#you're getting tagged in every single one of my Hawks reblogs

[deadpoetsocieteaparty]

@kazieai I have decided that since I am snickering at my new favorite bird boi then you need to snicker with me. I would never have even paid him any attention but you brought him to my attention before I even knew who he was. So when he showed up I got all excited and now I'm hooked and it's all your fault.

Look at this screenshot of him omg hahaha

Fanon Hawks is often portrayed cool and collected and then there’s…

Canon Hawks:

[startrekfangirl2233-writes]

Spring, 2020 - North Island Naval Base

Chapter 5 Part 1 of You Are My Soulmate

Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x Reader

Description: Two months. You've been back to work for just about two months now and it feels even more like you're under a microscope than before. It feels like all eyes are on you, all the time and you hate it. You hate more that you haven't seen Bradley even once since that day. Add to that the fact that you haven't been able to go home and the added pressures of possibly being court martialed and you just want this all to be done.

Disclaimers: Misogynistic speech. Mentioned Homosexual Relationships. Angst. Flagrant disregard for protocols or Authority. Angst. Anguish.

This content presented in this story is for audiences age 18 and over only. MINORS DNI. I will not be accepting tag-list requests from Blank or Ageless Blogs for this story.

Warnings: Female!Reader

Word Count: 3056

A/N: Here’s Chapter 5 of YAMS! We're going to continue to see the far-reaching ripples of Hawk's actions. We're also going to get some cute Macheresin and IceMav because I couldn't help myself. As always, your reblogs and comments make me so happy! Feel free to drop me an ask if you want to chat about this chapter or any of my other works!

AO3: Cross-posted Here!

Wattpad: Cross-posted Here!

My Masterlist

Previous Part | Series Masterlist | Next Part

Tinkerbell

It's been three months since Bradley Bradshaw's accident. You only had your medical leave to prepare yourself for what would unfold once you were back on base. It wasn't enough. You knew the rumors would be floating around, that there would be sharks in the chum infested water, waiting for you to show any sign of weakness, a single cut even, to attack. Hawk's interviews, exposes, and tell-alls exacerbated that. You hadn’t even parked before everyone was looking at you with curious eyes. Everyone seemed to want to know why you’d actually been out for so long and if Hawk was right or just full of shit. But your lips are sealed. Under orders from Admirals Bates, Simpson and Mitchell you couldn’t say a word.

The scrutiny is nothing like you’ve ever faced before and you hate every minute of it. The worst part seems to be how you no longer have any credibility as an AMDO. Your first day back on base, you’d been introduced to Commander Grayson. He’s in charge of your team while you’re under investigation. Everything you do is immediately automatically examined by him, and logically you know why. He’s brilliant - your team is under extremely competent leadership under him. Were it under other circumstances you would love to learn from and work with him. But right now, you hate it. The drone project? That’s out of your hands and right into his. The inspections and adjustments occurring on North Island? Those are out of your hands as well. All you’re trusted to do, it seems, is work on paperwork and avoid the chatter that seems to spring up every time you walk into a room.

But the worst part of it all is how you’ve been blocked from seeing Bradley at every turn. You know he’s awake. Admiral Mitchell had been kind enough to tell you as much, that first day you were back on base, something the bond between you had hinted to as well. But Commander Grayson dogs your every move while you’re on base, even going so far as to have lunch with you, while  Jake and Javy dog your every move off base. You haven’t slept in your own bed once in those three months either. With the paparazzi still camping out on your front lawn, you’re still sleeping in Jake and Javy’s spare room. 

