#yugyeom suffered greatly in this

[kpopsickies]

Got7 sickfic part 2

Y’all. There will be a part 3

Maybe part 4

I have no self control.... help

Bambam p.o.v

The group continued to watch for most of the rest of the day. By the time 9pm hit everyone except Jayb, Jinyoung and I were asleep. The three of us talked in hushed voices, “I’m really worried about Yugyeom” Jinyoung said quietly, Jaebum and I both nodded, “I know he’s incredibly stubborn and will continue to insist he’s fine, even though he’s obviously not” Both of them agreed with me, “I’m surprised Jackson didn’t put up more of a fight” Jaebum said, stealing a glance at the Chinese member. “honestly me too” Jinyoung said, tracking the leader’s gaze. “do you guys think Youngjae hyung is on the way to getting sick?” both of the nodded, the three of us glanced over at him. He was asleep but breathing through his mouth, confirming that he was likely sick. My eyes wandered over to the maknae, I had grown worried about my best friend, I felt a hand on my shoulder and saw the leader behind me, “you alright Bam?” 

“I’m worried about Yugyeom, he had a really high fever, like... really high. And despite what he said, he doesn’t actually usually run warm.” 

“I know, he’s just being stubborn. Eventually he’ll confess” 

We were distracted from our conversation when a painful sounding cough was heard from Mark. The leader made his was over to the oldest member and Jaebum gently rubbed his shoulder, Jinyoung left and returned a second later with a cup of water and handed it to the leader, who helped Mark sit up and brought the cup to his lips, Mark thanked him softly, his voice rough and soft. Mark drank the water, “you okay hyung?” I asked, all three of the members who weren’t sick all stood around the eldest, “yeah.” he coughed, “better now” Jaebum checked the clock, “all the sickies can take medicine in about 45 minutes, I’ll make some food so they have something to take it with.” the three awake members nodded. “in about half an hour start waking up the sleeping sickies” Jaebum instructed before leaving.

Mark fell asleep almost instantly after the leader left, and Jinyoung left to help the leader at some point. I sat down on the couch next to Yugyeom. I placed my hand on his forehead, not surprised that he was still quite more. He softly groaned as I did, he turned over, whimpering softly, his eyes fluttered open, “you okay Yugs?” 

“felt good���

“what did?”

“your hand, ‘s cold”

“my hands aren’t that cold Yugs, you just have a really high fever” 

“oh” he turned away from me and sneezed twice. “bless you” 

“thanks” he said softly, he sat up, the color faded from his face. “take it slowly dude, I don’t want you to pass out” 

“m okay” his words were slurred slightly, I gently pushed his shoulder and guided him back to laying down. “I’m not that sick” he said softly, “actually I think you are” he shook his head, wincing slightly after. “I’ll be right back Yugs, DON’T GET UP” he nodded slightly. I went to the kitchen “hey hyung? where’s the thermometer?”

“on the table, why?” 

“Yugyeom is awake and he’s kinda delirious and is very unsteady, I just wanted to check his temperature.” 

“okay, tell us when you find out” I nodded and took the thermometer to the living room over to ear the maknae sat, he seemed to be only half awake and was humming let it go under his breath. “hey yugs” he glanced at me, but I honestly couldn’t tell if he actually saw me. “I need to check your temperature” the maknae half nodded, “open your mouth, this goes under your tongue” under normal circumstances I wouldn’t have explained it, but something told me the maknae needed a bit of help today. He followed my directions, “keep it under your tongue and keep your lips closed tight” the maknae did as instructed, the thermometer beeped after a few seconds, I took it out and was shocked, and worried, 39.7 (103.5) 

“shit Yugyeom, you’re really hot”

“thanks hyung” he giggled and started standing up, I grabbed his shoulder, “what are you doing?”

“I gotta go”

“where?”

“I gotta go”

“where are you going” 

“the muffin man he needs my help” I was so taken aback by his words I almost let go of him, but I quickly composed myself, “HYUNG!!!! Come here!” I was slightly panicked not even thinking about the three sleeping members. Jaebum and Jinyoung hurried in the room from the kitchen and the three sleeping members began stirring. “what’s wrong Bam?” I pointed at the maknae, “I ga-go” 

“go where Yugs?” Jaebum asked looking confused but worried, “muffin man, he needs me” the maknae mumbled, still trying to stand up. “what’s wrong with him?” Youngjae asked, having woken up from my yelling. His voice displayed the panic I felt. “I think he’s delirious” Jaebum said, Jinyoung turned to me, “what’s his temerature?” 

