#you want sand to join us in the pool? i'd love to watch him get naked and do the same

[thisloveislikeabattle]

the fact that ray isn't intimidated by boeing's presence, not even for a second, might be my favorite thing ever regarding ray's personality

he's well aware of who he's dealing with, he knows what kind of person boeing is, so yes ray will play boeing's game but with his own rules

that's his boyfriend and he's not backing down anytime soon

[smurphyse]

Darling, Ain't You Had Enough? | S.R.

Smurph's Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Chapter 11 of Operation: Sand Leopard

Warnings: canon typical stories, blood, stitches, a bit of shitting on the BAU's treatment of Spencer, death, grief,

Summary: After you get back to base, Spencer and the unit keep you awake since you have a concussion. Later, you think about Spencer in the soft morning light.

Barretti carried you on his back through the base a few hours later. Spencer followed with an embarrassingly dumb smile and his hands shoved in his pockets. The doctor had told them to keep you awake, that you had a pretty nasty concussion. That prompted a round of hooahs and Peanut declaring it was what she referred to as 'bonfire time.'

Your head lolled into the side of Barretti's neck, and you kept whispering things to him that made him giggle like a child. Spencer could tell the drugs were wearing off, because you kept wincing and rubbing your face. He hoped it didn't hurt too much. 

His side was beginning to ache, but something about watching you bounce on Barretti's back made the pain lessen. 

They'd all been injured in the attack, with you and Spencer receiving the worst of it. His left shoulder was bruised and aching, a few stitches had been put into his eyebrow, cheekbone and ribcage, but nothing compared to yours. 

Nobody fawned over him, though, and it was such a relief. If he'd been with the BAU, he had little doubt that JJ and Garcia would have forced him into a hospital bed and cried, and he would have had to comfort them about something that happened to him. 

It wasn't that Spencer resented their love and care for him, but there was something about the way the unit trusted him to know his own limits that finally made him feel like part of a team… instead of the fragile little brother everyone wanted to take care of. 

They approached an open section in the center of the base, with a few errant tires and sandbags set up around a cinder block fire pit. It was already burning, and Mercer was standing in front of it, sipping from a pocket flask as he stared into the fire. 

Barretti set you down as they all slowed. Spencer half expected Garrett or you to decide against the bonfire, but you just walked over to Mercer and lightly elbowed him. 

"Mind if we join you?" you asked quietly. 

Mercer watched you for a moment before letting a small smile escape the normally grim line of his mouth, "I'd prefer it, actually."

You said nothing, just picked a sandbag and plopped down in front of it. You stretched out your legs and sighed, and when Barretti sat down next to you, you leaned against his shoulder. 

You held your hand out, palm up, and he took it with a chuckle. Morello and Garrett eased down in front of a tire, and when Peanut found her own spot she immediately pulled a small radio and her little tools out, going to work on the circuitry. 

She did that a lot, worked on random equipment. Spencer liked Peanut. Hell, he liked them all, and their quirks were showing more and more as he spent time with them. 

Morello liked to strum on a guitar or banjo when they had downtime, wearing floppy hats and sticking his feet in one of the various kiddie pools that seemed to be all over the place. The water was always warm, but he seemed to love lounging like Jimmy Buffet and pretending he was on vacation any chance he got. 

Barretti liked to draw, and he'd often spot the two of you giving one another tips. You liked to draw in an old traveler's notebook while he preferred graphing paper. He mostly drew landscapes and you drew portraits. 

Garrett mostly liked to read. He always had some old western in his pocket to pull out and read in awkward positions for a man his age. Spencer could tell each of his books were well read and well used, and he liked to dogear pages and underline things inside… just like you. 

How much of them had rubbed off on you in your time here? How much of you had rubbed off on them? 

How much would you all haunt him when he left?

Spencer decided to shelve that self discussion for now as he eased his way into the sand. It was still hot outside even in the darkness, but there was something comforting about the bonfire in front of him. 

The flames danced in the moonlight, bouncing off everyone's cheeks as they chatted quietly, attempting jokes to make the heavy day less hard to stomach. Spencer felt the smile creep across his face as he watched you all try to push that weight off your shoulders. 

It reminded him of home after a hard case. He missed his family. 

When Mercer sat slowly next to him, Spencer found himself wondering what his quirks were. Surely he wasn't always a grim jackass ready for a fight. Maybe he used to be soft and this place was what changed him. 

"I'm sorry about Hitchens," Spencer said quietly. Mercer grunted and took another sip from the flask and held it out to him, but Spencer shook his head. 

"I'll call his mom in the morning," he muttered after a thick swallow, "his sisters too."

Spencer nodded, moving his gaze back to the firelight. He pulled his legs up and rested his wrists on his knees, wringing his hands together as he struggled through the heavy saliva in his mouth. 

"I saw the kid with the bomb. I should have said something earlier."

Mercer made another grunt, "We all saw him. Nobody wants to think a kid is the enemy."