You haven’t had the chance to see how Bradley’s doing at all, and it hurts. The ache in your chest that you’d felt when Bradley’s jet exploded still throbs dully under your skin. That particular pain hasn’t faded even a little. The only time it had was the one night you’d managed to slip out of Jake and Javy’s house under the cover of night and sneak away to the hospital. You’d sweet talked a nurse into letting you up into Bradley’s room by mentioning he was your soulmate and held one of his big hands between your own. That night was the first in which you felt your heart beating in its rhythm again. It had been so easy, to press kisses against his knuckles and pray that he’d be okay, that he’d wake up again. You’d spoken to him until your voice was gone and snuck out at dawn with an exhausted body but a mostly settled mind. That one night felt far too short. Even knowing that Bradley is okay isn't enough. A part of you isn't sure that your mind will be at ease until you speak to him.

Your worry for Bradley is one of the only things fueling you as you trudge through base one bright morning. It's not quite so hot just yet, and you'd normally be ecstatic, making plans to drive out of the city for some fun. But just because the weather is better doesn't mean that your mood is. And then you walk into the AMDO hangar to see Commander Grayson, Admirals Mitchell and Simpson as well as two people in full khakis with JAG insignias pinned to their shoulders and on their chests. They’re introduced to you as Commanders Marks and Greybank.

"Lieutenant Commander, if you'd come with us? We have a few questions about the incidents that happened right here on North Island." It's the female JAG Commander, Marks, who speaks to you first. Her expressionless face rivals Commander Grayson's as he stands at a textbook perfect parade rest with one eyebrow cocked behind her.

You half expect to be locked up in a tiny windowless room with hot lights shining into your face and mercilessly interrogated. But maybe you've been watching too many movies and tv shows recently. What you get instead is a conference room, one of the nice ones where visiting Admirals have their meetings. Through the broad windows, you can see planes taking off from the tarmac. But you feel rather like you have a spotlight shining down on you regardless.

"Tinkerbell?" Lieutenant Marks' voice takes you by surprise. "Can I call you, Tinkerbell?" At her surprisingly gentle question, you nod.

"Alright, then. Tinkerbell," She sips carefully on her coffee before straightening out the notebook and pen in front of her. "What happened this year in Hangar Three during your first AMDO inspection on base?"

You’re more than a little taken aback by the question, expecting all of the questions they have for you to be ones about Bradley’s accident and your collapse during it. It must show on your face as well, since you’re asked to sit and once you do so, are asked the question again. Your voice is nearly too quiet as you start relaying the events of that day, including as many details as you remember, noting how they have your paperwork from that day in front of them. They’re cross referencing everything you say with the accounts in the reports, and it surprises you to see they have more than just your reports in front of them. They have statements from the Dagger Squad, the Admirals and even members of the Top Gun class in front of them. If your theory is right, they seem to want little to do with you at all and instead want all of the information they can get on Hawk. You finally ask why after the recess they allow you for lunch.

“Commanders, if I could ask a question?” Your voice is hesitant. They’ve already taken far too many notes about Bradley’s accident and your own subsequent hospitalization. You’ve had to disclose your suspicions that you’re his soulmate as well. Things already don’t look good for you, but you just have to know.

“Why are you focusing so much on Lieutenant Junior Grade Taylor’s movements and actions over the past few months?” The question spills out of you in a deluge of sound. Your ears feel like they’re ringing as the Commanders look at each other before looking at you.

“Lieutenant Commander,” Commander Greybank’s voice sounds incredibly gentle, “Tinkerbell. Did nobody tell you why we were here?”

“No.” You’re quiet, your eyes focused on the way your hands clutch at each other, the knuckles white from the force of your grip.

“We’re your defense team.” Your head jolts up fast, shock parting your lips in disbelief. "Admiral Simpson called us as a special favor."

Marks picks up where her co-counsel leaves off. "Admiral Simpson believes you're innocent. We have evidence of that as well. We have video footage of your hangar, showing exactly who was around Lieutenant Bradshaw's jet while it was supposed to be under repair. We have, of course, footage of the maintenance crew and footage of you, Lieutenants Seresin and Bradshaw early that morning. But we also have footage of Lieutenant Junior Grade Taylor lurking about the jet. We have footage of him removing a part from the engines and walking away."