“39.7″ all the members stopped what they were doing and stared at me in shock, “seriously?” Mark asked in a cracked voice, I nodded, “we need to bring his fever down” Jaebum said, “how?” 

“he’s gonna kill us for this, but ice bath” Jaebum said before turning to me “Bambam can you help me get him to the bathroom” I nodded, the two of us half dragged half carried the maknae down the hallway. The entire was he mumbled incoherent words. 

Jinyoung p.o.v 

I watched as Jaebum and Bambam half carried Yugyeom out of the room. “I’ve never seen him like that, it’s kinda scary” Youngjae said softly, “it is, I’ve never seen anyone like that” I agreed, “I’m surprised he got so sick so fast” Mark said softly, his voice barely hanging on by a thread. “I wonder if he was sick be-f-f-hEtChu- IAtcHU- hh-TcHu- sorry ugh, I wonder if he was sick before”

“possibly, both Yugyeom and I have been here for a couple days longer than you guys and now that I think about it Yugyeom was a bit sneezier than usual, even for him. But he kept saying it was allergies” I explained to the others, “I think maybe he knew he was getting sick but didn’t want to bother you guys with the comeback plans coming, but now that he’s not the only one sick he stopped fighting it and his body is finally allowing him to relax.” as Mark spoke, his voice cracked after the words and he coughed a few times. “that makes sense. Also, stop talking hyung” Youngjae said nudging Mark with his knee. Mark nodded and cleared his throat. “how are you feeling Youngjae?” I asked, he shrugged, “that’s not an answer” Jackson said half rolling his eyes. “I don’t feel too bad, mainly just a stuffy nose and a bit of a sore throat.” Youngjae explained, “Let’s try and get you guys feeling better before you end up like Yugyeom” I said standing up and going to the kitchen to finish the food that Jaebum had begun so the sick members could eat and take medicine sooner rather than later. 

Bambam p.o.v

I hoped things were going better with the others than they were with Yugyeom, because the makane had gotten the idea in his head that we were trying to torture him. He fought against us the whole time, even getting to the point where he tried to punch me. It was scary because it really seemed like he didn’t know who we were, who he was, or what he were trying to do. 

At some point the poor kid exhausted himself and gave in to us, whimpering softly the whole time. Once we got done we took him into his room, he seemed a bit more aware and wasn’t openly fighting against us anymore. We brought the sick maknae to his bedroom and helped him into a tshirt and light, thin, pajama pants. He whimpered softly, “what’s wrong?” I asked him gently patting his shoulder, “don’t- hngtChU- nngtcHH- hh-engtCH-feel good. ‘m cold” 

“I’m sorry Yugs, but we don’t want to raise your fever.” he coughed uncovered, causing me to step back a bit. “Jaebum hyung can you go get the thermometer?” The leader nodded and left the room. “Bam?” I looked at the maknae, he held his hand extended out. I took it, “can you stay” his voice was soft and timid” he coughed again, “I don’t like being alone when I don’t feel good” I nodded, I took it as a good sign that the maknae’s words were coherent now. I knew that Yugyeom was hesitant to show his weak side to us, despite being the makane he always fought to appear strong. I sat down on the bed next to him, he leaned over and placed his head on my shoulder. “hyung, I’m not feeling good” 

“I know” he sniffled, I glanced over at him, worried he was crying, but he, thankfully, was not. “thank you for taking care of me”

“no problem” I said softly, the maknae lay down in bed, “tired”. he said softly, “why don’t you sleep. I’ll wake you up later” The maknae nodded and layd down and closed his eyes. Once he fell asleep I left the room and closed the door. I went to the kitchen and saw the JJ parents cooking. “Hey hyungs, Yugyeom is asleep.”

“okay, that’s probably a good thing, he needs to sleep” 

“we’ll wake him up in about half an hour so he can eat and take medicine.” Jinyoung commented, taking a few bowls of soup to the living room. “keep the pot on a low temp to keep warm” he instructed as he left. 

