#you thought i was done writing these lmao well SIKE

[madstronaut]

Reading: Guile & Guilt by @the-californicationist

oh hey there is that you GUILE&GUILT aka one of my favorite comfort fics that literally powered my two end-of-year [redacted] projects and also that [redacted] presentation and helped successfully launch the [redacted] campaign at work in December? the world willl not know BUT I DO and me and my marketing team at [redacted] salute you for your service, cali & ao3!! I think I’ve literally read this fic about 30+ times lmao

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, welcome to my stream-of-consciousness thoughts + a few (fuck jk who am i kidding a fuckton) of my favorite bits

- this has so so so many of my favorite tropes - forbidden romance, pretend dating, gonna give in just once (sike), guys who love going down on you, secret dating, YEARNING SO MUCH YEARNING, SHARING A BED, SHAKESPEAREAN SONNETS, Taking Care of Drunk!reader, impromptu fashion show?!fuckyes, misinterpretation+running away+Big Fucking Declaration of Love, talking about you in another language you don’t know, finishing each other’s sonnets!!!, scary older sister who can threaten her special forces brother, text thread chapters!!!, did I mention guys who love going dow-

- GAELIC NICKNAMES + THIEF THIEF THIEF THIEF (my dumb american ass spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to look up pronunciations on youtube and sound them out)

- soap’s sis aka reader’s bff warning her off from him? only for him fully suited up to find her wearing his shirt? is there a hotter fuckin meet-cute

- this was like the perfect mix of worldbuilding for me - fleshed out enough for me to step into and get lost in the best way, starting with the people surrounding both the reader and Soap - the reader was extremely relatable on an emotional level that I came to like her all on her own too and I was rooting for her in my head and the journey you are taken on in seeing Soap through her eyes - but ALSO the way she grows and blossoms tbh in the way she is seen by Soap AND by Pidge & co. is like just UNNNFFFFH storytelling climactic cathartic perfection for me - what is love if not to see, and be seen? anyway I’ll save waxing lyrical for reader & johnny ❤️

- there’s almost a part of me curious to see this whole story from Pidge’s POV - esp. when johnny says she kept reader away from him cos she knew he would like her - as someone who absolutely despises disappointing the people I love and have done metaphorical triple lutz backflips to avoid doing so I also deeply enjoyed the tension of reader going to pieces trying to reconcile Ye Ole How To Tell BFF I’m Fucked For (& Fucking) Her Brother AND found the ending confessions scenes so so so cathartic

- also really loved the ways reader & soap bonded over how well they each knew and loved pidge <3 the scene where johnny cries seeing reader present that shawl to her and the small and big ways reader is present in all the right ways for Pidgey totally made me tear up too - seeing someone you love love on your loved ones is such a special thing to see and I really hope it’s something everyone experiences ❤️

- the way soap’s gaze is described as basically drinking in the reader was probably one of the hottest things I’ve read - I basically re-lived how it felt to be looking at a crush and realize YOU ARE BEING LOOKED AT AS WELL - cali’s writing is basically like that scene where remy in ratatouille is shown experiencing food and flavors in 4D explosions in written form

- the little perv in me enjoyed the slightly dub-con of sleepy soap fingering reader on a cosmic and indescribable level, i knew that little shit wasn’t sleepfingering or whatever the equivalent of horny sleepwalking is and alternately this scene from soap’s pov would probably cause involuntary combustion, i dont make the rules here ok

-I went to my local sephora during lunch/coffee breaks trying to find the perfume/cologne equivalent of soap’s scent described here, that is how IRL feral this fic made me at one point…and also how i realized i do not like the scent of cloves lol

- hehehehehehe Stiff Peaks bakery

- the reader’s initial disbelief and difficulty in accepting johnny’s attraction to her - even though she notes all the little subtle tells - and her insecurity with the bekah/anjali/cherise crew is so so relatable and made me just want to alternately give her a huge hug but also at the same time do a grab her by the shoulders and give an intense pep talk complete with whiteboard erasable markered bullet points of ‘Yes You For Soap’ PLEASE See Section I, II, III, and articles A, B, C, and sub-articles 1, 2, 3, etc. etc. 

- “You regretted your decision to drag him out of the house again. You should’ve kept him all to yourself, covetous and selfish like a hoarder, locking him in like a shorn Repunzel, playing like Circe with her pigs. But, you didn’t want to be Circe. You wanted to be Penelope. Permanent, as impossible though it may have been. 

Was he Odysseus? Or Narcissus?” is one of my favorite lines in this story. books on greek mythology were the first I ever picked up as a kid in my local library growing up and reading the odyssey in high school made these references just *CHEFS KISS*

- ProjectRunawayJudgeAU!Johnny makes an appearance and I’ll just leave this quote here: ““Creepin’ Jesus! You look like if 1982 was a person, lass. Back in the room with you, mhèirleach! Christ Almighty.”

- reader & soap’s “promise” text exchanges - even when they weren’t talking -  are dipped in resin for preservation and carefully wrapped and locked away in a china cabinet in a warm and cozy and safe corner of my hearthouse, to be taken out and ruminated over on tough days for me

- I could literally hear in my head 141 mocking soap when they were singsonging the sonnet they all ended up memorizing and laughed my ass off for a good 5 min when i first read this

- another favorite verse simply because of the AUDACITY of cali to juxtapose sex+sacredness+implying soap is basically worshipping reader with his dick - “melting into you with a slick slide, trusting you implicitly, believing you like a disciple. “

- i may be a leetle bit pervy but also a big fuckin softie and I also teared a bit at johnny’s tenderness at caring for reader/141 being so happy for johnny post-apartment romp, and also at price both being there/giving space to reader when she and johnny weren’t talking ❤️

- also sidenote ahem the pricethirst that gripped my throat out of nowhere at these two sentences AND him fishing out the dogtags-

“Price held the coin up to you like the sacrament, discovering your shame, bringing your sin out into the open. In that moment, you wanted to bend down on both knees and take it into your mouth, and you wanted him to make you whole again with it. “

- I had the most delicious privilege of seeing the fics go live each chapter at a time towards the end and I gasped and screamed out loud like when I used to watch LOST episodes air live lol - those Pidge vs. Johnny arguments about his service esp. when he CALLED HER BRIGETTE had me getting up to take a walk around the house before I could continue reading lol THE DRAMA!!!! yesyesyes I felt like I was the audience in a Jerry Springer episode here

- “Ghost spoke at full volume, not caring who heard him,” this line took me out for a full minute, big “THAT’LL DO” vibes iykyk and of course him being the one to point out the mic still being on was just *CHEFS KISS* PERFECTION

- literally my entire body went up in goosebumps the first time i finished reading the scene of the mic still being on and I just kept saying OH GOD PIDGE SHE KNOWS PIDGE! FUCK! PIDGE FUCK OH NO OH GOD for a good 10 minutes

- tbh i would read a Big Slut Choir Boy Johnny fic

- fun fact, I learned what a sporran is thanks to this fic! truly, thank you fanfiction for statistically increasing my vocabulary 4000%

- now i love me the many many flavors of all the different alternate versions of soap across fanfic (pouring one out for all my fanfic writers rn) but G&G’s soap has a special place in my heart in how cali both captured his character in the games story/campaign modes and took his best and most memorable traits and built on them in the best way possible on his journey in falling for the reader and esp. in him talking about his dreams and future plans with her, esp. in light of his fate in MWIII… if you’ve ever loved someone and not had it work out and had to let them go and not only grieve their loss but the dreams and hopes and futures and the potential of everything they/we could have been, and wondered… what if? I found something very tender and healing for me in a personal way in this Johnny Lives, Loves, and Is Loved story ❤️

i made literally a throwaway paragraph comment on how this was one of my comfort fics and cali wrote one of the most beautiful nonfiction pieces of writing I’ve read in fandom (and tbh outside of fandom?!) on basically like, the heart and soul of fanfic and I encourage everyone to give it a read here (https://www.tumblr.com/the-californicationist/738127290521829376/madstronaut-this-is-one-of-the-nicest-things) and let it fill you with a warm glow like it does for me everytime I recall it ❤️

The Challenge: Comment on every fanfic you read and enjoy in the month of January.

Every chapter. Every one shot. Every drabble. Every ficlet. Whether it’s on a personal website, a blog, or an archive. Whether you’ve read it a hundred times before or you’re reading it for the first time. Whether the fic was posted years ago or minutes ago. Whether you sign your name or leave your thoughts anonymously. Whether your comment is paragraphs in length or a few short words. Comment on every fanfic you read and enjoy in the month of January.

The Philosophy: Comments are what keep a fandom thriving and growing.

We don’t see comments as a transaction. They’re not a price paid for reading a fic. We see comments as an interaction, a way of building relationships. Comments are a courtesy, not a currency. [x]

Fandom is a relationship between dozens,hundreds, thousands, maybe millions of fans, and the only way for the greater fandom relationship to function, is for those fans to interact. One way to interact is by writing and reading fanfic. A writer prompts an interaction by posting their work; it is up to the reader to then acknowledge (or not acknowledge).

As one of our favorite blogs, @ao3commentoftheday​, said: [x]

“Comment if you can, but don’t be bullied or pressured into it. A comment should be written in the same spirit as the fic itself: wanting to reach out to other people who love the same fandom as you do. It’s not easy to do that, I know, and I don’t hold it against you at all if you can’t.”

The Only Rule: Be kind.

Be kind to your fandoms’ writers.

Please note that this challenge is to “comment on every fanfic you read and enjoy in the month of January.” As our fandom forebears were fond of saying, “Don’t like, don’t read.” For FaFiCoWriMo, we have taken that one step further by saying, “Don’t like, don’t comment.”

No matter how well-intentioned, critique is useless unless it comes from a place of trust. Unless you know an author personally and they have specifically asked for your critique, please keep it to yourself.

It costs zero of your currency and zero of your time to not be a jerk.

Be kind to yourself.

If you do find yourself unable to comment on every fic (for whatever reason), remember this: we forgive you, zero judgement. [x]

[cielsosinfel]

I haven't done a reading log update in a while, but that's mostly because I have been struggling to finish books for the last few months (finish much of anything tbh. College and volunteering keeping me busy)

Some books I've finished mostly-recently:

Kindred by Butler: I found this a lot more meaningful a read than Parable. The characters and their relationships carry the entire story, which is... a lot different than Parable lol. And it opens SO STRONGLY. It's harrowing, and painful, and masterfully paced, and I love the main character Dana so, so much. I don't feel like I can speak much on this book considering the subject matter, but I do think it is one of the most thoughtfully written novels about trauma bonding (in a VERY specific context of Black people living under white supremacy and colonialism , and slavery in specific) I have read.

Jamaica Inn by du Maurier: I finished this like, yesterday, and I have mixed thoughts. When I first started reading it I was super engaged and speeding through it- it has all the baggage you'd expect from a white upper-class writer from 1930s Britain, but I liked the flow of the prose, and I really liked Mary as a protagonist, her drive toward action and her response to trauma, to the trauma her aunt is going through (though I also have thoughts there about the number of times her aunt is compared to a child.) I did think it was interesting that the novel is basically about the misogyny women must live through from men, even while it's bogged down by the author's own misogyny unquestioningly regurgitated as basic truths throughout the text.

But the last bit was just kind of ehhhh. There's a lot of very uncomfortable ideas around "evilness" being an immutable quality you are born with, something genetic (the Merlyns... even though Mary rides off with Jem Merlyn in the end, the fact he's "tainted" by his bloodline is never really contested, she just decides she'd rather risk the unpredictability of life with a criminal man that go back to the comfort and safety of her birth village), and (visible) disability being a sign of "evilness" and depravity (what the FUCK was up with the plot twist with the albino pastor being a secret evil pagan lmao lmao I thought it was interesting he was being framed as sexually predatory given he was the religious leader of a village and well-respected, albeit also impossible to trust due to the albinism being "sinister" and "abnormal" and "inhuman," but then sike, he's just an evil pagan wannabe. I guess to a contemporary reader the albinism alone would have been a sign he's not a truly moral upstanding Christian like he tries to appear as? idk)

Also there's a lot of racist elements to how Mary's uncle is described on top of the "he's evil because his father was evil because his father was evil etc" shit. (He's a white Brit but the language used....) and there are like several really erotically charged scenes where he shows mary how easy it'd be for him to sexually violate her, which is, well, something.

i don't regret reading it, I think it did illuminate a lot of why some trends in M/F romantic fiction exist. but jeez. a lot of thoughts.

i always writ ethe most about books i didn't like!!!

I've also been reading a lot of books about... whaling lol specifically in the context of 19th century US history.

The one book I finished was:

Black Hands, White Sails: The Story of African-American Whalers by Patricia McKissack and Frederick McKissack: TBH I only finished this because it's very short. I didn't realize it was "juvenile nonfiction" when I checked it out (not surprising actually, Patricia McKissack was a famous children's book author and wrote some of MY favorite childhood Royal Diaries books), so the writing is very simple, brief, doesn't go into too much detail about anything, and does try to present history almost like a storybook "narrative" to keep a child reader's attention. It's not badly written but it was not what I was hoping for or really want to read as an adult lol

I do think this was a good introduction to a history I have never once read about though- that is, the history of African-American men and women in the US whaling industry, how the whaling industry was inextricably linked to the Trans-Atlantic slave trade and also to abolition efforts, and the little-acknowledged-in-the-modern-day racial, ethnic and cultural diversity of whaling crews. It was one of the few occupations willing to hire free Black Americans, and also one of the few that people who escaped slavery had a chance of being hired onto with little questions asked (heavily due to the fact the early whaling industry formed in Nantucket which was a Quaker stronghold. And also heavily due to the fact they basically had to put up with insane amounts of economic exploitation if they didn't want to end up back in slavery.)

I think this is also a good intro to whaling as an industry in general. And it has a very good bibliography.

Besides this, I checked out a bunch of ancient tomes from the 1920s or earlier about whaling history from the public library, and some primary sources from my college's library (the journal of Mary Chapman Lawrence, a "whaling wife," and the journal of Nelson Cole Haley, a harpooner.) But I have... not made much progress on them cus I'm bogged down on other things. oops.

[heyitsyn]

Manager!Seijoh Part 4

a/n: I LIVE FOR THESE MANAGER SEIJOH ASKS LIKE BLS TAKE OVER MY LIFE

(i originally planned to write the other schools for the manager scenario like theyre already in my drafts with plans and partly written out but like seijoh is my TOP PRIORITY (sorry pls dont hate me) BC THEY ARE MY BOIS)

also, most of my ask box is all for a kyoken ending and kyoken fluff and aoba johsai fluff and im quaking bc this is spurring me to create more aoba johsai imagines and my love for the other schools is just like being overshadowed by our little plant babies :’)

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

anon request: Im the anon who mentioned the chaos about the dating and can I say I love it!!! 🙏🙏 i kinda have this hc for the boys that they fight whenever they go on bus rides, just because they want yn to sit next to them. But she usually sits next to the calmer members?? The reason the boys fight?? She may or may not have fallen asleep a few times, her head on kyo/iwa shoulder. 🥺🥺

LMAO THAT PART JUST REEKED CHAOTIC ENERGY AND SHE WOULD TOTALLY SIT NEXT TO THEM JUST TO SPITE THE OTHERS AND I LOVE THE IRONY LIKE THE MOST AGGRESSIVE LOOKING ARE THE SOFTEST AND CALMEST TOWARDS HER LIKE PLEASE KYOKEN AND IWA ARE JUST LITTLE SOFT BEANS AND DESERVE THE WORLD

(bruh im so soft for iwa and kyo like my best bois and i must write them out IMMEDIATELY bc theyre so uggghhhhhh!!!!!!!)

MY TWO MEN IN ONE GIF GOD HAS BLESSED ME-

oh dear

bus rides,,,,, yep here we go

the team is usually peaceful and civil w each other (minus iwa literally beating oiks up but thats irrelevant information)

like they dont really have fights or have any arguments bc they meet up every saturday to talk about the week and if anybody had any concerns or anything they were mad about since it was like a family meeting

but boy oh boy

when you entered this family,,, arguments and misunderstandings happened once a week

‘no! y/n-chan said she was going to go shopping with me!’

‘um, she already agreed to go to to the arcade w me’

‘wait, she told me we were going to go visit that cafe!’

yes you agreed to do those things w them but you never assigned a date

your attention was something that these boys were always wanting since they only see you during club hours and practices

their jealousy gets really ugly sometimes and the two first years actually get all smug about it 

‘hm, y/n, we still up for studying later?’

you ruffled his hair and smiled up at him

‘yep! we need to set an alarm though or else i’d end up staying after 1 in the morning again’

‘great. cant wait’

kunimi rarely shows any emotion towards his senpais but they couldnt miss the smug smirk that made oikawa grip the volleyball and mattsun holding him back

god hes such a little shite

everyone knows that the first years have a upperhand than them bc of your same grade so the upperclassmen were much more sensitive to spending time with you outside of practice

and they liked to spend that time wisely

when the time for away games come, you weren’t that worried about it

i mean,, why would you when boarding the bus is going to be so early in the morning at like 4 in the morning and theyd be sleeping the whole time so you get peace and quiet

in fact, you were looking forward!

but nope!

jesus took the wheel and said no

instead, you were watching the team members shouting and yelling at each other at the asscrack of dawn

say sike rn

the 2 coaches were actually not there yet so they werent able to help you and whip the boys to order so here you were, bleary eyed and clearly still tired, sighing and rolling your eyes at the fight

‘SHE SITS WITH ME! IM TEAM CAPTAIN! I GET DIBS!’

‘NO! YOU DROOL ON HER AND MESS UP HER CLOTHES! YOU LIKE MAKKI-SENPAI MORE, RIGHT, Y/N-CHAN?!’

now you might be asking me, ‘author-chan, why are they fighting so hard for something as simple as a bus ride?’

well, my young grasshoppers, this is not just a simple bus ride

you are infamous in the team to be a sleeper

no matter what form of transportation, bus, car, any surface, you found yourself in dream land

yall i wish i was like that

the sleep paralysis demon beside my bed says otherwise

they freak out and fight over even a simple touch of affection from you, do you really think they wouldnt fight tooth and nail to being your pillow and freely watching your adorable sleeping face?

these men are fighting as if they were fighting something serious like a world war

lmao with how intensely theyre fighting, it practically is

but there were two players who actually didnt care either way since they only wanted you to be the most comfortable and they werent exactly the most squishiest members

in fact, they were basically all muscle and probably not the most comfortable

NOPE I BELIEVE THAT IWA IS IN FACT ONE OF THE MOST COMFIEST AND BEST PILLOWS IN THE ENTIRE HAIKYUU UNIVERSE

totally not my bias talking or anything

so it was no surprise when they didnt get themselves involved

iwa was already done w them and goes in the bus because mom deserves a nap

naturally, kyo follows the leader and boards the bus after him, leaving the others to fight it out in the school parking lot

you were happy that they were too distracted that they wouldnt notice you sneaking away into the bus and you were slightly disappointed that out of all the seats, kyo had to sit in the one-seater by the front

so you immediately went over to the other person, who was iwa-san, and he was just settling in, pulling out his teal blanket

you blinked at him when he caught you stare but he gently smiled before opening the blanket

‘i was never a fan of window seats anyways’

you happily bounced over to him and you placed your bag at the overhead compartment bc seijoh is bougee and can afford everything before you climbed over him to the seat next to the window

iwaizumi tried to make you as comfortable as he can so he kept the seat divider thing yanno what im talking about? between you

but his eyes widened when you casually pulled it up and snuggled closer to him

youve done this before so he opened his right arm for you to cuddle closer but he was still surprised 

meanwhile,,,

you just closed your eyes with a smile as you pulled the blanket to your chin and practically glomped yourself to iwa

ugh im so jealous of you!!!!!!!!!!