“I knew he didn’t like me, but why would he do that?” You’re reeling, your hands shaking as they drag the laptop forward so you can view the footage. Your chest aches as you try desperately to breathe despite the panic taking over your body.

“He nearly killed my soulmate.” You’re not sure if the Commanders hear you as tears drip down your cheeks. “He made me believe that I’d killed my soulmate.”

“How sure are you that Lieutenant Bradshaw is your soulmate?” It’s a question you should have expected, though it does give you pause.

You swallow harshly, trying to order your flurried thoughts. “I’ve had all my soulmarks fulfilled by him. We have five.” At the shocked look on Commander Marks’ face, you have to grin, the action grim and small. “I’m sure that all five point to him. But I’m even more sure that he doesn’t know, or if he suspects, has convinced himself of something different.”

“We can use this information, if you’d like, to build your defense. We’d keep it as a last resort in case Taylor or his counsel try to bring it up. Does anybody else know your suspicions?” Commander Greybank looks rather overprotective as he spits out Hawk’s last name like it’s poison.

“Yes, my best friend and his soulmate.” It doesn’t surprise you at all that they want Jake and Javy’s contact info. “And there’s a Doctor on base too? Their name should be in my medical file from when I collapsed. Admirals Simpson and Bates are aware as well.”

“And what about Admiral Mitchell?” 

“I’m afraid I’m not sure if he’s aware or not. He wasn’t by my bedside when I collapsed, and I was put on medical leave immediately afterward.” You sip on your water, wetting your parched throat before continuing. “It is possible that either Admiral Simpson or Admiral Bates told Admiral Mitchell about my suspicions.”

“We’ll have to get in touch with Admiral Mitchell and his husband then.” You blink at the words. Since when is Admiral Mitchell married?

“Tink, there is going to be a lot of media attention surrounding this trial. Especially when the reporters come to know that you and Lieutenant Bradshaw are soulmates.” You’re well aware of that fact, sadly. “Is there someplace safe you can go when you’re not on base?”

“With Lieutenants Seresin and Machado. Reporters have been camped out on my front lawn since Taylor’s first interview.” The anger in the Commanders’ faces has you shrinking a little. “And nobody from the Navy has even offered to protect you?” 

At your nod, they share a glance and then dismiss you for the day. Your mind is still reeling as you meet Jake and Javy at their pick-up truck a couple of hours later. They’re content to talk to each other and leave you to your brooding as you glance out of the window. In the reflections on the window, you can see Jake and Javy, the ease in how they act with each other. Their love reminds you of your parents, sitting in the backseat of your family’s station wagon as a small girl and witnessing how they were always together, no matter how difficult life was. It's been far too long since you've called home, you realize, aching suddenly for your mom's home cooking and to hear your dad's terrible jokes.

But you can't call home. Not yet. They don't need to know about the disaster that has been your soulmate search. Not now. And so long as this thing stays out of the national news, you have time to tell them. Time to find the words. But more than your parents you need to talk to Bradley Bradshaw. You need to apologize. You need to hug him close. You need to tell him how sorry you are for not telling him your suspicions before you nearly lost him.

Jake and Javy help you forget your worries, just a little bit once you're home. They make you smile and laugh as Jake whips up dinner and all three of you dig into the sumptuous meal with a glass of red nearby. But your mind keeps straying back to the question of you and Bradley Bradshaw, over and over again. You’re being a bad friend, you’re sure, and an even worse guest, but you can’t seem to get out of your own head.

You come back to yourself lying on the sofa with Jake wrapped around you. 

“Hey Tinky-Tink. You back with us, pretty girl?” You nod robotically, your mind spinning but your voice locked up behind chains that you can’t seem to break even if you tried. 

