#you can tell i'm going crazy waiting for this event when i start making random calcullations with my spreadsheets

[ousamaduo]

I'm on copium mode for Knights event (bc I'm broke and only have like 400 dias (thanks Leo)), so I decided to look through my spreadsheets to see the shortest break between events for each unit, because surely we wouldn't have a Knights event now, right, haha Izumi's event was so recent.

And uh. The shortest break so far has been 5 events between each unit event (there's 5 events between Fragrance and Sudden Death (for Knights), 5 events between Secret Service and Jun's center (for Eden), and 5 events between Sandstorm and Adonis's center (for Undead)).

It has already been 7 events since Mad Party.

I am officially in danger 💀

[sommerbueckers]

HIHI ITS 🤍 I LOVED THE LAST ONE SHOT YOU WROTE FOR MY REQUEST SO IM BEING GREEDY AND SENDING ANOTHER⁉️

so basically it’s fluff with paige finding out her gf/flirty friend?? doesn’t know how to drive/isn’t good at it and teaching her🤭🤭 just imagine paige teases her about her bad parking, hand on her thigh the whole time she tries to focus on driving, praising her when she’s doing good

need this woman SO BAD

Did y'all miss me??

HI BABY, so glad you loved the last one and I hope this one meets ur standardsssss

Paige sighed as she pulled into a gas station and parked the car. It was mostly deserted with the exception of a family that was taking their leave.

"I'll pump and you grab snacks?" she quirked a brow at you and was met with a nod.

The two of you were four hours into your adventitious road trip and you could tell Paige was getting tired. You had encouraged her to get as much rest as possible so that she'd have enough energy to make the full drive, it's not because you didn't want to drive, but because you didn't know how.

You had never learned to drive simply because you never needed to. Throughout high school you had taken the bus to and from school, your friends and parents drove you to every public event, and you never went anywhere you didn't feel absolutely inclined to. So learning to drive was never something that crossed your mind.

But sitting in the passenger seat of Paige's car with her barely able to keep her eyes open, it was the only thing on your mind.

You grabbed two Redbulls from the refrigerator section and a couple random snacks before making your way to the register. Pulling out your wallet you said, "Can I put twenty-five on pump four?"

...

"You get me Tru Fru?" Paige perked up when she noticed you approaching the car.

"Duh, a Redbull too, can't have you fallin' asleep behind the wheel," you snorted, hoping she got the message.

"About that," the blonde started, leaning in through the driver side window, "I was thinking you could take over for a little."

"Take over what?"

"Driving, what else?" she laughed.

"How am I gonna watch my show if I'm driving?"

"C'mon ma, just for a little. I just need a break."

"I told you to go to sleep last night but you wanted to watch another episode, now you have to pay the price."

"Bro," she groaned, resting her forehead on her forearms. "It's not like you were against watching another episode, you wanted to see the recoupling just as much as I did."

"Wait we need to talk about that for a moment, because that shit was crazy."

"Nah for real though! I love Mackenzie 'n' all but choosin' her over Courtney was fuckin' crazy."

"Yeah, yeah and-"

"No, stop," Paige interrupted, "you're trying to distract me from the conversation."

You sighed in defeat, "It was working for a moment," you mumbled.

"Please peach, just drive. Drive for a little and then we can switch back," she pleaded.

"Paige I can't..."

"Why not?"

"Because I-" you sighed and rubbed your hands over your face, "I can't drive."

"What do you mean?"

She was met with silence as you shook your head and leaned back, embarrassed to admit it out loud.

"Look I get that you don't want to but I don't want to drive another-"

"No, Paige I literally can't drive. Like I never learned how."

"Huh? You're jus' lyin' so you don't have to drive," she frowned.

"Dude why do you think I never drive to your house?"

"'Cus you don't have a car."

"And why do you think that is? 'Cus I can't fuckin' drive."

Paige stared silently at you, her eyes wide with shock as she processed the information. She bit the inside of her cheek and tapped her fingers against the door. When the pump popped out of the socket, she placed it back into the hold and got into the car.

She didn't start it back up, just stared at you with a teasing smile.

"You really never learned how to drive?" she asked.

"Never."

"You never wanted to learn?"

"I never needed to."

"So how did you get everywhere?"

"The same way I do now. Ubers, busses, my friends."

Paige shook her head, "I can't believe this, we gotta do somethin' about this."

...

"What is this?" you frowned, pausing your Netflix show and looking through the windshield.

"This is my course."

"Your what?"

"My driving course, where you're gonna learn how to drive," Paige said.

"Paige what? No, what're you doing?"

Paige parked the car and unbuckled her seatbelt, not answering your question as she stepped out and walked over to your side.

"Either you can get out this car willingly or I can get you out myself. You pick."

You looked up at her with pleading eyes, begging her not to make you do this. But she didn't seem to care, leaning patiently against the car door as she waited for you to get out.

"Ugh, fuck."

...

"Alright adjust your mirrors, make sure you can see your surroundings," Paige instructed.

"Oh my god, look at my eyebrows!" you frowned, running your finger across all the little hairs surrounding them.

"Focus!" Paige exclaimed, thumping your head. "Now put the car in drive."

"It won't move," you roughly tried yanking the gear stick back but it wouldn't budge. "Maybe this is a sign that we shouldn't be doing this."

"Shut that shit up," Paige snorted, "put your foot on the break and then change gears."

Once you switched the gears and let your foot off the break, the car began to move on its own. In a panic, you slammed your foot back down, jerking the car forward.

"Shit! I wasn't even pressing the gas," you frowned at the blonde.

"Yeah the car moves by itself," Paige suppressed a laugh as she nodded at you. "Just relax," she breathed out, gently rubbing her hand up and down your thigh. "You don't gotta be scared, i'm right here."

You nodded your head and gave her a smile, turning your attention back to the empty parking lot in front of you. With a deep breath, you finally eased your foot off the break.

...

"Go up more...little more. Good girl," Paige gave your thigh a light squeeze as she praised you.

You could feel your cheeks heat up at her words and you did your best to focus on driving.

"Alright now put the car in reverse and turn the wheel that way as you back up," the blonde said.

"Can't believe I'm fuckn' doing this," you breathed out through a laugh.

Paige smiled, "Doin' great baby."

Paige's hand inched higher and higher the more you backed the car into the lines. As her hand crept toward the inside of your thigh, you panically -- for the second time -- slammed your foot on the break.

"What just happened?" she asked when you parked the car.

"I got nervous," you shrugged innocently.

Paige smirked knowingly at you before unbuckling her seatbelt and getting out of the car to check your job. Her eyebrows shot to her hairline and she tilted her head, chuckling to herself.

"I don't think I've ever seen worse," she said once back in the car.

"Stop. Was it really that bad?"

"No, no," she smiled, taking your hand and placing a kiss on your knuckles, "You just need a lil practice, that's all."

"You sure? Don't lie to make me feel good," you said.

"I'm not lying."

"Okay."

A beat of silence passed before Paige spoke again.

"I have seen Drew do better though..."

"Paige!"

...

"You're not being a very good student right now," Paige whispered, using her thumb to drag your bottom lip down.

"I'm only as good as you make me," you smirked.

You softly pressed your lips against hers, smiling when you felt her hand travel to the back of your neck and hold you close.

"You're so pretty," she caressed your cheek with her other hand, "and smart...even though you can't drive."

"You are such a dick," you playfully slapped her arm, pulling away and sitting back in your seat.

She shrugged to herself and opened her bag of Tru Fru, tossing a few pieces of the chocolate into her mouth. "Next lesson."

...

"Alright so this is an intersection," Paige explained, "it's packed."

You stared blankly out at the empty parking lot, furrowing your eyebrows and then side-eyeing her.

"Art of imagination," she patted your thigh. "Now the car on the left of you was here when you got here, but the car on your right got here at the same time as you, do you know what to do?"

"The car on my left goes first," you answer.

"Right, but what about the other car? Who gets to go first?"

"Whoever presses the gas harder," you snort, only to be met with Paige's unimpressed expression. "Fine. Uh...don't they go first? I have to yield to cars on my right."

"Bro you got it!" Paige smiled.

You clapped briefly, shyly shrugging your shoulders as you looked up at her. "I think I deserve a kiss."

"Oh do you?"

"Mhm...et lite kyss," you mumbled.

"Fuck that's so sexy, say somethin' else," Paige said.

"Kom hit," you gestured for her to come here with your finger, connecting your lips in a slow kiss.

"Hmm," she hummed against your lips, "you ready to go?"

You nodded your head, "Please. Do I have to drive?"

"No, not gonna make you do that."

"Good, 'cus if you did, there'd be no kisses for you tonight."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm ashamed to admit that I am in fact a lazy son of a bitch...sorry

[elllisaaa]

ateez as love songs

-> pairing : ateez x fem!reader

-> words count : 3.7k words

-> genre : fluff, hurt/comfort

-> warnings : self depreciating thoughts, mentions of panic attacks & anxiety

-> sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language.

-> reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated !

-> author's note : i'm sooo happy to get back to this serie !! i missed writing with songs a lot so i hope you'll appreciate it as much as i did !

-> masterlist | ateez masterlist | 1k event masterlist

KIM HONGJOONG

-> Renegades by X Ambassadors

"living wild, and running free, two kids, you and me."

→ You and Hongjoong met when you moved into his neighborhood, and you immediately got along really well. He was also the only kid of your age to be around, and you had no choice but to befriend him. And you did, spending your whole childhood by his side. You did all the stupid things you could have done : skipping classes to go to the arcade or play video games together, pulling pranks on this one professor you both couldn’t stand, living your life to the fullest. But all of that crumbled when he told you that he had to go. You were happy for him, because you knew how talented he was, how much he did to pursue his dream. But you couldn’t help crying when you were alone in your bed at night. You did everything you could think of before he left, doing all the craziest things you wouldn’t have dared to do normally, so that all you remembered from him was happy memories. 

“- Promise we’ll see each other again, even when you become the biggest idol in Korea.

- Of course, I could never forget you.”

And Hongjoong held you tight in his arms, as if he didn’t want to ever let go. And if he could, he would’ve done that. Because the only thing he didn’t do before leaving was telling you how much he loved you, because he didn’t want you to spend your whole life waiting for him, and because he knew deep down that it wasn’t the end. 

"and I say hey, hey, hey, living like we’re renegades."

→ So when the two of you finally reconnected when you had finished your studies, and when Ateez had already grown big, it felt like yesterday, like Hongjoong had never left, like you were never separated. And just like when you were only kids, you started to do all these crazy things again. You had to be more careful because of his job, but it made everything even more fun, and breaking the rules even more thrilling. That was how you ended up in a random park, late at night, like when you were still in highschool, like there was no problem at all. 

“- You know, there’s one thing I wanted to do before leaving that I never did. 

- What was it ?

- This.”

And Hongjoong leaned in to kiss you, and you let him. Because even if he didn’t ask you to wait for him, you did. Because even if you didn’t know if he loved you, you couldn’t love anyone else. And now that you found each other again, he will not let go. Because you were the only person making him feel so alive, so free, so happy. Because he was the only one for you, and you were the only one for him.

PARK SEONGHWA

-> Say Something by Kodaline

"you can lean on me when it’s hard to breathe, you can call me anytime, so please say something to me."

→ Seonghwa knew when he started to go out with you that you had some trouble expressing your emotions, that it was not easy for you to say when you needed help. And he was okay with that, he knew that everyone couldn’t be as open about their feelings as he was. But sometimes, he wished you knew you could count on him, sometimes he wished he could do more for you. 

“- Baby, please, talk to me. I can see that you’re not doing good, I just want to be there for you.

- But I don’t want to bother you Hwa, I don’t want you to think I’m weak.

