#you've added 10 years to my total lifespan

[worldwhampion]

i saw your microscopic study on Apollo and thought i should ask if you could do something similar with -null-?

OMMGGGG YESSS ANON OFCCCC!!!! IN FACT i'VE ALREADY MADE ONE BUT IT'S MESSY AS HELL AND SPREAD OVER LIKE 5 DIFFERENT DOCUMENTS... OH BOY IT IS GONNA BE A LONG ONE

[stayxlix]

helloooo agaaain🩵🩵 don't be sorry for not responding right away!! ( I myself usually take a few days to answer so it'd be very wrong to argue on this.. ) I hope the weekend ended somehow smoothly🩵take all the time you want💗 Yes yes, I think I'd be dead if it weren't for them tbh bc as you said... it was a rollercoaster😅 they really are wonderful, and thaank you so much!!

YES YES I'M SO GLAD YOU LOVE THIS TROPE JUST AS MUCH AS I DO (is it really that surprising tho...) and no wonder screaming into your pillow has become a regular occurrence for you while writing the story bc if definitely has for me while reading it (in a good way though, I'm pretty sure all of my feelings about otde are positive — even through angsty parts bc then they make me realise how well you write emotions and how I feel like the story is swallowing my own emotions). Of course I'm excited!! Even though I always talk abt my appreciation for otde (and you) I still somehow feel like I haven't expressed it enough.. I'm ALWAYS gonna be excited for the next chapter, like actually no matter what. For me, I'm never worried that something you write wouldn't be a 100% amazing, bc, well, I've come to find out that you are such a good writer/author that it's like you could never go wrong💗 i definitely see why you are nervous, and I'm sure everyone else would say this, but there really isn't any need to be!! I really mean it when I say that your writing is a gift to witness, and even from an objective perspective, it's still just as amazing — you're consistent and portray everything so well that it almost doesn't feel like fiction anymore. I think anyone who'd say you don't write well would be talking shit🫶 aaand of course I will read it thoroughly! I'm so glad it makes you happy, and I honestly THRIVE from long fics so if you end up not splitting it up I will DEFINITELY AND I MEAN IT read in one sitting, I always do😭 I always get caught up in the story so I never realise how many paragraphs have passed already, and I just reallly love to spend my time on well written stories (ESPECUALLY OTDE OMFG I COULD ACTUALLY GO ON FOR HOURS AS TO WHY I LOVE IT SO MUCH AND WHAT EXACTLY IS SO GREAT ABOUT IT AND AND AJAJWJ) but don't feel any pressure!! If you feel like splitting the chapter, then do it! I'm sure all of us will read it regardless 🩵 I SCREAMED when i read that you're only halfway and it's already 12k words... I seriously love long long looooong chaps/fics so much it's unreal AND ESPECIALLY FROM YOU?!?? THAT IS A GIFT. I hope everything goes well with the trouble you're having!💗🩵 i'm sure it'll be amazing and I'm always here to support you fully and unconditionally💗

I'm so HAPPYYBJWJWJ that you're so glad about what I said!! I really wanna find all the compliments in the world and give them to you🩵😭 I love being sweet to you when I know it makes you happy, and I'm so very glad that my asks have the power to make you this happy (your answers literally make me weak in the knees pls help) I totally understand why readers are so important for the story and etc but you saying that YOU value MY opinion just made me SO FUCKING HAPPY I CANT. I'm pretty sure it added 10 years to my lifespan. Thank you for being so nice! I don't feel pressured at all but I do have to admit I'm a bit nervous haha😭 it's truly my pleasure to bring you such excitement through my asks and creations🫶 (you definitely bring me happiness, I always fight the urge to start jumping in excitement when I realise you've answered whjwjej)