"I saw it a lot in the FBI. Serial killers using their kids or their victims to lure other ones," Spencer said, eyeing the dirt under his nails and avoiding the way Mercer looked at him. "I don't know what I expected here but… I didn't want it to be as similar as working those cases."

"Can't escape the shitshow, Doc. It's everywhere."

Spencer nodded, but his brows furrowed, "What about the girls?"

Mercer frowned and took another sip, "What girls?"

"The ones from mail day, the ones he was writing."

Mercer shrugged and shook his head, "Those are his sisters. Kid was having a hard time adjusting, so he wrote to em every day. He'd only been here three months."

Spencer said nothing, just groaned and put his head in his hands. Fuck this place. 

"I don't know what your deal is," Mercer started slowly, and when Spencer looked up he just shook the flask at him, "but there's meetings here, if that's what you need. I know a few guys who can point you to em."

"Not like there's much here to tempt me," Spencer said, confessing without confessing as his NA chip weighed heavily in his pocket. 

"You'd be surprised," he muttered. 

"C'mon boss, please!" Barretti begged from the other side of the fire, and both Spencer and Mercer decided to pretend like they weren't talking about sobriety meetings to see what the commotion was. 

"Fuck. You," you laughed, pointing a finger at him. "I got blowed up today. I'm not doing shit."

"One song," Peanut chuckled, holding out a finger. She leaned over her circuit board and waved it at you, "You know you want to."

"Can't. There's no guitar," you purred, leaning back and threading your fingers behind your head as you smiled like a satisfied cat. 

"Ope," Mercer grunted, and he reached behind the tire they were leaning against to pull a guitar out of his gunny pack. He stood just enough to hand it over to you and you took it with a barely restrained grimace. 

"Goddammit. Fine." You set the guitar on your lap and strummed a bit to test it, "What are you thinking? Remember, I'm only doing one."

"The morning one," Barretti decided, and a round of agreement went through the unit. 

"Yeahhh, I like that one! It makes you smile," Morello agreed. 

They all leaned back and settled in to watch as you tried to hold back said smile. You shook your head and started picking at the strings in a soft tune that made Spencer smile despite himself. 

"The sun comes up too early, ain't that the way it seems?" you sang softly, but your voice was strong. "I left the curtains open

Curtains closing on my dreams."

Your fingers played expertly over the strings, your cheeks as red as the fresh stitches on your face. You watched your hands, tapping your foot as you played.

"My baby’s eyes are empty

It’s like nobody’s home

I’m not afraid of empty

I’m afraid of all alone."

They all seemed to know the song, nodding their heads along to the rhythm and patting their legs or the tires in time with your guitar playing. 

"So mama let’s lose

These morning blues

C’mon let’s lose

These morning blues."

The song picked up as you played, and sure enough you started to grin as you went through the chorus. 

Spencer couldn't help but think of spending nights with the teams at the bar, singing karaoke badly and smiling so wide his cheeks burned. The unit was singing along with you, trying to wash away a horrible day with a bit of family time and hoping the morning would bring a fresh breath of air. 

You caught his eye from the other side of the fire, grinning as you sang, "No use in playing tough. I know just what you’re feeling…"

It turned a little sad as the next line spilled from your lips, "Darling ain't you had enough?"

Maybe it was just the long day he'd had, but you seemed to look right into him with that phrase. Maybe it was just the crush he seemed to be forming every time he looked at you, but it felt like more than that. 

The only way he could explain was that it felt like August. The hottest month of the year, blazing and thick with humidity, but it was always the quickest one to slip away into the ether of memory. 

When it came around, it was smothering, achingly long and near painful. There was some longing to it, though, a sadness. It was the end of summer, the beginning of winter, and soon enough February would be blistering its way through the streets of DC and everyone would beg for June. 

August was a point of transition. Unlike spring, which came with birth and renewal, August was about preparing for what came next, which prompted a question to surface in Spencer's mind. 

What's coming next?

----------------

The sun stained the sky with purple and orange as you laid against the sandbags with a smile on your face. That familiar arid heat crept over you as the daybreak shattered the shadows of dusk, bathing you in warmth. 

You welcomed it. After your brush with death you let it bake your healing skin, knowing full well it would only deepen the scarring you were going to have. You didn't mind another batch of scars, you were littered in them by this point anyways. 

The night you and Teddy first got together you compared scars, laying naked in a bed in Dubai and talking lightly about traumatic events. Such were the ways of soldiers, to ease the impact of painful memories. 

Everyone had long since fallen asleep around the campfire, cuddling into rocks and sandbags as they snored in the sand. As always, you couldn't sleep even though you were exhausted and your head pounded as it achingly swelled. 

Your stitches were tightening as the skin tried to heal itself, and you weren't looking forward to the itching that would come in a few days. You just watched the team in an attempt to ignore it, feeling oddly at home and comforted in this place. 

Trailing your gaze along their sleeping forms, your eyes landed on Spencer slumped against a tire. He'd gotten nicked by some shrapnel, a two inch stitched wound on his cheek and another smaller one on his eyebrow. 