‘hmmmm, youre so warm iwa-san. youre like,,,,, jacob from twilight’

his eyebrow quirked and he smiled, wrapping his arm around you and tightly holding you close

‘oh? the werewolf?’

he felt your head nod

‘mhm. so warm, and strong, yet so gentle and soft’

by now, both your legs were already swung over his lap and head on his chest as you sat sideways

his fingers traced circles around your middle as his other hand was fiddling with your fingers

‘didnt he like mark a little girl?’

‘iwa-san dont talk about that!’

his laugh grumbled his chest and you giggled, trying to become even closer towards his naturally warm chest and inhale his scent

lavender mixed with peppermint

it was such an odd combination from the people you knew and you were immediately drawn to it

thats why you usually wore his jacket rather than your own

he always gets confused as to where it is but you steal it and watch him look for it

you didnt hear that from me though

it didnt take a long time for you to fall asleep and by the time the 2 coaches finally arrived and yelled at the players, they were already late

‘oikawa, i thought youd handle this properly!’

oiks whimpered from the coach’s scolding but apologized then pushed everyone in

the sight in front of them made them both boil in jealousy and squeal in uwus

you, the softest and sweetest and kindest little flower human being, being cuddled up to iwaizumi, the brute and bara arms and the ultra macho strong man, who had his head on top of you

KYAAAAAAAA

even though they knew you were a heavy sleeper and iwa slept like a rock, they still quieted down and silently walked over to their seats, hissing and shushing at anyone who even made the slightest bit of noise

rustle of the bags?

SSSSHHHHHH

seat creaking as they sit down?

SSSHHHHHHHH

they only let this slide bc your sleeping face was just so cute and they didnt have the heart to wake you up

and also face the wrath of titan iwa and be thrown into the atlantic ocean like oikawa did one time

when you finally arrived at the stadium, they waited for a rough 10 minutes just to figure out how to wake you up

they didnt want to wake up iwa first and have him yell at them but they didnt want to wake you up first either

but kyo didnt understand the dilemma and instead just goes to the back where yall were at and he goes to the seat behind you so he could reach you easily and tickles your cheek

the team is just like 👁️👄👁️

your nose scrunches at this tingling sensation until it continues so you open your eyes and finds kyo just smiling down at you

oiks is literally shaking bc he could see the smallest smile on kyo’s face

‘wake up’

with his gruff voice, it sounded like he was ordering you around but you knew he couldnt help it and blinked tiredly at him, giving him a smile of your own

‘hm, hi kyo-san’

you winced at the sudden appearance of the sunlight and that made you fully wake up before flinched at the eyes of the other players

‘hello, everyone’

you said slowly and you sat up, noticing iwa still sleeping

oiks held his breath bc hes been friends w iwa since he was still a baby and he knows that its like waking up a sleeping dragon

‘wait y/n-chan-’

but you didnt listen and poked his nose

‘iwa-san? iwa-san, we’re here’

you cooed and the poking made his eyes flutter open and with his head still tilted to the side, he swore he saw an angel by the way the sunlight hit the back of your head giving you a smiling angel effect

hm, i could get used to seeing this when i wake up

you grinned and when he finally stretched, you sat up stright, waiting for iwa to get up so you could slide out

but kyo was an impatient little bean and just hoisted you out of there and towards him behind the seat

‘come on. i got your bag’

he mumbled and you nodded, letting him hold your hand

lmao wait i forgot the time this is set

this is set during the 2nd inter-high okay? okay

oiks was still complaining at kyo and iwa hogging you but you didnt listen and continued walking towards the entrance, glancing around at the other teams

as usual, oiks and iwa were walking to the front bc yanno, captain and vice-captain, while you and kyo walked at the back, mainly bc you didnt want any player to stray off like kindaichi did last time and look for him for hours

kyo gripped your hand and you turned your head to look at him to see his eyes glaring at anything

you chuckled which made him look down at you, the glare slowly disappearing

‘hm, kyo-san, you should really invest in contacts. it doesnt matter if wearing glasses makes you feel like a nerd bc you still need it to see’

he scrunched his nose when you scolded him and he was about to retort when him and the team caught the whisperings of the nearby teams

‘oh my god, seijoh and the beautiful manager’

‘how old is she? i hope shes at least a second year’

‘ngh id tap that’

IM BLEEHHHHH

‘is he her boyfriend? if so, the competition isnt that hard then’

kyo growled and was about to lunge at the yellow jacketed boy but you held him back, also worriedly looking at your boys

‘seijoh, down’

you ordered and they shrunk back, opting to just glaring heatedly at the other teams

you could still feel kyo shaking at rage to them sexualizing you but your hands squeezing him and the other hand rubbing his arm helped him control it

‘dont make a scene, kyo-san. its your first competition since your suspension, right? and you love volleyball so please keep it in. i can protect myself’

you whispered but he let go of your hand and wrapped his arm around your shoulder, pulling you close and continuing to glare at everyone as if he was asserting dominance

‘if they touch you-’

‘ill kick them between the legs, i know. you told me already’

you teased and he hummed in agreement

when they played, they were at ease bc the two coaches were there and they were also protective of you like their own so they wouldnt have to worry about someone to go after you

however,,

as they were warming up for the second game, you had to quickly fill up their water bottles bc they were already tired and dehydrated so you needed to fill them up

and they were all busy and you didnt want to bother them and you were going to be quick anyways so you just took the case of bottles and ran to the nearby water fountain

you were hurriedly filling them up and at your last bottle, you were about to cap it when you felt a presence behind you

he stood close and his arms snaked around your waist but you hurriedly tightened the lid and whacked him at the head with the heavy bottle

you continuously hit him and kicked him between the legs before hitting him again

‘DONT TOUCH ME AGAIN!’

you shouted and iwa and kyo were watching from the end of the hallway, panting from running so fast since they heard your shouts

okay a little flashback,

kyo was watching you from his perepharal vision and when he went up to spike, he took his eyes off of you for ONE DAMN SECOND and you nyoomed out of there

when he didnt see you anywhere, he wildly looked around and this caught the attention of the vice-captain

‘oi! kyotani! whats wrong?’

‘y/n. where is she?’

they took off running and the team was just like what

then they heard shouts and kyo knew it was you

his mad dog senses

hehe get it

he as about to tackle the guy but he saw you beat him with a water bottle and eventually taking another bottle and kicking him and hitting him with the two waters

the player cowered and scrambled to get away bc wow this girl was psycho

um no sir, she was protecting herself from hormonal testosterone filled children like you

‘YEA GO RUNNING! COME TO ME AGAIN AND ILL BEAT YOU UP HARDER! DISGUSTING! TRASH! GROSS! SCUM!’

maybe it was because the last time you were touched without consent was when you got bullied but you were definitely fighting harder and more aggressive at protecting yourself

you turned around and the rage from your eyes disappeared when you saw the two boys there

‘hey iwa-san! kyo-san! sorry, i needed to fill the water bottles!’

you grinned and placed the bottles back to the case before lugging it up

my god their eyes were shining

yep, thats my girl

when their games were over for the day, they made their way to the exit where the bus was at and you and kyo stayed behind again

you caught the eye of the guy and his team and you and kyo glared at him, both wearing a sadistic smile

UGH YALL ARE COUPLE GOALS I SWEAR

kyo even went up to him and the team shrunk leaving the guy standing there in fear at the look on his face

‘listen, i dont like it when my baby girl gets touched by filthy shite like you. so do it again, and ill chop those damn fingers of yours, got it?’

lmao he’ll come for your ankles

the guy just nodded in fear while his team were cowering at the back

you chuckled and pulled kyo to go bc as much as you liked watching this, you needed to go to the bus to go home

‘cmon, kyo, i want to go. im getting a headache from the smell of garbage’

he shifted his gaze to you and sent you a soft smile

‘okay. lets go’

hah you thought it ends there?

kyo is a dramatic little shite so he made a show of grabbing your waist and kissing your temple before flashing them a finger

oiks was tapping his foot impatiently at the bus and when you and kyo emerged from the entrace, he was about to snatch you up but kyo stood in front of you

‘EH?! KYOKEN-CHAN, I WANT TO SIT WITH Y/N-CHAN!’

‘no’

he said and didnt say anything else as he pulled you to the bus and into a two seater where you sat at the window again and he sat on the outside

‘hah? you want to sit next to me, kyo-san?’

you teased but he flushed red, hurriedly hiding in your neck

you laughed and brought a hand up to caress his nape

‘mhm’

he mumbled and you pursed your lips to hide the squeal

‘youre so cute, kyo-san’

‘not cute’

‘very cute’

‘no’

‘AM I CUTE Y/N-CHAN?’

‘SHUT UP SHITTYKAWA’

kyoken got away from your neck and went to hit the captain 

oikawa screamed

a/n: my first week of school was so weird bc we only have like 2 days and the other days are just free days bc we havent really done anything except talk about our classes but im just hating this system like ugh i actually want to go to school bc ya girl is going to a tech school and this 2-day a week is not the vibe

[su-univeralai]

MAILEE???? AS PARENTS???? Tell us more Su.

Ok, Joy, so I was thinking about this a lot last night, and had originally thought that they would have 3 biological kids, Mai and Ty Lee get different sperm donors. Mai would get pregnant first and have a girl, and then Ty Lee would have twin boys. They would also foster orphans and teach them etiquette and how to defend themselves (but I'm not going to include them since they're only there until they age out of the system with some dope skills, or are adopted)

BUT THEN!!!

I thought.... Ty Lee is 1 or 7 identical sisters WHAT IF instead of having twin boys, she had like quintuplet (5) boys!!! But she gave them all very different names and made them do very different activities so they were their own people, unlike how she felt with her sisters. Of course the five of them would end up forming some sort of group gymnastics team or something so they could spend more time together.

IDK Joy! I'm conflicted on which route I wanna take. I'll lay both groups of kids out for you (and anyone else who's interested) and y'all can help decide which Mai Lee family will make the cut lmao.

Also going to put a cut here because... well this is gonna get looong

Yaisha (F) Firebender, 29: Yaisha is Mai's biological child, yet very much has personality close to her Titi (Ty Lee). She isn't a very skilled firebender when she starts, but cousin Ichika (Azula's daughter), trains her to become a pretty an average bender before heading off to the Royal Fire Academy for Girls. She latches onto Kya (steambaby) who is 3 years older than her and they become close like sisters. Seeing that Yaisha isn't the strongest bender, she is also taught dagger throwing, which she excels at like Mama. Although her firebending skills are quite avaerage, she uses them masterfully in the kitchen, specifically as a baker. She ends up marrying an earthbender at some point in the future (I have no other info on this dude yet, sorry lmao) and they settle down in Ba Sing Se and open a pastry shop next to the Jasmine Dragon.

Yaisha is there in both iterations of my idea. The rest of these OCs will be split between Ty Lee having twin earthbending boys (bc her sperm donor was an earthbender) or two firebenders, an earthbender, and two non-bender quintuplets.

Twins:

Siju and Dizai (M) Earthbenders, 27: Siju and Dizai are pretty skilled earthbenders for people who live in the Fire Nation without any proper training. While Yaisha trains at the Royal Fire Academy for Girls, the twins are shipped off to train with Toph. The twins get super close with Suyin they become a trio until Su gets sent to Gao Ling to live with her grandparents. Siju is quite a skilled metalbender, but Dizai turns out to be a lavabender. Once they hone their skills, both of them come home to show Mama and Titi their skills. Everyone is very impressed.

Siju stays home and meets a midranking officer in the Fire Navy and they fall in love.

Dizai travels around the world and meets Sokka and Suki's daughter, Alayi. Even though Dizai is 6 years younger than Alayi, the two fall in love and settle in the SWT where Alayi wants to teach the new waterbenders how to master their element. Together, they have two children, an earthbender and a firebender.

Quintuplets:

Jaree (M) Non-Bender, 20: Jaree is a skilled chi blocker like Titi, but is also interested in welding. He becomes the youngest and best-known welder in the world but the age of 15. People come from all over the world to get beautifully designed weapons made by the boy. Jaree makes customized weapons for his Mama and Zaija on a regular basis as 'practice'. When he turns 18, he only does commissions because he enjoyed spending his time with his brothers dancing and messing around.

Zaija (M) Non-Bender, 20: Zaija on the other hand, takes after his Mama and is a skilled thrower. Jaree makes customized throwing stars, daggers, knives, etc for him. They are perfectly balanced and ensures that he never misses his target. when he's not small weapons and going on top secret missions for Shushu Zuko, he writes under the name Wang Fire (courtesy of Sokka). Wang Fire is the best-selling author for teen dramas. Only Sokka knows his secret.

Mozu (M) Firebender, 20: Mozu is an awful combat firebender, but he's very skilled in firebending as a healing art. He studies under the Bhanti sages to learn how to energy read with firebending. From there he learns the power of Reiki and massage therapy to heal people. Mozu and Shain start a healing business together, as Shain is a skilled acupuncturist and acupressurist. In his small amount of free time, he likes to study teas. Eventually, after the quintuplets stop competing, Mozu goes to help Iroh in Ba Sing Se at the tea shop.

Yaro (M) Firebender, 20: Where Mozu could barely fight, Yaro excels. Yaro is sent to the Sun Warriors to learn firebending from Ran and Shaw. After returning, he makes it his life mission to learn how to control the colors of his fire. By 17, he is able to create any color flame he wants. He explores how different things react based on the different temperatures and colors the flames are. Yaro becomes a potter, creating unique bowls, plates, etc for the nobles. He and Jaree open a gallery together to sell their masterpieces.

Shain (M) Earthbender, 20: Shain is the odd man out, being the only earthbender in the family. He is sent to train with Ayi Toph and discovers he's a very skilled metalbender. Between his metalbending abilities and knowledge of muscles and pressure points, Shain creates a better way of doing acupuncture than the experts have done for the past 300 years. Shain spends one season each year in Zaofu with Suyin and Bataar to better his metalbending and teach other metalbenders his acupuncture technique.

The five of them are all super flexible and able to get some height when jumping. They form a gymnastics and dance troupe of the five of them. They compete in the group version of bending dance competitions that Tiao Wu does. He's a big fan of them and is always siked when they let him dance with them.

OK! Here is a much longer than I intended answer to your Mai Lee babies ask. Please let me know what you think and which direction you think I should go because both would be interesting to have.

[lonelyreputation]

Cross The Line

A/N: Hiiii!! I know I said I would be posting angst next, but ha! Sike!!! Here’s a SMUT piece for ya! Ha! To the anon who requested this––So sorry that it's been so long  sljdflksd writing takes me a while and then you add smut (well, I added it in lmao) into the mix I tend to overthink alksjfld Keep your eyes peeled for some new fics!! I have a new chapter of C’est Toi, Different, and some other ones coming next week!

As always, let me know what you guys thought!! 💫 💗 Thank you to everyone for your immensely kind words!!! My heart is always filled to the brim with kindness by you lot 🥺

REQUEST: Stylist!ReaderxShawn // Friends to Something More

Let’s Chat!! | MASTERLIST

Warnings: SMUT!!! LIKE ALL THE WAY SMUT THIS TIME!! AHH!!! 

Word Count: 7.2K

-

The excitement backstage was nothing like you had felt before.  After coming off a successful European leg of tour, with a two month break, everyone was reenergized.  Stagehands were high-fiving the merchandise team, the lighting director was laughing with the audio technician, and Andrew was playing tag with the band.

You were leaned up against the back wall with Connor, discretely listening in on Shawn’s fan Q&A before the show.

“What’s your favorite outfit that Y/n’s put together for you?”

At the sound of your name your postured straightened and Connor nudged an elbow into your stomach.  You turned your head to the side and whispered a harsh keep your hands to yourself.

“That’s not what you told Shawn the night of the last London show.”

You whipped your head to look at Connor, eyes wide, “You swore to never bring that up again.”

Connor’s smirk only widened as he turned his head back to face Shawn.  You followed his gaze and saw that he was looking down and twirling the white rose he held between his fingers, “Um…I liked the VMA outfit she dressed me in––The green suit.”

The crowd aww’d at his shyness while some let out little shrieks of joy as they clutched their friend’s hand.  Once Shawn looked up from the rose, cheeks nice and red, his eyes automatically landed on you in the back.  He offered you a secret smile as you shot your head down to look at your feet; both knowing exactly how that night ended with his suit on the floor.

“Did you miss her the most when you went on break?”

Connor nudged his elbow into your side again, and before you could silently tell him off again, Shawn’s soothing voice captured your attention.

“I mean yeah, sure––I––“ he was cut off by even more shrill screams of the fans when he admitted to missing you.  The fans sounded exactly how you felt on the inside, “––Of course I missed her, she’s one of my best friends,” more shrill screaming, “And like––I––I missed everyone––Connor, Andrew, Cez–––“

“But you missed her the most, right?”

Shawn’s eyes momentarily connected with yours for a minute before moving his soft eyes to meet the fan who cut him off, “I think it’s time for me to get ready for the show.”

With his avoidance of the question, the fans only squealed more––taking it as confirmation that yes, he did miss you the most––and Connor nudged your side once more.  You shot him a glare as you pushed yourself off from the wall with your foot.

“Some of us have to actually work, Connor.”

He let out a stifle of a laugh and shot you yet another mischievous glance, “I’m sure you’ll get plenty of work done dressing him down before the show.”

Connor scurried away out the door and down the hall as you stood in the back with your mouth hung open.  Sure, you and Shawn had some sort of relationship that challenged the line of friends or more, but he was your boss and you were his employee.  

Everyone turned a blind eye whenever Shawn threw an arm around you, pulled you in close to his side, and pressed a prolonged kiss to your cheek.  And everyone ignored you when you took extra time buttoning up his shirt.  Everyone––the fans, the crew, even Andrew––was conscious about the peculiar dynamic between the two of you, but no one ever said anything because you two knew not to never cross that line.

Shawn took a chance hiring you with only minimal experience on your resumé, fresh out of university with a fashion merchandising degree.  It started with shy smiles and Shawn bringing you a cup of tea made to your liking every time he saw you.  Then the nervous laughter turned into longing stares as he looked down at you shining his shoes.  And finally, after fixing the collar of his shirt, when you let your hands rest on his chest for a few seconds longer than normal, he ducked his head and kissed you.

It was quick.  A soft press of his lips against yours that happened so fast you didn’t process what had happened until he was a rambling mess in front of you.  He apologized at least a hundred times: I’m so so sorry, Y/n––I don’t know what I was thinking––I just thought that you––And I––I thought there was something between us––I’m so sorry––I crossed a line.

You let him collect his final thoughts as he let out a deep sigh of embarrassment, turning on his heels to dart out of the room and hide until the end of time, but you took hold of his hand before he could take a step away from you.  The seconds you held his hand gently in yours felt like hours as you held your breath.

You remembered how thick the air was with tension.  All of the secret glances and private touches led up to this moment.  With a shaky breath, you let out a whisper that rang through both of your ears, I think I feel something, too.

Not even a second later, Shawn took your face in both of his hands as he pressed a hard kiss to your lips.  It was everything a first kiss with someone new was; noses bumping against each other, a few awkward teeth clanks, and accelerated heart rates.  But with more time exploring one another, the two of you knew exactly what the other enjoyed between the sheets.

You were walking down the hall, on your way to Shawn’s dressing room, when a strong arm draped around your shoulder.  You felt a smile tug at the corner of your lips, knowing exactly who it was, as they fell into sync with your walking pace.

“What’s the hurry, roadie?”

You rolled your eyes at the nickname Shawn bestowed on you when you told him the horror story of telling your parents you would be traveling to work for him.  So, like a roadie? Your mother had said with a twinge of disdain in her voice, not fully believing that this was neither a viable source of income nor a stable career.