I'M SO GLAD YOU LOVE THE MOODBOARD!!!! YOU SAYING THAT YOU WANT TO SHOW IT OFF MADE ME SO HAPPY YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND AJWJWNNENS (the fact that your irl friends don't know your blog is totally valid bc it's so same for me, even tho I don't post what I write😭😭) I'm so thrilled and literally every synonym to happy in existence that you feel the emotions that I tried to portray!!!! I feel the ominous feeling everytime I read otde, and since your world building is so thorough and well done, I knew exactly what i was looking for when making it!🩵 I've kinda associated green with otde now haha bc it just reminds me of it so much I can't even explain it😭 Like something about the story is just so green. The way you just said my love for this story is something you'll never forget has torn me to literal pieces😭 I don't know if I want to squeal and die from happiness or sob and die also from happiness 😭💗 you are also so special to me! I'm glad the offer still stands bc I have just SO MUCH to share so be ready🤭

THE RED VERSION IS GETTING CLOSE TO FINISH!! I CAN't SPOIL MUCH BUUUT RED IS SPICIER TAHT GREEN ON PINTEREST SO KEEP THAT IN MIND..🤭 I AM SO SO SO EXCITED TO SHARE IT WITH YOU THAT I AM ALSO BITING MY NAILS on THE EDGE OF MY SEAT JQJWJEJ

Thinking so much about the Vans thing is so valid bc literally same. Ever since I read you talking about them being in an alternate universe, in college and etc just made me think how they'd be in some Australian town and the tension would be just as strong as it is now. I once read something (i think it was a fanfic??) And it was about mc and love interest meeting in every single lifetime and falling in love more intensely every single time. Eternal soulmates but a bit twisted kind of beat🤭 and this reminds me of it so much!! Like them disliking each other at first but then then something happens and suddenly they're sneaking around bc they just NEED each other. Or a life where they have always been best friends (hear me out, long blond haired SURFER FELIX?!??!) , the kind that never separates — no matter how big of a damage they suffer from, they push through effortlessly bc that's just how long they've been so close to each other. The kind where all they've ever known has been each other (this is basically our fav trope, just in a different font🤭) and when they get older they realise that all they've ever needed and are going to need is each other, going through each other's firsts ans everything. Then another lifetime where Felix is a streetracer (thiking about 2019 world tour Felix specifically) and it's just full of unexplainable tension. She doesn't like how reckless he is and he dislikes how she judges too quick.. and yeah I could go on FOREVER. The cute twist is that mc always wears the red Vans and Felix always ends up with a tattoo that reminds him of her😭 I'M SO GLAD YOU AGREE THO?? i've been brainrot by this thought for so long now and i just KNOW that it fits otde Felix a little too much🤭 AND THE FLOWER BEING SOMETHING SHE DREW IS SO TRUE TBH I AM ALSO VERY WEAK RN. I'm so obsessed with this also bc I'm really into botany and flower language makes me so weak (especially when it's tattoos omfg)

YES YES YES. YOU ARE SO FUCKING RIGHT WITH THE HAIR TIE. like she just casually gives it to him one evening when they're out and then he suddenly never takes it off. Or if she says she prefers some kind of drink/food, catch him stacking his fridge full of it. The tattoo stuck with me so much because that's how he truly shows just how comitted he is, ESPECIALLY if it's her birth flower. Or a water lily bc it symbolizes purity of heart (or a primrose or a yarrow omfg I'm so weak rn) and it shows how she keeps him grounded even though he's nothing if not a mess. How she is the light he sees on a darkest night in the darkest corner. PLS YES WE DEFINITELY NEED TO DISCUSS THIS FURTHER. (Yes them in parallel universe/past life will now be my obsession)

I'M TELLING U OTDE FELIX GOES BORDERLINE FERAL WHEN HE SEES MC IN HIS CLOTHES. LIKE FIRST HE GOES INSANE SEEING SUCH THING AND THEN HE GOES EVEN MORE INSANE TRYING TO KEEP IT TOGETHER AND LIKE HE ISN'T SO OUT OF IT HE CAN BARELY STAND STILL.

