#yujing liu

[dorkyfries]

thought i'd try posting something on tumblr for once, here is my rogue yujing, my paladin annette, and my cleric eva ✌️

[nuttytani]

Celestia's Cruel Thesis

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Pairing: Tartaglia | Childe x Zhongli

Premise: Childe gets isekai'd to a Liyue where Rex Lapis still rules over it.

chapter 2 link

You can also read this fic on ao3 here

Chapter 3: May the odds be ever in your favour

“Dear Milleliths, you might have the wrong person,” Master Liu Siu speaks up at last and tries to walk closer to where Childe was. 

He is blocked by the Millelith that crowded around the redhead and gets a polite warning instead. “We indeed have the right person. Please don’t be fooled by this innocent looking man, Liu Siu Xiansheng,” the commander of the group says as he gives a nasty glare towards Childe. 

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about. I have never used counterfeit mora in my life,” Childe counters, feeling confused about this predicament he is currently in. 

The commander looks as if he wants to roll his eyes but refrains himself and continues to speak, “Further discussions regarding this matter will be after we take you to Jade Chamber. Stop resisting, and perhaps you might receive a lighter punishment for your blasphemy.” 

A handful of the teahouse patrons start their murmuring. It’s not loud, but enough to make out what they’re saying. 

“Tsk tsk tsk… See, this is why we should never trust a qigai.” 

“What do you mean by qigai? He doesn’t behave like one. I’m sure you meant to say Snezhnayan. Aiyah…Sometimes I wonder why Dijun and the Qixing let them all trade in the harbour.”

“Hush now! Don’t be rude. It’s the Fatui who are trouble.”

“And? Most Fatui are Snezhnayans.” 

“Oh...I thought the boy was from Fontaine, blue eyes and all.”

“Pshhh… I heard the boy talk distinctly in Snezhnayan a few times to himself. I’m not that old to be deaf.”

 So they’ve already begun to gossip, huh. 

There was no way out of this. The gods must truly hate him. Not only did he get fooled in Liyue, arrive in a strange Liyue, and get called names by the locals, but also got accused of creating counterfeit mora. Well, the gods hated him, since the instant he was born. How could he forget about falling into the abyss at the shy age of 14? Which entirely changed the trajectory of his life. 

Childe pauses his self-deprecating thoughts, with a resigned sigh, he holds his hands out, and the Milleliths in charge quickly handcuff him. Meanwhile, Sir Fan Er’ye and Master Liu Siu observed the entire scene play with an unfamiliar look in their eyes. Surely, it must be disgust. He couldn’t tell– with the way the two were frowning so hard.  

With arrogance, one of the younger Milleliths harrumphs, and tips his head upwards, “Let us leave.” He then pointedly scrutinises Childe and resumes his spiel, "Don't think about escaping! It’s nearly impossible to. Those handcuffs are made specially by Liuyun Jiefeng Zhenzhun.” 

I wasn’t even going to escape, you doofus. How annoying.    

“Yes, yes…. Tie me up, bind me, strip me, whatever. I will not run away, lest I want the wrath of the rock,” he says in an annoyed voice. Speaking with these haughty Milleliths and nobles rubbed him in all the wrong ways. 

The Millelith however looks back at him with scorn, it seems like he said something wrong because the soldier replies with seething venom, “How dare you carelessly speak of his imperial majesty like that! Another word and I might as well chop that tongue off!”

“Youxu– that’s enough. There will be consequences if you act without orders,” the commander cautions the younger. 

“But Ge… I mean… Seargent Fengyan, this lunatic needs to be disciplined!” the one named Youxu says in earnest. 

“Indeed, however, we are unqualified to issue such punishments.” He reprimands Youxu, before facing his team. “Soldiers, make haste. It will be sundown by the time we make it to Yujing Terrace,” Sergeant Fengyan barks out loud enough for the entire teahouse to hear and there is pin drop silence. All the chattering stopped. 

Every single Millelith saluted Sergeant Fengyan and in unison, all yelled hooah.  

.

Now, that is how Childe stood, in front of the three Qixing ladies. His hands were still bound by the handcuffs and the Milleliths had blocked his every movement with their spears all around him. They were on guard twice as much. It appeared that his his last encounter with the soldiers in Yiyan Temple was not forgotten. 

If it weren’t for the strange Adepti handcuffs on his wrists, he would have escaped this place in record time. Except then he’d be 1) fugitive with a bounty on top of his head for apparently using counterfeit mora 2) his imperial majesty, the almighty Yanwang Dijun and his Adepti friends would capture him in a second. So frankly, there’s no point in running away. He just hopes this is all some strange misunderstanding because he has never used fake mora, ever. 

“You foreigner, named Childe, speak at once, about how you got hold of counterfeit mora.” Tianquan, Lady Ningguang, looked down at him, from the stage she stood, alongside Yuheng and Secretary Ganyu. Her gaze was sharp, her bright umber eyes stared deep into him, examining.  

Someone from the Milleliths surrounding him whispered amongst themselves, “I thought it was child– as in haizi.” 

“Tsk tsk, Yong’an-Ge… It is Childe, as in young nobleman,” the other Millelith responded in a hushed tone.

“Oh… Isn’t he a qigai? You know…The clothes and all.” 

“That’s the confusing part, is he trying to play the game of opposi–”

“Please, remain silent. We wish to hear what the convict has to say,” Keqing ordered, especially at the chattering pair. The hall indeed becomes completely quiet, save for the constant breathing of all and the heavy atmosphere lingering in the air. 

Childe cleared his throat and brought the attention of everyone in the Jade Chamber hall, to himself. Ah– he is unsure about what to say. It’s not like the Qixing would believe his words, not after their last meeting and specifically after they’re convinced that he made fake mora. 

With carefully constructing words in his head, Childe raised his voice, “Members of respected Qixing. I’m confused as to why I’m brought here in your office, in such a manner, it might be hard to believe since you all seem to have a biased opinion of me… however– I swear on my life and the Archon of love, that I have never created nor distributed counterfeit mora.” He took a deep breath and kneeled on the ground, while the Milleliths adjusted their spears around him. “All I want is to go back to my original world, and there is no reason for me to produce fake mora, especially when I require the help of your Archon to send me back home.”

As if tired of hearing him talk, Keqing heaved a loud sigh. She glanced back and forth between Lady Ningguang and Secretary Ganyu. Finally, she beckoned one of the secretary ladies, who stood on the side. 

“Baixiao, please bring the pouch over and the records please,” Secretary Ganyu addressed the shorter woman.  

“Yes, right away.” Baixiao bowed, disappeared quickly and appeared just as fast. Her hands held a huge pouch of mora and a stack of documents, she handed them over to Ganyu. 

Click-clack of Ganyu’s heels echoed in the Jade Chamber hall, as she delicately stepped down the stage and walked towards Childe. Her expression betrayed no emotions, as she opened the pouch of mora (the same pouch he gave to that perverted Lao Guai) in her hands, and proceeded to pull a coin out. 

She took a long look at it, flipping the sides over and over until she was satisfied with whatever she saw. “Baiwen, please take a note of serial number LE22300769.” 

“Yes, Secretary Ganyu.”

“This year’s minting of mora started with the letter C. The serialisation of mora with the letter L is supposed to happen 9 years from now. The letter E denotes the batch number. The serial number of the mora I have just read, which I shall repeat; LE22300769.” Ganyu closed her eyes and muttered something under her breath, before staring him down with cold and unfeeling eyes. 

