#you have no idea how glad I am that I got it finished before koa

[rufousnmacska]

Child of Peace Epilogue 5 - Legacy

fanfic master list with all previous chapters

full story on ao3

This is it people, the final chapter of “manorian adventures post eos”. I actually wrote this part a while ago, before ToD and before half of my story was even planned out. This chapter was a special request from @itach-i so she’s been waiting a long time to finally read it! Honestly this wouldn’t have gone very far without her and @propshophannah feeding my manorian obsession, helping with story ideas, and beta reading. So, THANK YOU trash-mates!! Ok... here we go.

(Apologies if the formatting is bad on mobile. As usual, there is a keep reading break but who knows if/when it shows up.)

Easing her way out from under the covers, Manon prayed she’d make it in time. And without waking anyone up. The dog at the foot of the bed raised her head in annoyance, but the other one curled tightly against Dorian’s legs didn’t move. Good dogs, she thought, narrowing her eyes at them. For once.

As soon as her feet hit the floor she rushed to the bathing chamber, holding a hand over her mouth. Reaching the privy just in time, she hunched over, vomiting up everything she’d eaten for dinner. The nausea had been getting worse since it first made an appearance a couple of days ago. Through sheer force of will, avoiding most food, and a deep hatred of being sick, she’d staved it off. Until now. The few bites of roasted lamb she’d tried at dinner had been a mistake.

The thought of the greasy meat set off another round of vomiting.

Closing the lid, Manon rested her head on it and took a few deep, steadying breaths. Trying to think about anything besides her roiling stomach, she went over a list of things she needed to work on that day. Abraxos needed some attention paid to his iron nails and tail spikes. There were several changes to the laws in the Wastes that needed her signature. Asterin was making plans for the birth of her second witchling.

Manon froze. Witchling. She’d been so busy lately that she hadn’t noticed if she was late. Her bleeding was often irregular, and as witches only had it two or three times a year anyway, it was easy to lose track. That didn’t even take into account the distractions of running a kingdom. Counting backwards in her head, she realized she should have had it four weeks ago. Her stomach churned. Oh gods…

Lifting the lid, she threw up again.

Dorian woke to a chorus of low pitched whimpers. Rolling over, he saw Manon’s side of the bed was empty and both dogs sitting at the closed door to the bathing room. The sound of Manon throwing up brought him fully awake and he hurried from bed. Nudging the dogs out of the way, he opened the door to find her sitting on the floor, head in her hands.

“Manon?” He knelt down next to her, his voice deep with worry. He knew she hadn’t been feeling well, but this seemed rather serious.

She shook her head, then tried to vomit again, but there was nothing left. Loose strands of hair stuck to her sweaty face and she looked ashen. He chilled the air and made a slight breeze to cool her.

“Manon?” Still no reply. “I’m sending for a healer.” Chaol and Yrene were away, but she’d brought in many gifted healers to work in the castle.

He stood and she grabbed his hand, pulling him back down next to her. “No, Dorian. It’s ok.”

“It’s obviously not ok,” he growled. But she refused to let go of him. “Let me at least get you some water.”

Manon agreed and released his arm. After years together, he’d never seen her like this. Injured, yes. Many times in fact. Though, thankfully, not often since the end of the war. He returned with the water and watched her carefully drink. As he pulled her hair back and continued to cool her down, he realized he’d never seen her sick with an illness.

“Better?”

“Yes,” she said, nodding weakly. She shifted to lean against the tub, resting the back of her head on the rim.

“Do you want to go back to bed or stay here?” She still looked pale, and a little shaky.

“Maybe the couch,” she replied in a hoarse voice.

Dorian picked her up and carried her into their sitting room. The fact that she didn’t protest worried him. Usually, regardless of the injury, she would have insisted on walking by herself.

She was shivering a bit now, so he switched off his ice magic and moved the couch closer to the fire. He sat, then gently lay her down, pulling her legs to rest on his lap. The dogs jumped up and nestled against her. She rested a hand on the closest one and closed her eyes. He watched her for a while, then realized he hadn’t sent for a healer. Thinking she was asleep, he slowly lifted her legs and stood.

“I don’t want a healer,” she said, eyes still closed. “Not right now. I’ll see one in the morning.”

“What aren’t you telling me?” he asked, sensing something was off.

Manon opened her eyes and he saw the tears gathering, about to spill over. “I’m late, Dorian.”

It took him a few moments to process what she meant. “You’re… “ His eyes widened with understanding. “You think you’re pregnant?”

She nodded as her tears finally began to run down her cheeks.

Dorian didn’t know how to respond. Manon was clearly upset about the possibility, and that knowledge brought a sharp pang in his chest, swift to come and swift to disappear. He turned to stare at the fire, letting the news sink in. 

They’d talked of having children of course. How could they not with the growing pressure to produce an heir. But with the joining of their kingdoms and the never-ending rebuilding from the war, they’d kept putting it off.

His emotions whorled inside him, too many to settle on a single feeling, a single reaction. His worry prompted him to say, “And you don’t want to be.”

She sniffed and dried her eyes. “I don’t know. It’s just...” she trailed off. “We were going to wait. With your magic making you long-lived, I just thought we had time to decide. And plan.”

He felt his own confusion double, finally understanding that some of it was coming from her. All their barriers were gone and he felt everything through their connection. Her sadness, fear, insecurity... Even small, hidden sparks of hope and joy. There was something else hiding within her storm of emotions, but he couldn’t hold on to it.

Dorian leaned over and kissed her, brushing her hair around her ear. “I know, Witchling. I’m honestly not quite sure what to think myself. No one can ever really plan for this, regardless of how hard they might try. You need some sleep. We’ll see a healer in the morning and go from there.”

She nodded, though he knew neither of them would get any rest. She knew it too, but they sat together watching the fire crackle, each trying to figure out how they felt about having a child.

Manon eventually shut her eyes, hopeful that pretending to sleep would bring it about, but the turmoil in her mind and body kept her from it. At the first mention of heirs several years ago, she had simply blocked it from her thoughts. She spoke all the requisite pleasantries when forced to by nosy nobles and councilors. But inside, she never let herself dwell on the possibility of having a witchling. The moment she did, she knew the matron’s voice would threaten to take over. So Manon continued pushing it away, pushing it into some distant, unknown future.

And now, it appeared that future had arrived.

Giving up the attempt to get rest, she sat up and pulled Dorian’s arm around her shoulders, leaning into his chest. He was awake, and not surprised that she was too. “I’m afraid, Dorian. There is no way I will be a good mother. Not with my upbringing.”

She sensed his spike of anger at the veiled mention of the matron. His hatred of her rivaled Asterin’s, which was no small thing. And although the evil had been destroyed long ago, her influence on Manon was still felt by both of them. Some memories had faded with time, only for others to resurface. New ones sometimes appeared as if out of thin air.

