#you know the brainrot is bad when you make a whole playlist

[sketchingwithlyn]

Welp,... The Trigun brainrot has gotten so bad that I made a Vashwood inspired playlist... 😳

You're welcome to listen if you want...

Original art by sodavicc

[agustdiv1ne]

telepathy (m) — cbg

pairing: choi beomgyu x fem!reader

genre: smut, strangers to ???, mind reader/telepathist!beomgyu, funeral home employee!beomgyu (it's for the plot ok???)

wc: 11.7k

synopsis: most people would abhor a packed subway car — but beomgyu, telepathist extraordinaire, relishes in it. with a career in the funeral business, he finds his morning commute to be the only thing that keeps him relatively sane. reading the mundane thoughts of mundane people maintains his tether to his humanity, but when he goes to read your mind...oh, things get a whole lot more interesting.

warnings: mdni!! 18+ only, ageless blogs dni!!!, mentions of dead bodies, embalming, and funerals (though not very descriptive — it's only bc of gyu's profession), reader is a freak that listens to nsfw audios on her way to work!, gyu is a perv so it's a match made in heaven (hell?), gyu's honestly a little strange + obsessive in this...anyways, dom!gyu, sub!mc, solo male masturbation, on my big cock beomgyu agenda, very brief mentions of daddy/sir/master kinks, explicit consent is given before anything happens bc consent is sexy <3, mind manipulation (he makes it feel like he's touching her), exhibitionism in a way (it will all make sense, trust 🙏), degradation, praise, pseudo-fingering (idk how to explain it, f receiving), gyu calls mc: pretty girl, sweetheart, slut, whore, princess, mc calls gyu sir like once...whew! that was a lot, lmk if i should add anything!

note: you know i have a terrible bout of brainrot when the warnings are all nsfw related...yeah. Yeah. *presses post and runs away*

☆ playlist ☆

masterlist

beomgyu’s commute to work is, by all means, uneventful. 

the train is packed as per usual, filled to the brim with businessmen and office workers and other miscellaneous passengers on their way to whatever the hell their destination is. like most days, he finds himself towards the middle of the passenger car, snatching a rare open seat between a stone-faced man adorned in a suit — his head buried in a newspaper — and a slumped over college student nursing a cup of coffee. the poor kid almost looks like death itself, sporting dark under eyes, rumpled clothes, and a prominent slouch to his spine. not that beomgyu could really blame him; he remembers how easily college living (if you could call it living) can chip away at a person’s mental well-being. 

people-watching like this is what keeps him sane, he thinks. being surrounded by corpses all day, every day is more than draining — it sucks the soul out of him, really, being the only person on shift most of the time that he’s working, having to embalm and clean and pretty up all those cold, gray bodies so that their loved ones can say one last goodbye. it’s quiet in their minds and it’s all too quiet in the funeral home, the only sounds being the clanking of the embalming tools he’s been trained to use, his footsteps echoing down the tiled halls, his sighs of contempt when something small goes wrong — yet the living, breathing, warm people on the train provide a sense of normalcy, something to look forward to every day. to hear their thoughts, as prosaic as they are, has become a sort of saving grace from the lifeless, cold building that he finds himself in five out of the seven days of the week. honestly, if he can maintain a little bit of his humanity via strangers among the subway, even if it’s just by hearing their thoughts, then he’ll take what he can get. 

yeah, that’s the thing: beomgyu is a mind-reader, a pretty talented one at that. not that anyone knew, of course — he wouldn’t risk the government finding out. beomgyu is not usually one for promises, but he has promised himself one thing: there’s no way in hell that he will ever become one of the government’s sick little science experiments, even if his life ever hits rock bottom. he has no idea how his powers work — just that they do, and he would like to keep it that way. it’s bad enough that he doesn’t know where he got such abilities; his parents never mentioned anything about it and only ever grew worried whenever he read back their thoughts to them, so obviously the existence of his powers is some statistical anomaly in the universe. normal people can’t read others’ minds. he was forced to learn that at a very young age in order to keep himself safe. 

“how do you know that?” he remembers his mother’s alarmed tone when he first did it unknowingly, repeating back her own thoughts to her without realizing that’s what he had done. he was maybe six at the time — innocent, curious, plagued by voices in his head that he didn’t quite understand. those voices weren’t his. rather, they were his friends’, his family’s, his dentist’s and his doctor’s and his soccer coach’s voices that ricocheted about his mind uncontrollably;it was overwhelming for the young boy’s mind. the day he first admitted that he could hear them was the first day he heard his parents argue, their yelling from downstairs colliding with their internal voices in beomgyu’s mind, their terribly poignant concern for him and this development louder than any of the venomous words that they spat at each other in the living room. all he remembers from that day was himself crying, unable to block out anything that they thought, let alone his own thoughts. too much for his young mind to handle.

he heard their fear when they took him to the doctor for the first time of many, their heartache when the doctor came back and said that he might have psychosis, but more testing was needed. he heard how they started to deny it — their little boy couldn’t have that, could he? no, no he couldn’t. there’s no way he could. 

although beomgyu was young at the time, guilt ate at him. he was the one hurting his parents, he was the one making them worry. despite his official diagnosis when he was seven, something inside him knew that the doctors were wrong. those voices weren’t just the result of the machinations of his mind at work — they were voices of the people he knew, strangers who passed him on the street. what they said wasn’t evil, it wasn’t out of the ordinary. usually, it was quite mundane. at some point, he started to practice with it, trying focus on one certain voice out of the buzzing hive in his mind, blocking out the others, switching and focusing and blocking out until the action was as natural as breathing. it took him about five years before he reached that point, and after nearly two decades of living with his abilities, he’s gotten quite used to it. his mind is usually quiet — besides his own stream of consciousness — unless he allows others in. or, rather, they allow him in, which they always do. he sees it like a set of doors; open one, and you can hear that one person’s thoughts. close it, and he no longer hears them. and none of them are ever locked since no one expects to their thoughts to be read, which simply makes his life that much easier.

if he’s being honest, he didn’t used to read minds as often as he does now, but there isn’t much he can do about that now lest he go insane. beomgyu could admit that his habit was a little creepy…okay scratch that, extremely fucking creepy. these people had no idea that their minds were being infiltrated, their mental walls bypassed and their privacy violated like a computer infected with a malicious virus. it’s borderline depraved, how nonchalantly he robs these strangers of their utmost privacy, sometimes of their deepest, darkest secrets that they would never want anyone to find out about. he could sequester quite a bit of money out of some of these people, now that he thinks about it.

and sure, that may sound immoral, but beomgyu has never considered himself to be of particularly virtuous character.

without a second thought, beomgyu taps into the mind of the kid next to him. he’s thinking about how he’s failing his statistics class because he just bombed his midterm. no, now his mind is full of what he’s going to eat after his 8 a.m. class. he shifts his focus on the businessman to his right. stocks, his cheating wife, how he’s considering leaving with his mistress in the coming days…

”what a prick,” beomgyu thinks to himself, smirking a bit. just a few more stops until he gets off, now. 

he pulls his phone from his jacket pocket, scrolling aimlessly just to keep his eyes busy. sitting on the opposite side of the college student, an elderly lady walks herself through the stew that she’s going to make for her grandchildren tonight, excitement coloring her words. it’s cute — he loves hearing things like that. wholesome thoughts are not easy to come by nowadays, given the state of the world. exhibit a: a teenager standing on the other side of the train car worries himself into a frenzy over whether the girl that he has a crush on likes him back. exhibit b: a middle aged man contemplates if he should quit his job. for a second, beomgyu thinks that he might be in the same boat as him, before realizing that he has nothing else to fall back on — exhibit c. he could keep going.

a clear, robotic voice overhead announces the subway’s arrival to the next station — his station. sighing, he sits up a little taller, slipping his phone into the pocket of his slacks. a vague sense of dread weighs down his shoulders, knowing that he has a service to set up for the moment he clocks in.

he’s not looking forward to today, and yet the train still slows to a stop, the doors still slide open, and he still grabs his work briefcase from the spot between his feet. like clockwork, beomgyu maneuvers through the crowd, out the doors, and climbs the stairs up to the chilly streets of seoul.

decompressing after a slow-moving shift can take beomgyu’s night in many directions. sometimes, he simply returns home and hops into bed after a long, scalding hot shower that removes the invisible layer of grime that lays heavy on his skin. other times — typically on fridays — he’ll stop by a bar and catch up with his friends, occasionally leaving with a woman hanging off of his arm if he drinks enough to lower his inhibitions. more often than not, however, his excursions at the underground bar that taehyun is partial to end in him stumbling home alone and waking up the next morning with a raging headache. nursing a hangover alone, eating breakfast alone, bathing alone…he has never really become acclimated to it. the monster that festers inside beomgyu’s chest craves for love, for connection, for somebody to hold when the nights are too dark and his thoughts match the shade of the sky. the lack of connection is slowly getting to him. is this what insanity feels like? he wouldn’t know, nor would he like to find out. he’s sane. he’s perfectly sane. 

beomgyu understands that his profession can be off-putting to potential lovers, but it’s not as if he had much of a choice in the matter — not when his one shot at the career of his dreams crumbled below his feet when the company filed bankruptcy, sending him tumbling back down to earth, to the reality that his college degree meant little to nothing to the vast majority of employers nowadays. though he applied to dozens of jobs, the only one he ever heard back from was from the listing titled “mortuary assistant,” and in desperation, he accepted the position without much thought. maybe if he had tried a little harder to find a different company where he could apply his skills, maybe if he had pushed himself to make connections in the industry when he had the resources to do so, maybe if he had pursued music production a little harder, had not given up so readily when things grew difficult…maybe things would be different. 

beomgyu often thinks about the maybes.

this particular night, he finds himself leaned over a bar counter, a glass of amber-hued beer in hand. he half-listens to yeonjun’s slurred account of his dance crew’s latest win while he stares down at the mahogany tabletop. some condensation has gathered on the wood, and he swipes a finger through it. a slap to his shoulder brings his focus back to his surroundings.

“gyu, dude, y’should totally try out,’’ yeonjun pitches as he sloppily swings an arm over beomgyu’s shoulders. “get out of that. that—” he stumbles over his words for a moment, expression warping into a confused grimace. “that gross ass dead people building.”

beomgyu exhales a laugh as yeonjun’s head lolls against his shoulder, quietly whining about how his head hurts. while yeonjun is substantially gone already, beomgyu is only on his second beer. scanning the spacious, dim-lit room, he shakes his head. it’s times like these where he does not feel the need to slip into people’s minds — being surrounded by his friends is enough. “nah, man. i don’t think i could keep up. it’s been a while.”

“sure y’could! you’re like th’second best dancer here!” yeonjun says as his torso slumps down against the table. the bartender eyes him from further down the bar top with concern, but beomgyu sates the employee with an apologetic smile, ensuring that he turns away before setting his attention back on his friend.

beomgyu scoffs. “and i’m assuming you’re the first best?”

“uh, obviously. i literally run th’thing,” yeonjun retorts as he glares at him with a single eye open, an ear now resting on top of his crossed arms on the counter.

“yeonjun’s right,” taehyun butts in from the other side of yeonjun’s collapsed body. though his glazed over eyes give away his inebriated state, taehyun’s tolerance tends to lean much higher than yeonjun’s; this fact is confirmed by the crystal clear enunciation of his words as he continues, “you’ve been acting differently ever since you started working there. it wouldn’t hurt to try something new.”

great, even his friends have noticed. exhaling deeply, beomgyu nods.

“yeah, i’ll think about it.” 

as the conversation meanders off into other topics, beomgyu sinks back into his own little world. curse taehyun and his acute perceptiveness. he knows that he’s been acting off, but maybe his friends are right; he once dreamed of being a choreographer, back when he was a teen, before he discovered his love for music production. perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad to try.

unintentionally, he meets the gaze of a girl sitting at a booth with her friends. he quickly averts his gaze, and by the time he looks back up, she has been roped into what seems like a shot-taking contest. six other girls circle the table, one joining the first girl in taking rapid-fire shots, four others egging them on, and one laser-focused on her phone, occasionally sipping water through a straw. from what he can gather, she’s likely the group’s designated driver — though it seems her role has morphed into more of a babysitter. she’s pretty, he’ll admit. just his type. if he was on his third or fourth beer, he’d probably be over there trying to strike up a conversation with her, rather than any of her drunk friends. 

as she looks up and throws a cursory glance around the bar, she catches him staring, her kohl-lined eyes meeting his own. an eyebrow raises as her gloss-coated lips twist, as if to say “don’t even try it.”

oh, how terribly he wishes to slip into her mind and let her know that he has no intention to. 

the ear-piercing screech of yeonjun’s barstool to his right tears his gaze away from her. yeonjun now stands, one arm around taehyun and the other around soobin, the latter sporting a borderline disgusted grimace directed at the older boy hanging off of him while kai simply stands behind the trio of men. yeonjun’s head hangs low below his shoulders, chin nearly touching his chest, as he emits a pathetic groan. at least he’s not puking this time.