- Crying doesn’t make you weak my love, it means you’re letting go of your emotions, and it’s a good start okay ? I’m here for you, anytime.”

And that was true. Everytime you needed something, Seonghwa was there. Everytime you needed someone, Seonghwa was there. He was always there. And the feeling of being understood, of being heard was something so soothing you never wanted to let him go. 

“- You’re one of the best things that happened to me, you know.”

Seonghwa simply smiled and kissed your forehead, because you were the best thing that happened to him too, and he was glad to see you grow and open up to the world. 

"i’d do time for you, i would lie for you, i would die for you."

→ “- You’re sure I’m not crashing your plans ?

- Not at all baby, I was only going to watch a movie and I’d rather spend my night with you than alone. I’ll be over soon.”

Whenever a panic attack hit you, you had the habit of dealing with it by yourself, using techniques you had learned back when you were a teenager to calm down. But ever since you met Seonghwa, you grew familiar to his presence, to his comforting aura. And everytime you were suffering from your anxiety, the only person who was able to help you breathe more easily was him. 

“- I’m sorry to bother you again, Hwa.”

But he only shook his head at you, his soft fingers caressing your cheeks tenderly. You were never a burden to him, on the contrary. He loved to spend time with you, he loved to take care of you, and even if he wished he could magically get rid of all your pain for you, he was glad you knew that you could lean on him anytime. Because he would give up everything for you, because he loved you.

“- You’re never bothering me. Never. I only want you to feel better.

- I’m feeling good now that you’re here.”

And that was all he needed to know. 

JEONG YUNHO

-> Wherever You Are by Kodaline

"wherever you are, that’s where i’ll be."

→ Yunho loved going on tour, he loved being on stage, he loved these moments, and he loved meeting atinys. But there was only one thing missing - you. He wanted you to come along with them, but it was impossible because of your job. And despite both of your busy schedules, you always found a way to call each other everyday, no matter the time differences and if it was day or night. 

“- How is it going so far ?

- It’s so good. I’m so glad I didn’t give up on what I wanted because even if it’s hard sometimes, I’m truly happy.”

And that was obvious from the smile on his face every time he talked to you about a new city he visited, everytime he updated you about what happened at tonight’s concert. He was made to be on a stage, he was made to spread the same happiness he gave to you every time you were with him.

“- But I miss you, angel. I can’t wait to go home to you.”

You couldn’t wait for that too, because the apartment was so empty without him, because your home was not a place but a person. It was him.

"we get carried away in emotion, we get lost in each other’s eyes."

→ The lazy weekends you spent at home with your boyfriend might be your favorites. You didn’t need to go out every day to know that he loved you, in fact, just laying in bed while reading or watching a show you both knew by heart felt even better. Because it was another proof of how you didn't need to change yourself for him, how you knew he would always love you for you.

“- Why are you looking at me like that ?

- You’re just so beautiful, angel… Sometimes I can’t even believe you’re mine.”

You tried to control the blush spreading on your face, but Yunho could feel your warmth as he caressed your cheeks. And his smile widened at how cute you were. 

“- You’re saying that as if you’re not so damn handsome yourself.

- Well, I’ve never denied that.”

You rolled your eyes at him, but you couldn’t hold your giggles for much longer, letting him kiss you even if both of you couldn’t stop smiling like fools in love. And you were. So in love that sometimes it was overwhelming, but one look at each other was enough to remind you that it perfectly made sense in the end. 

KANG YEOSANG

-> Pretty Boy by The Neighborhood

"even if my heart stops beating, you’re the only thing i need, ooh, with me."

→ “- Will you be home late tonight ?

- Uh, I don’t know Yeo, I have a lot of things to do. But do you want me to come home earlier ?

- I don’t want to bother you though.”

But he was never bothering you. Ever. And it was rare for Yeosang to ask for your comfort like that. Usually, it would only show in his gestures, and you would take the hint and cuddle him until he was totally relaxed. But you knew that when he was telling you directly, he really needed your help. 

“- You’re sure you don’t want me to run you a bath ?”

Your boyfriend shook his head, nuzzling his head further in your neck and his grip around your waist tightening as if he feared that you would get up and walk away. 

“- Yes, I just need you.”

You smiled softly and started to run your fingers through his hair again. Hearing his breathing become more regular and feeling him unwind in between your arms had to be the best feeling ever. Knowing that he only wanted you, and that you only wanted him only reinforced the conviction that you could only be soulmates. 

"as long as i got you, yeah, i’m not afraid to die, i’m alright."

→ “- You’ll warn me whenever there’s a jumpscare right ?”

You nodded at your boyfriend as you settled back in his arms, wrapping the blanket around the two of you as he started the horror movie you’ve wanted to watch together for some time. Despite Yeosang knowing very well that he was not a fan of the genre, he wanted to do it for you and see if maybe he could end up liking it. 

“- Can we… stop the movie baby ?”

You immediately grabbed the remote tv and paused the film before handing it to him, pecking his lips as you smiled at him tenderly.

“- We can watch the rest of it another day, or not at all. It’s up to you. And it’s your turn to choose something to watch.”

Maybe that someone else would have made fun of him for being so sensitive to horror movies, but you didn’t, you never did. You simply accepted it, accepted him without any questions. That was one of the many reasons he loved you, because there were at least a thousand, so much that it would take days to note them down. And every time you did something like this, he added some more to the neverending list.

CHOI SAN

-> Say Yes To Heaven by Lana Del Rey

"if you dance i’ll dance, and if you don’t, i’ll dance anyway."

→ You always loved to see San dance, his moves and his flow always hypnotizing you each time. Whenever you witnessed him dancing, you couldn’t tear your eyes away from him. And even after all the time you’ve been together, he still struggled to accept your compliments on his dancing, sometimes you’ll even have to beg him to let you come see him practice or perform. 

“- You did so good, baby ! I’m so proud of you.”

Despite San being all sweaty and still a little breathless from the intense exercise, you still hugged him tightly, letting only you hear his quiet “thank you”’s. He received countless praises about his skills, but yours always hit different for some reasons. Maybe because you were the person he estimated the most.

“- If only you would let me teach you one of our dances, you’ll see you’re even better than me. 

- That’s impossible, you’re the best Sannie.”

He always had to turn your nice words against you, praising you instead. But your smile every time you did so was the greatest gift he could receive. And finally convincing you to let him teach you some moves made him the happiest man alive - it was the first step to get you to dance with him the day he will marry you after all. 

"i’ve got my eye on you, say yes to heaven, say yes to me."

→ San had always been very careful, never when it came to him, but when it was you, it was a whole different story. He was the type to put his hand over the sharp edges when you could bump into them, or to notice that you had an eyelash on your cheek, just because he was always looking after you, because he was always looking at you. 

“- What is all that Sannie ?”

You looked at all the snacks covering your coffee table, your heating pads ready with your favorite blanket on the couch and your comfort movie already on the tv. And then you looked back at your boyfriend with tears in your eyes.

“- Don’t cry, love. I just noticed that you were not doing good and then I realized you were going to have your periods.

- And you did that for me ? I’m gonna marry you someday, I swear.”

San grinned at your words, only answering that he was only waiting for you to do it. But he couldn’t help thinking back to the ring hidden in his socks drawer, waiting there until he had planned everything because you deserved the best proposal ever. The only thing he was sure of was that you were going to say yes and he couldn’t wait for this moment. 

SONG MINGI

->That’s So Us by Allie X

"what i like about you baby is how you annoy me daily, but you still fucking amaze me, that’s so us."

→ Even when you were still friends, Mingi and you used to text each other non stop throughout the day. No matter if it was only to update each other on what you ate for lunch, or that you saw a kid fall on the street, it felt good to know that you were the first person you thought about all day long. And now that you were dating, it didn’t change - and it even got worse - but you didn’t mind it. 

“- Isn’t it annoying how much you’re texting all the time ?”

Mingi gave a judging look to Jongho, and you couldn’t help but laugh at it as you came back to watching the video still playing on your boyfriend’s phone.

“- No, never. It feels like she’s with me even when I don’t get to see her.”

Jongho fake gaged, as if he wasn’t the one encouraging Mingi to confess to you back then. But you didn’t mind the playful bantering, it was funny. And you totally got what your boyfriend meant. It wasn’t always easy to see him leaving for tours so often, but whenever he was sending you eight photos per hour to keep you updated on his day, it felt like you were traveling with him and it helped when you missed him too much. And you didn’t get how he could still manage to make you laugh, but he did and you never wanted him to stop. 

"and i sing in the car while you’re playing air guitar, that’s so you, that’s so me, that’s so us."

→ “- What are you doing ?”

But Mingi was already running ahead of you to reserve a place on the swings for the two of you. You couldn’t help laughing as you joined him, ignoring the bad looks you were getting from all the people and parents at seeing a 6 feet man sitting on a kids’ swings.

“- Come here, baby, push me !”

He was almost too big to sit on them, but he managed to anyway, and now you had to find a way to help him move even if you could barely push him. 

“- I can’t Mingi !

- Sit on my lap then.”

So you did, and he held you with one arm as he made the swing move by himself. Your giggles mingled and it was silly but you felt so happy you felt like your heart could burst.

“- Wanna get ice cream ?”

You had barely answered “yes”, and Mingi was already standing up, holding you bridal style and running to find the closest ice cream stand. Whenever you hang out with him, it was like you lived a second childhood and you loved it just as much as his smile when he saw you play along in his antics. 

JUNG WOOYOUNG

-> Never Be The Same by Camilla Cabello

"suddenly i’m a fiend, and you’re all i need, all i need."

→ You’ve always dreamt about having a boyfriend who would be literally obsessed with you, who couldn’t get enough of you. And you didn’t think you would end up being the one getting crazy over a man. But here you were, watching Wooyoung do his skincare with hearts in your eyes. 

“- I can feel you staring at me, baby.”

His smirk was eating up his face as you looked at each other through the reflection in the mirror. He did that everytime you were simping over him, never letting go of the fact that you loved him that much.

“- And what if I was, uh ? What would you do ?”

Wooyoung turned around, with his cute, fluffy headband still holding his hair out of his face. It was difficult to take him seriously like that, but he looked adorable. He got closer to where you were sitting on top of the washing machine, cupping your face with his hands.

“- This.”

And he kissed you, love pouring from this gesture that made you melt down on the spot. He always managed to make your heart flutter and your cheeks blush without even trying. But you knew that he was equally as obsessed with you, because once he got a taste of your lips, he had to kiss you at least a hundred more times to be satisfied. 

"you’re to blame, just one hit of you i knew i’ll never, ever, ever be the same."

→ Love at first sight was never a thing that Wooyoung believed in. It was cool and romantic on a screen, but in real life, he thought that there was no way it could ever happen, especially to him. That was until he got introduced to you. When he crossed your eyes for the first time, he was hit by the realization that yes, it did in fact exist, and that it happened to him. 

“- Do you think we’re soulmates in every universe ?

- You think we’re soulmates ?”

Wooyoung wanted to kiss your cute pout away and assure you that if there was a word stronger than soulmate, it would be what he would call you.

“- Of course we’re soulmates, we’re literally a match made in heaven.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at how silly he could be sometimes, but you loved it that way. Because the first time you met him, and that he froze in front of you with his jaw hitting the floor was the day you fell for him, and you wouldn’t want it any other way.

CHOI JONGHO

-> Chasing Cars by Sleeping At Last

"if i lay here, if i just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world."

→ Sometimes, Jongho didn’t want to talk. And sometimes, he was anxious that you would get bored when you were hanging out with him. It was not that he didn’t want to tell you all about his day, it was just that he needed some silence, or that he didn’t have the energy to do so. 

“- Do you want me to tell you what happened today ?”

Everytime, Jongho would nod and instead of talking, he would listen to your soothing voice while he ran his hand through your hair. That was all he needed to relax after a long and exhausting day. 