You couldn't help but lick your lips as the memory of him shirtless in the infirmary bubbled to the surface. He looked good without it. 

Patched with fuzzy chest hair and shining with sweat, your doped up brain had been way too interested in his naked torso. His dog tags had clinked as they swung from his neck, landing on the valley of his sternum as he leaned back so the doctor could patch him up. The fact that he was covered in blood and you were fucked up really didn't help. 

You liked him a lot more than you'd wanted to admit, and now that you knew what he hid underneath those stuffy button ups your mind wanted to be closer still to him. 

He'd smelled like sweat, but it was lined with cinnamon and musk, no doubt from his aftershave since he probably wasn't wearing cologne out here. He needed to shave again, a light stubble that had popped up now turning into a beard after a few days without having done so. 

You jumped when he sniffled hard and sat up, his chest heaving and his eyes wide. Your body coiled automatically even though whatever you were ready to fight was probably in his head, the hairpin trigger of your training going off without thought. 

He relaxed when he noticed you watching him, and he flashed you a lazy grin and a wave. You waved back, and he pulled himself from the dirt to come over to where you sat. 

Plopping down in the sand, he was hardly more than a few inches away, and he brushed back his messy hair with his hands. He bumped you with his shoulder, "Hey."

"Hey," you said back quietly. 

"How's your head?" 

You shrugged, but your fingers brushed the stitches subconsciously, "It'll be fine. How about you? At this rate you won't leave here as pretty as you came."

You pointed a finger at his tzone, the bruises from Mercer’s punch finally healed to give way to the bruises from the bomb. He gently slapped at your hand and smirked, "Believe it or not, I've had worse."

"Ooh, do tell, Doctor Badass," you chuckled, easing into the bags and smiling up at him. 

"Well, I got shot in the neck once. That hurt way worse," he said with a smile, but it wiped yours away. 

Spencer shoved his hair away from his neck to reveal a nearly two inch scar just under his jugular. You came to the realizing horror he probably almost died from it. 

"Getting shot in the knee was the worst one, though. I walked with a cane for over a year."

You frowned and nodded, "Shot multiple times and you went to prison. You really are Doctor Badass."

He shrugged, but his shoulders seemed to struggle with the weight of it, "I've also been blown up a few times, so yesterday wasn't anything new for me."

He breezed right past you knowing he'd been to prison, so you did the same. You waved a hand at him, "It's blowed up here, Doc."

Spencer scoffed and smiled at you, and some of the weight lifted from him, "I'm never going to know all this jargon, Agent."

"'S okay. We don't know what the hell we're talking about half the time anyway," you told him, and he laughed. 

It was bright, and it made something twist in your chest. Even though you laughed with him, your heart was clenching roughly at the thought of all he'd been through. Your first impression of him had been correct. 

He was soft, but traumatized. You wondered how he kept himself so gentle even after all that. Maybe you could learn how to do it too. 

Notes: Please let me know how you enjoyed this! Feedback is incredibly meaningful and only helps me write more!<3

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@thedancingcostumeyoungadult @muffin-cup @simplyparker @spencerreidsmommy @hotchandspencearedilfs @gspenc @kbakery @nomajdetective @givemeth @hoshihiime @halloween-is-my-nationality @reidselle @thisiscalmanditsdoctorreid @dreatine @thebloomingeagle @fortheloveofwonderland @theforgottenwinter @parkerreidnorth @reidselle @randomhoex @scargarcia-magshotchner @stitchwrites @pygmygoat-bicyclehelmet @cle13 @aysixdy @elhotchner @directioner5life @elhotchner @loveeee2134 @preciousbabypeter @la-stuffs @stories-you-wont-hear @hotchlover @fortheloveofwonderland @lokiandhisdagger @bellanutellababyyy @dark-night-sky-99 @straightforbuckybutgayfornatasha @maltamurdock @charelletjee @kansas-reid @zephyrmonkey @spencer-reid-wonderland @spencersprettyslut @im-sure-its-fine @tvdstelenaforever @teddylupintonks @preciousbabypeter @lilibet261

[leelee10898]

Fast cars & Freedom: Little wonders (6/?)

Summary: Ellie and Luca spend some quality time with both Logan and Colt. Will they behave?

Pairing: Logan x Ellie, Colt x Ellie

Rating: Mature.

AN: Ok, a little fluff here and there, some steamy stuff too... I got a little carried away here at 2,900 words!! Catch up HERE. As always if you would like to be added to the tag list, let me know!

Song inspiration:

Ellie walked into the house, flopping herself on the couch. “So, how'd it go?” Riya asked.

“Well, he's coming to the beach with us.” Riya made a face “Yikes! How do you think that's going to go?”

“I don't know,  good I hope. I shouldn't have invited him along, but I just wanted them both to meet her. I mean really meet her, in Colt's case. Not just a run in at the farmers market.”