About half an hour later Jaebum and I went up to the maknae’s room, Jaebum carrying a bowl of soup, I brought the pills and thermometer. When we opened the door we were both a bit surprised to see the maknae was awake, “Hey Yugs! How’re you feeling?”

“okay. Not great though” he admitted softly, surprising me. “well let’s get some food into you then medicine.” The leader said setting the bowl down next to Yugyeom. The maknae mumbled a thank you. Which I took as a good sign. The leader handed the thermometer to Yugyeom, The maknae slipped in under his tongue. A moment later it beeped, “38.9″ (102)

“that’s a bit better, but not great” Yugyeom looked at me, “what was it be-ff-hngtChHu- ngtcHHu- before”

“bless you, and 39.7″ he looked really surprised, “that high?” 

“do you remember anything?” I asked, somewhat worried, “no, nothing really. I thought I slept. I don’t even know when or how I ended up in my room. “it was kinda scary actually, you weren’t really making sense. You kept trying to fight us and you were really emotional” Yugyeom looked embarrased. “sorry guys” 

“it’s not a bad thing, we were mainly just worried about you” The leader said, he nudged the maknae and nodded to the bowl of soup, taking the hint Yugyeom picked up the spoon and began eating it. “do you want to stay here or go down with the other members?”

“stay here, I’m tired, I’ll go back to sleep after I eat” we both nodded, “can you stay though?” he asked me, “sure” Jaebum smiled a bit, “I’ll go check on the others” he said closing the door as he left. 

Jaebum p.o.v

I was glad that Yugyeom wanted Bambam to stay because I was worried about leaving the maknae alone for a long time. As I started walking down the stairs I felt a slight tickle in my nose and throat, I cleared my throat a few times hoping the sensation would go away. It somewhat did, but the itch was still eating at the back of my mind. I got down to the living room, Jinyoung and the 3 sick members were watching a korean dub of a disney movie, “how’s the maknae?” Youngjae asked when he saw me, bringing the attention away from the screen and onto me. I noticed every member had the same look of concern. “He’s doing better, He’s still got a fever but it’s gone down a considerable ammount” 

“what is it now?” Mark asked, his voice barely surviving. Jinyoung shot him a glare while Jackson scolded the eldest, “no talking” 

“38.9″

“that’s not great but it is-” Jackson was cut off when Youngjae sneezed four times. He quickly apologized, but Jackson wasn’t fazed, “bless you, it’s good that it’s gone down. Especially because Youngjae is definitely sick” Youngjae half glared, but didn’t deny what the Chinese member had said. “how are you guys feeling?” Youngjae asked looking between me and Jinyoung, “surprisingly fine” Jinyoung said, “but you also have a really strong immune system” Youngjae said with a playful bitterness, I knew he was refencing the fact that in the 7 years we lived together he had gotten sick a grand total of 5 times. “how about you?” Mark asked me. 

“STOP TALKING!” Jackson half yelled at the oldest member, shoving his shoulder, Mark laughed a bit which turned to a cough. “can we ducktape his mouth shut? He keeps talking, he’s going to absolutely destroy his voice” Jackson said, looking half annoyed and fully concerned, “Surprisingly, I’m with Jackson on this” Jinyoung said, he side eyed the eldest member. “guys, I’m f-HNXTCHh HKXtcHH HHnXKtch” he noticeably winced at the sneezes and rubbed his throat. “have you tried not stifling them” Jackson said, looking worried, Mark shook his head, his eyes were teary, I wasn’t sure if he was crying from the pain and fever or his eyes were just watering, but I assumed the former. “Do we have any throat numbing spray?” Jackson asked, a comforting hand on Mark’s shoulder. “I don’t think so. I can go pick some up, I need some groceries anyways” I said. I stood up, “I can go real fast. Can you guys think of anything else we need?” They shook their heads, Mark raised his hand, “text it” Jackson said, he handed the eldest his phone. Mark typed something out, Jackson took the phone, “he said fever reducers” Jackson placed his hand on Mark’s forehead, “Your fever isn’t that high” Mark shook his head and pointed upstairs. “for Yugyeom?” Mark nodded, “Okay, I’ll do that.” 

I left the house, kinda glad to get fresh air and be away from the petri-dish my house was quickly becoming. I was kinda worried because I had a sneaking suspicion that I was getting sick, and I really didn’t want to, I wanted to be able to take care of the members. And I knew they wouldn’t let me if I was sick. 