“What’s going on, pretty girl? You’re scaring us, sweetheart. We’re your family, aren’t we? Then how come you can’t tell us, tell me, what’s going on in your head?” You curl in closer, reveling in the heat of Jake’s embrace, in the knowledge that your brother, though not in blood, will always protect you.

When your mouth opens, long after Javy joins the two of you and settles on the floor by the sofa, it’s to ask a question you’ve never asked of your friends before.

“How did you know, Jake?” It’s a whisper, barely audible over the rustle of your clothing. “How did you know that Javy was your soulmate?”

“What do you mean, sweetheart?” Jake sounds bemused, even as he pulls you closer. “You know we met when we were 14 and 15.”

Javy’s baritone picks up the story where Jake leaves off.  “Yeah, pretty girl. I was the new guy in class, the only one who looked different from all the others. And your boy here was the only one who introduced himself and asked for my name. Those are our marks, you know? His name, in that travesty of a chicken scratch that he calls handwriting on my thigh and my cursive over his heart.” 

“You’re right, sweetheart. We found each other early. But we didn’t know what we’d found. Not so easily. Not at all.” The weight of past memories is in Javy’s every word.

“It was Texas in the early two-thousands. Homosexuality was accepted even less than it is today. What choice did we have but to be each other’s best friend? To be like the brother we’ve never had? We couldn’t get too close to each other. We could barely sit in class next to each other without getting harrassed.”

There’s an impotent rage building in Jake’s voice, rumbling in his chest as he continues speaking. “We’ve heard it all you know, sweetheart. All the invectives, the rage just because the universe decided we belonged together.”

“But,” You can almost feel Javy’s gently chiding tone as he covers Jake’s hand on your back with his own. “I wouldn’t change anything in the world. The minute we were at the Naval Academy, I felt like I could finally breathe. Jake was thriving, I was thriving. But we were still too hesitant to take the leap. My mama wouldn’t have cared so long as I was happy. But Jake’s parents.”

“My dad would’ve killed me himself if he knew.” You clutch at Jake tighter, your ears hearing the words but your mind unable to compute a world where you never met Jake. “So we kept hiding it. Ignoring the tug in our chests, pulling us to each other. We kept ignoring how we orbited around each other. I kept ignoring how a single word from Javy would make me light up from within, and how it hurt when I took a girl home.”

“I never would’ve stopped if it wasn’t for that disastrous date we went on, Tinky.” You have to chuckle as you remember, Javy’s words making you smile despite your swirling emotions.

It had been one of your first assignments after fully certifying as an AMDO. You were just an ensign and it was your first time in Mississippi. You’d been introduced to the aviator squadrons on base and Javy had taken your breath away, quite literally. He was hot, you remember thinking, and more telling, he never seemed to go home with any of the girls always swarming around khakis at the bars on base. 

So you’d take a chance and asked him out for dinner. You’re not sure who had been more surprised, you or Javy, when he said yes to your stumbling, stuttered dinner invitation. But you remember how it had made your whole week. That had been at the beginning of your search for your soulmate, and well, Javy flew planes for a living, had brown hair (which was a stretch, since his hair is closer to obsidian than brown, you know), and dark-chocolate colored eyes. With nearly three of your soulmarks covered, what did you have to lose?

As it turns out, not a lot. There wasn’t any chemistry between you and Javy at all. He was easy on the eyes, and equally easy to have fun with, but there just wasn’t any spark between the two of you. And then there was the fact that he never shut up about Jake. You’d made it through the whole night before stopping him as he swooped down to kiss you goodnight and told him, “I don’t think this is going to work between us, Javy. There isn’t any electricity between the two of us. I like you, I do. I just think that the Jake you’ve been talking about? I think he might be who you really love.”

That had been the end of that. You’d opened the door a week later to Jake and Javy holding hands on your doorstep and subsequently been absorbed into their little family.

“Sweetheart, if you find that electricity, that spark with someone, then that’s the universe telling you who your soulmate is.” Javy sounds so in love, and you don’t even have to face him to know by his tone alone that he’s looking at Jake.