“Can I ask you a question?” Ellie sat up, usually when Riya said that, she didn't like what she was going to be asked “Ok. Sure.” she hesitantly answered.

“Why are you going to have them meet her before the paternity test? Isn't that setting one up to be hurt when the results come in?”

Ellie sat there staring at her best friend,  she was right. Of course she was right, and that was the logical thing to do. “Well, Logan asked to meet her. And Colt, well he has already met her and wants to get to know her. I don't know, it seemed like a good idea at the time.”  she let out a frustrated sigh.

“And what about them? How are you going to handle being around them both? I know you still care for them.” Riya gave her a knowing look.

“Ri this isn't about me, it's about Luca knowing her father. My feelings dont matter right now.” that was a lie, or a half lie at least. As soon as she saw the both of them, her feelings came flooding back.

They spent the night hanging out, talking and  playing some board games with Luca. Ellie got Luca to sleep and then laid down herself. They were all meeting at the beach  and her nerves were a wreck. She tossed and turned before finally falling asleep. But her dreams were running wild.

********

Her fingers trailed long the jukebox key, scrolling for the perfect song. She pressed her selection as Logan quirked his brow grabbing her hand pulling her close. “Very fitting song, seeing as you're spending your evening with a dangerous criminal.”

“The only thing Dangerous about you are those totally kissable lips.” She smirked as she leaned in.  

They swayed together, it was only the two of them in that moment.  “Have you thought about going back to school?” she cooed into his ear.

   “Eh I don't know, having to sit in a school all day, abiding by someone's rules. That's the reason I dropped out in the first place.”

She lifted her head from his shoulder “Logan, there are other ways to get your diploma.  Night school for one. You could even do it online. Just, think about it ok?”

He leaned down, placing a soft kiss on her lips. “For you, I'd move the stars in the sky.”

**********

  “Mommy. Mommy.” her eyes flew open,  pulling her from the dream. “Luca? What's the matter sweetie?” Luca stood before her, tears in her her eyes. “I had a bad dream.” she sniffled. Ellie picked her up and laid her in bed next to her. Luca snuggled up next to her as she rubbed her hair, Ellie began to hum a sweet melody, it was one her mother used to sing her.

Lavender's green, dilly, dilly

Lavender's blue

If you love me, dilly, dilly

I will love you

It didn't take long before they were both sound asleep.

Ellie woke the next morning and crept down the stairs. “Morning” her dad said coffee in hand, he slid another towards her. “Morning.  What time did you get in last night?” Ellie smirked, knowing it had to be very late. “Ah 1am? We were talking and the time just got away from us.” Her father couldn't wipe the smile off his face, she was so happy for him.  After her mother died, he refused to date. He put all of his energy into raising her and working, but in recent years he started to dip his feet in the dating pool.

“So, you all ready for your beach trip with Logan today?” he asked as he took a seat next to her at the kitchen table. “Well, I sort of invited Colt along.” she shrugged,  a new development her father hadn't been made privy to. “COLT!?” Her father choked on his coffee. “Yeah, We sort of ran into him at the farmers market yesterday. He ah. Met Luca,” she sipped her coffee, avoiding eye contact. “Oh there's jerky for you.” she tried changing the subject.  Her father had been hell bent on her telling them since Luca was born, he hated that Ellie was solely responsible for Lucas care and there were 2 able bodied men out there somewhere. “Well, its about damn time I say.” She rolled her eyes, and went upstairs to get Luca ready.

They arrived at the beach a short time later, they un packed the car and found a spot on the beach waiting for Logan and colt to arrive. Ellie hadn't told Luca that both Colt and Logan would be joining them, so it was going to be a surprise.  Logan was the first to arrive. With butterflies in his stomach he trudged across the sand in a pair of swim trunks and a t-shirt. “Hey troublemaker.” He grinned as he approached. “Hey Logan.” she gave him a hug “Ready to meet her?” he nodded as they turned towards Luca “Sweetie I want you to meet somebody.  This is Logan, one of mommy's old friends. Logan, this is Luca.” Luca quirked her little brow, “Hi Logan. Are all of mommy's old friends boys?”

“Ahhhh.” He looked at Ellie confused, just then they heard the sound of a loud motorcycle pull up. “We ah, ran into Colt at the farmers market yesterday. He knows.” longan shook his head “Got ya. This should be fun.” she pushed him. “Play nice, I've already warned him.” He gave her a lopsided smile “Yes mom.”

Colt approached the group.  “Hi El.” he hugged her. His eyes locked on Logan “Logan.” he put his hand out, Logan grasped it firmly. “Hi Colt.” “Is that your motorcycle?” Luca approached awe struck. “Yes it is. Do you like motorcycles?” Luca shook her head “Yup. They go fast,  I like fast stuff, it's fun.” Both men shared a grin, and then looking at Ellie who shook her head “Yeah, she does. Cars too. Do you see where it gets confusing for me?”