My adoration for you just grew somehow even more right now after reading this paragraph😭😭 i'm so close to crying rn, you're so lovely I wish I could shower you with kisses rn 😭🩵 I'm so excited to share my creations with you, and I'm so unbelievably glad to be able to talk to you like this that it feels surreal. What you said makes me so warm and happy I could die honestly😭 Writing these asks is the light of day right after reading your answers and I wish I could just hug u so hard rn. Funny that you say that you would shower me with love if we knew each other BUT I WOULD LITERALLY GIVE IT BACK FO YOU 10× STRONGER OMFG I could never get sick of you tbh 😭💗 I feel so happy (how many time have I said this help me) to be able to tell you how I feel about you write, and it makes me even happier to know that you're glad to hear so!! Honestly it's a big possibility that we are halfway across the world from each other, but that it will honestly never stop me from giving you all the love I can virtually💗

So yes, I do admit that me adding The Eve to the playlist was kind of influence by the hyunlix dance (AND YES IT WAS SO RUDE??!? HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME ON A REGULAR CALM DAY ??!?!) but it was bc I finally got to listen to the whole song after knowing of its existence for quite the time and I realised it fits otde a bit well sooo🤭 BUT I NEED TO SHARE THIS BRAINROT WITH YOU so i have discovered this song called "half of my heart" by josh makazo (I HAVE ALREADY ADDED IT TO THE PLAYLIST BC HOLY SHIT) AND IT GIVES ME OTDE VIBES SO MUCH??? THIS IS EXACTLY HOW I FEEL WHEN THE TENSION COMES IN. THIS IS LITERALLY THEM IN EVERY SINGLE POSSIBLE UNIVERSE AND I WILL STAND BY THAT. I CANT DO THIS WHY IS THIS SONG SO THEM OMFG. (Another one that is a honorable mention is "Your face" by Wisp. THIS SONG IS SO THEM ALSO like this song feels like them looking at each other as rough rain falls on them and they're just fighting the urge to spit out all of their hidden secrets. It's them looking at each other as the wind blows their hair into their faces as they see all the hidden feelings so clearly in each other's faces. Raw emotions that aren't heard but seen. ALSO THEM IN EVERY UNIVERSE.) (But tbh I could go on like this abt every single song that I've added to the playlist — like bermuda locket is also literally them and again also and initiation and decode and AND YES ALL THE FUCKING SONGS ARE THEM I CANT) (like initiation is how i think our fav trope would sound if it were to be a song. also literally them help i cant stop)

this is soooo long but I just can't stop talking when it's you😭 i also have SO much to say to you, but know that I'm here to patiently read out every single one of your words thoroughly bc that is how much your answers and YOU mean to me, Alex🩵🩵 you also have the best rest of your week! I hope all is going well not only in writing sense but overall!!💗 thank you for responding and so kind words, I love you🩵 I truly wish you the best rest of your week💙 as always, stay safe and take care🩵

hi hi hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii🩵🩵🩵 i was so happy to see your ask when i woke up yesterday morning, ive honestly read it over and over again so many times since then🩵my weekend did end smoothly, and this week has also been pretty good so I’m thankful for that☺️ i hope yours is going well too. oh and YES, true friends can be lifesavers indeed. they make all the difference when life gets a little hectic, so im really glad you had yours by your side during your move.💕

i am most definitely obsessed with the trope just as much as you, as well as all of the little ones we have created and discussed throughout our conversations.🤭 they pop into my head at the most random times during the day and i always get so lost in thought daydreaming about them lol. omg and i’m so glad that your feelings about otde are all positive, writing it has certainly been a whirlwind of emotions for me lol and in the back of my mind im always hoping that it won’t ever be too angsty, you know??? idk, sometimes i just get so caught up in the emotions while writing and then i read it back and i’m like wtf i dont even know where that came from.😂 but BABE. the fact that you say i write emotions well means the absolute WORLD to me, because i have never been very good at expressing them in real life. like i have always always always struggled with this. it’s very frustrating to feel so many things and not always be able to express them well, but to have you point out the emotion in my writing as something you like about it means more than you could ever know.💕💕🥹