“we’re about to go grab some food. this one,” taehyun’s head nods to yeonjun’s sagging frame. “definitely needs it. you coming?”

unwilling to allow the night to end quite yet, beomgyu hums, quickly pays his tab, and allows the brief, silent encounter with the woman to fade away into the back of his mind.

the rest of the weekend passes without fanfare, and monday returns to rear its ugly head once again. monday is beomgyu’s least favorite day of the week; it brings a raging headache from his 5 a.m. alarm, a bone-deep fatigue that lingers for the rest of the day. it brings grumpy commuters whose knees and elbows uncomfortably bump against his own. it brings people who think that he should give up his seat, and silently tell him so with narrowed eyes and furrowed eyebrows. how selfish, they all think whenever he actually bothers to read their thoughts. what a fucking dick, some of them even snarl within the so-called impenetrable walls of their minds, walls he so easily breaks down. he levels those ones with a half-awake glare, pupils gloomy and lifeless. internally, their uneasy reactions make him want to laugh, hysterically cackle in their faces because wow, is he really that scary? he shouldn’t be, but maybe the dark under eyes are doing something for him.

surprisingly, the subway car he frequents is less crowded than usual. not as many people stand in front of him, and he’s actually able to see directly across the car for the first time in a while. doors shut, and he’s left to look around at the regulars and the new patrons that often don’t show up again. they’re easily less interesting than the regulars. really, what can he say? the daily life updates satisfy his nosy tendencies. 

still, he hates mondays. mondays suck. mondays make him want to crawl into a hole and eventually join the bodies at his workplace. they bring out the worst in his mind. all they do is remind him of the neverending cycle that he has trapped himself in — wake up, work, go to sleep, and do it all over again the next day.

mondays bring a lot of things he fundamentally dislikes, but this particular monday also brings you. 

it’s split-second eye contact. nothing more, nothing less. your eyes grow wide, your lips parting just the slightest bit in surprise. though he has not invaded your mind (yet), he can already tell what you are thinking. fuck, he isn’t blind — he knows that he is handsome.

your eyes shoot downward, your head hanging low with your phone clenched between your fingers. one of his eyebrows raises while a small smirk plays on his lips — you’re new, and even better, you’re cute. his dark, seemingly bored gaze trails over to the earbuds nestled in your ears, then to your crossed legs. you glance up at him again, eyes blowing wide again as your thighs press together just enough for him to notice the movement. his own eyes narrow slightly, evaluating the sight. 

you seem...interesting. prim, proper, sitting in a modest-length skirt and a plain blouse and coat that paint you as an unassuming character, just another random person in this sardine can of a train car. yet there’s this glint in your eyes that tells him there is so, so much more to you than what meets the eye — that the innocent, put-together little front that you display to the world is a complete and utter lie. it’s intriguing. new patrons come and go from this particular subway car every day, but you and your fresh face have caught his interest — and so has your odd behavior. 

then, without warning, realization punches him square in the gut.

you were there the other night, with those girls at the bar. the one sitting at the end of the table with the small glass of water as you scrolled through your phone. the one who shot a piercing glare at him as you looked out for your inebriated friends. your current behavior is a far cry from the strong front he first encountered that night, small and oh-so meek and lacking the sharp, piercing edge to your gaze that initially piqued his interest in you. the change, for some reason, intrigues him more. what happened to that feisty glare, that confident air to your posture? he wants to know why you seem so meek, so he taps in to your mind and—

“you’re my dumb little slut, aren’t you? fuckin’ say it—”

beomgyu flinches in his seat, the door to your mind slamming shut as he sits there in shock. did he really just hear that? are you listening to fucking porn on the subway? what the fuck?

he’s never had this happen to him before. he’s accidentally stumbled upon the occasional horny thought before, sure, but listening to porn on the subway? that’s a new one. he decides to give you another glance; your lips are pressed together now, eyes pointed towards the floor as you further shrink into yourself. fuck, you’re so cute, but now he knows you’re also awfully perverted — and for some reason, he feels himself getting hard in his trousers at the thought of entering your mind again. 

he should do something about this little development, shouldn’t he?

yeah, he thinks that he should. a sick sort of curiosity wins over the more logical side of his brain, the side that tells him that he should feel guilty for even thinking about what he’s about to do. he can’t, can he? no, he can — he wants to, he really fucking wants to. opportunities like this don’t just present themselves on a silver platter like this on the regular. if he doesn’t take this chance, then he’d be an absolute fool. 

the subway slows to a stop, the weirdly cheery, robotic voice calling out another stop. not his, thank god. he takes this opportunity to open that pesky little door to your mind again, now fully expecting the depravity echoing in your brain — and rather than do anything drastic too quickly, he simply sits there and listens. he listens through an entire audio alongside you, ignoring the twitch of his cock as he listens to the woman be degraded and praised, in missionary and in doggy, her moans mixing with the man's in a cacophony of pleasure — he loves the way you jump when the sound of a hand striking flesh sounds through your mind. your fleeting sigh of “god, i wish that were me,” causes him to bite his lip. you like being treated like a slut, huh? like a stupid little whore only made to take cock? that’s music to his ears, really — because he likes treating girls like that too. 

as sick and disgusting as it is, he continues to listen as if mindlessly tuning in to a podcast, subtly adjusting himself in his pants as he fights off a raging boner. he wants to be the one to do those things to you. he wants to make you scream and sob and beg for mercy as he completely ravages your body, fuck you until you’re brainless, perfect little slut for him. you’d love that, according to the audios you consume for the remainder of his commute — to be fucked so hard you legs give out from under you, to be owned, fully and completely. he likes that sound of that as well.

a few minutes into the second audio, you take another glance at him, eyes squeezing shut right away once you catch his gaze — and suddenly, your thoughts are full of him. he’s encountered countless strangers who can perfectly visualize their streams of consciousness, and you seem to be yet another one of them. images of you on your knees between his thighs and sucking his cock in the middle of this subway car flood his own mind, switching to one of him fucking you from behind against the wall while everyone else watches, then to him finger fucking you with a hand around your throat…what the fuck. what the fuck? how do you just do that? how do you think of such terribly shameless things while looking so pretty and demure, as if you’re a shy little thing rather than some fucking whore? he shifts his briefcase over his lap again. fuck, he’s so hard it’s starting to hurt. shit, fuck. 

he should be appalled by you, but fiery, ardent lust is the sole emotion that floods his veins. would it be a bad idea to talk to you? no, you want it. you want it so fucking bad. just look at your mind — and he can make all your dirty little fantasies come true, if you would let him. 

just as he’s about to actually do something about you, the subway slows to a stop once again, the same cheery voice announcing his stop. god dammit. pushing himself up to his feet, he finds that you’re doing the same, wide eyes flitting around nervously as you move towards the door and stop nearly right next to him, those earbuds that hide your biggest secret in plain sight still stuck in your ears. he can still hear those degrading words and moans and slapping sounds that still echo through your mind, loud and clear as if those white earbuds are sitting snug in his own ears. 

the doors slide open, and soon enough, he loses sight of you in the surging crowd. stepping out of the subway, he looks around once, twice. you have completely disappeared; nowhere to be found, your mind has grown too far from his own for him to locate nor access, the tether between the two of you frayed to the point of snapping in half. with a brief purse of his lips, he sets off up the stairs. it’s fine, there’s always another day. it’s fine, he tells himself over and over again. there’s nothing he could have done in such a short time, anyway. 

the sun sits high in the sky today, but the bone-chilling air cuts through his puffy coat like tiny needles puncturing his skin, or millions of scalpels slicing open flesh nearly to the bone, cold and sterile and far from comforting. autumn shouldn’t be this cold, and his slightly soured mood isn’t helping his case right now. he should have done something back there, he should’ve opened up the channel between the two of you and taken the plunge. it wouldn’t have hurt to try, but no. no, he let that opportunity go like every other one he’s had in his life. with his jaw set, he promises himself that it won’t happen again. it won’t, because if he keeps living like this — allowing all these opportunities slip through his fingers like grains of sand — he’ll never be able to forgive himself.

and honestly, beomgyu is no clairvoyant, and he should brush off the tickle in his brain as a stupid, naive hunch…but he has a compelling feeling that he’ll be seeing you again tomorrow. 

when beomgyu returns home, the sun slowly sinking towards the horizon, he doesn’t unwind like he usually does. today’s shift was a slow one, with no bodies to preen and primp and no services to set up for, so most of his time was taken up with cleaning, filing documents, and sitting around aimlessly. no matter how much he tried to fend them off, thoughts of you bounced around in his brain for the entire eight hours he was on shift. fuck, he doesn’t even know your name, much less anything else about you, yet he wishes he could travel back in time and redo this morning all over again. he’s not sure how it would have panned out, exactly, but he has a few tricks up his sleeve that would’ve made it exciting.

he shakes his head. the current moment presents much more pressing matters than ruminating on this morning’s terrible decisions; the strain in his trousers proves to be a pertinent issue, a tent formed in the black fabric and aching to be touched. now that the public eye no longer holds his gaze, his apartment door locked shut behind him, he allows himself to give in to his most base instincts. a hand comes down to cup his hardness as he imagines his fingers as yours, you on your knees below him, those adorably wide eyes staring up at him in desperation. you’d wait for permission, right? you’d beg so prettily like a good little slut should? fuck yeah, you would. you’d be good, you’d take what he would give you — and you would love it. 

groaning, he crashes onto his couch, head throwing back against the back cushion as he gropes his cock harder. he’s forgone slipping off his dress shoes and has barely even slipped his coat off before he’s giving in to the pulsing ache in his groin that’s nearly unbearable, the white hot need swirling in his stomach that demands his immediate attention. his belt quickly unbuckled and his trousers pulled halfway down his thighs, he slips his cock from his boxers, gasping at how sensitive he has become. 

“oh fuck,” he breathes out into the quiet air, a shuddered sigh following when his thumb swipes over the angry red head, the bead of precum that has gathered there spreading across his skin. he brings his hand up to his lips, gathering some spit beneath his tongue before letting in loll into his palm. bringing it back down, he drags his hand up and down his shaft, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as pleasure rushes through his veins. he pumps his cock steadily, hips rolling up into his hand as if fucking your throat. eyes fluttering closed, his free hand grips the couch, fingernails digging into the worn leather and leaving half-moon indents in their wake. “fuck. god, fuck.”

would you be able to take him? he’s been told he’s big, most women barely able to take him even after extensive prep. he imagines how you’d keen as he enters you, your back arching so prettily and your walls stretching to their limits to accommodate his size. how you’d choke and gag on his cock if he decided to use your throat, tears streaming down your cheeks as you peer up at him pathetically, fingers digging into your thighs as you resist the urge to touch yourself. would you like to be slapped around a little, punished with spankings and little taps to your cheek? 

“focus,” he mumbles to no one. to you. “focus, slut. be good for me.” 

he’s delirious at this point, has dived so deep into his fantasies that he barely registers that he’s fucking his fist and not your mouth or sweet little cunt. that doesn’t stop his fingers from tightening their grip, squeezing the head before gliding back down again, then back up, the rhythm of his hips growing frenzied as his high inches closer. his free hand smooths up his stomach, taking his button-up with it as he clenches it with desperate fingers. he bites down on the fabric, pumping himself once, twice, three times before his high hits him, his cum spurting out in staccato ribbons. he’s making a mess, but he can’t bring himself to care when this is the best orgasm he’s had in months. the shirt falls from his mouth as he moans unabashedly. 

“take it,” he groans, his hips canting upward. “fuckin’— fuckin’ take it. shit. such a perfect little whore for me.”

he cums and he cums, spilling all over himself until he’s milked dry. eyes closed, his contracted muscles melt into the couch, hot pants replacing his moans and groans. a few minutes pass before he fully comes down from his headspace and returns back to earth, only for him to realize just how much he came, staining his clothes and coating his skin in creamy white. he blinks. 

reality crashes down on his head. 

he just…jerked off to you. he just came so hard he saw stars just from the mere thought of you. oh, he’s in deeper than he first thought. too deep, too quickly, he can barely breathe. 

“fuck,” beomgyu murmurs as he stares down at his cum-covered abdomen, his sticky hand. “fuck.”

beomgyu was right: you do come back the next day. and the next. and the next.

over the remainder of the work week, he watches you — well, more so listens to you, but he can’t deny himself the little glimpses he allows himself to take, drinking in how you worry your bottom lip, how the muscles in your throat contract each time you gulp. the poker face that you don crumbles oh so easily whenever he meets your stray gaze. it’s exhilarating, knowing the power he, a complete stranger, has over you. your microscopic slips in expression remain undetected to the rest of the passengers, but he sees every single one. they’re a perfectly entertaining backdrop for your explicit musings. 

he knows he could approach you like a normal human being would, but where’s the fun in that? he’s not quite a normal person in his own right, anyway. instead, he’s decided to keep you in his sights, learning what exactly you enjoy, what you like to hear, preparing for the day where he again gathers the courage to toy with you within the walls of your mind. he’s in deep, and at this point, he’s accepted it if only to justify his sadistic obsession with you. actually, on second thought, he wouldn’t quite call it an obsession, perhaps a morbid curiosity more than anything. yeah, that’s all it can be.

it’s almost as if the universe has sent him a little present in the form of you, an apology for the trials and tribulations that whatever is above has rained down on him this past year or so. of course he’s going to savor it. who wouldn’t? so he sticks to his plan, and keeps watching you, listening to you, observing you, identifying your little quirks and deepest, darkest desires. they’ll be quite useful later, he’s sure. 

over his…research period, he’s found out a lot about you. you like to be bullied, to be called a slut, a whore, but you also enjoy a little praise mixed in: good slut, good whore, pretty girl is so obedient for sir, for daddy, for master. you’re also not too picky in what you listen to, as long as it contains a male dominant in some capacity. couple’s content, threesomes, gangbangs are all on the table, as are solo audios that usually have some sort of plot to them — coworkers to lovers' first date that ends in sex? check. hot librarian who fucks over a table you after closing? that too. he could go on about what he’s heard in just the solo audios you consume, but even that list would be exhaustive. 

by the time friday rolls around, he doesn’t even have to try to search for your mind; call him crazy, but it’s almost as if you, on some subconscious level, know that he wants in and are more than willing to let him. as if you keep the door cracked open just for him. 

at least, he likes to think that you do. 

staying close, but not too close, to you proves to be difficult today. fridays bring with them a surge of new faces that crowd the subway car, which is generally quite annoying, but at the moment, he also finds it to be frustrating. no seats are open when he boards, he can’t even see you through the dense crowd, but you’re there. your mind is there, open and waiting for him to enter.

though he won’t be able to see your cute little reactions, he steps through that mental threshold. 

“it’s okay, baby. shh, don’t cry, you can cum. cum for me, just let go,” a gentle voice coos. aw, you must be having a rough morning, how sad. the only other day you listened to these kinds of audios, you looked absolutely miserable, the corners of your lips pulled down and a deep, pathetic furrow to your brows — it was wednesday, that’s right. two days ago, when you seemed frazzled and completely out of it. a little digging resulted in him learning that you had spilled your coffee all over the concrete on the way here, you thought your hair didn’t look right (even though, to him, it did, it looked perfect — he wished he could’ve told you that), and worst of all, your boss emailed you late the previous night to admonish you for your performance, demanding a meeting first thing that morning. 

still, he wishes he could take care of your boss, eliminate that weight off of your shoulders. if it were up to him, your boss would be sitting in the morgue at his place of work, gray and comatose and unable to admonish you for things that beomgyu is sure you had no control over. because that’s how offices work, right? sink or swim, big fish eat the little ones, blaming those below them for everything they should be taking responsibility for. your boss has to be one of those. he was pig-nosed and donning a constant sneer when you pictured the verbal berating you’d be getting once you got to your workplace. 

that day, he found himself thinking about how he’s become pretty talented with a scalpel. 