You brought an arm to wrap around his waist, “Just on my way to dress up a client.”

“Must be a pretty important client if you’re walking that fast.”

“Well,” you peered up at him and saw that he was looking straight forward with a smirk on his face, “Was maybe hoping to just have some time alone together before.”

Your voice was soft, wavering a little like the day you told him you felt something between each other for the first time.  Your voice didn’t imply that you wanted to do anything sexual with him, it was said with a more innocent tone, because you really did just want to spend some time alone with him.  The easy going and zen aura he manifested definitely had an effect whenever you spent time with him.

You felt at peace when you were in the same room as him.  You felt at ease when he sat next to you on the couch.  And you felt giddy whenever he slotted his hand between yours and played with your fingers.

You had begun to feel something way more than the excitement of a sexual relationship.  But you didn't know how Shawn felt.  You two never talked about your feelings for each other.  Of course you enjoyed each other’s presence a little too much, cared for each other a little more than how best friend’s cared for each other, and you thought a little more about what his words meant than just a regular friend.

You had crossed the line with your feelings.

“C’mon,” Shawn guided you toward the double doors that led out of the arena and to the parking lot with the tour busses.

Your movements held no objection as you let him direct you, but your voice was different, “But you have to get ready–––”

“I wear the same pair of jeans and white shirt,” Shawn looked down at you with a smile as you felt the heat of the Portland air on your skin, “I’ll be fine.”

“You do not wear the same pair of jeans every night,” you objected, “I make sure they get washed after every performance,” you glared at him as his tour bus came into view, “so if you’re wearing the same pair then we need to have a serious talk.”

Shawn let out a boisterous laugh as he detached his arm from around your shoulder to open the door.  You offered him a smile as a thank you and walked up the stairs into the familiar temporary home.

Shawn followed close behind you and swiftly closed the door.  You could feel your heart hammering in your chest with the silence.  You were always nervous to be alone with him, but with recognizing your newfound feelings for him, all thoughts of composure left your mind and you were left in a puddle of your emotions.

“You know I––I didn’t––” Your back was to him, but you still shut your eyes tight in embarrassment, “––I didn’t mean I wanted anything more when I said I wanted alone time with you.”

“I know,” his voice was deep as you heard it from behind.

“I just––I like spending time with you,” your arms hung stiffly at your sides, hands curling into fists so tight at your confession, that you knew there would be a dozen crescent moon shapes along your palm, “We don’t need to do anything.”

You could feel Shawn’s breath hit the back of your neck as he spoke, “I know.”

“But like––If you want to––We can do stuff because I like that too, but I––I just wanted you to know that I…” your words trailed off as you felt Shawn’s hands ghost over your own, simultaneously easing your nerves and heightening them all at once, “…I like the times when we don't do any of that stuff.”

“I like those times too.”

It was the closest thing to a confession of feelings shared between the two of you.

In a moment of confidence, you spun around to face him, scared to see his facial expression.  While Shawn was gifted in the way he expressed words, you knew him well enough to know that his facial expressions held the full truth.  So, when you glanced up at him, and he was looking into your eyes with the same amount of desperation and longing you had in yours, you took your confidence up to another level.

You looped your index finger into the gap above one of the buttons on his shirt and pulled him in for an innocent kiss, curling your other hand around his neck.

When you pulled back, he seemed to be in a bit of a dazed and dreamlike state, with his lips pink and slightly parted as his brown eyes stared affectionately into yours.  The look in his eyes alerted you to the fact that maybe he wanted this too.  Maybe he wanted to tiptoe across the line with you.  

“I like being with you,” you said, voice barely above a whisper as you spoke the words that both of you knew held a deeper meaning.  Your fingers continued to play with the curls at the nape of his neck, “You calm me down.”

Another moment of silence passed and you felt the nerves bubble up in your stomach.  But you knew that Shawn felt the same way, you could tell by looking into his eyes as you saw the mechanics whirling through his mind, debating on whether or not to cross the line.  

You were across the line and held out a hand for him to join you.

Just when you were about to retreat from the bus out of embarrassment that maybe he only wanted to be physical with you, he gathered you up and kissed you again, one hand on your cheek as it slid down your neck.  You were positive he could hear the beat of your heart as he slowly walked you backwards down the little living area and to his private room in the back.

You broke the kiss, “But soundcheck––”

“They can find someone else to sing into the mic,” he interrupted you, turning the knob of the door to the small bedroom.  The door flew open and Shawn reattached your lips as he rushed the two of you inside.  And then, as if there were prying eyes of eager fans who wanted to know every detail about his life around, he shut the door right behind him so that it was just the two of you in the room.

Alone for the first time since crossing the line.

Shawn wasted no time in taking your hips in his hands as he pressed you up against the door, attacking you with kisses.  The odd plastic material of the door was uncomfortable against your back, but with Shawn’s chest pressed up against yours, you didn’t mind it.

As if it would be the last time you kissed, the two of you weren’t holding back.  The kisses he gave you, that you reciprocated, were open-mouthed, rough, and fiery.  

In moments like these, it was your greatest desire to run your hands along his chest, to be as physically close to him as possible, to rest your hands on his chest to feel if his heartbeat was beating as fast as yours.  But with both of his hands pinning your arms down to your sides, Shawn made that impossible, and you were forced to keep your arms limp as he nipped down your neck.

But after a few shrugs of your shoulder, he released your arms and you immediately wrapped your arms around his neck, fingers tugging on his hair. Shawn was particular when people touched his hair, and your fingers were full of hesitance when they first combed through his curls, but from the guttural sound he made when you pulled his hair from your collarbone back up to your lips, you knew he wasn’t complaining about you messing up his hair.

As much as you wanted to feel him, you savored the feeling of him touching your body.  His fingers ran up and down your sides, tracing lines on your back, inching your dress up.  

Suddenly, as if the reality of the situation came crashing down on him, he pulled away from you and ran his own hand through his hair.  You didn’t have to feel his heartbeat to know that it was beating just as fast as yours.

While you weren’t pleased by the sudden loss of contact, you couldn’t help but feel the slow tug of a smile at the corners of your mouth as you looked at him.  His white collared shirt was wrinkled and half-way untucked from his black skinny jeans.  And his curls were sticking up in a few different directions.

“You still wanna do this?”

His voice wavered in uncertainty, just like it did the day he first kissed you.

You stepped forward, hooking your index fingers through his belt loops, as you tilted your head up to sneak another kiss away from him as your answer.  Finally, he crossed the line and was with you on the other side.

Shawn held your head in his hands, tucking your hair behind your ears as he dragged his tongue across your lip to tease you.  You could’ve done without the short and sudden break of his kisses, but you would do anything for him if it eased his nerves.  

There was a change of pace to the way he touched you.  Your heart was still beating at a pace that would worry some medical professionals, but you felt calm and a sense of control you hadn’t felt before.  Your fingers stumbled over his belt buckle as you somehow managed to unhook it, only breaking your kisses once to pull the belt out of the loops. You held the leather material loosely in your hands, as you let it it slip away, dropping to the floor of the tour bus carelessly, the clanking of the buckle was loud enough for both of you to jump.

“My bad,” you nervously laughed off your embarrassment.  Shawn pulled away slightly to stare at you.  A smile softly made its way onto his face as he tilted his head to look at you with adoration.  You felt hot under his gaze, but you didn’t mind the attention you were receiving from him.

Just like every time you had been together, you wanted to watch him come undone and know that it was you who caused him to feel that way.

Shawn’s eyes traveled up, smile widening as crinkles appeared in the corner of his eyes as he softly laughed at the flower crown tangled in your hair.  It took both of his hands to remove it, and when he found a strand of hair tangled on the stem of one of the flowers, he gently unraveled it.

“I thought it added a nice touch to my outfit, a fan gave it to me,” you said with a pout as Shawn placed the flower crown on the small table in the room, “Don’t you like to play dress-up?”

“No,” Shawn answered with a whisper, “I’m tired of games.”

There was something about his voice, a delicateness to it that held a certain amount of desperation––of exhaustion––that you wanted to make disappear.  

His tone was soon replaced with a boyish smile before he reattached your lips to his.  Both of you took your time, but the urgency in your kisses and touches didn’t go unnoticed.  Your fingers went to unbuttoning his shirt as you guided him to walk backwards to his bed.  Once the top half of the shirt was unbuttoned, you slid your hands inside, spreading the shirt open to pop off the rest of the buttons.  Shawn pulled his arms out one by one, as the shirt slowly slid off his shoulders, making sure that he always had a hand on your body.  Once his shirt was fully unbuttoned and hanging from the top of his jeans, you tugged on the tucked portion out of his pants to threw it on the floor.

“That shirt wrinkles easily,” Shawn easily smiled at you, “My stylist will have your head.”

You let out a humorless laugh as you ran your hands over his chest, “I hear if you ask her nicely she’ll do anything you say.”

His skin was warm like the summer air.

“Will she now?” His smile morphed into a smirk as you felt him fiddle with the zipper on the back of your dress.  You nodded your head as you felt him pull the zipper down your back in a teasingly slow manner only to zip it right back up.

He did that a few times and the control over him you felt before was dwindling away with every tug of the dress zipper.  Instead of surrendering and giving him the upper hand, you placed a hand on his chest and pushed him onto the bed.  Surprised by your act of boldness, he tilted his head up at you.  But you could see that he enjoyed whatever dynamic was happening from the mischievous glint that twinkled up at you.

You moved to stand in between his legs, looking down at him and mirroring the lust in his eyes, as he wrapped his hands around your thighs at your knees and dragged his hands up.  He never broke eye contact with you as his hands moved further up your thighs, disappearing under the material of your dress.

You urged Shawn to scoot back on the bed.  With your hands on his shoulders to keep balanced, you straddled him, resting your knees on either side of him.  You paused for a moment to run a hand through his hair before bending your head to capture his lips in a kiss.  Shawn’s hands gripped your waist, and with one hand inching up your back toward the zipper, he finally managed to bring the zipper all the way down.

But before your moment of intimacy could continue on, you pulled back and raised your eyebrows at him.  Shawn didn’t seem too pleased at the loss of contact, but didn’t press you any further than what you were comfortable with.

“Are you sure?”

You were giving him an out; he knew that.  And while you wanted nothing more to continue on with what was to come, first and foremost he was your boss.  You were on his payroll and you didn’t want to make things any more complicated than they already were.  Sure, the two of you had sex before, but this was crossing a line into uncharted territory with real feelings.

Your question caused his smile to falter a little.  But with a hoarse voice, he managed to soften his eyes as they stared into yours, doing his best to convey every word, “Really fucking sure.”

The way he looked into your eyes––like you held every inspiration to every one of his future songs and how his voice sounded like he was pleading with you to let him imoralitize every detail of this feeling on pen and paper––you almost surrendered.  You almost let him have complete control to do whatever he pleased to your body, just so you could really feel the true impact of his words.  But you didn’t want to wave a white flag just yet, so you motioned him to slide further back on the bed, placing a hand flat on his chest and pushed him down.

You had never been so forward with him, so direct in what you wanted, that a gasp escaped from his throat when his head hit the pillow.  Leaning over him, you lowered yourself down, pinning his arms by his biceps, much like he had done to you earlier against the door, and caught him in a kiss.  This time, your tongue dominated, exploring every inch of his mouth and softly biting down on his lower lip, dragging it away with you until you released it.

Shawn didn’t fight you, and you kept your grip on his biceps as you trailed kisses up his jaw all the way to his ear, nibbling on the lobe.  Your kisses up and down his neck were full of desire, licking and sucking your way down.  

Shawn sighed as you reached his collarbone, and when you peered up at him, his eyes were closed.  His body radiated with warmth, as you moved your lips slowly down his chest, as you released the grip you had on his arms to caress his chest.

As soon as his biceps were free from the constraints of your hands, Shawn gained the upper hand, and flipped you over so you were on your back.  He sat with his knees between your legs, with the lack of control you felt sheepish under him, but he offered you a shy smile that rekindled the light in your lower abdomen.

Shawn started at your knees, one hand on each, and ran his hands over your legs.  His eyes were bright and alluring, stare never faltering, as your body was on high alert, attentive as his fingers skimmed underneath your dress.

Even with the dress still on, you felt exposed, as he gripped your thighs with each hand and pulled you toward him.  Then he leaned down toward you, moving slowly between your legs and up your torso to give you another kiss.

“Y/n,” Shawn hummed as if not believing he was awake for this moment.  He slowly dragged down a strap of your dress and kissed the spot of your shoulder where it had previously laid, “We’re gonna do this?”

“I…I want to,” you admitted shyly, pulling your arm out of the strap.  Shawn helped you remove your other arm from the strap as you asked, “Do you want to?”

Shawn smiled, “I really want to.”  He sat up, pulling your dress up over your head so fast that you weren’t even sure how it happened until you felt a coldness over your exposed body.

Your dress was tossed carelessly on the floor, as Shawn leaned down to press his chest against yours.

“Cold?” Shawn mumbled as he kissed his way down your neck.

“Um…no,” you sighed in response to his gentle biting at your skin.  “You––You’re really warm.”

Shawn leaned over and pulled back the covers on the bed, and nodded for you to climb under the sheets, which you did without hesitation.  As your head hit the pillow, Shawn crawled in soon after, unclasping your bra as he glided the straps down your shoulders.

Your fingers fumbled with the button on his pants, which was a little hard considering how tight you were pressed up against each other under the covers.  But once you popped the button from his jeans off, Shawn wiggled his legs from out of his pants, flinging them aside.  There was a noticeable bulge in his boxer-briefs, and you sucked in a deep breath.  Your moment of shyness caused him to let out a small chuckle as he brought a hand to rest on your stomach.

“I kinda like it when you’re nervous,” Shawn whispered and nudged your feet apart, brushing his fingers along the waistband of your underwear.  He dipped his index finger below the waistband, gasping when he touched your skin.

“I’m––We’ve had sex before,” you tried to keep your voice even, but with his fingers dropping dangerously low, your voice wavered, “I’m not…nervous.”

Shawn shut his eyes and leaned down to press a peck on your lips. “Okay,” his words were muffled against your lips, as his fingertips lightly brushed over your crotch that was still covered by your underwear.  You shivered again, but this time it wasn’t from the cold air.  He placed the hand on your waist to hold you in place as he leaned down to catch your lips in a heated kiss.  His tongue slid into your mouth with no reservations as his hand rubbed soft circles on the inside of your thigh.

His hand left your thighs and traveled upward, pressing a hand flat on you, watching you for your reaction to his touch.

You were crumbling like a cookie when he brought his hand to his mouth, sliding his index and middle finger between his lips.  You felt the anticipation building in your lower stomach.  He brought his fingers out of his mouth, raising his eyebrow and smirking at you, glowing with smugness.  Before you could criticize him for it, his hand slid under your underwear, with his wet fingers gliding over you in between your slit.

As if it was like you were on autopilot, your eyes closed, head falling back on the pillow as you started to feel the build up of the state of euphoria you knew Shawn was going to lead you to.  His fingers were agonizingly slow at first as they became acquainted with the sensitive area.  His movements were torturous as you bit your bottom lip to keep any obscene words from coming out.  Every time the pads of his fingers rubbed your clit, your breath got caught in your throat.

When your eyes opened, just for a millisecond, you should see that his eyes were only focused on you.  His eyes seemed just as intrigued by your reaction as you were with his fingers.  You brought a hand up onto his shoulder, slowly moving it to the back of his neck to hold you for support, bringing him down for a kiss that you instantly deepened.  Shawn made that sound again, a content grunt in the back of his throat, as you felt the feeling of the bulge grow against your thigh.

Still breathing heavily, Shawn broke the kiss, but still had his fingers working down below.

“I want you,” he breathed, lips against your ear.  And from the way his fingers skimmed over you with ease, slippery and coated, he knew just how much you wanted him. 

Before you could verbalize your desire for him, his arm tightened around you as he pushed your thighs further apart with his knee.  His middle finger began to move in circles over your clit, gentle at first, then increasing in pressure.  You threw your head back onto the pillow, clenching your jaw tight to hold off the sounds you knew he wanted you to make.  But when the speed of his fingers increased, you opened your eyes and were automatically met with his determined eyes staring into yours, you couldn’t fight the moan that escaped your lips.  You brought an arm up to curl around his neck to lift yourself up slightly from the bed as you buried your head into the crook of his neck to muffle the sound of your moans.

When Shawn removed his finger from beneath your underwear for a split second you groaned into his neck, missing the contact of his skin on yours when you were so close to a release.  He took his wrist and rolled it to stretch it out and then his hand dipped right back in as you pressed a kiss to his neck.

His movements were a little sloppier with his tired hand, but the feeling in your lower stomach began to build faster and faster with every flick of his wrist.  A tingly feeling started out on the tip of your toes and spread further and further up your body, making all of the hair on your body stick up.  

When you finally felt it––the tensing of your muscles and a euphoric release all at once––you threw your head back on the pillow, bringing Shawn down with you, as your hips bucked against his hand.  But his movements didn’t stop there, he kept his finger circling your clit, encouraging you to ride out your high.

You were not a stranger to Shawn making you feel like you were on top of the world, but something about confirming your mutual want for each other beyond a little fun here and there, made your orgasm earth shattering.  You felt it rip through your body that left you in a puddle on the bed.  Shawn slowed down his movements, hooking his fingers around the band of your underwear, helping you shimmy out of them.  In one swift movement, he discarded your underwear somewhere around the room and removed his own.

Once he kicked his legs to get his underwear off from around his ankles he trapped you in a kiss, grinding his body against yours, not shy about his growing hardness brushing against the inside of your thigh.

With a lazy smile, he pulled away from the kiss as he lifted his body from yours, reaching over to the small night stand next to the bed.  He fumbled his hand inside the drawer, “Where is it––Fucking thing––Got it,” he slammed the drawer closed with a bang as he retrieved the condom, ripped the package open, and left the wrapper on the night stand.  

As you watched him slip the condom on, all you could think of was how many times you found yourself in this position; lying beneath Shawn, forehead glistening with a bit of sweat, as you felt a shiver shake your body at what was about to happen.

Shawn leaned down, leaving a trail of kisses up your stomach before meeting your lips.  His warmth spread over you, bringing a slight relaxing effect to your nerves.  Your breaths were shallow, chest rising and falling rapidly.  Shawn noticed your nerves and paused, the tip of his shaft against your opening.

“Everything’s alright,” he lightly brushed his lips against yours in reassurance.

Shawn waited until he got a nod in confirmation from you before he continued, and in one swift motion, he slid in with ease.  You scrunched up your nose and screwed your eyes shut as you felt him push himself further into you.  It was a pleasurable sensation, but you couldn’t deny the little bit of pain you felt as he stretched your walls.

When Shawn saw the expression on your face, he slowed down his movements, letting out a grunt as he came to a complete stop, “Okay?”

There was a tenderness behind his words from the way he checked in on you to make sure you were comfortable.  He had always been gentle and kind with you in the past, but this felt more special.  And the more you looked up at his face, with his eyebrows scrunched together in concern, it planted a seed of confidence in your stomach to try something neither of you had done in the bedroom together; you lightly pushed at his chest for him to get off you.

Before he could get a word  past his lips, you sat up and swung one of your legs over his waist.  You took his cheeks into your hands, and when Shawn realized what you were doing, a smirk grew on his face.  He propped himself up on his elbows, moving back on the bed a bit, as you placed your hands on his shoulders.

Without another word, you lowered yourself onto him, Shawn trying his best to keep his eyes open and connected with yours.

But when you sunk fully down onto him, he screwed his eyes tight, throwing his head back against the flimsy tour bus headboard, “Shit.”