“- And then you won’t believe what she did, baby ! She literally ate the yogurt I had put my name on !”

You didn’t force him to react, you didn’t ask anything from him because you knew he was listening, that he was paying attention. Sometimes, you were worried about talking too much, but never when you were with Jongho. And even when the both of you needed some silence, it was never awkward. You just did your own things or cuddled, kissing each other sometimes and just enjoying each other's presence. Whenever you were together, it was like a little bubble that protected you both from the world. 

"those three words are said too much, they’re not enough."

→ Words had never been Jongho’s main way to express his emotions. Often, he struggled with it. And you never had a problem with it, appreciating every gift and gesture he offered you because you knew it was his way to say he loved you. Sometimes, he was a little envious of how easily you showed your adoration to him, and he wanted to return it in some kind of way. 

“- You really spent months on that, just for me ?”

The tears in your eyes as he made you listen to the song he had been working on for you made him want to protect you from the cruel world forever. 

“- Yes. I always feel like I don’t tell you enough how much I love you, and sometimes I feel like this is not enough to express what I feel for you.”

Without thinking about it, you threw yourself in his arms, smiling when you heard him giggling as he held you against him. 

“- You didn’t have to, but I love it so much, I’m gonna listen to it every hour of every day from now on.”

The smile on his lips was so bright that you almost had to close your eyes. But the view was so perfect that you didn’t want him to stop any time soon. And even if he didn’t say it everyday, you knew he loved you and you would never trade what you had against anything else.

-> i don't allow any copies, reposts or translations of my work.

ateez taglist (fill in this to be added) :

@sharonxdevi @hann1bee @lil-kpopstan @riraives @lichyuu @foxinnie8 @lovelyuyu

1k event taglist (fill in this to be added) :

@emmaluvsjisung

[drdemonprince]

Probably a trivial question during a shitty time globally, but I'm going a bit crazy trying to figure this out and need help.

For some reason, people cancel last-minute alarmingly frequently when I host gatherings on days that are extremely important to me. I am talking mainly about my birthday and that of my partner but also a huge milestone graduation do last year was a nightmare as well. Neither I nor my partner have any meaningful relationships with our families anymore due to political differences and rely on our friends for the sense of home and belonging most people get from families.

Except this is a bit of a wasteland, as I struggle to form and maintain close friendships because of how unreliable and disappointing people have been for a while. This is not an individual (although there are a couple of people who I know will cancel every time) but a pattern. Someone will forget to book the right train ticket, another will only lurk on the event group chat and then comment for the first time before the event to say no. One person memorably just said they wanted to keep the option of a weekend gateway open so they could only come to my graduation party if they decided not to do that. Am I missing something here? Is this normal? I need consistency and dependability to feel safe and I feel like people I'd normally choose as friends (witty, nerdy interests, progressive) turn out to be incredibly bad at showing up for me when I need them. A friend I thought was close went completely mum after I graduated and didn't congratulate me at all - after having discussed the degree and its struggles with me for 2 years. Part of me feels like I need to rebuild my circle from scratch and maybe find people I can talk to honestly about my needs from the beginning of the friendship. But it feels so late and desolate to start this process in my mid-thirties. Everyone else has friends they grew up with and who know everything about their lives. Meanwhile, I am at the stage where I have no close friends at all anymore because my needs seem too absurd to even discuss with anyone except my partner, and if I do, I just lose friendships. I remember reading your piece on how to do social things as an autistic person last year and feeling very inspired so I thought I'd reach out to you.

This is all exceedingly, exceedingly normal, especially in the days post COVID for a variety of reasons. When I make plans with people, I assume that roughly 30-75% of the people invited are not going to show up, and I've completely made my peace with that. A friend of mine hosted a movie night a few weeks back, invited I believe around 15 people, and ultimately four showed up, many people being last-minute cancellations or total no shows.

This happens for a variety of reasons. Many people are very socially anxious and decide at the last minute they don't have it in them to show up because they're freaking out. Other people say yes when the event is days or weeks down the line, wanting in the abstract to be there, but then on the actual day of the event, practical daily life constraints are far more visible than they were when the event was just an idea, and so then they have to bail. Other people feel really bad saying no, and so they wait for the last minute to share that they can't make it. And lots of people are so bombarded with notifications on a variety of social media sites and chatting platforms that they just forget all that they've committed to. And then you add into that random illness, flat tires, crying kids, and the like, and you have a lot of reasons why people don't show up to things.

Personally, I have come to accept this. If I go into event planning assuming most people can't make it, my feelings aren't hurt. Every person who does show up is a gift. My invites are an opportunity, a true invitation, not an obligation or an expectation. I don't hurt my feelings in advance by telling myself that I need a high turnout for my birthday or that because I've worked hard making a certain dish for a party (I never actually do that admittedly lol) that a lot of people need to come and eat it.

And I invite people that I like and want to see, over and over again, because I care about them, and I want to show them that I care about them and that I understand they have other things going on and I am not offended that life got in the way for them. I want them to feel loved and included, even if they can't make it. Even the gesture of inviting a person to an event and them showing some interest is a meaningful act of maintaining social connections, for me. And so if they can't make it on the day of, that's fine by me.

I'm 35. My friends are anywhere from 21 to 60-something. People cancel events because of sick kids, broken down cars, long work weeks, depression, double-bookings, writing deadlines, social anxiety, busted ankles, not wanting to see one person they're currently having a difficult situation with, and any number of other factors. If you love people long enough, they get really complicated and their lives get really hard. I find that the most beautiful and friendship-sustaining thing one can do is to not take it personally, because you're going to need that same grace yourself plenty of times. People will drop of the map for months or years sometimes because they're going through hell, and you dont to deprive yourself of being open to reconnection when they're available again.

There's really no need to read anything into the randomness of life. This stuff will happen, so it's rational to expect it, and loving to not mind it too much.

Do you need to make some new friends? Maybe so! I have multiple different friend groups and I think that's healthy. You may find the no-shows less painful if you have more people to lean on. It's always good to form new connections, learn new things about yourself, expand your skills and understanding of the world through new information and experiences. But should you start over, and ditch your friends who are flakey? I don't think so. To be loved is to be sometimes flaked upon (and to flake). In this capitalistic, individualistic hellscape it's vitally important that we extend one another grace.

[the-offside-rule]

Trent Alexander-Arnold (Liverpool) - Mastermind

Requested: nope it was an idea I couldn't get out of my head

Prompt: Mastermind by Taylor Swift

Warnings: cursing ig??

Trent and his girlfriend of two years, Y/n were driving on the motorway, on their way to the airport. The motorway was super long and Y/n was struggling to even stay awake. "You have to wake up babe, we're gonna be there in like twenty minutes." Trent told her. "But I'm tired and I think we've talked about everything under the sun." She yawned. Trent thought an thought about a conversation starter. Aha! "We haven't talked about how we met." He smiled, remembering the memory. “It’s crazy, inni?” he chuckled. “Not crazy, more so it’s just how we met.” She yawned again.

"Honestly though, it was like a one in a million chance of us actually meeting and it actually happened. You know how mad that is?" Trent asked, fiddling with his controller. Y/n scoffed but continued reading her book. "What?" He asked. When he didn't get a reply, he grew concerned. "What'd ye do tha' for? It was a one in a million kinda thing." She looked up at him with an arched brow. "Yeah, you keep telling yourself that." As his girlfriend read on, Trent started to think about why she thought otherwise. He set his controller to the side and turned back around to her. "Explain how it wasn't then." Y/n closed her book and reached over to leave it on the coffee table. "I planned it all." Trent's face turned to one of confusion. "I don't know what you mean."

"I planned us meeting, I planned me 'bumping into you', I planned everything." Trent crossed his arms and leaned back, awaiting his girlfriend to continue on with her so called plan came into play. "Well, it started back when I broke into the Liverpool private event with Tina."

"We can't break into this party" Tina said, hooking arms with Y/n as they walked down the streets together on a cold night in Liverpool. "Um, yes we fucking can. I know people." Y/n replied. "But there'll only be the players and random girls who paid loads to get in." Y/n turned to her friend with a grin. "And we won't have to spend a penny." Tina unlinked arms eith Y/n. "How'd you mean?"

"Well walk with me and you'll find out."

"Alright, you planned on breaking in but how did you plan on getting with me. I could've been sat at me mum's for all you knew." Trent questioned. "Well I didn't know. I only got the great idea when I saw you pushing some girls away."

"Look, over there! Do you know who that is, Tina?" Tina shook her head. "Tina, that is Trent Alexander-Arnold." Tina nodded. "The guy that's your phone background?" An idea popped into Y/n's mind. A wild, crazy yet brilliant idea. "Hold on." Tina looked bewildered as to what her friend was doing but soon enough she'd find out. "Tada!" Y/n handed her phone to Tina. "What's different about it?" Y/n scooched beside her friend and so hatched the masteplan. "Well Tina, if you open it you'll see a picture I took with my family last Christmas." Tina sipped on her cocktail, still quite confused. "Well, when I go and talk to him, I'm gonna get a snap from someone and of course, my phone is gonna light up. He's gonna see my lockscreen, see my dog and say its a cute dog. I'm gonna say I have more photos and because he'd feel out of place to tell me no, he's gonna watch me open my phone nd see the picture of my family. Now-"

"Wait, wait, wait. Who is?"

"Who's what?"

"Who's going to see your lockscreen?"

"Trent. God keep up Tina." Tina stopped functioning for a moment. "And how are you going to talk to him? Approach him, like?" She asked. "Well, I'm glad you asked that. You see those three girls hanging around him?" Tina nodded. "I'm going to do him a favour and pretend I'm his girlfriend to tell them he's off the market." Y/n explained. "But he's single."

"Yes, but they don't know any better. So, he's gonna see the photo of my family and one of two things is going to happen. He's going to either see that and make a self conscious note to himself that I'm a family oriented person or he's going to ask about them to politely decline seeing the dog photos." Tina shook her head, a grin on her face. "You're mad, you know." She mumbled. "Good, because otherwise his wouldn't have worked." Y/n replied. "But it hasn't yet." Tina said, almost questioninvinstead of stating. "Well it's going to."

"So then what?" Trent asked. "You know exactly what. You're acting as if you weren't there." She laughed. "Nah, come on. Tell me the thought process behind all this."

Trent was getting uncomfortable. His teammates even tried to pretend he had a girlfriend, but the other girl wasnt buying it. Trent had told her he wasnt interested but she claimed it was 'playing haard to get' which was simply untrue, he was genuinely didn't like her. He was about to go and leave when he heard a girls voice walking over. "Hey baby. Sorry I'm late, got held up." Trent looked up to see a beaming woman looking between him and another woman. It was clear to him that she was trying too help him, so he accepted the help. "Who's this?" She asked. Trent grinned and looked over to the other girl. "Nobody, shes just leaving." The girl took the hint and moved away,

Her phone flashed on the bar. Trent looked down and smiled upon seeing a dog. "Nice dog." He said. Y/n looked up towards the defender. "Oh you think so? Hold on, I've a few more pictures if you want to see them." Trent didnt think it was in his place to say no, especially from someone who just got rid of the other girl. "Alright, sure." Y/n smiled and opened her phone to reveal a lock screen of her family, all in christmas jumpers. "Ah, is that your family?" He asked. "Y/n smiled and nodded. "It is! We decided too wear ugly jumpers for Christmas last year, and every other year it seems." Trent chuckled. "Do they live in Liverpool?" He asked. "Nope. I only meet them for Christmas."

"Aw well I'm sorry about that. They seem really nice." Trent said, smiling. "Oh yeah. So what about your family?"