“good girl. doing so well for me, pretty girl,” the same voice soothes, soft cries and sniffles from the submissive mixing with the gentle words. he could treat you all sweet too. he could be anything you want, if only you knew him. 

he wants you to know him — needs you to, really.

there’s no clear cut reason for your current sour mood, your thoughts too jumbled together for him to properly decipher. are you picking apart your appearance? did you wake up late? is this all because of your boss again? he might just kill the bastard if that’s the case…if only he could approach you, tell you that everything will be okay, but he doesn’t want to knock down the house of cards he’s spent such precious time building over the course of the week. you’re too special for that. it’s the very reason why he tries to blend into the crowd, why he tries to keep eye contact to a minimum. the last thing he needs is for you to run away from him when you’re one of the only things holding him together.

when the car slows to his and your stop, disappointment nips at the space between his eyebrows. he didn’t even get to see you today, and the end of the work week means that he won’t be seeing you for two entire days. sighing, he falls into his typical routine: move towards the doors, wait for them to open, and follow the other exiting passengers out. where could you be? you’re still here, he knows that much since he’s still connected to you, still hears those soft words and moans, but where the fuck are you? you, as in your body. that you.

with a single cursory glance around, he swears he catches a glimpse of your figure before the crowd swallows you whole. as he’s shoved towards the stairs by the crowd, his chest grows heavy.

friday has just begun, but monday couldn’t come any faster. 

“so, are you gonna try out?”

yeonjun is far more sober compared to last friday night, his eyes lacking that fatigued droop they always get whenever he’s had too much. beomgyu tears his glazed-over gaze away from the television screen to look at the yeonjun, sinking further into the couch below him. he points to himself. “me?”

yeonjun rolls his eyes, a knee swinging over the arm of the armchair he sits in. “who the fuck else would i be talking to?”

scoffing, beomgyu shoots him a glare. “i don’t know, man. y’don’t have to be a dick about it.”

the open bottle of beer in beomgyu’s hand chills his fingertips, so he switches it to his other hand before taking another sip. meanwhile, soobin plops down next to him with an already open bag of chips, offering some to him. he shakes his head, and soobin shrugs, beginning to munch on them by himself. 

“i’m serious though,” yeonjun continues. “you should really try out. there’s not much to it, just dance to one song and you’re done. i’d probably pass you even if you sucked.”

“that’s nepotism,” taehyun chimes in from the floor, eyes trained on the screen as he shoots a player down in the game him and kai are currently obsessed with. the sound of gunfire fills the living room of soobin and yeonjun’s apartment, the murmurs of the two boys a low drone beneath it as they figure out their best strategy to win. 

he almost wishes he lived here with soobin and yeonjun, or with the other two. yeonjun and soobin, taehyun and kai — only beomgyu lives alone. alone doesn’t necessarily mean lonely, but in beomgyu’s case, it does. maybe that’s why he’s latched onto you so hard: to cure his loneliness. he swats that thought away like one would a pesky mosquito. he hasn’t latched onto you, he admonishes himself, he’s simply curious. yeah, curious. 

just a little innocent curiosity. 

disregarding taehyun’s comment, yeonjun raises an eyebrow towards beomgyu. “i know i was drunk when i said that shit last week, but you really have been acting weird since you started at that job. we’ve all noticed.”

“yeah, it’s like you’ve gotten more reserved, or something,” soobin says, words muffled by his chewing. beomgyu grimaces, shifting closer to the arm of the couch. 

“you’re the most introverted one here, you can’t say shit,” kai snorts. soobin throws a chip at his head.

“anyway,” yeonjun butts in with a scalding glare before an argument can begin. soobin and kai blanch, mouths closing. “we’re just…concerned about you.”

“is this some kind of intervention?” beomgyu laughs, disbelief apparent in his tone. he’s fine. he has you now.

“no, we just want you to know that there’s other things you could do that would make you happier than work at a fucking funeral home,” taehyun says, eyes still not straying from the tv. 

“like joining my dance crew,” yeonjun tacks on. 

beomgyu sighs. they’re kind of right, if he’s being honest with himself, but is he ready to put himself out there again? is he ready to face the potential of rejection, of failure? he’s had his life fall apart in front of his eyes once already, what if it happens again?

“...i guess.”

“c’mon.” yeonjun shifts around until he’s leaning on his elbows, focus solely on beomgyu. “tryouts are next saturday. i know how fast you can learn choreography. hell, you could probably learn something in a couple hours and be fine.”

“honestly, you’ll never know if you don’t try,” soobin chimes in. “it might end in something good.”

“yeah,” beomgyu says before taking another large swig of beer. “yeah, i know.”

and so another weekend passes, and monday returns once again. 

soobin’s brief, sage advice plays through his mind again and again. although he understands that soobin meant for it to apply to his current career situation, beomgyu has adopted it for his situation with you instead. he should try, he’s going to try, eventually. 

it might end in something good, he tells himself over and over again. he has to try.

mondays are a bit less excruciating now that you’re around. he has only known you for a week, but it’s been long enough to know that you make his day-to-day routine bearable — hell, he’ll stay at his terrible job as long as you keep showing up each morning. the day that you don’t will be the nail in his coffin — he chuckles at his stupid joke. yeonjun is rubbing off on him too much.

the sky is overcast today, and endless expanse of gray that contrasts the warmth of the changing leaves that line the sidewalk. it might rain soon, he surmises, but he hopes that it won’t. he’s forgone an umbrella today. digging his hands further into his coat pockets, he ducks into the subway station, descending the stairs and weaving through the crowd until he finds his usual platform. when he gets there, you’ve already arrived, ears vacant of those white earbuds, but it’s not a foreign sight to him. you typically put them in once you sit down. the fact that you get on and get off at the same stop as him…he almost likes to think of all of this as fate. 

maybe the universe really is trying to apologize. 

the subway arrives at the platform a few minutes later — minutes in which he tries not to stare at you. he’s not a creep, he swears that he’s not. he’s not a creep, he’s not a creep — he repeats this to himself as he follows behind you into the subway car the two of you frequent, he finds a seat across from you a few feet to your left. he can’t be too obvious.

and most importantly, he’s not a creep. 

you dig around in your bag. ah, here come those infamous earbuds, he’s sure of it — but then they don’t, and then the digging through your bag grows a degree more frantic, your lips parting as you continue shoving whatever is in there aside in search of your most precious possession.

you feel like crying as panic surges through your veins. oh god, you forgot them. how could you have forgotten them? what are you going to do now? 

beomgyu decides to tap into your mind in that moment, finding you in an unbelievably frazzled state. his heart clenches in his chest, he wishes he could help somehow…

wait. he could…oh my god, he could. no, that’s sick, he’s not a creep — well, no, he could. he definitely fucking could, and you’d probably end up liking it…

he could be your temporary replacement for today — no, he could become your constant source, the one you need to get through the day. he could become your audios. he wants to. they’d be far more…interactive, if he did, after all. you’d love what he could do to your pretty fucking body just with access to your mind. reading thoughts isn’t the only thing he can do — and soobin’s right: he’ll never know if he doesn’t try. how could he sit here any longer and not give in to his burning desire to ravage you? you know what? fuck it. this is the perfect opportunity, served up once again on a silver platter, waiting for him to take. he’s not going to let it slip away again — and oh, you just look so devastated right now, how terrible would he be if he didn’t help you?

in a split-second moment, beomgyu decides that today is the day. deep breath. focus. okay, he can do this. one, two, three…

“hello, pretty girl.”

you flinch before you look up and around, only to find no one is looking at you — well, he is, but through his peripherals. wouldn’t want to get caught, would he? suppressing a smirk at your reaction, he shifts in his seat.

“was someone just talking to me?” you ask yourself, brows furrowing as your eyes continue to dart around. your hand comes up to your ear to see if you accidentally remembered your earbuds, your frown deepening when you register that they are, indeed, not in your ears. glancing around again, your eyes skirt over his form. he shivers at the thought of what’s to come, biting his lip as he avoids your gaze. “is this some sort of prank?”

“calm down, sweetheart, this isn’t a prank. now, stop looking around, you’re the only one who heard me.”

your brain flits from thought to thought so quick he can barely keep up, the volume of them rising as you panic. your fingers clench the strap of your purse as if to ground yourself. “am i hallucinating right now? what the fuck? this has to be a prank. should i go to the doctor’s? no, my boss would kill me if i called out, but fuck, i should really go if i’m hearing things—”

beomgyu chuckles, the sound echoing through your mind as well. freezing, your muscles lock up as you look around again. your distressed stream of consciousness stops for a moment, before resuming at a much more rapid pace. “what the fuck, i need to call out right now, where’s my phone—”

sighing, he leans back into his seat and closes his eyes. so cute, how easily you spiral. “quiet that pretty little head of yours, pretty girl. you’re not hallucinating, this is all real. very real.”

a few moments pass before your internal freakout quiets down. for once, silence fills your mind…and rather than him break it, it’s you: “someone’s…talking to me through my mind? this is real?”

“such a smart girl. you figured it out so quickly,” beomgyu taunts, resisting the urge to coo again. adrenaline rushes through his veins, urging him to continue. you need him. he can make you happy. he just needs to hear you say it.

your thighs press together at the praise, fingers digging into the trousers you had chosen to wear. you shouldn’t be feeling like this. this is strange, terribly strange, and even a little frightening, now that you are aware that someone — that a complete stranger, at that — has full reign over your conscious. yet, at the same time, you’re curious to see how this will play out.

“and you can speak to me, too, if you focus hard enough…” his voice trails off. okay, you can do that. allowing your eyelids to flutter shut, you begin to breathe deeply until even the mechanical noises of the subway and the murmurs of passengers vacate your senses. mind empty, you exhale a shaky breath. focus. stay focused. 

“hmm, impressive. you’re a natural at this.” god, he needs to quit praising you like that with his deep voice. by the way he laughs, you know he heard that too. fuck. 

“who are you and why the fuck are you in my brain?” you decide to ask. straight to the point, no fluff to it, it’s reminiscent of your attitude at the bar where he first laid eyes upon you. this is the wall you put up towards strangers and any other threat to your life, but little do you know, beomgyu’s breached that wall already. this is just a little front. “answer me, you fucking asshole—”

“woah, woah, watch the language. why would i tell you who i am? it’s much more exciting this way, don’t you think?” the smile in his voice is unmistakable, but he purses his lips to keep them from curling upward. 

you start to gnaw on your bottom lip, biting hard enough for pain to bloom across your nerve endings. this is stranger you’re talking to right now, a stranger who you’re talking to through your fucking thoughts. this is weird. you never signed up for this. “get the hell out of my mind before— before i—” 

“before you what? can’t kick me out, you don’t know how to do that, pretty girl.”

fuck, he’s right — wait, if he’s in your mind right now, can he also control it? is he going to hurt you? is he going to make you his puppet and go on a murder spree? is he in this car with you, or somewhere else? what if…what if…

beomgyu can almost feel your panic swelling in his own chest. fuck, he needs to put a stop to your spiraling before it gets out of control. if you freak out now, then all of his work over the past week will be for naught. after all, he’s not going to do anything without your permission. the last thing he wishes to do is scare you off completely before he can have his fun. with great urgency, he cuts off your ramblings, “hey, now, relax for me, princess. i’m not going to hurt you. i’m as human as you are, just a bit…different, i guess. and i am in the same car as you right now.”

rather than respond, you look around again, eyeing every single man around you with suspicion, even him. he stares at the floor, maintaining what he hopes to be a neutral, borderline bored, expression. he needs to keep it together. he’s gotten this far, he can’t ruin this. “looking around again, huh? if i were that easy to spot, then this game wouldn’t be very fun, would it?” 

“game? fucking with my mind is a game to you?” 

the corners of his lips twitch up before he’s forcing them back down. this is it, the moment he has been waiting oh so patiently for. keep it together.

“well, not really — i actually have a proposition for you, if you’d hear me out.”

scoffing, you urge him along. “just get on with it.”

“so impatient. that’s okay. i can work with that,” he smirks. “i know what you listen to every morning, you know.”

your heart drops to your stomach. he what? oh god, you think you’re going to be sick. your arms wrap around your stomach, squeezing hard. this is bad, this is really fucking bad. “do you want money, or something? are— are you trying to blackmail me right now? i’ll have you know, i’m actually kinda broke right now. i really don’t wanna end up homeless, can you just. pick someone else to fuck with? there’s like twelve different businessmen in this car, i’m sure they’re rich and corrupt—”

beomgyu’s brows raise imperceptibly. jesus, are you always this flighty? “woah, chill. i’m not here to judge you — or blackmail you, for that matter. i’m not evil. aw, don’t look all shameful now. i told you i’m not here to judge — i actually wanna help you, if you’d let me.”

“help me?” you dumbly echo. “help me how?”

“well,” he starts. “i noticed you forgot your earbuds today, and you just looked so sad and lost without them. how else are you going to get through your commute? and then i thought maybe i could do something about that. y’know, help you out, get you through the morning.”

“so you invaded my privacy just to tell me that you wanna dirty talk to me for the rest of my commute? is that what you mean? ‘cause if so, that’s pretty weird,” you reply, though your stray thoughts that dart around tell him that you’re actually considering his offer — it’s tempting, isn’t it? to give in, to let his deep voice get you all squirmy and needy, knowing he could be anyone in this subway car. still, your words make him laugh, because of course you’re deflecting right now. it’s okay, he hasn’t given you the full story quite yet.

“that’s only part of my offer, princess,” he starts. “i can read minds, yes, but i can also do…other things.”

oh, you’re really considering it now. maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to let him. his voice is nice, and maybe, just maybe, it’s kind of making you horny. after a deep, long breath, you gulp once, then, with curiosity dripping from your tone, you ask, “...like what?”

jackpot.

beomgyu’s high on a mix of adrenaline and dopamine, utterly giddy because he’s got you right where he wants you, where he needs you. he’s played his cards just right, shoved your worries to the side and drew out your curiosity enough that you’ve taken his bait. perfect, oh, this is perfect. he knew you’d be good for him.

“it would be much easier for me to show you.”

