#your brain puts words you’re typing on your phone in a lower priority group than on your computer

[chilfucked]

i need to kiss him on the lips

[fatiguing-thoughts]

Change of Heart - Paul Lahote x Reader

Request: “Hey, since you don't feel comfortable writing about the poly imprinting thing the other anon suggested, I have an idea based on what they said that maybe you could write instead. So instead of the reader imprinting on both, a reaction type of thing for when the reader had a crush on one, but falls in love with the other with time. If it is preference style, you can get to show both situations (crush on Embry, but falls for Paul later and vice versa)”

this is the crush on Embry -> falling in love with Paul version

Having a mother who was obsessed with the beach was the reason that your life turned out the way it did. 

That’s where you met your best friend, Embry Call. 

His mother worked at the souvenir shop, she frequently brought him to the beach as well. So time after time of running into each other and playing together as kids-- you grew up hanging out all the time. 

Despite you living and going to school in Forks, you guys saw each other at minimum three times a week. And as you got older, you only hung out more. Even into young adulthood.

You guys did everything together. School dances when your moms forced you into going, going to see the movies either of you were dying to watch, and simply hanging around doing nothing. It was like you were dating, but if dating meant that you were merely best friends. No kissing, the awkward touching of hands here and there. 

But overall, you and Embry connected deeper than anyone else. You would stay up talking all night, picking the brains of one another’s minds. Listening to music together, singing your favorite songs. Sometimes you stared a little too long at his lips, but that was besides the point. You guys were friends. 

I had grown quite the crush on Embry, but I knew deep down that it wouldn’t be worth risking the friendship. I could never risk anything awkward between us. I have never felt this comfortable around another person before, and I doubt that I would find it again. So holding Embry close to my heart as a best friend was an idea that I was well acquainted with. I’d grown to accept it. 

Though, as time went on, he began to gain some newer friends, which was normal. What high school boy didn’t hang out with other boys? The only issue was, it seemed to tear into your Embry time. 

It was fine, really. Embry’s happiness was my top priority. But when he finally introduced me to his friends, I’ll admit I felt pretty excited. To finally meet some new people, to find friendship in those other than Embry. 

Embry was always my best friend, but it wouldn’t hurt to have a bigger circle. He spoke so highly of them all, how could I not be thrilled to meet them? 

So when I did, I could say that I was both incredibly nervous, yet excited. 

“They’re gonna love you.” He reassures me on our way to Jake’s house. 

“How do you know that?” I ask, fiddling with the rip in my jeans.

“Because, I love you. You’re the best friend anyone could ask for. They’re gonna think you’re a lot of fun and super cool, because you are.” He smiles that signature Embry Call grin. 

Friend. Ugh. Get it together, (Y/N). 

“Thank you, Em.” I smile back.

“Of course.” 

The drive to Jacob’s was quick from Embry’s considering they both lived in La Push. Pulling up into the house, Embry led me into the garage where they were working on Jacob’s project car, the rabbit. Embry would never shut up about it, his eyes brighter than the sun whenever he talked about how much fun it was, how he enjoyed finally being able to exercise his mechanic skills. 

“Hey guys, this is (Y/N). (Y/N), this is Jacob, Jared, Quil, and Paul. We have a few classes together.” He points at them as he says their names. 

“Hi.” I wave shyly. 

“(Y/N), I know you haven’t been here yet, but don’t worry. I’ll quickly become your favorite. Don’t stress.” Quil walks over, putting his arm around your shoulder and chuckling. 

“Oh great, thanks.” I roll my eyes. “You really weren’t kidding, Em. He’s nuts.” I giggle. 

“Wow, okay. Thanks for putting in a good word, Embry.” Quil laughs, walking back to where he stood. 

I quickly found myself growing comfortable, no wonder why Embry found good company in these guys. They were all so nice, so down to Earth. 

One in particular caught my attention, Paul. He was handsome, well built for his age. He seemed to be just as friendly as the rest, too. 

I watched as Embry and Jake worked on the engine, peering over the side of the hood. 

“Do you know anything about cars?” A charming voice rings out behind me. 

I turn over my shoulder and see Paul, I felt a blush begin to rise to my cheeks. Why did he get me so flustered for absolutely no reason?

“Uh, yeah. A little bit. Embry talks my ear off about them, plus I have some cars I like myself. But mechanical wise, they run circles around me.” I smirk. 

“Nice. They’re teaching me a lot more, I’m probably at the same level you’re at.�� He chuckles, his deep brown eyes piercing into mine. 

“No you’re not, (Y/N) still runs circles around you. I’m the best teacher around.” Embry teases. 

“Well, you heard it here first. Looks like I know more than you about cars.” I tease.

“Might have to teach me some stuff some time.” He smirks. 

I felt the blush creeping onto my cheeks again, so I bent my head down, glancing down at my feet, before returning his gaze. 

“Maybe.” 

Embry looks between us, discomfort slightly showing on his face, which left me a bit confused. 

The drive back to my house was a bit awkward. 

“Is everything okay?” I ask.

“I just... I got the vibe that you and Paul hit it off really well. Which would be fine, but he’s a bit of a... player. I just, I don’t want you to go through that. He’s a great friend, but he’s not a good boyfriend.” Embry gently tells me, looking into my eyes with his chocolate brown ones. 

“I see.” I swallow, looking out the window.

I was unsure of what to say. Paul seemed like a nice guy, but Embry wouldn’t steer me wrong. 

Over the next few weeks, I began to spend more and more time with them all. I grew to adore them more than I ever thought I would, they were just as important to me as Embry was now, my romantic feelings finally subsiding for him. Quil quickly became the impish friend that Embry told me he’d be, Jared was an absolute clown, Jake was beyond friendly, very caring. 

And well Paul... Paul was someone that really left me blushing almost constantly. He hung onto every word that left my mouth, and I did the same for him. He was sweeter than sugar to me, even if he was less of that to the rest of the group and everyone else. He had a certain softness in his voice, in his body language with me. Paul talked to me like I was the only person in the room, but Embry’s warning loomed over me like clouds over the rainy Forks sky. 

As time went on, Embry warned me again. He even spoke to Paul about it, apparently. Paul had told me about it one night while we were talking just the two of us. We begun to hang out just the two of us, yet I never let him call it a date as per Embry’s warning. 

While he was at first surprised I wouldn’t go on a date with him, he was persistent because he knew how I felt. He knew the connection we had. He was upset that I always reciprocated the flirting, but was always far too hesitant to make any larger moves. 

“Embry, I haven’t seen any other girls since you brought her to hang out.” 

“I don’t know Paul... I don’t want (Y/N) to be the same as every other girl for you.”

“She’s not, she’s different. You know that. I really like her, I never felt this before. She won’t say yes unless you’re okay with it.” 

“Don’t make me regret this, Paul.” 

“You won’t.” 