“This originated from you, Mister Childe.”

That doesn’t sound good… At all. Is he doomed? An ex-harbinger put into jail for the production of counterfeit mora, how funny. Especially when the Qixing couldn't even lift a finger at him after the release of Osial. Funny indeed. He was actually doomed. 

He thought all mora was the same. Well, not exactly, but mora is mora. The ones he has or had in possession are in fact, very real and not fake. At least not in the other Liyue. Who knew using it would land him in shit? Childe thinks hysterically. Doomed from the start, he was using his precious mora pouches from day 1 in this Liyue. 

“Mister Childe? Will you still claim to not know anything?” Ningguang questioned, sweetly. 

Her words were like the final nail to his coffin, or so he felt. Would he even get a coffin? Perhaps he should have brought Hu Tao’s free 2 coffin coupon deal. Although it would be invalid in this Liyue. 

Someone snickered, finding this situation entertaining at his expense. 

Laugh at me all you want, assholes. 

“Mister Childe, if you don’t have any evidence to prove yourself to be innocent, then I’m afraid, we have no choice but to sentence you to 3 years of imprisonment, such states the law of Liyue,” Ningguang resumed speaking, while also giving the snickering fools a stern look. “I must say, these new Milleliths have no sense of dignity. Sergeant Fengyan, I believe your work is cut out for you.”

Sergeant Fengyan felt quite ashamed on behalf of his new unit. It didn’t look good for him as their leader; it painted Fengyan as an irresponsible commander. The soldiers of his unit had misbehaved multiple times in front of the Qixing today. He bowed deeply and apologised, “I will make sure to discipline them well, Lady Ningguang.” 

She simply nodded. 

Although the attention from Childe was shortly directed elsewhere, Keqing, the Yuheng, had been staring at him for quite some time. Never straying her gaze from him, observing. When he at last met her unwavering and quite uncomfortable watch, she gave him a mischievous grin.

“So, I’ve been wondering, and please indulge my genuine question, Mister Childe, how were you able to replicate mora? They feel like the real deal, the only mistake you’ve made is the serialisation of them.” Keqing quirked a brow and took a scroll out of her dress pocket, scribbling something down with her brush pen. 

Childe grimaced, he knew she wouldn’t believe him, they clearly didn’t when he tried to ‘explain’ himself mere moments ago, opting to completely ignore what he said instead. A million thoughts passed in his mind. What would he do? What should he say? What options were left? He was once again aware of how alone he was in this place, no one he could trust, no one to rely on and certainly no one to pull him out of this mess. 

Sure, he may be friendly with Granny Ping, Master Liu Siu and some other elderly people who were kind to him, but do they truly care for him? For Liyuens in this world, he’s nothing but a sorry looking miserable qigai and now a criminal. For all he knows, the elderlies might have felt pity about his circumstances and wanted to be generous to score some moral points. Plus, it’s not like the people back in the other Liyue liked him. 

He breathes in.

He breathes out. 

Grounding his emotions right now is the most important task at the moment. If there’s one thing he learned from Master Skirk, is that nothing can be done with a tangled heart. Childe, with much hesitation, opens his mouth but the words are stuck in his throat. He has nothing to say nor any evidence to prove his innocence. 

“Mister Childe? You don’t have to tell me, we will eventually find out ourselves. The Qixing is capable enough for that, so there’s no need for the magician to reveal their secrets,” she mocked, with her self-assured grin. 

There was an abrupt murmur. All the Millelith stood at attention. The golden door to the Jade Chamber hall opened up. The pair of guards by the door clacked their spears against the marble flooring and stood ramrod straight before announcing in unison, “His Imperial Majesty, Yanwang Dijun, arrives!”

“Pay your respects to Dijun.”

The heavy ornate door flung open, as the Archon made his entry. Every single person bowed and recited, “Thousands of blessings to our lord!” 

Yanwang Dijun, in plain words, looked stunning. He was dressed to the nines, as usual. He wore beige coloured robes with golden iridescent embroidery on the cloth; they were scale like patterns– Childe concluded after a proper look. His silky hair was in a loose braid today, tied at the end with a yellow ribbon. In his hand, he held a foldable fan. A dainty little thing, a white background that had multiple blue glaze lilies painted. 

Childe could only stare at him with a dumbfounded expression. Not even bothering to rise from his kneeling position. Not for long, though. The Millelith who stood next to him must have witnessed his less than respectful stare. The soldier grabbed him by the arm, yanked him up to his feet and pushed on Childe’s back to make him forcefully bow.  

This was like deja vu. He swore something like this happened before. 

Dijun’s amber eyes briefly looked at every person, before eventually stopping at the young man with copper hair. It lingered there for a moment before he finally cleared his throat.

“Rise.” Yanwang Dijun’s voice reverberated in the hall.

All stood straight once more, and the soldier let go of Childe’s back. 

“Pray tell, what is going on here?” Dijun asked quizzically while fanning himself. His people were stunned at their Archon’s arrival, they did not imagine he would show up at the Jade Chamber, not at this hour. Besides, he rarely ever visited the Jade Chamber, unless the Qixing required his help. Dijun mostly spent his time in Yiyan Temple, busy with his own set of responsibilities. 

Everyone stood in silence for a minute or two. That is until Ningguang broke the awkward air by finally speaking, “Greetings, my lord. As you can see, we’re all fulfilling our duties as the Qixing. Rest assured.” 

“Qixing duties that include accusing innocent foreigners,” Childe muttered softly. He could hardly hold himself back from rolling his eyes. Though at the moment he had no proof or evidence to prove his innocence, it didn’t change the fact that he didn’t commit any crime. Well… no crimes in this Liyue, yet. 

Unknown to Childe, Yanwang Dijun heard him mumble, every single word. Possibly thanks to his extraordinary hearing from being an Adeptus. He snapped his white fan closed and slowly stepped towards Childe. 

“Innocent foreigner, you say?” Dijun placed his fan underneath Childe’s chin and tipped his face to meet the god’s gaze. Golden slitted eyes stared deep into his own, seeking something. Seeking what? Childe did not know. But he felt a wave of goosebumps rise on his skin from the sudden act. He was caught off guard, and that wasn’t good. It meant his mask of calm had slipped. 

“Hmm? Tell me. Do you consider yourself to be innocent?” Dijun questioned again.

Childe was silent as he pondered. Would answering the question make the man step away and give him some personal space? Would it make his fake mora predicament better? He doubted, but even so, it was worth a shot.

“Yes,” he replied with furrowed brows. 

Dijun kept staring into his eyes, unblinking. Eventually, the fan under his chin lifted away and with a sunny smile, the Archon moved away at last, turning his back. The fan in his hands snapped open and Dijun sighed, “You all heard him. He’s innocent.”

At that moment, the entire Jade Chamber hall erupted in chaos. Millelith and the respected members of the Qixing were crying and shouting at poor ol’ Yanwang Dijun to rethink his choice. 

“Your majesty, he is a foreigner qigai who committed blasphemy! How can you let him off so easily?” someone from the honourable Qixing, raised their voice. 

“My lord, you know nothing of his deeds. He basically scammed the old and used his young and pretty face to get into their hearts!” one of the Milleliths yelled.

“Are you enchanted by him too, your majesty? Is that why you’re letting this… man named Childe, off the hook?” Keqing joined in. 