Yrene had helped her understand how that could happen, how she could have forgotten some of the things the matron had said and done to her. She’d explained that it was possible for people to force bad memories into hiding, until a time when the mind was better able to deal with them.

The healer had also given Manon a book to read. A passage from it had been running through her head ever since she’d made the connection between her bleeding and nausea. It claimed that abuse could become a cycle, passed from one generation to another.

“In what ways do you think you’d be a bad mother?” Dorian asked, pulling her back from her darkening thoughts. “I strongly disagree of course. But I admit that I’m biased,” he continued with a smile.

This was something she so loved about him. She knew he would think she was wrong, being too hard on herself.

“You are biased. Incredibly so,” she said with a quick smile.

He never dismissed her feelings though, especially the negative ones. Instead, he would get her to talk through them. And often, it forced her to sort them out logically and come to the realization that she was, in fact, probably being too hard on herself.

But this… This wasn’t a case of her feeling badly about how she’d settled a land dispute, or regretting losing her temper with a guard. This involved a child. Their child. Yes, she was the Queen, and the lives of their subjects depended on her and Dorian. But this felt so different. This was more. This was taking a clean slate and molding it into a totally new person.

She laughed dryly and shook her head. “There’s just no way.”

“You said that. Now tell me why,” he demanded.

Manon sat up and glared at him, her patience suddenly wearing thin. “Because I never wanted a witchling. Ever. Because if I’d had one, she would have been taken from me or used as leverage or turned into a monster herself. So I never let myself even consider it. Because I have no idea what a mother even does, how one should act. Because I don’t think I can handle the pressure. And if I can’t, will I resort to the shit I do know about raising a witchling? Will I become the matron?! And what about the bad days when I can barely get out of bed? When the darkness takes over. How can I put a child through that? What if she has that problem herself? I couldn’t bear seeing her suffer. Especially from something that came from me.”

She felt the tears drip off her face, not knowing when they’d started again. Dorian wiped them off with his shirt sleeve and kissed her forehead.

"Manon, I... I didn’t realize you felt all of that,” he said quietly. Then, with a rough laugh, he added, “I guess I didn’t have the best role model for being a father.”

This made her feel worse. She’d thought only of herself.

That’s not unusual. Yourself is all you ever think about. If it weren’t for that bond, he’d have left you a long time ago.

Manon squeezed her eyes shut and clenched her fists at the unwelcome intrusion of old, hateful thoughts.

Listen to me Manon. Dorian’s voice slid into her head through their bond. Not to it. It lies. I don’t. I love you.

She felt him rest his head against hers, then focused on the words as he repeated them.

A while later, when she felt more steady, she opened her eyes. “Thank you,” she whispered. “And forgive me. I didn’t consider your past.” 

She saw his face cloud over with some memory, there and gone in an instant. He rarely had flashes into bad memories anymore, having learned tricks to overcome the words or things that might bring them crashing to the forefront. His nightmares had also dissipated. But they still happened. Their infrequency was almost worse in a way as they never knew when one would hit. He could go months without one, then the next night, he’d moan and thrash around until she managed to wake him. He’d usually spend the remainder of the night at his desk rather than try to go back to sleep.

Waving away her apology, he said, “I’m not sure that I’d make a good father, so I guess we’re in the same boat.”

After a long silence, Dorian said, “Maybe even people who had good parents feel this way though. They may have a head start of course.” Manon huffed in agreement. “But I imagine they still have the same anxieties. Wisdom doesn’t get passed down automatically from our parents. It comes with experience.”

“Which we have none of,” she interjected.

“Yes, but we know plenty of people who do.” Dorian rested his head atop hers. “Perhaps Aven could come and live here for a while? Anielle isn’t that far for her. She could return to the Maze whenever she wanted. Although she may have to fight a few other witches for babysitting duties...”

Manon smiled. Anielle is close to the Wastes, she thought.

Its proximity was one of several reasons they’d set up court here. Rifthold had been leveled during the war, so Chaol offered them his large keep and lands on the western edge of the White Fangs as a temporary seat for the throne. Not long after, Dorian had decided to demolish the castle in Rifthold, declaring it too costly to repair. Privately, he’d told Manon that he had no desire to return to it and relive past memories. He ordered the rubble be repurposed for houses and shops, and they’d lived here since, the town quickly on its way to becoming a full fledged city.

Aven, the Thirteen and Annabee, friends both human and witch... She’d gained so much support over the last few years, much of it coming from the man holding her now. Manon took a deep breath and released it, so grateful for Dorian, and feeling a little more at ease with whatever life-changing news came their way tomorrow.

They’d fallen asleep on the couch and Dorian was now paying the price for it. The dogs’ whining woke him up and he stood and stretched, groaning at his sore back.

Manon stirred, asking drowsily, “What time is it?”

“Early. Your dogs need to go out.”

“They are your dogs, Princeling. Especially when they need to be taken out,” she grumbled, pulling a blanket up over her shoulders.

Shortly after the dogs had arrived as a wedding gift from Aelin, he’d shocked everyone, including himself, by getting into the habit of waking up early and taking them for a walk. He’d come to enjoy the time to think through his plans for the day. And it had done wonders for the dogs’ energy levels.

Manon exaggerated her dislike for them – he often caught her fussing over them as if they were Abraxos. He had to admit they were hellions, which made sense that it was Aelin who’d chosen them. Abraxos seemed to enjoy getting them riled up around Manon, making himself look a little better in comparison. But Dorian had seen the wyvern nuzzling the dogs too. Just like his rider. Still trying to disguise their warm hearts behind a cool exterior.

He pulled on a jacket and sat to put his shoes on, the dogs running around excitedly. “I’ll stop and send a healer up on my way back. How do you feel this morning?”

“Not too bad,” she said, sitting up slowly. “I’m hungry, but afraid to eat anything. I still feel a little shaky.”

He kissed her cheek. “I’ll be back soon.”

Dorian took a shorter route this morning and stopped in the healing rooms. Luckily, the midwife was on duty, so he didn’t have to ask for her personally. Gossip was inevitable, regardless of how trustworthy the castle staff were. But he was glad to avoid not calling attention to what was going on.

By the time he returned, Manon had bathed and was sitting at her desk. It was a sight he still hadn’t gotten used to, even after several years of ruling. She’d taken to this type of leadership quickly, just as he’d known she would. It usually took her a bit longer than him to get sick of the mindless paperwork, but she absolutely hated the meetings. All that bickering and debating... He didn’t particularly care for them either, but he preferred that to sitting at a desk and signing papers.

“The midwife is on her way. I’ll get cleaned up.”

Manon smiled, absently petting the dog now sitting in her lap. Dorian rushed to bathe and get dressed. He didn’t want to miss the healer. He also didn’t want to risk letting his mind wander too much. He wanted children with Manon, bad timing or not. But he wouldn’t push her into something she didn’t want or wasn’t ready for. And despite that desire, he still had his own doubts.