"And you told me about your family, the conversation changed to football, then our personal lives and before you know it, you gave me your snap and your number because you wouldnt get messaging me on instagram. Your words not mine." Y/n said triumphantly. "I have a lot of things to say to that." Trent mumbled. Y/n swallowed the lump in her throat as the triumph washed away. Did she just fuck up her relationship by revealing her plan? "Like what?" She asked. "First off, it was a decent plan,but secondly, I knew it was a plan. All along, I knew you planned it." Y/n froze. "What?"

"Ah come on. Hendo came to us a couple minutes before you came in, saying that theres gonna be a fan coming in because she works at the bar and that if theres any problems with her, let the staff know." Her eyebrows knotted in confusion. "The second I saw you, I knew you were the fan. Then when you came over, you went and saved me, then your phone was slightly tilted towards me so I could see your dog. I knew you wanted me to ask so I did. I just didnt expect you whipping out the photos which led to me asking about your family instead, which is probably the only unpredictable thing you'd done that night." Y/n was gobsmacked. Predictable? Her? "Oh please, I dont see you trying to be unpredictable." She mumbled looking out the car window. "Well actually, I dont think you expected this." Y/n rolled her eyes and turned to question him, but was faced with a beautiful velvet box. "Are you serious?" She asked. "Dead."

"You're not asking me to." Trent chuckled. "Y/n Y/l/n, would you make me the happiest man on the motorway and marry me?" Y/n’s eyes had filled with tears, her hands had covered her face. “Oh don’t get all soppy on me now.” Trent chuckled. “Show us your hand.” Y/n put her hand out as trent slipped the delicate ring onto her finger. “How’s that for a plan?” he joked. “I did not expect that, that’s for sure.” she smiled, not taking her eyes off it. “I do love you, yunno.” Trent took her hand and placed a kiss on it. “I love you too.”

[fictional-love-is-my-life]

AAAAAH Im so excited your requests are open, love your writing! Could I get headcanons for how Optimus, Bee, and Mirage (during the events of rotb) would react to finding out the reader has been hiding that they're actually a shapeshifter (let's say they can turn into a big wolf, or something like the light fury from httyd, like a limited range of creatures they've seen depending on what they need atm to fight or be stealthy, and have advanced abilities in general and such), they've been secretly sneaking out and destroying terrorcon communications/base stuff at night in an attempt to help the autobots, but not telling anyone because she thought they disliked humans (like she knows mirage and bee are friendly, but the team wanna leave earth asap and there's Optimus' whole sentiment of not trusting) and they notice because she keeps dissapearing at night, getting random injuries she hides, and is always tired. She also has feelings for the bot, but hides it since she thinks it's unrequited, but maybe they've kinda had some moments together already (y'know like prolonged moments of touch, like how charlie touched bee's face gently a lot lol but reader instead) but she just thought they were being friendly.

Sorry if this is too specific or long, i just think it would be really neat to explore how they'd react in a situation like that, since I think Optimus most of all would be shocked at a human helping them for nothing in return and having similarities to them. I think it'd be a fitting situation for their personalities tbh. Thanks and I'm excited to see your thoughts! >:D

-🦊

Thank you!!

Bumblebee:

Bee began to notice something was different, but he couldn't tell what. You were always tired even though you had been resting the day before. And he could swear you had a new bruise each week. But whenever he asked you dismissed it. He let it go thinking you would tell him if you wanted to.

Curiosity got the best of him and he was too suspicious to let it go. He stayed awake one night, thinking you must be doing something at night. His suspicions were correct when he saw you sneaking out. He followed you, all the way to a terrorcon tower. He was confused, wondering why you would possibly go there. He didn't know what a human could do to it.

Then he watches you shapeshift into a form able to take the tower down. Bee is surprised and astonished, for a few moments he just watches you. After the initial shock wore off Bee decided to confront you.

He walked over to you, catching your attention. He asked why you never told him. He would have wanted to know.

He listens to your explanation and understands. Optimus has been quite vocal about wanting to leave. He apologizes for making you feel like you couldn't tell him. He reassures you that he does like humans, and he likes you. He states that now he knows about you he'd like to team up and work together on future missions.

Now that he knows he has a lot of questions, he wants to know all the forms that you can turn into. He decides to go out each night with you and uses it as an excuse to spend more time with you and get to know you better.

Mirage:

He could have sworn he saw a creature, every night he definitely saw something. But he couldn't say what, and he had no proof so no one believed him.

One day he saw the figure again and this time tried to chase after it. He follows the creature to a secluded area and traps it, wanting to get proof. The creature shifts back into you in your human form.

Mirage is amazed for several reasons. He's stunned that you can shapeshift and impressed that you have been helping.

He has so many questions and tries to ask you all of them.

He wants to thank you for the help you've given, but also ask you to start including him in your adventures. He wants to get to know you and all that you can do. He'd love to compare your shapeshifting ability with his own.

He also wants to show you off to the others to show that he isn't crazy but he will wait until you are ready to tell the others.

Optimus:

He was very suspicious as to who was secretly helping them and why they hadn't show themselves. Which is why he often went patrolling to see if he could catch the culprit.

Eventually, he saw you. He can understand why you never showed your true form, for the same reason he never showed himself to humans. What he doesn't understand is why you would help them. What was in it for you to help them?

He confronts you, asking why you would put yourself at risk to help them when gaining nothing? He assumes there must be something you want, and is greatly surprised to find out you did it just for them and for nothing else.

He has to take a second to process and acknowledge that his thinking of all humans was wrong. He still won't trust all of them blindly, but he has to realize that there are some good ones out there.

He won't tell anyone your secret, happy to protect that information.

He still worries about letting you help, more for the fact that he is worried you could get hurt. He doesn't want you to get injured on his behalf. But if you truly wish to lend a hand, then he will accept it and he will be grateful for your teamwork.

[reviviscencegruiform]

Tell the story. Tell the story, it was such a beautiful moment. It has to be shared with the world.

//Alright. So this happened at Vidcon in 2000...what? 2016? Maybe 2014? To set the scene, we were a small horde of mentally ill 18 to 20 somethings that had all hyped one another up the previous night while drinking to go on a stupid nature walk for our stupid mental health because we were dead bored with the con. That was a whole other random chimp event because what caused it is it's own story, anyway- we piled into two separate cars and in one car was me, my boyfriend Jon, and our friends Chris, Zach, and Hunter. Maybe one other person, I don't remember, but we got turned around somehow.

We ended up going around and around this lake in the middle of Anaheim when it was 108°F outside and we just could not figure out how to get to the park from the google maps directions and it turns out it was because we kept driving past this gate and that was the way to the park. It wasn't supposed to be locked, but more on that later. On our maybe, eeeeh, 4th? circle of the lake we stop at the gate and send out the resident Irishman, Chris, into the heat to check and see if the gate was just closed and we were stupid. No, it was locked, we weren't stupid and this road is so small you can not turn around and it's miles long so we're like "Well, now what? The other guys are waiting on us."

For this next part you need to know that there are several multi-million dollar mansions surrounding this man-made lake.

Well, the appearance of Chris at the gate and our driving around, apparently the wrong way, summoned the most wretched angry old man from the ether, no one saw him coming. He just appeared like he used instant transmission fueled by his privileged rage alone.

So this guy starts SCREAMING at us. Like whole hog screeching at us about it. No one can understand what the hell he's saying and so Jon opens the door to try to explain and Chris gets in the car saying "Don't, don't, he's crazy. Just get in the car." and he was right because this old guy moves to stand in front of the car saying "I'm going to call the cops! I'm going to call the cops! There's a gate right there. Go out through the gate!" and we're like "It's locked." and he says "No! Why are you here?" and we said "Google maps told us to go here." and he says "I think you're lying. Do you think I'm stupid? Are you stupid or am I stupid? I'm going to call the cops!" I remember that part very specifically because it took every ounce of willpower from everyone in the car not to answer his question honestly. Then Jon has to do this near entirely off road five point turn to get us out of there because that guy would not move unless it was to get in front of the car again. We managed to find a whole other way to the park that was actually the exit to the park because that closed and locked gate was the real entrance, but because of that lake road it turns out people just use the exit.

We meet up with the others and we're telling them about what happened in a "You will not believe what just happened to us" kind of way and lo and behold that same old man comes walking up the path and makes a point to walk through our group, that isn't standing on the main path mind you. That old guy must have known he fucked up because he didn't say shit and was coming from the direction of the locked gate and I guess this goblin glaring at us all was just too much for Jon because he looks that old man right in the eye and calls him a bitch.

That old man starts screaming again "I'm calling the cops! The cops are coming! The cops are coming!" They never came by the way, we were there for hours after this on our stupid nature walk and not even one showed up, but anyway all I can say for Jon is he was a struggling alcoholic at the time so this opportunity presented itself for him to unleash the beast and so he did. "Shut up you old wrinkly bitch! You are going to die. You are old. You are going to get a heatstroke and die! It's over for you! Fuck off!" and the old guy said something else, I don't remember what, but that made Jon speak the legendary "Fuck you! Fuck where you came from!" And then he told him to suck his dick.

Now, I was mortified. Zach was on the ground cackling and Chris was holding his knees trying not to be on the ground cackling. Everyone else was somewhere between those two stages. "Oh my God, why did you say that?" and Jon was like "I know ten people exactly like that, that I had to deal with when I was a kid so now that I'm an adult and can do whatever the fuck I want I'm going to. It's good to tell old losers who try to take advantage of that to fuck with you and ruin your day to fuck off and remind them they ain't shit and are going to die soon. Sometimes they forget about that and you have to humble them."

I don't know when the old man left, he did at some point, but we went on our walk and the whole time we were like a shuffling group of roman senators debating over the ethics of reminding the elderly that death approaches. It was just one of those bonding, but cringe young adult moments that no one, but the present parties holds dear.//

[woagitsasecret]

Snap back from a panic attack Am I hallucinating? Going crazy? Gotta relax I gotta make sense of the current events I put the headset on, there's something wrong I can't remember anything Who are you? Who am I? What the hell's my ****ing name? Is it true? Did I die? Can somebody please explain? I'm not supposed to be here Can someone just show me the door?

(We've got a new forever friend) What's this place? Who's talking to mе? Did you say forever? (Who wants to tell him he's condemned?) I must be dreaming, tell me

It's started sinking in, we're never leaving Entertainers in the show that never ends Try not to panic when you can't understand That you're a player on the stage And now the curtain won't go down Try not to think about how long you've been here It might get easier with every year you spend Trapped in the circus You know, it might just work if you can try not to go insane

Break out, now I'm trying to hide From something like I've never seen, I think I'm losing my mind I gotta get help, or do I think of myself? I swear I saw a doorway out of here, wait Corridor after door after door, it never ends How can there still be more? Having trouble comprehending just what kind of hell I'm in I'm losing hope, how can I open one more door?

(Well, well!) Look at you in the void all alone Thought you found another exit door (No spoilers!) Back to the show, nowhere to go Try to follow better order to the letter (Have an adventure!) What you saw was another work in progress In the office for this offense Could be trouble, but I'm feeling gracious Now in any case, we gotta get you into place Get a smile on your face (It's showtime!)

Can you retain some control of your brain? That's why I set this whole thing up Why not just try to play along? Can you be patient, it can't be explained It's kinda complicated, can you wait a minute or a couple of years?

I can't remember who I am (That's completely normal) (What's a name? A bunch of random letters!) They tell me I'm forever damned! (Let's have some fun, it's not that bad) Hey, watch your language!

