#you expect to coexist in this society and not allow people to contact you for shit?

[slippery-minghus]

OKAY i have fucking HAD IT with today. it's not even fucking 9am and i am alreADY fighting back a meltdown

[devanksan]

Fundamental Understanding of Body Language

Importance of knowing body language to avoid contradiction between what we say and what we do to increase the credibility

Body language is the first method of contact among humans. Since ancient times the body has been an irreplaceable instrument of communication before speech and written language.

We are permanently communicating and under the scrutiny of other people, even without conversing with them, during walking alone in the park, riding the subway, going to the university, etc. According to the body posture, the way of walking, and the expression of the face and hand movements, we can decipher the inner state of this person.

People observe our body language while communicates to others through gestures and movements, the thoughts, and emotions we are feeling at that moment. The body sends permanent messages to our brain, affecting our mood; therefore, if we assume an upright position, our mood improves immediately; if we take a stooped position, our mood decreases.

Being conscious of the significance of body language for a better coexistence in society improves social relations and helps build a better world; more humanistic, creative, empathetic, productive, where you can live and act in freedom.

Why is body language always a topic of discussion?

Man is a social being who constantly communicates with his environment to satisfy basic needs that allow him to stay alive, such as food, health, clothing, education, etc., and develop in society. It is challenging to live in isolation without communicating with each other.

In recent decades, there has been a significant trend in positive psychology in the study of body language and emotional intelligence. Previously, there are scholars to study negative emotions, now they have focused on the study of positive emotions of the individual, and the results have been surprising.

Scientific research has discovered that the key to human development and growth depends on people's mental state; their levels of satisfaction and happiness are directly related to creativity, production, and performance, based on the ability to communicate and interrelate with their environment.

Experts affirm that 93% of what we communicate, we do it through body language. If we cannot manage our emotions and maintain synchrony between thoughts, feelings, and words, our own body oversees contradicting what we say. This contradiction directly affects our credibility with others, with negative consequences for our personal and professional growth.

Why is body language important in a job interview?

Companies are concerned about choosing a professional with the right profile for what they are looking for, thus saving time, money and improving the company's conditions. The success in the selection of the candidate for a job is the success of the company. Thus, be mindful of every detail when communicating; a small oversight can provide an excellent opportunity for both parties.

An extraordinary resume is not enough; it must be strengthened with skills and personal characteristics, which can only evaluate during the interview. In the job interview, several elements are involved, and the body language adds credibility to the presentation speech.

From the moment you arrive at the company's physical headquarters that will conduct the interview, your evaluation starts from the manner of dress, verbal, and body language. In these moments, special attention and focus on the gestures that accompany the word and express the emotional states that the person experiences in those moments.

With technology, some companies implement strategies that allow you to observe the job candidate online or in the waiting room before the interview. This technique will enable you to observe behaviors that indicate insecurity, stress, or anxiety. The candidate could be monitored and evaluated, his presentation, punctuality, and behavior. The interviewer accomplishes this observation through observation and a practical understanding of body language.

The employer knows your resume, which demonstrates strengths and skills. The interview seeks to discover and evaluate your personal ability to meet the different challenges within the organization successfully.

Inappropriate language can send the wrong signals and impoverish the interviewer's perception of you. You should not only take care of your physical appearance, but it is also essential to take care of the way you carry yourself.

Your verbal answers may be flawless, but if your body language shows signs of nervousness, insecurity, fears, it can negatively affect your chances of getting the job of your dreams.

Through body language, the interviewer discovers your level of security, optimism, and self-control, which, added to your physical presentation and resume, increases your chances of being hired.

It is fundamental to handle the presentation speech, workings on ourselves to control emotions expressed through body language, and while we communicate through speech, our own body can give us away.

Insecurity produces fears; uncontrolled nerves manifest through unconscious and involuntary actions that send signals to our interlocutor (sweating, nervous tics, involuntary body movements, etc.); you can only correct this with the effective management of our emotions.

What to do before going to a job interview?

There is only one chance to make a good impression, first, prepare your image.

Take some time to choose what to wear. Find out what style identifies the company, dress appropriately

Prepare to rehearse, applying self-analysis, following what's in the resume

Get information about the company and the products it offers

Look for information about the job position offered by the company; this practice denotes interest. It is a plus

Decorate the answers to possible questions, turning weak points into strong points, arguing intelligently

Get examples in your career where you demonstrate behaviors that highlight your virtues to convince your interlocutor

Research body language by practicing in front of the mirror or ask a good friend for an opinion on your performance

Evaluate possible questions and possible answers for greater security.

Sleep 8 hours a day and eat properly

How does the interviewer define your personality traits in 30 minutes to 1-hour interview?

In an interview, the language is the protagonist; from the first minute, the evaluation begins. Between 30 minutes and 1 hour, the interviewer will try to discover personality traits that will ensure success in the performance of the position to be filled within the business organization.

The interviewer will ask a sequence of questions to find out if you are qualified for the position within the company.

The answers and your body language will let the interviewer know if you are lying if you are honest and if you feel comfortable in specific elements such as:

Goals in life and work

Expectations about the job

Availability

Commitment

Skills

Defects

Virtues

What would you be willing to do?

Why were you interested in the company?

Most little satisfying moments

Others

Experts say that 90% of communication in an interview is done through body language. Reflect on your thoughts, feelings, fears, and difficulties. Prepare yourself internally and externally for the interview. Believe in yourself, respond naturally, take on new challenges a priori, show confidence and say, yes, I can do it.

5 Negative body language to watch out for

These are some of the body behaviors, which send negative signals to our interlocutors:

Walking posture

Body posture requires a specific body movement. A person who walks hunched does not have agile and energetic steps; a person with an assertive stance does not walk timidly

Walking hunched over, with shoulders forward and chin down, shows low self-esteem, frustration, and motivation

Shuffling feet can be perceived as a sluggish or sick person who is hostile to the company

Arms drooping without balance; shows the attitude of an unmotivated person who does not value himself and does not give value to what surrounds him

Correct posture

Back straight, shoulders back, chin up, this is an assertive posture that covers a larger vital space and increases positive energies. This posture makes us look capable, self-confident, and highly motivated.

Face

To show a face without expressions, with an elusive look, that wanders and cannot remain fixed in front of the interlocutor; generates distrust and disinterest

The cold aspect of facial expressions, the absence of wrinkles on the forehead and eyes that occur when we are surprised or happy, is unfriendly to others and shows anger, dissatisfaction

Lack of smiling; is interpreted as a sign of dissatisfaction and unhappiness, and the person interviewed may be perceived as inaccessible and complicated

Looking over the shoulder of the interlocutor shows arrogance, contempt, unfriendliness to others

Correct facial expression

Maintain eye contact without exaggerating

Smile: it allows open communication. It denotes kindness, understanding, and joy, ideal to start a conversation

The look: it can express different emotions; the most crucial job interview should be interesting. The eyebrows accompany the look. The person, who shows interest, keeps the eyebrows fixed and the gaze, observing the interviewer, taking minor detours to refresh

In the face of emotions of astonishment and surprise, they are raised, and the eyes are enlarged

Pupils open wide

Before emotions of joy, the eyes accompany the smile, closing a little and producing small wrinkles on the sides

Hands

Shaking hands is a good start, but you must know how to do it. It should not be strong, nor so weak; it should be firm and show confidence, looking into the person's eyes doing the interview

A weak handshake projects an unreliable and unenthusiastic impression. Shaking hands that are sweaty and shaky shows insecurity; you don't believe in yourself

Avoid touching only your fingers or squeezing the other person's hand. It can lead to misunderstandings

Fingers wringing during the interview denotes anxiety

Hide your hands; it is the worst idea you can have

Experts in body language recommend in these moments of anxiety, while listening to our interlocutor, to join the tips of the fingers without joining the palms

Keeping your hands inside your pants (men) denotes that you are oblivious and uninterested in the topic of conversation

Putting your arms across is a sign of a blockage, denial in communication

Throwing your hands with force is a sign of a defiant attitude

Avoid pointing fingers; it is a sign of accusation

Positive gestures

Generally used as a technique to order thoughts, establish references, and remember correctly.

Keep hands visible and make firm, confident movements when speaking (without exaggeration)

Open hands upwards; it is a sign of honesty; it means that you are not hiding anything

Open your hands sideways and show an open attitude.

Control involuntary hand movements

Uncontrolled movements

Unconsciously during an interview, presentation, or simply when talking to another person, our body may be making movements that denote nervousness. These movements can be.

Touching the hair

Frequent touching of the face

Twisting hands

Illogical movements in the chair

Tapping your foot on the floor

Twisting your tie

Pulling at the hem of your dress

Scratching your neck, ear, etc

These involuntary movements being extremely distracting and show that you lack confidence.

What can you do to control these behaviors?

Mindfulness concentration and breathing exercises help keep emotions in balance and improve the perception of reality; increasing optimism and positive thoughts help focus on the present time, reducing stress and anxiety levels.

Yoga is also an excellent help for concentration, body stretching, and relaxation.

These exercises facilitate communication with our inner self, helping us get to know ourselves better, removing fears, and removing mental blocks.

Silence and voice

Very long moments of pause show disinterest, boredom, and lack of knowledge of the subject

Speaking in a shallow tone of voice, almost inaudible, is a sign of fear and shyness

Talking with shouting; denotes arrogance and disrespect towards the other person

The appropriate tone of voice

· According to Albert Mehrabian, the tone of voice accentuates 38% of the message to be transmitted. Intonation and paralinguistic elements should continuously feed the harmonious circle of communication.

· Break the silence and try to ask open questions.

· Use a tone of voice according to the emphasis you want to give when speaking. Maintain the rhythm and avoid crutches.

· If for any cause the interviewer raises his voice, use a very soft and low tone of voice, and lean slightly toward him, being careful not to invade his space. "No need to shout..."

Tips for Impressed with your body language.

People who have difficulty communicating fluently and serenely generally convey insecurity and rejection. Some psychological tricks can help you relax and make a good impression.

Here are a few:

Assign yourself the value you have

Boost your self-esteem

Arrive on time to avoid anxiety and stress about being late. Arrive 5 minutes early or more

Dress appropriately for your surroundings; suit and tie (men) and discreet dress (women). Display an image, which reflects good grooming

Try to show a positive image. Our interlocutor consciously and unconsciously interprets the message that our body sends

Maintain eye contact, naturally

Smile from time to time without exaggerating

Wait for an indication to approach; if it is the case, shake hands vertically and firmly; avoid exerting force

Wait to be invited to sit down

If you are carrying an umbrella, raincoat, or another object in your hands, ask permission and place it to one side. Avoid sitting with things on you. Maintain an upright posture

Not to address the interviewer by their first name unless requested by the interviewer

Listen carefully

Highlight positive aspects of your background

Take your time and reflect before answering "dangerous" questions

Be motivated and interested in joining the company

Avoid invading the interviewer's space. Example: Remove your resume to verify a date. Admit that you don't remember it

Show yourself willing to take responsibility

An increase in the number of movements of the interviewer indicates that the interview is about to end

Chair movements and changes of position

Movement of documents

Wait for the interviewer to rise and then extend your hand in farewell

Say goodbye politely and express gratitude

The best strategy for attending a job interview should be based on self-confidence. Act naturally, without forcing the situation, as if you were talking to your best friend. Clarify doubts, empower yourself with knowledge and seek support from people who know the job position within the company and believe in you; that you are capable of successfully performing a task within the organization are the primary tools for success in a job interview.

By: Devan Ksan

You can consider to read short ebook with entry price by Darth Olsson Amazon ebook store: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09B5JDDPW

[trixter-i-am]

On International Nonbinary Day, I’m sharing my personal story of embracing my androgyny.

For me, being non-binary means allowing myself to go beyond the frames I don’t fit into, both according to others’ views and by my own choice. And nonbinary visibility is what helps me understand that I'm normal, to come to terms with myself. It helped me realize that I'm not some sort of a bizarre creature, nor a comedy character, nor an unfortunate exception to the rule. I'm a person, like anyone else. A person who is perfectly aware of all the features of their own personality and looks to break free from conventional stereotypes.

Finally, I can be completely free to tell myself that no, I don’t have to stick to labels. I'm not bound to tropes and stereotypes. I can be more than a "masculine lesbian" , a "strong female character" that doesn’t conform, a "campy gay guy" or a "pretentious metrosexual". All these qualities might as well coexist together within me without any conflict, because why would I conflict with my own character traits and the way I live?

The most beautiful thing is that I am who I am. I don’t have to choose among all my unique features. I'm the whole package and that’s what makes me the person who I am, more so than a name or gender assigned to me at birth.

How long had I been thinking that I never wanted to be a girl, to do the things girls do, to act the way most of my peers or adult women did. And at the same time, I hated the idea of becoming a man when I started thinking that I could be a transgender man. At first, I hated myself for the fact that I would never be able to live as a fully functioning man and have sex like cisgender people do. Yet when I imagined myself with a male body, I realized that I didn’t want to live my entire life in that body. I understood that I didn’t want to be a hundred percent man. I knew there were androgynous people, but at that time, the society was so far away from tolerating homosexuality, not to speak of accepting binary transgender people. And for the most part, people around me didn’t seem to have enough emotional intelligence to not treat me as a threat or a broken cog in the system.

Needless to say my desire to use male pronouns for myself wasn’t taken seriously. I looked at myself in the mirror and I saw it, my curvaceous body, sexually appealing by traditional beauty standards, my “pretty” face features, and I was disappointed in myself. I believed that no one would ever perceive me as androgynous, nor as a boy, nor as anyone other than just female body parts. So I tried to socialize as a woman, to make use of this female body of mine, and only allowed myself to be in my natural state when I was at home or with my partners. Some might say, don’t be too soft, everyone does that. Everyone gives in to the rules of this world, everyone wears masks and only let themselves relax when they’re at home. Yet I doubt many people have to play the roles that feel so alien and hated. Even though these roles might have seemed easy at first, since others succeeded.

This incompleteness, this humiliating role, having to be someone I already hated were making it even worse. I didn’t want to go outside, my inner aggression and self-hatred grew inside me tearing me apart. I hated myself and everything I was doing. Everyday, I dreamed of not waking up. Besides, people felt that I was a so-so woman, a strange woman, a woman who doesn’t want to understand what other women do, and doesn’t behave naturally. They saw through me immediately. Well, I know myself that I wasn’t able to get over my feelings to an extent where I could always be comfortable with female pronouns, expectations society keeps putting on women, my female pseudonym and the attitude to myself in general.Everything related to female gender roles was so unnatural to me that it irritated and disgusted me.