You kept one hand on his shoulder as the other trailed up to hold his cheek in your hand, thumb grazing his jawline as you felt it tighten. You moaned softly, neither one of you saying a word, as your fingernails dug into his shoulder.

With the new position you found yourself in, you had more of a sense of control than any of the other times you were intimate with him.  It was something you liked.  You were moving, up and down, at a rhythmic pace, as Shawn ran his fingers up and down your thighs.  He placed a hand on your waist, keeping you in position as he moved further back on the bed.  

Your movements were faster and Shawn pressed a quick kiss to your lips as he lowered his head and placed his lips over your breast.  If it wasn’t for Shawn’s hand on your hip, encouraging you to keep up with your movements, you would have stopped right then and there.  Your mouth hung open as you felt his tongue swirl around your nipple, at a loss for words, you ran your fingers through his curls and pulled on them a little.  Shawn moaned against your breast in pleasure, sending vibrations throughout your body.  

Shawn lifted his head and placed a sweet kiss below your ear, “Relax.”  His voice was soft, but seeing as you two were still connected at the hips, his voice was thick.

You hadn’t realized that your breathing was sharp and uneven.  You stilled your hips and pressed a hand against your chest, as you tried to calm down your breathing. You were more embarrassed about your erratic breathing than you were about being naked on top of him.  He had seen you naked before, but never had he seen you nervous quite like this.

“I…” You were racking your brain for an excuse, but with a quirk of his eyebrow and a soft smile, you knew any lie you told would be detected by him, “I’m nervous.”

Shawn smiled and placed a gentle kiss on your cheek before wrapping his arms around your waist to bring you in for a hug.  His calloused fingers ran up and down your spine as you buried your head in the crook of his neck, taking in a deep, shaky breath.

“It’s alright,” Shawn whispered into your ear, fingers still delicately dancing on your back, “Trust me.”

He pressed a few kisses on your shoulder before you nodded your head against him.  You trusted him a lot.  More than you probably should.  With your confirmation, Shawn pressed a quick kiss to the top of your head and wrapped a strong arm around your waist as he swiftly flipped you over onto your back.

Without a slight notion of hesitation, Shawn thrusted back into you, so deep that you clenched your teeth and pressed your head deep onto the pillow.  You gasped as he pulled out, and when he thrusted back into you again, sharp and quick, you parted your lips, "Shawn.”  

Shawn’s pace was faster than yours, but his thrusts were still careful and executed perfectly as he hit the right spot every time.  You let out a sigh of content at the sensation of being joined together with another person––a person you cared deeply about.

He kept himself hovered over you with a hand fisting the white sheets right by your head, and hooked his other arm under your thigh, wrapping it around his waist.  He held your thigh in place as he continued his fast thrusts. The only sound you heard in the tiny back room of the tour bus were the mixed gasps of air shared between the two of you and the slap of skin as Shawn repeatedly pushed into you.

Your head started to spin as you felt your stomach tighten, reaching your peak.  Shawn had taken the words right from you since he stood behind you when you first walked onto the tour bus.  So, as you struggled to keep the lewd sounds of your orgasm to a minimum, you tried to keep your eyes locked with the brown irises above you.  His eyebrows were scrunched together as he bit on his bottom lip, concentrating on every thrust of his hips as they collided with yours.

His eyes were soft, trailing down your body and then back up to stare into your eyes.  You brought a hand up to his forehead and pushed back the curls that were slightly sticking to hid skin from the thin layer of sweat.  He sucked in a breath of air as you felt the pads of fingers tighten around your thigh.

“Y/n.”

You could feel when he hit his high; voice sounding desperate, as his pace became quicker and sloppier as he lowered himself until your chests were pressed together.  He nuzzled his head into your neck, pressing hot open kisses up and down your throat.

You grabbed a fisful of his curls as he continued to slowly rock back and forth until he completely stalled his movement inside of you.  He released a deep breath, hot and full of pure content at the conclusion of your little activity, and raised his head to look into your eyes.  Shawn reached a hand up and ran his fingers over your hairline before softly tracing his fingers down the side of your face, cupping your cheek.

With your chests still stuck together by sweat, he only had to lower his head a few centimeters to brush his lips against yours.  The kisses were intimate, soft like a kid chasing a butterfly on a warm spring afternoon, before he changed the pace and captured your lips in a deep kiss.  The hold he had on your thigh dropped as he trailed his hand from the tops of your thigh, giving your hips a light pinch that had you squirming under him, and then slid his hand up to rest on your ribcage, just below your breast.

Your thoughts were wildly running around, basking in the feeling of being fully consumed by him.  

You were consumed by the feeling of the blazing trail his touches left on you.  Consumed by his voice, saying your name with all the care and wonder in the world, but also in a tone that you would never want your parents to hear.  Consumed by the taste of his salty skin as you pressed kisses along his neck and the smell of freshly washed clothes mixed with sweet post-sex. But most of all, you were consumed by the sight of the boy on top of you; eyes always searching yours to make sure you were comfortable.

It felt like you didn’t know how to breathe until this moment.

When he pulled out of you, there was a shy smile toying on his face.  He looked nothing like the previous times when the two of you had just finished having sex.  In those moments in the past, he would have a satisfied and confident smirk on his face, knowing he made you feel better than anyone else.  But even with his confidence, he still had those soft eyes though.

Soft eyes and a shy smile.

Shawn removed the condom and tossed it in the trash can that was next to his bed, crawling back under the covers.  He laid on his side, head resting on the pillow to face you, as he wiggled under the covers, getting in a comfortable position.

“Hi,” he said with a smile on his face.

You found his hand under the covers and slotted your fingers through his as you returned his soft smile, “Hey.”

Shawn gave your hand a slight squeeze and the two of you fell into silence staring at each other.  Normally, being under someone’s gaze, especially Shawn’s, would cause you to shudder back.  But not this time.  You felt the complete opposite; the more he stared at you, the more you felt desired––more confident.

He untangled your hands, and at first you were sad about the loss of contact, but he threw an arm over your waist and pulled you in close to his chest, pressing a kiss on the top of your head.  You fitted your arm around him and smiled into his bare chest, because yes, while holding hands is a nice gesture, it didn’t hold a flame to the feeling of leaning against his chest; your head rising and falling with his rhythmic breathing as your heartbeat tried to sync up with his.  While you felt the erratic beating of his heart, you were having trouble getting your heartbeat to slow down for him.

Maybe your heart would always beat a little faster for him.

[mottephobia-imagines]

Ikemen Sengoku Mafia!AU (Oda Forces)

In case y’all didn’t know I also write for Otome (both Voltage and Cybird)

—

Oda Nobunaga: the leader

Absolutely a leader of a yakuza- and a good one at that too

(Assuming this takes place in modern day japan) runs one of the biggest Yakuza factions

On the outside though, he’s a very successful heir to a large, multimillion company (think Eisuke Ichinomiya from KBTBB I mean they’re practically the same person cmon)

Due to his seemingly inconspicuous ‘day job’ and charming personality making him very popular to the public eye, no one suspects him of being involved in any organized crime, so he’s able to operate very smoothly under the radar

Of course, he has spies every where- including in the government and police force so his tracks are very covered

Aims to take political power at some point and have his faction be the dominant faction (eliminating all possible rivals)

His biggest one being his enemy Kenshin Uesugi’s faction, who takes any and every opportunity they can to get under his nerves constantly lmao

Nobunaga and Kenshin have never seen each other face to face (if they did it’d be a blood bath), but still have an unspoken respect for each other as much as they hate each other lmao

The rivalry between their two families has lasted generations- now that it’s their turn, Nobunaga is determined to end it with the last laugh

Nobunaga’s still the same arrogant, cocky bastard he is, but 100x worse (as with modern technology)

Grew up with a very traditional family who were samurais in the past, so he’s had a lot of training in swordsmanship and martial arts

Always keeps a pistol in his jacket pocket and wears a bulletproof vest 90% of the time

(He’s not that good with guns tho)

On his desk there’s probably a little plateful of candies, and his fridge is also stocked with sweet things (it’s a wonder how he doesn’t have diabetes yet)

Also has a pocketful of tiny candies to last him throughout the day (much to Hideyoshi’s dismay)

Also, slicked back hair, suited up Nobunaga with a sleeve tattoo (he’d have to try really hard to keep his sleeve tattoo hidden but still just imagine)

Hideyoshi Toyotomi: the bodyguard

Hideyoshi is Nobunaga’s most trusted confidant, who also serves as his bodyguard

Wherever Nobunaga goes, Hideyoshi follows suit

More often than not the voice of reason

Always trusts his gut and is always skeptical of new members (or just people in general why won’t you trust me dammit)

He came from a poor family of farmers in the countryside, and when they couldn’t take care of him anymore they abandoned him

He was a thief for a little while, until Nobunaga’s dad took him in and raised him as his own

Hideyoshi deems this a debt he has to pay, and him helping Nobunaga and keeping him straight will repay the family’s kindness

He’s always the one to direct less major missions and cleans up the messes

Frequently in contact with Mistuhide, and he hates the guy (more like annoyed tbh)

He’s basically Nobunaga’s messenger lmao

And mother older brother figure, he frequently stops Nobunaga from rampaging over something insignificant and keeps him from being unhealthy by taking away his candies sometimes

Is better skilled with a gun, and thus carries not one, but two (those like shoulder straps for guns under his suit type of thing)

He goes undercover from time to time, although it’s not his specialty- he’s kind of a jack of all trades kinda guy

He’s really good at sussing out the spies and traitors, because he listens to his gut and it’s almost always right

Will do anything and everything to help Nobunaga succeed, even if it means killing anyone who stands in the way

Date Masamune: the affiliate

Masamune is actually the leader of another yakuza faction, but since it was so weak at the time he took the opportunity to pair up with Nobunaga

His faction deals more with drugs and weapons, smuggling them over borders and getting them out and in of the country

That being said, most of his deals take place at exclusive bars and clubs- where the richest of the rich gather

He’s a pretty laid-back guy for someone who runs a drug syndicate- he doesn’t really care how things get done as long as they get done somehow

Also pretty goofy- when people first meet him, they’d think that there was no way he was in the yakuza

Even though the sleeve tattoos and the eyepatch probably should’ve been enough for them to know

And the massive amount of jewelry, too- Masamune isn’t shy about his wealth like at all

He’s totally the type to wear those bigass rings, complete with sapphires on them just to show off a little more

He loves to piss off Nobunaga, he loves for it

Ieyasu tells him that it might get him killed (low key a worried bb) but Masamune knows Nobunaga isn’t gonna get rid of him anytime soon; due to the fact that Masamune’s faction gives a shit ton of money

Him and Ieyasu tolerate get along pretty well, although the latter may deny it

Out of all of them, he’s probably the strongest and most skilled combat-wise; he’s adept in martial arts, knives and blades, as well as having an extensive knowledge on firearms and even bombs and how to use them

Honestly, he’s with Nobunaga just for the power boost- ones his faction gets enough power, he’s gonna dip then come back and be like ‘sike u thought’

Masamune has the same aspiration as both Nobunaga and Kenshin, but knows he can’t fight them both at the same time. So why not let the two battle it out then fight the winner?

Akechi Mistuhide: the spy

Aka the rat

Mistuhide is a double agent working for Nobunaga, on his own terms

He’s a spy within the government’s police force, and nobody has caught him yet

Tells Nobunaga about any upcoming busts and when and where they’re gonna go, who they’re going to investigate and go after, basically all information on cases that may affect him

Very good at hiding his tracks- it’s almost impossible to get this guy

Also very good at swaying his coworkers and even bosses- tells them whether or not to pursue a case or person, acknowledge evidence, and even do something for him

He started out as an assassin for hire before becoming an informant for Nobunaga, which is the foundation for the distrust Hideyoshi has on him

Coupled with the fact that he’s easily a manipulative and cunning bastard, you’ve got someone who is a valuable asset but you can’t help but wonder when he’ll turn his back on you

He’s actually the son of a very rich man who had many wives and concubines; growing up, his father’s other wives would try to kill him using any tactic they could, so he developed quickly some skills that children shouldn’t have learned

He knows when food and drinks are poisoned, when someone is trying to ambush you, and when someone is lying- and this was before any formal training for an assassin

Because of his talent with blades and smaller guns, he’s the one Nobunaga sends out most of the time to kill someone and make it seem like an accident

Teams up with Masamune to annoy Nobunaga, Hideyoshi, and Ieyasu (sometimes)

He once went undercover with Hideyoshi- the teasing was unfiltered and hard. Hideyoshi kept yelling at him to please stop, we have a fuckinh mission to do and you making me flustered will not make this any less difficult.

He honestly just lives to see people annoyed/embarrassed lmao

Used to tease Ieyasu a lot before Masamune came and essentially replaced him

Mitsuhide’s reasons for joining Nobunaga’s faction still remains a mystery, and he’d like to keep it that way

Tokugawa Ieyasu: the doctor

Why is there no yellow

The underground doctor who works for Nobunaga, Ieyasu has plenty of knowledge and experience despite his young age

At first, you’d think he isn’t a doctor at all- he‘s rough, not exactly friendly, and easily irritated; which is exactly what makes him so good at his job

As an underground doctor, Ieyasu’s primary job is to salvage whatever unfortunate soul had been injured at the time- sometimes, it’d be much, much more than one person

He can’t afford to let his emotions get to him and slow him down, so he’s learned to repress his emotions and completely focus on his job instead

Also, he can’t be like a traditional doctor because he’s dealing with criminals here- and with his pretty face, not everyone’s gonna take him seriously if he offers the usual caring doctor attitude

Ieyasu grew up in a wealthy family before being kidnapped and sold in the black market as a child, abused within the system and eventually ended up in an old doctor’s hands

The old doctor would basically take him on as an apprentice and told him all his medical knowledge, urging him to follow in his footsteps before he died

When the doctor did die, Ieyasu continued his medical studies and attended several schools and universities before going off the grid completely

Years later he was found in a back alley market (think the black market from beastars) by non other than Nobunaga, who he saved from some thugs (or at least tried to)

Because of his work as a doctor, he often forgets to really take a rest and goes days without sleeping and living off spicy ramen noodles

It’s gotten so bad at one point that Masamune (who buys the noodles for him regularly) actually confiscated all of them and demanded Ieyasu be given a day off (he can’t have tease him if he’s dead!)

Speaking of Masamune, they met after the ‘eyepatch wearing idiot’ came into his clinic after a particularly grueling gun fight with the police

He’s kind of thankful for Masamune- Ieyasu would still have to deal with Mitsuhide and that guy gets on his nerves the quickest, if Masamune didn’t take his spot lmao

He has a little pet porcupine at home, and he sometimes sticks him in the chest pocket of his doctor’s coat whenever he knows he’s gonna spend days at his clinic

Don’t let his pretty looks fool you; mans learned many combat skills from Masamune including how to absolutely murder people with guns

Ishida Mitsunari: the hacker

From how sweet and kind he looks he definitely does not look like part of the Yakuza

Like, he looks like he belongs in a classroom teaching kids, not in a computer room hacking government files

Extremely skilled hacker- he can get any information from anywhere and leave no trace

Is the main source of information for Nobunaga

Mitsunari was the son of a college professor, and spent most of his time reading in the school library when his father took him to his lectures

Pretty soon he found himself loving computers and tinkering with them, eventually leading to him hacking some minor websites

Fat forward a couple of years and his curious nature doesn’t stop, leading to him discovering some secret files/tapes of Nobunaga’s faction

He left a clear enough trace that he was easily tracked down and almost killed; however, Nobunaga saw some potential in him and decided to give him a choice between dying or joining them (not much of a choice there buddy)

He joined in his late teens, so he’s never really experienced what life was like (thanks Nobunaga)

Nonetheless, he’s actually pretty terrifying when he’s angry

With his demeanor, you’d think he wouldn’t have a mean bone in his body- wrong

Being in the yakuza at a young age, he’s seen some shit and learned some shit- and he’s even tried some of them

Many people have spited him, thinking he’s a doormat

Mitsunari does not let that fly

People underestimate how much he can ruin their lives through the computer screen- financial ruin, a hard hit to reputations, etc

He rarely if ever does that though, most of the time he’d just brush it off and continue what he’s doing (unless it escalates then you’re fucked lmao Mitsudarki come thru)

Mitsunari’s really good with kids, so often times the higher ups or other members leave their kids or pets with him because even if he is booked for work, he still takes stellar care of them

Gets teased by Mitsuhide often, but doesn’t get what he’s saying most of the time

Is heavily opposed to killing- he’d much rather talk it through with someone or ruin their life rather than taking it

—

Uggghhhhh this took so long but I love these little shits so it was worth it 😤😤 they’re so pretty wth-

[jungshookz]

so, about the discord server...

hi everyone! 

after much contemplation and consideration, i have made the (truly unfortunate!) decision to terminate my discord server. 

i know that it’s only been up for less than a week so it really isn’t that big of a deal, but it still wasn’t an easy decision for me to make knowing that a bunch of you have really been enjoying your time there and have made so many new pals! i myself have enjoyed talking to all of you and getting to know each and every single one of you!

i want to be as honest with you guys as i possibly can: for the past couple of days, i’ve been receiving more and more anonymous messages voicing concerns regarding the behaviours of some of our members, and it’s become clear to me that a lot of people have been feeling excluded and unwilling to join in on the conversation because of that :-( some of you have expressed to me that seems as though the server has turned into a personal group chat for a small portion of members, making it hard to feel like you’re part of our little community! the original intent of this server was to bring all of you guys together anD to provide a place for me to engage with everyone altogether instead of just one on one like it is on tumblr, but it seems as though it’s done the complete opposite and it’s ended up separating everyone instead… it just doesn’t sit right in my tummy knowing that a few of you feel like you don’t belong. also, i want to emphasize that this is absolutely no one’s fault!!! the last thing i want is for people to start blaming themselves for my decision!! :-(

i’m also aware that many of you are more comfortable talking to me here on tumblr because you can choose to send messages in anonymously whereas you can’t really do that on discord! i felt so guilty that some of you were feeling left out on the action due to not wanting to use discord at all, so that’s another reason why i’m doing this.

i’m planning to keep the server up for a few more hours just so everyone has the chance to send each other friend requests (and to say goodbye to our little bot buddies meeper and beeper) - so if you haven’t shared socials yet, i’d suggest heading over to the server and doing that now! i know that a couple of you talked about splitting off and creating your own little servers, so now you can go and do that!! :D

i completely understand that it isn’t fair to a lot of you that i’ve chosen to take the server down, so i fully allow you to be upset, disappointed, and angry with me if that’s how you feel! if this is the beginning of the #ceeisoverparty.,.,., i will lie down, close my eyes, and accept my DESTINY!!!

i hope you can understand where i’m coming from, and i’m so sorry if i let you down in any way. i let myself down!! i definitely bit off way more than i could chew anD that’s not good because my mouth is hecka tiny!!! to be honest, i was only expecting there to be a maximum of twenty-ish people to join the server, but there are now well over a hundred of you in there and that’s so insane to me!! until i can figure out a way to clone myself, monitoring the server anD answering questions on tumblr anD writing fics and drabbles all at the same time is a little too much for my tiny pea brain to handle!!

once again, i’m so sorry that i couldn’t make this work. i know it seems like i’m just giving up but i promise you that i’ve given it a lot of thought! (if u follow me on twitter u will have seen my ‘should i delete the server??’ tweet followed by a ‘siKE i am not deleting discord evER’ tweet like a day after lmao) i’ll definitely miss talking to you guys on discord, but i just think this’ll be better for everyone in the long run. 

so, to make a long ass story short, i guess what i’m trying to say is that i’ll be sticking to tumblr for now!! i always LOVE answering your guys’ messages here, so i hope that you’ll stop by and visit me from time to time to chat even if you’re off in your own teeny servers :’)

cee

p.s. to soften the blow i have a couple of drabbles all warmed up and ready to be posted soon + i’m currently working on the very first jungshookz trivia quiz for everyone :-)

[vampish-glamour]

Loki anon.