It's started sinking in, we're never leaving Entertainers in the show that never ends Try not to panic when you can't understand That you're a player on the stage And now the curtain won't go down Try not to think about how long you've been here It might get easier with every year you spend Trapped in the circus You know, it might just work if you can try not to go insane

I don't think I can go on (Stay with us, my dear) Don't want to lose myself (You know you're stuck with us here) I'll try putting a show on (That's the spirit, come on) I'll try biding my time (Wait, no, that's not what I meant at all!) I'll find a way out of here (No, you've gotta stay here forever!) I'll never stop (I mean it, you're stuck!) I'll never give up on life (Stop singing!) I'll get out of this place tonight (My god, it's beautiful!) Or tomorrow, this horrible hell (This is heart-wrenching) Can't hold me forever! (You're still going, huh?) Whenever I get the chance! (Okay)

Ah, hahaha, ah, hahaha, ahaha That's hilarious!

(Whoa, oh-oh, oh) It's started sinking in, we're never leaving Entertainers in the show that never ends Try not to panic when you can't understand That you're a player on the stage And now the curtain won't go down Try not to think about how long you've been here It might get easier with every year you spend Trapped in the circus You know, it might just work if you can try not to go insane

[1d1195]

I tend to keep a lot of my "vulnerable" feelings a bit bottled up lol BUT I am working on that lol I of course appreciate you sooo much! Even before I claimed the 💜emoji, I HEAVILY related to your MC's like there were so many similarities in their personality and struggles that for a second got a little TOO REAL lol And to know you put alot of yourself into your stories and characters it felt nice to know that I wasn't alone in feeling like that. Sometimes it feels like something is so wrong with me when it gets tough so knowing that my feelings aren't so strange made/makes me feel alright :) idk if any of that made sense lol

omg don't even get me started when parents trauma dump 😭 idk if i mentioned this before or not but Im first gen Mexican American so literally Mexican parents/elders will literally tell you the most TRAUMATZING stories/experiences then go to say shit like "it's okay, thank god we are better now😁" LIKE HELLO!? WE NEED TO UNPACK THAT?!

I often think if I would be "happier" if I had just chosen a semester school bc I despise this horrid system lol But youre so kind, you have no idea😭

OMG YOU THINK I HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE??? thats crazy bc I feel like mine isn't too crazy or fun lol I have a small core group of friends but the majority of them aren't in school and the friends I do have in college i feel like I rarely seem them due to all of us being so busy lol But ngl i do love going to the free events there like concerts and drag shows WHICH ARE MY FAVE!!! but even then hanging out can sometimes be a little draining for me but once again Im trying to work on that lol.

But bestie you graduated early?! That's really cool! And that is such a big accomplishment! And I can't blame you for wanting your Friends moment like who wouldn't want that?! I wanted a cute little college romance but instead Im over hear falling for my professor lol OH i forgot to mention I have a cute TA in one of my psyc classes so Im saying sorry in advance for how annoying I will be about him 😔

AH you know I love you Sam! You seriously are someone I look forward to chatting with!-💜

I totally get the bottling your feelings up. I think Tulips is most like that. She has some issues (she, being me). I'm glad feeling relatable was a comfort for you. I know it's a comfort for me and I think one of the NICEST things about writing on here is that there are actually many people share the same feelings as me (us). Way more than I thought. It's kind of isolating day-to-day so it's nice to know it doesn't have to be.

HEY RANDOM!!! do you know your Myer's Brigg Personality? I am a HUGE personality test taker. Those buzzfeed ones that were like "What toaster are you?" literally obsessed. or the soldier, poet, king test? Any of them! I love them. It might be a little confirmation bias-y in my own personality but I don't care; I love them. HAHAHAHHAHA I did one for a job years ago I would have to dig it out to remember what the actual test was but i think it was like your big 5 qualities in the work place. Anyway, it made me think of more ways we could be similar (I'm an INFJ - (T) but if I use my teacher persona I can be convinced to be an ENFJ --but I'm a major introvert at heart obvi)

My mom and I are very similar. My bf has some pretty convincing theories about how my mom used to be like my sister and then turned into me when she had kids because she had to be responsible. So her trauma dumping often includes a lot of regrets and worries. You've mentioned your Mexican-American heritage before and I've seen a lot in the media (I know it's not exactly the same and probs also childish of me to rely on Disney for media but Encanto and Coco I feel like were semi-good examples--please don't think the worst of me if you disagree) Encanto especially--Grandma has some things to talk through. That's a lot to unload on you (or anyone!). Again, nice to know it's relatable even if it's sad sometimes. At least I'm not alone! 💕

UGH I can't wait to write TA Harry 😍 You could NEVER be annoying. I want the play-by-play PLEASE it will be the best inspo and I need to live vicariously!!! I've never been to a drag show but definitely on the list of things I'd like to attend! I fall into the latter part of your sentence there. I refrain from doing a lot of things because I'm already so busy on a regular day I don't want to do anything that will require energy when I don't need to use it HAHAHAHA

You're so sweet, thank you. At the time graduating early felt like a really big deal. Now I feel like it doesn't mean much. I guess it saved me some money right? There isn't much I won't do for a coupon 😂

Love you! Hope your week is being good to you!

xoxo

[bitchkay]

Can we maybe get the headcanons of Grayson and Thoma? I think those are the last two left but I’m not 100% sure 😅

Yup! Those are two of the last ones but there's one(1)☝🏽 more left😼

I already know no one gonna guess it so I may just post it separately, it's Zev Avari. idk it's something about Avaris that aren't Guy that got me woo😍😍

I can't think of anyone else that wouldn't be like completely random or that we me don't know enough about or care enough about

Shit unless you want me to talk bout the Kings and shi--

NSFW headcanons for court of darkness~

Rating: Explicit(18+ mdni)

He a boobie man.

Look at him and tell me right now this man doesn't like tits. 

You can't.

He loves the feel of boobs in his hands

Big, small, or none at all, Grayson has his hands on your chest

Uses them as handlebars when he hits it from the back

Grayson also a pussy addict

I ain't read one event where he doesn't go down on you and honestly purrr

Uses boobs as handlebars when he eats it from the back

Grayson absolutely worships your body

He treats you like a god, an absolute celestial being

You absolutely come first with him (👀)

He has to take care of you before he even thinks of getting himself off

Your sex faces make him so CRAZY

A slut for eye contact.

No matter what yall doing he can't help but look up at your face

Grayson looking up at you with your clit sucked between his lips while you hold his hair back

Grayson loves fondling your boobs while he kisses you

Cus first of all, kissing you⁉️⁉️ two handfulls of breast⁉️⁉️

He's in heaven

He loves when he's fucking you and you loosing your mind

I'm talking back arching, voice cracking, scratching the pillows, ‼trying to fuck him back‼

the most erotic sight he's ever witnessed.

The sight of you responding so well to him will immediately make him cum

Your sex faces are so cute🥺

Yes pillow under your lower back however he's holding you up all on his own pulling you into his thrusts

Listen Grayson shares a wall with Fenn

Imagine if- imma stop.

Grayson has an 8 inch dick.

2 inches wide.

Watching him slowly stretch you out on his cock will never not make his breath hitch.

Grayson is such a sweetheart🥺

When he hears Roy enter the room next door he covers your mouth to muffle your moans for you🥺🥺 so sweet❤

Won't openly admit how much he likes doggy style but with the way he be manhandling you onto your stomach yea… yea

Uses boobs as handlebars when he hits it from the back

No matter what position this man will have his hands on your boobs

Boobs are boobs.😐

Don't you dare get insecure with your boobs around him or your just asking for him to breastfeed suck them

Hickeys all over your chest and thighs

His tongue stay lapping all over your body

Loves cumming inside you

Lowkey has a breeding kink but knows how to hold back

Still cums inside tho

Remember. The Bertholdt birth control😌

Wants to see you beautifully swollen with his child and your breasts deliciously filled with milk

Grayson would drink your titty milk.

Won't vocalize this tho

Not until your ready to settle down

When you are ready to settle down and have a couple booger babies kids he loses control

Starts babbling how he's been waiting so long to breed you, he can't wait to make you a mommy, how you'll make him a daddy, how gorgeous you'd look swollen with his kids

He's promising you the world and then some while he's fucking his cum into you

He's worse than drunk in this moment

Y'all read his Chance at Eternity… yea. Yea. That's exactly where this came from.

Kinda like Roy with exhibitionist tendencies but will never even try to fuck you in public

Yall fucked against his room door with the idea of Roy on the other side, he wasn't but not knowing when Roy was coming back added a certain risk factor that got him hard asf

I am in love with him👁👁

Smiling the whole time❤

Has this absolutely slap happy expression on his face cus it feels so good to be this close to you

Is kissing your cheeks constantly, telling you how much he loves you, how it feels to be inside you, he's just so overwhelmingly happy

Praising you so much

Seeks validation - wants to know he's doing a good job/that you love him too

It's honestly such a cute moment

"..*kiss* I love you *kiss* you feel so good *kiss* you're so pretty *kiss* do you love me too, say you love me too *kiss* creator, you're so good.."

He's basically babbling all he can while kiss your neck and cheeks, loving on you with his whole heart

Sex with Thoma would last so long--

Not even cus of his stamina(however his stamina is crazy)

Just cus he doesn't wanna be separate from you♡

He'd overstimulated himself into delirium just cus he doesn't want this to end

At this point you're both sticky with sweat and cum, Thoma isn't letting up

"... more.. please- you're too-... let me love you longer."

He'd damn near overstimulate himself to tears

He's holding your body flush to his, head buried in your neck, his hair messy, the tie on it long gone, choking on his moans as he succumbs to feeling of you squeezing his cock so good

He loves being inside you

You feel so good around him, so pillowy and wet, he could be inside you forever

Has genuinely fucked himself stupid with you and would do it again

If pussy drunk was a person.

Thoma would absolutely lose himself in you without even realizing it

Thoma loves eating your pussy

Just like Rio this man's a fucking glutton, he can put it away

Thoma would keep going until he's had his fill, fuck how many times you've cum

You're such a delectable treat🥰

Truely a delicacy😩😩

Fingers you while eating you out so he can suck and lick at his cream covered fingers

"Mmm… look at that… hhmmm you taste so good~"

Pretty goddamn vocal 

Doesn't realize he's teasing you but once he does he's a bitch about it 

You're flustered face is so cute to him🥺

Thoma looks like his dick is 7 inches

However...

It's actually 6 inches

Like if you look at him he just kinda looks like its 7 inches

It's not tho

Thoma and Knight have compared dick sizes before and got into a whole fight over who was bigger

He's got maybe 1½ of girth, not too thick

Thoma takes his hair out of the ponytail during sex.

At first it like "woah I've never seen your hair down before" then suddenly you got hearts in your eyes as his hair slightly damp with sweat sways as he plows into you or tickles your cheeks as he goes to kiss you

I can just imagine it- it's just-

That's actually really hot-😳

We love long haired bois😁👍🏽

He loves when you tug on his hair a little

not full on hair pulling but like your hands in his hair as he goes down on you tugging on his light colored stands, or his head buried in your neck and your holding him close or his sucking on your tongue, scratching his scalp

He holds your hips firmly as he thrusts into you watching your tits bouncing reactions

So amazed with your sex faces, feels his chest fill with pride at how good he's making you feel

You touch his cheeks and kiss his nose, telling how well he's doing and how good it feels to fully be his♡

A boyish, charming smirk tugs at Thoma's lips as he gazes down at you. “Yeah? ‘M all yers.”

He's so in love you♡

He really wants to be this connected to you forever

He loves making love to you

He just loves kissing you all over while loving your body to the core

He continues making love to you for hours, completely in love with you and the way his name sounds falling past your kiss-swollen lips. 

Even when yall finished he doesn't wanna let go of you

He's super clingy post sex

He'll just tug you on top of him and wrap you up in his arms, pulling the blanket over the both of you

Yall spend the rest of the night talking

"I want to hold you close, tonight and always. I want to wake up next to you."

