#zag when the muse who does not give a damn about fuckall won't speak to him Why is this so Hard >:1
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The speed in which he has to turn his amusement into faux-apology cannot be understated; though the way in which the young manās reactions serve only to further bring him closer to something like elation cannot be, either! Perhaps itās merely his age, but from their severity to their depths, he finds that his baser urges to toy with those lesser than himself are growing. They are, of course, overwhelmingly easy to keep at bayāhe has practiced, he has lived, too long to be any other wayābut the fact that he has to acknowledge them at all on his own is exceedingly rare.
Not that he is one to ignore his own whims, either, however.
āSo many apologies you need not make; truly, just what kind of butler am I?ā Another melodramatic sigh, another shake of his head, follows in the wake of his own bastard-conceived plot and results. āThough I must apologize once more, myself, for inadvertently insulting your acquaintances.ā For if they are neither friends nor anyone he considers worthy of such a word... I meant no harm, of course, but I fear I spoke too impulsively. Such is a failing of my own, unfortunatelyāI must admit that I do take heart in knowing you bear confidence-enough to correct me, however.ā
For that, too, was amusing in and of itselfādespite the irresolute clamber in which young Daisuke speaks his words, the fact that he speaks them at all is enough to make him want to chuckle. Companionship was of no use to himself, but the lengths in which those who find it so go to have others speak no ill-will of them, even when it was unsure, served to interestingly confuse him always.
āIt is quite clear that they are of great import to you,ā he continues on easily, however, belying his thoughts, āin spite of how little you know of them personally. Does not speaking of them in such a way also speak in turn, however, not just to their skills but to what skills they have imparted to you, as well?ā
Even if mere beginner-work from another teenager, knowledge would forever be knowledge; āTo gain any sort of understanding over the simplest of details is enough to learn the complex natures of this world, after all. One might argue that this is needed to do so, as what one might think of as a basisāthough I dare not do so in my position, of course.ā
(His position for the moment, at least, but there was little need to fret over frivolous details such as those, right then. He merely needs them known, still.)
āSpecial qualities or lack thereof aside, as wellāand so long as I am permitted to say soāat the very least I find that your art is of quite the noticeable talent already.ā
And there he goes to demonstrateāflipping through pages quickly, though keeping a thumb on the one he had scribbled on himself, with that self-satisfied smile! He doesnāt go far, and he isnāt even looking at it, but even this serves more to try for a reaction than anything else!
āIt is clear that you donāt lack an eye for details,ā he speaks as the pages turn, as casually as if he were discussing the weather, āand neither is there lack of intent behind your work! Really, this is more than enough to warrant an impart of your knowledge to myself, as the less-experienced artist, but I suppose...ā
Just as quickly as heād begun flipping through pages does he close them back up, keeping only the one heād utilized himself open for the bookās owner to see. In the same breath, he holds it back out for the young man; silent encouragement that he is to, finally, take his own look at what Sebastian had done.
āRelieving as it is to hear that my work shanāt be considered by one who is, at heart, really meanā, I do urge you to give your most honest opinion. Shall my skills be lacking, I will endeavour to improve as quickly as I am able to do.ā
Though he can already guess a few ways this is about to goābut heās curious to see which of them will occur, so thereās no need to continue stalling.
' i-infamy ?! '
the word seems to instantly jolt him . close to hives , his skin prickling , every thin hair on his arm swift to stand up straight on end . a word like infamy ... was really bad , wasn't it ?! ( like horrible , like heinuous , like --- dark . )
' n-no ! it's not like that or anything ! like hiwatari-kun and sagami-sensei , i mean --- er , u-um ... ' would someone like sebastian have been able to recognize any of these names ? arrive , vanish , do everything in a blink and leave nary so much as a single trace behind --- his family had instructed him over and over to be capable of severing any sort of loose strings in the midst of plotted , robbing act .
( why dare to admire his enemies , anyways ? )
was it too simple , too laughable , that just because he wanted to think they were friends ... no , that because he just wanted to somehow be friends them , that he should have therefore made every effort to be kind , and speak up in their defense ? even knowing that they might never have done the same for him , or for his far more rotten , wretched parts .
' t-they're not that bad , i mean ... i don't think infamous is a good word for them ... ' though , maybe and maybe not . before the hikari alone , what other artists played god , to the extent that their creations came to life out of nothing but the meager likes of stone , paint and wax ? man's first golems and homonculi , created in the perverse shape of themselves : both infinitely beautiful and hideous .
their broach of every natural law and order could have lent itself to their infamy , if only what vicious storms of emotion surrounding their works didn't coil about them like the still , untouchable calm of an eye of a storm . and there , braving the cuts and razor , racing edge of the roughest winds , was the black half of the kokuyoku ... what black wings even now remained bound to his body .