Paul would hold my hand when I would get scared during horror movie night. He would pick me up for hangouts for the pure fact that he could drive me home, despite me being able to drive and having my own car. He would give me his hoodies when I would grow cold, whispering about how they looked better on me than him. Paul grew protective over me, always making sure that every adventure we took together, he would be there to make sure I stayed in one piece due to my clumsiness. Paul truly thought I was this fragile piece of glass that could shatter at any moment. 

 He would surprise me with my favorite drink from Starbucks when I was having a rough day at work. The way he would always have to touch me, whether that be resting an arm around my shoulder, holding my hand, or resting a hand on my thigh or lower back. All of the above sending my nerves in a frenzy. He was protective, slightly jealous. He didn’t like when guys checked me out, so he made it known I was his when he would press a kiss to my lips, then smirking at them, pulling me into him. 

 I loved the feeling of when he would pull me into his lap, his strong arms wrapping around me. The way he held me at night, like I was the only thing that mattered in the world-- it was a beautiful feeling. It was crazy to hear the stories of the hot-headed boy, because with me he wasn’t like that. He was patient, kind, and loving to no end. Did he have his moments where his temper would flare up? Of course. Everyone does, but I tried to help him get to where he wanted his temper to be. We worked on new ways to cope, we made a lot of progress for him. 

He was everything you could ask for in a guy, he was nothing Embry warned me about. Everyone noticed that Paul had softened immensely, he was calmed down. He was “whipped” according to the guys, which I didn’t stop him from kicking Jacob’s ass for that one. 

“Damn, Paul. (Y/N) trained you well.” Quil teases, only to be pulled into a headlock.

Our first kiss was sweet, it was gentle. Paul’s large hands held my face like he was holding the most fragile thing in the world. He treated me like a princess. 

“Wanna go get lunch before we hang out with everyone? I’m buying.” He offers. 

“Sure, but you’re not buying my lunch.” I giggle over the phone. 

“Why not? It’ll be a date.” He chimes. 

“I don’t know... What’s in it for me?” 

“Uh, going on a date with the hottest and sweetest guy in all of La Push.” 

“Oh, Jacob’s taking me on a date?” I tease, knowing that would drive him a little nuts. 

“You’re gonna be the death of me, (Y/N) (Y/L/N).” He chuckles into the phone. 

“I just might be, when’re you picking me up, Lahote?” I giggle. 

“I’m actually outside already. Surprise.” 

So we went out to lunch, and it was really fun. It always was a fun time with Paul. Going to hang out with the guys was great, though something was off with Jared. He played it off, continuing to tease Paul and I. 

Embry grew to support Paul and I, though he told me he was my second pair of eyes. He was watching Paul like a hawk, hoping he wouldn’t break my fragile heart. 

But when Jared got sick with mono and stopped coming around, I had to be there for him. He was beyond hurt when he saw Jared hanging out with Sam Uley. Why would he up and leave the group? No explanation, nothing. Jared avoided all of us like the plague.

Paul was devastated. That was his best friend, how could Jared lie to him? How could he ditch him like it was nothing?

The issue was, is that Paul had a hard time expressing his emotions. Even though he was sad about the situation, he grew to be angry. He would huff and puff, pacing the room, yelling about how Jared was being an asshole and how he had no idea what to do. 

It was fine, really. You knew that he was going through the ringer and he still treated you like a princess. 

“I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t even realize how much I was yelling.” He would apologize, walking over to you sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting for him to calm down after your attempts to do so were futile. 

“I understand, you’re going through a rough time right now. But I’m here for you.” I smile, pressing a kiss to his lips. 

“I love you.” He presses his forehead against mine.

“I love you, too.” 

Chills ran up my spine, I had felt butterflies like never before. Paul gave me feelings I never knew existed.  

But soon, he grew feverish. His skin was burning hot and he grew testy. He snapped at everyone, and seemingly for the littlest of things. I thought it was strange, as this was a side of Paul I had never seen. We had to leave Jake’s one night, as he grew incredibly protective over me... almost animalistic. He almost lost it on Quil when he started play fighting with me, I just took him out of there, leaving the guys in the garage. I was met with concerned eyes all around, but I knew Paul wouldn’t hurt me... I just had no idea what had gotten into him. 

He held onto me like his life depended on it. 

“I’m scared, (Y/N).” He whispered into my neck. 

“Why Paul?” 

“Jared and Sam... they look like they’re waiting for me. I can’t stand it-- they’re hovering over me all the time. I can’t deal with it.” He huffs. 

His feverish skin almost burning mine, just as it had been the last few days. 

“I’m sorry Paul, maybe try to avoid them?” I offer up my advice, but it met with a mere sigh from his lips. 

“They keep telling me I have to break away from everyone. That I’ll have to leave the friend group, that I’ll have to leave you. They’re lucky I didn’t kick their asses.” He huffs. 

His words shocked me, they left me speechless. Why would they be saying that?

“Why would they say that?” 

“Hell if I knew. I just ran out of there before I punched someone. I know you don’t like when I hit people.” He chuckles.

“I’d rather you didn’t.” I smirk.

But I couldn’t shake his words, I didn’t understand why they wanted him? Why they wanted him to cut us all off? 

He soon fell asleep while I rubbed circles into his back, trying to soothe him once again. I heard my phone go off on the table next to me. 

It was Embry asking if I was okay, to which I told him yeah. He didn’t need to know the worries plaguing my brain. 

But the next few days, Paul got sicker. He started changing before my eyes, growing insanely fast. His body temperature continued to climb. He told me that Sam and Jared wouldn’t leave him alone, but he was only getting angrier at them and holding onto me tighter. 

“They keep saying they don’t want me to hurt you.” He would sigh, his face visibly distressed. 

And then told me that I couldn’t see him for a while. He cut off all the guys completely, and I hadn’t heard from him since; he wasn’t even answering my texts. 

Embry was worried sick about me, despite everyone being upset at Paul’s sudden change and departure from our lives. He would come and check up on me, absolutely stunned to see the shifting moods I had. 

One minute, I was fine and 110% certain that Paul wouldn’t up and leave with no warning, and the next I was a blubbering mess. Embry did his best to make sure that I wasn’t left alone for too long, as he was afraid I would become the next comatose Bella Swan. I mean, kudos to him for caring but that wouldn’t happen. Or maybe just yet, as the longer Paul was gone the less I seemed to care about anything else. It just felt like a part of me was gone, like the puzzle piece fitting my heart together was missing. 

So a few days later, I made some of his favorite soup and made my way over to his house. 

I knocked on the door, but there was no answer. It was locked so I couldn’t let myself in, but I knew where Paul’s bedroom window was. I peeked through and saw him peacefully sprawled out on his bed, the sight bringing both relief and a smile to my face. But then I heard some whooping noises from the back of his house, causing me to investigate. 

I look and see none other than the infamous Sam Uley and Jared Cameron, he looked very different since the last time I had saw him. It felt like forever ago since that night. 