When it all went too far, I wasn’t even able to leave home. I was anxious about people not taking me seriously, deeming me insane for using male pronouns while not looking as a bulky masculine man, blaming it all on fanfiction or something like that. Sometimes, I thought the same way, too. I’ve heard them say anyone can live their life normally, settle down, even change their sexual orientation after playing around in their younger ages. They just grow over it, people said. Why wouldn’t I try to pretend that I’m the same? After all, it’s what should make other people around me happy. I started imagining myself starting a heteronormative family, or maybe a lesbian one, and I knew that was it. The best way to dig my own grave and bury myself alive. Childbirth sounded like a sentence. I would never do that to my body, I would never put everything away for the sake of becoming a living incubator. Then, I started imagining living in a male body and all those surgeries to remove body parts or construct an artificial, insensitive penis. Or facial hair growth procedures. I knew for sure that I didn’t want to be a man. I wouldn’t even want to be born as a man. Men’s life experiences are just as far from a fairy tale as female ones.

And yet I knew I wanted to live in-between, break away from being a woman without becoming a man completely. What is that even supposed to be? Is it even possible? Can one survive in this society with such paradigm of thought? Nope, I believed, I must be crazy for sure. And if I’m crazy, if they deem me crazy, then the future holds nothing good for me. What kind of creature am I, not being able to understand who I am, to find a place I belong, to fit in anywhere?

One day, a friend of mine told me they write about people like me on the internet. That such things, have a name and one can say for sure that I’m not crazy. That my identity is one of transgender identities. Moreover, the world wants to know more about nonbinary people, which means there is a chance to be heard, not to be crushed by society, and it’s even possible to embrace the gender you identify with yourself, rather than trying to hide it and get into someone else’s skin. Thanks to the visibility of other nonbinary people, I was able to understand that I no longer had to swing between the two extremes and make painful choices. To tell the truth, I had already stopped trying by that time and lived my life stuck in endless depression, without contact with the world outside, without leaving home. I was sure people like me would never survive and fulfil themselves in a binary world.

When I realized that my androgyny wasn’t just a figment of my imagination but that I could and should always stay true to myself, I set off on my journey to a new life. I started developing my style the way I had always envisioned it, I started becoming myself. Each day, each month, each year I was getting closer to being myself, to finding my place and my voice in society.I managed to step into the light and speak out about who I am and what I want. I stopped being afraid of myself. We’re few in number, but I know for sure that I’m not alone in this world.

[veridium]

“Marry Me” pt. 2 (Cass x Olivia)

Hey, so, I know I left the “Marry Me” fic on a cliff-hanger, so, here’s how the rest of that episode goes (brace thyself):

--

Olivia's body froze, and Cassandra could feel the sudden rigidity of her body underneath her. Opening her eyes, she realized then that she had been inadvertently seduced into divulging something she had been thinking about for months, but never quite had the gumption to bring up. Their lives had been whirlwinds of change and responsibility, and every time the thought process was catalyzed in her mind, she had convinced herself it was nothing but a romantic heart's whimsical nature. Now that she had spoken it into the air, and with Olivia present, she knew it was more than that.

Olivia pulled away, laying her head back down on the pillow. Her brows were furrowed, framing an expression of confusion. "What?"

Cassandra loosened her grip on her, and closed her eyes. She was feeling the embarrassment well in her stomach.

"I meant...well, I..." Feeling Olivia's eyes on her, she cracked. "Forgive me, I was engrossed in the moment." Surrendering to her own mistake, she broke away from Olivia's embrace, and rolled back onto her designated side of the bed. Methodically, she rose to her feet, making her way over to where her clothes had been strewn across the floor. She didn't care if they were dirty, she needed to recover and move on from this moment if it killed her.

From the bed, Olivia watched as the woman she had eating out of her proverbial hand suddenly whisked herself out of her hold and out of bed. It was happening so fast and without any sense, something she didn't expect from Cassandra of all people.

"Cassandra," she said, rising to sit on her folded legs again, adjusting the disheveled nature of her night dress, "are you sure?"

"Yes, I am sure," Cassandra grumbled back as she slipped into her small clothes. "It was the romanticism of a foolish woman, tired and spread thin."

"Love, you would lie to me, here, with no witnesses and no reason to?" Olivia reckoned with her, crawling towards the edge of the bed so that she, too, could stand on her own feet.

Cassandra kept herself turned away from her as she felt her encroaching on her reclaimed space. The butterflies in her stomach were seeming to soar with reckless abandon, knowing that she wasn't going to get out of this one as easily as she wished. Olivia was never one to have the wool pulled over her eyes -- just because she was sweet, didn't mean she was daft. Cassandra of all people understood such truths, even as she wished to cover her ass.

"I..." she stopped what she was doing, holding her coat in her busied hands, "I am really in no mood to be teased or interrogated. I am quite...tired," she struggled to compose herself. Olivia at last arrived at her side, and she rest her hand on Cassandra's stiff forearm, beckoning her to slow her road a little.

"My darling," Olivia put her other hand to Cassandra's face, inviting her to look back at her finally. "Don't turn from me. Please, I could not bear it."

In her golden irises, Cassandra saw the essence of Olivia's spirit: her kindness and openness, and it enticed her to bear her soul.

"Olivia, I..." her gaze flickered down to the coat she held in her hand. She reached and set it down on the nearby table, before turning her full attention to her lover. Her hands collected Olivia's, and she held them between their bodies. "I know you are not one for such things, especially given your upbringing. You know me, I am a traditionalist, and a romantic. I have fantasized beyond the reality of our relationship past the point I should have, without consulting with you. However, I...I cannot lie and say I do not wish it."

Olivia listened to her, taking care not to let any one extreme emotion show on her face. She understood the brevity of Cassandra's vulnerability enough to stave off a reaction whilst she opened her heart.

"I...I admit I am taken aback," she began, looking off to the side for a moment whilst she collected her thoughts. "I suppose I just assumed you would not conceive of such a thing given who I am, and what I do."

Cassandra shook her head. "My Love, there is nothing about you that would deter me from wanting to be unified with you forever."

"No? So, you would conjoin you soul to that of a Mage, a Mage known for her radical politics, a Mage who cannot promise such things as to be your homemaker, your live-in wife, whilst you take on the world's evils?" Olivia's lips remained parted as she maintained eye contact with her. Her qualms were sincere, and they exposed the truth of Olivia's heart: she had contemplated such futurities, contrary to her staunch opinions on marriage and family goals. That inkling of incongruity gave Cassandra some hope.

Cassandra couldn't resist being endeared by Olivia's words. "You think I fell for you because I saw the potential in you to be any of those things? Olivia, have you met yourself?"

"Well, I have, actually, which is why I am concerned as to your request. You have to admit it is quite an unbelievable jump. You are considered one of the most solemn, devout women across the Empires. Your name is fast becoming legend. Surely, such a stature would require the subordination of a spouse."

Cassandra's brow furrowed, hearing her reputation and heroism be invoked in order to justify Olivia's hesitance. It was quite unlike the woman she loved to be intimidated by political clout.

"And you, Olivia? A veteran of the Mage Rebellion, Temptress-turned-Scholar, and one of the first head Mistresses within the hierarchy of the College of Enchanters? Best friend and ally to the Lady Inquisitor? Am I to assume all of this is just child's play or rumor?"

"You know what I meant, Cassandra. Or, should I also mention, your Highness, Princess of Nevarra?"

"Ugh, do not start with that," Cassandra rolled her eyes, stepping back.

Olivia watched her posture change and knew immediately that an argument was on the wings depending on how she conducted her next few steps. Cassandra's heritage and family were always ample kindling for conflict. Adding some space, she stepped back as well, starting to pace the floor with her arms lightly folding against her chest.

"I'm just timid about the whole thing, is all. I apologize," Olivia curtailed her own stubborn temper. "I just worry that it will change the way we are now. The way we have always been. There is nothing I would change about us: we are leading the lives in accordance with our skills and duties to Thedas, to our own virtues. Marriage is....marriage is a consumption of time and resources. It changes things."

Cassandra leaned onto one hip as she watched her woman pace, both physically and mentally.

"The reason why I wish to marry you is precisely because of that, my Love. I want to have this, to have you, for the rest of my days. Marriage is not always a prison, or a social contract for the pompous nobility to continue accruing gross amounts of wealth for trivial tastes. It can be a wonderful, spiritual act. I want to share that with you, and share my life with you."

"There is no reason why we cannot share our lives together as they are. Marriage is superficial in nature, it cannot possibly speak to the depth and complexity of a true bond. It was conceived of and perpetuated by a society and not a spiritual imagination, Cassandra. I know, I was groomed for it since I was able to walk and talk."

"Surely, the woman I know you to be, with her ability to synthesize and understand multitudes of coexisting truths and possibilities, would not be resigned to such a gross oversimplification."

"I am a woman who has no patience for orchestrated contracts insisted under the guise of love, when love is anything but that which Marriage enforces."

"So what is love, then, if you have such a universal apprehension of it?" Cassandra's tone was fast becoming angrier, her ego and her faith both taking on bruising from Olivia's stubborn and curt argument.

Olivia sighed roughly, running her hands through her tangled hair. The air from the balcony attached to her bedchamber allowing an uptick in wind consume the space between them. She felt the slight chill, and it graded on her already agitated nerves. She put her hand to her cheek and faced Cassandra once more.

"You just don't understand. You don't understand how vital it is to me, to have the life I have wanted for myself -- the independence, the freedom to pursue my passions, and the security of having my own home -- and know that I accomplished it on my own. Marriage used to be the only way I thought I'd have any of this. Now, I am defying everything my childhood taught me. You would have me bend back and relapse into a doctrine that was responsible for my confinement and sheltered misery."

Cassandra felt her gut flip, then. Olivia had rarely opened up about what marriage and family meant to her, but when she did it was always a brush off or a light, humorous facade. Now, they were getting to the root of her true feelings, and suddenly she felt as though she had assumed too much.

"Olivia, it was never my intention to force you into contradicting your beliefs and your ambitions. As I said before, it was a fantasy that I fed for too long."

"But you felt it nonetheless, and you stifled it. I know that must have been because you felt unwelcome in expressing it."

"Yes, but, everyone feels that way. A proposal is not exactly a casual concern."

Olivia turned her back to her as she put her face in her hand. "Ugh, if only I had known. If only I could have just put two and two together and foreseen that you would be endeared by such things. Perhaps in my naive lovesick stupor I believed that you could want me and only me and be satisfied. Now I know the truth. There will always be a caveat to this, even if we are happy and pleasant together. You will always be halted a step before the place you want to be."

Cassandra could hear her spiraling in her mind's eye; the emotions in her voice were palpable. In an instant, her prerogative shifted from getting her way, to making Olivia feel calm again. At once she made her way to her, grabbing her shoulders from behind and gently gripping. She pulled Olivia back a half-step until she was up against her, and she put her mouth to the back of her head. She kissed her hair, not needing to know what her face looked like or the full truth of her feelings.

"Olivia," she rubbed her arms slowly, "the only caveat to this is that if I lost you, marriage or no marriage, my spirit would break in half."

The room grew quiet. Olivia's heart was humbled, then, at her lover's admonition. Her nerves were scaling heights of possibilities and concerns before she even had the chance to come to a consensus with her: the thought of never making her truly happy, or being the woman that could suffice her dreams. Olivia was always on a tightrope in her mind, balancing all the goals and needs of herself and the people around her. Some things never changed, but evolved with higher stakes.

Still, it was Cassandra's heartfelt and unbending devotion that called her back down from the dreadful limitlessness of her anxiety. She rolled her eyes closed and leaned back against her, signaling to Cassandra that she wasn't lost to her forever.

"Cassandra, my Love," she turned to face her, which slightly surprised Cassandra, but she nonetheless welcomed her face again. She stared down at her in quiet, respectful expectation; her hands moving down to secure themselves around her waist. Olivia paused, taking a breath, before she continued her response:

"I would do unspeakable things for you. I would crack any formula, master any elixir or potion or explosive substance. I would find a way to defeat and obliterate darkspawn, demons, lyrium-infested creatures big and small. I would topple the entire Capitol down to rubble and ash. I would scour the ends of the Earth and all the Empires, leaving no sight unseen. I would find every last malevolent being in existence and with nothing but a dull blade and the feeble magic in my hands, I would fight them one after the other. I would storm any fortress or castle and have every last person and inch of it at the mercy of my wrath. I would smile in the face of death and demand a fight. There is nothing in this life that I would not do with the utmost cordiality and dedication. You have bound my blood and bones to you, and every inch of muscle and sinew in me relies upon your love like the shore is defined by the sea that crashes against it."

Cassandra listened to her, but her heart couldn't stop skipping beats. As if she was capable of such things, her eyes began tor redden with tears. Nothing, no book, no sonnet, no devotional from the Chantry's writings compared to the experience of hearing Olivia bear every aching inch of her heart for her. Such things made her believe in a higher power; such things convinced her that religion was just as much about love as it was piety.

She let out a breath, and followed up with a succinct, bittersweet conclusion. "But...you will not be my wife."

Olivia pursed her lips, her eyes flickering between Cassandra's eyes and lips. Seeing the emotions in her eyes tore at her heart and will.

"If...if that is what you want, more than anything. If you truly wish it, I will do it."

Cassandra's stomach felt as though it had sank through the floor. Immediately, her eyes lit up with shock, and she looked up to see the hesitance in Olivia's face. Was that it? Was she convinced? Or was this her making the ultimate sacrifice of her scruples in order to see Cassandra happy? The Seeker was many things, but she was not insensitive to such things. Her eyes narrowed as she tried to ascertain the truth of her consent. If it could be called consent, for one.

"Olivia, are you just saying that to please me?"

Olivia swallowed stiffly, but didn't blink. "I have just told you that nothing is impossible to me if it meant ensuring your safety and happiness. If marriage is your request in the face of that, to deny it would be a betrayal of my word."

"Olivia."

"No, I mean this. If this is something you truly desire, I will make it reality for you."

