#~.... it's a doozy...... and i'm still drabbling the next bit.........

[iamthecomet]

Random question because of your amazing Aether retiring drabble (is that the word?), but do writers get a bit of a power kick when they look back at the notes and see how people react because oh boy, that one was a doozy lol so so good, so powerful, hit very close to home with me and it made me so sad but I love how you write it out. It isn't the stereotypical case of the sads where one crawls in a bed and weeps, you gave Dew actual emotions he couldn't even get out or grasp in private. I love that. So good. I just had to come and gush to you real quick, sorry to bug you. Have a good one <3

First of all, you are NEVER bothering me by coming into my ask box to talk about my writing! PLEASE. It's my favorite thing. Thank you. I'm really glad it hit with you. I'm sorry it made you sad--but it is sad. I'm still sad about it too. I hurt myself when I was writing it. And I'm glad it landed. It's really important to me (as a writer) to try to get emotions onto the page accurately. They're messy. Hard to understand and explain. Complicated. Any sort of bombshell is usually accompanied by a wall of emotions--figuring them out is next to impossible. And that's the reason I like writing angst. I like digging into those things and thinking about them--about that weird numbness that settles over you when things like that happen and your brain needs to protect itself. It's important to me to get characters (even demons from hell) right. And I'm so, so glad that you appreciated it because I work really hard on writing emotion that way <3. And to answer your question. Yes. Absolutely. Power trip. Little jolts of serotonin. Especially when it's angst. Hurting other people with my writing makes me giggle. I'm a fucking monster. But I love reading tags. I go back to them sometimes just to revisit those little happiness jolts when I need them. They make me very happy and make me feel like the things I'm throwing into the void are actually landing somewhere--and making someone's day brighter (or sadder, depending, oops). Thank you for this ask! Seriously. I'm an attention whore (aren't we all) and I love talking about my writing.

[damnedcrybaby]

CHEAT SHEET: THE BACKGROUND STORY

Quick info: MULTI-VERSE / MULTI-SHIP / OC / FANDOMLESS / RP Default Verse: WESTERN / COUNTRYSIDE AND JUST TRYING TO SURVIVE Link for: CAROLINE // DANIEL // ELIJAH // & the RULES!

Caroline & Daniel have the same mother (Lilly) and father (Levi). Elijah has a different mother (Melanie), but the same father (Levi) as the other two.

Fun bit is-- none of them knew that until recently...

Levi Jackson, the father of all three- lovingly referred to as PAPA by Caroline & Daniel- had Elijah with an old girlfriend (Melanie), back when they were quite young. Melanie wasn’t comfortable with Levi’s racketeering schemes, but his only other option for honest work was to go back to caring for his father’s homestead, as a farmer: which, she assumed correctly, wouldn’t pay the bills. This led to the dissolution of their relationship, but after Elijah was born, his mother decided to send Levi a photograph of him, which rekindled their conversations at least... They tried to co-parent, but that wore off after a few years when Melanie decided she’d have better opportunities in the city.

Levi begged for an address to write to, and promised to send money. Knowing she’d need financial assistance to raise Elijah-- Melanie agreed.

And so, over the course of Elijah’s lifetime, Levi would write to Melanie at least once a week, and would send money in most of them. Of course: Melanie knew the amount of money he’d sent was plenty out of means of a simple farmer... but she needed the cash and Elijah wanted to be a lawyer.. so she accepted the funds and turned a blind eye. 

Well, as blind of one as she could. Unfortunately, she saw Levi most every time she had to look Elijah in the face: and though she loved her son more than anything... it pained her to see him: so she bleached his hair when he was young, and made him wear thick-rimmed glasses... a sorry attempt to disguise his father’s features.