Baishi, who had been quiet this entire time, speaks up, “Dear Yuheng, how could you accuse our lord like that! Our esteemed lord is not one to be charmed by a pretty face,” 

“I agree!” The other two Tianquan secretaries; Baiwen and Baixiao, also jumped onto the bandwagon. 

Amidst the chaos of constant arguing and protests between the members of Qixing and the Millelith, Yanwang Dijun stood in the middle, looking slightly amused. The corner of his lips had a slight curl. For some reason, he seemed to find the state of his government humorous. 

Childe did not find this funny at all. Not a single bit. He wanted to pry open the Archon’s head to know what was going on inside that head. Was he off the rockers? Did he take something? His entire government was fighting and the old man wasn't even doing anything? Even the ever quiet Ganyu was taking part in this. 

At last, Dijun seemed to have enough kick from the crisis. He raised his hand halfway, motioning all to keep quiet. 

“Now, I do find all of your theories and assumptions to be interesting, to say the least.” Dijun smiled in such a way that his eyes crinkled around the corners and formed crescents. He continued, “Even so, this is getting out of hand. Please refrain yourselves, you are all members of the Qixing and Millelith… Maintain some semblance of professionalism.” 

The entire crowd looked like children who were scolded by parents. Shuffling their feet and unable to face their lord. They all kept their heads down in embarrassment. Baiwen, on the other hand, seemed to be looking serious by the second as she whispered into Lady Ningguang’s ear. As if agreeing, Ningguang nodded with a severe look on her face. She glanced towards Childe, with a distrust.

He wondered what she was plotting; it was difficult to tell. This entire scene felt like a part of a comedy from the theatre plays back in Snezhnaya and he held himself back from laughing his head off, which was becoming tough as each moment passed. Except, he was the source of comedy, the clown, and that wasn’t something to laugh at. 

“I beg your forgiveness, on behalf of the members of Qixing and Millelith, my lord. We’re all expressing genuine concern, as you do not know the severity of the crimes, Mister Childe, has committed,” said Ningguang, as she motioned for Ganyu to pass over the documents to Dijun; to which, he received with a thanks and proceeded to look over them with a cursory glance. 

“Mister Childe has produced and distributed counterfeit mora in huge amounts. We found out after a thorough investigation, that the employees of Bubu Pharmacy received a suspicious amount of mora from one of their customers. Out of the blue too, I might add,” Ningguang carried on. 

To which, Dijun responded with a soft chuckle, “I am well aware, Lady Ningguang.”

“I believe you do not. Ganyu, please bring in the pouch of mora,” she ordered. Not a minute too late, Ganyu arrived with the pouch of mora. Once again, Ganyu presented it to Dijun. He didn’t even bother to take it. 

“Please, I implore you to check them, my lord.”

“Hmm…But I can already tell that these mora coins are not fake, Lady Ningguang. The geo energy within the pouch of mora you have shown me is undoubtedly the same as any other mora coin in the Golden House–”

Keqing frowned and opened her mouth, “But–”

Dijun raised his hand halfway. “Let me continue. I know of your concerns. I am well aware that the serial codes on these mora coins do not match with what we have available amongst the common folk, also the fact that these should have been distributed at least 9 years later,” he paused, and gave a short look at Childe. “However, this does not mean that the mora Mister Childe has distributed is fake. It’s very real. Now we may all be wondering, then why is it that the codes differ so much?”

The emperor positively glowed when he said, “Simple! The mora he has used is not from this world.”

“Your majesty, that is absurd! Do you really believe the words of a nobody?” It seems Keqing had enough of Yanwang Dijun’s speech and couldn’t help but intervene at last. 

“Ah yes, a nobody indeed. Don’t you find it strange that there is no record of a person named ‘Childe’? After our brief encounter with him in the temple, I contacted Devi Kusanali. She confirmed that there is no one such as Childe nor Tartaglia in Teyvat.” The god hands the documents and the pouch over to Ganyu and steps closer towards where Childe stood. “No record of him in the world tree at all, which is impossible. His claims about being from another world are true. It explains why his ‘mora’ feels real yet the codes are different.” 

The entire hall stares with uncertainty at Childe. They couldn’t believe their ears. Even their lord confirmed that this so-called qigai, was in fact from another world, how could it be? 

“Now, now. No need to be surprised. First, let us release Mister Childe from his handcuffs.” Dijun calls for one of the younger Milleliths, named Yong’an, who held the keys. 

Childe felt his body tense as the god strode towards him, a bit too close for comfort. Childe could smell the mild scent of silk flowers wafting from his robes, as he slipped the key into the hole of the cuffs and twisted it back and forth. The key made squeaky noises while the god struggled to unlock the handcuffs. 

The key made a weird click sound, and the esteemed Yanwang Dijun paused in his ministrations. Blinking slowly at the handcuffs. 

Dijun peeked from beneath his eyelashes and smiled apologetically. “Ah. It seems the key is stuck.” 

“What?” asked Childe, feeling wary.

“The key which unlocks your handcuffs. It is stuck,” the esteemed Yanwang Dijun repeated himself. 

All the officials and soldiers wanted to laugh, but they resisted the temptation. Biting on their lips to keep their giggles in. But a few of them couldn’t help but snort like pigs at how things were progressing. Childe too, wanted to join in and laugh hysterically. Not at Dijun, not at himself, but at his luck. His terrible luck. 

“I heard you fine the first time,” he replied. “Are you doing this on purpose?”

Youxu, the young Millelith harshly pointed at Childe in anger. “How dare you accuse our lord like that! Apologise immediately, you–”

“Youxu-Ge, please… Calm down!” Yong’an covered his friend’s mouth, as Sergeant Fengyan glared at the two. They were given a final warning by the Sergeant, and if they didn't behave themselves, the two would be escorted out and be barred from joining in cases for a month. The two young Milleliths immediately paled and profusely apologised and bowed multiple times. The rest of the soldiers were also given a warning, and all seemed pretty mortified for their actions.

“My apologies, Mister Childe… Please, hold still for a moment.” Dijun grabs Childe’s hands to extend the arms out. He placed his palm, in a spearhand position, between the handcuffs and swiftly struck it. The cuffs split in half and fell with a clang onto the marble floor. 

Lady Keqing was not impressed as she folded her arms. “You’d have to replace that, my lord.” 

“Of course, I shall ask Liuyun Jiefeng Zhenjun to provide you with another.” He then shifted to face Childe. “Well then! You are free to go, but before that, I would like to apologise to you for the disrespect.”

Childe tilted his head and pinched his chin as if contemplating, before he immediately replied, “No, why should I? What will I receive in turn if I do accept your apology? Nothing– exactly. No, thank you.”

Hundreds of eyes were glaring at his back, if they stared any longer, Childe would be burnt to a crisp, like the one time Anthon left the fire on and accidentally charred the rice. Of course, his brother was scolded by Tonia, who put him in charge of making rice. She pulled him by the ear and stood next to him to watch as Anthon started to cook a new batch of rice.  

Dijun made a blank face as if he didn’t expect it, but he instantly changed it back into his polite smile. If Childe wasn’t staring so intently at the Archon, he might have missed it. 

“Well then, how about a tour of Liyue? You haven’t been long in this world, I assume. There’s a lot to see and shop in the land of commerce,” Dijun quickly regained himself and countered. His officials did not like the idea as they started to grumble and chatter again but stopped as their lord gave them an exasperated look. “What do you say?” he asked, sweetly, with that blinding smile and warm amber eyes. 