That’s when you break down, telling Jake and Javy your suspicions, fears and worries. When your mind finally quiets and your shoulders feel a bit lighter, you’re being held tight - this time, by Javy.

“It’s going to be alright, sweetheart. You’ll get the chance to talk to Bradshaw and get this all straightened out. He loves you, sweetheart. He was meant to love you. It’ll be alright.”

You wish with all your heart that Javy is right. You’re not sure you can handle it if he isn’t.

Taglist:

🛩️ @roosters-girl 🛩️ @infamous-reindeer 🛩️ @caitsymichelle13 🛩️ @mattyskies 🛩️ @cosmic-psychickitty 🛩️ @mygyn 🛩️ @julesclues 🛩️ @greenbaby12 🛩️ @bubblegumbeautyqueen 🛩️ @briseisgone 🛩️ @soulmates8 🛩️ @meganlpie 🛩️ @captain-fandomwriter58 🛩️ @caidi-paris 🛩️ @mazzbarnes 🛩️ @super-btstrash-posts 🛩️ @eli2447 🛩️ @chaoticassidy 🛩️ @kmc1989 🛩️ @abaker74 🛩️ @marvelouslyme96 🛩️ @faithiegirl01 🛩️ @shanimallina87 🛩️

I DO NOT CONSENT TO HAVE MY WORK POSTED, TRANSLATED, OR PUBLISHED ON ANY SITES OTHER THAN HERE, ON WATTPAD, OR ON AO3 BY ME. IF YOU SEE MY WORKS ANYWHERE OTHER THAN HERE, ON WATTPAD, OR AO3, THEN THEY HAVE BEEN POSTED WITHOUT MY PERMISSION AND I WILL BE WORKING TO TAKE THEM DOWN.

[kazewhara]

thank u for the tag, @alatusxiaoo ! 🏋🏾

-> why did you choose your url?

y'know, i think about that every once in a while and i cannot remember for the life of me. like, it made so much sense when i came up with it, right? but now i have no idea where it came from. i think it was like.. 'kaze' meaning wind in japanese, the 'hara' part coming from 'kaedehara' ... dunno where the 'w' came from, though. 🤔

-> any sideblogs?

quite a few... i make a new one every time my fixation changes because i tend to write/rp a lot depending on what exactly i'm fixating on. i have one for sdr2, bnha (my hawks phase was really something), a few for bts, three for genshin... yes.

-> how long have you been on tumblr for?

oh god... six years? maybe longer, but i didn't start really using it until my undertale/pastel guro phase, which... hhhhh..

-> do you have a queue tag?

a what?

-> why did you start your blog in the first place?

[stares at the copious amounts of kazuha content] i could not tell you off the top of my head.

-> how many followers do you have?

1,772... i dunno where they came from and i don't know why they're still here, but i love every single one of them from the bottom of my heart <3

-> how many people do you follow?

984.. haven't gone through to clean up shop and i don't think i ever will 😭

-> have you ever made a shitpost?

my entire blog is a fucking shitpost.

-> how often do you use tumblr everyday?

i stayed up to write an albedo x reader drabble once and watched the sun rise as i did it. the tl;dr? too often.

-> did you ever have a fight/argument with a blog before?

eh.. i had some anons get testy with me. there's a lot more in my asks that i gotta clean, actually. otherwise, no.

-> how do you feel about 'you need to reblog' posts?

i ignore most of them. people do the same thing on twitter and i reblog/retweet when i feel the need to but otherwise, you're not about to guilt me into caring about something important. just tell me it's important and i'll take necessary action.

-> do you like ask/tag games?

i do! a lot! being tagged in anything makes me feel special, so... i mean yeah that makes me a loser but i'm beyond the point of shame, so.