Meanwhile, with Melanie and Elijah out in The Big City-- Levi met Caroline & Daniel’s mother, Lilly, and fell in love. She’d always loved the simple lifestyle: grew up on a farm herself, so she fit in just perfect with Levi’s ‘honest living’, and was very content with the budget such employment would leave them with. They were absolutely, undeniably in love, and supported each other damn near blindly: Lilly knew there had to be a reason Levi would go visit all the shopkeepers in town while wearing his suits, she knew the men who’d come around asking for him couldn’t possibly be his family in the typical sense, and she knew there had to be deals going on under tables in order for the Preacher Men to shiver when they shook Levi’s hand at church...

It was when she fell pregnant with Daniel that ignorance stopped being bliss, and she asked to know only the necessities: Levi told her he had business with other men in town, and he revealed the existence of Elijah and Melanie. Lilly insisted he continue to do whatever would be needed for his son, but he made it clear Melanie did not want the families to intertwine. Despite her disapproval, Lilly never argued, and only asked that he make sure their own family is financially stable enough.

He never backed down on the promise-- though their budget was meager in most aspects, it was plenty for the two of them, and Lilly never wanted the big house or fancy cars.

They had Daniel, and years later, darling Caroline came along.

Caroline was sickly most of her young life-- doctors couldn’t quite place the WHY or WHAT; but she survived, despite the illness stunting her growth. Papa (Levi) poured money into taking her to different doctors, and donating as tithes in hopes God could help them where Man failed... He’s not quite sure who deserves the credit for his just-past-five-foot bundle of joy, but she survived and remained the light of his life. He’d bring her along to meetings with his FRIENDS, and she’d sit up sweet and pretty with a smile, but they’d give her quarters for getting candy sticks before business was ever discussed.

Daniel was never one for school-- but the boy was built like a brick house. He grew up trailing behind Papa and learning different trades, mostly construction and the general necessities for keeping up the farm. He’d met them gentlemen too, but mostly preferred to stay behind and take care of the crops or animals: he felt lesser than them, with his dirty cheeks and fingernails while they wore ties and nice shoes... wasn’t really comfortable being around them, felt like they were UP to something...

Levi had intended on leaving the homestead and his side business in Daniel’s care when he retired: but knew the boy would need to finish schooling first. Unfortunately for the lot of them... they never quite got that far.

Papa fell ill, fast. Stomach problems, mostly. Ceased to be able to keep on weight or keep much food down- doctors couldn’t place the cause... Mama took on as much as she could, believing they needed more money in order to properly maintain their homestead.  Daniel dropped out of school, gladly, to take on the responsibility of the only moneymaker he knew-- the barn, the crops, the animals, and general handiwork for extra cash. Caroline stayed in school only because her father insisted; but during those formative social years of school dances and teenagers fumbling with each other in fast cars... she’d come straight home to take care of Papa, and to take over the domestic duties so Mama and Daniel wouldn’t have to worry about cooking or cleaning. The gentlemen stopped coming around... conveniently...

Levi’s death devastated all three of them. A few years later, Lilly was buried up on the hill right alongside him. Mama and Papa; together, forever.

Daniel and Caroline were left with broken hearts, and bruised hopes. All he wanted was to fulfill his father’s legacy-- despite not knowing what that was, exactly. All she wanted was to escape-- despite knowing she’d have to chop herself at the roots in order to get away from the place.

Years down the line, after the Jackson siblings pretty much accepted their lot in life: Elijah’s mother fell ill and she gave him Levi’s letters on her death bed, along with all the extra money she hadn’t yet given him. He used only what was necessary, and had also received a hefty inheritance upon her leaving the world, to finish his schooling. With some connections through Professors, he even landed a great job at a prestigious law firm.

But it felt cheap, despite the sky-rise or the floor-to-ceiling windows. He needed more, than the good job and abundance of funds, and decided to leave it all behind in order to go look for the man who’d penned all those letters to his mother...

Unfortunately, he was too late. Papa was already long gone, and when he knocked on the door of that dilapidated homestead: it was little bitty Caroline who answered the door and nearly had a heart attack at the sight of him.

