#you're told exactly how to speak and interact with others and to be blunt and clear and to the point with your words. you're saying he does

[moreaugriffins]

Every day i just want to write a post that just says "The Brigadier is so damn autistic."

but I then worry about what other people might say if I do that

but fuck it

The Brigadier is so fucking autistic, and nobody can change my mind

[1ddyfckr]

if  i  ever  seem  curt  when  talking  ooc,  i  apologize.

i  have  been  in     &.     out  of  the  fandom  scene     &.     tumblr  for  a  little  over  a  decade.     at  this  point.     i'm  at  an  age  where  i  don't  have  the  energy  for  a  lot  of  these  things  anymore.     i  am...     afraid  of  reaching  out     &.     forming  bonds.     i  have  realized  that  this  is  evidently  my  fault.

i  am  always  eager  to  jump  in  with  a  writer     &.     make  stories,  exchange  plot  lines,  do  rapid  fire  roleplays,  bur  it  always  starts     &.     ends  the  same  way :     we're  both  invested,  we  make  all  these  scenarios,  we  exchange  in  depth  metas,  we  share  videos,  images,  memes  that  remind  each  other  of  our  characters,  we  talk  every  day  for  several  hours  on  end  etc  etc.

but  somewhere  along  the  line,  i  lose  them.     the  other  person's  interest  dwindles  until  i'm  trying  to  light  up  the  spark  in  them  again.     responses  become  less  enthusiastic,  less  detailed,  until  all  i'm  left  with  is  one  word  responses  or  even  just  emoji  reactions.     until  one  day,  i  realize  we  haven't  spoken  in  several  months,  sometimes  close  to  a  year     &.     it's  not  for  a  lack  of  trying  on  my  end.     i  leave  detailed  plots  or  messages.     or  sometimes  just  me  trying  to  check  in.     &.     i  get  crickets,  because  by  that  point,  the  person  has  already  moved  on  to  something  else.

it  sucks.

what  trips  me  out  is  that  this  doesn't  happen  once  or  maybe  twice  from  the  same  fandom.     this  has  happened  in  several  fandoms,  with  several  different  people,  at  different  stages  of  my  life,  playing  with  different  characters.     logically,  if  it  the  same  thing  keeps  happening  to  you  at  several  different  times  of  your  life  with  several  different  people,  that  tells  you  that  you're  the  problem.     but  it's  frustrating  because...     i  never  quite  know  how  to  make  it  better,  how  to  fix  it.

a  recent  incident  has  also  led  me  to  the  conclusion  that,  just  generally  speaking,  i'm  not  really  likable.     the  other  person  was  apparently  looking  forward  to  writing  with  me,  until  they  realized  that  i  was  someone  they  already  knew,     &.     all  of  a  sudden,  i  don't  hear  anything  from  them  anymore.     &.     i'm  not  saying  that  to  get  pity  points  or  anything,  even  in  real  life,  i've  been  told  that  i  can  come  across  really  blunt,  rude  or  selfish.     i've  been  trying  to  adjust  my  behaviors,  because  i  never  mean  ill  intent,  perhaps  my  personality  may  be  off  putting.

but  again,  it  becomes  frustrating  because  i  don't  know  what  exactly  to  do.     what  exact  behaviors  to  adjust.     previous  experiences  has  shown  me,  apparently  i'm  likable  to  a  point.     but...     then  stuff  happens,     &.     suddenly  i'm  not  interesting  anymore,  i'm  boring,  i'm  repetitive.     &.     yet  i  see  other  people  acting  the  same  way  i  do     &.     they  don't  seem  to  have  the  same  issues,  regarding  writing     &.     interacting / roleplaying  with  others.     

i  just  don't  understand.

people  tell  you  it's  natural,  not  everyone  can  talk  about  the  same  thing  for  several  years  on  end     &.     yet,  i  can't  help  but  look  with  envy  to  those  that  have  these  strong  friendships  that  last  years  on  end     &.     they  can  indeed  talk  about  the  same  ships     &.     the  same  plots     &.     everything.

so  i  feel  stuck,  tired     &.     not  really  eager  to  make  new  bonds  because  i  know  it'll  end  up  the  same  way.     i  just  came  out  of  this  very  situation.     i  had  a  roleplay  partner  on  discord     &.     we  spoke  for  about  just  a  little  over  two  years  about  our  ship,  but  then  gradually,  it  started  to  dwindle.     they  stopped  reaching  out,  they  stopped  getting  excited  to  see  me,  they  stopped  checking  up  on  me,  even  when  i  would  still  do  the  same  in  return.     &.     the  crazy  part  is  that,  with  all  these,  i'm  never  blocked,  i'm  never  '  broken  up  with',  these  people  are  theoretically  still  my  friends,  but  whenever  i  try  to  reach  out,  it's  like  i  have  to  reintroduce  myself  all  over  again.     it  hurts  because,  i  may  have  been  easily  forgetful  for  them,  but  for  me ?     i  remember  them,  i  go  back  to  our  messages     &.     i  read  them     &.     i  have  them  ingrained  in  my  head  because  they  are  people  that  i  want  to  talk  with     &.     continue  engaging  with.     but  the  feeling  is  apparently  never  mutual.

