room to save him etc* -’feedback loop’ kind of like when Lucy was living through the death moment
(except its far more intense, he can tend to get the wounds/really gets almost basically possessed by the ghost’s strong emotions if died hysterically crying- he’s going to be crying his eyes out)
handling the source cuts the tie but not entirely *if the victim of an murder wants revenge he’ll be seething with that emotion unsure if it’s his or theirs for hours depending on the intensity* -given tends to work alone it means really has to rely on himself to escape the emotional feedback loops, ghosts of whatever happened to the dead spirit etc. (is good though in cases where he gets swept up in especially rage filled loops)
-the ‘entity’ attached to him tends to keep hidden from others/isn’t actually always around; can communicate/do things especially in emergencies+save neil it’s costly though+taxing especially on neil so it’s usually very calculated (can fight other ghosts, drag them into the other side etc but also just like neil doesn’t know Their limits/really much of anything)
-which the entity can kind of be an huge brat especially as growth happens+if neil befriends other teens and the entity chooses to be known/chilling might be cases of taps getting turned on,etc (especially if is trying to get neil to stop ignoring them+or communicate and neil is being like ‘you cant make me share that i got stabbed yesterday with them’)
-they don’t have to communicate in words+its more telepathic understanding between the two+emotional bonded things that being said neil especially when upset/they are arguing will be like “Oh come on get over yourself, why don’t you piss off wherever you vanish off to and leave me alone” (sometimes the entity writes on a fogged up mirror or communicates is tossed pillows etc)
#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights#(just an couple of the thoughts in my head idk how coherent it is lol)
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Eyes stared hard at the giant iron gate; meant to keep ghosts and arguably regular people away as well. Taking in the distance, height and sharp points. But that didn’t stop shoes hitting against the ground hard. If he could just get over before anybody stopped him. Hearing the shout from whoever was currently keeping watch. Swerving away from the hands grabbing to try halting him. He could make it over- climbing it with ease until his trousers caught on some sharp bit. Toppling him over it; upside down facing dirt out of reach. “I’m dead, so dead.” Managing to rip free only to lay there out of oxygen. Ignoring the appearance of the adult standing over him. All the words about how his parents would be told about the escape attempt later. Sulking as he followed back into safety, boredom and he knew it was better than many other’s experience. Yet he had really been hoping to run away; see his first ghost. Make it more substantial and real. The strange entity he’d come to be aware of just didn’t seem the same. ------- “You’re so weird.” Fingers stopped tracing along the bookshelf edges; hunt for information to make his first ghostly situation easier abandoned. Another teen donning the uniform of their place of employment. Meanwhile he was in his standard attire and probably looked out of place. Yet he merely straightened up with an grin. “Sorry if this is rude but did they teach you to be so judgemental or was it natural talent?” It wasn’t met well, didn’t help this corner of the library was empty. Flash of metal being pulled out it’s sheath. He really didn’t have time for the trouble he’d just caused. Moving before it could keep him pinned in space to get beaten up. Weaving through the area until found some old barely ever used desk to crawl under. Pulling the chair in even if would be far too tight a squeeze to not cause injury. And he stayed there for what felts eons. Emerging eventually to resume researching- but then seeing the time scrambling out. Needed to make the trek to where the job was. But first, perhaps he also needed an disguise for identity hiding reasons. ------- Flourish of the rapier and the sound of it cutting through the air. Keeping it from colliding where the ghost had just been. Surprised by the metallic taste in his mouth. Of course he knew it well- for medical reasons but this didn’t have the same nature to it. That’s when realized it was actual blood. Hopping into the nearby circle and swiping a glove at his mouth. It didn’t make sense. Shaking it off and exiting back towards the spot he’d been trying to pry open. The ghost was being persistent to try keeping him away from the source. Yet he managed; quickly retrieving the object and containing it before just allowing himself to rest. Take a breath; think about what the next steps were. ------- He watched the bat taken to the old technology before him. Sound of glass breaking; the others kids having the time of their life. Being extended the bat by her manicured hands. Take part in the chaos- that was normal but not really. And he didn’t belong in this crowd. Yet he took it, to make her happy and so she