i don’t think ill ever feel like i’ve expressed my appreciation for you enough, i really don’t. i am ALWAYS going to be excited to see the little blue hearts in my inbox, because of the simple fact that your messages are such a safe place for me :) i feel so comfortable talking to you and my appreciation for you and the kindness you have shown me goes beyond words. i know i’ll never be able to show you just how much your support for my writing means. especially because im so new at it, and my confidence is still so fragile lol. so of course that’s why i get nervous, because nobody wants to disappoint, it would be so disheartening to lose people’s excitement you know? so that is why your continued reassurance and belief in my writing and this story just means everything to me. honestly i can’t think about it for too long or i really do get a bit emotional. but calling my writing a “gift to witness” touches my heart in so many ways😭😭💕and saying that  “it almost doesn’t feel like fiction anymore” is one of the most thoughtful and meaningful compliments i could ever hope to receive. ah im literally at a loss for words rn.😭😭😭😭😭

i swear i keep going back and forth on whether or not to split the chapter up, every time i think ive made a decision then start working on it again and change my mind lol. but you are certainly doing a good job of convincing me to keep it one big massive chapter, so its leaning that way for sure. especially when i know that YOU would get more enjoyment out of it that way<3 knowing that you think it would be worth the time spent reading, i can’t help but want to do my best to finish it out (even if it takes all weekend) and keep it together as one chapter for you specifically. because YOU are a gift my🩵🩵. i swear that on some days your kind words make me smile more than anything else. i LOVE having your asks to go back and read through, and your love for this story warms my heart more than you'll ever know. to hear that it has touched you in such a profound way makes me speechless all over again.🥹🥹

just let me say, your asks and interactions really do make me so happy i don’t even know what to do with myself. i wish i could find all of your favorite things in the world and surround you with them, that is how much i love you🩵💕and of course imo readers are just as important as the writers to any story, but i mean it when i say that specifically YOUR thoughts and YOUR creations have had such a significant impact on me and the whole writing process. if it added 10 years to thank lifespan, then i think it added 100 to mine lmao. thank YOU for being so wonderful, you truly do have a special place in my heart. and don’t worry, there really is no pressure at all to come find me in my dms lol. i totally understand the nerves, but i my door will always be open no matter how long it takes🤗💕 i just can’t wait to share the random things i come across throughout the day that make me think of you.🤭

AND YOU KNOW WHAT. I WANT TO DO MORE THAN SHOW THE MOODBOARD OFF TO MY FRIENDS, I WANT TO PLASTER IT ON A BILLBOARD AND SHOW IT OFF TO THE WHOLE WORLD. “the fact that your irl friends don't know your blog is totally valid bc it's so same for me” lmao im so glad you can relate, and HOLD UP. YOU. WRITE.?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? of course i should have known this (i had a feeling by the way you come up with and explain such unique ideas) BUT YOU WRITE??!?!??! O M G. 🩵. i promise you that if you ever do decide to share your work with the world, i will be the FIRST one in line to read it<333

“every synonym to happy in existence” made me chuckle lol this is so cute and the fact that you said you think the world building is thorough means so much to me because (just like how i live my day to day life) i am navigating through this story with little plan in mind aside from a very general idea of how i want it to end. so this is such a compliment all in its own. it’s almost like you KNEW I needed to hear this.😭 ive also begun to associated green with otde now, thanks to you lol. because having the moodboard as a visual tool to write has just amplified my motivation and the enjoyment that i get from writing x100000000. and i honestly couldn’t have done it better myself. so thank you🩵🥹 i meant it with my whole heart that your love for this story if something ill never forget. even years and years after otde has ended, ill always remember you<3 and (as glad as i am that you’re so excited) please don’t actually die from happiness😂😂 because i truly do not know what i would do without your support. i don’t think the story would exist in the same way if it hadn’t been for you. AND I AM SO EXCITED FOR THE RED VERSION NO BECAUS EYOU DONT EVEN KNOWWWW. HAVE I MENTIONED RED IS MY FAVORITE COLOR!?!?!? HAVE I???????? AND HAVE I MENTIONED THAT RED + FELIX IS THE PERFECT COMBINATION TO GET STRAIGHT TO MY HEART?!?!?! (i barely survived the topline mv tbh. dear lord.🫠🫠🫠) and you’re telling me the red one is SPICIER?!?! okay okay now im the one that actually might sob AND squeal AND THEN die from happiness.😂😂😂😂😭💕