Wait– why is he even thinking like that? Childe scolds himself in his mind. 

“Fine. On one condition though,” he sighed. “You, Yanwang Dijun, the Lord of Geo, shall pay for everything.”

“It’s a contract.” Dijun looked pleased as he lightly nodded. 

.

Cicadas hummed and a pleasant summer breeze passed by. Bubu Pharmacy was quiet and serene. Most of the employees were on a lunch break. Well, most being Qiqi. Herbalist Gui had to stay behind as Dr Baizhu was away from the harbour.

Someone pushed the door, causing the wind chime next to it to ring. An old man with his walking stick slowly shuffled towards the counter.

“Oh… Guai Yeye! Welcome!” Herbalist Gui greeted the old man with a wide smile. 

“Long time no see, here again for your joints?” the youth asked, whilst placing measured doses of medicine into paper pouches and labelling them neatly with his inky brush pen.

“Good afternoon, young man, ahh yes yes. The usual please,” Lao Guai rasped. He coughed into his fist as his body shook. He looked around the pharmacy with keen eyes. Particularly at the herbal blends that had tags such as ‘great for stamina!’ or ‘no more back pain’. 

Herbalist Gui nodded at the old man and twisted to face the wooden drawers, opening a few. He flips through the paper pouches with the names of the customers who’d receive them. 

“Hmm…Not here.. Just a moment, Yeye.” The young man glanced back and promised to return soon, as he went into one of the staff-only rooms, and in a brief moment came out with a bright smile. 

“Here you go, and that will be 850 mora.” He hands the medicine over to Lao Guai. 

Lao Guai opened his mouth only to erupt in a coughing fit, once he calmed down he thanked Gui and paid him. Gui, however, looked at the old man with concern. He knew that the elderly had developed a nasty cough because of the ever changing weather recently, but instead of improving, whenever he met the old man, he seemed to get worse. 

“Would you like me to pack you some expectorants for your cough? On the house, since you’re a regular.”

“Aiyah… I’d feel too bad for that, young lad… But who am I to deny free medicine?” Lao Guai’s eyes crinkled as he chuckled heartily. “That reminds me, would you mind packing a few of those back pain and stamina blends? Maybe it’ll help me a bit, my wife’s been complaining that I’m always crying about my back and lack of energy… If you know what I mean”

Gui hummed and grabbed the blends from the display shelves. “That will be 5000 mora in total.”

Lao Guai just drops a big pouch of mora on the counter. “Take this entire thing. Recently landed jackpot, you see. Think of it as advanced payment.”

The young man quirked his brow but he kept quiet and took the heavy pouch without complaint. He had seen plenty of things in this pharmacy, and this didn't even make him bat a lash. He just hopes that this elderly hasn’t taken an interest in gambling, otherwise he will make sure to inform his wife promptly. 

He sends the man off with a wave and resumes work. Lunch break was probably over as Qiqi came back and placed her basket, filled with herbs, on the counter.  

“Did you have your lunch, Qiqi?” Gui asked while grabbing the basket from where it was placed and carrying it back into the storeroom. He came back and sighed, plopping down on the chair in front of the little girl.

“Qiqi…ate…” she replied, in a slow manner; to which she received a soft pinch on the cheek. 

“Gui is sad now– I thought we would eat lunch together,” he makes a comically sad face at her.

Now, Qiqi also frowns looking at Gui and gives him a pat on the shoulder. “Qiqi… Eat lunch with Gui… Tomorrow… Don’t cry.” 

While Herbalist Gui and Qiqi were having a sweet moment, a lady in dark blue clothing sneaked in and rummaged through the cash counter. After finding whatever she was looking for, she grabbed the heavy pouch of mora and replaced it with the one hanging on her waist. Effortlessly, she tiptoed out of the pharmacy, unnoticed. 

Author’s Notes for Chapter 3

I did not expect this chapter to be so dialogue heavy… I kind of feel that this was a bit crack and maybe a bit exaggerated? But I’m not sure. Sorry in advance if it is TT

[1] Handcuffs - With Fontaine’s release and all, I thought having proper metal handcuffs would be much better. Though I thought about the Millelith binding Childe’s arms with rope! But he’s too strong for that, so magic-strengthened metal handcuffs it is!

[2] Liuyun Jiefeng Zhenjun - Cloud Retainer’s CN name. The zhenjun part is a title, it means lord. Sorry, I won’t be using CR’s human/mortal name; Xianyun, even though it’s tempting and probably much easier, gotta keep the names consistent, since Rex Lapis goes by Yanwang Dijun. 

[3] Ge - Short for Gege which stands for elder brother / big bro. Used for family members and close friends. 

[4] Hooah - A type of greeting that soldiers use, it means everything and anything, except no. I always thought it was spelled as ‘hah’. You learn new things everyday. 

[5] three Qixing ladies - Found out that Ganyu was not actually a Liyue Qixing member, as in the bigshot members who do the important work. She is their secretary :”D omg and I’ve been playing the game for the past 2 years now… I’m disappointed in myself, not that it’s a new thing. 

[6] NPC Milleliths - They are actually in the game! Nope I didn’t make them up. The only made up characters were Luo Xiansheng and Lao Guai from the first chapter. Again, any names you’ll see in this fic are most likely in the game, unless I state otherwise in the A/N 

[7] Devi Kusanali - Nahida’s title. I hate to use the “lesser lord lord Kusanali” thing so I just went with Devi (which means goddess). 

[8] Spearhand - It looks like this.

[9] Yeye - Grandfather/grandpa 

[10] Expectorant - A type of cough medicine that loosens up the mucus in your airway and helps the secretions to come out more easily through coughs. 

[the-monkey-ruler]

Trek of Mutant 3: Dark Tide in Heaven (2017) 魔游纪3：天都暗潮

Director: Hui Yu Screenwriter: Zuo Wuming / Yang Haitao / Ding Yu / Li Congcong Starring: Lu Yujing / Yu Haorui / Yu Lei / Cui Can Country/Region of Production: Mainland China Language: Mandarin Chinese Date: 2017-04-14 (Mainland China) Duration: 60 minutes Also known as: Magic Travels / 魔游记 Type: Reimanging

Summary:

Jiang Liuer used too much power of Pangu Heart to resist Ling Xuzi's explosion, but he fell into the same danger as Ling Xuzi. The three of them took him to find the miracle doctor introduced by the owner of the museum. The miracle doctor said that two poisonous weeds are needed to cure the disease. To save Jiang Liu'er's life, everyone went deep into the mountains to search for poisonous weeds. Although it was difficult and dangerous, they recovered the herbs and saved Jiang Liu'er. Everyone returned to Tiandu to repair, but they were told that the owner of the hall was not there.

Yan and Lao Sha participated in Qingchan's martial arts competition to win Qingchan's hand in marriage but were targeted by the government. Qingchan died and Lao Sha went crazy. Yan also changed his view of ordinary people. Sanhuo and Jiang Liu mistakenly entered the space for a moment and began to doubt the owner of the hall.