“(Y/N), what’re you doing here?” Sam asks with a concerned tone. 

“I needed to see Paul.” I demand.

“Go home, (Y/N). He doesn’t want you to come around anymore, he doesn’t want to be with you anymore.” Jared looks deep into my eyes, his words punching me in the gut. 

His eyes were hard, as were his features, but I knew he was full of shit. But the words still hurt for just a second. For just a second.

“What the hell are you guys doing to him?” I look at them with eyes set to kill. 

“What? What did he tell you?” Jared asks, eyes widening with concern. 

“Calm down.” Sam urges, putting a hand out in front of Jared. 

“He won’t tell me anything anymore.” I hiss. “But before he stopped answering me he was so afraid of you guys! Always following him around, telling him what to do. Telling him to stay away before he hurts me! Paul would never hurt me, asshole!” 

I was fuming now, but I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t stop myself. Paul was a tough guy, nothing really broke him like their warnings and constant following did. The sudden changes he was experiencing, he had no idea of what to make of it as he was given no answers. 

“I watched him change in front of my very eyes, this is beyond some bullshit about him wanting to leave me, Jared. This is not normal.” I stomp my way over to them. 

“(Y/N), stay back.” Sam’s hand gestures up to me. “Jared, calm down.” 

“Sam, don’t. I’m done with this, I want my boyfriend back. Jared, what the hell got into you, too?” I raise my voice at him, causing him to flinch. 

“Hello? Earth to Jared Cameron? What’s your deal now, asshole?” I yell again, poking his bare chest. 

But that’s when rage took over Jared’s body. Something I had never seen before. Jared was always goofy, so nice. I had really only seen Paul so angry, and even then-- this was a different level. 

“(Y/N), move back now.” Sam yells. 

This time, I listened. I took some hesitant steps back, almost tripping over my own feet. 

Jared’s body was almost vibrating at this point, that’s how fast it was shaking. I just stared in awe, Sam’s voice was booming, though. 

“(Y/N), move back!” He yells again. 

I bring myself to take a few more steps back, but this time I did trip over my feet.

Jared suddenly moved like he was bursting out of his own skin, and in some way he did. Sam pushed him back to create some more distance, but overall in the end-- Jared turned into an enormous wolf. An enormous wolf that snarled at me, but overall didn’t do anything to hurt me. 

“What the hell?” I blink my eyes, before running towards Paul house. 

That’s when I see Paul running towards the situation. 

“Paul, run!” I say, trying to grab a hold onto him, but he gently, but very quickly, shook me off. 

He too, burst out of his own skin, turning into a giant wolf. 

“What?” I whisper to myself.

I watch as Paul jumps onto Jared, listening to their snarls and growling. I stared astonished, as Sam looks over at me with sympathetic eyes. 

After a few moments, Sam orders them to stop. And they did, they walked into the woods and came out with some jean shorts on. 

“Come here.” Sam says, helping me off the ground. 

“Is this... is this what was going on?” I breathe out.

“Yeah, you’re gonna learn a lot today.” He sighs, clearly unhappy about me knowing. 

“I’m sorry.” Jared exhales. “It’s hard to control your anger when this starts, and then I had to lie and everything. I’m just sorry.” He smiles softly. 

“All good, understood now.” I smirk. 

Though I was still uneasy. What did all this mean?

“Paul?” I merely whisper, looking up at his face. 

He had grown a lot, got even more muscular since I had last seen him. But he refused to meet my gaze. 

“Paul, please look at me.” I beg, reaching out to grab his forearm.

He hesitates, almost afraid to. 

“Paul if you think I’m afraid of you, I’m not. Please look at me.” My pleading voice almost cracking. 

I needed to see those deep brown eyes I had loved so much. The ones that brought me endless joy, endless love. But he wouldn’t budge. 

“That’s not what I’m afraid of right now.” He chuckles sadly. 

He was still looking over my head, refusing to meet my gaze.

 “You owe it to the both of you to figure it out, Paul.” Sam nods. 

“What? What’re you talking about.” I turn to Sam. 

But as I turn my head to look back at Paul, I finally caught his gaze. A small smile crept on his face, until our eyes met. 

That’s when his jaw fell slack, his face completely softened. It was like he was stuck in a daze of sorts. 

But what I felt was good. I felt like the world had stopped spinning, I felt like Sam and Jared were gone, it was only Paul and I. I couldn’t tear my eyes away as this overwhelmingly great feeling pressurized around my entire body. This was something far more intense than what Paul and I usually had felt, and even before I thought we had intense feelings. 

No, this was different. 

I had no idea how to even stand anymore, I felt like my knees were going to give out.

“Finally, some good news.” Jared huffs, grabbing both of us out of our trance. 

“Okay, please explain things.” I look back to Paul. 

“Okay.” He breathes a sigh of relief, before he pulls me into a rib crushing hug, spinning me around. 

I felt the air leave my lungs, this actually hurt. He sometimes accidentally hugged me too hard, but this was surreal. 

My breath hitched as I whimpered out and “ow” which caused Paul to quickly let go, profusely apologizing. 

“Sorry, I forget my own strength. Still not completely used to it.” 

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

“Okay, so let me get this straight. Vampires run rampant through Forks and the rest of the Olympic Peninsula? Right, so that’s what made you guys phase. And then you can’t be around people for a while because it’s an enormous secret that only the pack and their imprints can know. And Paul imprinted on me, but I still don’t know what that exactly means, but we can go over that. But then, you guys protect everyone from said vampires and destroy them. Now you’re super warm and strong and the rest of the group you expect to join soon? Because you all have it in your blood?” I ask, looking at Sam.

“Well, you seem to really listen. But yes, It’s likely that Quil and Jacob will, we don’t know so much about Embry but it’s possible. Has he been acting strange?” Sam raises an eyebrow. 

“He texted me about a fever earlier, but he’s been normal enough.” 

“Well, you suddenly disappearing might set him off.” Jared chuckles. 

“What? I can’t see him anymore?” 

“Not until he phases, any of them. The secret is important.” Sam looks at me with empathetic eyes, Paul’s hand immediately resting on my lower back. 

“I have to disappear out of my best friends’ lives? I don’t even phase!” 

“It doesn’t matter, it’s too much of a risk right now. Over time, we’ll see what happens.” 

My heart sank, how would they forgive me for disappearing indefinitely? For blowing them off? I was growing anxious at the thought. 

“They’ll forgive you when they understand, it just takes time.” Sam nods. 

“Okay.” I whisper. 

“Alright, Paul. Explain imprinting.” Jared smirks, looking over at us. 

“Right now?” Paul looks at Sam, but Sam only nods his head, signaling for him to begin explaining. 

“Paul? Just talk to me, we always talk about anything and everything.” I lay my hand on his comfortingly. 

He seemingly melted at my touch, just as always.