okay okay, let me prepare myself to talk about our parallel universe theories again (i really need to get comfy for this because we’ve reached my favorite part lol) YES. EVEN IN AN AUSTRALIAN TOWN IN MODERN DAY the tension would just be absolutely RIDICULOUS between these two. like even before they SEE each other, maybe they’re just casually at the beach or walking around on the street and suddenly this intense feeling washes over them and they’re like wtf is going on??? why do i feel like this??? and THEN their eyes meet and its just like…..oh. 

I once read something (i think it was a fanfic??) And it was about mc and love interest meeting in every single lifetime and falling in love more intensely every single time.

THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL.😭😭😭 if you ever happen to come across that fic or remember the name, then you MUST send it my way. i absolutely love the idea of soulmates meeting in every single lifetime, and then on top of this, making it so that the love becomes a bit more intense every single time just adds that little angsty cherry on top that i’m always seeking out lol. and as you know, a little twist to an otherwise seemingly innocent trope or storyline gets me weak in the knees🤭

Like them disliking each other at first but then then something happens and suddenly they're sneaking around bc they just NEED each other.

YES.😭✋ and the little detail that they’re sneaking around?? I LOVE IT. because it makes me think that they would NEVER want anyone to know just how badly they need each other, right? but its ridiculous how much they do. and so they keep up the front that they hate each other (and everyone around them genuinely believes it because they’re good at pretending)…but little does everyone know that its only because they’re fucking each others brains out behind closed doors (help) 

Or a life where they have always been best friends (hear me out, long blond haired SURFER FELIX?!??!)  the kind that never separates — no matter how big of a damage they suffer from, they push through effortlessly bc that's just how long they've been so close to each other.

DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON LONG BLONDE HAIRED SURFER LIX, IM PICTURING HIM FROM THAT BEACH PICTURE (you know the one im talking about, you know) ughhjhosdfds🫠🫠🫠 i feel like i could talk to you for HOURS like this, bouncing ideas off of each other. like i actually want to do this so badly with you, because your ideas are just THAT good. i love how you took our favorite trope and changed it around so that it feels different, and yet, still exactly the same.<333 AND THEN YOU GO AND BRING 2019 WORL DTOUR FELIX INTO THIS AND THE THOUGHT OF HIM AS A STREETRACER MAKES ME FERAL. ESPECIALLY THIS-

She doesn't like how reckless he is and he dislikes how she judges too quickly

-NO BECAUSE WE NEED TO DISCUSS THIS FURTHER. I think you have awakened something in me with this AND I NEED MORE.😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

omg okay. get it together alex lol. im so glad you like the idea that for the tattoo, the flower would be something mc drew. (i was so excited to see your reaction to this lol because trust me, tattoos make me weak too) AND I THINK IT IS SO COOL THAT YOURE INTO BOTANY AND FLOWER LANGUAGE OMG.??? tbh there was actually something i wanted to include in otde that was related to flowers, but i hardly have any knowledge about them at all😪😪 i looked up what a yarrow symbolizes and it said healing and love??? and i even saw somewhere that it said protection? i am WEAK.😭😭 “it shows how she keeps him grounded even though he's nothing if not a mess.” BRB S O B B I N G.😭😭😭😭

like she just casually gives it to him one evening when they're out and then he suddenly never takes it off. Or if she says she prefers some kind of drink/food, catch him stacking his fridge full of it.

