#you can hear you soulmate's heartbeat
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simon riley x fem!reader
Imagine holding Simon when he cries.
Simon Riley is an incredibly strong man, an absolute force to be reckoned with on the battlefield. Since joining the SAS in 2001, he has created a name for himself. A military legend—seemingly more ghost-like than flesh and blood. But that is the farthest from the truth, isn’t it? Cause, at the end of the day, he is still human. You’re his girl, the love of his life. His true love—his only love.
You are a source of comfort he somehow found in this shitty, cold world. The home he never had the privilege of experiencing; your arms have provided him with everything he was denied during boyhood.
So imagine your Simon arriving home one evening—dead silent—merely shuffling his way to where you’re seated comfortably on the living room couch. His duffle bag drops near his leather recliner before the balaclava is tossed to the side. On his face is a certain heaviness, a sadness twisted in his handsome features; his blue eyes are not as bright as they usually are.
You swallow. Did something happen during the mission?
“What is wrong, baby?” You coo, stretching your arms out wide to welcome him in.
Without another thought, Simon tucks himself into your embrace, with his head resting gently on your chest. Against your breast, he can hear your heartbeat thundering away in your chest, moving in a rhythm that matches his. He reckons he is the luckiest bastard in the world, to find a soulmate who compliments him in every aspect of life.
He lets out a small sigh, squeezing his eyes shut, feeling his throat closing up as tears begin to well up. His bottom lip trembles before he bites down on it.
“Simon,” you murmur, pressing a gentle kiss on his forehead. “What happened, my love?”
Another tear, followed by three more. A tiny, shaky exhale. Simon remains utterly still for a moment, not saying anything, until…“It’s my father’s birthday today.” His voice is quiet, breathless, unbelievably thick with sheer sadness.
Your face falls at that. “Oh, Simon.” A sad smile pulls at your lips while you hug him closer, peppering more kisses up and down his hairline, pausing to brush back soft, blonde strands. You say nothing more as he continues to weep in your arms, entire body racking with choked-up sobs and uneven breathing.
“I loved him,” Simon rasps out, pulling his face up from your neck. Both his cheeks and nose are a cherry-red, with baby-blue eyes bloodshot and puffy, lined with fresh tears. For a moment, he wasn’t the Simon Riley you fell in love with, but the Simon Riley who was five-years-old—all scrawny, little legged and freshly bruised, hiding behind the bookcase in his parents’ bedroom.
“Loved him so bloody much.”
You don’t know what to say. What can you even say? Nothing can heal those wounds, cut so deep in his heart and soul that any slight movement reopens them. “I know you did.” You kiss his nose, minding the mess of tears and snot.
His fists slowly tighten, knuckles whitening as all the memories of his father begin to flood through him; they all carry an agonizing sensation, the kind that is too fuckin' painful to discuss aloud, yet too damn gut-wrenching to keep bottled up inside.
“Do ya…” he hiccups, clearing his throat. “Do ya think…in another life…?”
In another life. You think for a moment, carding your fingers softly through his hair. “Maybe, my love…”
Simon nods. “Maybe,” he croaks out, keeping his arms tight around you. There, on the couch, you continue to hold him, letting his torrent of tears soak your shirt; time and time again, your fingers run through his hair in some silent attempt to ease the little boy wailing inside.
“It’s okay, baby.”
You kiss his temple.
“You’re alright. Let it out, baby.”
He’ll be alright tomorrow. You know it. In the morning, he’ll be barefoot and content in the kitchen, baking his mother’s special recipe of blueberry and pineapple pancakes—a cup of milk, one egg, blueberries, pineapple, and, of course, the batter—all while waiting for your arms to circle around his chest.
But for right now, he is five years old, finally being embraced in arms so warm and loving and protective—so unbelievably perfect. The feeling incites more tears.
"Thank you, baby," he mumbles, gently kissing your collarbone; it's a kiss so rich with love, appreciation, and adoration that it stirs up butterflies in your tummy. "For everything."
For everything. Oh, you silly boy. "Simon." You smile down at him, gently caressing his cheek. "For you, my love? I'd do anything."
note: a little drabble for my "let simon riley cry 2024" campaign. thanks!
#vic writes 🧸#call of duty#cod mw#cod ghost#simon riley#simon ghost riley#simon riley imagine#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley x fem!reader#ghost x reader#ghost x fem!reader
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Pairing: Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Fremen!soulmate! reader Summary: You were taught that there were monsters lurking in the darkness. That you should never talk to them—those who are just waiting to get at you in your defenceless state. But how do you avoid something that haunts your dreams every night? And what to do when a nightmare suddenly enters your reality? Warning: violence; blood; Feyd Rautha; death; soulmate au!; Taglist for Feyd: @avidreader73 Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~ Main Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~ Part II ~•♤♤♤•~
At first you thought it was just a nightmare.
One of those terrifyingly stupid ones that happens when you collapse into bed in exhaustion after a long day of training with your father.
You don't remember exactly how you ended up on Arrakis, but you know for sure that it wasn't your home planet. You may have been too young to remember everything from your past or to have one sure memory about living somewhere else than that one huge dune, but it didn't change that at night you are haunted by images that the human imagination couldn't create on its own.
However, you preferred not to mention it to your father. He kept the story of your little family close to him, not telling anyone from your Sietch any details. For him, the past was supposed to stay in the past. So you didn't push him. The life you had... was, for lack of a better word, enough. You didn't go hungry, you didn't lack water as much as other groups, and you lived a peaceful life far from the Atreides and Harkonnens who tried to take over Arrakis or the cunning plans of the Bene Gesserit. You lived in peace.
Until some time.
It all began with a nightmare…
You shiver as you feel the heat rising from the desert sands surrounding you. A warm wind blows into your eyes, mocking you as it hits grains of sand in your eyes. You curse, rubbing your hand over your eyes as you try to cover them so you can take in as much of your surroundings as the crazy sandstorm will allow you.
In the distance, you see something like a cave carved into a rocky dune. You head there in hopes of finding shelter there. You go slowly, step by step. Sand gets inside your shoes; you feel it everywhere. On the skin, in the hair, on the eyelashes, on the lips. You feel like you're about to choke on it.
The pungent scent of the spice fills your lungs, making you feel stronger and more alert as you wade through the folds of sand.
And suddenly, you hear it. Gentle, dull thumps on the ground. You freeze, realising what they could mean—or rather, what they could attract.
You run ahead even before you notice the sand moving due to the sandworm's arrival. You feel the ground shake as you desperately try to escape the bloodthirsty creature of Arrakis. But, as always, you're too slow. The sandworm emerges, engulfing you completely. Darkness envelopes you as you feel yourself falling.
Only this time you don't wake up with a racing heart or jump out of bed with rapid breathing, grabbing for the sword that rests safely by your bed.
No. This time, you land in a large, empty, black room.
You shudder, wrapping your hands around yourself and rubbing your arms as you feel the coldness of the room hit your skin. You frown as you walk over to the mirror, which seems to be the only thing in the room illuminated by the dim glow of the torchlight on the wall. You're wearing a long black nightgown; your nails are painted black, as are your lips. Your skin is a little paler than usual, but you're relieved to no longer have to deal with the sands of Arrakis. You are fed up with this planet every day, seeing it in your dreams only kills you more…
You don't recognise this place, but something about the darkness surrounding you makes you feel uneasy. Your heart quickens as you look for a way out of the empty, black chamber.
Your bare feet lead you into the darkness, all you can hear is your breathing, your heartbeat, and your quiet footsteps as you take quick steps, trying to have as little contact as possible between your skin and the cold, black marble underneath your feet.
You start to hear whispers. Quiet, feminine. You don't understand most of them; they all merge into a tangle of sounds, from which it is difficult to distinguish single words. You walk forward, only to once again stand in front of the same mirror as at the beginning of your journey.
You examine the black frame, looking for some hidden mechanism they might be hiding, convinced that there is some secret passage hidden behind the mirror. You run your fingertips lightly over the frame of the mirror and flinch when you accidentally prick your finger.
You hiss as a trickle of blood runs down your finger. You put it on your lips, but before you can lick the blood off it, you see in the mirror that someone's large, white hand is firmly gripping your wrist, stopping you from doing so.
You freeze when your eyes meet the icy blue irises of a man emerging from the shadows behind you. Your heart beats faster when you see his white, bald head and eyebrowless face. The sneer on his face allows you to see his pitch-black teeth for a moment, which makes you shiver.
Harkonnen.
You feel him pressing his chest against your back. He wraps his other hand around your waist like a snake, making you feel trapped, like you can't breathe anymore.
Somehow, you can't move your gaze from the mirror. And even when you're in Harkonnen's dangerous grasp, all you can do is look at him, or more precisely, into his eyes. You are hypnotised as if you have never seen one in your life, as you have never killed one. You can't shake the feeling that he's familiar to you. Your stupid heart calms down at his proximity, but your mind screams at you to run away from the enemy. And it's right. As always. But you're too stunned to listen to reason, too enchanted by the developments you're seeing in the mirror in front of you.
As he tightens his grip on your wrist, you break out of whatever strange spell you're under, letting your survival instincts take over. You try to fight him, to break free from his grip, but he doesn't seem to care that you are struggling against him. He directs your hand with your bleeding finger to your neck, leaving a trail of blood from your mouth to your neck, collarbone, and shoulder.
You shiver as he finishes, and, keeping his gaze on you in the mirror, he guides your hand to his mouth. The inside of his mouth is warm, his tongue wraps around your finger, drawing in every drop of blood that still escapes from the wound that is healing. He sucks up the last of your blood, licking his lips as he releases your finger.
"Sweet." His soft purring in your ear gives you goosebumps.
He leans down and places a wet kiss on your shoulder. His tongue caresses your skin as he licks up the blood he placed there earlier. You stare at the mirror, frozen, as his pale, almost white skin touches yours as he follows a trail of blood, leaving small bites and a black streak in his wake. You're not sure if it was his saliva that was black or if it was from the paint they probably used on their teeth and the inside of their mouths (or at least you hoped they weren't naturally black).
You fight against him as he peppers your neck with kisses, leaving a few hickeys there. But he's too strong, and with your movements, you rub against him, not causing him any serious pain, which somehow makes him even more aroused. He is pressing the evidence of his... excitement uncomfortably against your ass.
Suddenly, his hand is wrapped tightly around your neck as he turn you to face him and pins you to the mirror. Looking at him through the mirror was completely different from looking at him straight in the eyes. It all felt… more real, however real a figment of your horrible imagination might feel.
He leans down, making you very aware that he had one spot left where your blood was still. Your lips. You try to move away from him, but the more you press yourself against the mirror, the more his body presses against you.
"Oh, she's a little warrior... that makes all of it even sweeter." He chuckles darkly, playing with a strand of your hair. You shiver, feeling his hard length press against your clothed core.
The whispers around you turn into screams and chants as he leans down to kiss the last drop of blood from your lips. You turn your head, causing his pale lips to land on your cheek. You feel his breath against your skin as he chuckles again. He takes the opportunity to lick a path from your cheekbone to your temple before catching your jaw in a tight grip.
"You won't get far, little mouse. Accept your fate." He says, leaning in again, his nose brushing against yours, you feel the cold radiating from him as he digs his fingers hard into your skin as he lazily and leisurely brings his lips to yours...
Feyd opens his eyes as the metal tray clatters against the black marble floor of his chamber.
He automatically reaches for the dagger hidden under his pillow and throws it at one of his concubines, who accidentally dropped the tray down. The other two freeze, staring at their dead sister. The dead body falls to the floor with a thud. The blood quickly begins to pool around the body of the dead harpy.
Feyd smiles, seeing both fear and hunger in their eyes when they see the opportunity to eat good meat. Pathetic. He had warned them not to wake him up today.
"Clean up and get out." He growls at them, furious. He carefully watches as they carry out the body (presumably to feast on it as the remnants of humanity within them lose to starvation) and clean the floor before obediently leaving his chambers.
Furious, he falls on the bed. He covers his eyes with his hand in a feeble attempt to return to his dream and taste your lips. He wonders if maybe it wasn't for the better... after all, he should have tasted the real thing instead of toying with you in dreamland, where his options were... quite limited.
He sighs, taking from the bedside table an empty vial of magical liquid that an old Bene Gesserit witch had given him. To connect with his soulmate in a dream.
As a little boy, he was prophesied that he would only become emperor if his soulmate stood by his side. Of course, his uncle and brother made it difficult for him to find you, believing it to be the mad ravings of an old witch. They said it wasn't the time, that he should train to be a warrior and not play some pathetic character into a romance history, that Giedi Prime needed him more, and that he shouldn't believe the old witches' prophecies and the stupid initials on his wrist. His uncle believes that he will bring him to the highest throne himself. That he doesn't need any whore whose initials match those on Feyd's wrist. That his soulmate will only weaken him.
Soulmates were rare on his 'home planet'. The baron didn't have his. His brother was too cowardly and inept to even think about looking for his own. People here rarely loved anyone other than themselves. Feyd was perfectly fine with it. Until visions began to haunt him in the night. About his soulmate. The hazy future he might have had began to plague him more and more often as he approached his age of maturity.
Before his father died and Feyd killed his mother, he remembers glimpses of good times. Where he was loved. Where he was the apple of his parents' eyes, who were each other's soulmates and loved each other more than life itself. So much so that after his father's death, his mother stopped living. She just existed, not paying attention to anything or anyone, including her own son. Her own blood… By killing her, Feyd ended her suffering and his own at the same time. Did he regret it? Not at all. Not after the training he received at the hands of the Baron.
He told himself that he only wanted to find you because he has promised a great future with you as his wife. That he has to have you if he wants to get to the top. But the passage of time only intensified his sense of loneliness. Longing for someone who is meant for him and who is supposed to be his and only his. Entirely. Willingly. Always by his side. He runs his fingertip thoughtfully over the initials tattooed on his wrist—a daily reminder of the one thing he wants most and which is out of his reach.
Feyd got used to always getting what he wanted. The ruthlessness and cruelty he learned under his uncle's supervision ensured that his every whim would be fulfilled. Either by himself or as a result of his service to the baron when he received gifts from him. But lately, he hasn't been happy with anything. He passively accepted the baron's praise, new concubines, blades, and other gifts. It no longer mattered to him. His ambitions began to grow. And after they had successfully disposed of House Atreides, Feyd realised the possibilities before him. Imperial throne. The promised golden future with his soulmate was within his reach. He just needed to find you and catch you in his iron grip.
You occupied his days, nights, and thoughts when he was fighting in the arena and at the extremely boring council meetings. And it's not like Feyd fell in love. He was incapable of love. Not after everything he's been through. But there was something irresistibly tempting about the idea of having someone who was completely HIS.
He considered it more of an obsession, a desire for something he had never had, something no one had shown him—care, affection, and devotion. And in his visions... in his visions he saw you giving him all these things. So he decided to make it a reality. And when he gets tired of you... he will always have the title of emperor, which you are destined to provide for him. He didn't know exactly how, and maybe he had previously dismissed the Bene Gesserit's prophecies and plots as a bunch of nonsense, but this one seemed... quite good to fulfil and to believe in.
"You asked for me, my na-baron." The artist he commissioned to draw your portrait stands in his doorway, shaking like jelly. He probably heard about how he killed one of his concubines this morning. Feyd had to start getting rid of them. After all, once he has you, he won't need them anymore.
"What took you so long?" He growls at him irritably as he gets out of bed and puts on a black silk robe. Maybe he would have laughed at the terrified man if his first encounter with you in dreams hadn't been so brutally interrupted. He had to find that old hag to give him more of that liquid...