-> which one of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

definitely @/witch-hazels-musings (i am so sorry to be mentioning you again ;;;) and @/almond-adeptus ... there's more but my memory is dog shit and i don't wanna say smth stupid.

-> do you have a crush on a mutual?

nope! platonic crushes? yes! i have so many mutuals (and anons!) i want to befriend but i have no way to talk to them because i am so socially inept $*@&#*@&

don't have anyone to tag; feel free to do this if you'd like!

hello hello i was tagged by the ever wonderful @ladislavaa for this tag game!! tysm for the tag i care you so much 💕

-> why did you choose your url?

hoo boy. there’s about… three different references in it, ones i’m not quite willing to explain because i will out myself as a enormous nerd. but it’s subtle enough that most people won’t get it so it’s ok. so i chose it because of the amount of references i could fit in it without it seeming overt.

-> any sideblogs?

i have. a lot. if you look at my bio for my main, there’s a list of sideblogs i have. a dead writing one, some dead ask blogs, an au blog i need to get back to now that school isn’t actively kicking me in the face… and a dimitri one from fire emblem that’s currently thriving now that i’ve revived it. anyways i have a lot of dead ones but i’m fond of them so they’ll stay there.

-> how long have you been on tumblr for?

since july of 2018! the three year mark of my time here on tumblr is coming up and i honestly didn’t expect time to go by so fast. sure i haven’t been here as much as other people, but i’ve enjoyed my time here! for the most part.

-> do you have a queue tag?

nope! not for my main! my ask blogs do, but not this one.

-> why did you start your blog in the first place?

honestly i just wanted to find a place that was fandom-centric so i could meet more people who had similar interests to me. it sounds so cheesy now that i think about it, but i really did just want some friends who had similar interests as me because a lot of the ones i had at the time didn’t.

-> how many followers do you have?

244 as of right now! but i know a good chunk of them are p-rn bots that i’ve reported and blocked over the years, so i’m not sure if that’s an accurate measure of my followers or not. i don’t know why so many people follow me anyways i just spam reblog things lol.

-> how many people do you follow?

336 currently, i kind of have this ‘if i like them, i’ll follow them’ mentality and hope i don’t come off as weird to the people i start following randomly.

-> have you ever made a shitpost?

oh yeah, probably. i’m not very well known for making original posts though, so they kinda just sit in the void that is my blog. i don’t mind, it just means that people won’t see the silly little clown words come directly from my brain.

-> how often do you use tumblr everyday?

probably more than i should. i’ve noticed myself spend a lot less time on it recently, but that’s probably because i’ve been busy. i don’t spend all of my time here though, and that’s good enough for me.

-> did you ever have a fight/argument with a blog before?

ehh, i wouldn’t call it a fight. a little spat here and there, maybe, but that hasn’t happened in some time and at this point i’d prefer not to get involved with people who aren’t worth the effort.

-> how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog’ posts?

i don’t really like the idea of them because of how much guilt tripping they do. sure they’re about important topics, but there’s better ways to raise awareness than to guilt trip people into talking about it. they make me anxious if i’ll be honest, and that’s not great.

-> do you like ask/tag games?

oh i LOVE those, please if anyone wants to tag me in stuff or ask me questions please go for it!! i love talking to people here and interacting in general! i won’t judge you for wanting to ask me stuff or anything, honestly i feel like the weird one for being so enthusiastic about it lol.

-> which one of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

oh for sure i think it’s @/kiiingsnake and @/jamblute. i honestly have no idea why they’re my mutuals and i’m too afraid to tag them in anything (including this). ;-;

-> do you have a crush on a mutual?

eh, no. i love my mutuals, but as friends. also i’m on the aro spectrum so attraction who?? they’re all wonderful people though and i appreciate them.

and that’s it folks! thanks for letting me ramble (somewhat) unprompted. i shall tag @pecha-cake @blackcliff-typewriter @doriduckdoodles @agent–shade and anyone else who wants to do it!!