“then show me,” you immediately reply, heat flooding your cheeks at the sheer desperation in your voice. god, calm down. he hasn’t even done anything yet.

chuckling at your internal conflict, he decides not to comment. “tell me if you don’t like something. i’ll stop.” he watches as you slightly nod to yourself, a soft “okay,” echoing through your head and into his — thus, he sets his plan into action. 

something warm caresses your calf, but when you look down, there’s nothing there. your eyes widen — was that a hand? it definitely felt like one, the way it creeped up the back of your leg, calloused fingertips pressing into your skin. a shiver races down your spine. that had to have been him. 

“it was,” he confirms, then his voice is growing impossibly deeper, adopting that gruff edge that you love so much. “you want more, princess? i can give you more.”

another phantom hand skirts over your waist, dragging down over your hips to your right thigh, just to stop there. biting your bottom lip, you nod, hoping that whoever is in your head right now sees it, wherever he is. the hand moves to your inner thigh; despite how tightly pressed together they are, it skirts over your skin with ease, seemingly beneath your trousers. “i need words, pretty girl, or i might just stop right now. and we wouldn’t want that, would we?”

no, you wouldn’t, not at this point. the unbearable ache currently building in your core makes you want to cry; you haven’t felt this level of desperation in a while, and you need to be touched. you need it so fucking bad. 

“please.” the single word comes out meek, quiet. shame flushes your face, a fiery heat that spreads up to your ears and down your neck. 

you hear the way his breath shudders, causing your own hitch. “fuck, you’re so cute, but i need more than that. beg. beg for me to touch you.”

his voice — fuck, his voice is so deep, so dark and wanton. you wonder what he sounds like when he’s moaning, how he would sound if he fucked you, pounded you into the mattress so hard you saw stars. the image of a faceless stranger fucking you from behind, your back arched behind you and your face buried in the sheets, as he holds your wrists behind your back flits across the big screen of your mind. you shake it away, but the man in your head is already tutting. “use your words, sweetheart, not pictures — though i’d love to do that to you too. you’ve got quite the imagination on you.” 

beomgyu’s cock twitches in his boxers as you whine, frantic pleas bubbling up from the deepest, darkest recesses of your mind once he takes the sensation of his hand away from your thigh. you sound halfway dumb already, begging for his hands, his cock, his tongue — anything. you’ll take anything just, “please, sir. please touch me. need you to touch me so bad.”

you don’t even know who he is, yet you’re being so obedient, calling him sir, begging so sweetly for him — it’s like you’re begging straight into his ear. his heart swells at the thought, as does his cock. you sound so pretty, but he finds himself wishing he could hear these words come from your lips instead. 

“yeah? my little slut needs more?” he prods, laughing meanly when you whimper out a yes. “aw, ‘course she does. desperate whores always need more, don’t they? so greedy.”

you have to swallow down a whimper at that, focusing so intently on keeping quiet that your nails have dug into your palms deep enough to almost break skin. the pain seems to help keep you grounded — that is, until you feel the sting of a palm against your backside. you flinch in your seat, gasping sharply. the man sitting next to you glances over, but you only hang your head and shrink into yourself. he looks away. 

“focus, whore. you’re drawing too much attention to yourself.”

two hands are touching you now. one cupping your pussy, the other wrapped around your throat, pressing into the sides of your neck so you start to grow dizzy. the hand on your throat releases its grip to slide down to your chest, circling around one of your nipples before a thumb swipes over the pebbled flesh. your back arches off of your seat when the sensation morphs into that of lips, plush warmth enveloping your tit before the sharp bite of teeth interrupts. you inhale a shaky breath from your nose as lips return to soothe the sting. despite the hard press of your thighs, the hand on your pussy drags up and down your folds, dipping down to your entrance before dragging up to your clit. a tiny squeak sneaks up your throat before you’re masking it with a cough. 

“aren’t you just a sensitive little thing? so wet too,” he coos, shifting his briefcase over his lap to gain some semblance of friction. his fingertips tingle as if your wetness coats them right now. fuck, he’s hard. if it were up to him, you’d be taking his cock right now, moaning so prettily as he presses you up against the wall and fucks up into you, your legs giving out from under you because he’s just making you feel so good, isn’t he? never mind that, he has a job to do. “how about i just…”

two lithe fingers breach your walls while a thumb continues to slowly circle your clit, barely brushing over the sensitive bundle of nerves. you feel like you’re going insane, trying your best to hold still as his fingers begin to move inside you, curling up into your walls. searching, he’s searching for that spot inside you that will get you crying—

then he finds it. 

your knee jerks up, your legs falling open slightly before you’re pressing them closed again as he abuses it over and over again, crooking his fingers just right to find it with each thrust. your hips roll up into the sensation, stilling as soon as you realize that you’re squirming too much, being too obvious. people are starting to stare, calm down. calm the fuck down.

god, you don’t think you can. it’s too difficult to keep still with the way he’s finger-fucking you right now. with the way there’s lips suddenly circling your clit, sucking the pearl in so that his tongue can play with it. little kitten licks that make you want to scream and cry and beg for mercy because you don’t know if you can keep up this front of normalcy with the way he’s touching you.

it’s like he’s speaking directly into your ear right now, warm breath fanning over your earlobe, your cheek. “wanna see you fall apart, wanna see you lose it in front of all of these people, baby. bet you wanna cum right now, yeah? just wanna feel good, don’t even care if you quake and cry in public? you’re that fucking desperate for it?” 

you nod to yourself, eyes squeezing shut. you’re so close. oh god, you’re going to cum. you’re going to cum like a brainless whore in the middle of a fucking subway car. you’re sick. you’re fucking sick for enjoying this.

you’re just as bad as him, beomgyu decides. he knew you’d like what he could give you, he knew you needed him. it was just a matter of time before you realized that fact. that’s okay, because he needs you just as badly. it’s a carnal need, white hot in the center of his stomach — fuck, he’s obsessed with you. he wants you to be his forever. 

and beomgyu knows you’re close, but he’s not quite ready to give you what you want. 

“please, oh god. please let me cum. fuckfuckfuck— no, please don’t stop!” you cry as he slows the pace of his fingers. “please no, ‘m so close! no no no—”

“you drive me crazy, it’s only fair if i return the favor. makes it more fun.” ripping the sensation away from you completely, he watches you bottom lip tremble as you blink back tears, your body melting into your seat as the pleasure fades away. “now, now, don’t cry, sweetheart. i have something even better for you.”

a few seconds pass before something breaches your entrance, your walls stretching to their limit, yet the sting of pain never arrives. filled to the brim, you throw your head back against the window behind you. to others, you seem to just be resting your eyes, but the way your mouth falls open is not lost on beomgyu. he knows you can feel him everywhere, knows you can feel the way the head of his cock nearly touches your cervix, how it presses into every single sensitive spot inside you. he knows he’s big, but you take it like a champ, your hips grinding down into the seat, as if to bring him deeper inside you. what a little whore, his little whore. 

“y’feel that, pretty girl? feel my big fucking cock inside you?” he asks as your chest heaves, a feeble attempt in holding yourself together. “calm down, now. i’m gonna start moving, okay?”

he doesn’t wait for your response before he’s spoon-feeding you the sensation of his cock pulling out until nothing but his cockhead remains within your walls. a few seconds pass, then your begging returns. tearful, this time, fucking pathetic. he basks in the power that rushes through his entire being. you need him. you need him in order to feel good, and he loves that you do. he brings a hand down to adjust himself in his pants, hissing quietly at the ache that the action brings. he needs to fuck you right now. physically fuck you, none of this thought manipulation bullshit — but no, he has to be patient. he can be patient as long as it’s you. 

the subway is slowing down again, and he comes to the gross realization that he only has a few minutes before both of you must depart. dammit, he has to make this quick. 

meanwhile, you’re already halfway to your high just at the mere feeling of him inside you. as soon as his cock begins to move again, you’re choking back moans, head hanging low as your muscles tense and your hands press into your lap. you can feel him in your throat each time he thrusts back in, his thrusts growing faster and faster until he’s pounding into you. 

“fuck fuck fuckkkkk!” you wail, encouraging him to continue. in reality, your walls clench around nothing, but your mind paints a different picture. you almost beg for him to cum inside, but you cant find the words, too fucked out to think about anything else but the knot in your stomach that grows tighter with each passing second. “fuck, please. please, fuck i’m, nghh—”

imaginary fingers swipe across your clit, and you’re a goner. 

thighs quaking, your release coats your panties, walls fluttering, but the movement of his cock doesn’t stop until you’re begging for mercy. beomgyu almost cums in his pants at the depraved wails you emit, half-baked sentences pleading for him to “s-slow down, please. i can’t, no, i can’t — shit!”

finally — finally — he grants you reprieve from the onslaught of pleasure. your body slumps into your seat, your eyes shut as you begin to float back down to earth. the clack-clack-clack of the subway slows until it stops completely. the usual robotic voice announces his stop, but you seem so out of it that you don’t even register that you need to get off. 

“good job, baby. you put on quite the show for me,” he praises as he rises to his feet. luckily, he decided on wearing a longer coat today which he uses to cover up his raging hard-on. this has to be fate.

no response. with an excited gleam in his eye, he disconnects from your mind and moves towards you. looming above you, he drinks in the beads of sweat that have formed along your hairline, the wrinkles in your trousers where you gripped the fabric a wee bit too hard, your dreamy eyes and how they blink down at his black loafers before raising to meet his own. concern has painted itself across his features, his head tilting as he holds your bleary gaze.

“are you alright, miss? you look a bit ill.”

you blink once. twice. god, how are you so cute even after getting fucked so hard? he can barely control himself from blurting out who he is.

“what—what stop is this?” you ask him, eyes wide and red-rimmed from your earlier tears. he tells you, and he watches those same eyes widen. “oh shit, this is my stop!”

attempting to stand, you stumble straight into his chest. he catches you with gentle hands before he’s helping you steady yourself. your legs tremble like those of a newborn fawn, sexy yet terribly adorable. he gulps at the image of you unable to walk, legs so sore that you’re forced to let him dote on you, that forms inside his mind. later. that can come later, don’t get too hasty. 

“oh, you’re a bit shaky there,” he murmurs, a hand curling around you elbow when you stumble again. “are you sure you’re alright?”

“i’m f-fine, sorry for the trouble,” you reply with a polite, yet jittery, smile, stepping away from him. he wants to tell you to come closer again, he wants to smell your sweet perfume again, feel your warm skin beneath his fingertips. 

but good things come to those who wait.

“no worries.” with a charming smile, he shuffles beside you, until the two of you have exited with the rest of the crowd. he catches your wrist before you can get too far, and you turn to face him once more. afterglow looks wonderful on you. “it looks like we’re getting off at the same stop today, so would you like me to walk with you until you’re feeling a bit better? i’m sure some fresh air will do you good.”

you pause for a moment, hesitating. have you seen him somewhere before? you feel like you have. “i…that would be great, actually. thank you.”

“of course,” he nods, holding back a smirk. he can’t help the words that escape him next.

“lead the way, then…pretty girl.”

the way you look back at him with alarmed realization — even a hint of fear — causes a grin to split open his lips. you begin to sputter as you back away, but he merely follows with light, casual steps. “w-what, who—who are you—”

his smile grows knife-sharp. the door opens — it always does. 

“aw, c’mon, sweetheart,” he coos inside your mind, biting his lip as he watches your knees buckle. “who else could it be?”

© to agustdiv1ne. do not copy, repost, steal, and/or translate.

[gemharvest]

Hiii local pico fanboy here to request him for the character thing :))

YES!!! PICO BRAINWORM, ACTIVATE !!!!!!!!!

favorite thing about them: TBHHHH idk. I like his silly maybe. His whimsy. I angst his ass so much but he's such a goober in canon. I want to put him in a hamster ball and watch him run around and I genuinely think he'd enjoy it.

least favorite thing about them: I feel like every time I mention him I run the risk of someone making a weird assumption about me. Pico toxoplasmosis curse: will someone yell at me because my fave, my little scrunkly, my blorbo, originates from the Newgrounds school shooting satire game. The answer is to tell myself not to worry about it and I go "Okay💗 Yay💗" and continue brainrotting.

favorite line: What does this guy even say fuuuuufhfhuhhkkckkk. Guy who mostly thinks about FNF and has barely touched Pico's School stuff. Unfortunately might have to pass on this for now sorry. You can give me a bad grade on being a Pico fan LMAO. /j

brOTP: I'm going to be so fr I am obsessed with the dynamic you can get between him and Nene. I am studying them like bugs. Tho of course Pico & Darnell's friendship is so good. Newgrounds trio you are so fucked up I love you guys.

OTP: Hey guys do any of you know about this niche little thing called the RGB polyshioGFOKMKFGMLKM>. Very obvious answer but yeah. OT3. As of late I've been having so much fun with romantic PicoGF. PicoBF gets a lot of focus and it has from me too, but there's such a fun dynamic you can get from GF and Pico. They can have something fun even if you take a platonic/ QPR angle, tho I said already that I like exploring a romantic dynamic between them.

nOTP: I don't knowwwwwwwww. I don't think I have a nOTP for him. Yes, even considering Cass (huge-ass disclaimer that I do not ship them, but I can't see myself caring if others do). Sorry LOL.

random headcanon: I think if you asked him if he'd jump off a cliff he'd say no, of course not wtf, but then if you asked him if he'd jump off a cliff because Boyfriend did he'd take a suspicious amount of time to answer. Like that one Dan Vs. bit. Idk I'm trying to think of something I haven't mentioned before. Secondary answer that's more of a headcanon is that I really do think this guy would be a non-traditional pet owner. Like snakes/ tarantulas that kinda thing. I think he'd like rats/ other rodents too but the idea of him handling a snake makes me bounce off the walls.

unpopular opinion: The curse I bare is that I barely go to wider fandom spaces I don't know what a popular opinion for him right now would be. Idk I think people sometimes write him to be way tougher than he'd be. Like, OK I'm tired idk how to fully explain it but in my head this guy's a softie once he lets you past his exterior. He's kind at heart even if he has his whole Thing going on and I've seen takes that ignore that/ aren't aware of it, and I feel like that's the surface-level read people might get off of him. Might be able to put this better when I have a rested mind LMAO.

song i associate with them: *cracks my knuckles and opens my playlist for him* Oh I was built for this. Two because I an never content picking just one, my playlist for him would be massive if I remembered to add songs regularly LMAO.

favorite picture of them:

I feel like this is a very funny choice for "favorite image" but it's specifically this bit in his character sheet. "Kind like how cats stretch out look longer" you don't say... Guy who isn't even beating the kitty allegations in his fucking character sheet. My non-funny answer would probably be his game-over sprite for when you lose to one of the spray paint cans:

>> original ask game here; feel free to send more, I don't bite <<

[crowlixcx]

For the brainrot series - as though you don't have enough requests, but I heard this song again today and the resulting assault on my imagination has irrevocably damaged my sanity, and I had to say something because I will not be suffering alone.