"I arrived as quickly as I could, my lord na-baron. Please let me show you what I managed to create."
Feyd nods at him impatiently, letting him spread out his sketches on the desk. Feyd snaps his fingers at the maid waiting at the door. She pours him a glass of water, which he takes as he lazily saunters along the desk, assessing the sketches the man was supposed to create based on Feyd's description.
"The nose is too small. The jaw is too sharp. Is it supposed to be a woman? Burn it before I burn you. Breasts and hips are too big. Do you think my soulmate has a bulge? It looks like a caricature made by a child." He grades the drawings one by one, going through the dozens of sketches the artist has made over the past three days.
Just as Feyd is about to pick up the dagger from the chest of drawers nearby to kill an incompetent artist, he notices one particular portrait that almost perfectly captures you and your beauty. He takes it between two fingers and looks at it carefully.
"Hmm..." he hums, drinking water. He hands this drawing to the artist. "My congratulations, you managed to keep your head and prove your usefulness. Fix it. Eyes a little smaller, cheeky twinkle. I want a version of this in different outfits. Nobility, beggar, knight, whatever comes to your mind, except a whore, otherwise you'll end up like one. How long will it take you?"
"I…um…a week, my lord?" He almost rolls his eyes and loses his patience with him. If he had a dagger close at hand, he would definitely have plunged it into the man's throat by now.
"You only need one hand to draw. So don't test your lucky, or I will make sure you only have that one. I want to have portaits which fully reflects the beauty of my na-baroness by the end of the week - before I leave to Arrakis. Understood?" He asks, appreciating that the artist has the decency to at least show real fear.
"Yes, my na-baron."
"So don't waste my air."
The relieved artist quickly leaves the room before he changes his mind. Feyd nods to the maid, who follows the man and closes the door behind her. Feyd looks at the portraits on the desk again.
No higher families had a daughter who looked like you. So he had to expand the scope of his search and give orders to his soldiers to... gently capture you (or women like you) and bring them to him. After seeing you clearly in a dream, and not as the result of some distant vision of the future that wasn't that clear, he knew exactly what face he was looking for. He also had initials.
He was thinking about you as his fingertips traced the two precious letters on his wrist. He will find you. He'll look into any hole to do it. You cannot hide from him for long.
You jump up from your bed, your heart beating rapidly as you breathe heavily after waking up from another nightmare.
This went on for a week. You'd be transported from your usual nightmare about Arrakis and put into a black room with a Harkonnen who... was doing completely different things to you than they normally did.
You blush, wiping your sweaty forehead as you remember all the... almost lewd dreams you've had. You curse your imagination for coming up with such a terrible and embarrassing scenario. You began to fear that you were developing some sick desires towards a nation that brutally persecuted your brothers and sisters, disturbed your peace, and murdered more than one friend you had managed to make here.
You should be dreaming of killing them, not of being… groped and defiled by one of them. Especially on the day when you were supposed to rescue your people imprisoned by the Harkonnens.
"Karamakala." Your friend enters your tent. "Move your ass; they're calling for sandworm."
You roll your eyes when she calls you by your tribal name. Due to your… unique skills, the Naib of your sietch bestowed it on you. The miracle of the desert.
Your father wasn't happy about that. That name attracted attention he never wanted. He preferred it when you stayed in the shadows, away from the people you travelled with in the desert. The fact that he even allowed you to go on a rescue mission with them and others was a miracle. He made his decision only through the persuasion of your Naib, who said that only if you were coming with them would they have a chance to recover the prisoners and safely go back to your camp.
You and your friend left the tent fully prepared for the mission, joining the group while waiting for the sandworm to appear. You closed your eyes and took a few deep breaths, trying to feel the monster breaking through the sand. What you felt most strongly was the heartbeat of your companions, but when you focused a little more, you could feel a small heartbeat in the distance, buried several metres beneath the sands of Arrakis. You twist your fingers, controlling the flow of blood from the sandworm's arteries, trying to direct it more towards where you were waiting with your hooks to dig into its body.
"Save your strength for the Harkonnens." Your father's voice booms from behind your shoulder. You sigh and let your hand fall freely, stopping playing with the animal's blood. "I want you close to me; in my sight, no stupid heroic actions, okay? We're in and out as fast as all hell breaks loose, or we get our people back."
"It's just a small base. Even without being outnumbered, we would be able to kill them all."
"Not now. They changed power. Now the baron's youngest nephew gives the orders. A psychopathic, bloodthirsty madman. But he's a good strategist; you have to give him that. He took back control of parts of Arrakis that Muad'Dib had managed to retake, so Harkonnens now again have the lands they once took. And they are not going to stop until the Arrakis is completely theirs. If they go further south we will have to leave this planet." He speaks quietly, carefully observing the people around you. You frown, staring at him in surprise.
"But you said that here was the safest for us to live. Are we supposed to run away like cowards?" You ask indignantly.
He always presented you with a fait accompli, with a decision that he made for you. Which was supposed to be best for you and your safety. But you were tired of constantly running and hiding. You wanted to take your life into your own hands. Contribute to something rather than passively watching the decline of the people you grew up with.
"It is better to be a coward than to be a dead hero. Since you were born, all I have done is protect you. So don't doubt me, daughter. I know what I'm doing." Your father scolds you, readying your hooks as you see sand moving in the distance due to the sandworm's movements.
"It would be much easier if you told me what you are protecting me from, father." You scoff at him, getting even more angry when a sudden gust of wind sends sand flying across your face, stopping in your hair. Your father chuckles, at which you glare madly at him.
"From a fate that is not seeming to be very kind for you."
"Well sometimes we have to accept it." You position yourself next to him, preparing to attach yourself to the body of the sandworm that would take you to the small Harkonnen's military base.
"As long as I'm breathing, I won't let this happen. We create our fate. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise." He says that before you both find yourself on the animal's back. You hide your face behind scarves and safety glasses, preparing for the long road.
Your thoughts involuntarily wander to the Harkonnen you have been dreaming about lately. Maybe a sleep potion could help you get rid of those strange, erotic dreams where one of these monsters is trying to seduce you. You had to test it later.
Feyd takes a swing, driving his spiked whip into the body of a Fremen his men recently captured. He rarely deals with prisoners himself, but lately, when he drinks a Bene Gesserit potion every night just to meet you in his dreams, he feels... frustrated. And he knew of no better way than to take it out on his enemies.
He swings his whip. The man's moans come to him as he recalls his last encounter with you, from which he woke up a few hours ago.
He watches you from the darkness of the chamber. You look gorgeous wearing a black silk nightgown that hugs your body to the delight of his eyes. He notices the muscles you had to develop during combat or training. You must have been much more than just a delicate, pretty petal.
Which made him extremely happy. He liked a good fight. He enjoyed winning them even more.
He approaches you silently, as always, and wraps his arms around your waist. He hums contentedly against your ear, fingertips roaming your body as he makes sure you can't break away from his grip and you're pressed tightly against him.
"You should be used to me being close to you by now, my little warrior." He whispers in your ear, stopping you from fighting him in any way. He doesn't like the way you're so tense in his arms, but he's more than ready to coerce you, gently or not, into cooperating with him.
"Get your hands off me, Harkonen dog!" You growl, elbowing him between the ribs. Feyd grabs your wrists and twists them behind your back, making sure you can't move them. You gasp as he pushes you against the wall, pressing his growing length against your ass.
"Relax, I won't hurt you… yet. Keep acting like that, and I'll tie you up so you won't be able to struggle anymore." He whispers in his husky voice into your ear. He nuzzles your temple, trailing it to your neck. You hold your breath as you feel his teeth graze against your tender skin.
You know that in a moment he will sink his teeth into your body, that he will start marking you with tiny bites and hickeys. This time, however, you want to win the fight with him. You are fully ready to use against him everything you learned on Arrakis.
The moment his teeth pierce your skin, you reach for the blade at his side and push him away from you. You stick the blade out at him, making sure to make a cut on his shoulder before bringing the steel to his pale throat.
He chuckles darkly, watching you carefully as his fingers reach out to his thick black blood flowing from his wound. He licks the blood from his fingers, making sure your eyes follow the way his pink tongue wraps around his fingers, sucking the black liquid from them.
"Clever little thing… believe me, you don't want to know my wrath. Put it down. It's not a toy... well, not for you." He takes a step towards you. Before he manages to get any closer to you, you press the blade against his skin, causing a small cut along his jawline and at his Adam's apple.
Fascinated by the way the black blood flows gently down his throat, you don't notice as he knocks the dagger from your hand. He throws it behind him, causing it to fall to the floor with a thud as he reaches for you.
You growl, kicking, trying to break free from his grip as he carries you across the room. Your efforts intensify when you feel the smooth, velvety material of the sheets beneath you.
He hovers above you, one of his hands grabbing your wrists and pinning them to the mattress above your head. His hard length rubs against your core through the fabric of your clothes. You sigh, trying to push him away or bite him when he leans down to tease the skin of your neck again.
"You smell so beautiful, so different. My little soulmate. So fierce. So brave. My little warrior. I could teach you so many things… if only you would stop hiding from me." You shiver as his fingers trail under your black nightgown. He cups his hand around your breast and plays with your nipple, pinching and nibbling it, wanting to see the little pebbled mounds that lift the black fabric of your clothes. He rolls up the fabric of your nightgown and rubs himself against your bare core, groaning at the way you soak his pants with your unwanted arousal. He throws his shirt aside and grabs your throat in a tight grip, forcing you to look into his eyes whether you want to or not. "But you know what? No matter how far or fast you run, no matter how deep you hide, I will find you. I will find you in every corner of the world. I will follow you. Follow after every trace of you, whether you let me or not, and I WILL find you. I will catch you in my arms, I will dig my claws into you, and I will not let you go. Enjoy your freedom during the day, little warrior, while you still can. But in the darkness of the night, you are utterly mine."
You growl in anger, making one last attempt to fight him off. You lean towards him and bite down roughly on his neck. He groans, digging his fingers and nails into your hips, making you gasp as you feel him leave crescent-shaped marks on your skin.
You take advantage of his moment of inattention and dig your nails into his chest, dragging them across his collarbones and down to his abdominal muscles. You push him away from you, kicking him out of bed, and just as Feyd's head lands on the floor, he wakes up from his dream.
"Na-Baron. We… The Fremen attacked the south gate." One of his soldiers hesitantly approaches him. Feyd glances at him briefly, selecting his dagger from the body of a prisoner, but still watches the soldier out of the corner of his eye.
"What do you mean they attacked us?"
"These rats want to retrieve the transport of prisoners that arrived last week, my lord." The man replies, horrified by the calmness with which Feyd addresses him.
Everyone knew perfectly well that the young Na-Baron could compliment your fighting skills one moment and then slit your throat like nothing happened. He was dangerous in any state of humour. This was common knowledge and opinion that Feyd had been working on for a long time.
He didn't need a reason to do something.
"So gather two troops. Let's have some fun with them. It's not every day that they come willingly and eagerly to their slaughter." Feyd responds with a sneer, readying his blades. It was exactly what he needed—to take his frustration out on those rats who thought they could outsmart him and his men.
You run through the corridors of the Harkonnen's base from the soldiers with your friend by your side. They held your people for several days without water or food; most of them couldn't move on their own, so as soon as you saw a face you had known since childhood among the prisoners, you threw the man's arm over yours and dragged him to the place where the entire squad was supposed to gather.
You hold your breath and hide in one of the side corridors. You hold him close to you and breathe softly, trying not to attract anyone's attention. You manage to reach your group of men safely, but that's where your luck ends.
Within moments, a group of Harkonnens surrounds you. You must disperse. Each of you is on your own after you manage to attach your unconscious friends to a sandworm's body so they can survive the trip to your sietch.
You manage to avoid most of the Harkonnen soldiers, and you kill those who get in your way without blinking an eye. You're halfway to the second emergency exit you and your men had marked out before raiding the base when you bump into someone as you run to another corridor.
You gasp, trying to regain your balance. You freeze when you recognise the black Harkonnen's armour on the arms, which keeps you from falling to the floor. You look up and freeze, seeing the same blue irises that haunt you in your nightmares.
"Well, well... what do we have here?" You're shaking. His voice in real life is as hoarse, deep, and dark as in your nightmares. He is exactly as you dreamed of him. You hate the way your body somehow recognises him and automatically relaxes in his arms—the way his scent and closeness have become familiar to you.
You struggle in his arms and manage to push him away from you. You run as fast as you can, trying to lose him among the corridors. You hear his raspy laugh behind you before his quick footsteps begin to echo down the empty halls as he follows after you.
You scream as he lunges at you and pins you to the stone floor. You struggle under him, kicking and trying to scratch him, but he grabs your wrists in his strong grip.
"Take it easy, little warrior. We knew from the beginning how it would end. Do not move. I don't want to hurt you, but I will if you try to escape." You sigh, closing your eyes. You freeze, focusing on your surroundings, your mind racing as you wonder how to get out of his arms and this place. You shiver when you feel his nose brush against yours. "Exactly like this. Beautifully. That's my pretty girl. Who would have thought you would be one of those rats?"
"Be careful with your words." You growl, enduring the intense gaze of his blue eyes.
He laughs hoarsely and leans in. His full lips brush against yours in a kiss. First, he takes his time checking how far he can go, but when he sees that you are not trying to bite him, push him away, or run away, he deepens the kiss. His hand tangles in your hair, and the other frees your wrists to trace you through your Fremen attire.
For a moment, you allow yourself to lose yourself in the feeling of his lips, the way he caresses your lips so gently and with such passion, and the way he practically wants to devour you just because he actually can—that this is not one of your dreams but reality. A reality that Feyd was yearning for so long—too long—to even admit.
Eventually, however, you manage to break free from his strange charm. You run your hands down his chest to his hips. He moans into your mouth, entwining his tongue with yours. You reach for his dagger and stab him in the back without blinking an eye. You push him off of you, and, ignoring his growl, you get up and continue running away.
Your heart is beating like crazy, and your muscles are starting to ache from exerting yourself for so long, but you continue running until you can no longer hear any footsteps behind you. You sigh in relief as you reach a group of other Fremen. You are getting ready to evacuate; you are about to summon a sandworm when another group of Harkonnens attacks you again.
You look around in panic, searching for your father in the crowd, but you can't find him anywhere. Your heart speeds up, and adrenaline rushes through you, speeding up your reactions to the blows. You fight like crazy, not stopping even for a moment. However, you notice that slowly, the Harkonnens are starting to win. You signal to your companions and retreat into the desert. You release a small bomb whose main purpose is to raise the sand and create a cover for you.
The sands of Arrakis swirl around you. You run forward, trying to get as far away from the base as possible. As far away from HIM as possible.
Your lungs hurt from the sand you inhale. You want to cough and cry from the sand getting into your eyes, but you don't stop running. You gasp as the sand beneath your feet suddenly begins to move strangely. Strangely familiar. You curse under your breath, realising that the sandworm is about to appear in a second.
And suddenly, you feel like being back in your nightmare. You see the mouth of a sandworm again. You stare at his teeth again, a black abyss that is soon going to swallow you completely. You stand there frozen, completely forgetting about all your training, as if you had accepted a long time ago that this is how you were going to die.
And everything happens exactly as in your nightmare. Only this time, as you surrender to the darkness around you, you hear the roar of the ship's engine and the harsh language of the Harkonnens when you pass out.
You feel your head pounding. Huge pain, as if thousands of tiny needles were being stuck into your temples. You open your eyes, squinting as you adjust to the dimness around you. Judging by the immense pain you felt, you definitely weren't dead. Or you did, and you were in hell now; you weren't sure yet. You look around you, noticing a fire in the middle of the small cave you were in. You lean back on your elbows and freeze when you see Harkonnen's bald, pale head.