omg okay in this parallel college/uni world that we’ve created i love this idea that he’s totally obsessed with her (and she’s a bit oblivious lol). like with the hair tie she definitely notices that he never took it off which is just a bit peculiar..but then like you said she starts to notice his fridge is stocked with all of her favorite things and maybe she casually mentions a scent she likes and the next day she catches that specific scent and he’s just like oh yeah just a new shampoo….🤭🤭 (i could go on and on forever but you get the idea) and im totally with you on the fact that thinking about different past lives of theirs might just have become my new favorite obsession.🫢

the hyunlix dance WAS rude wasn't it?!?!? im literally just trying to make it through the day over here, and then they go and do THAT?! (they really have no consideration for our mental health do they) but i love the addition of “the eve” to the playlist. and OMG. the song you shared called "half of my heart"!!! i was speechless while listening because wtf?! it fits SO well (all of your recommendations do ofc, but this is actually insane???) like you said it could literally fit them in every SINGLE universe we've talked about🙃 your descriptions are so vivid i love the way you talked about “your face” by wisp, with them looking at each other amidst the rain and fighting the urge to reveal their hidden feelings. I CAN ACTUALLY SEE THEM THERE. and if you couldn’t tell by now, I LOVE EMOTIONS THAT ARE SEEN NOT HEARD.😭😭 your song choices are PERFECT, and your descriptions to go along with them just make it so much better. so please please never stop recommending songs like this either🩵 i get so excited when i see you’ve added a new song to the playlist or when you mention it in an ask. i really really do, i stop everything im doing and go listen (and usually end up jotting down some ideas) because THAT is how good your suggestions are.

ah i love you so much🩵🩵🩵🩵 i’m so happy to receive your asks, and to have the opportunity to talk to you like this. it really has made my days so much brighter ever since you came into my life. i’ll always be here to receive your love virtually, and do my best to send it back even stronger!!!🤗💕💕💕 im sorry i didnt get this out until today, i really just like to take my time and make sure i get to everything when i respond to you (and i literally go back and edit it like its a chapter of otde.😂😂😭) because you deserve nothing but the very best. so in conclusion (first i would like to thank you for making it all the way to the end of this lol) but my dear 🩵🩵🩵 i love you so very much. and i hope all is going well for you, not just with the red moodboard (although i am every synonym for excited to see it) but with life in general too. i hope you have the most wonderful rest of your week, remember to be kind to yourself<3333 and as we always say, stay safe out there.🩵🩵 take care of yourself and those friends of yours💕💕ily🤗🤗

[actualbird]

hey!! if u dont mind me asking, what are ur top 5 bmc fics of all time and why? (including the ones you've already recced!!) anyway i hope ur doing great ily

THIS IS SO DIFFICULT WTF but i did it anyway. pls take note that these r my personal faves and curating this list was HARD bc i love so many fics and there r so many good ones out there hhhhhh!! but i did it!! god!!!! i tried to keep my paragraphs of praise (relatively) short-ish and spoiler free.

(!!!make sure to check the tags and the ratings of these fics!!! my previous bmc rec lists can be found here, here, and here.)

without further ado here is, in no particular order, 4 fics id take a bullet for (I KNO U ASKED FOR 5 but there are only really 4 that struck me to the point that i go on and on about them embarrassingly)

no such mirrors by Kalopsia

Jeremy didn’t know of any other superhero that had to commute.

Sometimes he was alone when he got the text, and it was easy to slide open the window and sling on over to whatever disaster was striking the City That Could Never Catch a Break. Other times it was during things like his parent’s divorce hearings, in Hackensack, and he’d have to spend his bar mitzvah money on a cab ride to the bridge and change into his spandex in the bathroom of a Dunkin’ Donuts. Even at home, he’d have to spend fifteen minutes slinging webs across highways and toll booths and the George Washington Bridge before he even saw what he was up against.

At least Christine could fly.