I knooooow, I was looking forward to evil Loki myself! I was so ready for it! He is still kinda abrasive, but definitely not the villain I wanted. I miss the real MCU characters, I'm tired of fanfiction coming to the screen.

I used to be active in fanfiction communities, but now I'm just sort of done with the whole thing (gender fandom mixing with real fandoms was unpleasant). I'm hoping to take everything I learned from fanfiction, flush half of it down the toilet, and become a better writer than the Loki staff lmao. After seeing how this show dashed so many of my own expectations, I want to eventually write a story about Loki and other gods in the modern world. My bisexual gender fluid Loki is going to be cool and evil 😎 hopefully one day my books will make it to y'alls hands, if all goes well!

If not, I will always be bitching about the Loki show lol, and insisting that I could do it better.

I thought the whole show would be evil Loki!!! >:( you can’t just make a show about a villain and be like “haha sike”

I feel you about the gender shit in fandom. It sucks to have Tumblr MOGAI shit blend with fandom, but here we are. And Disney took notes 💀

That sounds like a great book, and an awesome Loki!! Use your anger about Disney’s Loki to fuel your story lol. Except wasn’t there some sort of copyright they did on his name?? Despite him being a mythology character? That could be an issue lol

[cowboyshit]

1, 5, 10 - with Christmas Catharsis and Hangman, 20, 25 for the fanfiction writer asks, please?

Thank you SO much babe!!!! ♥♥♥ LBR I love talking about my fanfiction akjsdkjsdkj 

( FANFICTION WRITER ASKS )

1: how old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction?ohh, I was fourteen!! I only know/remember this because it was pirates of the caribbean fanfiction and it was literally the NIGHT after I got back from seeing it in the theaters lmao 

5: if you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi chaptered stories, which would it be and why?COWBOY AND THE MUSTANG!!!! HANDS. DOWN. Oh, there’s so many reasons tbh and I could go into an essay about why, but I’ll condense it down for this answer. The main reason is that I really, really enjoy writing horses in any capacity, but the second reason is that it’s become the story I always wanted to write. I always DREAMED about writing a romance story where horses played a large part and what I’ve come up with next for cowboy and the mustang is SO exciting and I am DYING to write it. so far, all four parts add up to 25k words according to ao3. last year I told myself I would finally stop stalling or doubting myself and write a romance novella that’s at least 50k words… and with what I have planned next, I think cowboy and the mustang just might be that novella. plus, writing about cowboy adam, writing adam bonding with horses, and writing adam as a single father to a little girl ajdfksdlksakmjdslksd I just really, genuinely love this story so, so much. It’s very near and dear to my heart and when other people tell me THEY enjoy it to it just…I can’t even begin to explain how much it means to me.

10: in Christmas Catharsis, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternative ending in mind?honestly I had no alternative ending in mind! christmas catharsis, as the hangman gang knows, was a random inspiration I got two days before my smutmas fic was due to be posted. the story was one of those that just POURED out of me. it demanded to be written. I knew I wanted to keep it in the same day and write it (basically) moment-for-moment, because of how important their connection was. it’s supposed to be a magical, heavy, all-pressing weight pushing on them and forcing them closer and closer together despite all the reasons they may want to keep apart (particularly noelle). I knew I wanted to end with a little joke, just to help break how emotion-heavy the ride was, and I actually came up with adam’s stupid “oh I have plans srry haha sike my plans are with you!” joke about halfway through writing the ficlet itself.

20: are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently?hmmm… none that spring up immediately to mind, but I know there are certain ones I wish I would have added a little more to.  maybe ‘the cowboy hat stays on’ I would have liked to have added more to?? sometimes I think if I could revisit that fic there’s a LOT I would rewrite.

25: have you ever cried whilst writing a story?okay… I know this is supposed to be about fanfiction, but… I have not yet cried when writing fanfiction (although my recent comfort fic got me a little bit when adam broke down) BUT just recently while writing with my best friend we wrote something that makes me full on SOB and I wish I could talk to people about. I had to take breaks when writing because I was crying so much and I haven’t even had the heart to go back and read it. It’s a poly trio, where the girl (my character) is in love with two brothers who are the president and vp of a 1% motorcycle gang. the three of them have been the best of friends for years, a perfect little family unit. my girl had previously confessed how she felt to both men and they decided that until she made up her mind which one she wanted to marry and be with, neither of them could have her. they don’t know about being poly at the moment. so anyways, in this chapter we just wrote, my girl and one of the guys broke down and caved to their attraction and started kissing. when they broke apart the guy thought that meant my girl chose him, but she said no. she still loved them BOTH equally and she could NOT have one without the other. well, on the club side of things, their peaceful town has been getting wild and there’s been a lot of death and danger close to home. the guy decides (he’s the president) that’s it. this isn’t safe. they’re all suffering and he’s afraid a target will come on her if anyone figures it out so he tells her… that’s it. he’s sending her away. for good. she’ll go and live her life and be happy and free of the club drama. and her heart fucking BREAKS. she full on breaks down sobbing and FUCK i ship these character soooo hard that it just… it hurts SO BAD. anyways, the vp brother comes home and finds his brother (the president) silently crying, runs into her room and finds her SOBBING and he just holds her and his brother comes in and tells him he’s sending her away. she wants them both and it’s not safe anymore. the vp brother breaks down SOBBING holding onto her begging his brother not to take her (he used to be addicted to drugs but he got clean thanks to the girl and he’s terrified he’ll have to go back to using once she’s gone). eventually they come to the conclusion that it is the best thing for her and she leaves them and fuck it HURTS. obviously they won’t be able to take it and a lot more drama is going to happen but EVENTUALLY they will be a secret poly trio and they will be HAPPY DAMMIT anyways if you’ll indulge me I’m gonna post a small part of it:

Leaving was going to keep her safe, but who was going to keep them safe?  Reagan squeezed tighter around Teddy and sobbed harder into his chest, knowing there were no answers she’d like.  She knew if something happened to them, even knowing there would be nothing she could have done if she was here, Reagan would feel guilty for every breath she took that they couldn’t.

Because it wasn’t just her whose heart was breaking.  It was all of them.  All three of their hearts were shattered, forced apart.  The only difference was Reagan could be sent away without anyone following her, without the entire club falling to pieces because of it.  Teddy and Eli were still going to have to be here, where reality had turned scary, and they’d be in danger’s way every single day.

It both hurt worse, knowing they’d be hurting, and comforted her, because at least she wasn’t crazy to feel as heartbroken as she did.

“I wish I could take you both with me,” she said, pathetically, muffled into Teddy’s chest as the three of them just held each other in the silence that chased their cries.  She found that a piece of her hated that the first (and likely only) time she had them both, wrapped into their joined embrace, was for this reason.  She hated everything that’d happened, but most of all she hated that she was powerless to change it.

That this had to be their answer.

Teddy kissed her, and Reagan pushed back into the kiss as hard and needy as she felt, so he’d always remember not only what she’d said, but how much she’d meant it.  She was never, ever going to stop loving him.  She could leave no room for doubt.

Then Eli kissed her.  Feverish.  Desperate. As if he wanted to put his lips everywhere and know what every piece of her tasted like before he lost her forever. Reagan tumbled into Eli’s passion, wrapped up in him and dizzy by the time Teddy called him back.  Her hands fell out of his and instantly felt achy with cold.  She clasped them together, and her lips pressed and quivered, and the view of them blurred and danced, and their home behind her, and the life she’d always thought of as the perfect one.

“I…”  she didn’t know what she could say that’d already been said.  There wasn’t anything.  She just didn’t want to admit the time had come.  She needed to leave.  That was all that was left.  Her tongue swept her dry lips and tasted their tears and their kisses.  She sniffed and forced herself to turn away, reaching to wipe at her cheeks and walking too quickly to the driver’s side of the car.

For Teddy, Reagan made herself get into that car.  She always believed Teddy was right and there was no better proof of her reverence to his word than her acceptance of his decree, even if it was the hardest thing she’d ever had to do.  Reagan threw no more fits.  Reagan didn’t try and argue around the solution.  She reached up, adjusting the review mirror, swallowed back the tears at them in the sight of it, and pushed her boot down on the gas pedal, driving away and trying not to think about how much smaller they were getting as she did.

[conquerandtravelwithme-blog]

Ever imagined traveling alone or just traveling in general ?

Traveling can be quite scary in a lot of Different ways especially being a woman who is traveling by herself . Most people never have the guts to do it, just the thoughts . Are you the person to ask all of your friends the infamous “ Let’s book a trip ?” Question Repeatedly ? If so , today is the day to grow some balls !

I’ve learned over the past two years of asking and waiting for people to do things with me that I’ll never see or try new things . My first time flying in life was to Miami with an old co worker and my first time flying alone was to Los Angeles ,Ca to visit family . Booking that flight to LA was the hardest thing for me . I kept thinking of the worst things possible like “What if the plane crashes ?” Or “What if someone snatches me ?” , better yet “What if I get lost ?” . Having those kind of thoughts would easily sike you out of booking that trip you always wanted . What I am trying to say is “JUST BOOK THE DAMN TRIP !” . That was the best thing I’ve ever done for myself and literally everything worked out perfectly . I got to party with a bunch of celebrities(VIP) and eat at all these upscale restaurants while being at peace . I only stayed in La for 4 days 3 nights but I got to see Calabasas , Santa Monica , Hollywood sign , and walk of fame . I forgot to mention I barely paid for anything while I was out there lol . Can someone say “Best vacation ever ?” ... well duh you haven’t been to that many places “Burt’s in laughter “ .

My goal for myself is to finally travel somewhere alone where I don’t know anyone and to be at peace again . I think for this time around I want to do Punta Cana ,DR . Being that I’m now getting into this whole travel thing I still haven’t been anywhere tropical . Once I get the hang of it the next stop is Bali , Indonesia .

If you are anything like me (Scary) just do a lot of research of the places you want to go . Start off with something that is a couple of hours on a plane . You want to get the hang of it at first . Make sure you also “money plan” . Write down what restaurants you want to eat at and look at the menus , check cab apps to see how far everything is and the cost/ see if the hotel has airport pick ups, if there are water sports that you want to do just try to do one if money is tight and last but not least DO NOT over pack . Luggage fees adds up and you won’t even wear half of the outfits you pictured in your head . Trust me I’m always over packing to wear three outfits lmao .

To my fellow travelers , you will gain that courage to travel and when you do those friends that you’ve been begging to go on vacation with will then come around wanting or wishes they took those trips with you .

-Simone

[cannedapricot]

Decorating the Christmas Tree with! Ong Seongwoo

christmas collab with @alliwannado-w1 and @jihoonslattee!!!

y’all have heard of haunted house part timer! ong seongwoo

now get ready for

shopping mall part timer! ong seongwoo!11!1!

ong never has a proper job in my aus sobdvosb

he originally applied for the job of being the mall gaurd

because in his opinion, the uniform was made for him

also he gets to kick whoever he wanted to out of the mall

cough the annoying couples cough

but he unfortunately got the job of cleaner :’’)

well,, at least he was a good looking cleaner

girls come up to him 27394 times a day asking for his number

to which he gives out fake numbers 

the girls can’t even be mad when they find out it was fake

his blinding smile makes them swoon and they forget everything lol

what kind of witchcraft

is in charge of cleaning the shop windows and wiping the floor on the second storey

lowkey hates it

but it’s better than cleaning the food court :)

it doesn’t stop him from complaining to mcdonalds part timer! daniel after hours though

daniel just grimaces because,

he??? worKS??? AT MCDONALDS????? LMAO HE WOULD MUCH RATHER CLEAN THE WINDOWS

on multiple occasions niel has asked ong,

“since you hate it so much, you wanna switch? :)”

“hahHAHAHA NO THANKS”

ong gets coupons from some stores he’s in charge of and it’s basically the only reason why he hasn’t quit the job and gone broke

christmas used to be ong’s favorite holiday

but ever since he started working, christmas season is basically a nightmare

everyone’s suddenly off work and/or school

and the mall doubles in people

so more people ask for his number and more mess is made on the floor

i mean,,,, ong tries to get out of working,,,,, but he’s pretended to be sick too many times

and unless he actually faints nobody’s gonna believe him rip

also the mistletoe the mall uses makes him sneeze

“lol someone’s talking shit about you again”

“no someone’s obviously missing me”

tbfh if i found a mall that has seongwoo cleaning, daniel working at mcdonalds, jisung, jaehwan and sungwoon working at the toy shop i wouLD LIVE IN THAT MALL DONT STOP ME

for once!! you actually work with seongwoo!!!11!1 arE YOU EXCITED

but uh,,, you weren’t exactly on good terms with him

yeah sure he’s good looking whatever

but every time you see him, he’s always slacking off one way or another

AND HE’S NOT EVEN ASSIGNED TO THE FOOD COURT

and he would be flirting with the female staff and just????

you don’t understand how someone could be so shameless

ong knows that you have something against him

your glares give it away lmao

jisung from the toy store claims that’s ong’s not that bad of a guy

“y/n you’re just too focused on seeing his bad side,,,, give the guy a chance”

cue ong sliding by on the cleaning trolley

“yeeeeeaaaaah ok”

“,,,,,,,,,,,,, i sweAR HE’S BETTER THAN THIS”

sungwoon just tells you about all the shit ong’s done which makes you dislike him more???? 

jisung tries to stop him,,,, it doesn’t work

“ong once lead a girl on in highschool”

“suNGWOON,,,,,, THAT’S A HOAX”

ong has, on multiple occasions, tried to get closer to you

but you shut him down before he could say anything

“hey-”

“sorry i have important matters to attend to”

“oh ok :c”

seongwoo has complained to daniel 472974 times about you 

and daniel’s loWKEY SICK OF HEARING ABOUT HOW YOUR GLARE CAN KILL PEOPLE

“are you sure you don’t have a crush on them”

“????crush??????psh no????”

yeah ok ong doesn’t have a crush on you yet

but he’s curious as to why you dislike him so much???

he can’t remember offending you in any way

and you seem to always have a way to escape from him whenever he slides up to you

THAT IS UNTILLLLLL

y’all get assigned to put up the humongous christmas tree 

YOU GUYS THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA BE A CUTE DOMESTIC FIC??? HA SIKE 

and you immediately come up with an excuse

but your boss isn’t having it

because,

“teamwork is important y/n!!! you can’t keep avoiding working with ong!”

BOVUBOSVBOSB 

YOU JUST HOPE THAT JISUNGS RIGHT ABOUT HIM NOT BEING THAT MUCH OF AN ASS

“oh hi y/n!!!”

after hours, ong was standing in the center clearing of the mall as the tree was getting put up

it was

h u g e

“it’s gonna take us all night huh?”

he smiles

yOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HE CAN BE OPTIMISTIC ABOUT THIS

“i just hope we’re getting payed extra”

you mumble, gritting your teeth

as ong deals with the guys putting up the tree, you head to the storage

it takes a while to find the box labelled “christmas” but you eventually do

and you make the stupid decision to carry three at once

you trip because you couldn’t see anything in front of you

bUT!!!

ONG APPEARS????

lol no you trip and fall

ong appears a second later to witness your pain

anD HE LAUGHS 

YOU START FUMING OUT OF ANGER AND EMBARRASSMENT

ong then picks up the boxes after his laughing fit and says,

“i’ll take care of the rest of the decorations, you go check if you’re hurt”

????why is he suddenly so nice

he’s always been nice y/n you jUST DON’T KN O W

and you suddenly feel like hm he’s not bad

bUT THEN SUNGWOON’S STORY OF ONG LEADING THAT GIRL ON FLASHES BACK INTO YOUR MIND

shuffling out of the room, your eyes meet with his

and you send him a glare

onG’S JUST

auiKUVDISVB????WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME

yOU SLAM YOUR FIST ON ONE OF THE BOXES

AND ONG FLINCHES

“let’s get to decorating the tree. the faster we do this, the sooner we’re done”

“YES SIR”

and without saying anything else, you turn and start hanging up baubles

most of the time,,,, you two were working in silence,,,,

ong would be sending you glances and trying to start convos but you’d just straight up ignore him

it gets to the point where seongwoo thinks he’s gonna burst

THE TENSION IN THE AIR WAS INSUFFERABLE 

so when the parts you two could reach from the ground was covered and the ladder was set,

ong decides to find out exactly why you dislike him so much

how????? by pinning you to the ladder of course

an intellectual am i right

“??????ONG SEONGWOO WHAT ARE YOU DOING--”

“why do you hate me”

“I- WHAT- UM-”

he looks you square in the eye and you find yourself spilling

“SUNGWOON SAID YOU LEAD A GIRL ON AND THAT KINDA MADE ME THINK THAT YOURE A SHIT ASSHOLE”

“??????????THAT SNITCH I KNEW I SHOULDN’T HAVE TOLD HIM”

“SO YOU ACTUALLY DID LEAD A GIRL ON”

“NO!!!!! THE GIRL LATCHED ONTO ME I DIDN’T DO SHIT I REJECTED HER THEN SHE TOLD THE SCHOOL ABOUT ME LEADING HER ON”

oh

wow how petty of the girl

but thinking of it

you reasons for disliking him were quite petty too

and you just now realize how godlike his visuals were up close???

buT YOUR ASS AIN’T ABOUT TO ADMIT YOUR HEART WAS BEATING 24923 MILES A MINUTE

SO YOU DO THE MOST LOGIC THING

PUSH HIM AWAY

ong: pretends to be hurt

you: pretends to be busy

“you don’t hate me anymore right”

“wow lets not get too ahead of ourselves”

seongwoo cracks a smile

becausE WOW YOU WERE BLUSHING AND YOU LOOKED ADORABLE WHILE SO

back to the tree coughs

ong decides to climb the ladder because,

“i need to show you how manly i am”

but he’s also,

“doN’T LET GO OF THE LADDER MY LIFE IS IN YOUR HANDS”

lets go

onG SCREAMS

while hanging up the sparkly tinsel, ong finds two santa hats

he chucks one down at you while he puts one on himself

“wtf?”

“wE CAN MATCH!!!”

“...how the fuck are you in your twenties”

ong sneezes every few minutes because of the stupid tinsel

you both get heart attacks when he does 

whAT IF HE FALLS DOWN

BRO YOU DONT WANNA GET CHARGED WITH MURDER OR SOME SHIT

it’s way past midnight when you’re nearly close to finished

all that was left was the star

ong pulls up your facebook profile picture and goes

“i should put you up there because you are my star”

UM

you shake the ladder in disagreement

SEONGWOO SCREAMS AND DROPS HIS PHONE

but thankfullly it lands in a pile of soft toys at the bottom of the tree :’)

he still makes a big deal out of it though :’)

screams at you to put your number in 

and keeps screaming until you do so and text yourself

just so he knows it’s your real number

after putting the actual star on top of the tree, climbs down so you guys can admire your work

“im gonna jump down”

“sure but i’m not catching you”

“how heartless :(”

so you turn off the mall’s lights and seongwoo turns on the tree’s lights

it was breathtaking

who cared if it was 5 in the morning

ong turned to look at you 

he had wanted to see your reaction but your beauty catches him off gaurd

and he ends up staring at you until your head suddenly drops on his shoulder

smiling even wider, ong whispers,

“good night”

bonus: y’all wake up the next morning to your boss looking at you two like, “ah young love”

daniel, jisung, sungwoon and jaehwan come in to see you jumping away from seongwoo

and they’re like,

“what did they fuck or something”

bonus x2: ong officially asks you on a date on christmas after weeks of flirting with you

he gives you a box, claims it’s your present while inside is a selfie of him with the words, “ong seongwoo, the most attractive man on this planet is asking you on a date. feel honored.” 

you still hate him

perhaps, just a little less now

i wILL NOT STOP PROMOTING MY TOY STORE WORKER! JISUNG OK LOVE MY SUNSHINE MAN

also this was written at 1am pls forgive me for shitty plot + shitty writing :’)

[spaceisours]

(1) what's the sweetest thing you've ever done for her and vice versa? (2) which of you would give the other a promise ring?? (3) just tell me something cute about your relationship or your girlfriend???[If you don't feel comfortable with the last one It's fine]

well we like to write and leave love letters for each other, so probably that weifhewifuer she also comes up to see me at work so i dont Dieprobably her?? i feel like i would want to but i would be too afraid lmaoas for a cute thing... 

she said something the other day like “kiss my half-Latina ass” to one of our friends and for some reason i thought that was the cutest thing?? like i always get rly siked when someone takes pride in themself and fsr i was just sitting there like damn... she rly did that...