Cassandra stopped the tide of the concession before it could consume the entire conversation. At once, she put her hands on either side of Olivia's face, gently cupping her cheeks and jawline with the utmost fervor and passion in her body.

"Olivia, you seem to forget that I am also invested in your happiness and security. It is my responsibility as your lover and partner to be invested in such things. I know I am stubborn and insistent with my wishes and opinions, but you should never for one minute of one day believe that they are more vital to me than your welfare. You forget that marriage has been enforced upon me as a way to legitimacy in life. I know of what you speak, and I know of what I have asked. But, if you think that I would contemplate forcing you into an arrangement that goes against all of who you are, then you have forgotten the promises I made to you as you have made to me. You are the love of my life, and no one could ever hope to hold a candle to you. I would rather have a day with you, with no wedding vow in sight, than a lifetime with anyone else."

A solitary tear fell from Olivia's eye as she looked at her, and in that moment she knew she had walked into the fire and survived. She had been ready to agree to it, if Cassandra would have pushed enough; though, it would not have been what she wanted, and it would have been a most heartbreaking betrayal of her trust. Knowing that Cassandra would not let her fall on the proverbial sword affirmed to her completely and totally that Cassandra was the one for her.

"Thank you," she said with a brittle tone.

Cassandra grinned, and touched her forehead to hers. It was a short-lived embrace, for as soon as she could think to do it, Olivia kissed her. She kissed her deeply, reverently, rejoicing in being accepted for who she was and what her limits were.

If Marriage were ever an applicable reality to her life, Olivia knew she would never life to be tied to anyone but her. She had seen too many sham marriages built on wealth and stature to respect the idea or the word, her parents' union being one of them; but, this, this was deserving of her tireless dedication. This was the real thing, and she would never, ever let go.

[randomactuallywrites-57]

Paint the World (The Way it Should Be)

Title: Paint the World (The Way it Should Be) Author: randomwriter57 Rating: G Word Count: 2,291 Event + Prompt: @sormikweek day four - Pendrago: Loss/Protection Summary: Everything is in place. Well, except for one thing. Notes: I decided to write a kind of role-reversal fic wherein Mikleo is a human and Sorey is a seraph. Society in this fic is a little bit different here - the main important thing is that all people can see seraphim. I’ve put together a doc of notes if you want to see some of the other background/worldbuilding I did when writing this. I’ve pasted the link at the end too, in case you’d rather read it after the fic itself. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this one!

Also on: AO3

Everything is in place.

Mikleo gives the items on the table a final glance-over, but it isn’t necessary. He’s checked a thousand times; he could draw this table and its contents from memory at this point. After so long, he has everything he needs.

(Well, except for one thing.

Or rather, one person.)

To any other human, the array of items on the table might seem strange, and maybe a little bit shocking. But to Mikleo, every piece makes sense. Everything has its place, and its purpose.

Satisfied, he heads through to the kitchen, where the plate and cutlery he used an hour ago still needs to be washed. With a sigh, he pulls out a pack of matches and gets to work lighting the stove. He’s gotten pretty good at it, now - he doesn’t even catch his fingers with the flame this time. Once the stove is alight, he sets a kettle filled with water on top of it, and sits down to wait.

There’s not much else he can do, after all.

All his books lie with his clothes and some other knick-knacks in the biggest bag he could find in his tiny shared home, too deep in storage for him to dig out. His conscience reminds him of the small pile of paperwork on his desk which he could be preparing to submit, but he stops himself. There’s no need for him to complete it now, after all.

Mikleo’s never really been good at being idle. He always prefers having a purpose.

(Starting tomorrow, hopefully that won’t be a problem.)

He’s debating doing a thousand-and-first mental inventory of the table in the living room when the front door creaks open, quietly thudding in the frame.

“I’m home!”

Not a moment passes before Mikleo is out of his chair, already in the hallway before the newcomer can move from the door, let alone remove his thick travelling cloak and bags. Still, the newcomer’s face splits into a smile filled with love.

“Welcome home, Sorey,” says Mikleo, his own lips curving into a matching smile.

Sorey steps forward, connecting their smiles in a gentle kiss which Mikleo easily reciprocates, tilting his chin upward for better access. When they part, Mikleo takes a step back, allowing Sorey room to remove his cloak and bags.

“Sorry I took so long,” Sorey says, leaving his bags on the floor by the door. It’s not a sure sign that he isn’t staying long, but Mikleo wouldn’t be surprised if that is the case. “They were harder to track down than I expected.”

“Well, they are travelling merchants.” Mikleo watches as he removes his cloak, hanging it on the peg beside Mikleo’s own, a matching pair. His long ponytail tumbles from where it had been held inside the hood, falling into its natural end at the small of his back. In the dim light of the hallway, the golden-white hue shines with its own luminescence.

It’s a shame, that he has to hide it in public.

“That they are.” Sorey moves on to shucking off his boots, using Mikleo’s shoulder to prop himself up as he does. “I found them eventually, so it’s all good.”

A hint of jealousy pings within Mikleo’s heart, but he ignores it. If he lets it grow, it will only bring chaos. “Are you hungry?”

Had Sorey been human, his stomach may have growled in response. Instead, he meets Mikleo’s eyes and nods fervently. “What’s for dinner?”

“Leftovers from the past week. Take your pick.”

Sorey recognises the jab and lets go of Mikleo’s shoulder in favour of giving him a teasing push. “C’mon, I apologised already, didn’t I?”

“I know. I just haven’t figured out how not to cook for two, yet.” In his mind he adds, ‘And I’m hoping I’ll never have to.’

“I’m not complaining, if it means I get to eat your cooking when I come home!”

Mikleo rolls his eyes, turning to lead the way to the kitchen. The kettle is still heating up, the water slowly reaching higher temperatures. He ignores it in favour of opening the pantry, letting Sorey see the leftovers piled up from the previous week.

Letting out a low whistle, Sorey kneels down to look at the bottom shelves, pulling out various boxes until he finally comes across something he wants to eat. As he does this, Mikleo lights another ring on the stove, readying a pan so he can heat up the leftovers.

“It’s times like these when I wish I was a fire seraph,” Sorey says, watching him pour leftover curry into the pan. “Cooking would be so much quicker.”

“Being able to produce your own fire doesn’t make cooking times any faster.” Mikleo glances at him through the corner of his eyes. “Besides, lightning suits you far better.”

As Mikleo picks up a spoon to stir Sorey’s food, he feels arms curl around his waist, and a head rest on his shoulder. Warm lips find his jawline, pressing a few lingering kisses to it. He leans into the contact. It’s at times like these when he remembers just how much Sorey has a penchant for physical contact.

“How was your trip?” he asks eventually, determined not to fall asleep in this comfortable position.

Sorey pauses in his kisses to answer. “It was good! The seraph with the merchants was completely different from what I expected, though.”

“Really?”

“Mhm. His teeth were all pointy, and he scowled a lot.”

“Sounds friendly.”

“He agreed, though.” Sorey smiles into Mikleo’s shoulder. “He said he’d join the cause.”

Mikleo turns his head and nudges Sorey until their lips meet, a little clumsy from this angle. “Good job.”

“Thanks.” Sorey chases his lips, but Mikleo turns back to face the stove.

“If you don’t want your food burnt, you should probably stop distracting me.”

“You know you love it.” Still, with only one more chaste kiss to his cheek, Sorey backs off, taking a seat at the kitchen table. “But yeah, he and the merchants all want to help out. Isn’t that awesome?”

It really is. It’s revolutionary, in fact - humans and seraphim working together towards freedom. The whole Glenwood continent, uniting no matter their race or nationality.

This has been their dream for as long as Mikleo can remember. And now, it is becoming a reality.

But it’s not enough, to watch it happen from the sidelines.

“How have things been for you?” Sorey asks, unaware of Mikleo’s change in thoughts. “No one has been harassing you, have they?”

“No one suspects anything, if that’s what you’re asking.” Mikleo stirs the curry, watching bubbles begin to appear when he leaves the spoon still. “Everything is the same as ever. Nothing ever changes in that place.”

“I suppose it is the palace,” Sorey says, shrugging. “They have rules for how things work, right?”

“It’s not just the rules, though. The people never change. Their talk never changes.” Mikleo feels his annoyance bubbling up and tries to quell it. It would do no good for him to become angry about this.

Sorey senses the change in atmosphere. In a gentler tone, he says, “They’ll understand eventually.”

“Maybe so, but their opinions won’t change.”

The water in the kettle simmers, bubbles popping against the metal.

“Mikleo, what are you trying to say?”

“The same thing as I’m always trying to say.” Mikleo removes the pan of curry from the stove, extinguishing the flame before he forgets. Once that’s done, he pours the curry into a bowl and puts it on the table in front of Sorey, taking the other seat at the table, across from him. “Working there isn’t doing a thing.”

“You’re working to change things from the inside. Just being in that position gives us an advantage if we need to do anything drastic,” Sorey says. “I know you haven’t forgotten that.”

“Perhaps, but there’s no way I can bring up the subject of human and seraphim coexisting without revealing myself as a traitor. You and I both know that working in the palace can either be a safety blanket or a death sentence.”

Sorey sighs, looking down at the untouched bowl of curry. They’ve had this argument plenty of times before, and Mikleo knows he’s tired of it. They both are. But it’s necessary, especially now.

“I vowed to protect you,” Sorey says. “If you travel with me, you’ll only be in danger. Even being here with me now is dangerous-”

“And you think I care about that?” Mikleo hears his words growing in volume. Still, he cannot stop the threads of anger lacing his words. “Did I not vow to protect you, too? The promise we made that night was not one-sided.”

“Even by letting me live here you’re protecting me,” Sorey says.

“It’s natural for you to stay here, though! I’m not able to do a damn thing, when I’m stuck in Pendrago and you’re travelling all over Rolance. You haven’t even been able to travel as far as you like because you don’t want to go too far away.” On the table, his hands clench into fists. “I didn’t come all this way just to be a liability for you.”

In the background, the kettle begins to whistle, its pitch sailing through the roof.

“You’re not a liability,” Sorey says. “I just want you to be safe-”

“And I’m saying I want the same thing for you!” He presses his fists onto the table, leaning over them as he stands. “But I can’t be sure of that when you’re halfway across the continent and I’m stuck here, unable to do a thing.”

Sorey’s face crumbles. He’s always disliked conflict, but this argument is one of the worst, despite its frequency. “I…”

“I’ve already lost everything,” Mikleo says, letting each word ring in the air. “My parents, my hometown, even years of my childhood. I wouldn’t be able to bear it if I lost you, too.”

“It’s the same for me,” Sorey says, voice quiet and sad.

“Then let me come with you. That way we can both protect each other, just like we promised.” Mikleo sits back down, his anger fizzling out. “This dream is ours together, is it not?”

A moment passes before Sorey nods. “It is.”

Mikleo doesn’t reply, instead getting up from his seat. He removes the kettle from the heat, letting its whistle die down. The sound rings in their ears even after it has ended.

“Okay.”

He turns around. At the table, Sorey faces him, wearing a genuine smile.

“Wait, really?”

Of all the things they’re ever argued about, this has always been the subject Sorey is most stubborn about. For him to finally concede is more than surprising to Mikleo.

Sorey’s smile gains a hint of wryness, like he saw this outcome coming. “You think I didn’t notice the stuff on the living room table? I doubt there’s any persuading you not to come with me.”

“Oh.”

“Besides,” Sorey says, standing from his seat at the table. “I’m kind of glad you pushed the subject. Even though I want you to be safe, I want you with me more than that.”

“Sorey…”

Mikleo leans against the kitchen counter as Sorey moves over to him, a hand coming to rest on his waist. He leans their foreheads together, their noses pressing against each other.

“So, when are we doing it?”

He restrains the grin which wants to come to his lips in favour of pressing them against Sorey’s. Naturally he finds his hands around Sorey’s shoulders, pulling him even closer. Just as Sorey opens his mouth to deepen the kiss, however, he pulls back.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Mikleo breathes.

“I’m ready anytime.” Sorey leans forward again, trying to capture Mikleo’s lips once more.

“Then eat your curry first. You can help me dye my hair after that, then we can go.”

Sorey’s free hand curls through Mikleo’s brown locks, pulling him into a deeper kiss. When they part, Sorey’s breath isn’t at all laboured. “I’m kind of going to miss this colour, but you’re really going to suit white.”

“I won’t miss it,” says Mikleo, pressing a closing kiss onto Sorey’s lips. “My boss might, though. He’ll wonder what on earth happened to the brown-haired Mikleo who always obeyed his word.”

“I think he’ll be worrying about the state of his office first and foremost.” Sorey glances to the side where Mikleo can see the table of oddities, looming in the next room.

Smirking, Mikleo says, “It’s only paint. Not like it’ll last forever.”

“That’s a lot of paint, though. And rope.”

“How else are we going to get to the fourth floor of the palace?”

Sorey laughs and pulls away, finally sitting back down at the table to get his half-cold curry. Between mouthfuls he says, “So tonight’s the rebellion. What next?”

“What else? We travel the world in pursuit of our dream.” Mikleo sits down across from Sorey, this time feeling much lighter than before. “Though there is the question of where to start.”

“I have an idea,” Sorey says. “How would you feel about going back to our roots?”

“To Elysia?”

He doesn’t need to ask the question, of course. His roots are burned into his brain - almost literally. The fact that their gentle village came into contact with such a calamity is a difficult thing to forget. It’s been years since that time, though. Maybe they’ll even be able to find survivors.

(A wizened face smiles at him from his memory, and his heart aches. Hopefully he’ll have survived, if anyone.)

“How about it?”

Mikleo blinks out of his thoughts and smiles at Sorey.

“Sounds perfect.”

At last, everything is set.

Notes

[tacophish]

Liu Xiaobo, I have no enemies: my final statement*

June 1989 was the major turning point in my 50 years on life’s road. Before that, I was a member of the first group of students after restoration of the college entrance examination after the Cultural Revolution (1977); my career was s smooth ride from undergraduate to grad student through to PhD. After graduation I stayed on as a lecturer at Beijing Normal University. On the podium, I was a popular teacher, well received by students. I was at the same time a public intellectual. In the 1980s I published articles and books that created an impact, was frequently invited to speak in various places, and was invited to go abroad to Europe and the US as a visiting scholar. What I required of myself was: both as a person and in my writing, I had to live with honesty, responsibility and dignity. Subsequently, because I had returned from the US to take part in the 1989 movement, I was imprisoned for “counter-revolutionary propaganda and incitement to crime”, loding the platform which was my passion; I was never again allowed publish or speak in public in China. Simply for expressing divergent political views and taking part in a peaceful and democratic movement, a teacher loses his podium, a writer loses the right to publish, and a public intellectual loses the chance to speak publicly, which is a sad thing, both for myself as an individual, and for China after three decades of reform and opening up.