“Well, the thing is, it’s not our choice. And I want you to hear me out before you say anything, please.” 

“Of course.” I grew nervous at his words, but I knew that was nervous, too.

“Well, so it happens to some of us, not all of us get so ‘lucky,’ if you will. It happens when you see a certain person for the first time after you phase. When you look into their eyes, it’s just... it’s pure bliss. You just know, you know it’s your soulmate. But, that doesn’t mean romantic, it could be platonic. In reality, it’s up to them. But for us, you’d do anything, be anything for them. A friend, protector, a lover. We just... we need to be near them. I need to be near you, and I always did, even before all of this complicated shit. I was always protective, but I can’t imagine I’ll ease up, it’ll probably get worse so I’m sorry in advance, but overall, I want you to know that you hold the reigns.” He softly smiles, looking into my eyes with a pleading look.

“Oh, I see.” I murmur, looking down at my hand for a second, trying to process the situation. 

His face fell, and it looked like someone punched him in the gut, Jared and Sam grew a bit worried. 

“Wait, that wasn’t me rejecting you. I’m just... I’m thinking. It’s just a lot to take in. I love you, more than anything. I’m glad it was me and not someone else, I am. As long as you’re happy about that. But I just need to understand it. I feel a physical pull to you, so I feel it, too.” I smile softly, thinking about when he refused to look into my eyes. 

“I’m very happy that it was you.” He grabs onto my hand.

“So why didn’t you want to look into my eyes?” I mumble. 

“Because I didn’t want to bare the thought of it not happening with you, though I don’t think I could change anything about us, ever. Imprint or not, (Y/N), you’re stuck with me.” He chuckled. “But only if you want me.” 

“Of course I want you.” I nudge his shoulder. 

After that, it was just playing the waiting game, waiting for my best friends to phase, too. I was left with so many calls and texts I couldn’t answer. Embry showing up to my house, knocking to no avail. Leaving, sadness deep in his eyes. Though, he eventually became angry. I knew he was going to phase soon, I watched from afar how he was growing more hostile, and how he was changing physically. Soon, I’d have my best friend back. 

Paul was right, he grew more protective, more worried about my every move. It was clear to us all that he was more protective than Sam and Jared were over Emily and Kim. It was easier to understand everything with Kim and Emily being apart of this all, as they knew where I was coming from. 

But, it was the waiting game that was killing me. Thankfully, Paul was around to pick up the pieces after leaving my best friends behind, no notice given. He held me when I grew sad, feeling guilty for having to leave their lives. 

Paul was unwavering, loving me endlessly.  __________________________________ Word Count: 4796

[ohtheseboysilove]

Ghost from the past VII [Roger Taylor x F!Reader]

Words : 3, 300 K +

Warnings : language, angsty angst 

Summary :  Reader and Roger are in love and happy. Until Ally, first love and ex-girlfriend of Roger come back after years of silence, bringing chaos in their perfect life.

Note : hahaha beginning of the end...or not ? Still not sure, together or not together ? Don’t know yet but the finish line of this story is really close ! I still adore reading your fantastic messages and comments, so please don’t stop, you’re the best lovies xx (please don’t hate me for this chapter haha ily guys)

🌼Requests are open 🌼  ☀ Masterlist ☀

@/ none of these gifs are mine xx

The two following weeks were tense. And sad. Seth still refusing to see his father and Roger was completely devastated. Both of you didn’t understand why suddenly the little boy was so angry about the situation, he did complain in the past but never at the point of ignoring his dad. It was five years old, after all, you couldn’t always understand how their little brains works. The drummer was an empty shell, trying his best to gain back the attention of his son but, sadly, he was as stubborn as his father.

“Baby, I made breakfast. You want some?” You asked sweetly as he entered the kitchen, an empty cup of tea in his hand.

“I’m alright, thank you darling” He sounded off all the time, like he wasn’t really here. You knew his mind was thinking about a solution to see Seth, Ally was refusing him any visit, claiming that the little boy didn’t want to see him. It was true, Brian paid them a visit to be sure she wasn’t making things worse but Seth was still angry toward his father. He was only five years old but he already understood that Roger was the reason of his mum’ sadness. “Oh and I cancel our trip to Vegas...I’m not in the mood to partying, I hope your understand my love” The blond gave you an apologetic smile, kissing lightly your hairs.

Before you could replied he was already gone. Probably to Ally’s place, desperate to talk to is little boy. You felt exhausted, the situation was awful and, a part of it was your fault, not directly but still. Your presence was complicating things for Roger and Ally, the thought of leaving was more and more present in your mind, heavier at every tears on the drummer’s face.

It wasn’t only Seth, even if he was a big part of this painful idea but it several little things that made you think it was maybe for the best. The fact that Ally would never stop trying to have Roger back ; Also that Freddie, bandmate and best friend of the blond was definitely on her side ; Roger’s pain to miss the daily life of his son ; His past with Ally, always in the back of your mind ; The number of people who thought their were together whenever there are with Seth ; The gossip magazines which were dragging you in the mud, calling you awful name for breaking a family ;

There were so many warnings, you avoided them all but after six months of this situation, you were tired. Maybe it was really time for you to go after all. You picked the phone and called the man who, you know, would be totally honest with you about this thought of leaving.

“Hey Fred, it’s (Y/N)...do you think we could talk face to face someday ?”

***********************************************************************************

Freddie organised a dinner at his place two days later and invited everyone, giving a chance to Roger to see his son and maybe fix the problem. You didn’t say anything to the drummer for now, you weren’t sure of what you will do, he didn’t notice your sadness, drowning in his own. You supported him the best you could and he told you how grateful he was for that but you couldn’t stand him so sorrowful, it wasn’t a healthy situation. Seth barely spoke two words to his dad, adding weight in your decision to take a break with the drummer, maybe not a total break up but some time to think about what was the best for the future.

At the end of the dinner as everyone was saying goodbye, Freddie asked to talk to you.

"I don’t think it’s a good idea Fred" Roger immediately stepped in front of you, in a protective gesture. "You said enough last time” You stayed quiet, half hide by the drummer’s frame, relived that he took your defence but also guilty to talk about leaving him behind his back.

Freddie sighed awkwardly and scratched his neck.

"Listen, I just want to apologise to your lady. Can I spoke to her or you’re gonna bit me if I come too close ?" 

Roger raised an eyebrow, the singer wasn’t the type to apologise so he was rather surprised. The blond looked at you interrogatively and you squeezed his arm, a reassuring smile on your face. 

"I will wait for you in the living-room” He pressed a kiss on your forehead and threw a last warning glare to Fred before waving a last goodbye to the others who were leaving.

Freddie and you walked in his giant but beautiful garden and he sat on one of the bench, gesturing you to do the same, Paul stood behind him, his hand on his shoulder. The singer turned and asked him to leave which he did, reluctantly. 