Okay, so, picture this:

Crowley is tired of the way things have been weird in this vague post-S3 world I'm picturing, and he's decided he's gonna Do Something About It (mostly because he's already about 'if I'm not a bush I'm not no one' levels of drunk). Naturally, he decides that what he's gonna do is woo his angel.

Easy enough. Humans do this shit all the time, and without the benefit of 6000 years of mutual pining and some slinky hips. In fact, thanks to his extensive knowledge of romcoms (a must for any demon if they want to learn inventive ways to sow discord among couple, etc, and for no other reason), he's decided that the perfect course of action is to serenade Aziraphale with a song that perfectly encapsulates his squishy, kind of embarrassingly soft feelings that the angel just has to give in and accept his expertly plighted troth (probably not a euphemism).

He is, at this point, at the 'I'm washing me and my clothes' stage of his drinking binge, but he's nervous, so sue him.

It takes him foreeeeever to pick a song (he only knows "bebop" won't do, but unfortunately that covers such a wide and sometimes contradictory swath of all music made since the 1940s, it's pretty impossible), and he keeps second guessing himself, so he makes it to the 'Kiefer Sutherland tackling a Christmas tree' stage of blitzed and hits shuffle on his 'Embarrassing Angelfeels I Can Never Admit To Even Under Pain Of Total Annihilation' Spotify playlist et VOILA! The perfect song! Crowley can't believe his luck, and he sets his plan into motion before he can do something stupid, like sober up.

So, it's about 3 in the morning at this point, and Crowley has set up his speaker system in the middle of the street facing Aziraphale's bookshop, and as you do, he climbs onto a stolen crate (containing an order of dildos the adult entertainment shop three streets over is going to be looking for in about five hours) and shouts for Aziraphale until the angel, and anyone else unfortunate enough to be hanging around at 3am on a Wednesday (mostly Mrs. Sandwich and her girls and poor Nina, who has unwisely chosen to arrive extra early to wait on a delivery of hazelnut syrup), pops their heads out to see what the deuce is going on.

Once he sees his darling angel, Crowley takes another swig of frankly embarrassingly cheap vodka for a demon of his tastes, hefts hus microphone, and starts to sing (for a given value of sing).

It starts off soft, all chimes and romantic piano, full of joy and longing, and Aziraphale's face does that thing where he's definitely embarrassed, but also pleased, so Crowley shuts his eyes, and that's when the disco beat drops.

Oh yes. Crowley is about to fucking boogie down for the love of his life.

He busts out all the moves, wiggling those slinky hips (because he's never been one not to use every weapon at his disposal), belting out mostly the right lyrics in somewhat the right key, generally on time and everything.

Aziraphale's face, if Crowley would open his eyes and look, is now crossing over into horrified, yet hopelessly enamored, with a dash of down bad. His tastes are varied and interesting, okay?

The music fades out before Crowley does, still belting for a good thirty seconds after the track changes to 'The Edge of Glory', which isn't as perfect for his purposes, but Aziraphale hasn't fallen to his knees in besotted supplication (also not a euphemism, probably), so Crowley figures he may as well, and the whole street is both glad and a little disappointed that this is when Aziraphale steps away from the shop door, reaches up for Crowley's hand, and drags him off the box of dildos and towards the shop.

"That's lovely, dear. Why don't we go inside so you can sleep this off before we talk about it."

Crowley, of course, follows along happily, about 80% sure that is a euphemism, and decides send a little blessing to Barbra Streisand in gratitude. He knew 'The Main Event/Fight' had been the right song to choose.

(It was not, in fact, a euphemism, and Crowley thinks the squirming agony of having to listen to Aziraphale somehow turn a love confession into a lecture about proper methods of courtship and being considerate of human sleep cycles while suffering the worst hangover of his entire existence is possibly the best worst thing he's ever experienced. Hell should take notes.)

(They spend the rest of the day getting to know each other, and that is a euphemism.)

Now.

Did I fail to peel this mental image off the surface of my brain for the last 24 hours and decide to share the agony and the ecstasy of it? Oh yes.

Is it the perfect song to confess your love to your ineffable crush with? Debatable, but it has good results of one (1) success and no failures so far, so we can't really say no.

Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk.

The level of detail in this is unmatched. The creativity? Inspired. When I started th brainrot series never did I think I would receive something of this gravitas. Bravo my dear, I'm in the palm of your hand. And the specificity of the playlist turning to Edge Of Glory? Delicious. This is truly, marvellously unhinged. God bless the Babs and to you for the gift you have bestowed upon me. I will treat it with love and care.

[hikennosabo]

now that i've marinated in trimax's ending, i wanted to reflect a bit. i definitely don't have it in me to write a full review or anything lmao, but... it was a really incredible story, and i had a great time. i don't think i've ever cried this much over a manga, lol... usually i cry over audiovisual media. even all my crying about one piece has mostly been over the anime. other manga i've cried over off the top of my head have been different types of crying, if that makes sense (like crying over shimanami tasogare because the queer themes hit home, not because i was overly invested in & emotional about the character arcs). other manga like devilman and csm hit me emotionally but i didn't necessarily shed tears over them, and if i did certainly not as much as i did trimax lol.

i (predictably, if you know me, i love characters with complicated sibling relationships) latched onto knives when i watched tristamp... he is definitely hard to like in the manga sometimes, but his character arc is fantastic, so i ended up starting and ending this journey crying over him LMAO. i really really love all the characters in this story, except for like... the cartoonishly evil one-off bad guys and, as we all know, chapel. lmao. most of the characters are likable in one way or another, by some combination of being cool, strong, charismatic, funny, etc... just being complex and fantastically human, which is only natural in a story about human nature.

and of course i need to give a huge thank you to @trigunbookclub, @revenantghost for organizing, @trigun-manga-overhaul for the incredible scans & translation, and everyone in the tag for making this such a fun experience!

i loved reading everyone's posts, it really helped fuel the brainrot, and writing my own posts ended up being A Task but also fun. even though i feel my posts were mostly an exercise in inventing new ways to portray crying and screaming over text as opposed to everyone else's thoughtful observations and analysis LOL. and participating in book club kept me reading at a good pace, otherwise i either would have binged the whole thing in like 2 weeks or gotten distracted and not finished, so thanks for keeping me on schedule lol.

this is not the last you'll see of me in the tag, i still have art (memes) i want to make, there are a LOT of things i want to draw, a potentially (relatively) big project in my brain which i have no guarantee i'll get to lmao, plus character/ship playlists if i finish them, and maybe some other posts as i rewatch tristamp and 98 again. and i've still got to read multiple bullets ofc.

also i was holding back on following people because i was trying to avoid spoilers (which i failed at anyway because i have no self-control), but now i can follow people in the tag sooooo hello and sorry if you see me going through your trigun tags

[h-doodles]

hi, can I ask for your top ten favorite fics ? :)

Hi anon hiiiiiiii welcome!!! u caught me at a good time, ur soooo lucky bc i just glanced at my notifs and saw this ask get sent <3 KDBDKDKK its been literal years since i checked my ask box 👉🏻👈🏻

BUT ANYWAY! top 10 of all time???? be warned that while i am currently enchanted with ONE (1) 6 ft 3 in actress, I still do consider myself a girlie with varied tastes so. my old & other fandoms are mixed in my current list!

without further ado:

#10: knowledge for knowledge's sake by tigriswolf (ao3) || quite an old piece detailing how a change in the personality of one Hermione Granger could have had a massive impact to the story— and while I don't fuck with JKTerfling, the fics I've read from the old fans in the HP fandom are still honestly, some of the BEST I have EVER read. This one in particular irrevocably changed me as a teen, and is one story that I continue to draw inspiration upon when I create dark!AUs for my SI/OCs.

#9: Zutopia by itslivybear (ao3) || the fluff, the worldbuilding, an AU where Izuku is mentored by our beloved Rat God & together, they fix the world problems? GIRLIES catch me forever LOVING this concept like you could NEVER believe <3

#8: (not so) Bad Idea by @sarahpaulsonsoftie (tumblr post) || HEE HEE ITS LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE LIKE HELP THESE BITCHES GAY!!!!!! GOOD FOR THEM!!!!!!! ft a meddling plantita who really mothered; Marilyn Thornhill <3

#7: Hold my Soul by connyhascontrol (ao3) || I got into Trixie/Katya completely by one @montaguehphm introducing me to UNHhhh (HIIIIIII bestie I hope everything is going good and that ur gay keeps slay <3) and I haven't recovered ever since— reading the fics by writers on AO3 was a happy little accident, but one i will FOREVER love, nonetheless. Anyway, this particular fic was SO brilliantly original and YET so entrenched in the personalities between T&K that it ABSOLUTELY just wrecks me everytime I reread it. anyways hi @connyhascontrol pls know ur brilliant <3

#6: I think I'm gonna call him out by hellelf (ao3, users only) || again, another AU for Hermione fic, that's chockfull of world building and interesting relationships! It's been unupdated from its 5 chapters since 2021, but I still LOVE to look back at it from time to time 💖

#5: The Confectionary Chronicles series by cheshire_caroll (ao3); Into the Black series by angelholme (ao3); Hermione Granger & the Serpent's Renaissance series by epsi1on (ao3) AND New Blood by artemisgirl (ff.net) || if it's not evident, i am an absolute slut for fics ft. Hermione being badass & put into a v cool plot w/ insane amounts of world building, so yeah, def a top 5 most contender <3

#4: The Infinitely Curious Woman by chararii (ao3) || literally ALL of their fics are absolute bangers, and while I forever mourn their decision to stop all Naruto fics thanks to the great harddrive incident of 2022, I have nonetheless the GREATEST respect to their skill & talent to bring SUCH LIFE to their stories. In particular, I chose this particular fic of theirs because the premise of Sakura making her own way by shedding off her morality the more she learned & got influenced by her 2 greatest teachers was absolutely nothing short of DIVINE. It was and IS such an inspiration to read, reread & explore, and I will forever love @chararii for this brilliant piece of a fic

#3: The Endgame that never was series by @heleneplays aka me (tumblr masterlist) || ok I know this seems self-absorbed but DEAR MOTHER OF CHRISTIE i literally WENT OFF for a whole ass day and a half going feral for the Relics of the Lost Age series book 3 finale (hi @jamesshawgames pls know im still here and STILL simping even tho i am currently having a brainrot for a different thing on main sjdhdkdk i hope ur doing well dearest mr. chief author sir!!!!) and created this series from my dreams + nonstop ben&ben playlist— and honestly, I think it's VERY sexy of me <3 bc I rarely like things that I do after a while, but THIS— alongside Universal Constant (ao3) are truly my BEST work <3

#2: Across the Stars by nomisunrider (ao3) || I CAN NEVER STRESS THIS ENOUGH, HOW MUCH THIS FIC ALTERED MY BRAIN CHEMISTRY LIKE. its been 4 YEARS since it was completed but HOLY. MOTHERFUCKING. GOD. The story between Michael & Philippa persisting beyond the odds, in a twist of the canon happenings in Star Trek: Discovery is FOREVER ingrained in my heart and soul and honestly once again THANK YOU @nomi--sunrider for SUCH a beautiful story 🥺🥺🥺

and drum roll please!!!

#1 (current): I literally cannot pick between Better than Gold + Little Cat by @lady-dimimi / @azu-zu (tumblr post for BtG | LC ao3); How to woo a Hot Principal by @softshrimpy (ao3); and Lipstick Stains by @weemssapphic (ao3) || LIKE HOLY SHIT THE FUCKING AMOUNT OF TALENT, PLOT, FLUFF, DRAMA AND UTTER GAYNESS THESE FICS BRING ME— its SOOOOO insanity inducing in the best of ways <3 also, i really count myself lucky to get into a very active (x reader) sphere LIKE ITS SOOOOO INSANE i get to consume CONTENT daily for such wonderful characters and these special morsels be like. authors, I am sending you all a MWAH from me

[kaibasupremacy]

For the ask meme, if you're interested in answering: Seto for 17 + 27 and also 23 because that seems like a soft and kind of silly fun question. And also, if you'd like, Pegasus for 25 and also 23. Thank you! I hope you have a nice day/night!

Thank you so much for the ask!! I feel very honored!! 🩵🩵

It’s the first time for me doing something like this because I often feel insecure about my character takes, or because I find it hard to answer questions on the spot. Also, I probably have more for all of these questions but this is just what comes to my mind now at 2 am.

17. Quotes, songs, poems, etc. that I associate with them

I actually have a playlist of songs that remind me of him, or his relationship with various people from his life, that I shared only with a small number of people because I’m kind of self conscious about my music tastes >.>

But there are certain songs that I just cannot help but think of him when I listen.

“Numb” and “Crawling” by Linkin Park, the first makes me think of his relationship with his father figures, the second of the effects of his trauma.

“Hoax” by Taylor Swift is a song I cannot help but associate with his relationship with Atem. I do not really ship them but his relationship with him is in canon Seto’s deepest connection besides the one with Mokuba, and probably Gozaburo. I feel like that song represents very well Seto’s feelings of bitterness at Atem leaving.

“You knew it still hurts underneath my scars

From when they pulled me apart

You knew the password, so I let you in the door

You knew you won, so what's the point of keeping score?

You knew it still hurts underneath my scars

From when they pulled me apart

But what you did was just as dark

Darling, this was just as hard

As when they pulled me apart”

As for quotes:

“you keep fighting because you feel you need to earn permission to exist. you're even willing to sacrifice your own life for it. no—one can grant you that affirmation. no stamp certifies that you deserve to live”

“And I was so young

When I behaved

Twenty five

Yet now I find

I've grown into

A tall child”

-Mitski, First Love/Late Spring (the whole song actually…I know it’s a reach, but my Seto brainrot forces me to see the words “window” and “ledge” and relate them only to him)

“We do not want to be spared by our best enemies, not by those either whom we love thoroughly”

-Nietzsche, Thus Spoke Zarathustra

“No one has ever written, painted, sculpted, modeled, built, or invented except literally to get out of hell”

-Antonin Artaud

“I don’t know what’s going to come out of me,” I told her. “It has to be perfect. It has to be irreproachable in every way.”