Thinking about it, my most dramatic experiences after June Fourth have all linked with courts; the two opportunities I had to speak in public have been provided by trials held in the People’s Intermediate Court in Beijing, one in January 1991 and one now. Although the charges on each occasion were different, they were in essence the same, both being crimes of expression.

Twenty years on, the innocent souls of June Fourth do not yet rest in peace, and I, who had been drawn into the path of dissidence by the passions of June Fourth, after leaving the Qincheng Prison in 1991, lost in the right to speak openly in my own country, and could only do so through overseas media, and hence was monitored for many years; placed under surveillance (May 1995- January 1996); educated through labour (October 1996 – October 1999s), and now once again am thrust into the dock by enemies in the regime. But I still want to tell the regime that deprives me of my freedom, I stand by the belief I expressed twenty years ago in my “June Second hunger strike declaration”— I have no enemies, and no hatred. None of the police who have monitored, arrested and interrogated me, the prosecutors who prosecuted me, or the judges who sentence me, are my enemies. While I’m unable to accept your surveillance, arrest, prosecution or sentencing, I respect your professions and personalities, including Zhang Rongge and Pan Xueqing who act for the prosecution at present. I was aware of your respect and sincerity in your interrogation of me on 3 December.

For hatred is corrosive of a person’s wisdom and conscience; the mentality of enmity can poison a nation’s spirit, instigate brutal life and death struggles, destroy a society’s tolerance and humanity, and block a nation’s progress to freedom and democracy. I hope therefore to be able to transcend my personal vicissitudes in understanding the development of the state and changes in society, to counter the hostility of the regime with the best of intentions, and defuse hate with love.

As we all know, reform and opening up brought about development of the state and change in society. In my view, it began with abandoning “taking class struggle as the key link,” which had been the ruling principle of the Mao era. We committed ourselves instead to economic development and social harmony. The process of abandoning the “philosophy of struggle” was one of gradually diluting the mentality of enmity, eliminating the psychology of hatred, and pressing out the “wolf’s milk” in which our humanity had been steeped. It was this process that provided a relaxed environment for the reform and opening up at home and abroad, for the restoration of mutual love between people, and soft humane soil for the peaceful coexistence of different values and different interests, and thus provided the explosion of popular creativity and the rehabilitation of warmheartedness with incentives consistent with human nature. Externally abandoning “anti-imperialism and anti-revisionism”, and internally, abandoning “class struggle” may be called the basic premise of the continuance of China’s reform and opening up to this day. The market orientation of the economy; the cultural trend toward diversity; and the gradual change of order to the rule of law, all benefited from the dilution of this mentality of enmity. Even in the political field, where progress is slowest, dilution of the mentality of enmity also made political power ever more tolerant of diversity in society, the intensity persecution of dissidents has declined substantially, and characterization of the 1989 movement has changed from an “instigated rebellion” to a “political upheaval.”

The dilution of the mentality of enmity made the political power gradually accept the universality of human rights. In 1998, the Chinese government promised the world it would sign the the two international human rights conventions of the UN, marking China’s recognition of universal human rights standards; in 2004, the National People’s Congress for the first time inscribed into the constitution that “the state respects and safeguards human rights”, signaling that human rights had become one of the fundamental principles of the rule of law. In the meantime, the present regime also proposed “putting people first” and “creating a harmonious society”, which signalled progress in the Party’s concept of rule.

This macro-level progress was discernible as well in my own experiences since being arrested.

While I insist on my innocence, and that the accusations against me are unconstitutional, in the year and more since I lost my freedom, I’ve experienced two places of detention, four pre-trial police officers, three prosecutors and two judges. In their handling of the case, there has been no lack of respect, no time overruns and no forced confessions. Their calm and rational attitude has over and again demonstrated goodwill. I was transferred on 23 June from the residential surveillance to Beijing Municipal Public Security Bureau Detention Center No. 1, known as “Beikan.” I saw progress in surveillance in the six months I spent there.

I spent time in the old Beikan (Banbuqiao) in 1996, and compared with the Beikan of a decade ago, there has been great improvement in the hardware of facilities and software of management.

In particular, Beikan’s innovative humane management based on respecting the rights and dignity of detainees, implementing more flexible management of the will be flexible to the detainees words and deeds, embodied in the Warm broadcast and Repentance, the music played before meals, and when waking up and going to sleep, gave detainees feelings of dignity and warmth, stimulating their consciousness of keeping order in their cells and opposing the warders sense of themselves as lords of the jail, detainees, providing not only a humanized living environment, but greatly improved the detainees’ environment and mindset for litigation, I had close contact with Liu Zhen, in charge of my cell. People feel warmed by his respect and care for detainees, reflected in the management of every detail, and permeating his every word and deed. Getting to know the sincere, honest, responsible, good-hearted Liu Zhen really was a piece of good luck for me in Beikan.

Political beliefs are based on such convictions and personal experiences; I firmly believe that China’s political progress will never stop, and I’m full of optimistic expectations of freedom coming to China in the future, because no force can block the human desire for freedom. China will eventually become a country of the rule of law in which human rights are supreme. I’m also looking forward to such progress being reflected in the trial of this case, and look forward to the full court’s just verdict ——one that can stand the test of history.

Ask me what has been my most fortunate experience of the past two decades, and I’d say it was gaining the selfless love of my wife, Liu Xia. She cannot be present in the courtroom today, but I still want to tell you, sweetheart, that I’m confident that your love for me will be as always. Over the years, in my non-free life, our love has contained bitterness imposed by the external environment, but is boundless in afterthought. I am sentenced to a visible prison while you are waiting in an invisible one. Your love is sunlight that transcends prison walls and bars, stroking every inch of my skin, warming my every cell, letting me maintain my inner calm, magnanimous and bright, so that every minute in prison is full of meaning. But my love for you is full of guilt and regret, sometimes heavy enough hobble my steps. I am a hard stone in the wilderness, putting up with the pummeling of raging storms, and too cold for anyone to dare touch. But my love is hard, sharp, and can penetrate any obstacles. Even if I am crushed into powder, I will embrace you with the ashes.

Given your love, sweetheart, I would face my forthcoming trial calmly, with no regrets about my choice and looking forward to tomorrow optimistically. I look forward to my country being a land of free expression, where all citizens’ speeches are treated the same; here, different values, ideas, beliefs, political views… both compete with each other and coexist peacefully; here, majority and minority opinions will be given equal guarantees, in particular, political views different from those in power will be fully respected and protected; here, all political views will be spread in the sunlight for the people to choose; all citizens will be able to express their political views without fear, and will never be politically persecuted for voicing dissent; I hope to be the last victim of China’s endless literary inquisition, and that after this no one else will ever be jailed for their speech.

Freedom of expression is the basis of human rights, the source of humanity and the mother of truth. To block freedom of speech is to trample on human rights, to strangle humanity and to suppress the truth.

I do not feel guilty for following my constitutional right to freedom of expression, for fulfilling my social responsibility as a Chinese citizen. Even if accused of it, I would have no complaints. Thank you!

Liu Xiaobo (December 23, 2009)

[travisandersondatingblog]

List of the 11 Most Common STDs

By definition, any illness, infection, or disease that can be spread by sexual contact, is a sexually transmitted disease (STD). Everyone knows that sex involves really close contact, making it quite easy for any disease to spread. Yay, germs. Because of this, we cannot give you a straight answer as to how many sexually transmitted diseases there are. What we can do is tell you the generally accepted STDs that society and health professionals acknowledge! And oh dear, there are quite a few.

Before we get started, we want to let you know that most, almost all, STDs are dismally common in the U.S. This is a terrible reality, but it may also be comforting to know that if you have an STD, a handful of people around you are likely in the same exact boat as you. We’re a glass half full group of writers, ok.

Moving on, STDs can live inside your body and not show any symptoms (also known as being asymptomatic) or they can be dormant for years. It’s important to stress that symptoms aren’t always present! We do not want you to look at the symptoms in this list and think, “Oh! I don’t have any of those. I’m good.”

While an STD may lie dormant for many years, it can still be high functioning and destructive all while not alerting the body of its presence. The only way to be sure if you do or don’t have an STD is by getting tested. Almost all are curable, minus herpes, hepatitis, and HIV, but we’ll get into those later. Now, roll up your sleeves and let’s dive into these 11 STDs.

Here are the 11 STDs You Need to Know

Chlamydia

This incredibly common STD is caused by the bacteria Chlamydia trachomatis but is easily cured with a round of antibiotics. It’s transmitted through penetrative sex which includes vaginal, anal, or oral sex with someone who carries the virus. And yes, you can still get chlamydia even if semen isn’t part of the equation.

Symptoms:

Painful sex

Rectal pain

Throat issues

Unusual discharge from the penis or vagina

One or two swollen testicles (although less common)

Problems chlamydia may cause:

According to the CDC, chlamydia can spread to the uterus or fallopian tubes and cause pelvic inflammatory disease (PID. This can produce pain, infertility, and ectopic pregnancy. While chlamydia is most harmful to women, men can still be affected. In men, the tube that carries sperm from the testicles can become infected, causing pain, fever, and although rare, infertility.

  Gonorrhea

It’s famously known as the “clap,” and is caused by the bacterium Neisseria gonorrhoeae. It’s similar to chlamydia as it is really common and affects the same organs with similar long-term effects. It’s also expected for gonorrhea and chlamydia to coexist in the body, so it is recommended to test for both at the same time. Gonorrhea is transmitted by vaginal, anal, or oral sex with someone who is infected. It’s a prevalent STD but is easily cured with prescribed antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Burning sensation while urinating

Painful or swollen testicles

Irregular vaginal bleeding

Unusual discharge

Painful, burning, or swollen glands in the throat

Painful bowel movements

Anal itching

Problems gonorrhea may cause:

Untreated gonorrhea can cause severe and irreversible health issues in both men and women, In women, this disease can lead to PID, form scar tissue that blocks fallopian tubes, ectopic pregnancy, infertility, or long-term pelvic/abdominal pain. In men, it can result in painful conditions in the tubes that transfer semen from the testicles, it may cause sterilization, and, although rare, the condition can spread to your blood or joints and become life-threatening.

  Syphilis

Caused by the bacterium Treponema pallidum, syphilis can become extremely serious if left untreated. Syphilis is becoming more and more common as people have unprotected sex. Its effects are divided into four stages: Primary, secondary, latent, and tertiary. Each stage has different signs and symptoms as it advances. Syphilis is transmitted through direct contact with syphilis sores, and oral, vaginal, or anal intercourse. It is curable; however, there is no reversing any harm it may have caused before treatment.

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Symptoms:

Sores that are usually firm, round, and painless that come and go

Rashes that typically don’t itch

Lesions in mucous membranes

Swollen lymph glands

Sore throat

Patchy hair loss

Fatigue

Fever

Problems syphilis may cause:

As syphilis damages the body, it can cause paralysis, numbness, dementia, changes in vision, or blindness. Once these occur, there is no way to reverse them.

    Mycoplasma Genitalium (MG)

In 2007, this little-known STD became even more common than gonorrhea. It once was considered harmless and just existed as a piggyback infection that hooked onto different diseases instead of it being its own thing. MG, like gonorrhea and chlamydia, has begun to emerge as a significant cause of cervicitis in women and nongonococcal urethritis (inflammation in the urethra that isn’t caused by gonorrhea) in men. It’s transmitted through vaginal, oral, and anal sex. Mycoplasma Genitalium can be cured with a round of antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Burning sensation while urinating

Spotting or bleeding between periods or after sex

Fishy odors after sex and changes in vaginal discharge

Urethral discharge in men

Pain and swelling of the joints

Non-chlamydial, non-gonococcal urethritis in men

Painful sex

Vaginal itching

Problems Mycoplasma Genitalium may cause:

As we learn more about MG, we will know the extent of damage it can cause. So far there have been connections to MG and severe long-term issues such as infertility due to pelvic inflammatory disease.

  Trichomoniasis

This is the most common curable STD, period. It occurs more often in women than in men and is caused by infection by a protozoan parasite called Trichomonas vaginalis. It’s transmitted during sex, from penis to vagina, vice verse, or vagina to vagina. Trichomoniasis, also known as Trich, is cured just by one dose of antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Unusual discharge

Strong vaginal odor

Pain during intercourse

Discomfort during urination

Irritation

Itching

Problems trichomoniasis may cause:

Trich can cause genital inflammation, make you more vulnerable to other STDs, including HIV, and makes it even more likely that you will pass it on to others.

    HIV/AIDS

It was once a devastating blow to be diagnosed with either the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) or the advanced version, the acquired immune deficiency syndrome (AIDS). They were once thought a death sentence, but today it is possible to live a healthy and fulfilling life with HIV. In 2016, the CDC estimated that 1.1 million Americans had HIV in 2016 and 1 in 7 wasn’t aware of it. Despite a common misconception, HIV can only be transmitted by coming into contact with infected bodily fluids such as semen, vaginal secretions, breast milk, and blood, not through casual contacts like sharing food, kissing, plates, or holding hands. HIV/AIDS is incurable, but we do have antiretroviral medications to drastically slow the progress of the illnesses and allow those with the diseases to live a long and healthy life.

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Symptoms:

An unrelenting headache

Swollen lymph glands

Nausea and vomiting

Lack of energy

Sores or lesions

Diarrhea

Joint pain

Fever

Rash

Problems HIV/AIDS may cause:

Because HIV/AIDS destroys immune cells, the body becomes vulnerable to all kinds of infections and illnesses, as the body is no longer as capable of fighting germs off. Before the medication we have available today HIV took a major toll on the body and led to death.

    Human Papillomavirus (HPV)

At one point in time, HPV was worryingly common, but ever since the popularization of the HPV vaccine came around, the infection stopped spreading as rapidly. It’s transmitted through oral, anal, or vaginal sex with an infected person. While HPV doesn’t have an official cure (recent trials are having success but it is not yet ready for the public), the symptoms are typically treated while the infection usually goes away on its own.