You get up silently and move to where your gun was, looking carefully at the man kneeling by the radio who was trying to transmit a signal. With a knife in your hand, you begin to examine your surroundings more closely. You notice that the entrance to the cave has been blocked by a ship. If you wanted to escape, you had to get past or kill Harkonnen and guide the ship out of this place.
"If I were you, I wouldn't do that, little warrior." A shiver runs through you as you hear the familiar, raspy voice that has tormented you in your dreams many times. You tighten your grip on the blade's handle and point the tip of it at him, maintaining your fighting stance. "You have a torn ankle ligament, a minor concussion, and you're dehydrated. Even with your knowledge of the desert, you won't survive there when a sandstorm rages. Here." He turns to you for a moment and throws the water bottle at you. You grab it with one hand, still eyeing him warily.
He speaks something in his language; you only manage to recognise a few words, such as Na-Baron, Dune, reinforcements, ship, and your location data. When he finishes, he stands up, turns to you, and furrows his hairless eyebrows, watching you closely.
"Drink. You'll feel better." He says this and sits down by the fire as if nothing had happened. You blink a few times, staring at him in shock as you try to understand why he acts so strangely... calm. You step back and hiss as your foot goes out of alignment, straining the torn muscle. "I told you so."
"Where are we?" You ask, wincing at the sound of your hoarse voice. He stares pointedly at the bottle of water in your hands, but you'd rather die than try anything he gave you.
He sighs, annoyed, and stands up. You raise your knife, pointing it at him as he starts to walk towards you. However, he doesn't stop, only when the tip of the blade pierces gently into his chest. He reaches for the water bottle and unscrews it. He takes a small sip and licks his lips, giving you a glimpse of his black teeth.
"Not far from our base. Your people summoned a sandworm. If I hadn't flown the ship to you and taken you away, it would have swallowed you. A moment later, a sandstorm came, and I had to take us to a safe place. We'll wait it out here, and you'll come back with me to the main stronghold. So be a good girl and listen to me while I feel like going easy on you. I guess you can do this for me for saving you, right, my desert rose?"
"You do one decent thing and expect me to submit to you? I didn't ask you to save me, and besides, I think in the grand scheme of things, one saved life doesn't do anything to make up for the many others that you took." You reply furiously and take the water bottle from him. You take a few sips, appreciating the way it soothes the dryness of your chapped lips and throat.
"Said the woman who killed 10 of my men with a small knife." He replies, amused. His eyes linger on your mouth for a moment as you lick your lips, spreading the holy water across them. Feyd has a strong desire to lean in and kiss you; maybe even let you stick your little knife into him...
"It's not my fault they are so incompetent." You say, pushing past him and walking towards the fire. The night was starting to fall, and it was starting to get colder in the cave. You sit next to the fire, wrapping your arms around yourself and staring into the flames as you try to ignore HIS presence.
"Things I could do to you…" He mumbles to himself as you brush your arm against his. Your scent reaches his nostrils, and Feyd closes his eyes, inhaling it like a drug. He imagines things he wanted to do to you, things that would make him feel more closely that sweet scent coming from you.
Goosebumps appear on your skin as he takes a few steps closer to you and stands behind you. You try to ignore him, but the burning sensation where his initials are carved into your wrist keeps you from forgetting who the Harkonnen you are trapped with is. You tense as he drops to his knees next to you. He places his hand on your ankle, and you almost make a move to kick him when you feel his low growl in your ear.
"Relax. I just want to check your leg. You almost lost it in the mouth of a sandworm." With one hand, he pushes you to lean against his chest. You reluctantly let him, becoming more and more aware of the burning sensation in your leg.
He takes off your shoe and places it in your hands. He takes his time, slowly peeling off the layers of fabric. You are surprised to see that you already have a dressing—a dressing that is soaked in your blood. You shiver, feeling his fingertips on your skin as he unwraps the bandage. You hiss as he tears the fabric away from your slick skin, fully showing you your wound. A few centimetres deeper, and you wouldn't be able to move it.
"I need to disinfect this again. When we get back to base, we'll give you the anti-venom serum." He hums, leaving you for a moment. He walks over to the ship and pulls out a first-aid kit. You wince as you move so you can rest your back against the cave wall.
"I'm not coming back with you anywhere." You growl, still gripping your knife tightly, though in your current state, you realise you're not that much of a threat to him. He snorts at your response, kneeling down next to you. You bite your lip as he disinfects your wound and begins to bandage it.
"Hush, little warrior. You're talking nonsense because of the effects of the venom." His condescending tone makes your blood boil. You tilt your leg to make it harder for him to bandage you, and he just gives you a furious look before returning to his task without a word. You frown, staring at him. To be honest, you would rather expect him to stab you, cut you into pieces, and eat you than voluntarily take care of you and your health.
"Why are you doing this?" He stops what he's doing and looks at you like you're an idiot, like you asked the most absurd question possible.
He reaches for your hand. You tense up, ready to elbow him in the teeth, but you stop when you see him gently roll up the fabric of your linen shirt and wrap his hand around your wrist. You shiver as his thumb strokes the initials on your wrist.
"Can't you guess, a snarky little thing?" You remove your hand from his grip and hug your knees to your chest, curling into a ball and watching him warily.
"You do not know me. You kill people like me without blinking an eye."
"I do." He says, staring at you intensely, as if that fact had no significance and shouldn't affect your opinion of him. "And you kill people like me. I guess we can call it even."
"I do it only because you are invading our land and people! You are desecrating our holy places; you have no respect for our culture; you treat us worse than... don't look at me like that." You whisper the last sentence, moving closer to the wall as he leans into you. You swallow, shifting your gaze from his blue irises to his bloody hands. Large, rough, bloody hands. Bloody hands that could touch you so well in your dreams.
"Like what?" He asks hoarsely, reaching his hand to cup your cheek. You shiver as he spreads your burgundy blood there. You close your eyes and breathe shakily, which is your biggest mistake. He takes advantage of your distraction and leans down to lick the blood from your cheek.
He moves away from you. His eyes are locked on you as he wraps his lips around the finger of his other hand. You lick your lips involuntarily, watching him lick your blood from his fingers. You shake your head and clear your throat, moving away from him as far as you can, feeling one of the rocks dig into your back.
"Like that." You mutter, shifting your gaze to the flames in the fire.
"Why?"
"You know why. We… we are from two completely different worlds."
"Are we?" He asks, moving closer to you. You shiver as his arms wrap around you, and he rests his chin on your shoulder. His warm breath against your ear makes you feel warmer—something you don't want to admit to yourself and something he noticed the moment your shoulders shuddered slightly at the coldness emitting from the cave walls. You still hold the knife stubbornly in your hand, as if it would somehow protect you from Harkonnen.
You sit there in silence. You let him cuddle you, enjoying a little of the warmth he gives you. You sigh, trying to ignore how good you felt in his arms and how his scent enveloped you nicely, making your eyes close on their own. However, you try to remain vigilant, still unable to trust him in any way.
You sigh as he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you closer to his chest. He lies down on the blanket he spread for you earlier and covers you with the other one, making sure that you are comfortable and warm. You don't try to argue with him or get out of his arms. You know there's no point in fighting him. It's starting to get colder, and he's becoming a better source of heat with each minute you are in his arms.
You know that if anyone in your sietch saw you right now, cuddled up to the Harkonnen, sharing your body heat with him, you would be banished, maybe even sentenced to death for associating with the enemy.
You had very conflicted feelings about him. Your mind was screaming at you, telling you to come to your senses and plunge your knife into Harkonnen's heart while you had the chance, but your heart, a strange instinct, was drawing you to him, encouraging you to bury your face in the crook of his neck and listen to his soft breathing.
Your heart speeds up slightly as he reaches out to intertwine his hand with yours, the one that still holds the knife. He pulls you closer to him, his arms trapping you in an iron-tight embrace. His lips brush against your earlobe as he whispers to you, his husky tone of voice giving you goosebumps.
"Are you afraid of me, my little warrior?"
You swallow and close your eyes, grateful that he can't see your face, which is blushing involuntarily. You wonder what's wrong with you to react to him like this and why the mark of your soulmate, or rather, his initials on your wrist, burns you hotter than the sun of Arrakis has ever done.
"Of course I am. You're a Harkonnen. You are our greatest enemy. I hate you just as much as I fear you."
"And as much as you desire me?" A gasp escapes your lips as his other hand is suddenly under your clothes. You can't help but moan as his fingertips tease your bundle of nerves, gradually moving to the spot where your juices ungodly and humiliatingly leak out of you. Your water. "You think I can't smell you? That I don't see the way you tremble every time I touch you? The way warmth radiates from you every time I'm this close? I may not have known you here while awake, but I know you from our dreams. I recognise your every little reaction to me, to my touch, to my kisses. And what's more, my little warrior, you are breaking more than one law of your people. You give me your water in such a sinfully delicious way, and you don't even know my name."
You squirm in his arms, but he holds you tightly with his other hand, so all you do is rub against his hand in your feeble attempt to escape. You tighten your grip on the knife, but that's all you can do as he explores areas of you no one has ever had access to before. You're helpless, too dizzy from the sudden, intense pleasure he also gave you in your dreams. You never thought you could feel such... sensations while awake. Pleasant experiences.
"Maybe I should give you something you can moan and scream, hmm? Tell me, sweetheart, do you want to know whose fingers are touching you? Who do you give your precious water to? Who showed you things in our dreams that you would be ashamed to mention to your people?"
It's embarrassing. The way he made you melt under his touch. All you could do was moan and grind against his hand as he brought you immense pleasure. You move your hand with the knife and press the blade against his neck at the back of his head. You trace patterns on the skin of his bald head with your finger, resting your head on his shoulder as a wave of an unfamiliar feeling washes over you, cutting off all your senses. All you can feel is your core and his fingers as they continue to push into your depths, intensifying your indescribable pleasure.
"Feyd." He whispers into your ear, biting the lobe. You repeat his name stupidly, moaning and screaming it as he teases your over-aroused core, making your water flow out of you uncontrollably a second time, wetting your pants and his hand.
When he finally removes his hand from your pants, you shiver uncontrollably, curled up on his chest. You breathe quickly, staring at the cave's stone ceiling, waiting for your brain to finally reconnect with your body. You gasp as he pushes his fingers through your mouth, forcing you to taste yourself.
"Don't waste your water. Sweet, right, little warrior? When we get home, I'll spend a week between those beautiful legs. You'll wrap them tight around me, won't you? Will you dig your heels and claws into me, pressing my face against this wonderful source of water in this damn desert?" The way he talks to you, so blatant and disgusting, should make you stab a knife into his throat without a moment's hesitation. Instead, you let the blade fall next to his head as you tried to recover from what you just experienced. You're warm. Hot. And you want more. You need more.
He takes your hand and guides it to the bulge in his pants. You sigh, feeling all of his glory. And suddenly you feel extremely empty.
"Mmm… another time. Sleep." He mumbles and presses a kiss on your temple. His arms wrap painfully tight around you as he makes sure there is no space between you. The cocoon of blankets keeps you warm from your... last sensation at his hands. And you feel as embarrassed about it as you feel comfortable lying in the warmth.
You allow yourself to listen to his calm breathing. He don't fall asleep. Neither do you. You both wait to see who will faint from exhaustion first, and as much as you want to surrender to sleep, you know that the moment you close your eyes, you seal your fate forever. You will irreversibly become Harkonnen's prisoner.
Feyd's prisoner. Na-Baron's captive. You don't want this fate.
So close your eyes, relax your muscles, and slow down your breathing. Pretending to fall asleep is all you can fool him with, because yes, he saw you in your dreams in various situations and knew you inside and out, but he didn't know one thing. He didn't know what you looked like when you fell asleep.
You didn't know what he looked like when he was sleeping either, so you took a little risk with your not-so-well-thought-out plan, but you knew it was the only way to somehow escape from Harkonnen's grasp.
You wait a bit for him to relax, too. He puts his chin on your head, hugging you like some cuddly toy. But you know better than to assume that these monsters have some cuddly toys. If anything, teethers with spikes.
You lie there for a good few minutes, maybe even hours, going over your escape plan in your head. You breathe calmly, thinking about what you will do if you fail... you can always stab yourself if things don't go your way.
You quickly reach for the knife and plunge it into his knee. You twist it, damaging his joint, so he can't follow you, and you stand up. His screams and growls make you ignore the pain in your leg and run towards the ship that was blocking the exit. Somehow you manage to open it, your hands shaking as you unlock the door. Somehow he manages to get up and walk towards you, approaching dangerously fast, but you are more agile than him. You lock yourself inside the ship, break the window on the other side, and run forward.
You ignore his screams and threats and run deep into the desert, knowing full well that he won't catch up with you. The sandstorm had long ended, and the sun had risen again over Arrakis. You were in your territory; you were unstoppable.
You feel remorse, but only a little. You know perfectly well that the Harkonnens were incapable of love. You would be his prey and nothing else. You had to run away from him as far as you could.
And if he wanted to chase you? You would let him.
He could follow you wherever he wanted, but here on Arrakis, he could never catch you. And you really hoped you wouldn't have to run away from him to another planet.
#feyd rautha x reader#feyd rautha x you#feyd rautha x y/n#feyd rautha#feyd rautha harkonnen x reader#feyd rautha harkonnen#feyd x reader#feyd oneshot#house harkonnen#dune part 2#oneshot#feyd supremacy#feyd rautha harkonnen x you#dark romance#romance#feyd rautha smut#soulmates#pinning#obsessive love#toxic behavior
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Change My Mind [5]
Pairing: BTS x reader
SUMMARY: As a make-up artist, you were expected to glamorize your clients with brushes and products that cost a week-worth of food, not to befriend them outside of work, let alone have them save you from dates yet here you are five years later as one of their closest confidants.
Being a stylist of the world's biggest boyband is no easy feat, someone is doing flips, someone can't stay still and one's asleep but its fine, you can work around their chaos but then one day, you find out they're all your soulmates, a whole different can of chaos you don't think you can handle.
Tags: Soulmates AU, Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, Not Beta Read, Slow Build, Polyamory, Attempts at Humor
Words: 9.4k
So I edited chapter 3 where Yoongi told Reader to wait till next year for their contract renewal because from the discourse on twt yesterday, they renewed their contract October later in 2018 (which is the year this is taking place).
Gonna stop yapping so here's a 9.4k chapter with a lot of explaining, i hope it all makes sense oh lord this chap is not beta read AT ALL. ALSO WTF IS WITH THE TAGS THEY'RE NOT WORKINGGGGGG
thank you all for your comments and likes, it keeps me going :DD
<<<Prev || MASTERLIST || Next>>>
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Namjoon was a man of science.
He believes in everything that can be explained in a lengthy and intricately detailed book filled with an even more difficult terminologies and worded examinations backed up by photographic evidence to prove it.
To him, if he didn't see it happen before his very eyes, it was fiction, a lie.
It's how it should be.
As a child, he frowned upon the heretics and the desperate, thanking a nonexistent god for the fruit of their hard work. He couldn’t fathom how they could weep so genuinely as they prayed on their knees for blessings that never come, and if gods were real, he could never understand how devoted they are for someone who turned a blind eye to the challenges they faced.
He never understood how the lonely could resort to immorality in their desperation for a soulmate, couldn't fathom how easily they shed their humanity for a morsel, a hint of that sense of belonging and importance being a tethered gave.
It was dumb.