"First of all, (Y/N), I’m really sorry for my behaviour since Ally came back, I had been completely awful to you and I dearly regretted it" You nodded slowly, feeling a bit uncomfortable. "I think I own you an explanation for my mean words to you with Ally around"

“I think I already know the answer Fred. You want them back together” You murmured with sadness, it was never pleasant to feel not wanted. “I got it, she was...is your best friend and she still in love with Roger, I know that”

"It’s not against you, I swear” Freddie put his hand on top of yours. “I can’t...I can’t picture Roger with someone else than Ally. I did it when she left and you arrived but...but now she is back with Seth, I just think it’s gonna happen anyway”

"I think you’re right. I feel like I don’t belong in this group since she is back, or with Roger. I feel like I’m just in their way, ya know ?" He shifted uncomfortably in his seat but nodded sadly. “I think I should take a break with Roger. Maybe giving him the opportunity to see if he could...go back with Ally and Seth. I owned him that after all he did for me, I just want him to be happy. What do you think Fred ?” You asked with a weak voice, you were terrified of his answer.

Freddie moved his hand away and rubbed his eyes before lighting a cigarette.

"I think it’s the right thing to do”

He could have punched you right in the stomach it wouldn’t have hurt as much as his words just did.

"Ye–yeah ?" You blinked furiously as you felt your eyes watering.

"You asked me to be totally honest, I’m being honest” He took a quick puff, shaking his head. "I’m putting my friendship with Ally completely aside alright ? I speak as Roger’s friend and yours, even if I didn’t act like a friend these past months. But for your sake and them...a break could help all of you to see in this mess”

Your bit your trembling lower lips to prevent any tears to spill as your stomach was twisted painfully. 

"I love him so much Freddie" You replied with a shaky voice. "But I feel like I’m not enough anymore" He stayed silent, his eyes filled with guilt, he was causing you pain and it hurt him too.

"I know you do, you wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t for him. Talk to me (Y/N), it’s not my decision, it’s your, I can only you give you my feeling about it” You chocked a pathetic sob as he replied to you, sadness covering his face.

"I...I’m just exhausted to feel like I have to fight for him, for our future, all the time" You replied, your voice cracking under the mix of emotion rolling through your system. “It’s not his fault, I know he love me but there so many things which went wrong since Ally came back, I don’t know if I can handle all of this during years, Fred”

"Darling, you situation is...fucking shitty. I can’t imagine how hard it had been for you, I should had talk to you rather than be a little bitch” A noise between a sob and a laugh fell from your lips as you shook your head, sharing a glance with Freddie, both of you smiling sadly. “Roger love you, I know he does, it’s obvious. This is so unfair, I...I love you okay ? I’m not trying to be mean but he could...eventually live without you, he couldn’t do that with Seth, it’s his son, he is his priority. And I do think that...even if he said he don’t love Ally anymore, they could go back together for Seth and be a happy family”

He wiped a tear from the corner of his eye, he wasn’t insensitive to your state but he was sure to do the right thing.

You couldn’t contain your watering eyes anymore, streams of salty tears soaking your burning cheeks. After Ally, now there was Freddie who was also convinced that Roger will go back to her eventually. You felt completely helpless, seeing your future with the man who, you were sure, was the love of your life slipping through your fingers. 

"That what I thought too” You whispered weakly, your gaze staring intensely at your engagement ring like it would disappear at any moment. 

"Maybe we’re wrong but for both of you, giving him the chance to see how life would be with Ally and Seth could be a good thing. And I know you can’t build a life with all the doubts you have, it’s not fair for you either”

“You’re right. I will...I will speak to Roger. Explain the situation and then...we will see” You slowly stood up and wiped away your tears and drooling nose. “Thank you for your honesty. I knew John and Brian would just say to stay with him no matter what”

“If he decide to stay with you (Y/N), I will be happy for the both of you, you know ? I regretted my horrible comportment toward you, I don’t know why I acted like this. I think I wanted to scare you away for Ally but it was really stupid, I’m sorry again darling” He opened his arms timidly and you gave him a thigh hug, every inches of your body felt like a tone of brick at the sadness of what became your life.

“It’s alright Fred, we all do mistakes. I’m not rancorous” You smiled through your tears and sighed deeply, just the though of saying Roger in few minutes made you sick.

“And (Y/N)” You turned around and Freddie had a serious face, unusual from him. “You don’t have to be ashamed about how you feel about the situation, most of people would have ran away with all the shit which happened to you. You’re not weak to ask for a break, you’re just human. I know I couldn’t handle a situation like yours, I think you very brave”

A wave of warmth spread around your chest at his words and you smiled softly before leaving without another word. You would tell Roger that you and Freddie had teary apologies, reason for your rather destroyed and broken appearance. It wasn’t even a lie but only half of the truth.

*****************************************************************************************

After you made the decision to take a break with Roger, you decided to tell him at the end of the week. You already had everything plan, you would left during the three months of summer, going in somewhere you always wanted to visit. This absence would give all the time for Roger and Ally to reconnect...or not. And you also deeply needed this time alone. These past months had been so hard and intense for you, it was vital to take some rest away from this chaos that became your life. The fears, the cries, the pain...you wanted to forget all of this and saw how you would experience this break from London and the craziness.

You spent this week literally glued to your fiancé, well the most you can. Every kisses, every caresses, every intimate touches were feeling like they were the last one and maybe it would be.

It was friday night and you were leaving tomorrow, you needed to tell him. Tonight.

“Someone is being very greedy these past days” Roger murmured as you forced him to take his tee-shirt off as soon as he put a step inside your flat, kissing every inch you could reach of him.

“Roger, I need you” He fell on the sofa and grabbed your hips, putting you on his lap as he gently sucked onto your neck a love bite. “Please, baby, want you now” You whined as you fought with his belt, your fingers shaking as you tried to put aside what you were supposed to tell him.

“Alright, needy girl, why are you in a such hurry ? I’m not going anywhere” The drummer captured your lips for a deep and hot kiss, hands flying to your bottom, squeezing it playfully. “Are you going somewhere or what ?” He joked as your hands explored his bare torso, trying to remember how beautiful he looked.

You stopped every movements at his words, looking at him like a deer caught in the headlight.

“What ?” He asked when you didn’t replied to his kiss. “What’s wrong ?” You moved away from his thighs and sat next to him, feeling already overwhelmed with the conversation that would follow.

“Roger, I need to tell you something” The blond frowned at your serious tone and put a hand on your knee, rubbing it gently. “I...I thought about it a lot and I– I think we...we should take a break” You bit harshly your lower lip to calm down your nerves as the drummer looked at you like you were crazy.

“W–what ? What are you talking about ? It’s...it is because I pushed back the wedding ? We can get married tomorrow if you want, I–“ The sadness and panic on his face crushed your heart but you were sure it was the good thing to do.