Source: https://movie.douban.com/subject/27006227/

Link: N/A

[news24fr]

La population chinoise a commencé à diminuer en 2022 pour la première fois en six décennies, une étape importante pour la deuxième économie mondiale, qui fait face à une crise démographique de plus en plus grave. La Chine comptait 1,41 milliard d'habitants à la fin de l'année dernière, soit 850 000 de moins qu'à la fin de 2021, selon les données publiées mardi par le Bureau national des statistiques. Cela marque la première baisse depuis 1961, la dernière année de la Grande Famine sous l'ancien dirigeant Mao Zedong. Quelque 9,56 millions de bébés sont nés en 2022, contre 10,62 millions un an plus tôt, le niveau le plus bas depuis au moins 1950, malgré les efforts du gouvernement pour encourager les familles à avoir plus d'enfants. Au total, 10,41 millions de personnes sont mortes, une légère augmentation par rapport aux quelque 10 millions enregistrées ces dernières années. La Chine a subi une augmentation des décès liés à Covid à partir du mois dernier après avoir brusquement abandonné son approche de tolérance zéro au virus début décembre. D'autres décès liés à Covid surviendront probablement cette année, car les décès accusent généralement un retard de plusieurs semaines sur les infections et les infections continuent de se propager à travers le pays. Cette épidémie pourrait encore faire grimper le nombre de décès cette année. La baisse de la population est survenue beaucoup plus rapidement que prévu et pourrait freiner la croissance économique en ralentissant la demande de biens tels que les maisons neuves. En raison du déclin, l'économie chinoise pourrait avoir du mal à dépasser la taille des États-Unis et la nation pourrait perdre son statut de pays le plus peuplé du monde au profit de l'Inde cette année. Pas plus tard qu'en 2019, les Nations Unies prévoyaient que la population chinoise culminerait en 2031, puis diminuerait, mais l'année dernière, l'ONU avait révisé cette estimation pour voir un pic au début de 2022. La population active diminue déjà, à long terme la demande de logements va probablement encore baisser, et le gouvernement pourrait également avoir du mal à payer son système de retraite national sous-financé. Le pays suit les traces d'autres pays d'Asie de l'Est comme le Japon ou la Corée du Sud, qui ont vu leur taux de natalité chuter et leur population vieillir et commencer à diminuer à mesure qu'ils s'enrichissent et se développent. Le taux de natalité en Chine, ou le nombre de nouveau-nés pour 1 000 habitants, est tombé à 6,77 l'année dernière, le niveau le plus bas depuis au moins 1978. Les données publiées par le Bureau national des statistiques montrent que 62% de la population était en âge de travailler, ce que la Chine définit comme les personnes âgées de 16 à 59 ans, contre environ 70% il y a dix ans, soulignant les défis auxquels le pays est confronté à mesure que sa population vieillit. --Avec l'aide de Yujing Liu, Philip Glamann et James Mayger.(À l'exception du titre, cette histoire n'a pas été éditée par le personnel de NDTV et est publiée à partir d'un flux syndiqué.)

[jonathan-roxmouth]

Of all the Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals that he has performed in, the character of Che in Evita has, by far, been the hardest vocally, says Jonathan Roxmouth. The stage actor likens his latest role to running a “five-kilometre marathon”, adding that his role as Phantom in Phantom of the Opera, was like a 100-metre sprint in comparison.

“[Playing Che] is emotional, it’s angry, it’s fiery, and you can’t play it safe,” explains the 31-year-old South African singer who is in town for the Hong Kong leg of the show’s Asian tour. It will run at the Academy for Performing Arts until June 10. “You have to be commit to it and just be reckless,” he says.

“While there is no historical proof that they [Peron and Guevara] met [in real life], it’s quite interesting to have a story of revolution, challenging the norms of the government told by the guy that everybody has a T-shirt of, for those exact ideals,” says Roxmouth. -

- Evita the musical: why playing Che has been one of the most challenging roles for actor Jonathan Roxmouth by Yujing Liu

[dk-thrive]

Mount Sanqing is a renowned Taoist sacred mountain located 25 miles north of Yushan County in Jiangxi Province, China. Mount Sanqing is made up of three main summits: Yujing, Yushui and Yuhua, representing the Taoist trinity. (Liu Jie, Sipa Asia, Zuma Press, wsj.com,  December 14, 2017)

[paulbenedictblog]

%news%

New Post has been published on %http://paulbenedictsgeneralstore.com%

News SUV breaches security checkpoints near Trump’s Mar-a-Lago before being fired upon by law enforcement - The Washington Post

News

An SUV being pursued by police breached two safety checkpoints out of doorways President Trump’s Mar-a-Lago resort Friday earlier than it changed into fired on by Secret Service and native legislation enforcement officers, authorities mentioned.

Palm Sea dart County Sheriff Ric Bradshaw mentioned the incident did no longer seem like terrorism. He mentioned a girl who had been acting erratically fled from a dual carriageway patrol sergeant who tried to formulation her and then made her formulation toward the Trump property — probably no longer even vivid the set up she changed into going.

Bradshaw mentioned no one changed into damage and that the girl changed into taken into custody.

Officials identified the girl as Hannah Eileen Roemhild, 30, who had a Connecticut driver’s license and changed into staying at a local motel. Bradshaw mentioned she is anticipated to be charged with assault on a federal officer, lethal assault on two sheriff’s deputies and “excessive” traffic offenses.

The incident began right earlier than 11: 40 a.m., Bradshaw mentioned, when a Florida Highway Patrol sergeant working a safety job at a Palm Sea dart resort referred to as the Breakers changed into told of a girl acting “irrationally,” dancing on high of her SUV. The Breakers is set three miles north of Mar-a-Lago.

The sergeant approached the girl, who purchased in her automobile and then skipped over him as he tried to acquire her attention, Bradshaw mentioned. Because it seemed the girl supposed to position the SUV in pressure, Bradshaw mentioned, the sergeant smashed out her driver-aspect window and tried to seize the guidance wheel.

He changed into unsuccessful, Bradshaw mentioned, and the girl drove off. The sergeant, he mentioned, purchased in his automobile and gave dart.

The pursuit ended up on the dual carriageway leading as a lot as Mar-a-Lago, the set up the girl drove through two checkpoints on the technique to the principle entrance of the resort, authorities mentioned. After she passed the second checkpoint, Bradshaw mentioned, personnel with the Secret Service and the Palm Sea dart County Sheriff’s Establish of job opened fireplace — even supposing no one changed into struck. The girl, he mentioned, drove off, and police at final lost undercover agent of her automobile after it crossed a bridge.

Brian Swain, the special agent responsible of the Secret Service’s Miami discipline converse of job, mentioned the dwelling the set up the girl drove changed into a public roadway in Mar-a-Lago’s “outer perimeter,” no longer on Mar-a-Lago property. Bradshaw mentioned the dual carriageway “leads nowhere else nonetheless to Mar-a-Lago,” even supposing he successfully-known, “I’m no longer so determined she knew the set up she changed into going.”

“Right here's no longer a terrorist ingredient,” Bradshaw mentioned. “Right here's someone that obviously changed into impaired by some skill and is riding very recklessly and endangering no longer supreme the general public nonetheless the legislation enforcement officers which are there.”

Bradshaw mentioned that there changed into “no formulation” she would maintain reached the principle entrance of Mar-a-Lago and that she changed into no longer even “remotely discontinuance” to being ready to acquire to what officers seize into memoir the “interior perimeter.” He mentioned legislation enforcement, even supposing, on the launch did no longer know whether her automobile would possibly comprise explosives or whether she supposed to plug over pedestrians.