“Why?” she said.

“To make up for it,” I said. “To make up for the fact that it’s me”

-Suzanne Rivecca

As for the poem, it’s actually a rather dark one that I associate with him, Le Cœur supplicié by Arthur Rimbaud (tw for discussions of sa if anyone wants to look up how it has been often interpreted). To contextualize, my interpretation of the abuses Seto endured in his life is that they were very brutal. But I also associate it to the profound violation Seto experienced when Gozaburo stole his designs (or if you interpret it that he handed them over willingly in manga canon, how he would feel looking back at that).

27. Their guilty pleasure

Bad horror movies, because he is still the boy who built Death-T.

23. If they were a scented candle, what would they smell like? For both Seto and Pegasus.

For someone that loves scented candles, I am actually having trouble with this one. I’m going for coffee or moss for Seto. Maybe lavender for Pegasus?

25. 3 things they’d want to take with them if they were dropped off in the middle of nowhere (for Pegasus)

Not the biggest Pegasus fan or expert, but I would say a picture of Cyndia, a piece of Funny Bunny memorabilia and a bottle of wine.

[tsuncda]

ooo ok idk if CYMs are allowed in here but

🪑 (chair) — come talk with me! i don’t have any ask games in mind, so come annoy me however you see fit <3.

maybe as ur playlists? bc u have some very cool names for them

omg,,,,,, your mIND is impossibly big for this, bestie!!!! i am a sucker for a good cym and nothing will bring me back to my tumblr rot than one of these bad boys <33

disclaimer that my memory has never been worse when it comes to who falls under the "mutual" category. i might forget some of you and i'm so sorry for that 😔✌️

@destourtereaux is despite everything, there is light (it's all my like,,,, soft core kpop that i listen to when i'm #overwhelmed on a monday evening and still have so much to do even though i'm so done with life itself. it's the perfect balancing act between a pick me up and a cradling hug that doesn't ask me to be okay,,, just get through <3) alternatively; we burn just like stars

@musicallisto is do you even dvicio? (because yeah <3 she's the only other girlie who understands the dvicio brainrot <3 also i heard a rumor that literally all of their love songs are written about her???? and like,,, i can confirm it's true. there's no better subject material for love songs than clara <3) alternatively; summer borne seconds? i only have 5. also; though their lips sound of things done

@amortensie is sing because you just need to sing (it's literally just musicals <3 nixie is that theatre kid out of all my mutuals and she should be immensely proud of that <3. also, there's so many different genres held within that behemoth of a playlist and nixie has multitudes and depth that we might never expect <3) alternatively; mele

@genyakosstyk is the haole boys know how to make good beats on occasion (this one is just a collection of white boy artists (hapa haole included!!!) and idk why i'm giving it to lottie, tbh. i just feel like she'd lovingly roast my occasional, misguided brainrot over objectively average white men like alec benjamin, but also let it happen and learn the lyrics to support me. it's a playlist i listen to when i want to tap into the teenage me who had a favorite backstreet boy, okay? ooooohhh... you know what? maybe this association came about because i associate lottie with &juliet... and they have a lot of white pop on that list.... yeah. i think that's it.) alternatively; six of crows radio

@bright-molina is summer borne seconds? i only have 5. (it's a 5SOS playlist. i think the association explains itself.) alternatively; stealing elias goldstein's headphones

@heliads is do i want roses? only if they sound like this. (it's a collection of music by the k-band the rose and i just,,,,,,, there's nothing more comforting in this whole wide world <3. why do i associate it with lisa? i mean,,, it's not a 1-1 association since i don't think lisa knows the rose exists, but i feel like their ~sound~ fits her vibes <3) alternatively; i am the sea or i am nothing

@oceanspray5 is heavy are the mountains; heavy the seas (this one is my like,,,, indie folk pop playlist. at least i think that's what the genre is...? the sound for of monsters and men. the oh hellos. the lumineers. idk why other than the sound fits the aesthetic of iffah's blog.) alternatively; a little parenthesis in eternity

@noesapphic is the dark of getting it (it's my secret agent au playlist. self explanatory vibes <3) alternatively; cantar

@the-radio-star is perhaps i am digging his grave (one of my oldest, most robust, and beloved playlist <3. it's arguably a lot of genres but it scratches the same itch of ~ooooooohhhh,,,, i'm dark and angsty and arguably a mess but also a bad bitch on alternating wednesdays~) alternatively; saranghae but it's a mournful yeehaw

@permanentreverie is bts mayhaps? (i think this one explains itself <3 but also!!!!!!!!!! bts changed me and so does lindsay. daily. not always for the better of society, but alas. change can never be contained to one linear direction <3) alternatively; thirteen of them but they take up seventeen places in my heart and; this world rests beneath a blood red sky

@biqherosix is tomorrow? girl, only if we're together (i don't think daniza knows txt - if you don't, this is my not so silent plea for you to give them a listen - but literally the vibes align so perfectly. she and txt get each other, they just don't know it yet. listen to 0x1=LOVESONG and tell me daniza wouldn't just,,,,, go feral to that song. also Lo$er=Lo♡er) alternatively; the haole boys know how to make good beats on occasion

@johnskeating is CELESTIAL (for obvious reasons (to her at least) that i will not disclose and neither will anyone else under threat of death <3. but also, it's a collaborative playlist with a lot of summer-adventures-with-your-best-friends vibes and that's cass <3) alternatively; all that's beyond my grasp

[koneko-pi]

@thoughtfullyrainynightmare tagged meee for posting ten songs on shuffle from a playlist! I dont have spotify, tho, so I've shuffled my Likes list on Youtube Music! And it is a LONG LIST. With a LOT of different songs. I feel like I'm about to embarrass myself.

1. Blue Rose, by Somo

I did think this would be a good song for Yami and Charlotte. Of course, because of the title and a line "wishing on a four leaf clover". I like the soft beat it has and use this for some of my softer moments i want to write or draw.

2. What lovers do, by Maroon 5

This is from waaaay down on the playlist i dont remember any significance it may have held for me or my ships XD i think it was one of those songs I tend to brainrot to or just play, as with my ADHD I'm always thinking all the time about things and music tends to help me focus.

3. Mgno, by Russell Dickerson

This is one of my feel-good songs. One you play to just get the good vibes and energetic feel to your day! Brings to mind dancing people, bouncing, running, and just having a good time!

4. Mikazuki, by Sayuri

I don't exactly remember why I've had this song? The beat sounds nice, and I can imagine some nice scenes to it. But it must have been way down on the list because I really cant remember much. I must have likes it just for the beat.

5. Choice Scarf, by Signal

This is another song that's a bouncy feel-good tune. These are probably some of my favorites. I have quite a few with this similar theme with the vibrating beats and not many lyrics.

6. September-San, by Radwimps

This link isn't the original song but a cover version I liked more. It's softer and more "cute" sounding with the two girls singing. It is Japanese because I'm a huge nerd. I really like a lot of Radwimps music too, they have made things for a lot of Anime Movies you've maybe seen, one of their more well-known ones being "weathering with you."

7. Used To, by Damper (damperghost)

I really like future bass (‘-‘*) its a music genre I find a lot of music i enjoy. I use it for a lot of things like writing, drawing or just playing casually in the BG

8. Nonsense speaker, by Nekobolo

This is a song I have held onto for a long time, and the lyrics may be triggering for people, so PLEASE LISTEN WITH CAUTION. Heavy themes of depression and more. This is a cover by Lollia and is an english translation. It has similar themes to a song called "rolling girl" which some people may know, i know it was kind of famous in some circles. I use this song as a kind of "theme" (one of many) for my Bleach Oc Sakurana, who did not have a happy and loving upbringing, and it affected through her whole life.

9. Karano Kokoro, by Anly

This song is one of the two I've picked to be an ending theme for Silver Season if it was animated. And would specifically display images of Briar and what her life was like before everything had gone bad; so playing with her sisters when they were little, visiting The Lorelai when she had the chance, and seeing the other fairies and who they were before things took a turn for the worst. There is a short English cover by Liz Robinett if you really wanna appreciate the lyrics and how they play in who Briar is and her development with Nozel.

10. Beautiful, by Treasure

And of COURSE OF ONE MY FAVORITE BLACK CLOVER SONG'S HAD TO MAKE AN APPERANCE. This is one of the ending themes for Black Clovers anime, the 13th one, to be specific. Listening to it play while watching the ending or an AMV someone made to it easily makes me emotional. I am a huge simp and can be brought to tears with this song and Everlasting Shine by Tomorrow X Together. If you haven't seen either, please click the links. The animation is so nice.

Anyone else is free to share their own music shuffle adventures! I wont be tagging anyone since i see everyone else already has been, have fun and thanks for listening!

[broken-balance-baby]

star death: a bhadra-related excursive essay about my dlc fic

let's talk bhadra (because i haven't talked about her enough, i guess.)

as you may or may not know, i was dragged back into the far cry pandemonium brainrot back in september 25, 2023, in the midst of lies of p and oc related brainrot, against my will.

it started in a dream. or, well, the pre-emptive ending to a dream, the part where you switch premises last minute which makes you lose focus on the first few parts of the dream and shifts you to maximum overdrive in terms of memory and focus. i set the stage to an american high school hallway. the lights are dim. i am playing as bhadra, and i really mean playing as, not am, bhadra, all focal disconnection feeling as if i was holding a controller even if i wasn't. immersion stuff, i guess. anyway. bhadra walks down the halls, rifle in hand, bow strapped to her body. she comes across sabal on his knees, praying to a mirror with candles in it, and she realizes she doesn't see her reflection. then she blinks, the camera shot gets to her, she loses her weapon. the halls darken. the walls close in. sabal and the mirror are gone, and she looks around in panic as she realizes that she's trapped. all the while, the words "no escape" whisper in her ear, slowly but surely, then frantically but melodically, until the rhythmic chant breaks and starts overlapping each others' voices and she starts to scream. overwhelmed, confused, terrified.

and then i wake up.

that, my friends, was the demo version of the fucking bhadra dlc that my brain had pitched to me at a time where i was lusting over a wooden puppet and then some.

so what happened after?

well. as you can imagine, having balanced all types of brainrot in the process hadn't been something i'd ever done before. i had a job. i had video games to do. art to finish. but for the next few days i was frantic. by september 29 i was finished with the plot outline. by october 2, i finished writing.

in three motherfucking days, i was finished writing a ten thousand word fic on what if ubisoft released a whole ass dlc about the franchise's most doomed, most irrelevant-due-to-wasted-potential, most unindulged-or-barely-spoken-of -without-ajay-in-tow character, bhadra farcry4. and it was a fucking pleasure to work with, lemme tell ya.

but obviously, i couldn't have done this on my own. thanks to ros (u a real one) for enabling this absolutely jobless behavior, and now i have myself to thank, for adding onto MORE jobless behavior, as since i started writing this essay during my shift.

but because i love bhadra, and i love writing about bhadra, and also causing her unbearable amounts of pain, i broke through my current brainrot just to write about this fic. and whaddaya know, the playlist came in. you know its bad when a one-shot fic earns a whole ass MOTHERFUCKING playlist.

if you've all read my very eye-catching title, star death is NOT referring to bhadra being dead.

yet.

star death is the title of the first song of the playlist, and the lyrics from it is the fic's title.

there's no like, actual analysis on the song as of late cuz it isn't popular enough so this song has been made with the context of the cynicism found in the fic alongside the Horrors that come with being alive with a heart and mind that isn't there anymore (especially at a young age, i mean, look at these bars!)

I lost my heart at twenty one Dead like the stars in the night sky But they’re still bright (yeah)

but anyway. without further ado:

welcome to star death. and everything it has to do with the bhadra dlc.

so this is how the song starts:

I can see the television Lies to me and everything Ain’t what it seems So tell me why it feels It feels, it feels so real

the pre-chorus here talks about the blur between fake and real. off to a great start! trying to channel reality between the fakeness of it all is also a parallel towards the first few paragraphs of the dlc fic, talking about the reality that bhadra is stuck in, dreaming about ajay's first mission to save her but then it escalates into something that comes from "not quite it" to "definitely not it" (as all subconsciouses create when it comes to perspective.)

and yet it feels real, yeah?

That was the sound of the real world, though. Right now, you are sitting by your window sill trying to steer clear of the cacophonous music, still trying to keep your breathing in check, but you see all too much red; whether it be from rage or the royal soldiers or the blood, it’s never too late to call something “too much.” Evidence does suggest that there’s no other way to consider it until you’re actually watching, and, it seems that the royal army had ideas because you didn’t notice that the house was starting to burn until the room was starting to get unbearably hot, the air in your chest suddenly pumping out so hard you’ve been starting to cough, and now, oh, you’re on the floor because you didn’t react fast enough. [...]

So when the floor rips apart, and you do scream, you realize that this happened before, except a little more wrong than you could imagine. The wind of the fall puts pressure on your body, the open breeze and lack of leverage to help you is nowhere to be seen, and the only thing you can really do is scream and flail. You meet eyes with the floor, but it’s almost as if it’s going further down, the tantalizing thing. The floor is water, dark red water, only Kyra knows where the hell the red could have possibly come from and you just hope that it doesn’t matter because you’re landing in it— and now, water engulfs you. 

continuing on, this happens to be the next part of the pre-chorus.

Maybe I’m the antichrist or enemy And everyone’s against me So tell me what’s the deal The deal, what’s the deal?

again. fun way to set up someone's presence in their head, right? bhadra is set to be her own mind's enemy and it's scattered all throughout the fic! trying to go through the reality and ending up stuck in this blurred line of in-betweens has turned her inner turmoil and conflict into something her head is KILLING her for, whether that be through the mental anguish or the pain of her reality, her trying to run away from that reality because dissociation is all she has... confuses her. she doesn't know what the deal is, why she's stuck in her own head, why her own inner world is thrown against her.

You nearly tumble into the ground as you take the sight in, landing on the ground. “What the hell? What happened to the statues?” “Your brain did that.” Ajay says. “Why?” “I only know as much as you do. Which means, you do know, but you haven’t realized it yet.” “Is this supposed to be my DIY therapy?” You ask. “Probably? You’re just trying to help yourself.”

let's skip the chorus for now-- it's important, yes, but so is the rest of the cynicism and Horrors Contemplation going on with the next few lines of the first verse.