' ... i'm sorry . ' trailing away , clutching to himself at his hands , daisuke's will shrinks and relents , wilting meekly beneath the other's blase accusations . certainly , he feels every invisible pressure like a block of lead , hitching his shoulders high in a hopeless defense against what felt like , polite and composed as it was , an adult's chide .
' i don't ... actually know if i'm really friends with any of them . i only sort of know them , so i didn't think anything was that interesting to talk about --- um , hiwatari-kun is the same age as me , and he's the one who comes from a really family . the hikari ? their artworks always end up in museums and stuff , they've been making masterpieces for over four hundred years . i've only really learned a few things about ... um , shadows and circles from him , though ... '
embarrassing basics that anyone , even a toddler should have been able to comprehend .
' sagami-sensei was a sculptor , and someone who won top prizes every year in azumano ... our standards for art are the highest in japan , so it was a big deal when he was going to start teaching part-time . but then he quit right after his practice internship and decided to go back to art --- ' cheeks flush and he laughs ; he doesn't dare to pry at sebastian's turn , deeply curious as he remained to the other's work . ' he was really cool . he always seemed to know what he was doing when he was making art , hiwatari-kun too , i think . i'm not really anything special , especially compared to them ... '
humility blends in warmly with a loitering sense of shame .
' really --- really-really , i don't think i could give you good advice or critiques even if i tried . not to mention , since i was the one who asked you to draw something for me in the first place , if i were to suddenly get all nit-picky or something over it when i probably couldn't do any better , i'd feel ... um , really mean . '
#WAAAAAAAH TSUN ZAG'S SO SORRY HE KEPT PROMISING 2 COME OVER HERE AND THEN HE NEVER DID AUGH.....#SAKURA BRAIN IS ON TOO MUCH . I LOVE MY GIRL SM BUT ALSKDMASL#āi am simply one hell of a butlerā : ic#dnangelic#he's making me wring him out like a towel to even talk this is a nightmare but we make do . we make do........#i really wanted him to say more abt hiwatari and sagami but ughhh it's not coming to me#zag when the muse who does not give a damn about fuckall won't speak to him Why is this so Hard >:1#but anyhow ; some of this is still him just kinda doing his smooth-talk thing but some of it is also like . real#iirc we talked about it but im too sleepy to really remember it all.....#i really need 2 do that manga re-read though hooooly fuck . but anywayz enough abt zag lemme get 2 the tags ;#DARK PLEASKDLAMEMKLSFD HE'S JUST . HE'S LIKE THAT . APATHETIC CREATURE WHO OVERUSES DRAMA FOR HIS OWN#ANNOYING FUCKIN' WANTS LIKE BROOOOO GO FIND A HOBBY !!!!! he sighs a lot yet i have no icons of it though..... a travesty of#the greatest degree tbh#dai's scrambling ''i can't use this šØ'' to sebby's :) ''fear not you surely can'' . and then he's just putting it in dai's hands anywayz--#but EXCUSE YOU HE DOESNT āāāāāā WANNA EAT DARK'S MINI GNOME GIRLBOSS !!!! HE JUST WANTS 2 PLAY AROUND#THAT'S VERY DIFFERENT !!!!! HE EATS ONLY ONE MEAL AT A TIME !!!!!!!!!! HE HAS /MANNERS/ >:1 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!#( I WANT HIM DEAD SO BAD . I MEAN SEBBY HERE I ASLKMFDSLD )#but for once zag did not forget that but it's gonna sideswipe sebby enough that even the others wont be able to like#get mentioned capturing wiz . pov wiz is out there running around like dark or dai and while sebby has the real one up on the upper floors#somewhere theres explosion noises and shotgun shots going off and dozens of things breaking as finny bard and mey-rin try to#kill wiz ( nobody who enters the manor with the intent to take anything gets out alive . or at least not intact )#so like . wiz u need 2 run okay u need 2 get outta this freak-ass place !!!!#HOPEFULLY SEBBY AND ZAG ARE STILL . UNDERSTANDING THE THEMES THOUGH#THE NEXT TIME HOPEFULLY ZAG IS NOT SO BLEH WITH HIM THAT HE CAN ACTUALLY . PROCESS WORDS AND WRITE THEM--#sorry he does go through the sketchbook though he is . he is that brand of annoying fr#hes literally not even looking at it . just pushing pages 2 get dai 2 react . i reiterate how annoying he is by god
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