He hadn’t been trying to distract her by bringing up his father last night. Although he hadn’t suffered the same way Manon had, he certainly had nothing to draw upon when it came to good parenting.

Except, that wasn’t exactly true. They had more than just Aven to reply upon. Chaol and Yrene were wonderful parents. As were Asterin and Gavriel, Catrin and Alastair, Fallon and Annabee. They had support and good advice all around them. The thought sent a warm jolt through him, boosting his confidence.

When he returned to their bedroom, Manon was sitting on the bed, her back to him. Dorian looked around for the midwife. “Did I miss her? I tried to hurry.” She didn’t answer. He rushed around to where she sat. “Manon? Was she here? What happened?” She didn’t answer, just stared at the wall. Hesitantly, he asked, “Are you pregnant?”

She shook her head, her golden eyes bright with tears. “Oh Witchling. I’m sorry,” he whispered, sitting next to her and pulling her into his arms. They sat like that for a long time. He hadn’t noticed his own tears until she pushed away to say something and brushed them from his face. He tried to smile, but it was too hard.

“How quickly we both became attached,” she said softly. “It’s just a stomach illness. Several people in the castle have had it this past week.”

“What about your bleeding? Is something wrong?”

Manon sighed. “No. Just stress she thinks. I’ve never been regular. I just thought…”

“The combination of that with being sick,” he finished, nodding.

“I asked Tilda to wait. There was more I wanted to talk to her about.”

“Let’s go.” He took her hand and pulled her up.

Tilda was in the sitting room, tossing a small ball for the dogs. As Manon and Dorian entered, the older woman stood and bowed. She smiled apologetically at Dorian, who thanked her for coming up so quickly.

Manon sat down and said, “This was a bit of a surprise for us. So I wanted to talk to you about…” She trailed off, unsure of how to phrase her question.

“Prevention?” Tilda asked.

“No,” Manon said. Dorian turned to look at her, confusion on his face. “I’d like to know if there’s a way to determine how easily I could get pregnant. Assuming that I can,” she finally said. “I’m not sure if that’s possible. I’ve always had problems with my bleeding.” She touched the scar that crossed her stomach. “And I’ve had some injuries.”

Tilda nodded. “The exam I just did showed no signs of an internal problem, Your Majesty. There are many other reasons a woman may have trouble conceiving however.” She looked to Dorian. “As well as reasons a man may have troubles.

“The Torre Cesme has some techniques for testing a woman’s blood. They are not definitive though. Merely ways to indicate the presence or absence of some things that may impact a woman’s ability to conceive.”

Manon frowned, realizing what was wrong about Tilda’s words. “You keep saying ‘woman’. I am a witch.”

“Yes, Your Majesty,” the healer said, her face full of kindness. “While the Torre Cesme is advanced, and accepting of all, I’m afraid their instruction did not include much about witches. There wasn’t much cause for it. Crochans are gifted healers themselves, and the Ironteeth,” she dipped her head, “rarely visited the continent.”

Manon didn’t know what she’d expected. She knew how rare witchlings were, even with the curse of the Wastes broken. And she knew they fell outside the bounds of any kind of magic witches had.

Tilda turned to Dorian. “The work you both are doing with Terrasen and Eyllwe to build branches for teaching and healing throughout Erilea will only add to our knowledge. I’m sorry I don’t have better news. A Crochan healer may offer more help. Ancient knowledge that I haven’t been exposed to,” she added hopefully.

“I will check with my grandmother. But I know of no ways to help a witch conceive.”

The midwife stood and approached Manon. “Now that I know of your intentions, I can send a list of foods to the kitchens. They would only help in the early days and weeks of pregnancy, but it is a good idea to start now. I would also recommend reducing your hours spent at work. To try and lessen stress.” Tilda smiled at them both. “I know that’s easier said than done. But it is my job to recommend it.”

“We appreciate your advice, Tilda,” Dorian said, standing to escort her to the door.

Before she left though, the midwife turned and said, “Your Majesty?”

Manon raised her head, not noticing she’d slumped in her chair. “Please, call me Manon.”

The woman blushed but gave a slight bow. “Forgive my forwardness, but… I have no reason to believe you won’t be blessed with many childr- I mean witchlings. But if… If it should happen that you aren’t… You have other options.”

Manon looked from Tilda to Dorian, confused. He shrugged a shoulder. “What do you mean Tilda?”

“I was adopted. When I was very young. Taken in by an older couple from an orphanage in Antica. They are why I was able to attend school, attend the Torre Cesme. Without them… I don’t know what would have become of me.”

Manon stood and walked to the midwife. Taking her hand, she said, “Thank you Tilda.”

Tilda smiled, bowed deeply to both of them, and left.

Manon turned to find Dorian watching her, his arms crossed and a smile spreading across his face. “What?” she asked.

He laughed, dropping his head and shaking it back and forth. “You never cease to amaze me, Witchling.”

She tilted her head. “What?!”

His eyes met hers and she felt a jolt of emotion. Reaching for her, he said, “We can wait. There is time.”

Manon let herself be pulled into his arms. Let him run his hands through her loose hair. Let him kiss her. Let him hold her. And she loved every second of it. She hadn’t lost any of the fears and doubts that had plagued her last night. But this morning, learning she was not pregnant…

She’d been surprised by the disappointment that had washed over her. And the punch of sadness that had followed, when she’d wondered if it was even possible for her to have a witchling. She knew the doubts would persist. Probably forever. Life was full of them. All they could do was meet them head on. Learn from their mistakes. Keep their options open. Together.

Dorian hugged her tighter as she shared all of this through their bond. Over the years, they’d learned how to control the connection. They were both able to block their thoughts and feelings from the other, and that had become the default for them. It had been a choice. They respected each other’s privacy.

But the control required to block had enabled them to channel everything back and forth – thoughts, words, images, feelings, desires – over longer distances and with more precision. Manon could travel to the Wastes and still communicate directly with Dorian. He could visit the rebuilding effort in Rifthold and tell her about his day. Now, in each other’s arms, there was no distance between them. And really, the bond ensured there was never any distance between them.

“I know we have time,” she finally said. “But as you said, we’ve been avoiding it. There’s no harm in talking about it. Or starting to make plans even if they will likely change. I’m still afraid of how my problems might affect her.” She felt a tug on the bond and rolled her eyes. “Or him.”

“We should be careful not to let worry outweigh happiness. I don’t know what the right answer is. All of it is a risk. We just need to decide how much risk we can live with.”

She nodded, considering it.

“And Gods help us, she could end up like me. Charming, irresistible, the raw magic of a goddess… Umm, actually, I think I would prefer if our witchling was nothing like that,” he said, his brow furrowing as the realities of his joke hit him.