Symptoms:

Genital itching

Genital lumps or bumps

Problems HPV may cause:

In most cases, HPV goes away on its own without any health complications. If it doesn’t heal and becomes chronic, genital warts and cancer are potential health issues. It can cause cervical and other cancers such as cancer of the vagina, vulva, penis, and back of the throat.

    Crabs / Pubic Lice

What are commonly knowns as “crabs,” are actually pubic lice that under a magnifying glass look a lot like the crabs you see at the beach. They’re super common, and about 3 million people get infected with pubic lice every year. Crabs are transmitted through sexual contact because they live in between pubic hair and move from one body to the other when in close contact, and although rare, they can also pass through infected linens and clothing. They’re easy to get rid of with an over-the-counter shampoo.

Symptoms:

Excessive itching in the genital area

Tiny crab-like tan or whitish gray bugs in your pubic hair

Crab eggs at the bottom of pubic hairs

Dark or bluish spots on the skin where the bites have occurred

Feeling irritable, feverish, or run-down

Problems crabs/pubic lice may cause:

Other than the annoying discomfort they cause, pubic lice are completely harmless.

  Herpes (HSV-1 & HSV-2)

Herpes is a harmless, unreasonably feared STD due to how crazy common it is. It’s most recognized as the sores or “cold sores” it typically causes above the lip (HSV-1) and/or genital area (HSV-2). It’s transmitted remarkably easily, mostly by skin to skin contact with infected areas, even if no symptoms are present. These modes of transmission are most often when kissing, or participating in vaginal, oral, or anal sex. It’s not curable, but there is medicine to manage and dramatically tone down the symptoms, intensity, and frequency.

Symptoms:

Outbreaks of itchy, painful blisters or sores that come and usually go on the:

Vulva

Vagina

Cervix

Anus

Penis

Scrotum

Butt

Lips

Mouth

Throat

Inner Thighs

Eyes or fingers, although rare

Problems herpes may cause:

Complications are rare, but they exist. Studies on Alzheimer’s are finding connections back to herpes, although the exact relationship is still under research. There have been times herpes caused meningitis (infection of the fluid and tissues that surround the spinal cord and brain) and encephalitis (inflammation of the brain), but this is notably rare. Pregnant women with herpes pose a chance of passing it to the infant during childbirth, and there is a chance of serious damage if doctors aren’t aware of the infection.

  Hepatitis B/HBV

This is an infection that affects the liver. It’s transmitted through contact with infected blood, sores, semen, and other bodily fluids. According to the CDC, rates of HBV have dropped from an average of 200,000 per year in the ’80s to around 20,000 in 2016. HPV is serious when it happens in teens and children, but usually, when adults have it, the body normally is able to fight it off. If treatment becomes necessary, it’s typically done with antiviral drugs. If you’ve already had HBV, your body has built up an immune system against it, and you won’t get it again.

Symptoms:

Belly pain

Fever

Jaundice (yellowing of the skin)

Stomach issues (loss of appetite, light-colored poop, vomiting, and nausea)

Problems HBV may cause:

HBV can cause scarring of the liver, and lead to kidney disease, blood vessel problems, liver failure, and cancer. If not eradicated, it is possible to die from a chronic HBV infection.

Now go make good choices.

You now know, if you didn’t already, the most widespread STDs in the U.S. You can make an informed decision on how often to get tested and what to worry most about. Honestly, if you just got tested once (preferably twice) a year you wouldn’t have to worry about them so much, but we can’t force you. Try as we might. You just can’t say you didn’t know. So, some might say that after reading this post, they’re gonorrhea-valuate their choices. 

IFTTT

[inkognito97]

Youngster I

Summary:The tall figure shook his head in disgust. If he truly were a Jedi and not a Sith in disguise and in search for his lost apprentice, he would have helped them.

Burning hate was all the tall male could feel for the pathetic lives that were screaming in pain and for his help and mercy. These were the same voices which had previously argued how to steal even more from the poor and unsuspecting people. These were the same voices that had declines every offer the Jedi had made to help them balance their society. And now, now it it were their screams that begged for help. The tall figure shook his head in disgust. If he truly were a Jedi and not a Sith in disguise and in search for his lost apprentice, he would have helped them. Granted, he wouldn’t have arranged their deaths in the first place, but still. Since he wasn’t – a Jedi that is – he would just continue to watch them burn; metaphorically speaking as well as literally.

A lot of people had died during the explosion and die to the poisonous gas, but those who had survived, were trapped inside the tall building, along with hot and all consuming flames. It was a gruesome death, but also fitting for those bastards, who allowed children to starve or to freeze in death.

Again the Sith shook his head. His Master had once taught him to look how a system treated its poorest and neediest and from this information, he would know how rotten a planet really was. And it was true. This planet – he had not even bothered to remember its name – was rotten to the core, but with the death of the leading group, it had gained another chance. It had gained the chance for a brand new start. It was just a shame that it always had to come to such drastic manners in order for giving a system a new chance. It was not like he actually enjoyed the killing – not even if it were such bastards – but more often than not, it was the last and only solution. This was one of the things the Jedi needed to understand. Even though the Sith highly doubted that they ever would. They chose to see the good in the worst systems and they would chose to stand aside and watch instead of act. It had always been this way, but at least there had been a time when the Sith and the Jedi coexisted in some way. This time however, was long over.

Wordlessly and without looking back just once, did the tall man with the long brown hair – that was slowly starting to turn gray – walk towards his shuttle. It was a good thing that his shuttle was quite a distance away from the exploded senate building. This way, the Jedi Council would never connect him with the attack, especially if nobody had seen him. This way he could continue to play the perfect little Jedi. He would just tell the Council that he had not arrived soon enough and that it had been already too late and therefore impossible – even for him – to launch a rescue. They undoubtedly would believe him, they always did.

A quiet chuckle escaped his lips. The Jedi Council was just a bunch of blind old fools in his eyes. Fools, who did not even realize that they had allowed Sith to root and foster among their midst. His Master for an instance, he himself and his lost apprentice... Well, it would remain to be seen if his apprentice had truly been kidnapped by the Jedi, like his usually reliable source had told him. If not, then it was about time that the Sith in disguise found a new source. He doubted that he would need to however. His trust was not placed lightly after all...

-----------------------------

Qui-Gon walked with long and confident strides through the temple corridors. He was heading for the only place in this Jedi-forsaken temple that he actually liked and even enjoyed, namely the Room of a thousand Fountains. He needed the serenity and calmness now, after the dreadful meeting with the Council. At least everything had gone according to plan. The great and wise Council members had believed every single lie he had told, without even thinking twice. They were just so naive and blind, especially Kit Fisto. He was the worst of them all in Qui-Gon’s eyes.

A strange sound caught the disguised Sith’s attention and therefore brought him out of his musing. Almost immediately his curiosity was spiked and with a longing gaze down the corridor that would have led him towards the Room of a thousand Fountains, he walked down the corridor that led in the opposite direction instead. Again a sound – this time louder – could be heard and now Qui-Gon identified it as a pained cry of a young child, which was promptly followed by cruel laughter. The Sith quickened his steps. If there was one thing he truly hated with every single pore and cell of his being, then it was when an innocent child was hurt.

The bearded man stopped dead in his tracks once he rounded the corner. The scene that took place in front of him, let his blood boil and caused the darkness in him to shift violently. Bruck Chun, the Initiate every being in the whole temple knew, was standing a few feet away from the Sith. The boy was almost thirteen years old, which meant that he was about to be send away to the Agri Corps. In all honesty, this did not surprise the long haired man in the slightest. The boy was too rotten to become a Sith and that alone meant something. Therefore it was no surprise that no Jedi wanted him either. The boy needed some manners, otherwise his rotten core would even grow, which was probably happening now, while he and his little friends were standing around another child that was lying on the ground. Qui-Gon could barely make out the shivering back of – what looked like – a young boy. The boy on the ground was whimpering in pain and the disguised Sith soon realised why. The bullies’ knuckles were swollen and red and their clothes spotted a few stains of a substance that suspiciously looked like blood. The long haired Sith did not need to ponder long to figure out what had happened here.

“What in the name of the Force is going on here?” only with a lot of effort was the bearded man able to suppress his darkness. It wouldn’t do anybody any good, if his true nature was revealed by his ire and golden eyes.

Almost as soon as he had spoken the first word, the laughing boys grew silent and visibly tensed. They had heard the dangerous edge in the deep and clearly angry baritone voice. The Sith straightened to his full height out of instinct and gazed down in four upturned faces of the Jedi Order’s worst Initiates.

It almost looked as if Bruck Chun and his rotten friends had lost all their previous courage. One of them was even trembling and another one looked as if he was about to wet himself any minute now. Bruck Chun himself looked up at the older male with wide eyes. Qui-Gon knew that the boy had hoped that he would take the Initiate as his Padawan. Not that the Sith would even consider this apprenticeship in a million years, not even if he hadn’t already an apprentice. Granted, the apprentice was not available and findable at the moment, but Qui-Gon was working on that.

“M...Master Jinn, I... I mean we, I mean I... eh,” Chun was stuttering complete nonsense, obviously trying to find a good lie to escape trouble and punishment.

“Enough!” the Sith Master’s voice thundered, causing the Initiates to jump in shock and fear. He was not in the mood for mindless chat and it probably showed on his bearded face, with the way his mouth was set in a firm line and his brows were furrowed tightly. “You will go to Master Yoda and explain – in detail – what you have done here. If you don’t, then I am personally going to make sure that you not only will be properly disciplined, but also send away and punished in the worst imaginable way. Have I made myself clear?” The deep baritone voice had been calm – almost too calm – yet the Initiates could only nod shakily, before they took off as if the Force itself was after them.

Qui-Gon allowed himself to take a few deep and calming breaths, before he finally turned his attention to the boy – and it was indeed a humanoid boy with coppery hair – who was now curled up in a tied ball on the unforgiving ground. Slowly, ever so slowly, the tall man kneeled down and he carefully reached out. The boy tensed upon the contact, but this did not stop the Sith from reaching out with the Force as well. The moment Qui-Gon’s Force presence touched the boy’s, something warm and all too familiar settled in the Sith’s chest. That and the boy’s shaky and uneven breathing calmed and his muscles relaxed, so that the older male was able to turn him onto his back. The boy whimpered in pain and Qui-Gon hummed in sympathy, before gasping in shock when the most beautiful blue-green eyes in the entire universe meet his own blue ones. The blue-green orbs were suspiciously bright however and these were undoubtedly tearstains on bruised and bloody cheeks. Qui-Gon’s heart clenched painfully at the sight.

“Obi-Wan...” the Sith gasped out surprised. Could it really be?

Surprise was mirrored in the ginger haired male’s eyes. “Master Jinn?” a tiny voice wanted to know. The long haired man could only nod his head, not quite trusting his voice. “How do you know my name?” at least the boy did not sound so scared anymore.

Qui-Gon swallowed the lump that had started to form in his throat. It felt like a great and heavy burden had been lifted from his shoulders, only to be replaced by an almost painful pressure in his chest. “I... I must have heard it from one of your crèche Masters,” the lie came quickly to the Master’s lips. There was doubt in the younger male’s eyes, but for now he just accepted the other male’s answer. Qui-Gon could fully understand it.

Obi-Wan shifted slightly and winced in pain. Only then did the Sith come back to the here and now and he quickly scanned the younger male’s visible wounds and injuries.

“We should do something about your injuries, young one.”

The boy’s eyes went wide, “Don’t take me to the healers... please!” he pleaded. The long haired man grimaced, he should have expected this answer.

“If you promise to let me treat you and if you are going to answer ALL my questions truthfully, then I will not take you to the healer wing.” Obi-Wan nodded in agreement, which is why the bearded man gently reached out again and took the light body in his arms, pressing the young child tight against his chest, without hurting him of course. The boy rested his head trustingly against the Master’s chest that was covered by the beige tunics the Jedi always wore. He felt strangely comfortable like this, with his eyes closed and listening to the older man’s steady heartbeat. The Master’s movement helped to soothe the distressed mind and before Obi-Wan realised it, did the pair walk through a door, into a warm and room. Curiously did the young male raise his head and he gazed around the cosy living room, of what he considered the Master’s quarters. A brown leather couch – its colour was lighter than the colour of Qui-Gon’s robe – stood on the middle of the room and a small glass table before it. Countless of plants of different colours and sizes decorated the homely room and Obi-Wan immediately liked it.

The disguised Sith continued to carry his young charge into another room, his bed room. He did not spare the books – actually real books made of paper and quite a lot at that – that lay on the ground, any attention, but gently lowered the ginger haired child on the green blanket that covered his bed. The boy looked around and sometimes his gaze would come to rest on one of the closed boxes that stood in the shelves or on one of the few pictures he had in his room.

“Wait here,” the Master ordered gently and then left to search for a first aid kit in his bathroom, which was just opposite of the bedroom. Thankfully it did not take him long to find all the items he had searched for.

With skilled and practised fingers, did Qui-Gon take care of the blue and swollen bruises, the small fractures and the bleeding nose. Thankfully it had only been a single milk tooth that the ginger haired boy had lost. The broken rib was more complicated however. Qui-Gon had to set it with the use of the Force and despite the pain, Obi-Wan made not a single noise. The Sith was more than impressed by such bravery from one so young. During the whole process, Qui-Gon tickled the wanted answers out of Obi-Wan. Apparently it was quite usual for Bruck Chun and his ‘friend’ to bully other children, they usually were not so brutal however. Apparently Obi-Wan had stood up and protected a few of those children and it had earned him so many painful injuries, and possible, a small trauma.

Only when the child was soundly asleep in the bearded man’s large bed, did Qui-Gon allow himself to sigh in relief. Obi-Wan would sleep for a few hours due to the painkillers and the Sith’s Force suggestion. This would give Qui-Gon enough time to collect his emotions and to talk with his Master. With a last glance towards the sleeping form, did the Sith leave his quarters. He would not need to worry, Obi-Wan would be safe and he would make sure to return before the boy would awake.

---------------------

“Qui-Gon,” the surprised voice of Jard Dooku sounded as he opened the door to his quarters, only to see a familiar figure standing before him, “what brings you here?”