[joohvuks]

hello angels n demons ! it’s me , uh kira , with the love of my life , PARK JOOHYUK . i love , redvelvetsus with my whole damn heart ! n marvel/dc , an*me n shopping by myself ! i’ve played joohyuk many times ( twice vc: twice! ) n i really wanted to bring him back in a rp , so that’s what i did ! im rlly excited to write him again ( hes a bit different from how i first imagined him tbh ) , & i’m also rlly excited to write with u all !! so to get to know joohyuk a lil more, i’ve written down some key things about him . at the end of it please give a big heart if ur interested enough to plot with me n joohyuk .. love me some validation

[ jeon jeongguk ] — hey there! this is [ PARK JOOHYUK ] and I go by [ he/him ], a [ twenty ] years old [ florist ] currently residing at [ daemun one bedroom apartment ] [ with my COUSIN ]. I am known around here for being [ b e n i g n ] but also [ taciturn ]. it’s nice to meet you!

WARNING: long because i dont know when to stop !

a BLESSING is what park jaehwan & kwon rohui called him after meeting fresh out the womb baby. although a little smaller & lighter than what was normal, his screams was proof that he was still a healthy boy ! his parents were excited to finally have their baby boy with them on this world, the baby they always wanted to have & now he’s finally here. ( HOSPITAL RECORDS: park joohyuk born march 20th 1997 on 09 55 pm . )

such a spoiled little thing he was, showered in affection & gifts ranging from secondhand iron man toys to hand me down clothes that were still too big for joohyuk  . money was a luxury for them , the parents just barely making ends meet with their 7-11esque store but for his parents , who always wanted to have a child of their own ; they would do everything for him. 

ask joohyuk what his childhood looked like & he would probably talk about tending the flowers in their backyard with his dad , learning about the different meanings of flowers and how to take care of them . he liked tending to the flowers during the spring months , more than he liked going to the playground near their home and having to play with the other kids. joohyuk always had the tendency to shy away from the neighbor aunties who would try to pinch his cheeks, and especially strangers. he wouldn’t even greet others if it wasn’t for his mother telling him to not be disrespectful. 

joohyuk likes flora but his true love is SINGING ! 

whether it be in his own room or in the bathroom, as long as it’s in the trusting & comfortable space of his home , he’d sing. sometimes even when his parents are in the same room as him too . his mother starts calling him her little songbird , his dad calls him sweet pea . joohyuk loves it . 

at age thirteen , an idol company scouted him ; having heard his singing when he passed by & joohyuk was well , embarrassed for the fact that the walls aren’t as thick as he thought they were but also very conflicted on what to do with being invited to do audition. the company wasn’t a big name like SM or YG , in fact joohyuk wasn’t even sure if he ever heard of the company before. his parents of course , were very excited to hear about the news ; of course they were , they were basically his BIGGEST stans . so they talked him into auditioning & after a lot of insecurity confessions n worries , joohyuk was packing a bag to get ready for the three hour train ride.

if he could’ve re-do his audition he would because it just wasn’t good , his voice cracked mid way through the song & he forgot his cue to start . tl;dr . it was absolute shit. and for joohyuk who didn’t want to audition in the first place, felt utterly heartbroken now after his audition. 

but miracles apparently do exist & three weeks after the audition , ( joohyuk almost forgot about it oops ! ) he got a call saying that he got in ! so a month after that , he was packing his bags & went on the same train back to seoul, his parents tagging along as they booked a stay at a guesthouse for a week so that joohyuk doesn’t miss them too much. 

during his trainee time , he felt incredibly lonely . his other fellow trainees tried to include him in their conversations & making him feel at ease but , joohyuk has always been the introvert type & always had trouble making friends. the other trainees didn’t bully him or anything but after so many attempts at befriending joohyuk they just started , ignoring him. 

the training period was hard , but joohyuk loves singing so much that it outweighs the cons . but five years later & with his debut date already set in stone , joohyuk just , couldn’t do it anymore. he hated singing in front of all those people, he cried every single evaluation &  he couldn’t stand the pressure, he couldn’t stand the thought of those guys he was going to be debuting with , knowing that he’d have to WORK with them & LIVE with them for the next who knows many years . joohyuk didn’t want to be a burden in a group where he wasn’t totally committed in. so he quit. 

the employees at the company weren’t all too happy with it , definitely not after spending the last five years making him into “ perfection “ . but , joohyuk still didn’t waver his decision even when he was drowning in the trainee debt. 

after that , joohyuk finished his high school . & college was expensive , and he doesn’t have much money even with the scholarship so it didn’t last long until joohyuk dropped that as well to work in a small flower store owned by a widow name jung haesoo . and he never returned to school again. 

HIS parents were disappointed in him , not the fact that he quit the trainee thing but more over that he dropped out of school . they believe that he won’t get a good future later since he doesn’t have an education , they only want the best for him they kept saying that to him but joohyuk didn’t listen. 

DAEMUN APARTMENT with one bedroom is his place of residence now , crashing the couch of his cousin who has kindly welcomed him . the place isn’t anything like his home in busan , far from it really but it’s still a place where he can make his home into.

DHFKLDSF UHH IF U MANAGED TO READ ALL OF THAT THEN I APPLAUD YOU , WE’RE LIKE ALMOST DONE WITH THIS I PROMISE

after all this years, the one thing joohyuk isn’t good at is still talking to strangers . he’s incredibly shy , even having a hard time walking up to a customer needing assistance , but he’s .. working on it probably. he needs a good five minute to hype himself up before walking towards the customers tbh . he’s very , sweet too . he’s really , sweet lmao... tries to see the best in everyone , he’s got his heart in the right place. his biggest flaw is well , he doesn’t know when to stop giving. so please , don’t take too much advantage of him djfslksjf . sike do it. 

[ extras ] talking & singing to the flowers thinking that they’ll grow , being able to watch any & every horror movie . taking the stairs to his apartment instead of the elevator . succulent on the window sill . remembering the customer’s orders . secret stash of tea underneath the register . blushing easily . making himself smaller than he actually is . liking dogs but being allergic to them . 

[ PLOTS ] well , he actually he needs all of them friends , crushes , mayhaps enemies . i do have a very unfinished plots page in the works so , uhh i’ll link it when it’s done ! but in the mean time i absolutely do not mind brainstorming so yeah : ) . please give this  a like if u want to plot hdjsfkldsjf 

and thank you so much for reading this demon of an intro !

[thesixthh0ekage]

Please go off about Rise of Skywalker, I want the tea

You don’t have to tell me twice bro, here I go! 

So Rey turned out to be a palpatine LMFAO! it was honestly so bizarre that i sat there stunned for a minute cause i just could not believe it. like they really just DROPPED that on our fucking heads with no warning, and for no reason! was the fact that she used force lightning supposed to be the give away?! i just want to know why they’d do that! especially after they spent two movies drilling in the fact that she was NO ONE, and even had kylo tell her explicitly, TO HER FACE & on purpose to hurt her feelings, that they were no one and sold her for booze money. i get that he was supposed to be ~evil~ and ~the villain~, but that was dumb as hell and they went out of their way to make us feel like, ok she really is just a nobody! she spent all this time making up shit about her heritage just to make herself feel better like a child would, but, like most childish dreams, it just wasn’t true! and then they just go SIKE LMAOOOOO  y’all are dumb and believed us, she’s been a secret PALPATINE this whole fucking time. like... i have to laugh on that one. what was the reason?!  clearly they only did it so that could have a big GOTCHA jaw-dropping moment. and you know what, i guess it was jaw-dropping. but for ME, it was shocking because it just came from left fucking field. 

another thing was finn and rose having their own separate storyline in TLJ, just for them to be non-fucking-existent in rise of skywalker. i don’t even know what else to say about THAT but it was so dumb. finn was supposed to be revealed to be force sensitive and they even alluded to it at the end (he had some weird ~feeling~ and that’s why he knew something he would have no fucking way of knowing unless he was force sensitive!), and just did NOTHING with it. it made me mad as hell! 

and speaking of finn, i have to ask why THEE FUCK they just threw in some random masked woman for poe to flirt with and then do nothing with it at all. we could have had some real beautiful romance between two characters that made fucking SENSE together but disney is too scared of the white dudebros to commit and write a fucking good story. rose was a casualty of that as well because they really just threw her in and had her kiss finn at the end of TLJ JUST so they could kill the idea that finn and poe were into each other, just to drop that fucking story all together lmfao. fucking ridiculous, dude.

next is the whole “herp derp hux was the resistance spy all along!” thing! lmfao where in the FUCK did that come from?! did they ever foreshadow anything like that in the first two movies?! or are we supposed to assume that hux turned on the whole first order (which he AND his fucking father dedicated their entire lives to btw) just because kylo killed snoke and took over as supreme leader?! like??? maybe i missed something early on, but if it’s the latter i am SCREAMING because number one that was absolutely stupid, but it was also PETTY as fuck of hux to just decide to turn because he was pissed that kylo outranks him now. i am done. 

now lets talk about the ~dyad in the force~... BITCH! they really pulled that one outta their asses. i know you could argue that they foreshadowed that all along (i.e. TFA when kylo tells rey not to be afraid & that he can “feel it too” 🙄 & then p much all of TLJ) but imo they did a shitty job of explaining that THAT was what it was. the fact that i can’t remember if they said whether or not luke knew about this whole dyad in the force business either. if he did someone pls correct me lmao. but going on the assumption that he did not, HOW?! all the fucking talk in the prequel trilogy about PROPHECIES and BALANCING the force and yet not ONE of these mfs in the new republic knew anything about a force dyad or were on the lookout for that shit?! why wait till the last minute of the last movie to fucking reveal that?! then, they did nothing to try to explore or strengthen their connection to one another so for rey to just straight up teleport him his mama’s lightsaber at the end like that blew me lmfao i’m sorry. they didn’t earn that at all and i wish they had done a better job because, as a concept, the idea of it is COOL.

i won’t go in on leia cause we all know there was nothing that could be done about that, but i will say i actually LIKED that rey was able to get her lightsaber. that was nice. 

a minor thing but lmfao chewie died and then he wasn’t dead. all for no real reason at all other than to make rey Snap™ and use her evil force lightning ability that she’d never ever used before! 

there are probably other things that i am missing, or hell maybe i am being too hard on it, but idk! i don’t feel like that was the ending we all deserved. ESPECIALLY given how fucking amazing i thought the force awakens was. it was just a major disappointment, and i feel like it was a waste of 4 years getting hyped for it all lmao

[survivoratomic-acadia]

Confessionals!

Hi it is Olivia! So I don't have the gifs of this season or the player banners so this will be separated by day since I was just an intern and didn’t keep track of confessionals or what day it was when they were posted. Its just all of the confessionals for this season on one post. Sorry for the delay!

5/22

Tim

WHY ARENT I ON THE PRETTY TRIBE! I love Aren already he seems super fun and chill! Certain people... however make me wonder why they are all stars.. jk lmao Im here to have fun and do great!

Aren

Spoiler alert, the f3 is trixie/madison/aren!!!

QuilLynn

So its me, QuilLynn, Two-time winner, next first boot of atomic! I'm happy to be with Dana, but idk about the rest of tribe. I don't really click with anyone, so i'll probably just try to let dana have the social game and i'll just like cling to her coat tails until merge or a swap. I'm trying to be my catty self and form a pretty girls alliance with Dana and Sarah since we are all Iconic woman winners, but I know Sarah will be more loyal to dan, or I think it at least. I'll fill you in more later, gotta go mingle! <3 xoxo gossip ho

Stephen

Its what, one hour into the game and I already love sarah. i knew this season was going to be crazy, it is after all all-stars. So that means no inactives to vote out round one. Eek. So I’ve got to work fast to make those social connections and try and get myself a place in whatever majority forms if we lose immunity. Which we wont. I love creative writing, if we lose this because of my writing I might as well give up writing altogether.

Aundra

"THIS IS BRAZY!! Going into this im ""like Jesus do i want any IOS people in?"" ""theres going to be at least one, right?"" SIKE! THERES 3!! i cant deal im super excited that tim and heather are in the same game as me because they're great people Stephens also here which is awkward a little but i dont really feel like theres any bad blood between us, we've basically made up since IOS . ALSO IM ON A TRIBE BUILT MOSTLY FROM WINNERS. I really wanted to have some winners on my tribe that way i could have hopefully a built in alliance but all winners except one is on my tribe thats so much pressure. And unlike most games ive had a small convo with just about everyone on my tribe/ know them or i like them. this game is definitely going to be different experience and hopefully it will be a long and fulfilling im really looking forward to this season.

my game plan for right now is to get on the good side of all the people that haven't won a game yet and get the other winners out. target #1 QuilLynn SHE HAS WON TWICE. did they let sandra make it to merge?? NO do i want to go far with her in this game? NO is she probably a great person? MAYBE but i dont want to take chances and im gonna be pretty limited at the begging of this game so hopefully the will let me survive long enough to establish myself apart of this game.  

Hopefully this game is worth it and is as fun is it was last time even if like time i was sent into a depressive mode thanks pressure last time i think i can take it this time! lmao                                                                                                 xoxo, gossip girl "

5/23

Madison

TOO MANY PEOPLE I KNOW. TOO MANY PEOPLE THAT HATE ME. I’M GONNA DIE SO FAST. 

Dan

"So I like a lot of my tribemates which is cool because if I didn’t I would have quit night one and thrown all the rice in the fire. There’s a ton of Lago representation, which I’m not surprised about, but am v concerned about. It’s like when you were in like 7th grade and you had those friends you talked to every day and then summer came and y’all didnt talk for a while and you come back for 8th grade and things are chill and you catch up, but they still know you’re better than them in every way.

This first challenge is....a choice. I love Cameron with all of my heart normally, but this makes me only love him with my right atrium, so there’s that. I havent taken an English class since 12th grade so y’all know I’m basiclally illiterate now.

I’m just hoping for a cute little jury placement and play a more UTR Sammy-esque game this time around. I know that eventually the wheels will fall off of that plan and I’ll go into full on neurotic, here, queer, and not going anywheer mode where I win like 6 consecutive immunities, but for the mean time I’m goung to try to be diverse, and show I’m not a one trick homosexual. "

Sarah

"Hey so let me just tell yall im stoked for this season bc im back for ALL STARS!

First season winner and flop returning again.

I adore this cast and the fact that I have been put on a tribe with all the winners (except  luke) is amazing. we created a girl winner alliance right away with me, dana and quillynn. I adore them so much!

Also im connecting with stephen and i think he likes me! I will prob be able to control him a tiny bit this season so lets see how that goes :~)

I just want to let yall know there will rocks this season bc me and julia are back! Were not on the same tribe but i adore that bitch and shes just as equal craziness as me

So far i have connections af and i havent burned any bridges with the ppl in this game so im literally in love

Jay will probably want to get me out asap but fuck u im on my own tribe OK

Anyways just like s1 i have an alliance made almost immediately and i have connections!

Also i did the whole immunity so incase we lose they will feel guilty of voting me out WHHAAHAHAHHA

Anyways ill be back later with more news"

Aundra

"A tribe full of mostly winners.. in a way sounds ideal. It’s not the only person that’s attempt the first challenge is Sarah and Sammy helped out i wrote half of one which is better than I bet majority of team has done I highly doubt we’re going to win the challenge becaus Sarah’s story is not all that great it lacks anything it’s just boring but aleast she tried she put forth some effort toward the challenge and I honestly don’t want to go to a tribal that would be the worst also did I forget to mention that the idol system for this season is the exact same way as IOS which I suched and was probably the worst person in the moors of all time cannot l t me just make merge so I can have and isle of skye reunion with my main man tim cause I really need someone that would be my ride or die and I wouldn’t have to worry about betraying me

Also I QuilLynn is a really cool person it would be hard to vote them out ( I think that’s there pronoun caus ewhen we were talking she started using we and what not so I’m gonna call her they/them for now on) and Duncan obviously did some sorta research on the cast cause he came at me with basically my whole tumblr survivor history. I gotta watch him closely                                 Xoxo, gossip girl "

Tim

"Everyone: oh this challenge is so cute its gonna be great

Me internally: It's ok but I thought I'd see it at swap or something its not my favvvorite

Also them: Doesn't write anything for the challenge but some gives ideas

Me: Guess I'll just... write."

Well I just wrote my story for the tribe and trixie drew some bomb ass pictures! It really brought the story to life a bit and I appreciate the partnership effort!

Stephen

"Duncan: Don’t backstab me okay? Me sharpening my knives: Unfortunate Like I love the guy but anyone who asks for an alliance day one can easily become a target or an asset. If we end up losing this challenge I will either throw him under the bus of us or us him to get numbers. Also about this challenge, I feel really bad for not having more input, especially after I bragged about my writing. But tbh this prompt is very specific, and doesn’t really mesh with my style of writing. And by the time I had caught up with messages and read what Sarah had written it was 11:30. Sorry guys."

Duncan

https://youtu.be/5PLE0dQ1mIk

Aundra

"this is going to sound completely under believable but it’s all true and happened day while I was in the the Acadia Mountains on a afternoon hike. So I was walking having a very nice time enjoying a new trail I’d never taken before. It was longer than most and seemed to never end, I almost thought I was going around in circles. When I was finally about to give up my gps went off saying I was near a geocache! So like any normal person I went to go it. When i found the capsule it began to glow. Strongly and brightly it started to shine. I’d never seen a geocache this big so I decided I was going to take it the I noticed something weird on it it had names next to dates on it. QuilLynn- 1902 Samuel- 1913 Dana- 1940 Sammy- 1953 Dan- 1969 Sarah- 1982 Stephen- 1986 Heather- 2000 Duncan- 2012 Aundra- 2018

I had no idea what this list meant or who these people were, I’d so find out. I started my way back to my car but never made it back that day. Once I began to try and leave the geocache started heating up. It became so I dropped it. I would’ve ran off then and there but I started hearing a voice. “Give me what I want and I’ll give you what you want!” Said the dark and gargled voice. “What do you want?” I said quickly to scared to think of anything else to say. “Your soul!” Whisper little voices so close to my ear I could feel there lips nibbling on my earlobes. I got chills and started panicking breathing heavy. Fast. Hard. Deeply. I thought I was gonna pass out but surprisingly stayed awake. “What do o get in return?” I asked the voice. “Happiness” it shot back quickly. “Ok, have it.”

That’s the half of the story I wrote defiantly better than Sarah’s but it’s whatever hopefully her story can pull through with a W                                  Xoxo, gossip girl "

Dan

"Our story is........... garbage honestly.