“We’re going to fireplace when our lives are in hazard,” he mentioned.

Trump changed into in Washington on the time of the incident nonetheless changed into anticipated to leave for Mar-a-Lago later within the afternoon. On the safety checkpoints out of doorways the membership, Secret Service brokers in most cases search cars, in overall pulling up the hood and checking for bombs or assorted weapons and illicit provides with canines. Several members relate safety has been ramped up in most modern weeks. The membership stays commence for members even when Trump is there.

Maj. Robert Chandler of the Florida Highway Patrol mentioned it changed into partly in consequence of f “public safety” that legislation enforcement lost undercover agent of the girl after the shooting. She drove at speeds as a lot as 70 mph, he mentioned, and changed into on occasion on the imperfect aspect of the dual carriageway. Authorities mentioned police at final caught as a lot as her after her automobile, which had been rented, precipitated a legislation enforcement registration quantity plate reader approach the airport.

A trooper spotted the auto and followed it to a motel, tackling the girl as she tried to hover to a room authorities later learned she had been renting, Bradshaw mentioned.

The girl sooner or later picked up any other girl — even supposing officers imagine that girl changed into no longer within the auto when it encountered legislation enforcement approach Mar-a-Lago. She has no longer been charged with any crimes, and authorities did no longer identify her. Officials mentioned on the launch that two americans were taken into custody.

George Piro, the special agent responsible of the FBI’s Miami discipline converse of job, mentioned the FBI changed into collectively investigating the topic with the Secret Service and the Palm Sea dart County Sheriff’s Establish of job, with the bureau most targeted on the “capacity assault on federal officers.” He mentioned it changed into conceivable the girl would be charged with federal crimes.

Officials mentioned they were obtaining search warrants to agree with the girl’s automobile and motel room and would soon strive to interview her.

In April, Secret Service brokers at Mar-a-Lago arrested a Chinese girl, Yujing Zhang, after she bypassed safety and acquired into the reception dwelling. The girl, who changed into later convicted of lying to a federal agent and entering restricted home, changed into carrying a thumb pressure, four telephones, a computer and a separate harddrive.

When authorities searched her hotel room later, they chanced on 9 thumb drives, five SIM cards for cellphones, about $8,000 in money and a instrument outdated to detect hidden cameras. The devices raised concerns that Zhang would possibly maintain Chinese intelligence ties, even supposing authorities did no longer label her with that.

Trump mentioned after the incident that he changed into unconcerned about capacity watch efforts directed at his membership and praised the Secret Service and the receptionist who first noticed something changed into uncommon in regards to the girl’s presence. But any other Chinese girl, Liu Jing, changed into arrested at Mar-a-Lago in December for allegedly trespassing.

Lori Rozsa in Palm Sea dart and Josh Dawsey in Washington contributed to this document.

[huttson-blog]

Popular Chinese hotpot chain sets its sights on US, to open first outlet in New York early next year — South China Morning Post

Read more at the South China Morning Post

— by Yujing Liu: Xiaolongkan was ranked as the third-largest hotpot chain in China, trailing only Haidilao and Xiabu Xiabu. New shop to open in the first quarter of 2020 in Flushing, New York…

Image courtesy of the South China Morning Post

June 16, 2019 — 10:45

[thearnoldtully]

Cockroach sushi? Inside a farming revolution that could cure cancer, compost waste – and shake up menus

Some cockroach farmers sell their insects to restaurants to be made into dishes such as cockroach sushi. Photo.

Hundreds of cockroach farmers across China are unleashing the insects’ potential in the country’s war on waste, in medicine, and deep or stir-fried

By Yujing Liu South China Posr June 2, 2018

Excerpt:

At a facility in the eastern Chinese province of Shandong, three billion cockroaches are eating 15 tonnes of kitchen waste each day to solve the long-time environmental problem of what to do with mountains of discarded food.

And as restaurants selling cockroach dishes emerge across China, envisioning a future in which a hated insect can be a solution to human food shortages is becoming a little less difficult.

Growing commercial enthusiasm for cockroaches and a more open attitude to the insects is driving more people into the market and fuelling new ideas for their use.

The number of cockroach farmers in Shandong alone has tripled to about 400 in the past three years, according to Liu Yusheng, president of Shandong Insect Industry Association and an entomology professor at Shandong Agricultural University.

“There have been huge developments in cockroach breeding and research in the past few years,” Liu said.

Read the complete article here.

from Gardening http://www.cityfarmer.info/2018/06/09/cockroach-sushi-inside-a-farming-revolution-that-could-cure-cancer-compost-waste-and-shake-up-menus/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

[nuttytani]

Celestia's Cruel Thesis

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Pairing: Tartaglia | Childe x Zhongli

Premise: Childe gets isekai'd to a Liyue where Rex Lapis still rules over it.

chapter 1 link

Chapter 2: It’s Childe not child

The Milleliths around the area made sure that Childe had completely left the premises of Yiyan Temple before they finally relaxed and stopped tracking him sneakily. There were many curious and shocked eyes on him as he walked down the stairs. He could even hear some giggles and stunned gasps. Though Childe appeared to be unaffected from being literally dragged out of the temple, he was in fact, quite angry. Sure, he was hurt as well but mostly angry. He didn’t ask to be thrown into this strange Liyue. He didn’t want to seek help from the gods nor archons, particularly not from the very archon he considered a close friend, whom he was eventually betrayed and deceived by. Childe knows it’s not the same person, yet he can’t help but feel–

“Young man, would you care for some tea?” said a warm raspy voice.

Startled to hear someone speak right behind him, Childe turned around to see a familiar face; Madame Ping. In all her grey-haired glory, warm dark eyes and her signature sweet smile. He wondered how she could sneak up on him without being noticed. Perhaps he was too deep in his thoughts. 

“You look like you could use something warm, my dear, come, sit down with me.”

Childe started, “Oh… I’m not sure if I–”

She slipped a warm teacup between Childe's hands, anyway. “My granddaughter purchased a new moli cha. It would be a waste to drink it alone, you see. And besides! It’s the perfect scenery to indulge in some hot tea and good company.”

He simply blinked at the cup between his hands. Indeed, the sky before them was breathtaking. Liyue was known for its sunsets and ruins. Plenty of tourists would line up at the docks and Yujing terrace to have a look at the so-called “golden hour moment”. As for the latter… more famous amongst historians and treasure hunters, and sometimes his fellow fatui. But, nevermind all that, he did not know that Madam Ping had a granddaughter, at least not from his intel back in the other Liyue. 

As if able to hear his thoughts, Madam Ping’s shoulders shook as she chuckled, her dark eyes glinting behind those round spectacles, “yes, I have a granddaughter. Wouldn’t it be strange not to? I’m already so old! She was but a tiny sapling few years back and now she’s all grown up. Time passes quickly, don’t you think so?”

Childe took a sip from his cup and replied, “it really does, sometimes you wish it would stop.”

“Indeed, but nothing is eternal, except for change. Even stone erodes and dissolves bit by bit, no one can stop it, not even the gods.”

Childe chugged the rest of the hot tea down his throat. “Thank you, Madame Ping, for the tea. But I’m afraid that I must take my leave now.” 