Without answering or offering any way of greeting, the taller male gently moved his former teacher out of his way and stepped inside the quarters before he locked the door.

Dooku was about to repeat his question, when Qui-Gon finally opened his mouth, “I found him.”

“Who?” the older male asked, now more confused than before.

“My apprentice,” Qui-Gon exclaimed and grabbed the other’s elbows, “Obi-Wan... I finally found him.”

Dooku’s eyes first went wide and them something very close to a true smile formed on his face. Dooku – especially when he pretended to be a Jedi – acted as if he was a stoic and unapproachable man, but in reality, he was kind-hearted and like a father to the long haired Sith. He was also something like a grandfather and role-model for Obi-Wan. “These are indeed great news, my former apprentice.” He must have picked up on the younger man’s dimming mood, for he continued, “What is the matter, Qui-Gon? Is he alright? Where exactly is he?”

Hesitantly the older male seated himself on the cushioned seat in the living room, right across Dooku’s couch. The couch held quite a few good memories of Qui-Gon’s apprenticeship. “He is... here, sleeping in my quarters to be exact.”

Dooku’s brows furrowed, “What happened?”

The younger Sith scoffed and avoided the piercing gaze of his former Master, “I found Obi-Wan being bullied by some Initiates... they had beat him to a bloody pulp.” He took a deep breath, “He couldn’t remember anything of... well, of me or of his apprenticeship. He truly believes that he is a Jedi and that he always was and... and he couldn’t even remember me, not even the slightest bit.”

The Sith’s shoulders sacked in defeat and had he looked up, he would have found his position mirrored by Dooku. “I am sorry to hear that.”

Qui-Gon nodded, “Me too... then again, it might be a good opportunity.”

“What are you thinking of?”

The long haired male finally looked up, “I am just saying that it could make everything easier. If we find a way to restore his memories, then I can pretend to take him on as my Padawan when in truth-“

“-you are training him to be a Sith,” Dooku finished the sentence.

A sharp nod, “Exactly.”

“As brilliant as ever,” Dooku gave his younger companion a small smile.

“Only thanks to your teaching, my Master.”

Dooku huffed, “Flattery will not work on me, my young apprentice,” the older Sith had decided to join the slight teasing. It felt right, just like in old times. Then his mood turned serious again. There was still one thing on his mind. “How are you going to restore his memories?”

Again Qui-Gon’s shoulders slightly slumped, but this time, his determined eyes remained locked with Dooku’s. “I have not quite figured it out yet, but I will.”

“Of course you will,” the white haired man stated confidently, “you are MY apprentice after all.”

Qui-Gon took this as a cue to be on his way again. He had a few things to take care of, one of them a young ginger haired boy, who was hopefully still sleeping. The Force suggestion and the sedative should have been enough to force the boy to sleep for a few hours, but with Obi-Wan you could never be too sure. The young Sith had a natural gift in the Force and even without him being conscious, it would purge the unwanted sleepiness out of his bones. Or in short, he was a great apprentice. Qui-Gon barely remembered his first failed attempt. Xanatos had been the boy’s name. He had been too arrogant, too sure of himself. It was quite ironic actually. Xanatos had searched for the power of the dark side, without even realizing, that it was offered to him already.

But Qui-Gon would not complain. Without Xanatos’ miserable attempt to end his life, he would never have met Obi-Wan. The boy, who had not even been reaching the long haired Sith’s hip at the time, had literally jumped in and defeated the dark haired teenager with Qui-Gon’s lightsaber. Of course Qui-Gon would have been able to free himself from the pitiful excuse of a Force inhibitor and he could have easily called his lightsaber back to his hand. But he had settled to lean back and enjoy the show. And he was not disappointed. Quite the opposite in fact, for he had gained a true apprentice so soon after losing some poor excuse. Needless to say the orphan in the dirty rags and with messy red hair had immediately agreed upon Qui-Gon’s offer. He had felt the connection too after all.

-------------------------

With a chuckle and a shake of his head, did Qui-Gon Jinn seat himself on the mattress of his own bed that was currently used by a twelve year old boy. The mattress gave way under his weight, but the sleeping form did not even stir.

Qui-Gon had just pictured the look Dooku would give him, could the old man see his former apprentice now. He was fretting over the resting form of a – more or less – healthy human male. Then again, Dooku would probably understand his fretting. Obi-Wan was a beloved member of their small family after all.

An annoying beeping brought the Sith out of his musing and with great reluctance did he get up again and took the call from his comlink. He shouldn’t have been surprised that it were Mace and Yoda on the other side. They were truly the only two Jedi, who at least possessed a little brain, despite Mace’s other shortcomings. They didn’t even lecture him, because he might have ‘kidnapped’ one of the Initiates, which could very well have been, because he had told them that he would take Obi-Wan Kenobi as his Padawan learner. The gazed they had exchanged said more than a thousand words. There was doubt and even some fear in their eyes.

Of course they were aware of Obi-Wan’s origin and now they worried for ‘Jedi Master Jinn’, who had already lost one apprentice to the dark side. They feared that the potential in Obi-Wan was still very present and it was all very amusing and very ironic in the Sith’s eyes. In the end they gave up, probably because Qui-Gon might have mentioned the bond that had formed between him and the boy. Reformed would be the better word, but it would just raise unwanted questions. And thus was, how Qui-Gon found himself with a Padawan leaner, who did know nothing of his luck yet. Then again, luck was relative. Not that Qui-Gon believed in luck, he solemnly believed in the ways of the Force, but that was beside the point now. The point was however, that he would do everything in his power to bring back HIS sweet little Obi-Wan, his light in the darkest nights, his drop water in the desert heat and his rock in the surf. All of the mentioned things, or you could just say, his son in all but blood.

The sound of bare feet made Qui-Gon turn around, just in time to see a certain ginger haired male walk through the door into the living room. The boy was partly yawning and rubbing his eyes. He had not realized that Qui-Gon was watching him and the Sith in question had no desire to change that yet.

After a few strands of ginger hair were pushed away, did blue-green eyes turn to the tall male, who was standing in the middle of the room, patiently waiting. There was no surprise in the young eyes and Qui-Gon only barely kept himself from smiling. So the imp HAD known that he was being watched.

“Why hello there, young one.” The tall Master eventually broke the silence.

“Hello, Master Jinn,” the boy visibly relaxed and his clever eyes darted through the room, undoubtedly inspecting and analyzing everything that seemed important. The born strategist, at least that is what Dooku had once said.

“How are you feeling?” Qui-Gon wanted to know.

“Alright I guess.” He quickly continued at the raised eyebrow he recieved, “I am still sleepy and it hurts...” he trailed off and avoided the older man’s gaze.

The Sith Master had not expected anything else form his foster son. He knew Obi-Wan better than anybody else, as was the case the other way around. He knew he could trust his little red-haired devil with everything, except his one health. “Are you hungry?” he eventually asked.

Obi-Wan shook his head, “No, sir.”

The older man hummed. This was not unusual after being sedated, even though, his apprentice had the tendency to not eat regularly or very well. He reached up and pulled out the leather tie that held his hair in a braid and out of his face, all the while being watched by blue-green orbs. The older male shook his head, causing his auburn hear to fly around and settle on his shoulders. He was in the process of redoing his braid, when a shy voice asked, “Shall I help you, Master?”

The question had been unexpected and thus was why Qui-Gon froze in mid-movement. Obi-Wan had always enjoyed playing and braiding his hair, even when he was still very young and small. “I would be honoured,” the Sith finally answered, after he realized that the nervous fidgeting was, because he had not given an answer yet.

A small smile appeared on young features and with a mental sigh, did Qui-Gon kneel on the ground right in front of the couch. This way, the younger male could climb atop the cushioned furniture, which the boy immediately did. It didn’t take long for him to start his task and the Sith Master was soon reminded of all the quite evenings he and his young charge had shared, doing nothing, but enjoying the calm and peace. Apparently he was not the only one.

“It’s strange,” Obi-Wan mumbled, after he had combed through the long dark locks.

“What is?” Qui-Gon asked. He couldn’t quite place it, but something deep inside him, something had begun to tingle.

“I feel as if I have done this countless of times already... but it isn’t possible.” The older man’s heart had started to speed up a little bit. Could this be his apprentice remembering who he really was? But before the Master could come up with an answer, something else caught the ginger haired boy’s attention. He hesitated for a moment, but then he gently lifted a thin braid that had rested right under Qui-Gon’s usual thick braid and had therefore been hidden from view. Qui-Gon had forgotten that it was there himself. A single blood red bead was attached to the three strands of hair that had been interwoven. “I know this bead,” Obi-Wan began and unknowingly the older of the two held his breath, “I have gifted it to you, after... after you took me as your apprentice.”

Something changed in the boy and his whole posture tensed. He let go of the bead and his blue-green eyes widened in shook. The larger man turned to face his charge, still on his knees on the floor, and cautiously reached out for his apprentice. “Obi-Wan...”

“Master,” this single word broke the dam. It wasn’t like the Sith in training hadn’t uttered the word before, but this time it held a certain undertone to it.

“My child,” the Master allowed himself to smile at his young companion and without further ado, he had pulled the boy from the couch, onto his lap. Obi-Wan clung onto him like a drowning man. “Oh Obi-Wan, I had been so worried.”

“I am sorry Master!” sobbed the ginger haired boy into the older male’s neck, “If I had been stronger-“ “Hush, young one,” Qui-Gon soothed the distressed male in his arms, while stroking the ginger locks. “If you had been stronger, they would have imprisoned you, or worse, they would have killed you.”

“I am sorry,” the boy repeated.

“Don’t be,” the tall man was surprised how gentle and calm his own voice sounded. But then, he was just glad to have his son back. “I am very proud of you, my imp.”

Neither male knew how long they sat there, with Qui-Gon leaning against the couch and Obi-Wan in his Master’s loving arms. At one point, it became clear that the boy’s exhaustion was taking over and with a grunt, the Sith Master got to his feet and carried his precious cargo into his bedroom. The apprentice was gently lowered onto the bed and tucked in again.

“What is going to happen now, Master?”

Qui-Gon gave his little devil a small smile, “Now you are going to sleep, my imp, and tomorrow... well, tomorrow you are going to help me, move the furniture. Now that I have a Padawan, I have to reorganize my rooms, after all.”

Confusion was plainly written on young features, but not a second later, the furrowed brows smoothed out and a wicked smile appeared on Obi-Wan’s face. Qui-Gon chuckled mentally, leave it to his brat to figure the hidden message between his words out in an instant. “I cannot await it, my Master.”

“Me neither Padawan,” The last word was emphasized mockingly, “but now, rest.” He bent down to leave a kiss on his charge’s forehead, before turning off the light in the room. “Sleep well, my child.”

“Good night, father,” came the drowsy reply and in the next moment, Obi-Wan had fallen into a dreamless sleep.

[travisandersondatingblog]

The Complete List of STDs

By definition, any illness, infection, or disease that can be spread by sexual contact, is a sexually transmitted disease (STD). Everyone knows that sex involves really close contact, making it quite easy for any disease to spread. Yay, germs. Because of this, we cannot give you a straight answer as to how many sexually transmitted diseases there are. What we can do is tell you the generally accepted STDs that society and health professionals acknowledge! And oh dear, there are quite a few.

Before we get started, we want to let you know that most, almost all, STDs are dismally common in the U.S. This is a terrible reality, but it may also be comforting to know that if you have an STD, a handful of people around you are likely in the same exact boat as you. We’re a glass half full group of writers, ok.

Moving on, STDs can live inside your body and not show any symptoms (also known as being asymptomatic) or they can be dormant for years. It’s important to stress that symptoms aren’t always present! We do not want you to look at the symptoms in this list and think, “Oh! I don’t have any of those. I’m good.”

While an STD may lie dormant for many years, it can still be high functioning and destructive all while not alerting the body of its presence. The only way to be sure if you do or don’t have an STD is by getting tested. Almost all are curable, minus herpes, hepatitis, and HIV, but we’ll get into those later. Now, roll up your sleeves and let’s dive into these 11 STDs.

Here are the 11 STDs You Need to Know

Chlamydia

This incredibly common STD is caused by the bacteria Chlamydia trachomatis but is easily cured with a round of antibiotics. It’s transmitted through penetrative sex which includes vaginal, anal, or oral sex with someone who carries the virus. And yes, you can still get chlamydia even if semen isn’t part of the equation.

Symptoms:

Painful sex

Rectal pain

Throat issues

Unusual discharge from the penis or vagina

One or two swollen testicles (although less common)

Problems chlamydia may cause:

According to the CDC, chlamydia can spread to the uterus or fallopian tubes and cause pelvic inflammatory disease (PID. This can produce pain, infertility, and ectopic pregnancy. While chlamydia is most harmful to women, men can still be affected. In men, the tube that carries sperm from the testicles can become infected, causing pain, fever, and although rare, infertility.

  Gonorrhea

It’s famously known as the “clap,” and is caused by the bacterium Neisseria gonorrhoeae. It’s similar to chlamydia as it is really common and affects the same organs with similar long-term effects. It’s also expected for gonorrhea and chlamydia to coexist in the body, so it is recommended to test for both at the same time. Gonorrhea is transmitted by vaginal, anal, or oral sex with someone who is infected. It’s a prevalent STD but is easily cured with prescribed antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Burning sensation while urinating

Painful or swollen testicles

Irregular vaginal bleeding

Unusual discharge

Painful, burning, or swollen glands in the throat

Painful bowel movements

Anal itching

Problems gonorrhea may cause:

Untreated gonorrhea can cause severe and irreversible health issues in both men and women, In women, this disease can lead to PID, form scar tissue that blocks fallopian tubes, ectopic pregnancy, infertility, or long-term pelvic/abdominal pain. In men, it can result in painful conditions in the tubes that transfer semen from the testicles, it may cause sterilization, and, although rare, the condition can spread to your blood or joints and become life-threatening.

  Syphilis

Caused by the bacterium Treponema pallidum, syphilis can become extremely serious if left untreated. Syphilis is becoming more and more common as people have unprotected sex. Its effects are divided into four stages: Primary, secondary, latent, and tertiary. Each stage has different signs and symptoms as it advances. Syphilis is transmitted through direct contact with syphilis sores, and oral, vaginal, or anal intercourse. It is curable; however, there is no reversing any harm it may have caused before treatment.