Yall have some real deep conversations post sex

He likes having his hair played with so if you scratch his scalp you'll ultimately end up lulling him to sleep♡

giving Thoma head rn brb.

I literally said I was gonna write Zev under Aquias post and it still wasn't yall first guess🤨🤨 /hj /nm

Y'all thought I was joking⁉️🤨

[iguessweallcrazyithinktho]

𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒘𝒆 𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒆𝒆𝒏

Harry was your high school bully, but he started to fall in love with you the last year of high school. Because he became famous he drew distance and hasn't seen you in years; that didn't stop him from thinking about you sometimes. One day he meets you at a friends wedding and he wasn't going to let you slip through his fingers again

Genre: fluff mostly

Warning: none really, Niall is In here

Pairing: harry styles x reader

Please don't post any of my content anywhere else without my permission

Comment and reblogs welcome

It's been 9 years since Harry has seen you. Here you were standing in front of him a beautiful woman, no longer the teen he used to bully. You looked just liked you did when you were 18, but ten times better because you were able to find your confidence. Harry hated himself for ever taken part of the bullying he did to you in high school.

Back when harry was 20

Harry sat with Niall in his hotel room as they both became drunk together. They were talking about random things like they always do when they down a few beers.

"there were lots of pretty girls today. Crazy at times but pretty amazing." Niall said as he laid slump in his chair. Harry nodded as he ran his fingers through his curls.

"yeah, they were beautiful." Harry stopped speaking for a second before he spoke again. "But none of them compared to this girl that was in my class when I was 17." Harry sighed as he took a sip of his beer.

"I bullied her and I regret it now." Niall sat up in his chair. "Harry you talk about her every time you drink a couple of beers mate."

Harry nodded screwing his eyes shut. "I know, I know it's just... I notice she was stunning and now that I think about it I was only bullying her because others were and because I was too afraid to admit I liked her." Harry groaned, he ran his right hand over his face as his left hand gripped his beer tightly. "I'm so stupid."

"harry, you're not stupid, you were young. If you really love her you need to call her or find her and tell her. Apologize first because you did her wrong and you know it. Now–"

Niall slumped back into his chair. "Let's talk about those girls."

--

The next day harry thought long and hard if he should call you and tell you how he felt. He stupid mind was getting in the way and everytime he thought about calling you he pushed the thought aside and said he'll do it later. That was his thoughts on and off for the last 7. He of course didn't call you or find anyway to contact you. Harry gave up hope and tried his best to push you out of his mind.

It was a success before until he saw you again.

Present day

Today harry was going to a close friends wedding. Harry stood in front of the mirror fixing his shirt, making sure he looked good For this event.

When he looked good enough for his liking, he walked out of his bathroom and went downstairs to the kitchen. He grabbed a snack, he knows it was going to be a long day so he needed something.

A few minutes later Harry was on the road to the wedding. He was in a good mood, drumming his fingers to the radio and singing along to it.

Not even 20 minutes later he pulled into the parking lot of the wedding venue. He found a great parking spot in near the back, he Parked and turned off the car. Harry took one last look at himself in the rearview mirror.

"look amazing still."

Harry opened his door without looking. A Yelp was heard forcing harry to look up. He quickly got out of the car as he noticed he had hit you with the door as you were picking something off the ground. "oh my gosh, I'm sor–"

Harry trailed off as he noticed it was you. His heart in his chest skipped a beat, it was really fucking you, he never thought he'd see you again.

"y/n?" You stood up, your eyes were widen when you noticed it was harry, your high school bully.

"harry." You swallowed thickly. "Um.. I have to go inside." You turned around ready to walk away. Harry knew he couldn't let you go again, at least not unless he apologized for what he has done to you.

"y/n wait." Harry ran up to you grabbing your arm. You turned around looking at him "I need to tell you something." Harry sighed. "I know this is so late and it probably doesn't matter to you, but listen... I'm sorry for bullying you in high school. I was trying to fit in and it was a stupid Idea." Harry looked at you upset face, your arms were crossed which showed you weren't convinced, but he keep going.

"I was trying to hide the fact that I was.. I was in love with you. Y/n I Loved you since we were 18 and didn't notice until I was going on to be a superstar. You don't have to forgive me but I needed to say that."

Harry finished. He breathed a sigh of relief as he finally got what he needed off his chest.

You clicked your tongue as the wheels in your brain turned. "Harry it took you this long to say something." "I know I wanted to so many times but I pushed it aside because I was scared." Harry placed his hand on your shoulder softly looking into your eyes as you looked into his.

"I know it took so fucking long, but just know I mean it. I'm so sorry."

You exhaled scratching your forehead. "Look harry You're lucky I forgive people easily." Harry sighed out softly.

"but don't get comfortable now." You pointed at him as you said that. "You have a lot to make up especially if you want this to go far you know, so don't get comfortable."

Harry nodded. "of course." "Ok..." You started. "Do you want to walk into the wedding together?"

Harry grinned. "Sure." He opened his arms so you can link them together. You snickered as you did. You both walked in together like you both were each other's dates. You both had a lot to talk about, but you were happy to put the past behind you.

----

@harryspirate @kendra233

[rowanaelinn]

So this is very random and I apologize if this makes no sense 😂 but I’ve been obsessed with the Lana Del Rey album Ultraviolence, and I can’t help but make comparisons between it and your fic Fire on Fire (which I’m absolutely obsessed with). Most of this is from before the real events of the story, talking about her history and flashbacks with Arobynn.

So starting with the first song, Cruel World, I feel like it encapsulates how Aelin views and interacts with her world around her. She feels young and wild but also like the world is spinning too fast, and it’s going to leave her behind, so she’s racing and acting crazy to catch up, which leads to her partying and her addiction fed by Arobynn. Almost like he is Who she’s trying to keep up with.

The next song, Ultraviolence, gives me very much the vibes of Arobynn and Aelin’s “relationship”. That song hints at an abusive relationship, with lines like “loving you was really hard,” and “he hit me and it felt like a kiss”. The narrator knows this guy is bad for her yet she can’t stop herself from coming back, almost like Aelin and Arobynn. She’s not even necessarily consciously aware at first what’s going on, but she already knows she can’t get away.

Shades of Cool is how I imagine Aelin sort of feels about him before she wises up to everything going on. She isn’t sure she’s interested in him romantically (🤢) but she’s still stuck in that pull that Arobynn has on her. I don’t know if this makes any sense 😂 but I get the vibes with the lines like “But you are unfixable, I can't break through your world” and “And when he calls, he calls for me and not for you”.

Okay, Brooklyn Baby is both more complicated and less complicated at the same time. I think it’s really just how Aelin kinda views herself for a while there while she’s still a teenager. She thinks she’s some mature, confident, self assured grown woman already, who can handle everything in the world, even if she’s really not. Key lines: “Yeah, my boyfriend's pretty cool, But he's not as cool as me” and “They say I'm too young to love you, They say I'm too dumb to see”.

West Coast I guess for me just highlights a lot of the lifestyle that she’s living, that carefree destructive lifestyle. She has Sam and she has her friends, but she also has her neglectful parents, and she’s tossed herself into this spiral, pretending it’s a good way to live. “"If you're not drinkin' then you're not playin'.”

The last one that really makes me think of Fire on Fire is Pretty When You Cry. There’s different angles of this song that I think relate to it. First off, I think part of it hits at how Arobynn was so adept at making Aelin feel special, and kind of isolating her into making her think he was the only one who cared about her. Like in the line “All those little times you said that I'm your girl, You make me feel like your whole world”. But then it also transitions into a different facet of their relationship with the words “They don't mean shit compared to all your drugs”. This is when Aelin turns to him out of desperation, after she gets kicked out and she has to turn to him for drugs and money. And then finally, the line “I'll wait for you, babe, you don't come through, babe, You never do, babe, that's just what you do, Because I'm pretty when I cry”. This really highlights Arobynn’s overall cruelty towards her. He makes her trust him, makes her rely on him, but never treats her well. When she’s vulnerable, he takes advantage of her, and leaves her more destroyed than she was before.

If you can’t tell, I love this fic haha 😂 I’m sorry for throwing my rambling thoughts on you but I just couldn’t help but notice the similarities and I wanted to share 😊

I saw this ask when I woke up this morning and it legit made me cry 😭

I wanted to answer right away but instead it made me re listen to the entire album and I need to say: You’re right on every point

I knew that my Aelin made me think a lot of Lana’s early albums (and if you never listened to Marina’s Electra Heart you should because it’s a lot like Aelin too) but I never made all those connection and now I’ll never be able to listen to the album without thinking of Fire on Fire Aelin😭

I feel like Brooklyn Baby could be so much like the past as you said, but also what I want Aelin to become in the future. She has this thing with Rowan but at the same time she needs to be herself without a man defying her! And for the line: "They say I’m too young to love you, they say I’m too dumb to see" it could be Arobynn telling her she cannot be in love with Rowan etc…

There is also this line, "you say I’m like ice, I freeze" that makes me thing of this little part of story I deleted before posting because it felt weird but I still love it:

in a strange way, it had always been rowan. even before she met him, it had been rowan. she realized that she hated him because he was like her, the same darkness in his eyes.

rowan had been the only person who saw all horrible parts of her her and still stuck around, even if it was as her enemy only.

it felt like she had been made to find rowan and to be with him, so they could burn the world together. because she had mistook him for everything he wasn’t, him the ice and her the fire, she thought it was because they were opposite. but she forgot that ice burned too.

Thank you so much for this Morgan, I screenshot ed that ask and will always keep it to reread whenever I need to🥹

Also, you made me wanna go back to this story 😂

[ladyredzx]

(This one is from my old works)

𝙈𝙖𝙠𝙞 𝙭 𝙁𝙚𝙢!𝙍𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧

Little Miss Perfect

3rd person POV

Straight hair, Straight A's, Straightforward, Straight Path

Y/n was training with Megumi and Nobara while waiting for the Second years

This is their First time meeting since they need to work together for the Kyoto Goodwill Event

Megumi Fushiguro a tall, dark haired boy with datk blue eyes

Cursed Technique: Shikigami

Nobara Kugisaki a condfident and brash young woman with orange hair and brownish eyes

Cursed technique: Hairpin (idk if this is right but this is what I saw on google okay-)

Y/n L/n, a perfect girl with Straight hair, Straight A's, Straightforward, Straight Path and E/c

Cursed Technique: Cursed Ink

'I don't cut corners

I make a point to be on time

Head of the Student Council'

Y/n's POV

Magumi, Nobara and I have finished our sparring with each other and went to take a break

I went to the vending machine to get some snacks for us and on the way I hear people whispering things to each other, stuff like:

I don't black out at parties

I jam to Paul McCartney

If you ask me how I'm doing

I'll say...

Well, hmm

And adults from my clan telling my story to others:

I was adopted when I was two

My parents spoiled me rotten

It's annoying honestly sometimes

Often I ask myself, "What did I do?"

To get as far as I've gotten

I've made my way to the vending machine and got all of our snacks

After that I start to make my way back to the training grounds until I bump into someone making me drop my things

"I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking on where I was going" I bowed before crouching down to pick up the dropped stuff

"It's all right, but watch where you're going next time we don't want you bumping to kidnapper now do we?" A strong voice made it to my ears looking up to see a girl with green hair and goldish eyes wearing glasses

A pretty girl walks by my locker

My heart gives a flutter

But I don't dare utter a word

'Cause that would be absurd behaviour

For little miss perfect

She helped me stand up and I bowed saying "Thank you!"

And ran off to the training grounds

My heart was beating crazy, I feel my face burning hot

'What's going on with me?'