“Can we play now?” Luca whined, bored of the conversation. “Sure, what do you want to play?” Logan asked. “How about sandcastles? Will you guys help me? I need a lot of water and my little arms can't carry it alll the way up here.” Colt snickered, she definitely had Ellie's dramatic flare. “Of course we can.” Colt answered as they started walking towards an open spot next to them. “um Colt, Logan. You're going to get all sandy, you need to be beach ready.” She snapped.  

Ellie watched the two men be ordered around, they were practically tripping over themselves to help her. And then Logan stripped his shirt off, Ellies gaze traveled his chest. He was still so toned and firm, she wasn't sure it was possible for him to look any better than he used to, but damn if he wasn't.  Her eyes snapped to the side of him to where colt was removing his shirt and jeans. Ellie couldn't help but gawk as her eyes feasted over yet another perfectly sculpted body.

Colts shoulders were a bit broader than they used to be but he still looked like a tan god standing in front of her. She swore she was drooling, but for the life of her she couldn't stop staring. How was it fair that time had only made them hotter? She was thicker than she used to be. After she had Luca, she filled out in many areas, making her a little self conscious.

So here she stood, unable to move or blink, she didn't hear the kid down the beach hollering heads up, just as a volleyball hit her in the side of the head. “Are you ok Ellie?” Logan shouted “Yeah, im fine.” she shouted back. A cuckling Colt ran forward collecting the ball. He reached down scooping it up.

   “See something you like?” He shot her a wink as he threw the ball back, and went back playing with Luca and Logan. Ellie sat down in her chair, catching some sun her mind wandering back..

*******

She had just walked downstairs to grab a drink of water. It was hot up in the loft. She heard some noises and grunts coming from the garage area. She crept out to see who it was. She stopped in the doorway seeing Colt working on his bike. He stood ripping off his shirt and tossing it on the tool box behind him. She watched as his glistening sweat covered muscles flexed with each motion he made. She leaned against the door frame, marveling in the sight of him. when she met him she couldn't stand him, He was so smug and arrogant, but boy was he was nice to look at.

He stood noticing her there, smirking as he walked towards her, noticing the way she was staring at him. “See something you like?” He said as he walked past her and into the kitchen, washing his hands.

   “I ah. It's hot. I mean,  up there. Its um, hot.” she stumbled on her words

     “You said that already.” He chuckled as he walked up to her grabbing the bottle of water and drinking it.

     “You are so infuriating.” she scoffed as he pushed closer to her, his body inches from hers.

    “Oh yeah? You gonna do something about that?” he challenged.  her eyes locked with his as she reached out and touched his chest. She felt his muscles contract under her touch.  

His lips were on hers in an instant. His tongue parting her lips causing a soft moan to escape. They pulled back breathless, their eyes searching each others as they came together again. Her hands lacing his black locks. He backed her up against the fridge knocking several items off the top. His lips left hers placing frantic kisses along her jawline, making their way down her neck as he nipped and gently sucked her pulse point. “Mmmm Colt.” He slipped his hand up her loose tank top, gently caressing her bare chest. His lips were on hers again as her hand reached down softly palming his already stiff length. He moaned out thrusting himself against her hand. “Fuck Ellie, I want you. I want you so bad.”

His lips finding her neck again. “Colt. Please.” Her body ached for his touch.

“Well well well. What do we have here?” They froze in place seeing Mona smirking.

*****

Ellie shook the thought from her head as she watched the three before her building a sandcastle.  

   “Your side is lopsided Kaneko, what's wrong? Don't you know how to build a sandcastle?” Logan boasted.

  “Yeah. Well your side is to dry.” He reached out pushing his finger into the side of Logan's tower. “See, just fell apart.”

  “What's Kaneko?” Luca asked

  “It's my last name.” Colt smiled at the question.  

  “Why did Logan call you that?”

  “Well, that's what everybody used to call my dad and sometimes me.” Colt answered somberly, Logan gave him a sympathetic look.

They continued to work on the sandcastle, both making little cracks at each other undetected to Luca.  “um Colt, what are you doing?” Colt looked at her confused “what is that?” She pointed at the small cannon he constructed in the tower. “This cannon? Oh, its to help defend the castle against intruders.” He grinned clearly pleased with himself.  “magical mermaid princess's do NOT have intruders Colt.” Logan snickered “Ok. Ok. No cannons.”

Luca stood up “Ok, it's time for swimming. Mommy, let's go swimming.” Luca yelled running over to Her. Colt and Logan stood up “Ok I still hate you but, the cannon was a nice touch.” Logan whispered, Colt smirked “Next time, we make a mans castle.”

Ellie stood up and shimmied out of her shorts, leaving her tank top on walking towards the water.  “Mommy, you left your shirt on. You gotta take it off.” Ellie stood there frozen “Mommy is just going to leave her shirt on ok.”

“Mommy. You don't wear a shirt in the water.” she put her hands on her hips. “Yeah Ellie, what are you chicken?” Logan teased. Ellie rolled her eyes at him lifting her shirt. She noticed their eyes glued to her. Why not have a little fun? She thought taking Lucas hand and walking towards the water, sashaying her hips eith a little extra oomph to show off. Colt and Logan stood there staring. Ellie was beautiful before, but since she had gotten older she matured into a stunning woman.  