Life doesn't revolve around soulmates, they should've tried other options instead of blaming the theoretical nirvana for their own misfortune.
Despite being a child born from two mates, he never believed in the concepts of soulmates, thinking it childish as it was an idea the lonely and the hopeless hung onto to feel better for themselves. He believed that his parents would have met either way without their soulmarks, would've fallen in love the same and bring him to life.
Because they were meant to be, even without the marks to prove it.
Sure he wished to eventually settle down with someone who also loved him as his mother does with his father but he doesn't believe in the spiritual connection.
But science has nothing on the sensation he was feeling right now.
The moment the clock struck midnight, a heartbeat suddenly began to drum at the back of his head, but it was faint and muffled as if it was distant and came through multiple walls but he could hear its panicked pace echoing in his skull. In the silence you and Jungkook’s departure has left, Namjoon began to feel dread bubbling inside him. A tension slowly building up with the beat of the racing heart at the back of his head.
It felt like those slowly crescending notes of a horror movie's background music as the killer stalks nearer. There's a tension thickening but he's the only one who could feel it, could sense it coming.
It's making him nervous beyond belief how he doesn't know what is afoot.
A gasp tore through his thought process and he looked up to see his Yoongi hyung eyeing something invisible in his right hand, disbelief apparent in his wide eyes as the others turned to him with concerned curiosity.
But Namjoon already knew what it was, at least felt like he knew what it is, although he himself is incredulous.
He's read up everything that he could about soulmates in his teenage years wanting to refute his parents' insistence on how they wouldn't have clicked as well as they are without the soulmark yet none of them could explain how he just knows the heartbeat at the back of his head belonged to you.
________
Fate truly has a funny way of revealing who your soulmate is.
It was said that the sensation when you first meet your soulmate should be a wave of cold relief flushing all the worries out of your system. Your mother and Jihae told you stories of the sudden sense of belonging, like finding the last piece of the puzzle from a mere accidental brush of a hand with a stranger on the streets.
If it was in any other scenario, you would've agreed with them.
But as Jungkook raises both your hands to survey the skin for any mark, your world shrinks down like an air tight ziplock bag to only fit you and him. A low thrum resonated in the air, mellifluous and sweet, a direct contrast to the dull but racing heartbeat at the back of your head. Jolts of electricity vibrated under your skin starting from your joined hands and spreading across your muscles and lighting your nerve endings awake.
The walls around you closed in, not because it was Jungkook who you happened to be fated to. But because there's a thin, red thread tied around your pinkie.
A red string of fate.
And it's not tethered to Jungkook.
It goes behind you and you dread to know who it leads to.
There's a curious tug from down the line, the thread turning tangible at every pull and the urge to run away, to hide in the comforts of your home grew tenfold. Because you're sure the string leads to one of the boys.
People who became your closest companions after years of being their make-up artist. Half of which you've rejected before and four of them you've remained friends with.
Isn't this a bit too much of a joke?
How funny it must've been for the divinities to watch you reject the men eventually revealed to be your soulmate. They must've cackled, pointing fingers and all, as they watched you reject them. You wouldn’t put it behind them to connect the end of your string to someone you’ve also turned down.
You watched Jungkook speedrun through the five stages of grief in a few seconds, face contorting every so often it made it hard to get a read on what he's feeling. He let out a shaky exhale as he came to, doe eyes meeting yours with an incredulous sheen.
His continuous silence stuffed cottons into your throat, the conflicted expression he has settled on only furthering the panic in your chest.
You retract your hand but he was faster, catching your wrist in a tighter grip. There's a question hanging from his lips but they cease to exist the moment you both see the mark on your finger.
In the space between your index and middle finger lies a black quarter note, inked into the skin of your middle. The tint bold and black.
Raising his own hand, your eyes landed on the same pattern etched on his on the opposite side. As if hypnotized, he intertwined his fingers and the same gentle thrum came back, along with a comforting warmth echoing from your soulmate mark and spreading throughout your body, almost rendering you boneless from how intense yet easily it relieved you of the stress on your body.
You weren't the only one affected by its calming properties. The frustration and anger in Jungkook's from earlier now erased from his face, as if it was never there. Acceptance.
Just like that, the problem is solved; and that unsettles you.
“Noona… Wh-what is happening?”
His voice is so small, shaky and hopeful . Eyes growing larger as he surveys your soulmate marks with a joyful disbelief. He untangled your hand and pulled the soulmark closer to his eye. Curiously, Jungkook hesitantly taps the musical note and shivered with you when skin touched skin.
You both suck in a deep breath, freezing at the foreign sensation it brought you both before a smile that stretches high up to the heavens brightens his face.
Jungkook's eyes were glazed with unshed tears when you found them once more, breath shaky as he placed a kiss onto your knuckles. The sensation of his lips on your skin sending jolts down your spine.
“Noona, we're soulmates.”
You didn't even hear the sound of footsteps running up the stairs nor Taehyung calling you both until he got close, hand landing on your shoulder and effectively snapping you out of your trance.
“Are you guys okay? Not too long ago you were at each other's throat and now—woah!”
A shrill of pleasure shocks your body, vision flashing white and you fall. If it wasn't for Jungkook, you would've collapsed boneless next to Taehyung who's gasping on the floor, hand clutching his heart as he heaved. Jungkook let you lean your body weight on him once you stood up again. Arms wrapping around your waist protectively as your brain catches up.
A sharp gasp from Jungkook kick starts your already racing heart, panic flushing out whatever has happened earlier.
But that wasn't the thing that made your head pulse.
It was the shaky utterance of your name and looking up at Jungkook only to be distracted by the faint glow of blue in the shape of a hand on your shoulder. The spot where Taehyung had last touched you.
In the dimness of the hallway, it gleamed a soft shade of purple like a splatter of glow in the dark paint. Your head snapped back to Taehyung who had pushed himself to sit up, cradling his head while murmuring intelligible under his breath until he looked up and his jaw fell .
“I-Is that…?”
“Hyung, what is the meaning of this?”
Taehyung turned to the maknae, spluttering. “I-I don't even… Ho-how is this even possible?”
How is it possible to feel like the world has pulled a carpet from under you while also feeling like you're laying on cloud 9?
Three soulmates.
Two of them being people you once rejected, one of them unknown but the string suspiciously led downstairs where the rest of the boys are.
You feel like passing out just to avoid the talk it'll entail. Maybe you should run at the wall and hope you'll hit your head hard enough to guarantee amnesia.
“Noona, you're seeing this too right?”
Taehyung is now standing in front of you, bewilderment still dancing in his eyes as he traced the already fading handprint and a small line of purple followed. He grinned and it's probably the happiest one you've ever seen him wear, eyes misty and overflowing with joy as he giggled, the sound almost reminiscent of an excited child.
Jungkook’s arm tightened around you.
“Wh-why do you have paint on noona’s shoulder? Hyung?” Jungkook’s voice shakes from the weight of the revelation hanging above his head. “Are we sharing noona?”
“GUYS! YOONGI HYUNG GOT A SOULMATE!”
Holy shit.
Unlike you who's despairing to see the man on the other side of the thread, Taehyung was beyond ecstatic.
“No fucking way. I gotta see this.”
Taehyung dragged you to the stairs when your legs refused to move, uprooting you from where you leaned onto Jungkook's side. Your stomach churned at how lighter the strings felt in your pinkie and a tad tighter as the distance shortened.
There's a sudden heartbeat racing in your ears but it sounds far away and it doesn't sync with the pulse you feel in your temples. You couldn't dwell on it for long before you're faced with the man at the other end of the line.
They said it all started with their eldest but unbeknownst to them, he was the first to notice how your eyes would light up as if it held the entire galaxy, how you’d laugh and he thought it sounded like the sweetest jingles of wedding bells to his ears.
Seokjin might be their eldest but he was the beginning of it all.
In his twenty five years of existence on this damned planet, Min Yoongi has never asked for much, content with whatever life throws at him.
Even with his harsh upbringing, he never kept what he has from others, especially since he met his brothers. He'd willingly ripped off the cloth from his back to keep them warm and plugged their ears with both his hands so they couldn’t hear the hateful words thrown at them at debut, even if it cost of being exposed to them instead. But he couldn't care less, Yoongi loves them with all his heart.
There's nothing in the world that could ever stop him from bending over backwards just so the others could live peacefully.
When his pockets grew heavier with age, this trait only bloomed further into millions donated anonymously to hospitals and charities he could stumble upon.
To everyone, especially his brothers, he’s a generous man.
Until you strode into his life and haunted him in his waking days with the ghost of your touch caressing his face.
Min Yoongi never wants yet he yearned, he craved to feel the softness of your skin under his fingertips, to taste your lips and discover if you tasted as sweet as you smell, to run his hand through your hair as to know if it's as soft as it looked under the soft glow of the room.
And for once in his life, he wanted to be selfish.
Being with you makes him want to believe, want to hope that something nonsensical as the concept of soulmates is true.
Min Yoongi wasn’t a believer of such optimism because his mother wasn’t. She passed down her resentment for the fates for turning a blind eye on her onto her next of kin. She was bitter from being untethered and barred her children from subjecting themselves to whimsical thoughts of fates and destinies. But now that you’ve come and bursted through the iron doors of his heart, he started to wonder if the divine had purposely tripped you in front of the BigHit building to be discovered by their oldest make-up noona and lead you to them.
He knew they did, could feel it within him.
There was something different about you on the first day you've both met, something that he couldn't find in others and his mind answered almost immediately.
Soulmate.
You who shined even without the help of others, who stood out like the beacon of light in the shady pits of this world, he couldn’t dare face you as someone whose future is as dim as the blasted world he cursed out. With nothing to offer, he strived to be the best, to crawl to the top whatever it takes.
He couldn't show you a pathetic side of him, couldn't step forward with a bleak future to offer. Yoongi wouldn't be able to bear it if you were to grow miserable beside him.
Because for you, he'd stop at nothing to hand everything you'd ever lay your eyes on wrapped in a pretty bow of the most expensive quality and tucked neatly behind soft colored gift wrappers.
For years, Min Yoongi hid.
What else could he do when most of his brothers also vied for your attention? He loved you all with all his heart, couldn't bear the thought of ever hurting any of you for his selfish desires. So he did what he thought was best, step back and watch from the sidelines.
And he was fine with that.
He thinks himself a patient man. A trait forged by years of encountering nagging customers and demanding adults from working as a delivery boy. Yet all it took was a couple dozen bottles of Soju and a warm atmosphere to accidentally confess his feelings for you. Ashamed and already knowing what his hyung has received as an answer, he puts on a mask the next day and acts.
He did it so well you were convinced he wasn't kidding by forgetting last night's mistakes and swallowing up the disappointment when you didn’t bother asking him again and acted like nothing ever happened.
But it's okay, Min Yoongi is a patient man, he can wait.
So when you appeared before him, a red string tied prettily around your pinkie with the thread leading back to his own, he was beyond euphoric .
He felt like he could climb the highest summit bare in record speed with no equipment and only the warmth of the new bond.
The moment you all appeared in the living room with your shoulder and linked hands glowing purple, all hell broke loose. You didn't even get to look at Yoongi’s reaction when everyone was exploding around you, running to look at the evidence of your connection to Taehyung up close.
“Holy shit!”
“What the fuck?!”
“You guys are connected?!”
“What the fuck is happening right now?!”
Taehyung, despite being the second guy discovering himself as your soulmate, kept a smug smile hovered protectively behind you, hands planted on your shoulders and pushing his hyungs a few steps away to keep them from overwhelming you.
Everyone surrounding you had varying reactions even then, Namjoon kept his distance but hovered over behind his brothers with his eyebrows furrowed, staring with his calculating gaze and the heartbeat echoing at the back of your head grow rampant.
You didn’t dare look at Seokjin, whose gaze weighed heavily with hurt and disappointment, penetrated through your skin, especially when you heard him run upstairs, and the door of his room slams shut.
He who had confessed first, had continued to love you even when you had thought he had moved on, somehow didn’t make the cut. Another cruel joke the fates have played.
It was Jimin who snapped you out of the trance when he grazed the side of your neck and flinched back when swirls of gold erupted from the spot he ghosted over before both your knees buckled. The gleaming gold ink spinning a pretty vine-like twirl before sinking back into your skin.
If the room was loud earlier, it has erupted into a mass hysteria now.
Because four out of your seven bosses turn out to be tethered to you. Three who you had rejected before and one who has never shown any romantic interest in you.
How funny was it for the universe to link you to the same men you've rejected for the fear of ruining the amazing brotherhood they've built from years of hard work and tears?
The sensation of two cascading waves of calmness from the bonds trying to soothe the ever growing dread clashed against each other made your stomach churn. Your headache has evolved into a pulsing one before you felt a tug on the string. From the revelation to the onslaught of feelings attacking and fighting off your initial panic, your body struggled to keep up with its conflicting emotions.
You wanted to run, to hide from their gaze, to put an end to the conflicted mess of emotions being forced into you and surfacing along with your thoughts.
Jimin has refrained from touching you since earlier, his beautiful face now contorted into concern, his soft eyes seeing past the fog in yours while the world continues around you. He stares at you as if trying to decipher something, as if he could somehow feel how overwhelmed you are.
He opened his mouth to say something, his hands already reaching to pull Taehyung and Jungkook away from you when a voice broke through the chatter.
“You're crowding her too much!”
Namjoon’s hands were steadying when he held your shoulders, like water in a desert, like the light at the end of a dark tunnel. With their leader stepping in, all words fell into a hush and for the first time since the chaos, it was silent; save for the slowing rhythms of two heartbeats thudding in your head.
If Taehyung and Jungkook's touch felt like a jolt of energy and Jimin was rejuvenating and healing, Namjoon had the ability to kill the noise in your mind with eye contact alone.
Peering deeper into his gaze, your breath stutters because the knowing glint within them has confirmed another thought of yours. Shared heartbeats . Suddenly the other beat in your head sounded clearer, more present along with your thoughts.
A fifth soulmate.
What the fuck.
“Hyung, are you sober enough to drive?”
Hoseok turns to him, face turning serious as he glances at you once more before nodding.
“I’ll get her home, I didn't drink much anyways.”
It felt burdensome to leave such a life-altering problem for them to handle while you cower in their spare bedroom, trying to hide from the reality that you might be linked to all seven of them.
The reassuring squeeze on your shoulders brought you back from the guilty trans you’ve submerged into and was faced with Namjoon's kind eyes and smile.
“Go home noona, we'll handle it from here.”
“You sure?”
He nods. “I know this is overwhelming so I want you to go rest and let me do the planning and talking, alright?”
When you didn’t respond, Namjoon wrapped his arms around you. There’s hesitance in how his movement stuttered, could hear him ponder as he pulled you flush to his chest, afraid of affecting you like the maknaes had but when his touch didn’t evoke the staggering flood of euphoria, he grew more sure of his movements.
With a kiss on your head, he unwraps himself from you and gently guides you back to Hoseok who’s now standing outside the open door of their dorm. His eyes were glued onto you, following your form as you near him but somehow, it felt like he was staring past through you and into the void.
Walking to the car was a silent affair and you don’t know if you rather have Hoseok being quiet or not.
It was bearable when he turned on the radio and a song that has no connection to the boys plays, not that it ever stopped the thoughts constantly spawning from the crevices of your mind.
When you had asked the fates for a soulmate, had you sounded so desperate that they'd given you five?
You’ve heard of three souls connected, hell, Yeonjun is a part of a five-way soulmate link; Interlinked, is what they’re called. Everyone in the group has their own unique mark with each member which usually led to constant overstimulation in the beginning, which made the company put them on medications until their bond settles a year later.