Secure and Confidential STD testing services

The fastest results possbile - available in 1 to 2 days

Get Tested Today

Symptoms:

Sores that are usually firm, round, and painless that come and go

Rashes that typically don’t itch

Lesions in mucous membranes

Swollen lymph glands

Sore throat

Patchy hair loss

Fatigue

Fever

Problems syphilis may cause:

As syphilis damages the body, it can cause paralysis, numbness, dementia, changes in vision, or blindness. Once these occur, there is no way to reverse them.

    Mycoplasma Genitalium (MG)

In 2007, this little-known STD became even more common than gonorrhea. It once was considered harmless and just existed as a piggyback infection that hooked onto different diseases instead of it being its own thing. MG, like gonorrhea and chlamydia, has begun to emerge as a significant cause of cervicitis in women and nongonococcal urethritis (inflammation in the urethra that isn’t caused by gonorrhea) in men. It’s transmitted through vaginal, oral, and anal sex. Mycoplasma Genitalium can be cured with a round of antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Burning sensation while urinating

Spotting or bleeding between periods or after sex

Fishy odors after sex and changes in vaginal discharge

Urethral discharge in men

Pain and swelling of the joints

Non-chlamydial, non-gonococcal urethritis in men

Painful sex

Vaginal itching

Problems Mycoplasma Genitalium may cause:

As we learn more about MG, we will know the extent of damage it can cause. So far there have been connections to MG and severe long-term issues such as infertility due to pelvic inflammatory disease.

  Trichomoniasis

This is the most common curable STD, period. It occurs more often in women than in men and is caused by infection by a protozoan parasite called Trichomonas vaginalis. It’s transmitted during sex, from penis to vagina, vice verse, or vagina to vagina. Trichomoniasis, also known as Trich, is cured just by one dose of antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Unusual discharge

Strong vaginal odor

Pain during intercourse

Discomfort during urination

Irritation

Itching

Problems trichomoniasis may cause:

Trich can cause genital inflammation, make you more vulnerable to other STDs, including HIV, and makes it even more likely that you will pass it on to others.

    HIV/AIDS

It was once a devastating blow to be diagnosed with either the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) or the advanced version, the acquired immune deficiency syndrome (AIDS). They were once thought a death sentence, but today it is possible to live a healthy and fulfilling life with HIV. In 2016, the CDC estimated that 1.1 million Americans had HIV in 2016 and 1 in 7 wasn’t aware of it. Despite a common misconception, HIV can only be transmitted by coming into contact with infected bodily fluids such as semen, vaginal secretions, breast milk, and blood, not through casual contacts like sharing food, kissing, plates, or holding hands. HIV/AIDS is incurable, but we do have antiretroviral medications to drastically slow the progress of the illnesses and allow those with the diseases to live a long and healthy life.

Secure and Confidential STD testing services

The fastest results possbile - available in 1 to 2 days

Get Tested Today

Symptoms:

An unrelenting headache

Swollen lymph glands

Nausea and vomiting

Lack of energy

Sores or lesions

Diarrhea

Joint pain

Fever

Rash

Problems HIV/AIDS may cause:

Because HIV/AIDS destroys immune cells, the body becomes vulnerable to all kinds of infections and illnesses, as the body is no longer as capable of fighting germs off. Before the medication we have available today HIV took a major toll on the body and led to death.

    Human Papillomavirus (HPV)

At one point in time, HPV was worryingly common, but ever since the popularization of the HPV vaccine came around, the infection stopped spreading as rapidly. It’s transmitted through oral, anal, or vaginal sex with an infected person. While HPV doesn’t have an official cure (recent trials are having success but it is not yet ready for the public), the symptoms are typically treated while the infection usually goes away on its own.

Symptoms:

Genital itching

Genital lumps or bumps

Problems HPV may cause:

In most cases, HPV goes away on its own without any health complications. If it doesn’t heal and becomes chronic, genital warts and cancer are potential health issues. It can cause cervical and other cancers such as cancer of the vagina, vulva, penis, and back of the throat.

    Crabs / Pubic Lice

What are commonly knowns as “crabs,” are actually pubic lice that under a magnifying glass look a lot like the crabs you see at the beach. They’re super common, and about 3 million people get infected with pubic lice every year. Crabs are transmitted through sexual contact because they live in between pubic hair and move from one body to the other when in close contact, and although rare, they can also pass through infected linens and clothing. They’re easy to get rid of with an over-the-counter shampoo.

Symptoms:

Excessive itching in the genital area

Tiny crab-like tan or whitish gray bugs in your pubic hair

Crab eggs at the bottom of pubic hairs

Dark or bluish spots on the skin where the bites have occurred

Feeling irritable, feverish, or run-down

Problems crabs/pubic lice may cause:

Other than the annoying discomfort they cause, pubic lice are completely harmless.

  Herpes (HSV-1 & HSV-2)

Herpes is a harmless, unreasonably feared STD due to how crazy common it is. It’s most recognized as the sores or “cold sores” it typically causes above the lip (HSV-1) and/or genital area (HSV-2). It’s transmitted remarkably easily, mostly by skin to skin contact with infected areas, even if no symptoms are present. These modes of transmission are most often when kissing, or participating in vaginal, oral, or anal sex. It’s not curable, but there is medicine to manage and dramatically tone down the symptoms, intensity, and frequency.

Symptoms:

Outbreaks of itchy, painful blisters or sores that come and usually go on the:

Vulva

Vagina

Cervix

Anus

Penis

Scrotum

Butt

Lips

Mouth

Throat

Inner Thighs

Eyes or fingers, although rare

Problems herpes may cause:

Complications are rare, but they exist. Studies on Alzheimer’s are finding connections back to herpes, although the exact relationship is still under research. There have been times herpes caused meningitis (infection of the fluid and tissues that surround the spinal cord and brain) and encephalitis (inflammation of the brain), but this is notably rare. Pregnant women with herpes pose a chance of passing it to the infant during childbirth, and there is a chance of serious damage if doctors aren’t aware of the infection.

  Hepatitis B/HBV

This is an infection that affects the liver. It’s transmitted through contact with infected blood, sores, semen, and other bodily fluids. According to the CDC, rates of HBV have dropped from an average of 200,000 per year in the ’80s to around 20,000 in 2016. HPV is serious when it happens in teens and children, but usually, when adults have it, the body normally is able to fight it off. If treatment becomes necessary, it’s typically done with antiviral drugs. If you’ve already had HBV, your body has built up an immune system against it, and you won’t get it again.

Symptoms:

Belly pain

Fever

Jaundice (yellowing of the skin)

Stomach issues (loss of appetite, light-colored poop, vomiting, and nausea)

Problems HBV may cause:

HBV can cause scarring of the liver, and lead to kidney disease, blood vessel problems, liver failure, and cancer. If not eradicated, it is possible to die from a chronic HBV infection.

Now go make good choices.

You now know, if you didn’t already, the most widespread STDs in the U.S. You can make an informed decision on how often to get tested and what to worry most about. Honestly, if you just got tested once (preferably twice) a year you wouldn’t have to worry about them so much, but we can’t force you. Try as we might. You just can’t say you didn’t know. So, some might say that after reading this post, they’re gonorrhea-valuate their choices. 

IFTTT

[travisandersondatingblog]

List of STDS (11 Most Common STDs)

By definition, any illness, infection, or disease that can be spread by sexual contact, is a sexually transmitted disease (STD). Everyone knows that sex involves really close contact, making it quite easy for any disease to spread. Yay, germs. Because of this, we cannot give you a straight answer as to how many sexually transmitted diseases there are. What we can do is tell you the generally accepted STDs that society and health professionals acknowledge! And oh dear, there are quite a few.

Before we get started, we want to let you know that most, almost all, STDs are dismally common in the U.S. This is a terrible reality, but it may also be comforting to know that if you have an STD, a handful of people around you are likely in the same exact boat as you. We’re a glass half full group of writers, ok.

Moving on, STDs can live inside your body and not show any symptoms (also known as being asymptomatic) or they can be dormant for years. It’s important to stress that symptoms aren’t always present! We do not want you to look at the symptoms in this list and think, “Oh! I don’t have any of those. I’m good.”

While an STD may lie dormant for many years, it can still be high functioning and destructive all while not alerting the body of its presence. The only way to be sure if you do or don’t have an STD is by getting tested. Almost all are curable, minus herpes, hepatitis, and HIV, but we’ll get into those later. Now, roll up your sleeves and let’s dive into these 11 STDs.

Here are the 11 STDs You Need to Know

Chlamydia

This incredibly common STD is caused by the bacteria Chlamydia trachomatis but is easily cured with a round of antibiotics. It’s transmitted through penetrative sex which includes vaginal, anal, or oral sex with someone who carries the virus. And yes, you can still get chlamydia even if semen isn’t part of the equation.

Symptoms:

Painful sex

Rectal pain

Throat issues

Unusual discharge from the penis or vagina

One or two swollen testicles (although less common)

Problems chlamydia may cause:

According to the CDC, chlamydia can spread to the uterus or fallopian tubes and cause pelvic inflammatory disease (PID. This can produce pain, infertility, and ectopic pregnancy. While chlamydia is most harmful to women, men can still be affected. In men, the tube that carries sperm from the testicles can become infected, causing pain, fever, and although rare, infertility.

  Gonorrhea

It’s famously known as the “clap,” and is caused by the bacterium Neisseria gonorrhoeae. It’s similar to chlamydia as it is really common and affects the same organs with similar long-term effects. It’s also expected for gonorrhea and chlamydia to coexist in the body, so it is recommended to test for both at the same time. Gonorrhea is transmitted by vaginal, anal, or oral sex with someone who is infected. It’s a prevalent STD but is easily cured with prescribed antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Burning sensation while urinating

Painful or swollen testicles

Irregular vaginal bleeding

Unusual discharge

Painful, burning, or swollen glands in the throat

Painful bowel movements

Anal itching

Problems gonorrhea may cause:

Untreated gonorrhea can cause severe and irreversible health issues in both men and women, In women, this disease can lead to PID, form scar tissue that blocks fallopian tubes, ectopic pregnancy, infertility, or long-term pelvic/abdominal pain. In men, it can result in painful conditions in the tubes that transfer semen from the testicles, it may cause sterilization, and, although rare, the condition can spread to your blood or joints and become life-threatening.

  Syphilis

Caused by the bacterium Treponema pallidum, syphilis can become extremely serious if left untreated. Syphilis is becoming more and more common as people have unprotected sex. Its effects are divided into four stages: Primary, secondary, latent, and tertiary. Each stage has different signs and symptoms as it advances. Syphilis is transmitted through direct contact with syphilis sores, and oral, vaginal, or anal intercourse. It is curable; however, there is no reversing any harm it may have caused before treatment.

Secure and Confidential STD testing services

The fastest results possbile - available in 1 to 2 days

Get Tested Today

Symptoms:

Sores that are usually firm, round, and painless that come and go

Rashes that typically don’t itch

Lesions in mucous membranes

Swollen lymph glands

Sore throat

Patchy hair loss

Fatigue

Fever

Problems syphilis may cause:

As syphilis damages the body, it can cause paralysis, numbness, dementia, changes in vision, or blindness. Once these occur, there is no way to reverse them.

    Mycoplasma Genitalium (MG)

In 2007, this little-known STD became even more common than gonorrhea. It once was considered harmless and just existed as a piggyback infection that hooked onto different diseases instead of it being its own thing. MG, like gonorrhea and chlamydia, has begun to emerge as a significant cause of cervicitis in women and nongonococcal urethritis (inflammation in the urethra that isn’t caused by gonorrhea) in men. It’s transmitted through vaginal, oral, and anal sex. Mycoplasma Genitalium can be cured with a round of antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Burning sensation while urinating

Spotting or bleeding between periods or after sex

Fishy odors after sex and changes in vaginal discharge

Urethral discharge in men

Pain and swelling of the joints

Non-chlamydial, non-gonococcal urethritis in men

Painful sex

Vaginal itching

Problems Mycoplasma Genitalium may cause:

As we learn more about MG, we will know the extent of damage it can cause. So far there have been connections to MG and severe long-term issues such as infertility due to pelvic inflammatory disease.

  Trichomoniasis

This is the most common curable STD, period. It occurs more often in women than in men and is caused by infection by a protozoan parasite called Trichomonas vaginalis. It’s transmitted during sex, from penis to vagina, vice verse, or vagina to vagina. Trichomoniasis, also known as Trich, is cured just by one dose of antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Unusual discharge

Strong vaginal odor

Pain during intercourse

Discomfort during urination

Irritation

Itching

Problems trichomoniasis may cause:

Trich can cause genital inflammation, make you more vulnerable to other STDs, including HIV, and makes it even more likely that you will pass it on to others.

    HIV/AIDS

It was once a devastating blow to be diagnosed with either the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) or the advanced version, the acquired immune deficiency syndrome (AIDS). They were once thought a death sentence, but today it is possible to live a healthy and fulfilling life with HIV. In 2016, the CDC estimated that 1.1 million Americans had HIV in 2016 and 1 in 7 wasn’t aware of it. Despite a common misconception, HIV can only be transmitted by coming into contact with infected bodily fluids such as semen, vaginal secretions, breast milk, and blood, not through casual contacts like sharing food, kissing, plates, or holding hands. HIV/AIDS is incurable, but we do have antiretroviral medications to drastically slow the progress of the illnesses and allow those with the diseases to live a long and healthy life.

Secure and Confidential STD testing services

The fastest results possbile - available in 1 to 2 days

Get Tested Today

Symptoms:

An unrelenting headache

Swollen lymph glands

Nausea and vomiting

Lack of energy

Sores or lesions

Diarrhea

Joint pain

Fever

Rash

Problems HIV/AIDS may cause:

Because HIV/AIDS destroys immune cells, the body becomes vulnerable to all kinds of infections and illnesses, as the body is no longer as capable of fighting germs off. Before the medication we have available today HIV took a major toll on the body and led to death.

    Human Papillomavirus (HPV)

At one point in time, HPV was worryingly common, but ever since the popularization of the HPV vaccine came around, the infection stopped spreading as rapidly. It’s transmitted through oral, anal, or vaginal sex with an infected person. While HPV doesn’t have an official cure (recent trials are having success but it is not yet ready for the public), the symptoms are typically treated while the infection usually goes away on its own.