Logan spoke, his eyes still fixed on her “Dude I still hate you but..”

“Don't even gotta say it man, I know.” Colt replied.

“You guys coming?” Ellied called out. Logan took off running, Colt on his heels. Logan pushed him causing him to lose his balance. Colt stumbled over grabbing Logan's legs as he took him down with him. “Damnit Colt.” Logan grunted. “Don't fucking go there Logan, you pushed me.” he huffed as they scrambled to their feet.

They played around in the water for a while, each taking turns with Luca. Colt had her out in the water, teaching her how to wakeboard, while Logan and Ellie walked along the beach.  “So, tell me what you're thinking.” she noticed Logan's far off expression. “oh. Um nothing.” he shrugged her off. “Seriously Logan, its ok. It's a lot to take in, just tell me what you're thinking.” He stopped walking. “Luca is an amazing little girl. I never had a father, the closest thing to a dad I had was Kaneko. What if im not any good. The thought of being a parent is scaring the hell out of me.” Ellie tried not to let the sting of his confession effect her. He only just found out a few days ago, and it is a lot to process.  “I understand.”

“Hey,” He took her hand in his “I'm not saying I wouldn't be happy if she is mine, I would be over the moon. I would step up and take care of Luca and you. But, I am ok just being Uncle Logan too. If the odds don't end up weighing in my favor.”

Ellie smiled at him, he had been amazing throughout this whole thing so far, he was sweet, thoughtful, amazing and kind. She reached out cupping his cheek. “Thank you. You have no idea how great it is to hear that.”

Luca and Colt came up “Someone wants ice cream.” Colt announced as the eager little girl danced around in front of them. “How about uncle Logan takes you, is that ok?” Ellie stifled a laugh “Alrighty! Oh yeah! Come on uncle Logan.” she grabbed his hand pulling him towards the concession stand.

Colt gave her a confused look “Uncle Logan?” Ellie smiled and shook her head.  “He said he would be content being uncle Logan if she wasn't his.

“Huh. That's mighty big of him.” Colt looked down at the sand.

“Guess he is making light of this awkward situation,” she glanced over at the concession, watching logan carry Luca on his shoulders. “Speaking of, how are you adjusting. You've had less than 24 hours. Its a lot to process.”

“Me?” He pressed his fingers to his chest. “Im fine. Luca is a piece of work, just like her mother.”  Ellie giggled “So what about you? Do you think you could be Uncle Colt?” They walked along the waters edge.

“Well, that would be impossible since she's mine.” a smirk tugged on his lips.

“Colt, how are you so sure of this? I have had 6 years to wonder, and 5 of them looking at this little girl swearing one minute she's Logan's, and the other yours.” she started to become upset. the last thing he wanted to do was make her upset.

“Hey, El. Look at me,” He tilted her chin up with his finger. “I would be anything you needed me to be. Father,Uncle, friend. I would do anything you asked of me.” She stared into his deep brown eyes she knew he was telling the truth. She felt herself gravitating towards him, wanting so badly to press her lips against his.

She pulled away quickly, stopping herself from making a big mistake. “Colt..” She breathed out. “Give me a chance Ellie. Let me be the husband you deserve.”

Logan and Luca returned from the concessions, luca completely cover in chocolate Ice cream. “Ok, let's get you washed off, its about time to pack it up for the day.” Ellie reached for her hand leading her back to the water.  

They said their goodbyes as Ellie got Luca buckled into the car seat. Telling each of them they could catch up soon. As she drove away she looked at both Logan and Colt in the rearview. She was definitely lying when she said it wasn't about her. One wrong move and she could lose her heart to one-or both- of them again."

Tag:

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ROD

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[artificialqueens]

I'd lie and say that you were mine (Craquaria) - Otter

Hello, I’m Otter and uh, this is my first time posting here. Um, I was in a mood and decided to write this and I felt like sharing it so here it is! Just some Craquaria for you :)

Inspired by the song Lies by JANE XO

Also, if anyone does know who I am, I’d like to keep that a secret so please don’t tell anyone.

Hope you guys like this!

/ Oh it drives me mad,

You’re the best I never had /

Cracker watched from amongst the crown, hidden in plain sight, standing out while simultaneously blending in, watching as Aquaria continued to perform her heart out on stage, her face holding a look of concentration and excitement, a layer of sweat masking her face, making her glisten more than before when the light hit her face. It made her look angelic, purer than the whitest snow even.

Aquaria continued to perform, completely murdering the stage and capturing the hearts of the crowd in front of her, who collectively yet individually demanded attention from the being in front of them. A being who was worthy of all the praise in the world and so much more. A being who could be described with a countless words, words that Cracker had used so many times that she began coining phrases to describe Aquaria.