I live high up like a thousand miles above ya Spoke with God and I know that bitch doesn’t love ya I know the universe do me no favors You know when the aliens don’t even phase us There ain’t a think that could save us Like yeah, yeah, yeah I know we’ll find a way To fuck this up again Or is it in my head?

honestly dunno if i can relate the whole other first two lines to anything in particular, although religious cynicism aside (something i doubt bhadra really has besides 'gotta be the tarun matara to help people' as a concept), she has a huge awareness around her that the universe isn't there to do anything for her. maybe even the marvels of the world (or other worlds) don't really entertain her like they used to, or maybe they haven't, because she's known that feeling of "doom" since she was young-- you see it in the way she's started smoking, having spent her time with the reality of adults who also had their childhoods robbed, nobody her age but the Golden Path members who were definitely her only company. but does she know that there's a thing that could save them? does she know that there's a way to fuck shit up again? she's genuinely anxious about it and you know that being caught between amita and sabal has all to do with it. is she too trapped in her head to think about it? is that why she resorts to ajay to help her get it out of her head that there's hope despite knowing something's gonna fuck up?

"and what do you wanna do?" "... i want a free kyrat." (she says, face filled with doubt and unknowing and childlike indecision.) "but i can't choose on my own." [...] "okay. i think i know what i have to do." (her face twitches into a smile, still holding back but now hopeful.) "thank you."

definitely.

so here we have the chorus.

Anyone? Who’s in my head; Is it anyone? I lost my heart at twenty one Dead like the stars in the night sky But they’re still bright

bhadra in the game hasn't exactly lost it. it's the bhadra in the dlc that has, she just doesn't know how much she was going to lose it. she loses her people, she loses her heart, she loses herself. scattered throughout the fic she has completely found out something is lost to her the only way she knows how: through ajay.

“Are you there, Ajay?” You ask— but you’re starting to get the feeling that it’s pointless to ask something that wasn’t there in the first place. Ajay was you. Amita was you. Sabal was you. It’s not anything that was up for debate— however your mind came to be, though these people have crafted it in a way that only made you feel like you could exist when they could, you simply had these versions that you knew of them and ran from there.  And you loved them. You still love them.  Amita was gone. So was Sabal. And now—  “I’m here.” Ajay says. 

[...]

“Then why am I not here, Bhadra?! Whoever I picked to help in the end and I wasn’t there— where did you think I went?!” He said, grabbing your wrist and pinning you to the floor. “Face it, Bhadra. I abandoned Kyrat. I abandoned you! I escaped but you never will!”  “And now you’re trying to kill me?!” “You still don’t get it, do you? I HAVE to! You refused to let go so much that you made this place! I'd have to KILL you to keep you here! I don’t want to do that, I want you to wake up! Please wake up!” “So let me die here! You said it didn’t have any consequences! LET ME STAY!”

and just like her visions of her fate in both ends, she realizes eventually that there's no escape to it. dead like the stars in the night sky, but still bright. damned, but goddamn if it isn't an all-seen kind of damned. everybody knows she is, and so will she.

(bhadra dlc) (star death) (dlc playlist)

[ariapmdeol]

I don't think I have to sign these anymore lol but still, 8:11 anon back once more

Yeah I noticed that S was canon, considering the start of the DLC implies such. I should have been patient, my bad.

Purple? Damn it genuinely looks blue. Easy mistake to make, thank you for clarifying. And noted on the ending conditions, it's all very interesting just how much matters.

Kanou even in death and specifically after threatening Atou, still wants to help out. RIP <3 and I figured something akin to that? My running theory was that he might have been a doll at that point or something of the sorts.

I'll finish what's currently in the playlist and then see about contacting you, thank you.

UTSUGI THE WET CAT THAT REALLY NEEDS THERAPY PLEASE THIS MAN. They all suck. All these men suck and that's why they're so incredibly good characters.

Oh, do you have links to those solved ciphers, if you don't mind? They sound fun!

And oh! I completely forgot about Seodore disappearing from the picture and seemingly his entire existence. I assume that has to do with the DLC start sequence, so I won't ask but am very intrigued.

All these changes are so incredibly cool. This game is awesome. I wish I had better words but it's just so goddamn good.

I'll also reply to the music answer as well: WEEEE glad my instinct was correct!

If I may, next one for consideration because I have Hajime and Utsugi brainrot: The Good In Me by Jon Bellion. Without thinking it over twice. Yes I am going insane over these characters I love gay tragedies where both parties really need help.

And!! I am so willing to shout about 8:11 once you start playing it. So good

I HOPE YOU HAVE FUN WITH THE DLC!! the first scene of the dlc is actually one of my favorites in the whole game (oughghgh i understand whats going on there i explode).

I'll put the solved ciphers under the cut, though be warned that they won't make sense to you yet! These show up in DLC and the DLC 2020 credits, and i'll end with the ones from the artbook (alas no images for those bc we're not supposed to share artbook things publicly BUT i think the ciphers are fine).

YEAH. YEAH YEAH YEAH!!!! THIS GAME IS SO GOOD. every single detail is planned out in INCREDIBLE DETAIL, there's foreshadowing for things that only show up in Interlude as early as chapter FOUR. I HIGHLY recommend a rewatch after catching up completely, as certain information completely changes the context and makes some documents stand out more sdakjdkaslj. this game is so good COE forever!!!!! like. the ending variations mean EVERYTHING YOU DO MATTERS, and makes it VERY difficult to get S root first try (the youtube TL showed this, but there is unique text if you get S root without getting any of the others first. Similarly, if you do S and then E root, there is bonus text (Which the youtube TL showed as well!)

ohh this is an interesting pick for hajime and utsugi! I think it's very neat :D im not as familiar with the lyrics for this one but i think its a cool choice! my personal hajime and utsugi picks are With a Billion Worldful of ᐸ3 - Mili and 神曲 - R sound design (THERES A REALLY PRETTY ANIMATIC FOR THIS ONE BUT IT'S DLC SPOILERS orz ILL SHARE WHEN YOU CATCH UP).

ciphers: some have screenshots, some don't! anything bolded was encrypted.

DLC record 4: (italics is red text)

This is a concept you shouldn't know. Dante sealed it away. What right do you have to access this place? If this information were to be disclosed, it would be unstoppable. I need to do this to the end. I hope that those who have inherited the Sephira factor share the same motive as I.

DLC 2020 Credits:

reference definition: earth execution name: line A target period: 1912-2019

the border says 'square circle'

Draft: God

ARTBOOK:

the image of the Lantern says 'Protagonist'

the image of a certain character and with a horrifically warped text box says (bold is one cipher, bold+italics was in a diff cipher, normal text was displayed normally):

Unhandled writing operation has occurred in record __. ‘saving data…’ Error: player character does not exist. 2019-05.

fukao why did you do this one in two different ciphers. FUKAO. EVERY OTHER CIPHER IS THE SAME ENCODING EXCEPT FOR THE 2019-05 FUKAO WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME (this last one stumped me for a long time. i learned a lot of random skills in order to study cell of empireo)

[hyunverse]

no no no you should never feel bad about your writing it is literally so good. one of my fave things about it is the accuracy like you write them all so well that it just hits even harder. so pls do bandaid my heart back bc it is shattered 🙏🏼🙏🏼 you somehow know how to make your angst like … cute too ?? that’s not the right word but YKWIM it’s just everything written is fitting for the situation yk ? i think a better word is satisfying idk 😭

i’m gonna respond to your other post bc it’s easier but i totally agree i do not know who i want or want to be more. femininely masculine is the superior male idc idc idc 🙏🏼 and hyunjin and felix achieve that so well. YES he’s so aphrodites son it’s literally true !!!!! i’m so happy to see them getting the recognition they deserve, it tugs the heart strings </3

ahhh yes that makes sense. in the us it kinda varies ?? like newbury comics will charge 75 bucks for an album but then target will charge like 20 for the same one ??? i understand the bank acc issue mine is like that bc i have no self control when it comes to food <//3 i gawk over a 10 dollar shirt but will gladly spend 25+ on one meal 😁✌🏼 it is bad

OOOO YAYY that’s awesome babes !!! i’m happy for you ^_^ my week was finally going well until thursday </////3 but it is a okay bc it is finally april anddd that means possible skz comeback teasers ?? 😏😏

- 🐈‍⬛ i missed u this week !!! i was happy to read smth of yours today hehe. kisses 💗

hi loml!! today i woke up at around 12, did my laundry while listening to my maneater playlist heheh. hand scrubbing your laundry is sort of nice when you play music. cooked some kimchi ramen too ^__^ what have you been up to

cute angst T__T PLEASE i laughed. thank you for your kind words angel, it means a lot to me that you enjoy my works. i love writing angst, so the fact that you find my angst fics satisfying just... makes my whole month <3 cmere imma give u kith!!

u saying that he's fitting as aphrodite's son is gonna send me into a greek mythology brainrot all over again T__T bcs i will!!! i will not hesitate to assign each one of the members greek mythology tales. i will!! just watch me!!

OHH i get it!!! online shops usually sell albums for around 80 bucks, but bookstores will sell 'em for about 110. tbh i spend sm money on food too </3 just blew off 30 bucks on pizzas yesterday. whatever i crave, i buy. craving for sushi rn oml...

noo what happened on thursday T__T it's always thursdays smh... it's that day when it's like near the weekend but the day is so slow and everything always goes wrong on thursdays. anyway! i'm here if u wanna talk abt it baby!

GODDD ANOTHER POSSIBLE SKZ COMEBACK!!!!! teasers pls i need it... i swear the sound was released just yesterday. wondering just how many bops channie got in the vault 😵‍💫🫣

happy april, my babe! have u watched the recent rachalog? hyune feels soooo boyfriend in it, i can't im ill!!

some minho pics 4u <3 xoxo bae!

[viluvr-archived]

may I request headcanons for rook, lilia, jade and ruggie falling in love like the process?

PROCESS OF FALLING IN LOVE !

Lilia , Jade , Rook , Azul .

Gn!reader, they're all whipped .

( a/n — the only warning here is wholesomeness, anon I'm sorry I took off ruggie </3 I'm not the best at writing him and Lilia . I ADDED AZUL ANON I'M SORRY MY BRAINROT CAN'T TAKE IT. )

ROOK !

You must be one interesting being and of course a patient one, with Rook's behavior being like that someone would get fed up for sure.

"Y/n, dearest! I've been looking everywhere for you, it's been forever since we've seen each other!" "It has been 5 minutes since I've successfully escaped you."

Rook needs someone true to themselves and vocal about their feelings and passion, he's devoted to them as a whole with their life even more if they're like that.

Rook starts off by fixing your hair, brushing it, or pushing a strand back when it gets on your face, then he'd be more affectionate, then the poems start, the love letters, hell even songs!

He dedicates more time on you and takes the time to learn something new that he thinks is romantic for you. "My dear Y/n, I've come to serenade you with a song I wrote for you, I've poured my heart and soul into this song, I hope you'd like it." And then he's serenading to you at like 1 am.

Once Vil hears it and notices his vice house warden missing he's already going to Ramshackle, he knows Rook often visits there already, and by the time the Pomefiore Housewarden spots him, he's dragging him off by the collar and apologizing to you that Rook has ruined your night.

He takes you out on a date, and the date is practically him teaching you how to do archery. He hunts bunnies and he gives one of them to you, if perhaps he confesses, he leaves the bunny on your doorstep and the collar has a letter attached to it, (the collar is imprinted with an I love you.)

He gets all fuzzy and excited when someone mentions your name, he doesn't even bother hiding that he likes you. Mr. Hunt is shameless.

LILIA !

He needs someone fun! Probably younger than him to introduce him to what's new these days, to get him to be lively and carefree.

"Sweetheart, deary, y/n, I've brought you these ancient fae accessories. I hope you like it! It's very rare to find those these days." He's a gift-giver to people he treasures, but when he falls for someone he practically melts into a puddle.

"Say aaah, good! Now how does that taste? Good, right?" He needs someone to take care of, and he also needs someone to take care of him, Lilia is used to being the one taking care of someone, it's surely a new feeling but he loves it. (He loves it with you)

We all know Lilia's not very talented at ... cooking. So whenever he asks you to taste test the food he made, Cue Silver rushes to you and takes away the old man's food, and Malleus tells him to stop cooking.

"You youngsters! You're lucky I'm cooking for you, yet you don't like it! It's not even bad!" "...not bad, huh" he's so convinced it's not bad that he ate it and nothing happened to him..

Maybe it's the fact that Lilia wasn't able to love someone before, because of his duties. That made him long for someone to love and for someone to love him, he also needs someone else to protect, no?

JADE !

Jade.. it's hard to picture him in a relationship, tho I see him wanting someone who's like him, who can keep up with him. Someone who can tolerate childish behavior and tames them (he finds it attractive) he loves a strong person who can protect themselves.

He loves being domestic, so expect tiny bits of help and some notes for you to take care of yourself. He's interested in what humans do, and one day Cater tells him it's cute to make someone a Playlist, I think he gets reminded of you when the song kay Ganda mo by Frank Ely or Sayo by Silent sanctuary, Hele by Zild plays (it's a filo song^^) also my kind of woman.

Jade looks at you in the eye, so intently, studying you like it's the most complicated subject ever. You have his heart, and he hates how he gets weak in the knees whenever he sees you, he gets so fuzzy and his attitude changes slowly.

He stares at you with literal heart eyes, while nodding at every sentence/word you say.

+he confesses with a Playlist.

AZUL !

In denial, whipped, has big heart eyes and dreamy sigh whenever you're mentioned.

Coughs to hide his blush. He makes you sign contracts that make you spend more time with him like working at Mostro Lounge just to look at you, even the way you move is so graceful for him. Floyd calls him out and says he's salivating but he's just over exaggerating!

When Azul finally is sure he likes, wait no, loves you! He's already planning how to take you out, talk to you, how to propose.. wait, no! Don't think of that yet. You've yet a relationship to establish.

Maybe some cuddles and cheek/nose kisses as payments when you eat at mostro lounge. I see him and the tweels being like those elementary school girls who says "hey can you push me to my crush so he'd catch me." That. Except sometimes Azul doesn't say that often because of his shyness, then Floyd pushes him, (too hard than he expected.) He listens to Mr. Kupido probably.. and crush (filo song >:)) and bubble gum by Clairo.

[jupiters-galaxy]

Random Tokyo Revengers hcs

Yes they’re emotionally damaged teenagers, but they’re *MY* emotionally damaged teenagers!