[prettywordsyouleft]

Identity

Summary: You had been an angel since your creation. When you fell in love with Jinyoung, a demon, you hadn’t thought it would be that hard to follow him wherever he went – even to the fiery depths of Hell. Becoming one of the Fallen was much different than you had expected, and finding who you were now was important.

Pairing: Park Jinyoung x reader

Genre: demon au / fluff(ish)

A/N: requested by anon. I found your request fitted in well with the happenings of my demon world I already had created, so this is a follow up to Sacrifice, Jinyoung’s story in the King of Demons series. Although this idea isn’t as dark as perhaps you were looking for anon, I hope you enjoy it all the same.

This story belongs in the King of Demons realm and you can find the stories in this series here

King of Demons series: Havoc // King of Demons // Unfathomable // Sacrifice // King of Demons: The Return // In The Night // Identity // Prophecy // Someone // The Devil Contained // The Monsters Witch

Word count: 1860

Your fall from piety had taken a lot more to get used to than you thought it would. It wasn’t just the difference in temperature, although the heat had definitely been a little burdensome in the beginning. You were an angel who had fallen in love with a demon. And even though Jinyoung had done everything in his power, even going as far to erase your memory of him, to keep you as the beautiful angel you had been, your heart belonged to him. You were prepared to give up everything for him, and when the time came for Jinyoung to return to his homeland, you hadn’t second-guessed the sacrifice you would need to give in order to follow him.

“I don’t want you to lose your wings like I did, it’s not easy, Y/N,” he warned you, yet he held you close in his arms, his body not wanting to let you go like his words were attempting to. “You have always been an angel; it was what you were created to be.”

“As were you.”

Jinyoung chuckled softly. “No darling, I was always suited to be a demon. I like the fires, the warmth of Hell. You have no idea what you’re stepping into if you follow me. You can’t take it back. The Heavens will brand you a traitor and you will be banished to Sheol for the rest of your existence.”

“I’m already a traitor for not giving the Gods the information on you, am I not?”

“Yes, but-”

“Jinyoung, I can’t lose you. Fallen angel or not, if I have you at my side, I can do anything.”

Your confidence waned when you actually became one of the Fallen. Jinyoung had been right, your identity was an Angel of Truth, and whilst you still felt the same person within, there was something inherently missing from you now. In Hell, you had no role, no place which was made for just you. Of course, you had been very welcomed. As the Prince of Sheol, Jinyoung had announced you as his bride and everyone accepted you as that. You knew some of the entities there already and you weren’t ever lonely. But you didn’t have an identity passed what Jinyoung had given you. You didn’t want to just spend your life following him around, smiling now and then and being a puppet bride. It wasn’t what you wanted for yourself. You craved something of your own.

“You know you can do anything right? I’ll support whatever you want to do,” Jinyoung told you one night, your unspoken worries easily reaching his mind. He knew you too well despite your love existing for only a mere year so far. “You are capable of so much, Y/N. Just say the word, and I’ll make it happen.”

“Can’t I earn my place instead?” you asked and Jinyoung blinked. “I know I’m your bride and since you’re the Prince of Sheol, I don’t really have to do anything, but I’d like to. I want to help make this place better and remain as fair as you envision it to be. This is my home now too.”

“Do you want me to help you find a position then?”

You shook your head adamantly. “Let me try for myself.”

The very next day, you approached Jackson at Purgatory, smiling brightly up at him. “Y/N! What do I owe the pleasure of your visit?”

“Can I work here today? I’m looking to find my place,” you told him and the demon frowned.

“In Purgatory… you want to work here?”

You nodded. “Of course! I want to learn all about Sheol and its jurisdictions.”

“It’s not an easy job, there’s a lot of suffering that happens here. We have to make sure every entity is trialled fairly. There are a lot of steps in where you decide to place someone. Sometimes they stay here, others will move onto Silence or Torment depending on their sins. Are you sure someone as sweet as you could handle this type of work?”

“At least let me try,” you pleaded and with a sigh, Jackson nodded.

Jackson had been right in his warning. Initially, you had taken on his advice, walking alongside him as he scanned the area slowly. There were so many people and they were all doing so many different things. You admired his ability to know what everyone was doing, yelling out in the middle of his explanations at specific people to get back in line. It was impressive and you aspired to match his tenacity.