Cracker made her way backstage, draping herself across the sofa in Aquaria’s dressing room, waiting for the Italian beauty to come and grace Cracker with her presence. Cracker kept her eyes closed, losing herself in the faint sound of music that could be heard from where she was, followed by an eruption of cheers so loud, they could have drowned out an actual eruption. She hear the sound of a door opening and closing a few seconds later, followed the the sharp sound of Aquaria’s heels hitting the floor, each step sounding like it was made with a million calculations beforehand. Cracker felt a body settle on top of her, and her chin slightly being lifted by an all too familiar hand, one that was possibly cut and carved by god himself.

“Max, they loved me…” Aquaria breather, exhaustion and exhillieration both evident in her voice, placing a small kiss on Cracker’s jaw and setting her head down in the valley of Cracker’s shoulder.

‘Who wouldn’t?’ Cracker thought as she opened her eyes, letting them fall on the figure currently seated on top of her.

“You looked like a billion couldn’t afford you” Cracker murmured, causing Aquaria to lift her head, flashing a smile so bright it would have been able to blind a room full of people. Cracker returned it with a smile of her own, grasping Aquaria’s jaw softly, pulling the younger queen down towards her before their lips met in a soft but powerful kiss.

/ But I always had you through the night.

Did I go too far?

If I did then I was wrong /

Giovanni had woken up much before sunrise, letting his eyes scan over a room he had seen many times before, taking in every cut and corner for the hundredth time before he finally let his eyes fall onto the sleeping figure next to him.

Max lay there in all his glory, hair completely disheveled, lips slightly parted, his body steadily rising and falling with every breath he took, arm still firmly wrapped around Giovanni’s torso. He was at his most vulnerable and only Giovanni got to witness it. Giovanni felt himself lean into Max and he did nothing to try and stop himself.

Had it been anyone else, Giovanni would have probably got up and left a while ago, going on with his day, not giving a second thought to the previous nights incidents, but.. this was Max. Max was different, special, like a diamond amongst sand or a bird amongst dogs, and all Giovanni could do was stare. Stare at this beautiful man in front of him, not saying a word, too scared to rip through the silence.

And when the sunlight made its way through the windows, hitting Maxwell’s face in all the right areas, Giovanni swore no one could get any more beautiful. The sunlight made Max’ hair look like the finest of whiskey, his cheekbones shone and stood out and there was a perfect balance of light and shadow falling on his jawline.

Yet, the moment Max opened his eyes, Giovanni shut his, catching only a glimpse of the golden brown pools he would so desperately love to take a dip in.

“Well good morning to you too…” Max said and chuckled.

Max almost removed his arm from around Giovanni before noticing how the younger man was so contently tucked into his side, instead choosing to hold Giovanni tighter, earning a happy sigh from the younger man, his smile not going unnoticed by Max.

/ Should’ve known this happens everytime

When I thought we were just warming up you were turning so cold /

Max barely bothered getting ready tonight. Why would he? He choose to show up at the club in an old sweatshirt and a pair of baggy pants. Why should he make the effort? The pain of eyes that once searched the crowd just for him now avoided his face like the plague, numbers that were performed solely for him were now scrapped from performances entirely.

Max hadn’t slept in days, dark circles beginning to reside under his eyes and a growing beard made it completely evident. His attitude becoming increasingly lethargic and the personality was withering away, bit by bit, like a dandelion in the wind. All he could think about was Aquaria and Giovanni. Giovanni and Aquaria.

The one person who made these nights, these shows worthwhile. The one person who could turn bad days around with so much as a smile, making his entire day worth it when he caught so much as a glimpse of her. Aquaria and Giovanni

The one person he confided in, trusted, opened up to. The one person that knew every inch of his body and personality, the story behind every knick, scar and bad memory. The one person who he would call on sleepless nights, when he let his mind fill up with the darkest of thoughts. Giovanni and Aquaria.

And when they did finally make eye contact, all Max could read was a split second of pain and regret before they vanished, leaving Aquaria’s eyes stone cold again.

/ If I think I’m in love,

I’m the only one who’ll ever know /

8 months. 32 Weeks. 224 Days. 5376 Hours. Yet Giovanni kept refreshing his screen. His purpose? He wasn’t sure, he was waiting for the reply he knew would never come but the reply he so badly wanted. A drunk text, an accidental text, hell, even a text from Max saying how much he loathed Giovanni would has satisfied his urges and maybe even calmed his mind down a bit. But nothing ever showed up apart from the message that begun to haunt his life. The message that ended years worth of friendship. The message that ended one of the best relationships Giovanni ever had, and he besmirched it all with one text. Miz Cracker and Maxwell. Maxwell and Miz Cracker.

‘ I’m sorry, I can’t do this anymore, we can’t see each other. This whole age gap thing isn’t working and it just feels weird because people are starting to talk about it. We can’t continue, I’m sorry… ’

He read it once, twice, everyday from the day he sent it, and he broke on the inside every time he read it. He wanted to fix it, oh, he desperately wanted to fix it and if he could go back in time, he never would have sent the message at all. All he could think about was how much pain he must have cause to the one person he really, truly loved. Miz Cracker and Maxwell.