Manon snorted. “And if he favors you, Your Charmingness? Oh High King of Flirting and Magic Hands,” she said with a smirk.

His mouth opened but he didn’t say anything right away, thinking about all of the implications. “No. He can’t take after me either. Girl or boy.” He shook his head. “Too much trouble. He or she will favor their lovely mother.”

Clicking her jaw, she snapped her iron teeth into place. “Sure about that, Great Dimpled One?”

“We are in trouble aren’t we,” he said with a grin.

Manon retracted her teeth and brushed a finger along his dimpled cheek. “Yes we are, Princeling.”

Several years later...

Dorian ran up the stairs, damning that ceremony for the new healing center in Rifthold that had run late. Abraxos had flown faster than Dorian had ever seen him fly, and he was grateful for it. He’d communicated with Manon the whole time and was pretty sure he wasn’t too late. He burst into the sitting room and found Chaol, Gavriel, Sorrel and the other members of the Thirteen who were currently stationed at the castle.

“Manon,” he said, panicky and out of breath.

Sorrel grinned. “She’s doing great. You didn’t miss anything.”

He looked around the room. “The children?”

“Fallon and Annabee have them all. They’re playing outside with the dogs, out of everyone’s way,” Ghislaine answered, pushing him towards the door to the inner rooms.

He heard a scream and took off for the door himself. Yrene, Tilda, Aven, Asterin, and several apprentices were gathered around Manon. She was standing, clutching her large belly and breathing through the pain as Aven held her hand.

“I’m here,” he said breathlessly.

Aven raised an eyebrow. “Yes, Princeling. We can see that.” The little, old witch had taken to calling him that whenever she was feeling cheeky, or frustrated with him, claiming the nickname suited him. It made no difference how often he politely asked her to stop, or tried to explain that he preferred only Manon called him that.

“Nice of you to join us, Highness,” Asterin said with a wink.

Dorian took Aven’s spot beside Manon, chilling the air to cool her down. “Hello Witchling,” he whispered in her ear then kissed her cheek. “Sorry I’m late.”

“Hello Princeling,” she said, leaning into him. “Don’t let them rattle you. I knew you would get here.”

She seemed so calm and collected, even as another contraction hit, forcing a muffled scream. But she breathed through it, exactly as Tilda had shown them a few weeks ago.

Aven plopped down in a chair, looking almost as exhausted as Manon. She caught Dorian watching her and said, “Just because I’m old and wise doesn’t mean I know anything about this.”

“But you had a son,” he countered.

She waved a hand. “Yes but I had others telling me what to do. And besides, that was a long time ago.”

Dorian glanced sideways at Manon.

She's not handling the stress of seeing me in pain very well. I was actually thinking of sending her out. Not exactly a good sign is it?

He hadn’t been there long but this was the first flash of worry he’d seen on her face. I'll handle it. We have enough people in here anyway I think. Unless you’d like me to invite Chaol in?

Manon threw her head back and laughed. When the next contraction hit, Yrene motioned to the apprentices and said, “It might be time to push.”

Dorian helped her to the bed and Tilda lifted her gown to check her progress. Manon winced and, catching Dorian’s eye, nudged her head towards Aven.

With his best smile, Dorian said, “Aven, would you mind finding the kids? I’m sure they’ll all want to see the baby. It looks like she’ll be here soon.”

Manon’s grandmother looked between them and sighed. She stood and walked towards Dorian. “I’m sorry I snapped at you, Dorian.” She turned to Manon. “I was the same way when Annabee had Rhiannon. I told both of you that I would be useless in here and you both insisted.”

“It’s ok, Aven,” Dorian said. “I don’t want anything to happen to her either.”

She smiled and patted his cheek.

As he walked her to the door, he became serious and said,“You must know how much it means to her that you’re here?”

“I do know. Because it means so much to me that she’s here.” She wiped the tears from her eyes. “Call me when she’s all done and smiling again.”

Aven left and Dorian returned to Manon, who was back to standing. Tilda had readied her supplies and motioned for her apprentices to step back. She looked from Dorian to Manon and said, “Ok, Manon. With the next contraction, I want you to push.”

Grandmother led Will and Sophie towards their parent’s bedroom. Practically everyone they knew was in the sitting rooms, laughing and smiling and hugging. The twins could barely contain their own excitement, pulling their grandmother’s hands towards the door. They were getting a new brother or sister today. Will was hoping for a brother but Sophie didn’t care. She only hoped the witchling had beautiful, white hair like Momma.

Grandmother dropped their hands and opened the door. She bent down to them and said, “Off you go!”

Will took off running. Sophie didn’t want to get left behind so she ran too. When they reached the bed, they jumped up onto it, crawling into Poppa’s lap.

“This is Vesta,” Momma said. “Your baby sister.”

Will and Sophie both tried the name. “Vesta,” they whispered together.

Poppa bent down and said to Vesta, “This is Sophie and Will, your big sister and big brother.”

Sophie didn’t think Vesta heard what he said since she was sleeping in Momma’s arms, but she liked the way they were introduced. She reached over and tugged on the edge of the blanket, frowning when she saw Vesta didn’t have white hair. Will didn’t seem to mind that she wasn’t a boy witchling. He just stared at her with big eyes and touched her tiny fingers.

Poppa poked her belly. “What’s the matter ladybug?”

She wasn’t sure if she should tell them. She was happy to have a new sister; happy that she could teach her how to cut out cookies with Will, and how to play with Brax and the pups. And how to read. Well, after she learned herself. “I wanted her to have hair like Momma’s.” she finally said.

Poppa smiled. “You know, I hoped she might get Momma’s hair too. But I’m afraid Vesta is stuck with mine.” He leaned down to whisper in her ear. “She has Momma’s pretty eyes though.”

“She does? Can I see?”

“Me too,” Will said. “I wanna see.”

Momma laughed. “The second she’s awake you can both see.”

“How long til then?” Will asked.

“Well,” Poppa said, “Let’s all watch and see.” He leaned back on the bed next to Momma and pulled her and Will up to rest against him. He tickled them but stopped when Momma gave him a look to keep quiet. Sophie and Will giggled as Poppa smiled and kissed her.

Will leaned over them to check. “Is Vesta awake yet?”

Sophie sat up and looked around. “Where are the pups? Did they meet Vesta yet? What about Brax?”

“And the aunties and Uncle Chaol and Uncle Gavriel?” Will asked.

“Shhh, lay back witchlings. She’s still asleep. Brax and your aunties and uncles will meet her soon. You were at the top of the list. We’ll let the pups meet her when she’s a little bigger,” Poppa said.

Sophie and Will fell back against Poppa, not taking their eyes off Vesta. Momma reached over and tugged on their ears. That was her special way of saying she loved them. Will laughed because he was ticklish there. At the sound, Vesta began to squirm.