wouldn’t go running to his parents about it. Eyes closing as he smashed at the wreckage. Before letting it rest against the ground; still in his hands as regarded his environment. Reeling like he was going to hit it again. Then sending it flying through the field at the exclamations from the others. Ignoring the look on her face as he took off running across the grass. -------- Stretched across several seats; bidding time until no longer had to stay there. He didn’t mind hospitals unlike most. Especially regarding the problem had made people all the more ill at ease with such surroundings. But it was the sort of reliable places he’d known since young childhood. Especially given having a doctor as an parent. Putting one hand into the air, arm stiff and straight as spread fingers out to disperse the green glow of light fixtures. Not even angling his head as soft footsteps approached. “You are to go straight home, get some rest.” He gave some sign or noise of recognition as carefully sat up. Scooping up his bag with a ever so polite thanks. Waiting for the nurse to leave before actually getting up. Didn’t even slightly rush to leave- it wasn’t like he was there for his nightly activities. He’d rather die than have it be the case. Sure he wasn’t looking forward to the dinner conversation of it’s inadvisable for him to have sleepless nights. Which he had no control over except for how he spent them. But he’d not even been up to such things for the past week. --------- Lighter between tips of his fingers; some part of him wondered if setting the place ablaze would do the trick. Especially given the feedback the place carried. Sure he dealt with the ghosts, but he couldn’t shake the horrible histories and causes of death he’d figured out during the job. Flicking it open, closed for what felt hours but was only minutes. Before pocketing it- starting to put the sources he’d found inside his bag. Get them disposed of; before others would be dropping things by the furnaces. Bag slinging over his shoulders as he made a hasty exit. One arm wrapping around his mid section to try keep himself together emotionally. Could get all hysteric over it when done with it all and in the safety of his room back home. Which was easier said than done, but he did manage to hold off until he’d scaled the fence and then the side of his house. Collapsing on the floor to fall apart until he could change, stow everything and pass out into the endless state of unconscious whimsy. ---------- He agreed with quite an few; rich people throwing parties so often and all was fairly tacky. Yet that was part of his life, even if he didn’t like it. Only of a certain standard though given never got along with others remotely around his age. Plus he found his own sort of social gatherings. More exclusive for people he could tolerate being around. Tying the evening’s bracelet around his wrist. Fluffing his hair up as put on the final touches to his outfit. And when he reached the warehouse- he made it past security with ease. Observing the groups of people, faint music, and most of all the fire pit. Table of pens, paper scraps. Abandoned various little items from lighters to sticker sheets. Making his way for it and as quickly possible jotting down on the right colored paper. His wish, to never have to give up the newfound nightly hobby of ghost business. Flicking it into the flames with a deep breath. Turning to notice the awkward looking guy he never had seen before. And somehow becoming his tour guide. As they parted, surprised when the other kissed him and almost falling backwards. “Uhm see you around- I’ve got to get going before sunrise or my parents would drown me in iron for breaking curfew.” Exaggeration. Bit of one lousy excuse but he couldn’t make his brain work again. “Your lips taste really nice though.” Feeling his face warm up- taking it as his cue to weave out of sight. Through the crowd and then run till he ran out of breath along the pavement.
#long post cw#hospital mention cw#partying cw#death mention cw#(some thoughts and drabbles regarding him)#(l.ockwood's first one for his tag will be following later)#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights
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thinking about how l.ockwood seems like he wouldn’t be the warmest individual (yet- doesn’t hesitate to compliment people on their merits and does laugh/smile a lot around george n lucy) however, neil embodies you couldn’t pry warmth from my cold dead hands with a crowbar energy at least when working *but it also varies* like he’s also very formally raised/in socialization though far less in terms of interacting with anybody around his age (that being said if he’s ever not so serious/around the right people it’s just like he will unless not given permission stretch across your lap and list off why the size of links in a chain affect it’s ability to function as intended)
#~taking aim~ mun post#(both are honestly fascinating individuals)#~you just might end up dead~ lockwood insights#~disappears without a trace~ neil insights
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