What happened to Heather’s amazing 7 deadly sins story line??? We got a stale piece of white bread with no plot or anything with just food jokes??? Sarah did her best yes, but when your best is subpar it’s kinda hard to like win a challenge ya know? "

Heather

Wow first confessional after immunity, we stan a mess. So before anyone can get situated we get our challenge thrown at us and of course it is something I am actually terrible at: WRITING. Hun I cant write for shit. But I came up with a great idea that I thought would really sell the judges being the 7 deadly sins. However there are 10 people so 3 would be the ones who find the geocache and use the items in it to fend off the other 7 who are possessed by the sins. Everyone was like super excited for it, but Sarah didn't use it in the writing, which is upsetting since I really wanted to be sloth and be fended off with like Nyquil or something, but aye that's how shit is. Now I guess its time to get these bitches on my side and find out who to get rid of.

5/24

Duncan

so we lost. Obviously i'm not thrilled about it but I'm not filled with rage or anything like that. If i go home first I'll be a little surprised but I don't think thats going to happen. What I'm kind of hoping to form is a foursome of me dan heather and sammy. I think that would be a very strong group at least for now. As for the longevity of the group? I don't know. I just know I told dan and sammy individually that i want to work with them and heather is someone who dan trusts. Sammy and Dan played lago together so hopefully they'll be on good terms. This way Dan can kind of be seen as the leader of the group and if anyone tries to take a shot at the grouping later down the road it will be his head on the line and not mine. As for who goes home at tribal? I don't think people will vote for Quil or Dana as not to stir the pot. We can't vote out Sarah. It would be mcfucked if we did that to her. So that leaves Stephen, Aundra and Samuel. Obviously I would like to keep Stephen around because he can be an asset to me moving forward. As for Aundra and Samuel?  think Aundra is a little enigmatic but i like him. I also like Samuel, he was the last person to add me but we've been talking the most out of all people that are brand new to me. Speaking of being brand new. I kind of want to talk to Heather and Aundra and be like "THIS IS ALL STARS!! WHY Y'ALL ACTING BRAND NEW!?!" because I've talked to them like the bare minimum. Do you know the untucked where that quote was from? God i love untucked. Where was I? Oh yeah. Hopefully they don't send my ass packing first. I haven't thrown out any names, hopefully someone can throw out a name by noon tomorrow. I'll report back later if i have time. xoxo gossip gorl. also woo mitch! im going to try and win this for us since we were robbed in alcatraz <3

Luke

"Hi hello we won immunity and that’s pretty iconic! I like a majority of my tribe but I’m SCARED of if we have to go to tribal because I think I will DIE!

Opinions on my tribe:

Aren: he’s iconic! He’s british and we hit it off right away, I think he’s going to make a great ally for me!

Carson: I love Carson so much ahhhh, I’m excited to see him in this game because we always work really well together. He’s definitely a number for me.

Chris: last time I played with Chris was in Great Lakes when he had a premade to help him get to the end so I can’t wait to get my revenge lol (:

Julia: I love Julia but she always makes it difficult to work with her because she always explodes on somebody and people want her out because of it. I hope she stays a little calm this game because I could use her.

Madison: uggghhhh. I like Madison, I do. She just got me out in BBFurby and I am a LITTLE bitter about but she says she wants to work with me. I believe her like...70% because I think that she’ll take the opportunity to take me out when she can. So I need to get her first.

Ruthie: My Dead Sea queen!! We worked so well together in Dead Sea and she was vital in my plans to win and it worked out for me. I hope she wants to work with me again!

Tim: Tim is one of two people I didn’t know coming into my tribe but he’s super sweet! Our conversations have been nice so far!

Trixie: ugh stupid furby BITCH! i hate this SKANK i want her to CHOKE she will be first boot and we made it no secret in PMs we hate each other >:( HEHE JK i love this bitch can’t wait to work with her again "

Trixie

"Trixie's Alcatraz Confessional Strike Receipt #1

[2018-01-25, 9:51:48 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Admin): Pls trixie [2018-01-25, 9:51:51 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Admin): ur gonna get another strike [2018-01-25, 9:52:02 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Admin): why… why are u like this "

Dana

"There are NOT enough horses on this Island Cameron!!!!

Ok but fr me, Sarah, and my mother Quail have a Pretty Girls Only Alliance. This is a strategy Quil and I have used before, where we rope in a third girl and work with her, but Sarah is smart af so idk if she'll just like work with us and not ask questions.

Then we all made a winners alliance, which I love. But the only problem is I have a cersh on Sammy... so we can't vote him out NEVER EVER. "

Jay

I haven't really done much but i want to make the weed alliance aka me chris and Julia

Heather

Ok so when I saw Stephen here I was like " Hey maybe we can make amends and work together this season" Then all of a sudden people are targeting him. Also Aundra is on my tribe which if anyone doesn't know I adore Aundra well I do. But he is having wifi problems which sucks. I also heard Samuel's name which I would much rather like to roll with. Ughh too many icons tho why u do this. Right now I seem to be working a lot with Dan and Sammy a bit ( Wow Lago thanks a lot) even though Dan idoled me out but he d=cant do that this game cause of NO FUCKING IDOLS. Speaking of advantages I got me a heavy rock. The heavy rocks power is that I can throw it at someone at tribal and cause them not to vote. I laughed so hard when I got it cause who doesn't want to throw a rock at someone. I am really loving this violent all star season. I hope next time I hunt I get a heavier rock where I can throw it at someone to get them out of the game. hehe

Sam

Wig going okay so far!!

Ruthie

I'm SO glad that I'm on a tribe with so many creative people, i'm super busy until tomorrow and i'm just READY for summer vacation so I'm glad I'm not flailing about to save myself.  I've connected a bit with Aren after not talking to him in like two years so that's nice!

Tim

Their story was cute! But you know gorgeous (our story) next to cute. Gorgeous is just gonna devour cute. [Plz tell me yall get this reference lol]"

Our efforts actually won us the comp.. I feel so inspired to write now.

This is the season that I came to play hard and win. These comps bettee get ready because Im giving it my all and not giving up.

Ali

just popping in to say cam & olivia are the DREAM TEAM and I lav them both :)

Sammy

okay so woo i have a lot to talk about kinda...so i usually make an intro saying how i feel about everyone but umm let’s skip that. The cast is super cool but I have to be super careful because I’m playing with the best of the best? Anyways I wasn’t around to help with the story that much but I did go through and edit stuff I saw...so I did something! There were three names going around today and they were Samuel, Aundra, and Stephen. Now Stephen probably thinks that like it was me that is trying to go for him but his name was brought to me? I know we kinda said we wouldn’t target each other this round buttt he usually lies to me so why not. He took me out of the last couple games we were in together and I feel like he has something against me? Idk. So yeah...and last night i did the trails thing and I freaking got caught by a park ranger for touching a rock. I’m so dumb. The whole tribe knows I was searching:/ rip. Anyway I’m trying to get the numbers on my side and Duncan wants an alliance with me him dan and Heather. But also I might be getting myself into a little group with Dana and quill and hopefully sarah? Idk but woo.

Aundra

"So look im not that smart and all im looking for is the Ali to my Jay and right now, seems like thats not possible. So we lost immunity like i said we were going to because it was obvious any who QuilLynn decides to make a winners alliance which im definitely not going to say no to that because thats safety and numbers for a little while BUT im stupid and may have just leaked the whole thing to Duncan who i thought was a winner and isn't. ik he pays very close attention to things (or at least i think so) and this could really bad on my part and to my game hopefully it wont and all is good

QuilLynn is like a really cool person but im on to them i just have to wait till the perfect moment to strike or to get voted off lmfao but im watching them. Stephen is unfortunately the vote tonight which really suck because i wanted to kinda work on our relationship from the last game that we played in. He doesn't really deserve this but it has to happen to everyone . im also thinking of becoming very close to QuilLynn they say keep your friends close and your enemies closer for a reason                                                                                  xoxo, gossip girl"

Carson

"Wow I like most of my tribe?? Everyone is really funny and I actually don’t want to quit on day 2. Who would have thot.

Being on a tribe with Chris stoner AGAIN is terrible, but Luke is also here and that makes up for it. I cannot wait to vote him out for playing me in Alcatraz! "

Stephen

So I have heard absolutely nothing about the vote, then I ask Aundra. So then he messages me saying he’s voting Samuel, but before I can respond he deletes the message. Then claims it was a link he sent to the wrong person. Wow, glad to see he’s gotten less messy since Isle of Skye, but he did win that one so I should never underestimate him. I wouldn’t be surprised if I went home tonigh with all this radio silence, so I’m voting Samuel on the off chance I can survive.

Julia

So like these hoes so boring. I rly h8 Chris stoner, and I’ve been so high idk what’s really been happening I’m floating rly bad rn but idrc

Chris Stoner

"So I’ve been in Denver! Not good timing but it’s all good cause we won the first comp and now I’m home to socialize and compete.

Instantly me and jay clicked. Jays a cool dude. I don’t expect jay to take me far but I do think he knows I will work him.

I’ve also talked a bit with Tim and Aren. Both are cool dudes. I played with Luke and Julia before, both whom were against me. So should be fun to see how all these relationships play a role. Hopefully it’s not too bad. "

5/25

Heather

SO Immunity just ended and I am a little bit nervous about it. I definitely did the most for my tribe so hopefully I can pull out a win. We had some people like NOT EVEN PARTICIPATE. Like we in allstars bitches we gotta not flop ughh. I feel bad for voting out Stephen last round because I wanted to talk to him about flipping the vote, but he didn't get on until I was in a concert. Samuel I don't think participated so I can prob get votes on him. IF WE NEED TO WHICH I FEEL LIKE WE WILL. (Im Cam messaging to confess while I am in the midst of it I love you hehe) I hope this didn't put a target on my back, or do it. welp time to go hunting for shit

Tim

Um this challenge is so rushed and Aren and Julia are dead!!!

Madison, who is arguably one of the most beneficial members of the tribe so far, sat out and Im not sute if were gonna win!

Heather

I swear I am about to rip out my hair. I got the most points in the whole hunt and WE STILL LOST. I GOT FOR OVER HALF MY TRIBES POINT. I AM PISSED AND AM ABOUT TO STRANGLE A BITCH BUT THIS BITCH GOTTA BE SWEET.

5/26

Aundra

"So QuilLynn is my new favorite person i mean they kinda already were but like now it official because the feeling are both ways and i could be happier on other news we lost immunity again and im pretty surprised at how close it came down to right now it votes are between Sarah and Samuel. Sarah's apart of the winners alliance so i doubt they'll want to vote her out which i kinda do because im looking at the bigger picture. winners are very intimidating to me and the more there are in the game the scarier im going to be. this round shouldn't result in me going home if the odds are in my favor. ( also if you couldnt understand my wonderfull story sorry that it had alot of typos)                                                                                     xoxo, gossip girl      P.s. I know that its going to be revealed pretty obvious who gossip girl is when these get posted but it so fun to sign off everything with it so your gonna have to live with it.  "

Chris Stoner

Nothing much.  We keep winning which is nice. Gives me some time to find an alliance. I still feel pretty isolated because of my schedule. It’s hard to talk to ppl. I’m sure I’m the easy boot. So maybe a swap will come soon 

Dan

So I feel like I’m personally in a good spot even though we keep losing. I’m on good terms with basically everyone left. Duncan offered me an out of the winners alliance that won’t effect any of my relationships with them. I guess Aundra accidentally leaked the winners alliance to Duncan thinking he was a winner, but Duncan and I talked things out and all is good. I was aligned with him before them and I explained it was a one week kinda thing for me personally to make sure a winner didn’t go home first. So now we have a target of Aundra bc he done goofed haha. Byeeee

Luke

Hi nothing is happening because we won immunity woo! i have some seaglass which is cute so i look forward to using that WOO! Aren made himself a target by not submitting which makes me sad but Julia is basically inactive so I lowkey hope we vote her out first looool 

Sammy

ahh okay so I’m super tired and like I’m flying to California and I have been up for over 24 hours...ANYWAY I did what I could in the scavenger hunt and I think some people didn’t really try. I’m just in so many games but like the problem is I forget I apply for them and I’m like uh oh. I think aundra is going home tonight but at the same time it could be me because I haven’t talked to anyone. I’m trying to find a good balance between the way I played in Alcatraz and the way i played in Lago and hopefully make it far!! 

Ruthie

So I’m really sad that a few people didn’t participate in the selfie hunt but I am happy that so many people did and even more happy that we’re safe another week! I suspect that we’re going to swap tribes soon though which is kind of frightening!! 

Quil

So this is a MESS. Aundra “accidnetally” leaked the winners chat to Duncan. Now I LOVE Aundra but this has made him the target. I’ve been trying my best to help with damage control but people still want to vote him!!! I’m trying to push to get Duncan out because I like just don’t trust him, idk UGH. 

Duncan

its round two and im going home because i worked all day and wasn't able to contribute to the challenge at all rip. I trust that Sammy, Samuel, and Dan wouldn't vote me out but if Aundra teams up with the girls and gets them to vote for me I'm donezo. Aundra leaked the winners chat thing and has basically ghosted me all day and I appreciated their story the first round but if they want me out he can go. Dan told me that Quil and Dana were going back and forth about voting out me or Aundra and if I am safe tonight?? Thank god for Dan. That man can do magic. I just want to spend some more time on the island but i don't know if I'm gonna last in these conditions tbh. The game has only just started and to go home now in round two would be like going to orlando but not going to disney world. Like I want to ride space  mountain so badly, i dont want to go.

5/27

Duncan

Okay so a lot of shit happened. Firstly Samuel got med evacd from the game this canceling tribal council. Like that’s crazy, I really liked him and wanted to work with him but his dog passed so he might be in a funk and I just hope he’s not depressed and he’s doing okay at this point. Now at the same time this could’ve been a blessing or a curse. If everyone was lying to me and I was going out the door then this was a blessing and I’ve been given a second life. As for if aundra was leaving? Then this is a curse. But who can never be sure besides the hosts I suppose. Then we get told to drop our buffs. Drop these buffs honey? I’ll drop more than just this buff honey! Ohhhhh hooooooonnnneeeeeyyyyyy! So yeah! I’ll talk more about my new tribe later 

5/28

Tim

Im really vibing with everyone on my tribe all of them are really neat. The person I've bonded least with is Dana unfortunately.

Carson

HALF OF MY FUCKING TRIBE DIDNT SUBMIT... THE CLOWNS HAVE JUMPED OUT. I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT I SPENT THE TIME I SHOULD HAVE BEEN SLEEPING ON THESE PEOPLE. I JUST WANT TO MERGE SO I CAN PLAY WITH LUKE AND WE CAN COWIN AND EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE

Aundra

"Idk if I already said this but I was probably going to be voted out because of how I told Duncan about the alliance on accident so he and Samuel decide to try to get me out idk if I would’ve stayed if Samuel didnt get med evac because he didn’t vote lmao what a dummy. We had swap which was nice mainly because I got to stay with most of the people in cool with include my allstars bff QuilLynn and Tim now!!! Happy that he and I can work together this time instead of directly against eachother I really like this tribe as a whole really and see good things going for us till we make merge which I feel will be soon do to the amount of people getting evacuated. What’s up with all these allstars being flops?                                    Xoxo, gossip girl "

Jay

I'm so sad that Julia is gone but that's okay bc I have a new alliance. Honestly I made 0 bonds with anyone on my original tribe other than Julia, Chris, and Tim. So once I joined this tribe I immediately went to Sarah and Duncan and said I wanted to work with them. Which I mean, it's half true. I want to work with Duncan far into the game, but Sarah needs to go sooner rather than later. So my thought is I want to take out Madison or Trixie, doesn't matter to me. And then MAYBE try to see if I could take out Sarah the next time. She doesn't have to go that soon but if I can make it happen, I'd like it to happen.

Dan

I’m so pissed I wasted so much time and energy on that stupid ass game for nothing!!! I love life rn, couldn’t be happier (: 

5/29

Dana

Nothing is happening. I like Dan more than I thought he would and we made a cute alliance chat. 

Tim

Rip Aren also me, Aundra, and Quilynn might become a thing!!

Ruthie

"real life is SO overwhelming right now, i thought the summer would give me more time but it's... quite the opposite these days!  As far as the game goes I am SO glad that our tribe is safe and that we don't have to see tribal for another week.  I think it was SO lucky too hehe.

I've really connected a lot with Duncan, right now he's the person I would say I'm the closest to! "

Aundra

"Guess who found a hidden item!!? MEEE!! I found the magnifying glass which many already know allows me to see who someone voted for. This will definitely come on handy if there is a suspected rat and I got to find them hopefully this isn’t the only thing I find on my walks away from camp. Watch out cause I got eyes everywhere lol                                     Xoxo, gossip girl "

Quil

the new pokemon games look so cute!!! Also love Aundra and Tim, trying to set up a side alliance with them that can take out the other winners down the line! Honestly if I make merge with the right people, we might be looking at my 3rd win folks!

Luke

My new tribe is actually pretty lit now. We’ve bonded by being the hosts’ favourites and winning two challenges! Same can’t be said for the other flops. I want to make an OG Bernard alliance with Carson and Chris to secure my spot in this game and make sure I’m not voted out before another swap. I need to be reunited with my friends!

5/30

Chris Stoner

So swap happened! I def feel swapfucked. 3/5 ppl on my tribe were on opposite sides as me in past games. The fourth person, heather, probably knows at least one of those 3 and will just go with them for an easy vote. Luckily we won and I did a lot in the challenge so I hope that keeps me around. I need another swap or merge... my days are limited with this tribe. 

5/31

Dan

I’m so over these creative challenges. I rarely have time for them which sucks because I’d have time for challenges that are more typical. You know damn well we won’t end up producing anything of substance, Heather’s tribe will submit something oscar worthy, and we’ll be going back to tribal 

Ruthie

My tribe... once again has not stated anything yet. I feel like this is gonna be another mess 

Sammy

nothing insane is going on but like we have a lip sync challenge and I’m not home yet so this sucks hahah, I’m glad that we are doing good as a tribe and honestly everyone seems to be super kind and nice about everything. So we def have good tribe dynamics. I really enjoy playing with heather this time because in lago we were kind of against each other. I’m hoping we can work more together this game and I also hope me and Carson could work well. Oh and Luke, he puts off really good vibes and I click with him well.

Ruthie

I REALLY hope my tribe gets their act together this time around. Friday is... tomorrow. 

Sarah

I hate my tribe they can all die in a pit of fire...that is all

Quil

"https://youtu.be/vis4R2MfzNA xoxo"

6/1

Duncan

Umm so we tribe swapped and MY TRIBE SUCCS EGGS!! it’s me and Sarah with jay, ruthie, trixie, and Madison. Ironically despite how inactive our tribe is we have the most members at this point in time. Julia got med evacd after the reward challenge and after the last immunity challenge, which we did not even attempt to complete, we learned the other tribe had forfeited the challenge and decided to have their tribal that night. We’re blessed as fuck to be ahead of the game right now but luck can’t last forever. We have had three days to do this movie trailer challenge but no one is ever on. I threw a while fucking idea and script out there but nothing ever came of it. If I go home because of my tribe’s inability to come together I’m gonna have a bitch fit

Sammy

literally like i keep suggesting things or asking questions and nobody responds I’m so annoyed. The only one that even responds to me some is heather...i really hope we win the challenge or i could be going home:/

Ruthie

So Madison and I just did the whole trailer by ourselves and Madison is doing 95% of the work, my lines took less than 5 minutes to film what the heck is the rest of our tribe doing 

Tim

It appears as if QuilLynn has gone inactive and our tribe isn't going to submit which is sad! Just send me to final 3 tbh. Also our trailer had a cute concept ngl.