I made it to the training grounds and saw megumi and nobara waiting for me

"Hey Y/n" Nobara waved when I got closer to them

"Are you sick or something? your face is red" Megumi asked with concern

"I-I'm fine it's just hot out hehe Imma wash my face to cool down" I said waving to go to the bathroom

When I hot there I saw myself in the mirror, 'Can it be?' I asked myself 'No it can't-'

'Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na

No, I can't risk falling off my throne

La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

Love is something I don't even know

Straight hair, straight A's, straightforward

Straight girl

Little miss perfect

That's me'

'I have to make them proud..'

I walked out the bathroom and went back to Megumi and Nobara then we went back to training

A few minutes later we heard someone shouting at the too of the stairs

"Megumi Fushiguro more concentration, Nobara Kugisaki more aura, Y/n L/n watch your posture" We all turned around to see 2 People and a Panda?

"Maki Zenin one of the Second years nice to meet you" She introduced herself with an attractive smirk- wait no-

"This is Toge Inumaki he can't speak due to his curse which is activated when he say words so you might hear him say ingredients of onigiri often" I waved to him and he waved back

"And I'm panda I'm an Abrupt Mutated Cursed Corpse created by the Principal before you get any other thoughts" Panda said, he looks so soft I want to hug him-

But with Maki-senpai here this is gonna hard 'Oh boy...'

Timeskip after the Event

'One night my friend stayed over, We laughed, and drank and ordered, Something about her drew me in, What? It's totally platonic'

The girls and boys had a seperate sleepover after the celebration of the win of Tokyo Jujutsu High

We were in my room, Nobara was knocked out an hour ago which leaves me and Maki just chatting random things but I can't help but stare at her at times

That night was so exciting

Her smirks were so enticing

Hours speed by like seconds

Then, what happens is iconic

She takes a sip, I bite my lip

She tells a joke, I nearly choke

She braids my hair, I sit there

Blacking out for the first time

Next thing I know, I lose control

I finally kiss her but oh no

I see a face in my window

Then my brain starts to go

I didn't know why I did that but then my brain made up some scenarios about my clan looking at me with disgust

I pull away from her wide eyed she was as well "I-I'm sorry I didn't kniw what I was doing!" I said rushing out of the dorms

'You're so dumb Y/n!! Why would she even like you! Ugh' I started scolding myself not noticing tears falling down like a waterfall

Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na

No, you can't risk falling off your throne

La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

Love is something you don't even know

Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na

You can't risk falling off your throne

La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

Love

You don't even know

I can't face her... again...

Rewind, induce amnesia

Deny the truth, that's easier

You're just confused, believe her, When she says there's nothing there, It's never worth it, When you're little miss perfect...

Suddenly I sas hugged from behind "I like you, ok now don't fo running away" Maki said snuggling her head on the crook of my head

I started sobbing harder, she turned me around and made me look at her "Stop crying it doesn't suit you" she said wiping my tears away

"Maki, I like- no Love you but what about my clan yours as well..."

"Then let them be we don't have to follow them we have our own wants and needs to so let me ask you this"

"Y/n L/n will you be my girlfriend and be with me until the end promise me don't follow what they expect you do and be what you want?"

"Yes, Maki I will" I said while smiling up to her

She cupped my cheeks and we kissed slowly under the moonlight

Bonus:

I heard sone camera flashing I opened my eyes to be faced with maki also slowly waking up

When she saw me she smiled and kissed my forehead "Goodmorning beautiful" she greeted making me blush and bury my head in her chest then we heard some snickering we looked around to find Nobara and Itadori holding their phones trying to hold their laughs and Megumi, Inumaki, and Panda by the door smirking making me more embarrassed and hide under the blankets

Maki had a irk mark oh her temple "Get out." She said before throwing some pillows at them

[chezborger]

The lovely Assistant (Alucard x Chubby Reader) Chapter One

A/n: This took a while and it got a little more attention than I expected so I'm also a little nervous to share it but still I hope you like it! 😅😳💕

Type: Smut undertones, Mentions of death

~~~~~~~~~~~

She yearned for him, possibly ached for him. She was a virgin though her dreams seemed like she wasn't. the daydreams played around in her head like a movie, Alucard gripping her thick soft thighs while he was making her moan into the open air. She knew she shouldn't but, thinking about him too much would cause her thoughts to be flooded and also her panties.

Although she didn't know how to tell him let alone talk to him. Being an assistant for Hellsing was hard enough as it was, then having a tall handsome vampire lurking from the shadows, looking over her shoulder would make her chubby cheeks burn in nervousness and embarrassment. How could she keep this up? even if she tried avoiding him in the big estate he would still show up somehow.

Late in the evening just as the sun sets he decided to say something, it was small and meaningless but still something. "Good evening assistant." He said from the shadows making the girl jump and grip her papers, which made him chuckle. "H-Hello Alucard...what brings you here?"

"I was bored, decided to go for a walk but wanted to check in on my favorite assistant."

"But I'm just the one?"

"Exactly." He says amusingly as he circles around the girl, messing with things on her desk making her fidget. After that day he started going around her more often. The two becoming more acquainted some could say friends. When he'd come back from an assignment and she'd still be working in the early hours it would make him smile to himself before he starts his playful banter. She would call him annoying or scoff and laugh when he said or did something to mess with her but deep down she enjoyed it so and would give her butterfly's.

One night after another random wet dream about him she noticed someone sitting down in a chair. Making out a hat like figure it was more like a shadow until it cleared and she could make out the red attire. She woke up quick almost instantly. Cheeks burning, underwear soaked, she calmed herself but the memory still stayed. Could it have been just another vivid dream?

Going about her day was difficult. Having to work thinking last night, trying to get work done she cleared her head the best she could and continued to do her job.

"I'm rather hurt." A voice said in her mind.

"What for?" She replied out loud, she would've been freaked out but making out the voice was easy and already knew who it was. He comes out of nowhere but that's the usual for him. Then takes a seat in one of the chairs in front of her desk.

"You've got other priorities on mind, you arent thinking about me like you normally do." Her jaw drops and chokes on her spit making her cough crazy.

"What are you t-talking about?!" She laughs nervously waving her hand off. "That's crazy! I need to g-get back to work."

"Believe me, I know crazy. You're lying and I can tell."

"How can you tell?" She leans in a little

"You just told me." he chuckles with a grin making the womans ears redden.

"Also I may have seen what you're thinking from time to time. Don't get mad though, I do it to almost anyone I walk past but your thoughts are different, really different." He laughs again, she thinks if anyone would care if the floor swallowed her at this very moment.

"You look so innocent and cute yet you have lewd day dreams, and about me too."

"I- I'm sorry I won't-" She doesn't know how to react. Embarrassed, Angry, maybe even flustered, here he was saying all of this nonchalantly.

"I'm not saying that I hated it. Actually what I wanted really to tell you is you're unknowingly dreaming visions they're really premonitions. You have a gift to look into the future." Her head spins and he smiles admiring her flustered state.

"Wait?! Then are you saying that me and you..."

He nods and she searches his eyes, they almost seemed hungry for something but not blood.

"Exactly assistant, but it's hardly a surprise for me. I've been admiring you from the shadows,,admiring your curves when you're not noticing."

"Alucard!" She says putting her hands over her chest.

"So what do think, assistant?" He smirks.

"What do you mean?" her hearts races

"Do you want me to make your dreams come true?"

She bites her soft lip as her brain wraps around the hole situation and her legs press together trying to stop the need inbetween them. Only nodding she gets up and sits on his lap, her legs moving on their own at this point. His chuckle rumbles through his chest and she looks away blushing. Fingers grab her chin to make her face him and he leans down to kiss her.

"Mhmm...." she tries to match his kissing, the kiss started experimental, with firm but soft kisses then ended heated with tongues exploring eachother feverishly. When they pull away she realizes the hand on her ass and the one and her thigh, both getting a feel of her and griping softly. Her hand slides down to his and lifts up the big hand to her heavy breast and he gropes it willingly.

"Tell me, are you a virgin?"

"Yes." she breathes out

He picks her up effortlessly and sits her down on the desk. "If we continue then your chances of becoming a ghoul are very high then, I would never let that happen but It's still a risk."

"Then...then bite me, make me yours in all ways, Alucard." She grazes her neck softly, her hand slides down and unbuttons the strained buttons revealing her chest and laced bra.

His eyes widen "You'd be willing to become a vampire just to be with me?, do you know what that would mean for you. Once you choose to walk the night you can never go back again. "

"Yes, I know this is what I want, I-I could possibly do more for Hellsing too." He comes down to catch her lips roughly but not enough to hurt her only for her whimper. Making his way down to her neck then to her breast, but before he can bite down on the plump skin there's a intercom call from the phone.

"Mrs.(L/n) the round table conference is about to start and I need you to deliver the chip that we've recovered.

It's Integra herself calling, ignoring her would be a death sentence and an ear full. Before she even turned around back to Alucard he was gone. That was until she heard a voice echo into her head.

"Go. We'll catch up later, you wouldn't want to keep her waiting."

She nods to herself as she scrambles to get it and head over after wards she heads back to her office and finishes up a stack of papers Integra wanted done. Eveything going according to schedule until she hears a commotion coming from outside the door and a few rumbles hear and there. She's turns the knob to be met with Hellsing soliders rushing toward the direction of the noise.

What could it be? She thinks to herself as she follows behind quickly. The noise grows louder, gunshots fire and yelling is apparent, when the sight infront of her comes to view horror fills her body from head to toe.

"Oh...my God!" Panic fills her has they fight ghouls, forcing their way in, leaving a wake of death and destruction.

She runs back but she hears ghouls approaching from there. She dives into another room and slams it shut. Her mind races with all sorts of questions and how this could be happening. Seconds later a stray bullet breaks through getting into her side and she winces in pain clutching her side. Hearing them getting closer knowing soon enough they would charge in, She looks around then up to the vents. Making a stack she reaches it in a nick of time before the sound of cracking wood fills the room and ghouls rush in.

"W-What the hell do I do now?!" She looks throw the slotted holes and continues in the dark metal maze of tunnels. As she goes through gunfire and manic laughter fills the vents.

"I have no idea where I'm even going!" As shes hears voices aside from the killing she makes her way there but falls through before she can make it. Not seeing the rusted bolts in the dark finally giving out and she falls through. The wind gets knocked out of her.

"Who the hell is this bitch?!" His laugh burning into her head. "I can have some real fun with this one. I'll have you screaming in more ways than one!" Dread seeps through her but before she can respond Walter comes into view.

"Are you alright Ms. (Y/n), it looks like you've been injured you need to be checked immediately."

"W-Walter I-" before she knew it she felt deathly cold and hot at the same time. The events that unfold before her start to blacken and she passes out.

~~~~~~~~~~

Part Two 😊

[loxbbg]

Etherial

Chapter 2

Masterlist

Ethereal: extremely delicate and light in a way that seems too perfect for this world.

Its been 3 month since Y/N left with Voldemort. The last time I saw her was when I got my dark mark 2 weeks after she left. She looked tired from the dark circles under her eyes and the bruises from her training and overusing her magic.  When her and Voldemort appeared she was surrounded by all the adults asking her to show them what she had learned so far. After about 5 new spells she learned including the killing curse on a random bird outside she had an obvious look of annoyance on her face she flashed out of the room surprising everyone at the sudden flash. I wasn't surprised she did it. She never was much of a people person unless it was at Hogwarts where she had to be. She didn't use her becen in the 3 months I didn't blame her she was busy.  During the time I went through my own training with Bellatrix I felt worn out with every spell thrown at me. I was expected to do what my father couldn't. I held the Malfoy name and legacy on my back. How was I supposed to do this?

My mothers hands rested on my shoulder as I was hunched over in the chair. Opening my eyes my mother sat below me looking up at me removing my hands from my face.