Giovanni wanted something to happen, something to get the back to the way they were before, all smiles and laughs. He was willing to do anything. Willing. Would he ever actually give in? This was the only question he didn’t have the answer to because where will plays a role, ego completely overpowers it. All he knew was he wanted Maxwell to come back. Maxwell and Miz Cracker.

/ Well maybe it was in my mind,

And if I ever told a lie,

I’d lie and say that you were mine /

Aquaria and Miz Cracker. Two names that flew off the tongue like birds of a feather now rolled off like spikes form the porcupine. Two names that once held love now held spite and vengeance.

Miz Cracker and Aquaria. Two names that were always seen together on any poster for any event now barely even wanted to be associated with each other, like two outcasted lions of a pride.

Max and Giovanni. Two people who were inseparable, joined at the hip as others would say, rarely being seen without each others company, now completely stayed away from each other as if they would suffer an allergic reaction if they got too close.

Giovanni and Max. Two people who told each other everything, from stupid mistakes, their darkest secrets and deepest desires, countless nights spent where one would take care of the other all vanished, like a cloud of smoke.

These were two people who loved each other, so much so that they broke each other. Two people who’s burning passion for each other burned them out on the inside. Two people who experienced the world with each other like they had never before… and they would give anything up to do it again.

/ Yeah you started this,

Took me down and I gave in /

Aquaria kept look over at the mirror, stealing glances of Miz Cracker whenever she could. The two hadn’t seen each other in almost a year and Aquaria found Cracker’s presence to be inviting yet overwhelming at the same time and she hated it. She hated that she felt this way around someone she loved. She hated that she couldn’t even bring herself to turn towards Miz Cracker. She hated that she was the one that made it this way.

“That wig doesn’t suit you girl…” Aquaria said, letting out a dry chuckle, hoping to lighten the air a bit.

“It doesn’t, doesn’t it?” Cracker replied softly, looking into the mirror and then at her feet.

“You’re losing your touch, maybe you should find another job…” Aquaria replied quickly, barely registering what Cracker had said.

“You’re probably right, I don’t know what I’m trying to achieve here…” Cracker said, starting to take her wig off, still not looking up, choosing to focus on the ground instead.

“Yeah- Wait what?”

“I said you’re right. I can’t even do my own job properly. I can’t style my wigs like I used to, my performances are lacklustre, my makeup isnt even mine anymore apparently. I don’t even know what I’m still trying to achieve. I mean, people are obviously tired of me, I don’t know why I still try, I’m just not good enough!.”

“Max, you’re good enough-”

“Don’t give me that bullshit, Gio,” Cracker spat, making Aquaria wince, “If I was, why would you suddenly leave? Because I wasn’t good enough for you, right? Was I really that bad? Was it really that bad to be associated with me? What was it, because clearly something about me wasn’t good enough for you if you choose to end it, because ‘people talked about us.’ Nothing I do is ever good enough for anyone anymore, not even myself!”

Aquaria just sat there shocked, mouth opening and closing like a goldfish. What Cracker just said had hit her hard, but nothing as hard as the last line, and the next thing she knew, she had engulfed the smaller queen in her arms. Miz Cracker was silently crying, staining Aquaria’s shirt, but her shirt was the least of her worries at the moment. Aquaria looked at the trembling figure in her arms as if Cracker could change the alignment of the planets at will, as if the being in her arms had single handedly created the universe as they knew it, and she began rubbing soothing circles into Cracker’s back, whispering strings of ‘You’re always good enough’ into her ear until Cracker eventually fell asleep, Aquaria still holding her like her life depended on it.

The two missed their performances and appearances, only being found by club staff at the end of the night, and neither of them could have been happier.

/ Said it’s over now you’re all over me /

Max lay across the sofa, Giovanni sprawled on top of him, with a blanket draped over them. Giovanni’s head lay on Maxwell’s chest and his arms were clasped around the older man’s torso. Max ran his fingers through Giovanni’s hair with one hand, the other drawing various patterns on Giovanni’s back, as the two continued to lie there in a comfortable silence, reruns of FRIENDS playing softly in the background.

They shifted only once so that Max was sat upright with Giovanni sitting against him, the younger man’s back to Maxwell’s chest. Max began humming, small vibrations travelling through his body, making Giovanni lean into his touch even more, as if Max was a drug and Giovanni couldn’t help but get addicted. Max snaked his arms around Giovanni, protectively holding him and looking at him as if he single handedly put all the stars in the sky.

“You know Gio,” Max started to say, earning a small hum from Giovanni, “If I ever told a lie, I’d lie and say that you were mine.”

“Doesn’t have to be a lie…”

“No?” Max said, looking down at Giovanni who was looking back at him with soft eyes.

“No.” Giovanni replied, leaning forward and sealing their conversation with a kiss.