The moment Vesta’s eyes fluttered open, Poppa lifted her and Will up and they crawled over to get a better look.

“Ooo,” Will said. “They are like Momma’s.”

Sophie let out a quiet gasp, too busy looking at her sister’s eyes to say anything. They were the same gold as Momma’s, but they seemed brighter somehow, like they were lit from within.

Poppa leaned over them. “Do her eyes make up for my hair, ladybug?”

"Yes, but I think she will be beautiful because of both,” Sophie said, smiling up at Momma and then at Will. He was still staring, but broke away at Sophie’s attention. He gave her a nod and she turned back to Poppa.

“Can you...” She hesitated, double checking that Vesta was still awake. Momma had moved the little bundle so their sister was watching them. “Will you tell her our story, Poppa?”

“We want it to be the first one she hears,” Will explained.

“I think that sounds like a perfect idea,” Momma said, smiling at Poppa.

He agreed and pulled them back to his side of the bed. Sophie and Will snuggled in close, their eyes never leaving little Vesta.

“Once upon a time, there was a beautiful, brave Crochan witch named Allia. She lived far in the south of Erilea, and when she heard about the new witch queen, and how the Wastes had been reborn, she decided to return to her people. She was pregnant and wanted her witchlings to be born in the Wastes, so she hurried north.”

Poppa went on about all the dangers Mother would have faced. He liked to change them with each telling, and she and Will each had their favorites. But every version always brought Mother to the Ferian Gap, not too far from where they lived now in Anielle. Once she reached the Gap, the tale never changed.

“It just so happened that Momma and I were going to visit Grandmother Aven and decided to take the long way.”

“Brax!” Will burst out.

“Exactly!” Poppa said. “We took to the air and flew to the Gap. When we got there, we saw a storm gathering in the pass and chose to wait a day or two. But your Mother had already started through, not knowing that bad weather was coming behind her. When the snow and ice caught up to her, making flight impossible, she found a nice, warm cave to hide in. Once she settled in to wait out the storm, that’s when you two decided to make an appearance.”

He poked each of them in their bellies and they laughed. Poppa always tried to make them laugh then because the next part of the story was sad. 

“The moment the skies cleared, Momma and Brax and I started on our way. As we flew high overhead, Abraxos started pulling on the reins, insisting that we land. He growled and fought and refused to go where we wanted him to go. Since he never acted like that before, we knew it must be important and let him take over. He took us down into a craggy mountain pass, now full of snow, and landed right in front of a little cave. That’s when we heard what he’d been hearing.”

“Will’s crying,” Sophie said, earning a halfhearted kick from her brother.

“You were both crying,” Poppa said, giving her a serious look. “And for good reason. When we climbed inside, we found two little witchlings, all bundled up to stay warm. And next to them was their mother, who’d wrapped them up in all the extra clothing she’d had, and shielded them from the storm. Her broom was sitting nearby, too damaged to fly.” Poppa described how strong and brave Mother was and how she’d sacrificed herself to keep them safe.

Momma reached over and ran her hand over each of their cheeks. Sometimes Sophie didn’t cry when they heard this part. But today, with her sister so new and small next to her, she felt especially sad. And at the same time, happy. She looked over at Will and saw there was a streak of wetness down his cheek too. He bit his bottom lip and looked at her. They smiled at the same time, trying to make the other feel better. It always worked. Knowing Will understood how she felt always made it a little easier to get through this part of the story.

Vesta watched and made soft, little noises as Poppa continued. He told about how Momma winnowed them to Grandmother Aven while he and Brax brought their Mother a couple of days later. He told about the ceremony they’d had to send Mother into the Darkness, where she now waited to see them someday. He told about how they’d found a note stuffed inside their blankets, describing parts of mother’s journey, why she was returning, how she had no other family and wanted to be with her clan again.

He said he wondered if maybe she prayed to the Three-Faced Goddess for help, and Brax was sent in answer. Something inside both Will and Sophie told them this was true.

“The note had two very, extremely, super important things in it. Can either of you guess?” Poppa asked.

“Our names!” they shouted together. Vesta twitched in Momma’s arms, her dazzling eyes popping open at the noise. She must have fallen asleep while they listened to the story.

Will reached over and patted the bundle. “Sorry Vesta.” Then he turned to her and made a loud shushing noise. Sophie stuck her tongue out at him. She thought she might get in trouble for it, but Momma and Poppa were laughing.

“And so,” Poppa said, “since your mother didn’t have any family for you to go to, and since Brax wouldn’t let you out of his sight, and since we loved you both very much, you came back to Anielle to live with us.”

“Happily ever after!” Sophie and Will sang.

She heard Vesta coo again and looked up just in time to see Momma and Poppa smile at each other. Poppa took Momma’s hand and kissed it.

“Happily ever after,” Momma said.

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR READING!!

[highfivecalum]

Dark In Your Heart {CEO!CH} 8

Previous Chapters: One Two Three Four Five Six Seven

◈◈◈

“Wait, so like, is there a lot of sexual tension between you guys?” Nikki asked Maddie as she shoved a mouthful of salad in her mouth. She, Stevie, Nikki, and Jess had decided to get a quick lunch since all of their lunch breaks just so happened to be in the same hour. So, there they were, in the middle of the city at a restaurant that claimed to have the best salads. “Since, you know, you two boned?”

“And kissed.” Maddie added in, having kept that small detail from her friends for the past few days. She had seen them and they all were texting in their group chat, but she chose to not disclose that information until she was ready.

“What?!” The three girls shouted in union and Maddie shushed them once she realized there were a few people staring at the group. Stevie, who was offended that Maddie hadn’t told her, since they were the closest of the four girls, smacked her arm repeatedly. “How did you not tell us that, Mads? That’s, like, crucial information to know!”

“Wait, when did he kiss you?” Jess wondered.

“Friday night at the bar. Well, not at the bar. He drove me home and kissed me outside of my building. And then-” Maddie laughed awkwardly, remembering her reaction to Calum showing up at her door out of the blue two days after. She knew her friends would get the wrong idea, but they were her best friends and she told them everything. “He showed up at my house to apologize.”

“That’s it? He went all the way to your apartment and all he did was apologize?” Stevie quirked an eyebrow, knowing that Maddie was leaving something else out. Stevie knew Maddie better than that and she knew when she was being coy.

“Okay, well, we may have smoked a joint and he may have stayed for a few hours to watch Breaking Bad with me. But that’s it. Nothing- nothing sexual happened. Not even close to it.” Maddie wished it had, though.

“Oh my God, Maddie!” Nikki squealed. “He totally likes you!”

“No.” Maddie deadpanned. “He doesn’t. He’s my boss and he was being polite and apologizing and he didn’t want to drive home while he was high. There’s nothing more to it, okay? Can we drop it?”