Even today, there are times where they still get affected by their bonds, although not as often as it used to. It was a wonder how there haven't been investigations put on BigHit with how often the five had to be sent to the hospital for soulbond hyperactivity at least once a week for a whole year.
But a nexus between six people, five connected to one. That is unheard of, the rarest even.
Five soulmates yet none of those were Seokjin. Someone who had stuck with you since the first day, the first to confess, and the one who remained loyal, wasn’t tethered to you.
“Hoba?’
“Yes, noona?”
He sounded guarded, his face ironed into a neutral, more serious expression as he slowed as the traffic light went red.
“What’s gonna happen now?”
He bit his lower lip as he pondered, thumbs tapping incessantly on the wheel before he spoke.
“We're gonna have to update your statuses in the DFR, but I doubt the company will make it public just yet. There's nothing also in our contract that prohibits us from pursuing a relationship with our soulmates if we ever come across them so you're good on that front.”
You notice how he excluded himself from the Nexus bond and you feel a pinch on your heart at how formal he has become, as if he’s already put up a wall between you both.
“We'll probably have a long talk about it once I get back but I doubt they'd wait that long for me. You’re probably wouldn't be allowed to touch Jimin and Taehyung anymore when you're working because your soulmarks are very obvious and I know you don't want—”
“Y-You don't think you're also…”
Silence followed as he adjusted himself in his seat as the car began to move again, his hands drumming on the wheel halts as the facade he's wearing shattered for a moment and his eyes grew foggy, clouded by a deep shade of blue.
Under the passing warm lights of the streetlights overhead, Hoseok has never looked more devastated to you than he does now.
You had never noticed it, he has always been open with his affections to his friends so you never thought of it as anything but his usual touchiness. He shows his care for you in the same way he does with his brothers, so paid it no need and brushed it off.
How could Soobin notice it? What had he seen that you missed?
“If I was, I would've felt something different but here we are.” He forces out a laugh before glancing at you and offering a hand. You notice how his smile doesn’t seem to reach his eyes. “We're still the bestest of friends even without the mark, right?”
Hesitantly, you took it.
The moment your fingers wrapped around his Hoseok immediately takes his hand back in favor of holding the brake between you both.
You try to not let his aversion to touch affect you. It was understandable why he isn’t touching you as he always had. New soulbonds are fickle, there’s been multiple reports where people are rushed into ER after brushing their hands against strangers and had been in excruciating pain from soulbond strain.
Their new bodies had thought they were denying destiny and had punished them. It was ridiculous.
But for him to completely retreat to himself, visibly putting up a tall wall between you both is a different kind of pain. For Hoseok, someone who has never had to restrain himself from holding your hands or hugging you whenever he's excited, to step back hurts you more than you thought it would.
“Noona, we’re here.”
As you left the car, you pondered on what to say to him. What could you even tell him?
Do you even say you're sorry he's not one of your soulmates or would that sound mocking?
Should you say that you had wished once that he becomes tethered to you or would that be rubbing salt on the wound?
But before you could even turn around and say your goodbyes, the moment the door was closed, Hoseok drove off.
Waking up was dreadful.
It felt more exhausting and daring than it had yesterday when you were going to your third date with Guwon. Sleeping was difficult, you could feel Yoongi touch the string from miles away, eyes flying open whenever you felt the thread become tangible and gently glow in the darkness of your room.
It wasn't his soul-link alone that disturbed you, Namjoon’s heartbeat constantly changed rhythm although it was faint enough to blend into the background with the rumble of the air conditioner. From the nervous gallops to the calmer but deeper thuds whenever he seems to drown himself in his own thoughts.
You had research about your soul links when you grew restless in your bed, obsessed over the fact there's little to no information on your and Jimin's mark, trying to ignore the concerned messages from your mother and sister. They were asking about Guwon and why you decided to end things. You know that you should explain, you at least owe your mother the reason why you had decided to stop seeing the lawyer but you couldn't.
After weeks of her constant questioning and spamming links of wedding organizers and dressmakers, you couldn't find the courage to face your mother.
Not that it matters anymore though, not after last night.
Would you send her to an early grave once you tell her the news? How do you even break the news to your parents? Hi mom, I'm sorry I've been ignoring you yesterday. Yes, I stopped seeing Guwon but hey, I found you five new son-in-laws and they happen to be the members of the world's biggest boyband so don't be mad yeah?
She might just make true to her threat of hanging you upside down on a sack on your porch back in the province.
The same thought had led you to realizing how close you were to being engaged with Guwon in Jeju only to find out the next day who your soulmates were.
When you trudged to the bathroom, exhaustion clung and weighed your bones but you excused it to your shitty sleep.
Not once has any of the boys reached out to you the whole night, the silence from Seokjin carving a hollowness in your chest. You know that they're busy handling the grunt and paperworks due today but to have not a single text in the groupchat made dread crawl up within you.
So when the door rang a quarter to nine, you jumped.
The door opens and Namjoon steps into your living room with Seokjin following closely behind him, expression guarded and eyes averted while the former approaches you. Both their eyes are swollen, no doubt from a sleepless night except Seokjin's looks far puffier than the other.
“Hi noona,” Namjoon began, voice soft as ever as he approached you to wrap his arms around you and you let him. “Hyung’s here with me to drive you to the DFR, the others went first since we decided that it's better if you're not lumped up with all your soulmates in one small space so it's just us three today.”
“Have you eaten?” Seokjin says, unmoving from where he stands a step away from the door, guarded and stiff, as if trying to meld himself into the wood.
His voice is hoarse and he looked more worn than you've ever seen him yet he managed to sound soft and put on the smallest of smiles. Your heart twinges.
“I haven't, you guys didn't tell me when we were going to have the bond registered.”
Namjoon sheepishly scratches the back of his head. “Sorry about that. We got busy discussing how we'll be moving forward, the company has already cleared out the office and as Hobi-hyung might've told you, they're doing everything they can to keep this under wraps for now.”
“There’s unfortunately no time for take-outs due to the time crunch, I doubt you guys will be out by twelve but I think we can all go for a good, filling lunch.”
“Jinnie, are you okay?”
The words slipped out of your lips before you could realize it had. His eyes widened for a fracture, taken aback before a sad smile stretched his lips.
“I will be, don't worry.”
Namjoon claps his hands abruptly, cutting through the air as he forces out a grin. “Alright, let's be on our way.”
“What about the family dinners?” You pushed on.
“We'll tell them the truth. I can't exactly bring you to family dinners as my fake girlfriend anymore now, can I?”
What started as Jin needing your help in stopping vulture-like aunties trying to introduce their daughters to him, grew far more serious when Mrs. Kim began to invite you annually to their family reunion dinners and had begun sending you the occasional gift boxes from her trips abroad. You tried giving them to Jin when the first box came but he insisted you keep them anyway. It made you feel guilty for tricking his family, especially his mother, but Jin needed your help in warding off the bad energy .
“We told hyung that once the bond gets stable next year, you can continue attending them.” Namjoon adds.
“Obviously I denied, what a stupid idea.” Seokjin immediately responds with a scoff and Namjoon rolls his eyes. “Why are you even paired with them when they disregard your safety like this? Really, why would you guys even suggest that?”
Namjoon turns to him with a look that seems to ask ‘do you really want me to answer that?’ and Seokjin pursed his lips in a straight line. You laughed.
It was a relief to see that nothing has changed within their dynamics. You had feared the day everyone would turn against each other because of you. It had made you wary of how much time you spend with a member one on one, scared the others would think of it as picking favorites.
To see Seokjin, the one you have no doubt been more devastated than Hoseok, be making light hearted jokes about the soulmarks lifted off a huge weight from your shoulders.
“I hope auntie won't take it to heart. You were a nice boyfriend but you kept nagging me to pay a nonsense debt.”
“You still have a balance to settle with me, don't forget that,” He jokes. “But seriously, mom would be sad, she likes you better than me.”
Namjoon's phone pings, the sound silencing you both. With a hissed apology, he turned his attention to the device and read the notification on his lock screen before turning to you.
“We need to get going soon. Hobi hyung said Yoongi hyung and Jimin just got called up.”
“Wait, I haven't showered yet! You guys didn't even warn me!”
But as you move to run back to your room, Namjoon stops you with a hand on your shoulder.
“It's fine, noona.”
“It's not like we haven't seen you with unwashed hair for two days straight.”
“Hey that was one time!” You exclaimed, indignant.
“What was the longest day, hyung?” Namjoon clicks his fingers, a small teasing grin tugging his lips.
“Three days I think?”
“I thought it was a week?”
“So that's why she looked so greasy.”
Their laughter when you slapped both their arms twinkled in your ears. The sound warming your chest but also grating your gears at the same time.
Fresher than you had been earlier, you all arrive at the DFA an hour later. Spending thirty preparing, another half traveling to the heart of Seoul.
There's already a few bodyguards dressed in civilian wear lingering outside the office. Mr. Lee approached the car once the three of you began to step out before ushering all of you inside the building with a few other guards.
Save for the receptionists on the other side of the counter placed in the dead middle of the room, the lobby was empty. Sejin comes out from the wide open arch on the right, a man dressed in neatly ironed and a tailored black suit following behind him.
“Let's all move to where the rest are. We couldn't rent the building for the whole day so they’ll be opening to the general public soon but we were allowed to have one floor to ourselves.”
None of you objects and followed him to the elevator and to the second floor where you were immediately greeted by Taehyung, Hoseok and Jungkook sitting on the blue plastic seats clustered by both sides of the walls.
When the metal doors parts open, their heads turn and immediately, Taehyung stands and runs up to you with arms wide.
Namjoon and Seokjin weren't able to react fast enough. The moment Taehyung wrapped himself around you, a powerful wave of bliss crashed over you and your legs gave out. They all screamed your name as you fell but they were muffled, hands grabbed onto whatever they could in the haste of catching you.
In the bleariness of your vision, you could make out Taehyung narrowly avoiding crumpling onto the floor when someone caught him by the waist.
“...That was so stupid of you…”
“...Why…Taehyung?...”
“Noona?”
The haze clears and you find yourself being carried by Seokjin into the nearest doctor’s office. You hear the door open before Yoongi’s exasperated but concerned voice follows.
“What the hell happened now?”
“Taehyung forgot they're soulmates and hugged her.”
“Fuckin—Just get her inside.”
“Noona, I’m so sorry!”
Seokjin lets you down on a soft cushioned armchair and you find yourself staring back at a bespectacled woman with hair so straight you wonder how Yoongi didn't feel exorcized at the sight of it.
She didn't waste any time and she rose from her seat to inject something in your arm.
“What a wild introduction this is. First you come in with five soulmates, a Nexus group and one of them having Healing Touch, and as if that's not intriguing enough, you faint after a touch from Love Prints! So, very interesting!”
She returns to her seat as the haze ebbs away from your vision with the glowing purple paint on your torso.
“I guess it's true that all soul specialists are… enthusiastic .”
“Only on the right things, don't worry we don't bite.”
There's almost a manic look in her eyes as she stares at you with a fascination only seen in a mad geologist who had found a new and infinitely curious piece of history in the dirt. Seokjin pats your shoulders, squeezing it assuringly for the last time before he disappears out the door.
“So, how's this gonna go?”
Doctor Gwak Jihye was a woman with flat light brown hair almost the same height as you. There's narrow rectangle glasses sitting neatly on the bridge of her nose and a notable beauty mark placed on the apple of her right cheekbones. Black vine-like tattoos peaked out of her cream turtleneck, a soulmark you guessed once you saw the ring on her finger.
The band is as dark as the night yet gleaned like stars under the bright light of the room with three deep blue sapphires engraved on the front. A ring made from soul metal created and only used by the tethered.
She wore the standard white coat of every doctor you’ve ever met with the exception of the detailed pin of two white strings knotted together inside a heart and a red cross placed in the middle of it all.
“We'll do the basic health checks, the measurements and all the like, nothing too difficult. Then we educate you on every soulmark you have. You are aware of what you have with the five of them, correct?”
She rapid fires and you're left agape, mouth closing and open as your brain catches up. The doctor raised an eyebrow and you nod. With that, she motions to the scales behind you as she stands. You followed the woman to the stadiometer placed next to the door.
Once she was done taking your measurements down, you both returned to her desk where she asked you a few questions about your allergies and recent medical history. It was an easy procedure, almost boring. The ever so present exhaustion is still weighing your bones, you yawned. Staying awake felt like a challenge and you don't doubt she had noticed this when she placed down her board to open her drawer.
“You are feeling more exhausted than before, am I correct in assuming this?”
“Yes…?”
She hummed when she found what she was looking for and placed the thick white medicine bottle in front of you.
“This should help your body get used to the bonds whenever you touch Jimin or Taehyung. The exhaustion is normal since you live far from them but once you move in and are surrounded by your soulmates, you should feel more energized.”
Amoneuron , it reads on the label. Curious, you twist the lid open to see what might just be a hundred of blush pink colored round pills.
“With that out of the way, from what I've heard from Yoongi, you've researched every soulmark there is at one point in your life but I doubt that you don't have any questions,” She fished out the yellow folder under her board and opened it, not knowing how surprised you are to hear Yoongi’s involvement. “Anything you'd like to know about?”
Your mind takes you back to the empty search and countless ‘Did you mean…?’ questions on every result. Jimin and your marks never yielded any results, none in Naver and none in Google.
You tried finding it in your books but none of them were ever close to the touch activated golden swirls and the feeling of being rejuvenated.
“I tried researching what could be Jimin and I’s soulmark but I couldn't find one, is it that rare of a mark?”
She nods. “ Healing touch , there's so little information of that type of mark since the last recorded case can be traced back to 1934.”
Your eyes widen, surprised by how rare of a mark you share with Jimin.
“Which meant if there were soul-link related sickness between you, I fear that we won't be much of help as we don't know much about Healing Touch other than mates who has it doesn't get hungry, thirsty nor need much sleep if they interacted enough,” She gauges your reaction, when she saw your confusion she continues. “By interacting enough, I don't mean hugs or hand holding, I mean kisses and sex.”
You began to cough violently, choking on your saliva at her bluntness, cheeks burning bright but she ignored you and continued.
“Hand holding and hugs can only guarantee better stamina and endurance, even being close enough can make the other have a bottomless energy. As this concerns a highly valued individual, our team is already attempting to acquire more information about Healing Touch but I don’t have an estimated time on when we’ll be ready to share our findings, please understand that we are also surprised by this mark’s sudden revival.” She smiled. “Anything else you'd like to ask?”
“Are Taehyung and Jimin's marks somehow similar? I remember feeling… rejuvenated whenever the both of them touched me but then got overstimulated.”
Her eyebrows rose.
“No, Taehyung’s touch shouldn’t affect you outside of the first touch nor should you be suffering from soulbond hyperactivity from both of them. When Seokjin had carried you in, what exactly happened beforehand?”
“When Taehyung hugged me again not too long ago, we experienced soulbond hyperactivity.”
“Huh.” Was all she replied with, hand scribbling furiously on her notes. You had the urge to sit up a little straight and take a peak at what she’s writing down so passionately but decided against it, fearing what you might learn from it.
“Any guesses on what could have caused this?”
“It's hard to say much for now since Healing Touch is a very rare mark. But I can hazard a guess and say that due to their similar nature being touch-activated marks and Healing Touch being as powerful as it is, it had influenced Love Print somehow.”
If her words were anything to go by, If Jimin and your soulmark does greatly affect both your livelihoods by practically rendering you both immortals by eliminating the need for food, sleep, and water as long as the needed affection level is met; not to mention, as long as the both of you are close enough, exhaustion is nothing but a word.