He’s got some house hunting to do, it’s been half a month, and he still sleeps on the steps of Heyu teahouse, and Master Liu Siu is gracious enough to not say anything. The man even feeds him free food day and night. It doesn’t feel great taking advantage of him like that, but unfortunately, no one dares to give him a place to rent. Not even the famous Baiju Guesthouse would allow him in, something-something looking like a low class qigai… He doesn’t even look that terrible. He looks just fine, normal. Maybe normal is weird for the people in this Liyue. Who knows, he’ll never know. 

Madame Ping placed a hand on his arm, stopping Childe.

“Dear, do you really have somewhere to be? Now, I have eyes and ears, don’t think I didn’t see you practically get thrown out of Dijun’s temple and see you sulking in the corner?” She flashed him a toothy smile. “Why don’t you give this poor old po-po some company instead...” 

To disguise the growing flush on his cheeks and ears, Childe coughed into his fist, “well… I suppose I can stay longer, thank you for the tea, Madam Ping. This is some good stuff, your granddaughter has excellent taste.” 

“Please, you may call me Ping po-po or granny. Madame sounds too stiff!” 

“Alright, granny, I’m Childe.”

“As in a kid?…. Hmm… how about haizi, you don’t mind that do you?” 

“Uhh…”

Before he could even turn her down, Madame Ping smiled her toothy grin again and resumed, “so, my xiao haizi, have some more tea while it’s hot.” The elderly lady extended her hand that grasped around the handle of the teapot, which had the painting of a white glaze lily on its deep blue surface. 

Madame Ping was, in fact, a good conversation partner. He didn’t even realise how quickly time passed until it was already dark. She was also very fond of her granddaughter, who was actually the famous legal adviser, Yanfei. Who knew? Not him at least. They didn’t really resemble each other, but he would not think too much about that. The old lady was also kind… perhaps too kind since she was extremely insistent about him staying at her place. It shocked her to know that Childe had been sleeping on the streets for the past two weeks (“Granny it was on the stairs–” “Same difference”). 

“Why didn’t you tell me before!…This won’t do at all… Let this po-po give you a place to stay.” 

He opened his mouth only to get interrupted.

“I will not take no as an answer. I insist!”

And that was that. Her words were final and set in stone, as the Liyuens like to say. 

He was incredibly skeptical, however, when he was met with the same teapot that she poured tea out of. The same teapot with a beautiful white glaze lily painted on. 

“This is your house?” Childe asked.

“Correct,” Granny replied.

“And I’m supposed to go inside this?” he asked again, just to be sure.

“Yes, come on now, I didn’t pin you for the shy type.” She raised her brow at him.

Childe wasn’t sure if Granny Ping was making fun of him or this was actually real. Perhaps anything is possible in Liyue. He heard about worldscapes or mirages that were built by witches in Mondstadt. Maybe a house inside of a teapot isn’t that far fetched. 

“Before I go inside… your house? Are you sure you want to let in–” Childe points to himself, “a stranger called a low class qigai by basically everyone.”

Granny Ping frowned at his choice of words.

“My dear, you are anything but that. I’m an excellent judge of character, and all I see is a troubled grandchild of mine trying to find a place to stay,” she paused and looked at him from head to toe, “and someone who needs proper clothes.”

Ouch.

Madame Ping instructed him to touch the teapot, and he did as told. Before he knew it, white mist surrounded him, he felt dizzy and a bit light as if his feet were in the air. Childe opened his eyes once he felt stable enough and could feel his feet touching something solid. He was standing on a grassy field with a bright blue sky and a classic Liyuen mansion in front of him. 

Adeptal magic can be really scary with all the things it’s capable of doing. 

“No need to look so speechless, my dear.” 

.

Now that Childe has a place to stay and absolutely no idea what to do, he keeps doing what every person who has too much time on their hand does. 

Lay on their bed and contemplate life. 

He’s unemployed and has no proper place of his own. Granny Ping was kind enough to let him stay at her house–teapot…her abode. But for how long? He can’t take advantage of every old person in Liyue. First, it was Master Liu Siu and now Granny Ping. If his coworkers were here, they’d be laughing at how low he fell. 

And fall he did.

To another universe.

So hard. 

He doesn’t know how to stand up from that fall, how to recover from it, where to start nor what to do. He’s completely clueless. 

Childe is (or should he say was?) her majesty’s vanguard. A warrior. A sword. Now that he is no longer hers, he’s left alone with no purpose, his fate is to become a dull and rusted weapon.

Once again, he regrets being nonchalant about superstitions. He’s never going to take lightly about any elderly’s words from now on. 

“Tsk…Should have checked that damned hourglass for traps. Speaking of which…” Childe jumped up from his bed and rummaged through his dark satchel. 

He still had one bag of mora, a heavy bag, in fact. Some knick knacks like dirty bamboo sticks from the tigerfish he ate, a pair of spoon and fork, a dagger like knife, his grey uniform and voila! The hourglass. 

It was quite the delicate looking thing with a golden frame. But the sand inside it was still. He flipped it yet the sand was stuck. It wouldn’t flow. He flipped it twice or thrice. Yet nothing happened. The hourglass stopped working. Possibly because of the humidity in Liyue, but it was working fine when he first received it. 

With a sigh, he carelessly tossed it onto the bed. But the hourglass seemed to have a mind of its own, rolling faster than ever down the bed and before Childe could even catch it, he watched the oh so delicate looking thing fall down to inevitably shatter– 

It was safe and sound, clinking as it rolled slowly towards his feet.

He picked the hourglass and stared at it. How did it not shatter from the impact? It was strange, the bed’s height was around his waist, and anything made of delicate material such as glass or ceramic would have shattered. 

There was a knock on the door and Childe’s thoughts came to a halt. 

“My dear, care to have dinner with me?” Madam Ping said from behind the door.

Quickly he placed the hourglass on a nearby table. “Of course! Just a moment,” he replied and quickly wiped his hands on his pants and roughly fixed his hair. Opening the door to see Granny Ping standing outside with a smile. 

.

Days passed, but it felt as if months and years went by. Childe grew more anxious and aimless by the day. He mostly stayed in Madame Ping’s abode, helping her around the place with cleaning, cooking and laundry. Sometimes fixing up the furniture, which she said he didn’t need to, the house could do self repair, thanks to the teapot spirit called tubby who guarded the mansion. 

His days were pretty domestic. It felt like he was back home, spending time with his younger siblings. Except, there was this constant voice in his head that would not stay quiet. Reminding him every minute, every hour of the day that he was taking advantage of a poor old lady, that he was stuck in this strange Liyue, and he was as useless as a broken sword. Those haughty-taughty Liyuen nobles weren’t wrong, maybe he is a qigai. 

Madame Ping likely noticed his restlessness and on one of the days, sat him down with a cup of tea. It worked wonders honestly. Today's pick was juhua cha. According to her, it was good for sleep and to ease nervousness. Either the old lady was extremely perceptive or he had less than stellar control over his emotions than he initially thought. If it was the latter, then he partially blames it on Granny Ping’s warm presence.

“Xiao haizi, sometimes I see you staring off mindlessly and other times I see you pacing around back and forth. This old one is good at listening, if you want to share your troubles.” Granny Ping picked up a sunflower seed from the plate filled with a variety of nuts: melon seeds, sunflower seeds, dried fruits, raisins, peanuts and many more.

Childe let out a troubled laugh, “am I that obvious?”

“I may have glasses on but that doesn’t mean I’m blind, my dear.”

Guess he can’t keep avoiding the perceptiveness of an old lady. 

“I’m afraid those are the rules, haizi.” 

“Did I say that out loud?”