She hoped her friends would listen to her wishes and drop the conversation, maybe start talking about one of their lives, but alas, they didn’t listen to her. And as Maddie ate, she tried to ignore her three best friends who were concocting a plan to set the two of them up. It would never happen, though, Maddie knew.

◈◈◈

“Welcome to Hood Publishing!” Maddie smiled up at the woman in front of her, the woman she recognized as Calum’s sister from the picture that was on his desk. “How can I help you?”

“Hi! I’m Mali, Calum’s sister, is he here?”

“One second,” Maddie held up a finger and pressed the intercom button to page him. “Hi, Mr. Hood, um, your sister is here. Are you busy?”

“Not busy, Maddie. Send her in.”

“Thank you,” Mali smiled and quickly pulled Calum’s office doors open, not bothering to shut them behind her. She rushed over to his desk, leaning over and whisper-shouting, “Maddie? As in the Maddie you were telling me about?” Calum looked away from his sister, knowing that she would have something to say. “Calum! You didn’t tell me that she is your assistant!” Mali huffed as she sat down in one of the plush chairs.

“Yeah, I know. I  strategically left that piece of information out.”

“She’s so pretty, Cal!” Mali gushed, looking over her shoulder to look at Maddie who was doodling on a piece of paper and nodding her head along to the soft music that was playing throughout the office. “Like, gorgeous!”

Calum looked up once again, pulling his lower lip into his mouth as he watched Maddie talk and laugh with one of his employees, her white teeth on display from her wide smile and he found himself, without even noticing it, smiling at the sight of her. Mali wasn’t wrong; Maddie was a sight to be seen, and Calum was glad he got to see her everyday. Even if all he could do was look.

“Oh my, God,” Mali squealed, covering her mouth with her fingers as she watched her smitten brother admire his off limits assistant. “You like her!”

“Mali.”’Calum warned his overly excited sister. “Don’t start. Please.”

Mali completely ignored her brother and his pleasing eyes and continued talking, mostly rambling to herself. “Wait, I thought you said you were seeing her? You make a point to, like, never do anything with your employees. What’s different about her?”

“First of all,” Calum held up a finger. “I never said I was seeing her. Second of all,” he held up another finger. “I met her before I knew she was going to be my assistant. And third of all,” another finger. “I don’t know. She’s just- she’s different.”

“This is so great.” She had only seen her brother smitten over women a handful of times, so it was a rare occurrence for him to talk highly about a girl. Mali once again, repeating herself, squealed and gasped. “You like her, Cal! Your face tells it all.”

“Okay, shut up,” Calum rubbed his eyes with the balls of his hands and blew a raspberry. He couldn’t tell Mali that she was wrong about him liking Maddie, because then he would be lying, and Calum wasn’t a liar. Especially not to his sister. And even if he did lie, Mali would have seen right through him. “Why are you really here?”

He didn’t want to talk about his feelings for Maddie because then that would make them real. He knew how he felt, he knew it was more than just physical attraction, and that scared him. He didn’t do feelings or relationships, especially not with his employees, so liking Maddie caused problems. Problems that he didn’t want to face.

“Right, right.” Mali unzipped her wallet and held up a ten dollar bill.

“What’s that?”

“I’m paying you back for brunch a few days ago.”

“No, you’re not.” Calum threw the bill back at her and she pouted.

“Cal! You never let me pay you back.”

“Yeah, because I don’t need you to. Keep your money, Mali.” Calum shooed her away and Mali scoffed. She didn’t take offense to it, knowing how Calum was and that he was a busy man since he ran the company and all and didn’t have all the time in the world to argue over something as petty as money, so she got up and smirked at him deviously.

“Fine. I’ll just go talk to your assistant instead.”

“Mali!” Calum whisper-yelled. “Do not do that. She’s working.”

Mali turned around, seeing Maddie leaning back in the white leather chair, one leg crossed over the other, filing her nails. It was just after lunchtime, which meant she had already finished everything she had to do, so Calum didn’t mind that she was relaxing. She did a lot for him and when it came to Maddie, he wasn’t as big of a hard ass as he was to his other employees.

“Hm, she looks really busy, Cal. I think I’ll go busy her and talk about you.”

“Mali-Koa, I swear to God-“

“I’m kidding, jeez!” Mali threw her hands up in surrender and giggled loudly. “Calm down and stop being so tense all of the time. I’m going back to the hotel. See you later, lover boy!” Mali sauntered towards Maddie’s desk, holding out the ten dollar bill to her.

“Um,” Maddie drew her eyebrows together and exhaled a laugh at Calum’s pretty older sister. “What’s this?”

“Give this to my brother and make sure he takes it. He never accepts my money anymore. Since he’s rich,” Mali’s voice raised at the last sentence and Maddie laughed quietly.

Taking the bill from Mali, Maddie nodded her head and smiled. “Will do, Ms. Hood.”

“Oh, please,” Mali waved her hand in the air dismissively. “Call me Mali.” She extended her hand for Maddie to shake and she did so happily, happy that Mali wasn’t stand offish like she expected her to be since that’s how Calum acted when he first met Maddie. “Nice to meet you.”

“Yeah, you too, Mali.”

“Well, I’m off now!” Mali announced to her and Calum. “Bye baby bro! Bye Maddie.”

Maddie laughed and shook her head, making sure the ten dollar bill was in a secure place on her desk, not wanting to bother Calum with that just yet, as she got back to what she was doing.

◈◈◈

Calum bit his lip as he watched through his open office doors Maddie putting her coat on and clicking off the little light on her desk. She turned around, sending a quick text before telling Calum she was heading out for the night, but before she could speak, Calum did first. “Maddie,” Her head snapped up from her voice at the sound of his demanding and gruff voice. “Can you come here?”

“Am I in trouble?” Maddie asked just a sheepish smile, finally giving him the ten dollar bill that he rolled his eyes at, but accepted nonetheless.

“No, Maddie. You’re not in trouble.” Calum gestured to the chair she was standing next to. “Sit.”

“Okay.” Maddie mumbled nervously and sat down.

“So, every year there’s this banquet thing that, essentially, is to appreciate the publishing companies in New York, California, and Chicago, and it’s mandatory for me, but,” Calum ran his hand over the scruff on his jaw that certainly did not go unnoticed by Maddie, and leaned back in his chair. “I also am expected to bring my assistant.”

“Oh?” Maddie’s eyes widened.

“It’s just a few hours out of town and we would be taking a company car.” Calum further explained. “But, you don’t have to go, it’s not mandatory for you, but it would make me and the company look better if you did come with me.”

“Okay…” Maddie wasn’t sure where this was going.

“But, like I said, it’s not mandatory for you, so if you don’t feel comfortable with traveling and staying at a hotel out of town with me, I understand.”