And if Taehyung’s soulmark has evolved due to Healing Touch, then wouldn’t the benefits, at least the bare bones of them, extend to him as well?
You already sense the building headache you’re about to experience in the future with three—including Jungkook whose energy is already a thousand times more of a kid in a toy store—bouncy men with the energy of a toddler in a sugar rush. In advance, you began to pray internally for Namjoon, Sejin, and Seokjin’s sanity.
“It seems that I am due to share notes with the doctor who had interviewed Jimin,” She says as she slams close the cover of her journal with a smile. “This could lead to a breakthrough in the future, with both of your permissions, we would like to study your soulmark more intimately.”
“I wouldn’t be opposed to it but my soulmate might not share the sentiment. The company as well.”
“Your soulmarks could very well lead up to the discovery of the cure to an incurable disease, I doubt he would decline such a possibility.”
You don’t doubt the possibility of your soulmark being the answer to the long time issue of something as fatal as cancer or dementia but the prospect of being examined, had made you feel uncomfortable. To be under intense scrutiny and possibly put under a specific diet to tailor to their needs—especially when Jimin had only recently stopped caring about his body image—had made you more unwilling to participate.
You’d spare a few vials of blood since your bond can regenerate it back in record time but a prolonged trial is definitely a no.
“Why did it manifest now? After all those years, why now?” You ask abruptly, trying to change the subject. You hoped she would take the bait and luckily, she did with a defeated sigh.
The answer to your question is already solved, it was simple.
“As you know, once we hit the age of 16, the chances of meeting our soulmates goes up to 10% and will gain the same amount the next year will continue on till it hits a hundred on the 26th and the chances of manifesting a mark stops on the 27th,” You nod, feigning ignorance and she continues. “The Nexus connection had to wait for Jungkook to show which had put yours and the rest to a state of dormancy. So when he turned 21, with half a hundred chance, he finally got a mark and here we are.”
You stand and bow, not wanting to leave any free millisecond where she could try continuing to pressure you into agreeing into their research.
“Thank you so much for your insight, Dr. Gwak.”
She looked incredulous and surprised by your sudden actions before returning the gesture.
“It’s a pleasure to be able to foresee a unique connection such as yours, Ms. Y/n. I hope you all the best.”
With that, you leave the room in a haste and let out the biggest exhale once the door behind you closes.
You hear the soft murmurs of voice just around the corner where you guessed you’ll find everyone save for Namjoon who must’ve been called after you had been carried in by Seokjin. But when one door closes, another opens. There’s still a few things you’re due today, a talk with the inner circle of the company, talking with the legal team to figure out who else can know the connection outside of your Nexus, and how you’ll be continuing working as their make-up artist.
There’s a tug down the thread and you look down at your pinkie to see the line turn tangible and vibrant before a wave of concern floods your system.
Tentatively, you twirled the string around your finger and the headache fades. You watch as it glows brighter, livelier with both hosts touching it before tugging it back twice. Instantly, Yoongi responds with another. You expected the string to dim, for him to let go but it remained vibrant under both of your touch.
The dull ache at the back of your head returns.
“Are you the lady with the Healing Touch soulmark?”
You jumped back to see an old woman, around the age of sixty, peering up at you with a gentle smile playing on her lips. She dons the same white coat Dr. Gwak wears the same pin of a soul specialist on the lapel and her name tag displayed on her breast pocket.
Shin Sun-young , it reads.
“In my years of being a specialist, I've never seen so many souls connected to one so I'm sorry if I'm a bit much, I'm very curious how it must feel. Having one is already overwhelming for me, I can’t imagine how you’re feeling now.”
“Yeah it's a bit much sometimes… I had three of them touch me all at the same time and I almost fainted. I don't know how I can deal with it.”
“We have some medicines for that but I’m sure you already know that and have been prescribed right. It’ll dull up your senses till the first year then you can stop taking it.”
She pats your back as you both walk off the sides and you find your soulmates sitting obediently down the hall. Jimin was lying on one cluster of seats in front of the others with an arm over his eyes and the other pinched into a fist on top of his stomach while the rest of the boys squeezed together into the five seats on the opposite wall.
You notice the missing presence of their eldest but shrugged it off, guessing that he must've wandered off to find the bathroom or a vending machine.
“I hope it goes well for you seven, I'm sure they'll treat you so well.”
Your head snaps to her. “Seven?”
“Oh? Am I wrong? I thought all of those boys are tethered to you. Forgive this old soul.”
A suspicious voice told you that she had intentionally guessed wrong to fish for information but you tampered it down, giving the curious woman the benefit of a doubt. Soul specialists have the reputation of being knowledge-driven crazy people with barely any other qualifying trait other than their unusual obsession with soulmates after all and this lady might just be one of the people that fits the bill.
“Hoseok and Jin, their eldest who has gone somewhere, aren't tethered to me. There's no sign of any marks manifesting and we just assumed the worst.”
You hated how you sounded so dejected. You must’ve sounded so greedy to the lady for wanting to have your seven friends to be yours, as if you even deserve Seokjin’s unfaltering love.
She hums. “Are you sure about that?”
“What do you mean?” You ask with an eyebrow raised.
“Dear, everything in the world is advanced now. They could have their blood tested to see if there's a possibility that they're also tethered to you.”
You were reminded of the times where you began to dread your birthdays when you should've been celebrating, the desperation before the abrupt descend of defeat on your birthday this year when you finally realize that you weren't
“How is that possible? Why now? We've had years of technological evolution but something like that only appears now? Where was this when I wanted to find out if I was—”
She sighs and puts a hand on your shoulder, effectively shutting you up. “Soulmates are spiritual deary, past technology and brains of yesterdays had difficulty in figuring out the hows and why it works. But now, I can assure you that we have finally found a way to find if you're really untethered or not.”
“Tha-that’s a thing?”
You turned around to find Seokjin on the opposite hall, carrying what seems to be a hundred snacks with two hands, surprise contorting his face. Crossing the distance in under two steps, he stared at the lady with hopeful eyes.
“Where can I have myself checked?”
The way his voice dripped with hope, with desperation of a man who had lost his way and finally found a chance of redemption, a new salvation to pour his attention to. Hearing it made your chest clench. But there was no testimony for their new found tech, there's no telling if they're actually telling the truth.
As much as you are curious as to what the result could be, you couldn't have Seokjin join the test all hopeful only to fall into a deeper hole if he found out that he's actually untethered.
Your heart won't be able to handle the absolute devastation that would follow.
“Jinnie—”
“You boys are in luck, we just had the machine set up last night and we’re looking for—”
“I’ll do it. Me and someone else.”
As they began to talk about the technicalities of using the machine and partaking in their research, you found yourself standing there in shock.
You already suspected Hoseok also shared the same sentiment Jin held but to hear him indirectly confirm them had your heart bottoming to the soles of your feet. The guilt that used to only stem from Jin and Taehyung's confession came back to you like a blow to the head.
Jin then briskly walked away, you followed to see him approach an increasingly concerned Hoseok who watched his hyung march up to him with an indistinguishable fire in his eyes.
“Hoba, I found a way.”
He furrowed his eyebrows. “Found a way… to what exactly?”
“They have the technology to figure out if we're actually untethered or not.”
Everyone's eyes widened. Jimin had woken up from his nap and turned his head to his hyungs, shocked by what he had heard. Taehyung's jaw hung open, looking around in bewilderment before he stood to walk around the rest of the boys and into the stunned Hoseok on the other side of the seats to engulf him in a hug.
Even Manager Sejin who has been talking to the lawyer he brought with him had turned to listen to the conversation.
“H-Hyung—”
“I've already talked to the doctor who will be overseeing our examination and all they ask of us is our blood then the resul—”
“No.”
Seokjin’s shine dims with the atmosphere as his smile falls. Taehyung pulls away, more astounded than he was before as he stares at him in disbelief.
“Hyung?”
“Wh-what do you mean?” Seokjin stammers out in disbelief.
“What if it came out as negative still? Hyung, I've already accepted my status. I-I don't want to raise my hopes up only to come down to the same result.”
“It doesn't hurt to try Hoba,” Seokjin said softer this time as he placed a hand on his shoulder. “Try with me, please . If it's negative at least we can lament together.”
Hoseok agreed not too long after, unable to say no to his hyung, not when he's begging and pleading. Seokjin led him back to the soul specialist to have their blood taken. You had waited for them next to Yoongi on the seat Hoseok had occupied earlier. It's only 10am at that point yet your energy tank is drier than the sahara and non-existent as a stress-free day for you. When the two returned, you were slumped down on Yoongi's shoulder half asleep.
The exhausting day didn't end there.
After your soulmarks were registered, you all went to BigHit for a meeting and you thanked the high heavens no one from your department had seen you enter the conference room with the boys and a lawyer.
Minhyuk had asked you why there'll be a company party at dinner but no birthday boy will be showing up. You lied and told him that Jungkook’s going back to Busan to celebrate his birthday with his family. Jihye had also questioned your absence and you had apologized to her, knowing how often you've been going for leaves these past few weeks.
She says it's fine but you still feel bad anyways.
The meeting was short yet it felt like centuries has passed until you were freed. Just a couple of rules being laid like you being unable to handle Jimin and Taehyung anymore, the living situation where you'd be moved to the Bangtan dorms, and who else would know about the connections between you and the boys—they had approved letting your three friends know once you reasoned that they'll be able to save you once people began to question your aversion to touching Jimin and Taehyung in the future.
By the time you had trudge into your room, you were beyond the word exhaustion. Brain far too fogged up you to pick up on the blaring red lights in your mind as the world swirled around you and you fell face first into your bed.
You chalked it up to your sleepless night and the emotional stress you've gone through these past few days so imagine your shock when you wake up and find yourself in a sterile and white room whose ceiling lights burned your eyes the moment they opened again.
It was so bright and so white, you remember passing out before you came here and all you could feel now was bliss, as if the heavy baggage you've collected from last week and last night had been lifted off your form.
As if you were in heaven .
“G-God?”
“No, it's Min Yoongi. Open your eyes, brat.”
The haze clears at his gruff voice and you began to hear the stable beeping echoing in the hollow room. There's a heavy weight wounded loosely around your waist as well on your legs, turning your head, you were faced with the peaceful but almost colorless face of Jimin, his usually plush pink lips now pale and chaffed as his body trembled next to you; you were shaking too.
Turning to Yoongi to ask him what happened, you find your hand entangled with his. His impassive face now laced with concern and there were dark bags hanging under his eyes as if he hadn't been sleeping for a while.
“What the fuck happened?”
TAGLIST: @wildestdreamsblog @canarystwin @prettywheenicry @jmnscutie @sassy-snassy @misuguru @11thenightwemet11 @yoongibaybee @rinkud @bri602 @igetcarriedawaywithyou @marvel-potter-1d-korea @comingupwithacoolnameishard @sooha-neul @juju-227592 @coffeewanderer
#bts x reader#bts x reader poly#bts x fem!reader#bts x y/n#bts x you#kim namjoon x reader#kim seokjin x reader#min yoongi x reader#jung hoseok x reader#park jimin x reader#kim taehyung x reader#jeon jungkook x reader#soulmate au#namjoon x reader#seokjin x reader#yoongi x reader#hoseok x reader#jimin x reader#taehyung x reader#jungkook x reader
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With a hyper s/o
Pairing: Ot8 skz × Gn!reader (individually)
Genre: fluff, headcanons
Request: hihi! i loved your skz with a quiet s/o! is it okay if i request skz with a extroverted and loud s/o? thank you!
Warnings: not proofread
A/n: stray kids comeback soon!! So excited what | fundraiser
Bang Chan
Honestly he gets a little bit worried every time you start to jump and run around lmao, but it's just his protective side showing out. He'd do everything to keep the smile on your face. The boys also are glad you are in his life, as since you came along he seems more carefree, like he can relax a bit more. Maybe you being so alive made him decide to live more as well.
Lee Know
Absolute chaos. When he is on those "I'll just start screaming and let's see what happens" moments, you both become unstoppable. And if you're up to joining in his crazy ideas, he might as well just have found the love of his life. But when he's on his calmer moments, he loves to just hear you talk about anything or just admire you. He finds you so endearing and loveable.
Changbin
I feel like you have scared him quite a few times by being loud but then he's being louder and you just click so well lmao. The boys love him, love you and love you both as a couple but they'd be rolling their eyes whenever you two got together😭 I feel like talking to him would be so easy too. Conversation just comes and goes so normally, you wouldn't even have to try.
Hyunjin
Honestly, he just loves how everything about you seems so bright. He can swear he sees colours more vivid because of you and your little habits. It's almost impossible for him to not smile along your antics and drama. Might even try to keep up with your hype sometimes (mostly fails but he doesn't mind that much, he just likes to see you be his sunshine).
Han
Yes he's an introvert but have you seen this man?? He's ready to set fire to everything most of the time. So this is kinda absolute chaos pt2. Such a good duo, you both share the same braincell. But when the situation calls for it, you are his vitamin and charger. And if you're the dramatic type as well, he's all in for that.
Felix
If Han is his sunshine twin you're his sunshine soulmate. Honestly, the room just brightens up the moment you two walk in. And people can always figure out where you both are just by following the sound of your laugh 😭 that's genuinely cute.
Seungmin
Teases you a little bit when it comes to you being extra hyper and happy about everything, but it's all in good fun. He actually finds it rather cute. It also gives me huge "If you dance I'll dance, if you don't I'll dance anyways" vibes (please someone understand what I mean). Most of the times he's wondering how you have such a big social battery tho lmao.
I.N
Honestly he loves to hear you yap. You always come up with the most random things to say, he never knows what to expect. And even though he doesn't say much back, you always know that he's listening. And it's even kinda cute because when he's only with the boys he'll randomly talk about what you said earlier that day. "Did you know you can hear a blue whale's heartbeat from two miles away?"
Masterlist | you'll probably like: with a quiet s/o
Thank you for reading <3
Taglist (open): @yuyubeans @dandelions-143 @sleepyleeji
Credits for images 1 2 and 3
Dividers by @isisjupiter
#celi headcanons#stray kids#skz fluff#stray kids fluff#skz#stray kids soft hours#stray kids soft thoughts#skz x reader#skz x you#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#stray kids headcanons#stray kids fanfic#bang chan#bang chan fluff#lee know#lee know fluff#changbin#changbin fluff#hyunjin#hyunjin fluff#han#han fluff#felix#felix fluff#seungmin#seungmin fluff#i.n#i.n fluff#jeongin
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Please Please Please
Poly! Dark! 141 x Reader
TW: Dark Themes, Spicy Themes, Possessive Behaviour, Obsessive Behaviour, Violence, Blood, Death
Description, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
Main Masterlist | CoD Masterlist
Note: Hey, I'm back to my usual postings!
For a moment, you swore that you could hear frantic voices from the back of your subconscious. You swore that those voices sounded a lot like your teammates in the 141.
But they couldn't be them. Not with the way they sounded so distraught, begging and crying for your life. You almost felt flattered.
"Lieutenant. Bullet. Birdie. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I haven't been a good sargeant to you, a good friend and fuck- I've been a horrible person overall. Please. Let me correct my wrongs and stay alive."
"You're going to be alright, Bullet. I swear on it. You're not leaving us anytime soon, that's a promise."
"Don't die on us, Bullet."
"Fuck- lovie, I'm so fucking sorry. I shouldn't have lost focus on the field. Please. Look, you can shoot me again in the throat if it'll make you feel better, just- make sure you'll make it out alive to do it, yeah?"
You laughed in the back of your mind. The last voice reminded you of your scottish sargeant, what a johnny thing to say.