so  this  has  led  me  to  where  i  am  now,  where  i  do  want  to  roleplay,  i  DO  want  to  interact,  i  WANT  to  be  happy  to  get  excited  without  the  feeling  of  dread,  but  the  pain  of  potentially  going  thru  the  same  experience  is  too  much  for  my  mental  health,  so  i  just  keep  to  myself.     maybe  i  can  learn  to  hype  MYSELF  up,  to  get  excited  over  my  own  ideas  i  stead  of  seeking  constant  validation.     it  would  be  so  much  easier  for  me  if  i  didn't  care  for  interaction,  because  then  i  could  just  write  all  the  fanfiction  ideas  i  have,  but  have  no  motivation  to  write.     

but  i  do  crave  that  interaction,  so...     i  just  think  it's  best  if  i  keep  everything  to  a  minimum.     thus,  if  you  have  tried  to  reach  out  to  me     &.     i  don't  seem  that  receptive,  please  understand  that  it's  literally  not  you,  it's  me.     i'm  just  trying  to  keep  myself  guarded  for  my  own  mental  health,     &.     i'm  not  as  diligent  as  i  used  to  be  with  messages.     inbox  is  always  open,  starter  calls  are  obviously  open  if  i  post  them  etc.     this  isn't  to  announce  that  i'm  changing  anything,  this  is  more  of  an  explanation  as  to  why  i  am  the  way  i  am.

thank  you  for  reading  xx

[officialinvisibleanon]

Welcome to Starlo's tips and tricks for "Getting Gud" at writing!

((Hey guys! It's me, Starlo. I've often been told that I write extremely well and realistically. So I decided to make a post to help others write as well. This could be a series or a one-off. But I'm not that great of a teacher, so it'll probably be a one-off.))

Lesson 1: GRAMMAR, GRAMMAR, GRAMMAR!

((In my opinion, proper, or at least, decent grammar is crucial to have a believable story. I personally think that a character speaking with the correct spelling of words is the most important part of the story. This is because they are SAYING it with their MOUTHS. So if a word is misspelled or a punctuation mark is misplaced, then the way they are saying what they are saying is changed. Often, it seems like they misspoke, but if it happens often enough, then they seem to have some speech impediment. This, of course, is often unintended.))

((However, narration having proper grammar is also important, if only to make it so other people can easily understand what's going on.))

((Now that I've laid out the importance of correct grammar, here are some actual tips for HAVING correct grammar.))

((They're, there, and their mean VERY different things. "They're" is a contraction meaning "They Are". "There" refers to the location of an object. "Their" refers to something that belongs to someone and is used like "Hers" or "His". I.e. "Oh, you're looking for the file on Dr. Jeffery? Well, their file is right over there."))

((Obviously, you should capitalize nouns and the beginnings of sentences, but capitalization can be used for other things, as well. Say, what if you wanted to discreetly define some Important Words? Or maybe you wanted a character to emphasize PART of a sentence or word, but not the WHOLE sentence or word? You can do a lot with capitalization.))

Lesson 2: It's The End Of The Word As We Know It (And I Feel Fine)

((What if Tumblr removed all text customization tomorrow? Could you tell your characters apart? Could other viewers? You always want to differentiate the speaking styles of your characters to match their respective personalities.))

((For example, Inviz speakers in an often blocky and chill tone, and he uses basic slang, like "chill" and "s'cool" often, but uses more, for lack of a better term, "slang-y" slang, like "Thicc" and "Cringe", extremely rarely. Orange almost never uses any slang, but is still really emotive. My point is, make sure your characters speak in a way that suits THEM, and not a way that suits you. This actually brings me to my next point...))

Lesson 3: You are not the one in control.

((Or at least, you shouldn't be. The plot is everything, right? NO! NO. Shut up. No. You couldn't be more wrong. I'm sorry for being blunt but it's true.))

((So what is most important? CHARACTER INTERACTION. Never ever EVER force a character to do something that clashes against their personality or morals. You could accidentally change the context of the entire story. Why would they do that when they logically would never? Are they hiding something? Are they hiding something BAD? You would never know because such an event would never happen again.))

((So how do you avoid such an event? Never let anything happen without a reason. If you can't answer when someone asks "why?", then do NOT let that character perform that action. Obviously, you can steer your character's in the "right" direction, but be mindful of how they do things.))

((If you have trouble figuring out exactly what a given character would do, just go with your gut. But do not stray from the gut. If you aren't sure, do not try to steer towards the plot, as you may accidentally make the character do something that shouldn't fit them. I know I'm basically reiterating the same thing over and over again, but- it's really important.))

Lesson 4: The End?

((And that's it! Tell me if you have any questions, get Grammarly, and goodbye!))