He looked exactly like Levi, to the most minute details, and she knew before he even cleared up the confusion-- he had to be a GHOST or BLOOD... but he was more than willing to dismiss the terror on her face when he felt how she actually looked at him for what felt like the first time in his life...

Which is where we are now...

With Daniel, loathing the thought of an elder brother, who wears his fancy clothes in his nice corner office, while he works by the sweat of his brow just to take care of himself and his sister.

WHERE DID ALL THE MONEY COME FROM!? WHERE DID IT GO!? WHY WAS IT MAILED TO ELIJAH INSTEAD OF SAVED FOR A NEST EGG THEY COULD HAVE DESPERATELY USED!?

With Caroline, both excited over the prospect of learning all about this city-slicker’s life, and delighted over having a piece of her father back that she didn’t know existed.

WHAT WAS UNIVERSITY LIKE!? WHAT WAS THE CITY LIKE, AND THE PEOPLE THERE?! WHY DID IT TAKE SO LONG FOR THEIR PATHS TO ALL PROPERLY CROSS!?

With Elijah, heartbroken over discovering he’s truly an orphan, but desperate to keep a hold on the only shreds of family he’s found actually exist.

WHAT WAS IT LIKE GROWING UP WITH SIBLINGS INSTEAD OF ALONE!? WHAT WAS LEVI, PAPA! LIKE!? WHAT WAS HAVING A FATHER LIKE!? HOW DID LEVI MANAGE TO SEND HIM SO MUCH MONEY WHILE THE REST OF THE FAMILY SUFFERED!?

... and, most notably, who were those gentlemen Elijah had met in town who wanted to steal peeks at the letters he’d hardly mentioned when asking for directions to the return address...?

[a-gal-with-taste]

Out of Time (Drabble)

Summary: The seemingly never-ending torture of having you in this existance, his soulmate, wasn't the fact that he had to wait for destiny to allow for the two of you to unite; it was the fact that he now had to wait on you.

A/N: Giving zero-fucks and posting a practice-drabble I've written between edits for my Timer series. Timer is a doozy, and it's gonna be a big-ride, but sometimes I just wanna sit down and play with my slow-burn enemies(?)-to-lover soulmates outside of their main storyline.

With that in mind, enjoy a largely contextless-drabble in the Timer Universe!

Warnings: SFW, power-dynamics, complex relationships, soulmate/soultimer AU, enemies-to-lovers, unresolved tension, background Zaunite politics, Silco thirsting and being cockblocked by his own soulmate, large time-skip in main Timer-universe.

Timer Prologue | AO3

"You are losing my interest," He muttered, eye narrowing while the other glowed. "And that can be a very dangerous thing." The only response he gets is a laugh, short and light.

"All I've ever had is your interest," You teased, but it's layered beneath indifference, and nonchalance. The same tone is in your eyes, which don't drop from his, even as you tilt your chin down. The wine swirls in your glass, reflecting your face in vinaceous. "We both know it. I could imagine it'd be refreshing to not be your obsession for a few minutes."

It's his turn to laugh, but Silco can only manage a snort. "I am not-"

"It's alright, it's flattering more than anything." You bring the red to your lips, slipping your eyes closed. Gracefully, you tip your headback instead of bringing the glass even closer to your face, and the view gives Silco a completely look at the expanse of your throat, which shifts slowly with the movement of your smooth swallow.

His own throat feels parched at the sight.

But reaching for a glass would be coinciding, and showing defeat in either words, or actions is not acceptable, not with you.

You part your lips audibly after draining your glass, still not yet used to the rich flavor, but you elegantly return it to the serving tray on the edge of his desk. "Flattering, but a bit presumptuous. You haven't even asked me out for dinner yet." "Because I don't want to," Silco replies, again shortly.

"Right," You say with a smile, and lie just as easily, if not as subtly, as the Eye does. "And you don't interest me. Have you ever thought about how dangerous that could be?" Silco feels just jaw tick with the clench of his teeth. It's difficult, really, to not tell you how that scares him to death every day. That one day, you'll grow bored. One day, you'll leave, and not return.