Olivia

REMEMBER THIS DAY AS THE DAY QUIL TURNED IN THE VIDEO LITERALLY 30 SECONDS BEFORE THE DEADLINE AND RIGHT BEFORE WE WERE GOING TO NOT ACCEPT ANYTHING FROM THE TRIBE BC THEY DIDNT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION 

Carson

Heather is the proud owner of my wig whew

Aundra

"Guess who isn't going to tribal for the first time since the game started!!?? MEEE finally i dont have to try and vote out someone and make sure that im safe from getting voted. tbh i really like my tribe and would've hated to have to vote someone off i would really enjoying playing with all of them once we make merge if there are people left in the game to make merge with. these people are being such flops and not submitting confessional or voting its almost like what was the point of saying yes to playing the game. if only we had some real players in the game so i could be stressed and depressed /                                                                                                xoxo, gossip girl P.s. i know im not a girl but i can understand why someone would sign off with it its fun typing xoxo it makes me feeling like i run something lmaoo"

6/2

Stoner

. I’ve never gone to tribal yet this game and I want to keep it like that. I have a feeling the second I go to tribal I’m gone. Unless I merge. If I make merge I’ll have some more options and places to run and hide. I’ve tried talking to people and forming bonds but it’s just not working. 

Trixie

"Trixie's Alcatraz Confessional Strike Receipt #2

[2018-01-31, 5:16:08 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Admin): Hello you have not yet made a confessional this round! Pls do that!

[2018-01-31, 5:17:33 PM] Trixie Stale-Werthers: im so sorry the link isn’t working for me

[2018-01-31, 5:17:48 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Admin): Sure jan

[2018-01-31, 5:18:19 PM] Trixie Stale-Werthers: im so sorry but something really bad is about to happen and there’s nothing i can do to stop it

[2018-01-31, 5:18:41 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Admin): can u not [2018-01-31, 5:18:48 PM] Cameron Bee-Culpepper (Atomic Admin): Can u just make a damn confessional

Heather

"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXmXsntB4RM

This was earlier BUT EVERYONE STEPPED UP AND WE WON THAT SHIT HEHEHE"

Luke

AW THE MOVIE TRAILER CHALLENGE WAS SO CUTE IT WAS SO FUN SEEING OUR TRAILER AND WE ALL INPUTTED SO IT WAS ICONIC! I love the Bernard tribe we work really well together and have won every challenge thus far. The other tribes are messy and have big players on them so it’s going to be interesting to see who leaves tonight. Maybe a winner? That’d be shookening. Although I do like this tribe I’d love a swap or something, there’s never much wiggle room on a tribe as small as this but for now I’m content. Still need to work on that Carson/Chris/Luke alliance. Nothing much else to update on. Happy pride! ^.^ 

Dan

We won woo love life no one talks to me

Carson

We surprisingly killed that challenge after waiting until the last possible minute to start it. I’ve been really impressed with how my tribes stepped up after the reward fiasco a few rounds ago. It’s definitely nice not having to go to tribal, so not swapping would be best for me. I’m still tight with luke and plan on being so for the rest of the game. We’ve already talked about hooking up with the other great lakers come merge. After that, world domination!

Jay

I'm getting voted out it was fun while it lasted i guess :/

6/5

Sammy

woo okay so my tribe is doing so good and I’m so happy because if we lose immunity i know that me and heather don’t have the numbers....I’m hoping i make it to atleast jury. Alsooo i just did my maze and it went really well. Yayyyy, okay yes.

6/6

Carson

"So... is no one trying at these challenges? I'm really shocked that I'm actually dominating every single one of these. I normally do well in challenges, but I've performed better than i ever have before. Its definitely because i'm worried about my place on this tribe. Being that we havent gone to tribal yet, there aren't solidified alliances. I've also had no one start a conversation with me. The conversations I've started with people have never lead to any sort of alliance building either. It makes me believe that I could try to be blindsided because I'm the strongest in challenges and that the merge is on the horizon. I wouldn't put it past these people honestly. I know I have luke in my corner, but stoner is a huge wildcard to me, especially since he's both saved me and burned me in the past. We had a weird relationship in Alcatraz, and it makes me hesitant to trust him in this game.

Also I asked Luke the round where he got caught searching if he wanted to work together with me to find the idol. His response was yes, however nothing has transpired from it. Ive sent him my search route once, but he never reciprocated by telling me the routes he's done since he went many times before I even tried. He probably already has it honestly, which is fine, I just wish he would be honest with me about it."

Tim

Woo we won!!! I CAN RELAX

Sarah

I hate hate my tribe pt 4

Quil

So im in a good spot still, I'm literally queen of this series, but trixies tribe lost again and she's probably going home and I swear i'm going to be so pissed if i lose a jury vote rn because of that fatass tribe of rejects! (idk who is on it tbh but still!!!)

Heather

WOO Another immunity and reward. We stan the Bernard tribe. Even tho Carson basically won the flash game. King of flash games. I kinda hope another swap is happening soon but at the same time our tribe is doing fine with challenges soo hehe. 

Luke

wow hello i forgot about this omg.... we won immunity and reward again that's so amazing! Bernard tribe has been killing it but it's been boring, i need a change of scenery. i need to meet up with my friends again and kill this game and WIN i really want to fucking win oh my lord please let me win 

Madison

IT's boring af! I want to pick this shit up! Tribals have been easy! I want to be SPOOKED! Put me on a tribe with people that hate me or something I want DRAMA. 

In addition to my last confession, I'd love for someone to call me a fake feminist right about now. Do you think Sarah will since we're voting her out? 

6/7

Dan

"Literally so shocked we won. I’m not surprised I did well, but like I was so worried others wouldn’t turn it out. I thought we were getting a one way ticket to tribal, but I guess my tribe is a little more iconic than I thought.

I might actually try to talk to people today???? Idk haha I’m just so pretty and can’t be bothered"

Duncan

Like I said! Our tribe succcccs really bad!! Madison and I and ruthie get to choose which of Sarah and trixie go home. Either way is going to be pissing someone off. Hopefully we make the right decision because I feel a swap coming on

Tim

Fuck my game with this swap huh.

Aundra

"Feet don’t fail me now take me to the finish line I feel so alone on this Thursday thanks to lady O and Cam I think I need wine. ANOTHER SWAPP WHYYYY  my tribe was like the best people ever and we worked very well together now I’m with a group of people I’ve never meet which means I have to sit around and talk to them all to get to know them. This is horrible to me 1) I’m a lunatic and going crazy because I’m hella overwhelmed over the last day of school 2) I don’t really want to work with all these people and will more than likely be an outsider because I know NOBODY on this tribe 3) the only person I think I might know looks like Miranda Cosgrove and she’s allegedly super great at everything and multitalented soon to be governor of some state in America. I literally can not. IM SEPARATED FROM MY NEW GAME BFF QUILLYNN we haven’t really talked in awhile but when your tribe is safe you don’t really have to talk plus we’ve all been kinda busy but that’s besides the fact they err my ride or die along Tim IM AWAY FROM MY BFF TEEM I pretty sure Cam and Olivia hate me but you know what they say the devil can work but Normani works harder                                   Xoxo gossip goat "

Dan

Mcscuse me???? Under construction? You know my ass is Charlie Day-ing this shit searching the blog for things. I'm officially crackdt. 

6/10

Tim

Now I now more about Maine than myself. Lmao but we won woo!!

Quil

Just another day of me being the most iconic winner! Kinda sad Sarah got taken out but, at the same time its one step closer to my 3rd win!

Aundra

"So we’re voting Stoner out my favorite person on my tribe tbh i vibe with him and he’s cool the rest of these people ain’t all that and a bag a chips. I have to sit around and lie to him and say Duncan is the vote when ik that he’s the vote which makes me feel horrible because being blindsided is never fun I lowkey hope I’m getting blindsubwvaus the cast is basically full of the the people that could never and winners and the winner seem over it they’re trash in a way like come on people this is an allstar season and you sit around like your here just to be here at least act like you signed up to play and weren’t forced that’s really all I got to say so here’s to me bein a bad friend and to me possibly getting voted out!                                   Xoxo gossip goat"

Luke

"My new tribe was a disaster at first but now everybody wants a bite of this english muffin :~)

I have Dan I have Trixie I have Madison and Duncan as a threeway

Ugh my mind"

Duncan

I don’t know what’s happening. It’s been a stressful week irl and idk why I’m playing a game rn. I’m probably going home but I’ve heard stoner as the vote so that’s what I did. If I die hopefully my daughter Madison thrives 

Heather

Wooo Tim and I did that kahoot. I thought a tribe swap would mean I would lose for the tribe tbh. 

Dan

This vote seemed way too easy tbh. Did I want a comeback story arc with Stoner? I mean kinda? But like he’s also straight and it’s pride month so he gotta get the boot sis. This all could be an elaborate scheme to get me out but in all reality it’s a waste bc I’m so busy in my real life that I pay an ounce of attention to this. (To clarify I do care about this game I just had a super busy weekend full of social events and you know that this boy doesn’t ever have a social life so he had to take advantage of it!!!!)

Ruthie

"I'm SO glad that the people on my tribe are good at challenges! I hope I can do something with the next one so I can show that I'm useful and not just taking up space on the beach bahah!  

I have no idea what will happen tonight but we'll see!  I don't think that there will be another swap anytime soon. "

6/11

Heather

We most certainly do not stan this upcoming one world. No we most certainly do not.

Dan

I love rigging my random.org so Dana is safe. Gotta look out for my winners after Sarah's messy ass left haha. But seriously random.org picked her. I think Heather and Tim will be a little annoyed that I didn't pick someone from Lago, but if they ask I literally have screenshot proof that I randomized it to be fair with a time stamp so like they can calm down. And if one of them goes, oh well??? I really hope merge is next. I feel like this game is going by so quickly, I am forever thankful for that. 

Aundra

"A tribal twist that I really like but both robes are gonna to tribal I think tonight or tomorrow idk I haven’t been paying attention and am more of a mess than normal I really wish I was working with my peeps and not with these randos that are probably going to vote me out which sucks but hopefully I’ll make jury given that we get to go to tribal second it’s all about the motion of the ocean                                   Xoxo gossip goat "

6/12

Tim

Damn it I thought I had a good score in immunity but I lost :////. Congrats Carson and Dan i guess lol but comp beasts can choke (in the game that is). Dana and uhhh someone else is safe so hsbdd. Yeah so the plan is to stick with Quil, Dana, and Carson so ya!

Quil

Idk if im going home or not. Dan is dead to me for not giving me immunity!!! Ruthie better be leaving or yikes

Tim

So it looks like Ruth is dying because of this ugly twist!!! But hey atleast its not someone active.

Luke

"YES YES YES CARSON CAME THROUGH FOR ME AND HE GAVE ME IMMUNITY I'M SO FREAKING HAPPY. This just proves that the relationships I'm making in this game are working to my benefit and are keeping me safe and I could not be happier right now. This tribal council is a difficult one. I like everybody on my tribe but I said I'd work with Madison and Duncan, I said I'd work with Dan, I said I'd work with Trixie which leaves Aundra as really my only option to vote. It sucks because I like Aundra a lot but they don't really talk to me or anybody and it's getting to the point where if you don't try, you gotta go...

I'm expecting a merge after this tribal council because we'll be at 11 (I think ) which is perfect for a merge. I can meet up with Quil, Trixie and Dana, I can get back with Carson and also utilise my relationship with Madison/Duncan. I think I'm gonna make it far providing I play this game smart WOOOO O"

Sammy

ugg okay so I’m on a tribe with everyone that i like so making this decision is gonna be so hard:/ I’ve heard Ruthie tho imso im just gonna go with it....

Madison

"Me: throws immunity

Also me: feels like everyone is sketchy and that I’m probably going home this week.

Am I mad? Not particularly. "

Aundra

"Guess who’s probably going home! Me!! NOBODIES saying anything to me about a vote everyone is “lost” and i think I’m voting Trixie no need to keep dead wieght on our tribe and if these people vote me out they’re idiots complete dummy’s for keeping people that won’t work with them and can’t contribute to the tribe stupid people do stupid things                                   Xoxo gossip goat"

6/13

Tim

I MADE MERGE WOOOO

6/14

Luke

"Hello well all of the conversations about this game spicing up at merge were true because this cast is fucking CRACKEDT and I have no idea what's going on. I'm in an alliance with Duncan, Madison and Dan... Quillynn, Trixie and Dana expect me to vote with them so I'm kinda stuck between two threesomes but Dan wants to talk to me privately in a few about something and I think it's about the same thing I wanna talk to him about. It's about us being STUCK because we're expected to vote a certain. All I know is my name hasn't been brought up so that's good.

After this round, depending on which way to go I want to work with the group I don't betray, Dan and Carson. I think it'd be smart of me. I just need to talk with Dan before we decide what's going on. Will keep you posted. "

Duncan

I might go home because Tim has the fattest mouth on the block. I was hoping for some black guy magic but I just don’t think it’s in the cards. I think one of us will go home and do I know why he chooses the karringtons over the rest of us? No. Also I haven’t really done shit strategically this game and have barely been around socially idk how I’m stil here. Over jay Sarah stoner and aundra? I don’t know how he does it. Maybe if I do nothing in every game I’ll be guaranteed merge. I just don’t get why people are coming after me. You’re not going to like hearing it but sometimes I forget I’m in this game. I’m just now getting my feet game wise but apparently I can’t go in the kiddy look without enduring a shark attack 

Dan

Honestly I’m really happy that my name wasn’t thrown around this vote it’s a hot ass mess and I’m aligned with too many people

Heather

"This round is a mess. Heres what happened Madison wanted Isle of Skye Alliance Her me and Tim make said alliance I get busy and cant message and only do 12 stones for immunity thinking imma lose I win cuz everyones dead Quil wants to gun for Duncan Madison and I wanna gun for Quil Tim does what he always does in games and snakes Quil confronts me I lie I tell Duncan we should gun for Tim NO ONE IS TELLING ME WHO THEY VOTING WJDJSHD"

Carson

God this round was kind of a hot mess for me. So my main concern going into the merge is not being a target. I knew coming into the merge people would see me as a threat based on my performance in challenges. So my first order of business was to throw the immunity challenge since I would still be among other challenge threats (luke and dan) if I don’t win. Next, I made sure I was still good with my alliance of quil, Dana, and Tim. Unfortunately, I don’t think it’s best for me to continue with that alliance. So I went ahead and made a side alliance with Duncan. I view him as a HUGE threat to win, but i feel better going to the end with him knowing I can beat him in immunity challenges. My old alliance is full of wildcards. So at this point, I’m pretty much aligned with everyone, which is both terrifying and exciting. I have been on tribes with Sammy and heather for the past few rounds. Luke and I are super close. I have a new alliance with Duncan that was formed to redeem ourselves from Alcatraz. Dan and Madison are allies of Luke and Duncan respectively, so I need to work on my social connection with them bc jury management. I’m starting to see a path to the finals, but more on that next round. I need to go run errands!!

Madison

Do I lowkey hope they flipped the vote on me and I go? yes. at least then someone will have made a move!!

6/15

Sammy

okay so so so I’m at camp and i feel like I’m missin so much stuff happening in the game. But I’m with quill and Dana....however Carson and Duncan want to work with me. BUT Duncan and Quill are against each other-_- why does this always happen to me.....

6/16

Duncan

I think it’s bananas that Tim went home. Well, not really, he broke peoples trust within the first round of merge. You can’t do that. I feel like no one is really playing the game rn besides like Madison and I love her but if I still have a shot to win, even though I’ve done retroactively nothing in this game, I’m still going to go for the W. So if I don’t go home tonight, expect me to start my cocaine drug abuse problem that I had in Alcatraz. Last time I was here for Mitch, this time im here for me. So once I start being active, it’s all over

Madison

"OKAY TEA. Trixie is literally voting however I’m voting bc she’s gonna be gone I’m CACKLING I LITERALLY HAVE A DOUBLE VOTE! WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE!!!

Idk who I want gone. If I go that’s cute too like it’s jury who cares but this is hilarious. Idols make me a little nervy but idk. "

Dan

"I'm so yikes over this vote rn. Like I knew I was aligning myself all over the place, but I wasn't expecting to have to pick a side. Quil basically confirmed today to Luke that votes would be public tonight, which makes this even worse bc I have to own my shit. I'm hoping that Madison doesn't freak the fuck out when she realizes she is really on the bottom. This is what she gets for Mongolia tbh. I turned over a new leaf with her for Lago and now it's my turn to snake. I'm gonna tell her Duncan is going at like 9:50 tonight if she has some advantage or something cute to save him, but like I just also feel like shit???

I don't especially trust Quil, but I need her in front of me bc she'll always be a bigger threat. I know I need to flip on her eventually, but with Quil gone, the drama is gone, the target is gone, and I'm a sitting duck.

Also peep the white gays killing all the POCs, I'm literally disgusted. "

Madison

WHEW okay so I knew the vote was going to flip obviously I’m not an idiot. so this is either going to work and make it seem like I’m on the bottom OR it’s gonna make them all flip and vote me out next round and that works too so. woohoo

6/17

Olivia

Dan searched the trails and found 1/3 idol. Luke searched at practically the same time but like with a 30 second delay. Both went down the EXACT same path. Luke lost the idol by like 20 seconds it was wild. 

6/20

Dan

"I just scrolled 8 miles through the chat to find this yikes.

Honestly like if I go home this round it’s cool and whatever but I just feel like I’m great spot??? Luke showing his cards last week put the target on his back. Of fucking course he had to win immunity bc I didn’t have time to play Casanova, but like I feel like Sammy can go. I’m in 2 strong groups of three and Dana is my number one. I’m just proud I’m getting at least 7th in an all stars season where I’m coming in as a winner. "

6/21

Dan

"Wow so uh I got played huh. That’s what I get for being confident, thanks Demi!!! I just wish that someone clued me in on the Quillynn vote. Like yes I had been working with her, yes she was a big threat, but yes I would have gladly voted her ass out. She would have easily won if she got to the end just bc she’s a 2 time winner.

I did message Heather and Luke and said I would have gone along with the plan if I had known about it so hopefully they believe me bc that’s the honest truth. I really need to do some damage control with Sammy as well. The only reason I voted him was because no one gave me another alternative. I’m definitely not gonna win this game ugh. But again I’m happy that I made at least top 6 in an all stars game coming in as a winner. "

6/24

Dan

"Oh hey it’s me, Lago Dan, here to make an immunity run bc like I feel like I would have been next. I wouldn’t be surprised at all of Dana/Trixie/Luke team up against me and Sammy but also I really want to hope that Luke and Dana will go with the winners to the end mentality. I just realistically don’t see a winner winning if it’s not 3 winners at the end. The jury is fucking bitter bc it’s an all stars season and their entitled asses are just gonna have to get over it.

Realistically I don’t see me having many big moves on my resume besides the Heather vote last round. I think Heather needed to go because she really called the shots at the live Tribal with her vote and she’s someone that is likebale to the jury. This game I tried to get all the lago people out because none of them want me at the end again. The next to go in theory is sammy but I think I might try to give Trixie the boot tbh. Sammy is someone who could win final immunity, but let’s be real the kid lives at camp rn or some shit so maybe he won’t even show up again.

I really wanted to try to have a game with a bit more complexity than my first game but I think I ended up playing pretty similarly. This time I tried to hold off before winning comps and now look at me I’m slaying. But socially I think I faultered a few times in this game and I’m ready to face that bitter af jury"

6/27

Dan

This could very well be my last night in the game and it's super bittersweet. I hate that it's coming down to this fricken comp. I can't figure some things out because some things never got posted on the blog.... *EYES CAMERON AND OLIVIA FROM ACROSS THE ROOM* but anywho, Dana isn't giving me a straight answer about what's going on with everything and I just wanna die. Like Sammy told me he didn't do the comp, which is cool and will self vote to force the tie and then throw fire making, so like now that this confessional has taken a turn for the better I think I'm good (: hehehehehehheehhehehehee. I love being a two time winner (hopefully)