But you just weren’t cut out for the work. “Y/N, you’re an Angel of Truth. Yet you didn’t pick up that man was lying through his teeth. He pulled at your heartstrings.”

“I was an angel,” you correctly softly, your mood plummeting. You had known the man wasn’t telling you everything, yet his tears had rendered you speechless. You wanted to help him out and that was why you almost passed him until Jackson grabbed him by the collar, smiled wickedly and said to an official to take him off to Silence. You didn’t have the heart to be firm when you were struggling in your current weakened state. Thanking Jackson for his time, you trudged back to your chambers where you slumped down into a chair heavily.

“What’s wrong?” Jinyoung asked, looking up from his papers he was reviewing. Jaebum and Jinyoung had just spent two days strategising for a new district in Sheol to help lessen some of the volume of inhabitants there were in other areas. You knew he was busy and tried to smile at him instead. He didn’t buy it, merely rearranged his glasses on his face. “Baby, I worked alongside you for months on end, I know that face well. Did you not have a good time in Purgatory?”

“I almost passed someone because they played on my good will.”

“You are too kind-hearted for that line of work,” he mentioned pointedly. His words held no comfort, but you knew Jinyoung to be logical when giving advice. “Have you thought about talking with Demi? She works in running messengers around Sheol. That could be fun for you.”

You perked up. “I’ll go talk to her tomorrow!”

Again, much like with Jackson, you had given it your best. But what Demi had in skill as a half-demon, you lacked now that you had lost your powers along with your wings. You weren’t fast enough and a goblin managed to pass on your message to your client before you could. You then tried with BamBam, Sheol’s gatekeeper, but you opened the wrong gate and let out a rampage of wild ogres that took two days to finally put back where they belonged. Youngjae had invited you to help him look after all the creatures of Sheol. As an animal lover, you had thought you finally found your calling. You didn’t want to be judgmental as you had been taught to find beauty in everything, yet you had been entirely frightened by a monster he named Smoosh, that had far too many eyes and leapt at you in a menacing way. You were too scared to close your eyes that night in case you had nightmares. Finally, you had broken one of Yugyeom’s trinkets in a vision that he had before you could even start working for him, and so Mal had to tell you to leave before Yugyeom had another rage about it. With Jaebum’s lover away on Earth, her role wasn’t even open to learn from, and Mark was Jaebum’s right-hand man. You were out of options, and your heart hurt.

“Baby, did you do this?” Jinyoung asked that evening, and you didn’t even look up from the chair you slouched upon, not wanting to be scolded for cleaning up his study when he was out. Glaring at the wall in front of you, you remained unmoving. Your husband stepped into your view and held up a file. “Did you organise this?”

“Scold me if you want to, I’m too tired to care.”

“Why would I scold you? This is excellent!”

You glanced up at him and sat straight in your chair. “…it is?”

“I didn’t realise how badly the organisation was of my files. This makes everything so clean and accessible. Thank you!”

“I did something right?” you wondered and Jinyoung nodded, soon smiling sheepishly. “What?”

“You wouldn’t hate doing the other files, would you?” You shook your head quickly, jumping out of your chair. Jinyoung chuckled and held out an arm to prevent you from leaving the room. “Tomorrow, there’s no rush.”

It started with reorganising his files in the cabinet, and then you moved onto the land surveys. After that was the ancient texts, and you had spent a lot of time reading as well as cleaning. Soon you were knowledgeable about the past and present of Hell. Jaebum had been impressed over dinner when you mentioned about a pocket of land free for use that you had seen on a map earlier in the day, and Jinyoung beamed at you proudly.

“Tomorrow, you don’t have to work in my study anymore,” he told you as you got ready for bed. You glanced up at Jinyoung, a pout forming on your lips. He smiled warmly, reaching over to pluck your pout away. “You have an official position now. My brother was really impressed tonight.”

“He was?”

Jinyoung nodded. “He wants you to work in my office. Do you think you can handle that? I know you wanted to find your own identity without my help, but I think you found your calling. As a strategist, I know you could benefit my plans greatly.”

“We used to work together up in Heaven,” you said slowly, thinking over what he said. “I never had a problem doing so either.”

“So why did you shun away from me when you got here?” he wondered and you let out a heavy breath. “Was I too much in the beginning?”