(or, the AU nobody asked for in which Jeremy is Spiderman and the rest of the crew has superpowers, except Michael, who has No Idea About Anything except for the fact he’s Spiderman’s #1 fan)

ive recced this before and i love it and! just!! GODDD!!!!! so i think this was one of the first fics i read upon falling into bmc and ive followed it even before i started writing any fic for the fandom myself. reading it was definitely a turning point which maybe cemented my stay in this weird corner of the internet because 1) it was the first Full bmc au fic i had read and 2) it’s so good.

exciting! hilarious! an incredible balance between jeremy’s normal life and jeremy’s spiderman life!! im usually very picky with fight scenes (ive been in several spy movie fandoms) but the ones here are so good fast paced and!! the movement!!!! it feels like watching a movie. of course, when the action dies down, this fic goes fucking hard with the emotions. the last few chapters have had me clutching my chest basically the entire time because god. damn. damn. send help. not just to me but like, to various characters in this goddamn fic, jesus. anyway overall this fic, when not hurting me, is so much fun to read.

your song’s got me feeling like by DivineProjectZero

“Actually,” the DJ says, “I watched you dance for a while.”

God, he just wants to have this man for one night.

this fic was literally just posted yesterday but it’s so good it’s my top 4 already. like okay ive been in love with DPZ’s fics since two years ago in the kingsman fandom (which u should also read if ur interested bc they are 👌👌👌) and when i saw she started writing for bmc i did the mental equivalent of vaulting over a 40ft hedge to yell at the world.

GOD THIS FIC!! heads up, this is porn. and it’s damn good at that. the gang are now functional adults and poor jeremy just meets the most gorgeous dj ever. like. okay all the characters here each get a little bit of their own screentime and it’s SO GOOD! the buildup? FANTASTIC. the chemistry? A++++++. the bit after? added 10 years to my lifespan and also made me believe in love. jeremy’s pov here is sooooooo good because it’s the self esteem mess we all know and love but translated into an older (though not exactly surer) version which is just a joy to read. well written and well paced and fantastically characterized and also the smut is incredible. i need to lie down for a bit.

Like Mother, Like Son by hurricanesunny

“Jeremy gets a text from his mom after a year of her being gone without contacting him.”

i have also recced this fic before and the first time i bingeread it i cried twice over the course of six chapters. i mightve cried more had i not paced myself. who knows!!! all i know is that this fic maybe probably totally owns my ass.

this fic is hands down my favorite post-canon fic for like. so many reasons. all the characters in this piece are glorious messes. like, no joke, they mess up and make mistakes and there are consequences everywhere, be it from the events occurring in the fic or events that had happened prior. theres so much . and. then. this fic confronts each and every one of those consequences. the structure of this piece reads like a one by one revenge arc, but instead of revenge, it’s jeremy making amends. AND IT’S THE BEST THING EVER. each chapter is a special kind of catharsis boosted forward by incredible characterization and a pov internal monolog to die for. the writing is phenomenal. the development is like. beyond words and i wanna scream. or maybe cry for the third time. anyway just. it’s good okay. im beginning to lose my coherency.

you give me miles and miles of mountains (and i’ll ask for the sea) by left_uncovered

It scares Jeremy sometimes, the things Michael does for him.

(Michael is in love with Jeremy. Jeremy just wishes loving and being in love were the same thing.)

havent recced this before but here i am now and. you have to read this. well, okay, you have to read this if youre fine with your heart being ripped out gently by an incredible fic that is a mosaic of pining and pain and how unfair things are sometimes. if ur alright with that, PLEASE READ THIS. IT’S SO GOOD.

left_uncovered, resident pain lord, is startlingly bad at actually getting Michael and Jeremy together in her fics but she’s so ridiculously good at constructing a story that is so real it cuts you to the bone and makes you hurt. it’s not the Over The Top kind of hurt, but the hurt that’s even worse because against all odds and optimism and hopes, you understand why it’s happening. sometimes things dont match up, and it’s a little bit of a tragedy for everybody involved. that’s life. this fic is just so gentle and so good at telling you that with short scenes and a stunning writing style that, at times, can only be described as brutal. in one word: ouch. in many words: ouch but holy god, this was fantastic.

so yeah!! there it is!! i highly recommend all these fics and the other fics these authors have written too. make sure to leave kudos on fics u like!! make sure to comment nice things!! show love!!