"What a Bullet thing to do. Laughing even on the brink of desth."
You blinked at the new but familiar voice. "Cori?" Your old sargeant.
"I must be in hell if I'm seeing you." You joked and the sargeant, kicked at your head as you were lying on the ground.
Sitting up, you noticed that you were in a blank void. A white space with nothing but you and your sargeant, your old friend.
"Believe it or not, Cap and I made it heaven actually. Don't know how we were able to sneak in but surprise." Cori joked and you smiled softly at how easily you two eased into banter despite the long years.
"What are you doing joining us so soon by the way?" Cori crouched down, reaching out to brush a stray hair from your face. "Cap's gonna be angry if she hears about this."
You winced almost, "Can't you keep this a secret?" you pleaded. Soulmate or not- she'll find a way to kill you a second time if she finds out that you die so early. She always rained down hell whenever you were too reckless on certain missions.
"I don't know how you could keep your death a secret to another dead person, bullet. You're bound to meet sooner or later." Cori snickered.
"Ah fuck." You crossed your arms, preparing to face the wrath of your Captain. Only to find that your body was currently blinking, phasing in and out oddly. "What?"
"Oh." Cori looked surprised but pleased nonetheless. "Looks like you won't have to worry about facing Cap's wrath." He chuckles.
"They're really fighting to bring you back yknow." You didn't know who Cori was referring to. Who they are?
"Think your duty as Lieutenant is still far from over, Bullet." Cori pats your shoulder before you completely phased away from him.
The warmth on your shoulder was comforting even for a moment.
The panic was quick to run through their veins once they saw you go limp. They were assured you were not yet dead when they picked up a faint heartbeat.
A million thoughts ran through their heads as they rushed you to evac. Ghost yelling at Nik once they took their positions inside the helicopter. Price immediately contacting Laswell to prepare all the medics for your arrival. Soap holding onto one hand while Gaz held onto the other, both men pleading and talking to your unconscious form.
They usually wouldn't bother with your existence. They tolerated you as a teammate but refused to acknowledge you properly as their Lieutenant.
The 141 was a close pack, with loyalties that ran as deep as the ocean. So when they first met you, your bullet making a shot through Soap's throat. They were quick to build a resentment against you, quick to hold onto a grudge.
There were times where they felt warmth or awe at your small acts for them. With your little cooked meals, your aromatic teas, and your short notes. There were also scenarios where'd you'd stitch Ghost's balaclava when it rips or you'd patch Gaz up so gently when you're out in the field.
It was flattering to them but they always brushed off the butterflies, they'd shrug of the colorful fireworks. Refusing to acknowledge that they actually liked you because of a stupid grudge that you tried hard to make up for.
Now that stupid grudge might actually make them lose you. That drove them into a spiral- knowing that they might lose you and they haven't even done shit to make up for their mistakes.
"They're going to be fine. Bullet's strong. One of the damn best Lieutenants that I know." Gaz mumbled. He didn't know who he was trying to convince- Soap, him or maybe both of them.
"Please, Please. Make it out alive, birdie. Please."
#Erindrinkstea#COD#Call of Duty#Task Force 141#Call of Duty x Reader#Task Force 141 x Reader#Poly 141 x Reader#simon ghost riley#john price#john soap mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#Dark 141
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i am physically, mentally unable to get past the fact that sirius and james are soulmates. it doesn't matter how you view their relationship. AT ALL. they'll always be james and sirius. you can't separate them hell, harry named his SON james sirius potter. tell me, look me in my bloodshot, dark circled eyes that prongsfoot aren't meant to find each other in every life time. the world can be burning to smithereens around them but they would ALWAYS look for each other. sirius risked his life just be with james's son. and you know what his last words to him were, the boy who lived ? OF COURSE YOU FUCKING DO YOU ARE HAUNTED ETERNALLY WITH THE KNOWLEDGE THAT JAMES POTTER AND SIRIUS BLACK'S SOULS ARE ENTWINED IN THE VERY FRAMEWORK OF THE UNIVERSE, THEIR BINARY IS THE PATTERN OF EACH OTHER'S HEARTBEATS, YOU CAN BLIND THEM, TAKE AWAY THEIR HEARING, YOU CAN BLAST THEIR MEMORIES AND SABOTAGE EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM ALL YOU WANT BUT YOU NEVER SAW ONE WITHOUT THE OTHER AND IT WILL REMAIN THAT WAY UNTIL THE UNIVERSE KILLS ITSELF
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death by a thousand cuts !
summary. having been cursed to be immortal, you are destined to lose your soulmate horribly every different realm you take ... can you stop it just this time?
warnings / includes . terrible fucking angst, heavy themes of death, hint of an suicide attempt, love
somebody once said that when the rain pours down upon oneself, that's the way to feel the most alive. but what's the use of it when you don't deserve to be such? the rain isn't there for you, it's for the plants that have been starving on the streets, just like the ones he norouished in his garden back in the renaissance.
but that's the thing about humans and gods, they are selfish foolish creatures who lack empathy for anyone but themselves, they shall lie and betray and curse, yet never acknowledge the pain they cause. take take take. never him though, him and his tiny dimples that he showed just for you, perhaps they were the reason his flowers stayed alive for so long. human fucking sunlight, he was.
it used to warm you, like a heavy blanket on a cold winter day, like the comforting tea your mother brews when you were sick as a child. yet it fades once more, is replaced by a freezing like feeling, it's the dark rain dampening your clothes, mostly. and the heavy dog tags around your neck, made of cold metal.
they used to ground you, now it's just a constant reminder of everything that could've been, far far gone.
you were just a nurse back then, nothing more than a nameless face among a sea of wounded men. when the man you loved — a soldier who swore he would come back to you — finally staggered into that field hospital, bleeding and broken, there was nothing in the world that could save him. not your desperate hands, not the morphine you tried to push through his veins, nothing.
you remember the look in his eyes before it was over; familiar, loving, and yet filled with an unspoken apology. he was sorry. he was sorry for dying, repeating the cycle you warned him about. and all you could do was clutch onto him, whisper into his damp skin, prayers to him and to the gods above, to keep jungkook. just this once, just a single time.
they never listened.
you clutch onto the wet railing of the bridge, like you held onto his arm back then, craddled his face, muttered utter nonsense into the thin air, that you knew deep down he wouldn't even hear anymore. crazy what death does to people.
the rain beats against your skin, colder now, harsher. your fingers ache with the effort of holding onto the railing, your eyes close, remembering the last time you saw him.
he kissed you then, soft, as though the world around didn’t matter. and you kissed him back, tasting the salt of his tears on your lips. ‘i’m sorry,’ he whispered, and you responded quietly that he should stop apologizing all the time, that it wasn't his fault. it never was.
damned be jungkook and his endless empathy and love, in every universe.
your hand slides up to your neck, fingers brushing against your cold skin, moving to your chest, the rapid heartbeat inside. it just wasn't fair.
you hear footsteps behind you, soft, barerly audible within the sound of pouring rain, yet you don't turn around. you can't, you can't turn around to face the face that was equally as cursed as your own, that you've hurt countless times just by being you. but most of all, you were scared.
"hey," his voice is low, gentle, but there’s a tremor to it — a hesitation that speaks volumes, maybe jungkook was scared you'd jump of the bridge the way you were clutching onto the railing, that was likely. god, such a jungkook thing to do, try to prevent a complete stranger from committing. you feel incredibly numb, keep looking forward.
“you’re not alone,” he says quietly, like it’s the most natural thing in the world to say. like it’s the truth, even though you knew it wasn't, and he was the reason for it.
he steps one step closer, and you can feel a hand on your back, warm just like centuries ago. your own hand comes to cover your eyes, to him it might seem like you don't want him to see that you cried or rather, are currently crying. when in reality, you were to scared to meet his eyes.
"please leave-" you barerly press out, gaze settling on the black water below, anywhere just not behind you.
"i can't do that."
"you don't understand," you screech a bit louder, like raising your voice would somehow prevent him, safe him — from loving you again.
"i understand more then you know."
“you don't even know me, go away.” the yelled words are harsh, yet another futile attempt to push him away; the tenderness in his voice, the warmth of his hand, the ache in your chest that only he seems to cause.
instead of leaving, you feel his other hand on your wrist, gentle, like he’s afraid you’ll shatter under his touch, turning you around softly.
and you've never been more terrified.
#bts fic#bts x reader#jungkook#bangtan fic#bangtan x reader#jungkook imagine#jungkook fic#bangtan x you#jeon jungkook x reader#bangtan fluff#bangtan angst#bts angst#bts x you#bts fanfic#bts fanfiction#jungkook angst#jungkook x y/n#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#bts x y/n#bts x fem!reader#bts fluff#jungkook fanfic#jeon jungkook
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Real Love, Baby | Joel Miller
pairing: husband!joel miller x wife!reader
rating: none
warnings: no outbreak, lots of fluff, and some good ol’ joel miller lovin’ and a few kisses. no use of y/n.
word count: 904
synopsis: joel has a bad day at work, but seeing you dancing in the kitchen makes it all better.
a/n: based on the song real love baby by father john misty
divider by @saradika-graphics
Joel deeply sighed as he parked his truck in the driveway. He closed his eyes for a few beats, pinching the bridge of his nose as his bad mood kept festering in his chest, daring to settle into his aching bones.
He had a terrible day at work. Though, terrible doesn’t even do the day justice. He knew you were going to ask about his day, which was routine now, but he truly didn’t want to talk about his day from hell.
He knew seeing you and Sarah would make it all better, though.
He groaned as he hopped out his truck, stretching his sore limbs before grabbing his toolbox and heading for the door.
When he opened it, the aroma of dinner flooded his senses and a song playing mid-level from the vinyl player wafted from the kitchen. He set his tools down by the front door, toeing off his work boots before making his way to the kitchen.
He paused when he saw you, totally enamored as you swayed your hips and sang along to the song.
“I’m in love, I’m alive, I belong to the stars in the sky,” You sing unashamedly, never noticing the watchful eye of your husband. You stir the pot of what seemed to be noodles a few times before checking on the sauce cooking next to it, humming to the song as you swayed your hips some more.
The horrible day Joel’s had rolls off of the weight of his chest and shoulders, dissipating into thin air as he leans on the wall, crossing his arms. A smile curls onto his lips, replacing the frown that’d seemed indefinite the whole day.
His heart bloomed with warmth as you twirled, eyes closed, before focusing on dinner again. You opened the oven to take out the Texas toast, and Joel quietly hummed to himself as he realized what you made for dinner.
“I want real love baby, oh don’t leave me waiting, I’ve got real love maybe, wait until you taste me,” You sang again, and he pushed himself off of the wall to make his way toward you, finally making his presence known.
His hands settled on your hips and you gasped, laughing as you set a hand over your rapidly beating heart.
“Scared me, baby.” You huff, smiling at the handsome man as you spun around in his grip.
“Don’t stop dancin’ n’ singin’ now just cus I’m here, honey.” He teases, pressing a kiss to your lips as he starts swaying you to the song. You fold your hands behind his neck, leaning into him with a grin on your lips.
“How much did you see and hear?” You quirk your brow, moving one hand down to rest over his strong heartbeat in his warm chest.
“Just about enough to fall in love with you even more, darlin’.” He winks, and you playfully roll your eyes.
“Such a sweet talker you are, Miller.”
“What can I say? I’m crazy for my wife.” He grins before pressing his lips to yours, longer this time, before humming against your lips.
“Where’s Sarah?” He asks, rubbing small circles into your hips with his thumbs.
“Doing homework upstairs.”
“Mm. Dinner smells delicious.” Joel says, jutting his chin toward the pots on the stove that sat alongside the sheet of Texas toast.
“Thanks baby. Sarah and I decided on chicken alfredo. Hope you don’t mind.” You say, lightly scratching the back of Joel’s neck with your fingertips.
“Not at all, baby.” He tosses you a saccharine smile, resting his forehead against yours.
Your heart fluttered in your chest, always cherishing these intimate moments with Joel. Your love for him only grew by the day, always telling yourself how lucky you are you found a man like him.
He was your best friend, your life partner, your soulmate. You didn’t believe in any of that stuff before you met him, and now, you’re two years married and you still feel like you’re in the honeymoon stage.
“How was your day, baby?” You ask, retracting your forehead from his in the slightest so you could kiss the tip of his nose.
A groan rumbles in his sturdy chest and his eyebrows pinch together.
“Rather not talk about it, darlin’. Wanna dance with you instead.” He separates himself from you, grabbing hold of your hands as they slip off his body. He sways you back and forth before twirling you into his chest so your back against his front, rocking you side to side before planting a kiss to your cheek.
He twirls you again, and he can’t help but melt at your laugh and the way you look right now. So carefree, so full of love, so beautiful.
He grins as he pulls you to his chest gently, dipping your body down in his arms. He holds you there as the song comes to an end, those beautiful brown eyes of his boring into yours. You can’t help the lovestruck look that crosses your face.
He’ll never get tired of seeing that look.
He leans down to kiss you once more. It lasts more than a few seconds as his free hand that isn’t holding your body up cups your cheek, calloused thumb gently swiping over your soft skin.
“Oh– jeez,” Sarah’s voice startles you both, pulling apart from each other with a huff of a laugh.
“Get a room, you two!”
tags: @party-hearses ; @ilovepedro ; @punkshort ; @joelsgreys ; @nostalxgic ; @tinygarbage ; @bastardmandennis ; @pamasaur ; @cool-iguana ; @pascalpvnk
#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller fic#joel miller one shot#joel miller x reader#pedro pascal#joel miller fanfic#joel miller imagine#no outbreak!joel miller#husband! joel miller#pedro pascal imagines#joel miller imagines#joel miller fluff#joel miller x f!reader
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Submitted Prompts #156
Silly idea that I was inspired from the idea of Clark listening to Bruce's heartbeat sometimes to make sure he's doing ok that I read in a fanfic I cant remember the name of
Make this a soulmate au thing where you can hear your soulmates heartbeat, and well Danny after the Accident has a really slow one or when hes in his phantom form, no heartbeat at all.
Now imagine one of the batfam as Dannys soulmate, listening to his heartbeat just stop for several hours every so often or even multiple times a day. I can imagine the stress that must put on the poor batfam member until they realize that this is probably normal for their soulmate.
They still would probably be pretty messed up over it honestly, and going crazy trying to find their soulmate who keeps dying multiple times a day
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what once was mine | ch 8
Loki x Reader
Series Summary: When watching what once was supposed to be the rest of his life, in an empty room in the TVA, Loki sees someone he can't recognize; a girl who's all tenderness and loose smiles, and most importantly, she was smiling at him.
A/N: Yes, this is long overdue and I'm sorry for the long wait; but now it's finally here and I hope you can enjoy it, we're nearing the end :'). If it's been too long since you've read the other chapters, I'd maybe recommend checking them out again because we're picking it up right where we left off. The next chapters will be posted soon <3. Also, Mobius plays cupid here and we love him for it lol.
Masterlist | Read ch 7 here
You kept your head down as you walked, not particularly looking at where you were going. Rogue tears were falling onto TVA's hallways with each step you took, a hand covered your mouth to stifle the sobs. The sight of your rapidly moving shoes became more unfocused by the second.
You needed an out, you needed to breathe. And you didn't care that the bathroom you rushed into was a communal one, you slammed the door shut behind you and turned the lock, praying that the stalls were empty.
Silence hung in the air, the only sound being your heavy breathing. Gulping back a massive lump in your throat, you leaned back against the closed door. The smooth wood was cold, feeling going past the fabric of your shirt and raising goosebumps on your skin. With the back of your hand, you tried drying your tears.