“I’m confused.” Maddie admitted with an embarrassed laugh.“Why, uh, why wouldn’t I feel comfortable?”

“Well, you know, given everything that’s happened between us, I don’t expect you to be jumping at the chance.”

“Ca- Mr. Hood,” Maddie kept slipping up, almost accidentally calling him Calum and not Mr. Hood. She was going to have to stop that before a co-worker heard her call him by his first name when he made everybody else call him Mr. Hood. She knew the other employees would get the wrong idea. “That was a month ago. And we’ve talked about it, so I’m,” Maddie struggled to find the right words. “I don’t mind going. If it’s better for you and for the company- I’m there.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.” Maddie smiled to reassure him and he puffed out a breath of air, feeling the tension and unease leave his body at her words and her smile.

“Okay. Great.

“So, uh, when is this thing?”

“We’ll work a half day and leave Friday afternoon, around eleven, then leave early Sunday morning” Calum told her and she nodded her head in understanding. “But, you should get going before the sun goes all the way down, so we’ll talk more about it tomorrow. Get home safe, Madeline.”

“Yes, sir.”

Maddie flashed him one of her award winning smiles and walked out of his office, her heels clicking against the floor and her ass, looking perfect in her dress, swaying. Calum put his hand up to his face, biting his knuckles, and closed his eyes. He wasn’t sure how the trip would end.

◈◈◈

a/n: okay so i know that was uhhh kinda boring and short but ,,,, the next part with make up for it promise heeheheh

Taglist: @novacanecalum @roselukes @kinglyhood @cantbehandled-ever @hereforlukescruff @astroashtonio @monsteramongmikey @gosh-im-short @emma070900 @youmaycallmemrshemmings @cosmocalum @cakesunflower @asht0ns-world @singt0mecalum @lockthisheartinchains @cheyenne-in-wonderland @babyurart @blahehblah @inlovehoodx @softboycal @hopelessxcynic @ashtoniwir @calumsmermaid @curly-cal @callllumhood @rexorangecouny @kurtsflowergirl @cocktail-calum @lukewarmwoda @meganmisc @neonweeknds @kenopsia-falcon @blue-sunset-oreo-lover @foolishcal @ayee-style @itsmeempar @outofmylimitcal @mariellelovescupcakes-blog @post-traumatic-mess @damselindistressanu @tapolesarebabyturtles @noswagswag @scarapoison @sugarcoatedcalum @notsooperfect @trustmeimawhalebiologist @klb967 @littlebear1353 @cal-king @manicpanicbaby @colormekaykay @geeksareunique @nostalgia-luke @badguycal @all-i-want-is2b-loved-by-you @cuddlemecalx @mpadge33 @bitchinbabylon @wilsondanvers @it-was-a-lie

[reneereadskingdomofash]

Thoughts on the Ships in Kingdom of Ash

Ok, I’m writing some thoughts on the Ships in Kingdom of Ash. I’ve jumped onto a few posts, but I feel like I’m probably not being clear because well, I talk to people outside of those posts via different channels and so people aren’t getting the full picture. 

Not that this matters of course, the internet and tumblr is only a snapshot, but I wanted to write some clear thoughts on the Ships and how I am feeling about them before/during/and now two weeks after having finished the book. 1. perspectives change. 2. Reading other peoples thoughts that might enhance our own understanding happens too. **SPOILERS BELOW CUT**

Rowaelin

Before Koa: Yes, I dig it. Empire of Storms was their peak love story! Heir of Fire gave me all the Angst - love and hate, falling in love with the trainer, Queen of Shadows gave me my reunion and happiness to fight the bad guys and Empire of Storms gave me the sexy times. The Ship had sailed. Then Maeve came in Empire of Storms. And I was worried for my ship, but only because I was worried for the individual parts of the whole. What happens if they die! What happens if Aelin isn’t who she was. What happens to them! they deserve a happily ever after. *insert renee crying lots at the end of Empire of Storms* 

During Koa: I was scared. Aelin wasn’t who she was. Rowan was loosing himself in the hunt for her. What was this new thing between Fenrys and her and Rowan was on the outs? What did this mean? Why couldn't she talk? Where was my Aelin!!! Aelin had hardened and I was scared, and Rowan was scared and it made me think - she’s going to die and i’m going to cry. Then Aneille happened and Aelin almost came back. She was as close to the old Aelin as I think was possible given the trauma that she went through. Rowan didn’t care. He would have loved her anyway. Such a pure ship. And then they go on to save the world. Once Aelin had forged the lock, I wasn’t scared for her anymore. I didn’t think she might die, I didn’t think Rowan would either. The lock felt like it was the start of their happy ending. Sure lots of stuff to go on but the ship was good. 

After Koa: Same feelings. I still love Rowaelin. But I got to experience their journey over 4 books! It was satisfying in that they had page time but it didn't detract from the story. So When I’m not enthusiastic about Rowaelin - Its not because I don’t love them, I’ve just been with them a long time. There wasn’t any doubt in my mind that they would be ok. 

Elorcan (aka the ship I wanted to sail more than any other)

Before  Koa: I was scared. I feel so hard into this ship when I read Empire of Storms. And then when I re-read it before KoA I fell harder. I loved Lorcan from the start. A grumpy demi-fae, who is the most powerful, who seems angry, who doesn’t show emotions, who would do anything for his friends. (sure misguided sometimes - but that’s what it boils down to). He came to Rowan’s aid in Heir of Fire. He came for his friend. Not his general. He didn’t have time for Aelin - some mortal girl who people had an interest in. It wasn’t why he came. People who know me - know I have been cheering for Lorcan the past two years. That he’s going to show this side of himself. My morally grey Lorcan. And then Queen of Shadows and Empire of Storms happened. Oh man. Elide, my witch baby standing up for those who cant do it for themselves! She took on Vernon for Kaltain, she is bad-ass! She is the my love just as Lorcan is my love. I’m so torn I love them both. Its a good thing they found each other. Anyway. Elide stands up to him, she fights for herself and others. She protects him and he does the same back. So I love them. Elide threw herself in front of a wolf (Fenrys to save him!) And When Lorcan called for Maeve - my heart sank. Lorcan u big Dummy! I love you but come on! And then the theories started. and I wrote some too. Maybe if I think of the worst possible thing that can happen and put it out into the world it wont happen. Like jinxing the bad stuff. Lorcan “SALVATERRE” savior of lands- does that mean he will sacrifice himself??? Honestly my biggest fear going in. 