Symptoms:

Genital itching

Genital lumps or bumps

Problems HPV may cause:

In most cases, HPV goes away on its own without any health complications. If it doesn’t heal and becomes chronic, genital warts and cancer are potential health issues. It can cause cervical and other cancers such as cancer of the vagina, vulva, penis, and back of the throat.

    Crabs / Pubic Lice

What are commonly knowns as “crabs,” are actually pubic lice that under a magnifying glass look a lot like the crabs you see at the beach. They’re super common, and about 3 million people get infected with pubic lice every year. Crabs are transmitted through sexual contact because they live in between pubic hair and move from one body to the other when in close contact, and although rare, they can also pass through infected linens and clothing. They’re easy to get rid of with an over-the-counter shampoo.

Symptoms:

Excessive itching in the genital area

Tiny crab-like tan or whitish gray bugs in your pubic hair

Crab eggs at the bottom of pubic hairs

Dark or bluish spots on the skin where the bites have occurred

Feeling irritable, feverish, or run-down

Problems crabs/pubic lice may cause:

Other than the annoying discomfort they cause, pubic lice are completely harmless.

  Herpes (HSV-1 & HSV-2)

Herpes is a harmless, unreasonably feared STD due to how crazy common it is. It’s most recognized as the sores or “cold sores” it typically causes above the lip (HSV-1) and/or genital area (HSV-2). It’s transmitted remarkably easily, mostly by skin to skin contact with infected areas, even if no symptoms are present. These modes of transmission are most often when kissing, or participating in vaginal, oral, or anal sex. It’s not curable, but there is medicine to manage and dramatically tone down the symptoms, intensity, and frequency.

Symptoms:

Outbreaks of itchy, painful blisters or sores that come and usually go on the:

Vulva

Vagina

Cervix

Anus

Penis

Scrotum

Butt

Lips

Mouth

Throat

Inner Thighs

Eyes or fingers, although rare

Problems herpes may cause:

Complications are rare, but they exist. Studies on Alzheimer’s are finding connections back to herpes, although the exact relationship is still under research. There have been times herpes caused meningitis (infection of the fluid and tissues that surround the spinal cord and brain) and encephalitis (inflammation of the brain), but this is notably rare. Pregnant women with herpes pose a chance of passing it to the infant during childbirth, and there is a chance of serious damage if doctors aren’t aware of the infection.

  Hepatitis B/HBV

This is an infection that affects the liver. It’s transmitted through contact with infected blood, sores, semen, and other bodily fluids. According to the CDC, rates of HBV have dropped from an average of 200,000 per year in the ’80s to around 20,000 in 2016. HPV is serious when it happens in teens and children, but usually, when adults have it, the body normally is able to fight it off. If treatment becomes necessary, it’s typically done with antiviral drugs. If you’ve already had HBV, your body has built up an immune system against it, and you won’t get it again.

Symptoms:

Belly pain

Fever

Jaundice (yellowing of the skin)

Stomach issues (loss of appetite, light-colored poop, vomiting, and nausea)

Problems HBV may cause:

HBV can cause scarring of the liver, and lead to kidney disease, blood vessel problems, liver failure, and cancer. If not eradicated, it is possible to die from a chronic HBV infection.

Now go make good choices.

You now know, if you didn’t already, the most widespread STDs in the U.S. You can make an informed decision on how often to get tested and what to worry most about. Honestly, if you just got tested once (preferably twice) a year you wouldn’t have to worry about them so much, but we can’t force you. Try as we might. You just can’t say you didn’t know. So, some might say that after reading this post, they’re gonorrhea-valuate their choices. 

IFTTT

[travisandersondatingblog]

The 11 STDs You Need to Know

By definition, any illness, infection, or disease that can be spread by sexual contact, is a sexually transmitted disease (STD). Everyone knows that sex involves really close contact, making it quite easy for any disease to spread. Yay, germs. Because of this, we cannot give you a straight answer as to how many sexually transmitted diseases there are. What we can do is tell you the generally accepted STDs that society and health professionals acknowledge! And oh dear, there are quite a few.

Before we get started, we want to let you know that most, almost all, STDs are dismally common in the U.S. This is a terrible reality, but it may also be comforting to know that if you have an STD, a handful of people around you are likely in the same exact boat as you. We’re a glass half full group of writers, ok.

Moving on, STDs can live inside your body and not show any symptoms (also known as being asymptomatic) or they can be dormant for years. It’s important to stress that symptoms aren’t always present! We do not want you to look at the symptoms in this list and think, “Oh! I don’t have any of those. I’m good.”

While an STD may lie dormant for many years, it can still be high functioning and destructive all while not alerting the body of its presence. The only way to be sure if you do or don’t have an STD is by getting tested. Almost all are curable, minus herpes, hepatitis, and HIV, but we’ll get into those later. Now, roll up your sleeves and let’s dive into these 11 STDs.

Chlamydia

This incredibly common STD is caused by the bacteria Chlamydia trachomatis but is easily cured with a round of antibiotics. It’s transmitted through penetrative sex which includes vaginal, anal, or oral sex with someone who carries the virus. And yes, you can still get chlamydia even if semen isn’t part of the equation.

Symptoms:

Painful sex

Rectal pain

Throat issues

Unusual discharge from the penis or vagina

One or two swollen testicles (although less common)

Problems chlamydia may cause:

According to the CDC, chlamydia can spread to the uterus or fallopian tubes and cause pelvic inflammatory disease (PID. This can produce pain, infertility, and ectopic pregnancy. While chlamydia is most harmful to women, men can still be affected. In men, the tube that carries sperm from the testicles can become infected, causing pain, fever, and although rare, infertility.

  Gonorrhea

It’s famously known as the “clap,” and is caused by the bacterium Neisseria gonorrhoeae. It’s similar to chlamydia as it is really common and affects the same organs with similar long-term effects. It’s also expected for gonorrhea and chlamydia to coexist in the body, so it is recommended to test for both at the same time. Gonorrhea is transmitted by vaginal, anal, or oral sex with someone who is infected. It’s a prevalent STD but is easily cured with prescribed antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Burning sensation while urinating

Painful or swollen testicles

Irregular vaginal bleeding

Unusual discharge

Painful, burning, or swollen glands in the throat

Painful bowel movements

Anal itching

Problems gonorrhea may cause:

Untreated gonorrhea can cause severe and irreversible health issues in both men and women, In women, this disease can lead to PID, form scar tissue that blocks fallopian tubes, ectopic pregnancy, infertility, or long-term pelvic/abdominal pain. In men, it can result in painful conditions in the tubes that transfer semen from the testicles, it may cause sterilization, and, although rare, the condition can spread to your blood or joints and become life-threatening.

  Syphilis

Caused by the bacterium Treponema pallidum, syphilis can become extremely serious if left untreated. Syphilis is becoming more and more common as people have unprotected sex. Its effects are divided into four stages: Primary, secondary, latent, and tertiary. Each stage has different signs and symptoms as it advances. Syphilis is transmitted through direct contact with syphilis sores, and oral, vaginal, or anal intercourse. It is curable; however, there is no reversing any harm it may have caused before treatment.

Secure and Confidential STD testing services

The fastest results possbile - available in 1 to 2 days

Get Tested Today

Symptoms:

Sores that are usually firm, round, and painless that come and go

Rashes that typically don’t itch

Lesions in mucous membranes

Swollen lymph glands

Sore throat

Patchy hair loss

Fatigue

Fever

Problems syphilis may cause:

As syphilis damages the body, it can cause paralysis, numbness, dementia, changes in vision, or blindness. Once these occur, there is no way to reverse them.

    Mycoplasma Genitalium (MG)

In 2007, this little-known STD became even more common than gonorrhea. It once was considered harmless and just existed as a piggyback infection that hooked onto different diseases instead of it being its own thing. MG, like gonorrhea and chlamydia, has begun to emerge as a significant cause of cervicitis in women and nongonococcal urethritis (inflammation in the urethra that isn’t caused by gonorrhea) in men. It’s transmitted through vaginal, oral, and anal sex. Mycoplasma Genitalium can be cured with a round of antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Burning sensation while urinating

Spotting or bleeding between periods or after sex

Fishy odors after sex and changes in vaginal discharge

Urethral discharge in men

Pain and swelling of the joints

Non-chlamydial, non-gonococcal urethritis in men

Painful sex

Vaginal itching

Problems Mycoplasma Genitalium may cause:

As we learn more about MG, we will know the extent of damage it can cause. So far there have been connections to MG and severe long-term issues such as infertility due to pelvic inflammatory disease.

  Trichomoniasis

This is the most common curable STD, period. It occurs more often in women than in men and is caused by infection by a protozoan parasite called Trichomonas vaginalis. It’s transmitted during sex, from penis to vagina, vice verse, or vagina to vagina. Trichomoniasis, also known as Trich, is cured just by one dose of antibiotics.

Symptoms:

Unusual discharge

Strong vaginal odor

Pain during intercourse

Discomfort during urination

Irritation

Itching

Problems trichomoniasis may cause:

Trich can cause genital inflammation, make you more vulnerable to other STDs, including HIV, and makes it even more likely that you will pass it on to others.

    HIV/AIDS

It was once a devastating blow to be diagnosed with either the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) or the advanced version, the acquired immune deficiency syndrome (AIDS). They were once thought a death sentence, but today it is possible to live a healthy and fulfilling life with HIV. In 2016, the CDC estimated that 1.1 million Americans had HIV in 2016 and 1 in 7 wasn’t aware of it. Despite a common misconception, HIV can only be transmitted by coming into contact with infected bodily fluids such as semen, vaginal secretions, breast milk, and blood, not through casual contacts like sharing food, kissing, plates, or holding hands. HIV/AIDS is incurable, but we do have antiretroviral medications to drastically slow the progress of the illnesses and allow those with the diseases to live a long and healthy life.

Secure and Confidential STD testing services

The fastest results possbile - available in 1 to 2 days

Get Tested Today

Symptoms:

An unrelenting headache

Swollen lymph glands

Nausea and vomiting

Lack of energy

Sores or lesions

Diarrhea

Joint pain

Fever

Rash

Problems HIV/AIDS may cause:

Because HIV/AIDS destroys immune cells, the body becomes vulnerable to all kinds of infections and illnesses, as the body is no longer as capable of fighting germs off. Before the medication we have available today HIV took a major toll on the body and led to death.

    Human Papillomavirus (HPV)

At one point in time, HPV was worryingly common, but ever since the popularization of the HPV vaccine came around, the infection stopped spreading as rapidly. It’s transmitted through oral, anal, or vaginal sex with an infected person. While HPV doesn’t have an official cure (recent trials are having success but it is not yet ready for the public), the symptoms are typically treated while the infection usually goes away on its own.

Symptoms:

Genital itching

Genital lumps or bumps

Problems HPV may cause:

In most cases, HPV goes away on its own without any health complications. If it doesn’t heal and becomes chronic, genital warts and cancer are potential health issues. It can cause cervical and other cancers such as cancer of the vagina, vulva, penis, and back of the throat.

    Crabs / Pubic Lice

What are commonly knowns as “crabs,” are actually pubic lice that under a magnifying glass look a lot like the crabs you see at the beach. They’re super common, and about 3 million people get infected with pubic lice every year. Crabs are transmitted through sexual contact because they live in between pubic hair and move from one body to the other when in close contact, and although rare, they can also pass through infected linens and clothing. They’re easy to get rid of with an over-the-counter shampoo.

Symptoms:

Excessive itching in the genital area

Tiny crab-like tan or whitish gray bugs in your pubic hair

Crab eggs at the bottom of pubic hairs

Dark or bluish spots on the skin where the bites have occurred

Feeling irritable, feverish, or run-down

Problems crabs/pubic lice may cause:

Other than the annoying discomfort they cause, pubic lice are completely harmless.

  Herpes (HSV-1 & HSV-2)

Herpes is a harmless, unreasonably feared STD due to how crazy common it is. It’s most recognized as the sores or “cold sores” it typically causes above the lip (HSV-1) and/or genital area (HSV-2). It’s transmitted remarkably easily, mostly by skin to skin contact with infected areas, even if no symptoms are present. These modes of transmission are most often when kissing, or participating in vaginal, oral, or anal sex. It’s not curable, but there is medicine to manage and dramatically tone down the symptoms, intensity, and frequency.

Symptoms:

Outbreaks of itchy, painful blisters or sores that come and usually go on the:

Vulva

Vagina

Cervix

Anus

Penis

Scrotum

Butt

Lips

Mouth

Throat

Inner Thighs

Eyes or fingers, although rare

Problems herpes may cause:

Complications are rare, but they exist. Studies on Alzheimer’s are finding connections back to herpes, although the exact relationship is still under research. There have been times herpes caused meningitis (infection of the fluid and tissues that surround the spinal cord and brain) and encephalitis (inflammation of the brain), but this is notably rare. Pregnant women with herpes pose a chance of passing it to the infant during childbirth, and there is a chance of serious damage if doctors aren’t aware of the infection.

  Hepatitis B/HBV

This is an infection that affects the liver. It’s transmitted through contact with infected blood, sores, semen, and other bodily fluids. According to the CDC, rates of HBV have dropped from an average of 200,000 per year in the ’80s to around 20,000 in 2016. HPV is serious when it happens in teens and children, but usually, when adults have it, the body normally is able to fight it off. If treatment becomes necessary, it’s typically done with antiviral drugs. If you’ve already had HBV, your body has built up an immune system against it, and you won’t get it again.

Symptoms:

Belly pain

Fever

Jaundice (yellowing of the skin)

Stomach issues (loss of appetite, light-colored poop, vomiting, and nausea)

Problems HBV may cause:

HBV can cause scarring of the liver, and lead to kidney disease, blood vessel problems, liver failure, and cancer. If not eradicated, it is possible to die from a chronic HBV infection.

Now go make good choices.

You now know, if you didn’t already, the most widespread STDs in the U.S. You can make an informed decision on how often to get tested and what to worry most about. Honestly, if you just got tested once (preferably twice) a year you wouldn’t have to worry about them so much, but we can’t force you. Try as we might. You just can’t say you didn’t know. So, some might say that after reading this post, they’re gonorrhea-valuate their choices. 

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