That one day, you'll return to the Alcoves, and never step foot in Undercity again.

And just like that, he's lost his soulmate.

Were you any other Zaunite, he could pull strings to keep you around, keep you Underground. And you know it, which is why you stand from your chair so casually, not waiting for his leave or permission to conclude this meeting.

Because, you are a queen in your own right. The only hold Silco truly has on you, is his ticking numbers on your wrist, while your hold over him only encapsulates ever further with every meeting. Even now, he feels it tighten around him when you smile, seemingly kind, but he sees that taunt behind the teeth.

"I think we both know, Silco, that we have our attention on one another. And it's not a fact that's going to change."

"Perhaps. That doesn't change the fact that if I am not losing interest, i'm losing paitence." An equally dangerous thing, he thought, but you were unphased.

You shrugged, noncommittal. "Tragic. We waited most of our lifetime though, surely you can wait another week until I get that report for you." A pause than, carefully innocently, "Or perhaps it will be longer until our next meeting. There is some business Topside I need to handle on my end... surely you understand, you aren't exactly my priority."

Leaning back in his chair, hands folded atop one another, he scowled at you. At your gall, of both existing and smiling like there's not a damn thing wrong with the image. The image of him having to wait on you for the next move. "Sometimes," He ponders aloud. "I think I liked you better, as just a set of numbers on my wrist."

His soulmate only laughs, and you smirk when you meet his eyes.

"I love that you think I can believe that."

You dip your chin at him, a nod of mutual respect between figureheads, before you turn on your heel. Nails bite into his hand as he watches you walk - he should be able to stop you. Should be able to order your return, to demand your attention, and, perhaps, ask you to stay...

But you're as powerful, as regal as he is, and even on his own territory, Silco is powerless to stop you from walking out the door.

Fist hits his desktop after a moment, his untouched glass and your empty one clinking together at the edge with his snarled curse. Frustration has never been new for him, especially not when it comes to the presence of his soulmate. Frustration of years and years, waiting, was something he grew used to as numbers counted down to the moment fate would allow your paths to cross.

Foolishly, he'd believed his frustration would cease upon meeting you. Upon your clocks reaching zero, and you would be united as one, and there would be no more frustration in terms of he and his other-half.

But you had a habit of only making his ire at waiting grow, and spiteful, he yanks at his sleeve until it pulls down, directing a mixed-glared down at numbers, stopped in their time:

000021.090923

Twenty-one days, and a little over nine hours.

That's the total amount of time Silco had ever been in the presence of his other-half, and with a withering sigh, he knew that even if that number grew, it would never, ever be enough for him.

Silco wouldn't lose interest though. Couldn't. Even with the wait, as asinine and grating as it was, as you were, he couldn't get you out of his mind. Perhaps it was only desperation, but Silco hoped that you were unable to get him out of your own as well. If only for the two of you to feel equal in yet another way, not just in soul and in positions of power, but in the fact that thoughts often felt wholly consumed of one another.

Which was exactly what infuriated him. That one person, could capture his attention and his want so wholly, and smile as if it were nothing. Smile, because even though you could surely see how you consumed him so, you enjoyed riling him up in such a way - to skip into his life, before becoming fleeting and just out of reach, but close enough to for him to hear your chuckles and see your smirks, as you always passed him, just out of reach.

His soulmate.

Taunting him.

The seemingly never-ending torture of having you in this existance, his soulmate, wasn't the fact that he had to wait for destiny to allow for the two of you to unite; it was the fact that he now had to wait on you. And you both knew it.

And, with the memory of your farewell-smirk clear in his mind, Silco finally shoved his sleeve back over his timer, and reached for his untouched glass. Because he knew, you were more than happy to make him wait as long for as you wanted, and far past the limits of his patience.

Silco took a deep, long swing of his wine, at the realization that he despised you, and adored you for it.

-

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