“It’s not because of our wedding Roger, I just think...I feel like I’m in the way between you and Ally and it’s exhausting. Always wondering if you’re really done with her or not” You murmured before sniffled silently, you couldn’t look at him.

“Baby, I already told you a million time that I love you, fucking hell ! I don’t give a shit about Ally, we’re done !” He grabbed your hands, pressing them with fear. “You can’t just decided to both of us to take a break (Y/N), I won’t let you go, do you hear me ?” His voice was trembling but his eyes were filled with determination.

“Roger listen, I’m not breaking up with you okay ? I...I need time to think about all of it…I need to think if I can bear with a life like the past six months” His big baby blue eyes were shinning with tears as he slowly understood what you meant. “I love you, more than anyone but I can’t marry you if I’m not sure if we have a future or not. Seth don’t speak to you anymore and I feel like it’s my fault, because you’re with me and not with his mum. And maybe if I wasn’t here, you would be with her instead, being a happy family”

You rubbed your eyes, chasing the tears away because if you started crying now you wouldn’t finish this conversation.

“I...I don’t know what you want from me (Y/N), how can I convince you that I will never go back with Ally ?” You glanced at his thumb, as usual it was caressing your beautiful ring. The gesture made your heart sank. “Tell me”

“I’m leaving tomorrow for all summer, I have a flight in the morning” He gasped loudly, the feeling of treason covering his face, guilt was all over yours. “I want you to spend your time with your son and Ally, see if there still something between you two. I don’t want you to marry and then one day you regretted it because you still have feelings for her” You wiped away a tear from Roger’s cheek, it was even harder that you though. “I’m not saying we are over, okay ? I think it’s the best if both of us take some time apart, deciding what we want to do with the situation. I would be sad if you choose to go back with Ally but I won’t be mad, I want to give us a chance to be completely sure”

“I don’t need time away from you (Y/N), I know I want you, please don’t do that” He murmured with a broken voice and couldn’t contain the tears to roll on your face.

“You’re saying that because we’re always together, maybe deep inside you, feelings for Ally are still there and I don’t…I can’t continue to live with this fear, I’m so afraid that in the end, you would go with Ally and Seth and I will be all alone...” He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and you let your head fell on his chest, soaking his bare chest. “I need a break from all this pain Roger”

“I didn’t know you were feeling like that baby, I’m sorry” He croaked, his own body shaking with silent cries. “Do whatever you need to feel better, okay ? If...if you want me to give another try with Ally to be sure of my feelings, I will do it for you”

“Promise you will to do it for real ? Not just pretend. Use this time with Ally and Seth, as a family and if something with Ally happen, at least I would have my answer” You murmured with a weak voice as he nodded slowly, wiping his red nose. “I want you to forget about me during these three months and only focused on what make you the happier. No phone calls, just pretend I don’t exist”

He closed his eyes momently like if your words were painfully hitting him.

“If it what’s you want (Y/N)” He picked up his clothes and slowly stood up, sliding his tee-shirt over his head. “I’m sorry for these past months, how hard it had been for you but I hope our love would be enough to make you come back home” He cupped your wet and burning cheeks, pressing a painfully sad kiss on your lips, tasting salty tears and goodbye. “I love you”

“I love you too Roger” You replied in a whisper, he grabbed his keys and jacket before disappearing behind the door, the silent of the flat echoing through your ears.

You wiped your face with your top and took a deep sigh, even if you felt crushing with sadness and guilt to have caused pain to the drummer, your heart felt a bit lighter. Relieve flooding through your veins, you did it, it was hard and maybe you will regret it if Roger stayed with Ally but at least all your doubts will be gone. Whatever he or you chose to do, it would be for the best.

You made your way to your room and started packing clothes in the big backpack you bought for the occasion. You had decide to not stay in the same place but rather travelled between New Zealand and New Caledonia, two countries you wanted to deeply visit since forever, it was your chance. You will use your saving money and stayed in cheap hotels, improvising when it would be needed. The most important was that you will clear your mind and really think about what you wanted for your future.

With or Without Roger.

**********************************************************************************

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[betsynagler]

I steal pens.

I steal pens.

I'm not entirely sure when I started doing it, but I'm pretty sure it happened at a hotel. Of course, the pens in hotels are kind of meant to be taken, so it’s not really “stealing,” they're free advertising because they have the name of the hotel on them. Plus, they're never very good pens to begin with, they are always your most basic ballpoint, plus they obviously come from some place that uses the cheapest plastic and smallest inkwells, because, again, they're not so much meant to be writing implements as tiny, disposable billboards. So I have never really felt that bad about taking them home and using them as long as they last, which, considering how seldom I need to hand-write anything these days, can be quite a while. But this is why, if you ever meet me, and you ask to borrow a pen, there’s an excellent chance you’ll get one from a Hampton Inn.

But I will occasionally also take pens from other places. Like if I'm at work on a commercial, and they have a box of pens there for us to fill out our timecards, and I recently lost the one I keep in my bag, maybe I just won’t…give this one back. Why does this seem okay to me? Well, they have a whole box, I know they’re not going to need them all. I also know that the people out of whose pocket the pen money has come are not the people I’m working with on the day, nearly all of whom are freelancers of one sort or another — so basically, nobody I meet on job is going to be hurt if I take the pen. The only entity you could say is being “hurt” is the production company that hired us all for that job, but they can generally afford to lose a 50¢, or 30¢, or 8¢ pen, depending how large the bulk office supply box they bought is — and it’s always a bulk office supply box, which also shows the scale of spending on what we do, that they will just buy a whole box of pens for one two-day job. Money is not really an object for these companies the way it is for me, because even when they plead poverty and beg us to work for lower rates and nickel-and-dime us on rentals and understaff the camera department, they nearly always can somehow afford to buy rafts of Starbucks coffees and gourmet donuts for the clients. On top of that, I see the people who do own these companies on set sometimes, when they show up for half an hour to shake hands and then drive off in their Porsches or Lexi (yes, they’re always midlife-crisis-aged men), and there definitely seems to be something disproportionate there in terms of how much they make and how much my crew colleagues and I make, and who’s doing all the work. So in some small way, I feel like I’m redressing a huge imbalance between me and the 1%; I’m not taking pens from people, I’m taking them from The Man. And when I take pens from other places — I’m at a store and someone asks me to do a survey and I need a pen so I just don’t give it back, or I find one someone dropped on set and I don’t try to figure out who dropped it and return it, I just pocket the thing — I have a similar list of justifications for why it’s okay to just take them. And if those don’t work, I can always tell myself, It’s just a pen.