-Rainy weather soothes Baji, whenever it rains he sits near his bedroom window and watches it come down in the yellow streetlight. It makes him feel calm, and he rarely feels calm.

-Draken actually loves reading books. Libraries were a quiet space away from his chaotic home when he was a kid and he picked up the habit of reading! Comic books and mangas are without a doubt his favorite though.

-Mikey is the world's BIGGEST hot chocolate glutton. He tops it with so much sugar it's insufferable

-Takuya uses a LOT of sugar in his coffee and Akkun takes his without any cream or sugar. One morning they mix up cups. They both look like they're about to C R Y.

-Yamagishi and Makoto consider each other to be their best friend. but they're too embarrassed to ask "Am I your best friend?" So instead they awkwardly try to figure out and they have a lot of "WHAT ARE WE????" conversations. People thought they were dating for awhile because of that.

-Baji and Chifuyu are so close ok let me brainrot about them because I fully believe they're the dudes who are ONLY affectionate with each other. Not necessarily in a romantic way but like. Baji hates touching people, it makes him feel uncomfortable, but with Chifuyu when he's having a bad day he'll just. Fully lean on him. Bury his head in Chifuyu's shoulder, stay there just silent until he feels better. And of course Chifuyu lets him do whatever, he loves him and knows he needs a safe person. I LOVE THEM OK-

-Akkun and Takuya are so close. Of course their whole friend group is close, but Akkun and Takuya have that special friendship that no one else has. Takuya idolizes Akkun because he's stronger, and Akkun wants to protect Takuya because he's a good guy. It started as a symbiotic relationship but they have a lot in common and after a few months of hanging out they just genuinely harbored so much love for each other.

-I'm very soft for the idea of Draken picking flowers from other people's gardens and then leaving them on Emma's doorstep. He’s too shy so he’ll typically knock on the door and RUN. Mikey’s seen him before but he keeps the secret for him. He knows it makes her happy, so it's worth it! Picking flowers from other people’s gardens is just, the perfect blend of his deliquency and Emma’s softer, romantic tendencies!!

-Emma and Hina have sleepovers a lot(besties!!)! Hina will braid Emma's hair and Emma will fill Hina in on the events in Toman. Hina always berates the boys for being so trigger happy, but Emma just laughs and has fun gossiping with her!

-Hina secretly has Mikey's phone number, and sometimes when she's worried about Takemichi she'll call him and ask him to keep him safe. He thinks she's adorable for this, and he'll cheerfully talk to her on the phone until she feels a lot better. He'd never admit it but Hina is someone he considers to be a friend!!

-If Hakkai has a crush on someone he’d 100% try and confess in a dorky way, like with a playlist or something. He just,,, has the vibes :)

-Hakkai would be such a good hugger, not to ramble about him again but lord he’d pull you all the way in and wrap his arms around you and :) he’d probably pat your head :) He’s just so comforting to me ok let me have my fluff about this guy who makes me SO HAPPY-

-Last Hakkai one I swear but he’d probably stay on the phone with someone all night just to spend time with them. Like his best friend? Yeah, he has time for you! He’d stay on the phone with you just talking about anything and everything. His significant other? Definitely! His sleepy voice is so cute and he’d just ramble to you about everything before eventually devolving into telling you how much he loves you

-Hina’s favorite flowers are daisies and Emma buys her a hair clip shaped like a daisy!! She wears it whenever she dresses up

-That’s all for now, thank you for reading my ramblings! *disintegrates*

[isa-ghost]

*crashes in*

Answer all of them (or as many as you want) for Cyber I dare you. We must spread the swirly man brainrot

🖤 How cold-hearted are they? Do they have a secret or soft side? Why or who with?

He can be very cold hearted, but to specific people. Usually ones who wrong him or his closest personal circle. Sometimes strangers if he doesn't like their vibes. Otherwise oh my god is this little gremlin a mush. He's a hopeless romantic and he's very affectionate because of his deprived childhood. His husbands and the people he trusts the most get Softie Privileges. So like, Physxaas, Lyniaas, Miriam, Alexander. His immediate circle.

🎶 Do they have a theme song/song you associate most with them? Why did you pick this song?

This bitch has a whole playlist. It's full of his energy be it the chaotic whore part, the scary demon prince part, or a flavor of trauma he has.

💋 Do they have a lover? If so, who are they and what are the dynamics? If not, are they a flirty type of person or see it as pointless?

He has two, Wylmas and Kraum. He and Wylmas are the most domestic, precious gays ever. He and Kraum are simultaneously the two kids you never put near each other in class, and a couple of pompous Disney villain wannabes (affectionate). Cyber is an absolute flirt and hopeless little lust machine.

💥 Are they much of a fighter or do they rely more on strategy? How so?

He bounces between both. It purely depends on circumstance, opponent, how much time he has to think, and his emotions. If you've brutally pissed him off then there's no strategy, just carnage. Wrong him slightly? He'll be plotting and you'll never know until it's too late.

🤗 Do they have a best friend? Are they still friends and does the friend know who they truly are?

His bestie is Sonny, and given that she carried his, Wylmas and Kraum's daughter and gave them a max of 4 more times she'll do it again? Yeah they're still besties. She has his kneecaps at all times, he can't hide shit from her.

🍼 Do they have any children, do they like children? Why or why not?

Oops I answered this early. Well to elaborate, he originally didn't want kids out of fear of perpetuating a family cycle of abuse. But he didn't. Wylmas broke him with the cuteness of tiny baby clothes and baby demon purrs and now they have their daughter Miriylia. On top of that, he has at least 3 bastard children from all his whoring and surely more than that, which he's now ready to be a father to if they so choose. His feelings towards kids are complicated, but his little ball of kitten noises of a daughter is quickly pushing him to the side of liking kids.

😆 What kind of laugh do they have? Is it deceiving or fitting?

He has a Selection of laughs. The evil bitch cackle. The charming bastard chuckle. The genuine laugh at something funny. The crackhead wheeze. They all fit him well, but the cackle is without a doubt the most fitting.

👣 What do they do when they're thinking? Do they pace, write things down, make thought boards?

A little pacing, a little writing, maybe spitballing plots with Kraum. Some thoughtful hums or shithead looks that give away he's up to no good. Or a thousand yard resting bitch stare that'll intimidate the shit out of anyone.

🥣 Do they have any domestic skills? what are they? If not, how come?

This man can cook so good you'll wish you could fuck the meals he makes. He likes to garden but that's more Wylmas's thing. He can sing and play instruments if you count those as domestic. Honestly Cyber's a helluva trophy husband, he even enjoys cleaning to a certain degree when you'd expect him to scoff like the royal priss he can be.

💕 Do they do good with intimacy or is it something they're afraid of? Explain.

He's fantastic at all aspects of intimacy, except sharing his vulnerability. Aforementioned family cycle abuse said Emotions Bad so when he's feeling depressed or scared, he bottles that up or buries it in booze and sex and hopes it'll go away. Wylmas is good at coaxing him out of that shell though, and Miriylia's birth has been motivating him to solve problems without a bottle.

🌫 How chaotic are they? How destructive can this be?

I made this man to be a villain. He's a very dark shade of gray morally. Even if he wasn't, he's an extroverted whore with magic that can take him just about anywhere he wants, which has given him lots of friends in lots of places over the 220+ years he's been being a menace. There is LOTS of chaos stored in this twink.

🔥 How hotheaded are they? How come?

He can be very hot headed, but he tries not to be. It's a natural demonic temperament, on top of that family abuse cycle teaching him No Sad, Only Rage. He's fighting for his life to unlearn it, and this is partially what's had him scared of being a parent for so long.

🥀 Do they feel broken? Why?

I think if you asked him this, he'd freeze. He's never thought of himself that way, except maybe during the whole Thing(tm) with Wylmas I'm not about to unpack on Tumblr like this. You could call him broken to a degree, but he's put the pieces back together into something different and better each time.

🥪 What meal do they eat when they don't have much time?

You better believe he's pounding down soup or a sandwich. Quality bread if he's REALLY on a time crunch. He's in a rush but he ain't settling for no bagged grocery store loaf shit.

And for anyone oblivious to my favorite brainrot goblin's existence, here's my beloved little criminal in question:

Art all by @bunchofdoodlesinspace, who also owns Kraum. :)

[captainaikus]

Oh thank goodness. I was so scared I’d made you uncomfortable. Glad to know that’s not the case. Also currently getting ready to watch the latest episode of Blue Lock cause watching gay soccer players is the perfect way to distract myself from crying because of gay delinquents aka Tokyo Revengers 😌✨. I swear the number of edits I’ve saved to my phone these last two weeks is insane. You should totally pick it up again whenever you have the time (and ofc only if you want to) 👀. Izana brainrot has escalated to reading the fanfics under the character x reader tag. That’s when I know I’m down bad 💀💀💀. Anywho. You should absolutely catch up on Lore Olympus I just caught up yesterday and uhhhhh a lot has happened 👀. And everyone needs themselves a man like Hades like SIR IM- . Oh man I love yoo takes me back. I stopped reading it awhile ago cause I think it was being dragged out and I kinda lost the plot somewhere. I don’t like when the story keeps continuing when it’s just for the sake of it and it doesn’t work with the plot. There are very few exceptions to this. Tokyo Revengers obv being one of them cause I would seriously be so happy if it went on forever and I got to see what the daily lives of all my beloved characters were like. I have a love hate relationship with Ken Wakui 😤🤧😭. OH ALSO as sad as I am abt the ending I’m so excited for the second season in January (Black Dragons arc is my favorite). Have you seen the trailer? ALSO there was an announcement right after the release of the final chapter saying that Wakui was gonna be doing a special arc abt the Toman founders and I really hope it’s in the reset timeline with Takemitchy cause I need to see how him and Mikey did it all and just their relationship with everyone (adding childhood-friends trope to the number of reasons why this ship has everything). And it also included the announcement of Wakui saying he’s working on multiple spin-offs and I was like AFJBGFDJKHHHGGHGGG YES GIMME *ahem* also I haven’t read the Bajifuyu Letter from Baji Keisuke spin off yet but I was gonna wait until after the manga ended as a source of comfort yknow so I gotta do that eventually. EGGNOID MY DEAR COLD-BLOODED KING SIRENS LAMENTS LETS PLAY. I LOVE ALL OF THESE SO MUCH. Haven’t read them in a while tho 😅 (besides Lore Olympus atm). I recommend Brimstone and Roses, Unlovable Replacement, Midnight Poppy Land, SubZero, Down to Earth, and The Kiss Bet. They’re all on webtoons. OH and i heard that Nagi makes an appearance in the latest ep so I’m excited not cause I’m falling for him or anything ofc. How’s life? Good I hope? And I’m happy that my description was somewhat on point and that it didn’t make you uncomfortable. Oh and also love your sketches so much they look so good 🤩!!! Uh question. Just to double check. The constant asks aren’t a bother are they? I know you said you like interacting but I just wanna make sure it’s not annoying having to respond to constant asks from the same person all the time. If that makes sense? Anyways I hope you sleep well/wake up refreshed!! It’s night time here atm. As always take care of yourself! *sends virtual hugs*

- ✨ anon

Starry!!

I finished reading the latest chapters of the manga (and I'm amazed at the fact that I've managed to keep up with it so far; are we ever gonna get shirtless aiku and i wanna see him with the italian team)

my only motive in life atp (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)

I love yoo does make me feel nostalgic; but yeah as much as I love the whole story, the plot did get dragged out. So like here's the thing, I've watched a lot of k dramas and some of them are really lengthy. Like whats wrong with secretary kim had a good plot and everything, so did suspicious partners but this new one I watched (the penthouse) it got dragged out for so long that I didn't even want to watch season 3; even if it was interesting i'm being pushed to watch hospital playlist even with let's play when Sam and Charles were being dragged with Marshall in the bg i... dropped it. No ill will intended against the author and their artwork; cause they are amazing, but i lose interest with complicated plots. me watching he is a psychometric

The coincidence! I was literally asking abt the black dragons today (wanted to know if Shinichiro is there or not and turns out he is!) I wanna see the whole thing with Mitsuya, Hakkai and Taiju - me having a tr brainrot and thinking if i should work on it or will people get annoyed with me ⁽⁽ଘ( ˊᵕˋ )ଓ⁾⁾ I like manga omakes- they can even be turned into mini eps cause of it - esp with the trio and their pet shop business! (Me thinking of the moment when Baji's handwriting is so bad that Chifuyu had to show him how to write and teach him- he really thought wearing glasses would make him smart smh) and if i do read tr I'm gonna start uploading manga panels on my blog as well- so be prepared to be annoyed ig ⁽⁽ଘ( ˊᵕˋ )ଓ⁾⁾

I'll definitely check out the webtoons you sent me (kiss the bet seems interesting and midnight poppy land has popped into my recs a couple of times). I have to watch the next ep of blue lock - curious to know if Nagi's voice is how I pictured it.

I'm doing alright! Working on wips and clearing them, studying, watching shows *sips coke* and listening to music; we hit another mini milestone - 1.2k (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و so I'm working on two fics; angst comfort

istg the way you guys might come at me for this ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

I just wanted to do something fun on the blog hehe- responding to comments with art. It's not very well done, yea but i'm not used to drawing digitally nor anime that often since I sketch paintings and statues... but its just to good around with my followers and to let people know that i do read their comments (๑•͈ᴗ•͈)

Honestly? I don't get interaction on my blog apart from you, 💙 anon and a few more - and - I like talking to you; esp when you mentioned abt having consistency while having to talk to someone? cause that's how it should be- and i don't regret saying this but the number of times i have unfollowed moots cause of this (big author or not; I'm not gonna engage in conversations if i'm going one sided abt this). So now I just prefer to chat with my followers and anyone who wants to drop in my inbox. And no, I don't find you annoying bb; you're very fun to talk to and I look forward to your visits- no matter how many times! This is probably the most interaction I've received in my entire writing experience and actually being treated like a person on the other side of the screen rather than being asked to write a part two (after its already been discussed many times) or asking to be tagged without my work being interacted with- and by interaction i mean telling me and describing to me what you liked about the fic and all that yk. And there used to be some days when I had my askbox closed so this is a pleasant change from that

૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡

so yeah feel free to send as many asks as you want - i'd be happy to see them ( ˊᵕˋ )♡

*sending back warm hugs*