“You knew who you were. You had your place here set in stone, and everyone didn’t second-guess it. I was a newcomer and I had nothing to me but my name.”

Jinyoung stopped unbuttoning his shirt and cupped your face within his hands. “You have always had more than just your name. I’m sorry I needlessly worried you when I told you losing your wings would be hard. I didn’t fall in love with you because you were an angel though. Just like none of our friends here see you as incapable because you weren’t created for this realm. You had your abilities all along. Why do you think I loved working with you up in Heaven? Youngjae was absolutely useless most days, you kept us running efficiently. It’s something I love about you.”

“Okay, stop there or I’ll start crying,” you warned and you felt his chest vibrate with laughter as he pulled you into an embrace. “I needed to find myself again.”

“You did. And have you?”

“All thanks to you,” you told him and Jinyoung pulled back, shaking his head.

“It was all you.”

_________________

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[rkpjy]

⭐️MGA 5 EPISODE 4 - SECOND CHANCE ↪ performing i want to fall in love by kim johan with @jacksxnrk version: x (2:00 - 4:00, arranged by the two of them) line distribution: x

Are you really happy at this moment?

and to think that around the same time last week, jinyoung almost expected to hear his name called for the top 3 singing performances. while it’s a competition and a lot of people have already gone home, making the prospect of winning seem more difficult than anticipated... does he really deserve to be eliminated this early? if he didn’t think he was talented enough to win, jinyoung wouldn’t have bothered applying. it doesn’t mean he believes himself to be better than everyone else, but he believes in himself and honestly, he thinks they’re wrong. no matter how he looks at it, no matter how he looks back at his performance with jeonghan and thinks of their flaws... there were duos worse than theirs. but of course, that’s only his truth. he gets no say in it, and did not hear the judges’ comments prior to taking their decision.

to be called mediocre of all things. on a show that clearly isn’t searching for the best talent, it seems a bit insulting. he waits to be given the reason why so jisub thinks that, but it never comes. jinyoung meets his fate with pursed lips and a nod, wrapping an arm around jeonghan’s shoulder for support. neither of them should be sent home right now, but here they are, after working their butts off all week. it’s everyone’s case, probably. but taking a look around him, he can’t help but feel as though the winners have already been selected, and the rest of them were just props meant to fill in some airtime since the beginning. he understands that he’s nobody. he’s no ex-idol, no ex-contestant, he doesn’t have a whole band of friends with him. he’s exactly how he felt the second week: invisible. everyone in this country knows how much these types of shows are scripted, but now that he’s experiencing it first hand, it’s worse than he’d imagined.  mnet has its picks, some that are in the top contestants right now, some who just benefit from a lot of screentime. there are others who jinyoung believe made their own path, like sihyeon who more than anyone here deserves the praises she’s been given so far. he thinks of heejin too, who is no doubt a favorite, but a girl with that much talent and star quality will always hog the spotlight. no one can blame her.

he clenches his fist. for the first time since coming here, there’s a rage growing inside him. he shouldn’t be standing here. if they want to see his true colors, he’ll throw it at them. he feels the urge to decline the second chance at performing, but it would be seen as giving up. he won’t give them that satisfaction, considering they barely notice his existence to begin with. it’s up to him to show them what they’ve been missing, and he’s greatly satisfied to learn he’ll be doing it with jackson.

this week is all about redemption. if so far he’s been a nobody to them, he can only hope to turn things around and let everyone know he’s not someone to mess with. but this could go both ways. he could be beaten down twice in a row. they could still hate it, and belittle their efforts. there’s no pity in this industry, he’s learned that a while ago. but just because they’re big shot ceos doesn’t mean they’re always right. how many times have they rejected talented people who went on to become superstars? so clearly, they aren’t all-knowing. they make mistakes just like everyone else. his talent will be recognized elsewhere if not with them. hyunbin wanted him twice. they will too.

jackson and him spend no time complaining about their situation. there’s no time for self-pity, and jinyoung honestly isn’t the type to just confide in anyone. they’re friends, but they’re not extremely close either. he shares how he’s feeling with his girlfriend, and for him that’s enough. he doesn’t avoid yugyeom at home either, and he congratulates him for moving on to the next round, but he doesn’t really... want to talk to him about what’s going on. he lets the younger enjoy himself and focuses on his own performance instead.