When I was younger, and I had less stuff, I took more stuff, to the point that some might say it crossed a line into actual theft. In my 20s, when I worked in an office part-time, I would take home office supplies, not just pens but Post-It notes, sometimes even entire legal pads. Again, I knew the people who owned these companies, and they had cars with drivers and private bathrooms with phones built in their offices (something in the pre-cell phone era that said you thought your time was so valuable you couldn’t even stop working to take a shit), so I was pretty sure they wouldn’t care about me taking this stuff, and if they were the kind of stingy assholes who would, they deserved to lose office supplies. Plus, everyone else who worked there did it, as has everyone else who’s ever worked in an office. And this last was also the reasoning behind why I felt it was okay to take glasses from bars as “souvenirs,” especially when my roommates and I needed glasses: it was just something that we all did back then, when we weren’t enough money to buy the things we needed. Our other “stemware” was cups that came free with drinks at sports or holiday events, and our furniture was stuff we found on the street and milk crates covered in fabric, as if that made them look less like milk crates. Once you’re taking things from somewhere that’s not your place of work, though, you can't pretend they're some sort of salary bonus as justification. Like, why did we consider it okay to steal from service establishments, but not okay to shoplift the same items from stores? Was it a calculation that lost or broken glasses are just a cost of doing business at a bar? Was it just because we thought we wouldn't get caught, or because if we did, we thought they’d let us off the hook because we were young women drunk on their alcohol? And was it just the souvenir factor that made it more likely that I’d take something from a bar in another state or country than at home, or was it because I was less likely to identify with the owners of a place so far away that I knew I’d probably never visit again, even though they were still human beings for whom that business was their livelihood? Basically, did we just think it was okay to do these things because we thought we could get away with it and not feel guilty?

I guess what I’m wondering is, how do we decide what’s wrong, and who we think it’s okay to hurt when we do it? And I believe the answer, unfortunate as it is, is that so much of this stuff is social. I stole what I stole when I was younger because other people did the same thing, and I took their justifications as my own (possibly adding on a few for good measure because I think too much). Now, when I take pens, there’s some part of my brain that considers not just how taking the pens will affect the party from whom I’m taking them, but how other people would react to it. On some level, knowing that I can sit here and tell you that I sometimes take pens that don’t belong to me, and that you probably won’t condemn or even think less of me for it, makes it okay for me to keep doing it. Is my conscience that flexible? Apparently so, and in case you haven’t noticed, yours probably is too. Humans are rationalization machines. Even if someone’s religion or spirituality or ethical code makes them “adhere” to some inflexible collection of words they believe someone (like God or the founding fathers or a group of likeminded pirates) gave them, they still seem to find the means to be extremely interpretive of those words when it comes to their own actions �� perhaps even more than the rest of us. Because once it becomes about obeying words rather than policing one’s own actions through truly considering for yourself what’s right and wrong, then it’s just a question of creatively manipulating the words, or overwriting them with other words from the same source, or just deciding that the fact your group has the words makes you better than everyone else, and therefore justified in doing whatever the hell you want. Which is called “exceptionalism,” and also, “hypocrisy.”

Often, what you think is good for you is going to hurt someone else, so at some point we all have to consider the line between our own personal priorities and theirs. In the United States, where we often prize individual liberty higher than anything — sometimes, indeed, in a very inflexible code type way (I’m looking at you conservative bloc of Supreme Court justices) — there are many instances where the “them” we think we’re more important than is our community, or country, or basically the rest of world, and that calculation that can lead to some pretty wackadoo results. Somehow, many Americans seem to think someone's individual right to own an AR-15 outweighs the right of everyone else not to be murdered with one. Others seem to think it's more important that individuals get to choose not to vaccinate their kids rather than ensuring dangerous diseases don't spread to everyone else’s kids. And overall, it seems like we don't see it as the responsibility of American society to reform people who commit crimes, or fix the problems that led to those crimes, for our collective betterment, instead choosing to place that responsibility on the shoulders of one person — as if they exist in a vacuum. Is America greater because of school shootings, measles outbreaks, and mass incarceration? Because I would say those are among the defining characteristics of our culture right now.

And if anything, it feels like the line is moving in the wrong direction. Having a president who can be counted upon to always put his needs and wants above everyone else’s is frightening, because his lack of giving a shit about anyone else and the lack of giving a shit of everyone in government who follows his lead has devastating consequences for policy. Add to that the social animal bit, so that their behavior and language sets the example for huge swaths of this country and the world about what is considered okay to do to other people, and the ramifications become even more horrifying. I see it so often in what their supporters say on Facebook and Twitter — matching each other so exactly it’s like one voice bouncing straight out of the Fox News echo chamber — that what Trump says isn’t nice but it’s honest; that what he’s doing is helping “America”; that we need to put “us” first and stop caring about “them.” But once you start to build the list of who the Right seem to consider a “them” that it’s okay to hurt for your own sake -- immigrants, muslims, prisoners, addicts, poor people, people of color, LGBTQ folks, women who want control of their bodies, Jews, “libtards” — you might start to realize how many of “us” are included in their “them,” because basically everyone’s “them” is somebody else’s “us.” I guess the question is, at what point does “us” just basically mean “me”? And what kind of a sad, selfish fucking person do you have to be to think that’s the way you want to live?

Look, I’m not perfect. I steal pens. If there’s a free seat on the subway, I’m going to go for it as long as I don’t have to push an elderly person or a child out of the way — I mean come on, caring about the world doesn’t mean I stop being a New Yorker! But I try to help people who are lost, I always tip at least 20%, and I don’t cut into the exit lane line off the BQE. I actually used to do that, until I realized I was being an asshole, and so I stopped — because even if we are great at justifying the bad things we do, doesn’t mean we have to keep doing them. We can do better. In the past couple of years, I’ve donated more money and time to good causes, made videos and podcasts to promote change or get people to think, and I really try to help and listen whenever I can, because I know that it’s more necessary. If the world is getting more selfish, then those of us who want to make it better have to work harder to be less so. I’m not a saint, or a buddhist, or even a vegan, but I pay attention to where I draw my lines. And I find it hard not to wonder how many people in this country right now simply keep telling themselves, It’s just a pen.

[sofeyhh]

BTS Private Boarding School Au

*based on the BTS Private Boarding School Profile I created

Part 7 / ?

Tick, tick, tick.

Jungkook grits his teeth at the sound of the clocking ticking. They’ve been at it for almost two hours now and the silent tension in the room was getting on his nerves. His brain was physically wiped out from all the complicated math formulae crammed in his ears. Even his ears felt like falling off after hearing Namjoon clicking his tongue for the hundredth time at another mistake he did.

Internally, Jungkook whines to himself. Oh, how he hated Math with all his life. While Namjoon was stabbing the book with his pen, his eyes wander over to the clock on the wall.

“Kook, this problem requires to ex-”

5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

“I’m done!” Jungkook wailed out as he flung his arms in the air.

His sudden outburst caused his older friend to jump back in his seat, the flailing arms almost knocking his glasses off. Namjoon rolls his eyes as he packs up the books. By the end of the first hour, he could already feel the kid losing focus, fidgeting every millisecond. A bubble of chatter got him to revert his attention to the opened door. In came Jin and Hoseok sucked in their deep conversation.