During  Koa: Kingdom of Ash was a roller-coaster for my ship. I was so invested in everything they did. I paid way too much attention to their sections than other ships. - honestly I skim read nestaq scenes (who I love). which is bad I know. but elorcan for life apparently.  And Lorcan was being sneaky and trying to help Elide be comfortable (sure more period talk but what ever) because he had been traveling with her for months and months and knew she needed stuff. He shows love by doing. Not always doing the right thing (his decision making skills need work) - but he tries. Elide was a bitch at the start. Just going to say it. Sure she might have been justified, but sometimes you don’t need to voice all the nasty things in your head. And I got mad at her. Then she basically said she wouldn’t care if Lorcan died. And his heart broke and my heart broke and I was upset and probably crying.  AND THEN THE BATTLE OF ANEILLE HAPPENED AND I CRIED!!! AND I SCREAMED AT MY BOOK. Direct quote from my notes: “ P500 - NOT HAPPY! Lorcan!!!! OMG NOT HAPPY! LORCAN JUST DROPPED HIS SHEILDS - fucking egg! Omg ahhh! Crap. Crap crap.”  I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t have dropped his shields if Elide hadn’t said such horrible things to him and he didn’t feel like he needed to die. So I was mad, fucking live you dork. Its just a girl! I ship you two, but if You are both going to be Dorks then I don’t!  So when Elide went to go find him I was like - OMG YES U DO LOVE HIM... direct quote from my notes:  “ I'm crying .... Elide- "I will always find you", running down the stairs... oh it hurts.... please please be ok ....  Ahhh she grabbed chaols horse! A horse for Hellas himself... ahh Lol and then that's explained a couple of pages over Lorcan!!!(517) "Get up" :sobbing emojis: "I promised to always find you. I promised you, and you promised me. I came for you because of it; I am here because of it. I am here for you, do you understand? And if we don't get onto that horse now, we won't stand a chance against that dam. We will die." P 520 :more sobbing emojis: Omg :more sobbing emojis: You have to let me go I love you And I will be with you.... I will be with you always :more sobbing emojis: Lorcan Omg Fucking hell And elide! Yes! You claw at him girl!! That dam! Oof Omg my ship - you are killing me “

Honestly. Such a Rollercoaster. So as you can see I was invested. and then they seemed to tentatively get over each other and what happened and proceeded to get cuter and cuter as the book went on and just gave me warm fuzzies and happiness. 

After Koa: I love this ship. I would die for this ship. Fight me! - oh majority of fandom also Like my ship now... cool cool. that’s cool. guess we cool.

Manorian

Before Koa: I dig it. Its alright. Manon eats men for breakfast so Dorian has a little bit of a death wish but I can see that playfulness, that bond from living a similar life. Heirs in name only, for the longest time. I appreciated it, but wasn't strongly invested. I had picked my OTP already. Still enjoy this ship tho - just less invested.

During Koa: I really liked the tentative relationship between Manon and Dorian. I have so many notes about how I think he is a witch tho - so those stand out in my notes more than ship points. I liked that they shared a tent when Manon never did. I liked that Dorian spent time with the 13 developing friendships. It showed that he wanted to know Manon, more than just for sex. But it also cannot be denied that they like sex and used it to avoid talking. That happens in relationships too - not necessarily bad. Its one of the things I actually like about SJM’s ships they aren’t cookie cutter relationships. But I did feel like both Manon and Dorian chose the mission over the relationship (For Now) which is fine too btw. In life we might take a job in a different city and do long distance and still come back to each other. I think Dorian lying to Manon on their last night together by omission is a little sucky. But again. relationships have ups and downs. I’m glad it kinda ended there. Sure they come back together, But I like that its left open. Firstly because they have had the ship burn in flames - their isn’t an “unhappy” ending... the story is still playing out. We just cut away before seeing the end. 

After Koa: Wow ok. So people have lots of thoughts on this ship and maybe I should have been paying attention. Why don’t people like it open ended... ok? maybe its a loose end but there is still a book to come (the world of throne of glass) and sure its not a novel about Aelin. This doesn't mean it wont tell us about the encyclopedic history or Ardarlan and the Witch kingdom and how both are run by people who are seeing each other. A certain boy who knows how to use portals to get from one place to the other quickly - doesn't seem like living on opposite sides on the continent is going to be a problem.... maybe that’s just the optimist in me. If they have children - a girl to rule the wastes and a boy to be king. Seems like an amazing fit. I’d really like to see this happen tbh, but this takes time and time KoA didn’t have in the pages - but - maybe - the world of throne of glass will.  

Chaorian

Before Koa: Ahh cute - they had their love story i’m happy!

During Koa: Damn I love Yrene. Shes the best. Chaol, you are ok too - but Yrene has your back and is the light relief in your life. Chaol you are too serious - listen to your wife.

After Koa: awwww little wittle chaorene babies. awwwwww daddy Chaol. awww  uncle Dorian. <3 <3 so many warm fuzzies.

Nestaq

Before Koa: I ship them so Hard OMG SARTAQ I LOVE YOU. You are a way better fit for Nesryn than Chaol. Man i’m glad she met you. 

During Koa: oof Sartaq why u gotta have a Khagan hat on - you are so serious. Good thing Borte is there. 

After Koa: Nesryn has no idea what she is in for - Can I please get more Yeran and Borte. Still love Nestaq - but I understand the peak of their story was in Tower of Dawn. 

Lysaedion

Before Koa: Oh Man you two. The end of Empire of Storms - Aedion you are a dick! Why! Why! Oh you better just be mad and make it up to her. You love her dang it, you wanted to marry her! Argh. I don’t know how to feel, I like them together - but what is this past Aedion has? What is coming. I don’t want to get my hopes up. 

During Koa: Aedion! Aedion! What! Are! you! doing!

I’m so mad at Aedion right now. You better apologise.

Its so complicated to break down. But basically Aedion is being an A-hole to Lysandra and she doesn’t deserve it. She is running herself into the ground and you do that! Aedion! I’m so conflicted, why are you a good dad to Evangeline but an awful person to Lys! AHHH AEDION STOP! 

After Koa: I still don’t know how to break down this relationship. It sets off so many red flags for me. - About how someone can be a great dad but an awful partner.  - About how someone can be abusive essentially but explain away their actions. - About how other people stand by and watch, when they see this behavior. - About how it is all “circumstances”. 

Now - I think its fine for people to work through things and overcome their problems if they want to but that takes time. What Aedion did in Kingdom of Ash did not make me think he should have been able to win Lysandra back as quickly as he did near the end of the book. And it hurts. However I know people in real life who have gone back to people who have treated them badly. So its not uncommon. It is their decision. It just hurts. 

Part of me wants them to get a divorce and I’ve made a couple of joke-ish statements about that. But I could have been on Lysaedion’s side if it had a similar ending to Manorian. If it was left hanging, left on a - lets see where this goes. War does strange things to people, and I think Aedion was affected more than others, but he needs to prove he isn’t going to be the man who threw Lysandra out into the cold. In my eyes at least. 

I have prob left ships out, and thoughts out but this is a lot of writing for me that’s not counting towards my nanowrimo - hahaha.