they soon decide on a song they’d like to attempt. it’s a nice ballad, with meaningful lyrics that don’t necessarily relate to their present situation, but tell a story they’d like to help come to life. about loneliness, something jinyoung has kept inside him for the longest time, and love. about being happy about what they have all while questioning why, in that case, they still feel so empty. but rather than only performing a simple cover, they decide to add harmonies to it that would be more fitting for a real duo. not just two people singing side by side, each having their own parts. they want to come together as one, and let their own vocal colors shine through.

they add high notes and other adlibs to the song, thinking this could set them apart and also show the judges the extent of their abilities. jinyoung is very good at emoting, so is jackson, but they also possess a technique they might not have focused on enough so far. for the past three weeks jinyoung has mostly tried to get out of his comfort zone and prove to himself and others that he can do many things and be good at it. but it’s time to go back to his roots, and belt out a powerful, emotional ballad. those are his true colors.

the set feels very empty without everyone sitting in the chairs on each side. there’s so few of them, and he looks at the other duos with a new found compassion. more than ever before, they’re all on the same boat. they both suffered a setback last week, but only two of them will be allowed to return. jinyoung doesn’t speak much, but he silently wishes them the best. the rest of the time he spends with jackson, reviewing the performance in his head. they both know what they have to do, but it’s just two minutes, and that’s very little time to impress a panel of five judges.

minhyun and jeonghan go first, and jinyoung watches his previous partner with frustration. jeonghan should not be here on this stage, he should be arriving later with the others, and so should he. there’s something so powerless about knowing just how much they’re talented but being unable to do anything about it.

once their turn comes, jackson and jinyoung make their way on stage, with their only prop being the microphone they’re each holding. there’s nothing else to focus on. no flashy outfits, no chairs, no glitter. just them and their voices. after briefly announcing their song choice and greeting the judges, they get ready, since they jump right into the song as soon as the music starts. jinyoung closes his eyes, and opens them again so they lock with jackson’s. he smiles. they can do this. they can wow them.

A life like this really seems nice I’m living a good life

it starts off sweetly, their voices resonating in harmony, and right after jackson belts out the first high note with brilliance. jinyoung feels hopeful as they go into the chorus, voices powerful but with a tenderness that shows just how much they feel what they’re singing. they don’t verse into melodrama, but if anyone in this room has ever felt lonely, they won’t be able to remain insensitive.

I’m so lonely, tears come into my eyes Loneliness comes and asks me Are you really happy at this moment?

jinyoung sings the last line alone, eyes closed as he climbs the notes one by one until reaching the final one. this song is vocally challenging for sure, more than any one he’s done up until now, but he’s a musical actor. it’s nothing he hasn’t done before. singing duets that tell a story, and not getting lost in the other’s voice. jackson is a wonderful partner in that aspect.

I answer (lonely) I’m so lonely (tears start to come) What is the reason for my existence? What is love? (what is love?) I’m so curious I am in love but I’m still lonely

the first part of this verse is jackson singing the main lyrics, while jinyoung does the adlibs. the ‘tears start to come’ is very high, and about as high as he can go without straining his voice. he’s usually comfortable in the middle range, as are most people with his tone of voice, but he can also reach unexpected high notes. and that is due to years of singing experience. he can now reach levels he couldn’t five years ago. they switch roles for the third line, with jinyoung singing the main lyrics, and they both finish together, gently, voices fading off as they let the music play.

after the very intense build up that just happened, there’s a long pause during which neither of them sings. they just let the track speak for itself, and let everyone and themselves catch their breath and return to a softer, quieter mood for the finale.

What is life? Why is it so lonely?

for a brief moment when jinyoung starts to sing, the music is silent, but it slowly picks up, guiding him through the last few notes, and jackon’s voice can be heard in the background, although very faint so it doesn’t outshine jinyoung’s. and right after it’s jinyoung’s turn to do his partner the same favor, harmonizing as jackson sings the last words.

it takes jinyoung a few seconds to get back to reality once they’re done, and after stepping off the stage he knows that this time there really is nothing more he could’ve done to prove to them that this is what he was born to do. this is him, and this type of song is what he excels at. some contestants would call it boring, but he couldn’t disagree more. there’s nothing boring about ballads, and it can capture and audience’s heart just as much. and a few people’s shitty opinions will not change the way he feels about it.