“Draco my Draco, my beautiful boy I see the turmoil going on in your beautiful eyes.” She looked up at me with worried eyes

“Mother I don't think I can do this. I know I have to but what if I can. I'll be on my own. What if I get caught? I cannot go to Azkaban, he will kill me. This wasn't supposed to happen till after Y/N and I… we were supposed to marry.”

“And It can still happen to Draco. Y/N just has a bigger play in life sooner than we expected but so do you. How do you think Y/n would react to seeing you this way.” She would probably tell me that I'm better than this that I was “The Draco Malfoy” and could do anything with or without her. She was dreadfully silly around me different than what anyone whether it be a death eater or schoolmate she was just my Y/N not “Y/n Wayne” or “The Cursed Godchild” just Y/n.

“Draco If you need me I will be here and even if she isn't here you know Y/N would be here helping you. Trust me you'll see her soon just focus on what has to be done now.” Draco inhaled.

It's been three months. Three months since I last spoke to her. Our 6th year of Hogwarts is supposed to start. My bags were already on the train. My mother and Estrella stood on the platform waiting for me to say goodbye. It was a tradition for them to send us off but today, this year of all years we needed them to be here. I needed her to be here.

“Watch where you're going.” Someone bumped into me almost knocking me off my balance.

“Sorry love I’ve just been so dazed my summer has been crazy.”  That voice sounds so familiar. Looking down at the short black haired girl I haven't seen the entire vacation in her Slytherin robes but, how? She couldn't be done with training.

“Bloody Hell” I pull her body into mine holding her close in the hug.

“Hello darling I’ve missed you. Summer has been one hell of a ride.” She looks up at me smirking.

“Beautiful  you have no idea.” I pressed my lips onto her forehead pulling her further into me. Months felt like years after not seeing her. She moved from under my lips looking up at me, she wraps her arms around my neck pulling me closer to her.

“I've been wanting to do this for a while now.” Our lips meet melting into each other. If the train had not blown its horn we might have missed it.

“They knew by the way.” She whispered after pulling away looking at our parents.

“I finished my training and my mother had already packed my bags so I came early and saved us a seat but we should really go before they leave without us. The faster we get to Hogwarts the faster we can be alone.” She whispers the last line for only me to hear. We wave to our parents running into the train at the final bell of the train. No one knew what we really went through this summer but they will know after what’s coming this year.

(blah blah blah pov switch)

Walking into the cart we walked into the booth with our stuff Pansy and Blaise sitting opposite of where we would sit. Slipping into the booth I link my hands with Draco, I have so much to tell him, to show him. Godfather has shown me things, things near muggles couldn't  fathom.

“ How was your summer?” Parkinson asked, looking down and Dracos and I linked hands. She's always had a crush on Draco. I knew she felt threatened by me always asking me if Draco and I were together? Why did we spend so much time together? What part of us being childhood friends did she not understand? This was meant to happen, sad she had so much hope. Kinda pathetic really.

“Well it wasn't really that eventful. We took some trips together with both our families. It was a shame our fathers couldn't be there but besides for that nothing much happened.” I kept eye contact with Pansy smiling as I brushed my thumb on Draco’s. He breaks away from his conversation with Blaise looking in my direction he leans close to my ear

“You know you're making it obvious.” I smirked against his ear, glancing over at Pansy who looked annoyed and uncomfortable.

“ I know, that's the point” Pulling away I put a small peck on his lips before leaning my head onto his shoulder.

“Oh yeah and that too.”I shrug. Pansy thinks everything outside the window looks more interesting than looking at us, Blaise just looked at smirking at Draco continuing their conversation, Draco wraps his arm around my waist. I unintentionally fell asleep on his shoulder.

“What just happened? Blaise? “ My eyes quickly fluttered open hearing Draco who was looking around the cart

“Don't know,” Blaise responded. Just then, a small bag teeters, then tumbles from a luggage rack. It was Draco's wheels.

“Relax guys. The lights went out is all. Come on Draco we’ll be at Hogwarts before you know it.” She bats her non-existent eye lashes at her. Her flirting couldn't be anymore obvious its getting desperate at this point.

Draco eyes the bag, slinging it back onto the luggage rack and plops down. I run my hands through his hair looking up at the bag, It's never happened before.

“Hogwarts. What a pathetic excuse for a school. I think I’d pitch myself off the Astronomy Tower if I thought I had to continue on for another two years.” I continue twisting my fingers through his hair. It truly was pathetic it could've been a great school centuries ago.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Pansy asked.

“Let’s just say I don’t think you’ll be seeing Y/N and I, wasting our time in Charms Class next year.” Pansy Glances over at Blaise who just snorts. Looking over at me I just shrug agreeing with what Draco said.

“Are you amused Blaise? We’ll see just who’s laughing in the end.”  I chuckled to myself, if things were different maybe he would tell Blaise, I could care less about Pansy and her wondering little hands. I saw how she reached out for Darco when she thought I was asleep.

Blaise shakes his head, smiling as he looks out the window at the darkness of the tunnel. Just then the small bag in the upper rack shifts. Dracos and I look up to it. Draco reached for his wand still looking up to the bag, I have a clue to what or who might be in the rack and I think Draco does as well. I reached for his hand shaking my head ‘no’ now wasn't the time with all these people around.

“Later.” I whispered, not moving my head from his shoulder. If Potter wasn't so obvious he might have heard. The rest of the ride was met in silence as Draco refused to say anything unless it was small talk.

As the Hogwarts express pulled into the station Draco and I stayed behind. Draco pulled down our bags gripping onto the handle.

“Go guys, we'll meet up in a bit. I think I left something in the bathroom.” I shooed Pansy and Blaise away. They know Draco and I are like glue so they didn't expect him to leave me alone. Walking out the train cart Draco lets the blinds down with a spell closing the door in the process.

“Didn’t mummy ever tell you it’s bad manners to eavesdrop, Potter? Petrificus Totalus!” Draco points his wand to the luggage rack. Harry hits the floor with a thump. I moved Harry's Invisibility cloak revealing him paralized to the floor.

“She can't remember she's been dead before he could wipe the drool off his face.” I smirk looking bored at Harry’s shocked expression at my response. Unusually I would just watch ‘helplessly’ as Draco made fun of him but never participated.

Draco brought his foot down onto Harry’s face snapping his nose blood pooling from it. I move the invisibility cloak onto Harry faking a pout.

“Enjoy the ride back to London.” Draco spat.

“Goodbye Harry” I fully covered his face, Draco already at the door with the rest of our bags to the carriages. Walking up you our carriage of course there needed to be an issue

“It's not a cane, you cretin.It’s a walking stick.” Flinched passed a metal detector over the stick in question. If I could I would flash us into hogwart by now but ‘no’ that's gonna raise suspicion.

“And what exactly would you be wanting with a walking stick?” Aren't these muggle lovers supposed to be sensitive?

“It's his Fathers you insensitive bastard.” I sneered leaning on the carriage.

“Was his fathers.” Snape separated himself from the shadows. Draco, eyeing him warily, snatching the stick from Filch.

“Is my father’s. He’s not dead.” He was sent to Alatraz and all of a sudden they don't even mention him in the present no wonder Draco hates it here.  Draco carefully wraps the stick in felt, laying it back inside his trunk.

“It’s alright, Mr. Filch. I can vouch for Mr. Malfoy and Mrs. Wayne.” Snape says putting the last of the things into the carriage. Instead of coming in with me Snape and Draco walked besides it while it moved. Turning around Draco caught Harry looking at him. I followed his gaze at Potter with a crooked nose.

“Nice face, Potter.” Draco called out as Potter was no longer in sight.

“My mother told me what you're doing for Draco. She also told me what you know. Are you sure you're willing to leave all of this. Betray the people you call your friends for the dark lord.” I turned my attention to snape. Is it really wise to have someone willing to betray the people he was around for so long.

“These people were never my friends, merely a cover until you godfather came back to make his claim.” I didn't want to question him too much in fear of others hearing but for now it satisfied my curiosity. Good to know someone on the inside was watching.  Glancing ast Draco who looked deep in thought I snapped my fingers at him.

“What are you thinking about, ferret?” I chuckled at the name given to him after he was changed to one a year ago. He wasn't too fond of it but I couldn't care.

“You know I hate when you call me that.” he snapped.

“Just answer.” I chuckled.

“Just thinking about father. Do you think that he will get out.” I hadn't even thought about it, both of our fathers were locked up. I hadn't had the time to really think about it. It was the first summer my father, both our fathers were not  home when we returned from Hogwarts. We hadn't been able to go on our family trip. Everything changed this summer.

“Draco, you don't trust godfather, trust me. I will do everything I can to get them out I swear.” He smiled up at me. I stepped out of the carriage wanting to walk with him. He pulled me close to him kissing the ring he gave to me during the triwizard games. Hogwarts was in our sights looking up. I let out a breath. Being here again made me realize this yeari will finally be doing something important and worthy rather than having these people suck up to me for my name.

“Are you ready.” Draco asked. Looking back Snape let out a breath looking like he's over this already.

“Born ready.”

[woagitsasecret]

Snap back from a panic attack Am I hallucinating? Going crazy? Gotta relax I gotta make sense of the current events I put the headset on, there's something wrong I can't remember anything Who are you? Who am I? What the hell's my ****ing name? Is it true? Did I die? Can somebody please explain? I'm not supposed to be here Can someone just show me the door?

(We've got a new forever friend) What's this place? Who's talking to mе? Did you say forever? (Who wants to tell him he's condemned?) I must be dreaming, tell me

It's started sinking in, we're never leaving Entertainers in the show that never ends Try not to panic when you can't understand That you're a player on the stage And now the curtain won't go down Try not to think about how long you've been here It might get easier with every year you spend Trapped in the circus You know, it might just work if you can try not to go insane

Break out, now I'm trying to hide From something like I've never seen, I think I'm losing my mind I gotta get help, or do I think of myself? I swear I saw a doorway out of here, wait Corridor after door after door, it never ends How can there still be more? Having trouble comprehending just what kind of hell I'm in I'm losing hope, how can I open one more door?

(Well, well!) Look at you in the void all alone Thought you found another exit door (No spoilers!) Back to the show, nowhere to go Try to follow better order to the letter (Have an adventure!) What you saw was another work in progress In the office for this offense Could be trouble, but I'm feeling gracious Now in any case, we gotta get you into place Get a smile on your face (It's showtime!)

Can you retain some control of your brain? That's why I set this whole thing up Why not just try to play along? Can you be patient, it can't be explained It's kinda complicated, can you wait a minute or a couple of years?

I can't remember who I am (That's completely normal) (What's a name? A bunch of random letters!) They tell me I'm forever damned! (Let's have some fun, it's not that bad) Hey, watch your language!

It's started sinking in, we're never leaving Entertainers in the show that never ends Try not to panic when you can't understand That you're a player on the stage And now the curtain won't go down Try not to think about how long you've been here It might get easier with every year you spend Trapped in the circus You know, it might just work if you can try not to go insane

I don't think I can go on (Stay with us, my dear) Don't want to lose myself (You know you're stuck with us here) I'll try putting a show on (That's the spirit, come on) I'll try biding my time (Wait, no, that's not what I meant at all!) I'll find a way out of here (No, you've gotta stay here forever!) I'll never stop (I mean it, you're stuck!) I'll never give up on life (Stop singing!) I'll get out of this place tonight (My god, it's beautiful!) Or tomorrow, this horrible hell (This is heart-wrenching) Can't hold me forever! (You're still going, huh?) Whenever I get the chance! (Okay)

Ah, hahaha, ah, hahaha, ahaha That's hilarious!

(Whoa, oh-oh, oh) It's started sinking in, we're never leaving Entertainers in the show that never ends Try not to panic when you can't understand That you're a player on the stage And now the curtain won't go down Try not to think about how long you've been here It might get easier with every year you spend Trapped in the circus You know, it might just work if you can try not to go insane