“Yes, you did. Don’t be so dumbfounded now, it’s becoming a permanent face of yours these days.”

“And you’ve been getting sassier by the day.”

“Oh, hush now! Don’t chug the tea! Have some snacks with it too.”

.

Later, Childe signed the recruitment form for the Adventurer’s Guild (suggested by Granny Ping because of course she had her 2 mora worth of thoughts to say after his spiel of “I’m taking advantage of you”) and they were happy to provide him with the handbook and a few beginner’s commissions. 

What’s funny to him is that…The fatui appeared in the “enemy” section of the handbook. Knowing that the Adventurer’s Guild main branch was in Snezhnaya, he wondered how the Mayor overlooked this.

He briefly went over his commissions and was supposed to: 1) clear out a few hilichurls groups 2) kill a ruin guard that was terrorising a nearby farm 3) Grab some bamboo shoots and… 4) a cooking commission. Nothing challenging, nevertheless, he had something to do other than laying in bed. 

First, he started off with the ruin guard, which was in fact a ruin hunter–whoever gave the commission had potatoes for eyes because ruin hunters differ greatly from ruin guards. One shot to its eye and the automaton came crashing down. He could do this with his eyes closed. 

The A-yi living nearby the farm seemed thankful for its disappearance and gave him a few pieces of zongzi. 

Next were the hilichurl groups, they were also decimated within minutes. Childe had to make a run to Qingce village though, to grab some bamboo shoots, which he assumed was part of the cooking commission since it came from the same place. He got back into Liyue harbour before it was too late and dropped the bundle of bamboo shoots to Wanmin restaurant. Chef Mao, who also thanked him by giving some free food, greeted him. 

“I’m wondering if giving out food to strangers is a common practice in Liyue,” Childe asked while eating his chicken skewer. 

Chef Mao quirked his brow. “Consider it something we do out of love, and maybe it’s also because you need some more meat on your arms, young lad,” he paused before yelling, “AIYAH! Xiangling, my child! What is that terrible smell?”

Pots and pans clattered and a faint “am okay!” could be heard from the kitchen. 

“This daughter of mine…” 

Xiangling, the troublemaker, the title given by her father, rushed out of the kitchen with her trusty partner in crime, Guoba. Noticing his presence, the little fellow gave him an enthusiastic wave. To which the little guy received an aggressive pat on the head by Childe. It was hard to resist the urge, Guoba was too adorable and he always wanted to pat the little guy’s head. It looked so soft and fluffy!

“Ehem, are you here for the cooking commission?” Xiangling looked at him with sparkling eyes, so bright that he could turn blind just by looking at them for too long. 

“Yep, here’s the list if you want to be sure.”

“Perfect! I’ve got just the thing for you.”

I don’t like the sound of that. 

The cooking commission…wasn’t cooking. They needed someone to be a guinea pig for Xiangling’s new recipes. Now, Childe was not some fresh meat, unaware of the young girl’s questionable choice of ingredients. He’s been through it many times. Like when he would go for a quick lunch after work from Northland Bank or a friendly dinner together with Zhongli. Xiangling would always sneak in a few work-in-progress recipes in his order. 

Here’s the thing, he’d eat all those slime condensate spicy stir fry… a thousand times over vishap horns ground to powder and used as a topping on his golden shrimp balls. 

“Hey now, it’s not that bad,” the young chef frowned, her sparkly eyes turning watery as Guoba, her trusty partner, patted her on the back. 

Meanwhile, Childe was too busy keeping a few bites of Xiangling’s food down his throat. 

At least he earned some more freebie food from Chef Mao, who felt apologetic for his daughter’s antics. 

.

“Oh there you are, boy! Feels like I haven’t seen you in ages,” Master Liu Siu fusses over him and pushes one steaming basket into his hands. 

“Freshly made crystal shrimp, eat them. You look like you haven’t had a bite of food. Tsk-tsk,” the old man clucked his tongue and put on a hard face. “All of us were terribly worried, you na~ xiaozi. Worried sick wondering whether you dropped dead on some street or got robbed by some thugs. At least you could have dropped by to say hello!” 

Childe opened his mouth–

“Gone for days! The entire teahouse grew grey hairs from the stress! We didn’t know your name nor your whereabouts!”

Then he closed his mouth–

“At least say something, boy. You look like a carp, opening and closing that mouth of yours,” Master Liu Siu sighed dramatically, and if he didn’t know any better, there’d be a few wrinkles forming on his forehead alongside some grey hairs.

“Aiyah, he’ll talk if you let him speak first, you big old fool,” an elderly man said from the back before standing up from his seat. “Don’t mind him, he just misses his old cat, Huo. A stray, like you. Actually, you look a bit like him.”

“Do not bring Huo into this,” Master Liu Siu huffed, pulling out a handkerchief from his pocket but was completely ignored by the old man.

He slowly walked towards Childe with his arms behind the back and continued to speak, “I’ve heard that Ping has been taking care of you, hmm what was it she calls you?”

“It’s Childe… Mister?”

“Ah child yes! Haizi.”

“That’s not–”

He was interrupted, again. This was starting to become a trend here in Liyue. “Well, I don’t blame you for not recognising me. Who cares for old men? I’m Fan Er’ye, the owner of this teahouse.”

“Again, Sir, It’s Childe—”

“Yes, yes, child-not-child. Drop by here once in a while, or Liu Siu will go mad from worrying, he loves picking up some strays, you see.” 

Alright that’s it. I give up.

Right then, many pairs of heavy footsteps advanced rapidly up the stairs of the teahouse. A handful of Milleliths surrounded the area and blocked entry. They crowded around Childe. 

One of the Milleliths spoke up, “Sir Fan Er’ye, we request you to step away from the foreigner.” He took a scroll out of his breast pocket and flicked it open in front of Childe.

“You, named child, are under arrest for violating the laws of Liyue and Teyvat, for the production and distribution of counterfeit mora.”

The entire teahouse gasped collectively, the lively atmosphere abruptly turned into a grim one. Most of the customers were too stunned to say or do anything other than look at Childe with utter shock. Most likely they were all clucking their tongues and staring at him with judgement filled eyes. 

“Follow us quietly or you shall be forcefully taken to the Qixing.” 

First off, shout out to my fav jiejie again for helping with the cn part of this fic. I swear yall have no idea how I spam her dms day and night. Love her so much <3. And for some reason whenever I tried to take this fic in a serious direction, it ended up turning into comedy– HELP. I also tried (keyword tried) to do linking footnotes but… I can’t… too troublesome.

[1] Moli cha - jasmine tea. A friend suggested it, since they hc that Madame Ping has a similar personality to Iroh (from ATLA) and he drinks a lot of jasmine tea. Anyways, I was searching up how it is prepared but it was too complicated for me to understand and gave up. I’m sorry TT

[2] Po-po - granny / grandmother.

[3] Qigai - beggar

[4] Haizi - kid / child.

[5] Xiao - small or little in this context (the word on its own)

[6] Juhua cha - chrysanthemum tea

[7] Zongzi - glutinous rice with different fillings and is wrapped in bamboo leaves.

[8]Na xaiozi - It basically means brat or rascal affectionately. You’ll see it being used a lot in dramas. I was suggested by my jiejie to put them together as it'll look less strange for English speakers buuuut it makes it sound a little weird in the sentence altogether, so another friend suggested to actually separate them!

[9] Huo - fire