Jin looks up only to find that two of the members were present for their meeting. “Where’s the rest?” he asked with a disappointed frown.

Namjoon shrugs with a sigh. It wasn’t easy to wrangle their group for an impromptu meeting. They’d each be off running their less-than-important errands, leaving only Hoseok and Namjoon to entertain Jin’s nagging.

“What about Yoongi?” Jin asked Jungkook. “I need to pass him a scripted announcement about the survey in the magazine. I feel like it’s better if he makes it sound hyped up and trendy through his radio station.”

To that, Jungkook pinches his fingers together and brings it to his lips, imitating a joint. “Buzzed,” he says as he clicks his tongues.

The elder one lets out an exasperated sigh as he grumbles about how Yoongi was never committed into their group activities. Out of everyone else, Yoongi was definitely the number one culprit when it came to absence; with Jungkook coming in second. As if on time, the youngest boy heaves his backpack and runs for the door.

“Hey! Where are you going?! We haven’t even started the meeting!”

“Lacrosse practice!” he yells as he pounds down the hallway without looking back.

“For fuck's sake!” Jin bellowed to no one in general. “Are none of you interested in trying to save this club?!”

Hoseok calmly takes a seat, making sure not to make a sound as he drags the chair. Whenever Jin is angry, there’s nothing you can do other than to keep quiet and offer a listening ear to his upcoming rants. Lucky for him, Namjoon was there comforting the red-faced guy. While Jin was busy spewing his rage to Namjoon, Hoseok discreetly pulled out his phone and texted his buzzed out friend.

To Min Grampy: Ya! You’re hitting a fresh blunt without me?!

He waits a while for Yoongi’s reply, knowing this boy could take hours to reply a simple yes. Frankly, Hoseok was not a big fan of smoking weed. That was right up Jungkook and Taehyung’s alley, but not his. He’s done research on the long term effects of weed and all of them has been proven to lower your brain’s capacity. With a juicy ‘No thank you’, Hoseok leaves the weed smoking to his friends. He’s got too much at stake to fuck up his brain in the long run. But back to the point, he just wanted to find a reason to text Yoongi.

From Min Grampy: Mmm..thought that you’re not a big fan.

To Min Grampy: But is it not common courtesy to offer a friend illegal substances?

He was quite surprised that his reply came almost instantly. A small smile sneaked onto his lips without him realising. This flirty banter between the two has been going for a while now and Hoseok can’t put a label on it. Personally, he was still struggling with the idea that he could possibly be...gay. He tries to avoid it; sans his father’s constant chastising about the new fucked up society every time gay-pride marches airs on television. But Yoongi makes him feel a certain way. He made Hoseok want to snuggle up to him, leaving small kisses on his bare neck.

From Min Grampy: A friend, maybe. But you’re not just my friend Hobi. I know about your little research.

Yoongi’s words made his cheeks flush. It wasn’t just the adorable pet name but the way he said it as if he meant a lot to him. Hoseok bit his lips and was about to type out a reply when he receives another text.

From Min Grampy: But I’m extending the invitation to crash over at room 307, without the need to hit a blunt ;)

Hoseok’s heart quickens, making the insides of his tummy churn out of nervousness. The idea of him being in a locked room all alone with Yoongi made his head dizzy. In a split second, he wanders back to that sinful kiss they shared under the bleachers during one of Jungkook’s game. It was burning with curiosity, slow and hesitant with a hint of bitter cigarette aftertaste. In all honestly, it felt amazing. Yoongi’s lips hadn’t been too different from a girls’.

“Hobs!”

His head snaps up from the brazen text. He hadn’t realised that they’ve been calling out his name at least 5 times now. “Sorry, my parents were asking me about the fundraising gala,” he lied smoothly. “It’s going to be their first year that they won’t be attending.”

That was not a lie.

“Oh, right the gala!” Jin gasps, suddenly the idea of their club meeting skimmed down his priority list. He pouts, “It’s a shame your parents are not coming. I’ve seen the list of things being auctioned and shit, it’s going to get everyone placing bids.”

Hoseok gives a grim smile. He didn’t need a reminder that his parents are starting to not be able to afford idle things like that. His parents had been having trouble with their company’s funding and their future isn’t looking too bright for now. To save face, they opted out of the yearly fundraising gala and insisted their only son attended to cover their absence.

Which reminded him, To Min Grampy: Ah...I can’t :( My time has been booked by Tae and Jiminie. We’re heading out to shop for the gala.

“Oh this time, I insisted on having that sexy French strawberry champagne to be served at the gala. I mean, last year’s white wine was so dry, I don’t know what mother was thinking,” Jin chirped as he rolled his eyes.

The infamous annual fundraising gala was practically an essential in their community. It’s been hosted by Jin’s parents for the longest period and no one dares to break the streak because they do a damn good job at making everyone feel extra rich. Well, richer than they already are.

From Min Grampy: ugh…the gala...

He giggled at Yoongi’s disinterested reply.

“Hobs!” His name was called out for the sixth time that hour. He turns around to find Taehyung and Jimin entering the room.

Taehyung held his arms out wide and wiggled his chest. “Who’s ready for some Gucci shopping spree!” he singsonged. “My beautiful Porsche is ready for your ass.”

With the club meeting unofficially ending at the mercy of the gala, the group of friends started to talk about their outfits for that night. It may sound vain for a guy to put his sweat and tears into a suit he’s only donning for one night, but the gala was a literal fashion show. Young and old, anyone who attended, dressed up to the nine for it. It was all about impressing the non-existent judges.

To Min Grampy: Not attending this year?

From Min grampy: Like hell, I will. Not after what went down last year. Bastards.

It was full attendance during last year’s gala, save for Jimin. But it was the talk of the town for over half a year because of the brawl. It had started with a nosy, bratty kid spotting Yoongi making out with his sister by the fountain. That turned into an announcement broadcasted to the entire ballroom by the kid’s loudspeaker of a mouth. Followed by his father and eldest brother charging out to the open field, dragging Yoongi by the collar away from the girl. It ended with punches thrown, high-pitched screams and two bloody noses. Since then, Yoongi’s be on that family’s wanted list.

“I managed to get Alfred to come over for an appointment last minute,” Jin said smugly.

“You’ve got to be fucking with me!” Taehyung gasped in awe.

Alfred, also known as that young Italian man who fucks every housewife in this suburban town but also custom tailors every men’s suit. He has the touch of Midas when it came to designing suits and he would always be fully booked for the gala.

“Nope!” Jin beamed, popping the last syllable. “Father manage to pull a few strings and managed to squeeze in an appointment.”

“Well no shit,” Taehyung huffs. “I doubt Alfred can decline the fucking Governor.”

From Min Grampy: I’ll be at the beach that night. Once again, I’m extending a generous invitation if you want to join me.

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