Would this be it? Were you truly broken beyond repair?
You wanted to shout apologies in the air; for the Loki you'd just found, he deserved it, he did nothing wrong; for yourself, for the bruised heart beating in your chest that you'd promised to mend.
Part of you also wanted to berate yourself for being overly sentimental and utterly incapable of processing your feelings. For being stuck in this limbo.
You pressed your palms to your eyes, feeling them dampening, fingers shaking.
His touch had been like a bonfire on a cold night—a strange metaphor, given the fact his skin was usually colder than yours; yet it held truth—it enveloped your heart in a warm and familiar embrace, the most blissful kind of pain. It hurt, you couldn't quite place why, but it did.
Maybe it was the fear of knowing you wouldn't be able to live through another loss.
There were telltales of a steady rhythm thudding beneath your skin and through your veins; the ghosts of it tickled your fingertips and called out your name. His heartbeat, as real as you'd pleaded for in countless sleepless nights.
And when you finally held it in your hands again…
'But you're not him.'
You regretted it, probably as soon as the words left your mouth. Because… they were a lie. A lie you told yourself for fear of losing him, again.
Yet now, you couldn't help but feel like you just did.
─── ·❆· ───
Thor had once told Loki about the red string of fate—when the god of thunder had been strangely obsessed with Midgardian folklore in his teenage years. A red string that connected soulmates, it could stretch and bend as the two souls drifted apart and then met again, however, it would never break.
Now, as Loki heard your steps getting further and further away from him, he couldn't help but hear a snap.
Maybe he was the one who fucked it up, maybe it was his fault. You weren't his to have or to lose anyway. As much as he wished you were.
Loki stood awkwardly by your desk; he felt almost as if he was invading just because this was your space and, as you'd just made abundantly clear, you wanted nothing to do with him anymore.
He took advantage of your secluded nook to brush off the tear tracks on his cheeks—he didn't need anyone asking questions he barely knew the answers to—before running a hand through his hair, straightening the collar of his jacket, and taking a deep, hopefully steadying, breath.
For the first time, he felt utterly lost, without a north to guide him. He stalled by neatly organizing the mess that was your desk, thinking maybe you'd have a change of heart and come back to him. He stacked documents, organized pencils, and even folded a cardigan of yours that was hanging on the back of your chair.
Loki stalled the longest he could, until there was nothing more to tidy and no hope left. When you didn't come back, he walked up to the elevator, and now stared at the many buttons without knowing which to press. Truth be told, his mind was miles away; focused on the feeling of your soft skin against his and the sweet perfume of your shampoo. Would he ever get to feel you so close again?
"Hold it, please," Mobius called from a few steps away, hurriedly walking towards Loki. The god extended a hand to hold the doors open for him.
Mobius skipped into the elevator with a big sigh, clutching a rather large stack of documents to his chest. "Thanks," he breathed, shooting a glance at Loki. A beat passed and he did a double take, with a frown as he looked Loki over, who still glared at the buttons in front of him, all puffy eyes and pouty lips. "… What happened?" Mobius' voice held the tone of someone who probably already knew the answer he'd get. He reached past Loki and pressed the button that led to the cafeteria—a coffee break couldn't hurt.
For long seconds, Loki kept silent, contemplating whether to lie or be honest. He felt too drained to come up with a lie. "I… believe I messed it up."
Mobius didn't need names. He raised a hand to pat Loki's shoulder. "She'll come around, buddy."
Loki's eyebrows softened, he had a faint, bittersweet smile on his lips as his eyes welled up with tears again. It stung, bitterly. Perhaps he was never destined for happy endings. It was okay, he decided, he'd be okay with loving you from afar; so long as he got to love you at all. He already counted his lucky stars that the slim odds were in his favor and he got to meet you. "I don't think she will."
The weight of his words didn't go unnoticed by Mobius, who turned to Loki with a rather bewildered expression. "You really do like her… Don't you?"
Loki lowered his head, lips parting in a futile attempt to try and word his feelings. All he managed was a defeated sigh as he brought a hand up to rub one of his eyes. That was answer enough.
─── ·❆· ───
It's been a week. Or at least what would be the equivalent of a week in the TVA. You didn't know if you were the one avoiding Loki or if he was the one avoiding you. But you haven't seen each other ever since you said those hurtful words to him.
Your spoon clicked against the ceramic of your mug, stirring a coffee that had probably already gone cold. You stared off into space, watching from a secluded corner table as a few of your colleagues walked by with their own coffees, yet not actually seeing it. Your mind was elsewhere, drifting between what-ifs.
It's been like this, for this past week. Your mind mostly numb, stuck on auto-pilot. You couldn't stop thinking about him, couldn't stop missing him; his presence had become such a constant in your life these past couple of months that now that you didn't have it, a part of you felt hollow and empty. There was always a vacant chair beside you that left you feeling perpetually cold and alone.
The last few nights had been more sleepless than not, guilt ate away at your insides and kept you from diving into deep slumber. You wondered if the few grimaced smiles you received from your colleagues today were because you'd forgotten to hide the faint dark circles under your eyes.
"Good morning sunshine," Mobius slid into the chair next to you, placing his steaming mug on the table along with a single donut on a small plate. He took a momentary glance at you and his smile dropped a tad, "or maybe not so good."
You tried giving your friend a decent smile but you could tell by the look on his face that it didn't reach your eyes.
"I'll probably regret asking," Mobius pulled his chair closer, taking a sip of his coffee before continuing, "but what's wrong?"
You've never liked it when people asked you that question, it made you wish that your problems really were simple enough to be put into words. You avoided his eyes, something akin to shame and timidness twisting your stomach. "I'm- I'm not sure," a frown came to your brows, as if you were finally seeing past the fog. You shook your head softly, "I think I messed up."
"So I keep hearing," Mobius sighed. It wasn't condescending, no; it just looked like he was in on a secret you didn't know.
"I'm just… I'm so scared, Mobius." There was a sway to your voice that wasn't there before, with your heart on your mouth beating as raw as the wound you'd carried for so long. "I'm-" You hesitated, words heavy as you closed your eyes briefly. "I'm scared, and I'm still so confused."
You could feel the familiar sting of tears building behind your eyes. "I've wanted him back for so long, and seeing him again like this, it just-" Your lips hovered, trembling. You felt a warm touch landing on one of your hands, reassuring. You squeezed Mobius' fingers in gratitude. "… Now I have memories with him that only I've lived, and part of me still doesn't know what to think, what to do. And if I ever were to lose him again, I- I don't think I could…"
With a gentle nod, Mobius took hold of both your hands, he spoke slowly, "I understand… Well, maybe I don't," he chuckled, and when a small and genuine smile crept onto your lips, a proud glint came to his eyes. "But don't you think that, sometimes, we complicate things too much?" He asked, voice tender and drowning out the increasing hustle and bustle of TVA's cafeteria.
"You got him back." Mobius gave your hands a gentle shake to accentuate his words, voice low yet dripping with hope and excitement; "Yeah, maybe he comes from a little before you two met, but it's still the same Loki." He tilted his head with a tight smile, urging you to take his words to heart. "The one thing you wanted ever since you got here, don't you see how lucky you are? Maybe you should just let yourself be happy about that for a change."
For long seconds that felt like hours, you stayed silent, only feeling the bruising beating of your heart against your ribs. The air left your lungs and you had trouble pulling it back in.
He was right, wasn't he?
Maybe you could allow yourself to be happy after all this time. Maybe you could finally go to where your heart had been trying to lead you to. Maybe you really did get a second chance.
Yet, like freefalling into a frozen lake, the last words you'd said to him came rushing back. "I hurt him, Mobius." You winced at the memory, at the desolate look that had painted Loki's eyes as soon as you uttered the words.
'But you're not him.'
Oh, you couldn't have been more wrong then. Because when he looks at you with that same shine to his gentle eyes that had captivated you since the first time you'd met him on the grounds of New Asgard, when his voice takes on that special tone that's kept for you only, when he touches you with the same delicacy you'd always known, when he has the same bashful smile, laughs at the same jokes, drinks the same tea. How could he not be your Loki?
"It was the last thing I wanted, and it happened, and now I- I don't know if there's a way back from-"
"Listen to me," Mobius cut you off before you could go downhill into a pity party, "he's miserable, okay?" He spoke matter-of-factly, to which you only raised your eyebrows. "I'm serious, you should've seen him this morning, looked like a kicked puppy. Trust me when I tell you you're hurting him more by staying away." He added with a smirk; "and you two are killing me with all this 'will they, won't they'."
A small laugh escaped you as you raised a hand to dry your eyes and squeezed Mobius' ones with the other in a gesture that you hoped conveyed the immense gratitude you felt for him.
You missed Loki. You missed him so much it felt like a part of your soul had been torn out.
"Do you have any idea of where he is right now?"
─── ·❆· ───
You stepped into the smoked glass doorway as if you were walking a tightrope that might snap at any second. You held your breath as you went through, eyes closed, and hands clammy.
A familiarity lay heavy in the cold and fresh air, it has brought you peace many times before. The frozen grass crunched beneath your feet and the rustling of leaves did little to drown out the loud beating of your heart. You didn't need to open your eyes to know where you were, but you did anyway.
The clearing was the same as it's always been, with a few trees on both of the far sides, a clean and starry night sky that adorned the beginnings of the spectacle that was the northern lights, and finally, the lonely wooden bench in the middle.
Loki sat on the far right side of the bench you once shared. The night was cold and he only wore a simple dress shirt, for a second you wondered if he was not cold, before remembering his origins.
The moment feelt intimate, precious. You wondered if he knew you were there and chose to stay silent, or if he was too lost in his own what-ifs. You wondered if he's missed you as much as you missed him.
Your feet were glued to the ground, you noticed. Hands closed tightly into fists and mouth dry. A part of you remained so afraid still, as if, now that you're here, it might be too late.
From afar, you admired how Loki's hair flowed effortlessly with the breeze, coming loose from behind his ears and making you wish to run your fingers through it. He had his left hand lying beside him, fingertips touching the wood of the bench; as if reaching for something, someone, who's not there.
You caught it then, how, with the corner of his eye, he finally noticed your presence. You caught it by how his shoulders immediately tensed up and he looked straight ahead as if bracing for something.
No turning back now. You took the first step towards him.
⋆* ☾ ⋆*・゚:⋆*・゚
Ch 9 coming soon.
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#loki x reader#loki laufeyson#loki imagine#loki#marvel#loki series#loki x you#marvel x reader#loki x female reader#imagine#fanfic#angst#fluff#what once was mine#loki fanfic#my story#loki laufeyson x reader
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sunday (explicit)
genre: straight-up smut baybey, i did it y'all i wrote a pwp again
pairing: seokjin x reader
summary: you got your boyfriend exactly what he wanted for his birthday.
word count: 5k
contains: explicit sexual content~*~ say it with me: BRAT 👏 TAMER 👏 SEOKJIN 👏 established relationship, reader is uhhh 😬 Extremely bratty lmao, jin takes care of that, BDSM dynamics (mention of safewords and hand signals but neither are used!), reader gets spanked with a belt oop 🤭, fingering/a lil bit of eating it from the back, orgasm denial, big dick jin 😏, praise kink, mouth/throat fucking, a bit of breathplay, begging and apologizing, oh yeah she cries... like.... kind of a lot 🥲 there's a dacryphilia moment in there too (~*~add a little spice~*~), unprotected sex but they're in love it's fine, lots of subspace at the end, use of a vibrator, overstimulation, she comes.... idek how many times, and a smidge of aftercare 🫠 also i promise there's no food play, you'll get why the cake's there at the end ok lmao
A/N: a day late and a dollar short but hey that's my mental health rn 🫡 this was fun!!! always nice to dust off the ol' pwp muscles and frankly i've been itching to write proper BDSM for a bit now. sometimes you just wanna get the shit beat out of you lovingly and that's valid and sexy ya know. anyway feel free to silently skip this one if it's not for you!! and i know i'm gonna get a comment on it so 🙄 i used his korean age on purpose lmao 🙄 yes i can count and yes i know their system is changing~ ANYWAY i sincerely hope you enjoy babes and that you all had a lovely seokjin day 🥺 i loooove y'all !!! 💜
thank you to @haliiimede for beta reading and being my soulmate 🥺
read on AO3!
~*~
The slam of the front door tells you that your plan for today has worked perfectly.
Standing in front of the full length mirror in your bedroom, you adjust a final strap on your bralette, then quickly scramble to pull your clothes back on. You attempt to keep your expression innocent as you slip down the hallway to greet your boyfriend.
Before you can even make it, you hear the unmistakable pop of a wine bottle being uncorked, and you enter the kitchen just in time to see Seokjin leaning up against the counter with a glass of white in hand. He doesn’t look particularly pleased to see you.
“Hi baby,” you say, sweet as can be. “Can I have a glass?”
A muscle works in his jaw as he looks you over, and the expression on his face already has a flame licking in the pit of your stomach.
“That's all you have to say?” he finally answers.
You blink up at him, feigning ignorance. Your heartbeat has started to race behind your ribs, sensing imminent danger— the good kind.
“I haven't heard from you all day today,” he tries again.
You shrug. “I was still sleeping when you left this morning, and then, I don't know. I was doing things. Does it matter?” If Seokjin wasn’t already pissed, you know your last question will get him. You turn away to busy yourself with retrieving a wine glass so he can’t see the smile you’re trying to bite back.
The tone of his voice makes you freeze, glass in hand. “I don't recall saying you could have any.”
Your lower lip juts out automatically, and you do your best to steady your breathing without making it apparent. Even your voice comes out a little shaky. “But we always share.”
The silence in the kitchen feels deafening, punctuated by the soft tap of Seokjin setting his glass on the counter. You mirror him, swallowing hard as he steps in to close the distance between you. It never gets any less exciting to have him tower over you, big and broad-shouldered, tall enough that you have to look up through your lashes to meet his gaze. A dull ache starts to pulse between your legs.
“Do you know what today is?”
You lick your lips and try to speak. “Sunday?”
It’s like you barely get the word out before he’s gripping your jaw with one large hand, and you can feel your heartbeat in your throat. Anticipation buzzes through your body, all the way down to your toes, as he forces your chin up.
“Anything else?” His voice sounds like a warning.
Your mouth pulls into a grin beneath his grasp, one you can’t quite manage to keep innocent. “Oh, Seokjin, is it your birthday? I knew I was forgetting something. Oops.”
“Fucking brat.”
All at once Seokjin locks an arm around your hips, and you let out a shrill squeak as your feet leave the floor entirely when he outright slings you over his shoulder. This is, of course, exactly what you’d hoped for, but you struggle a little in his grip nonetheless. All part of the fun.
You’d left the bedroom door cracked on your way out to greet him, and he takes the opportunity to kick it back open. A shiver runs up your spine at the sight, and then you hit the bed hard enough to knock the breath out of your lungs.
You push up onto your hands as you sit up, slightly dizzy.
“That hurt, Seokjin,” you whine, but you both know you don’t mean it. You have agreed-upon methods of telling him when he’s really hurting you in a way that doesn’t feel good: safewords, even hand signals for when you’re rendered non-verbal. Anything said that isn’t one of those is just you running your mouth on purpose, winding him up. Like now. “You’re being so dramatic.”
“And you’ve got a fucking attitude today,” he snaps. “Is this really how you want to do this? On my fucking birthday?”
You blink up at him with the same sweet smile. “What if I told you I got you a present?”
This seems to surprise him a little, and he pauses, like he doesn’t quite buy it. “A present, huh?”
“Mm-hmm.” You nod as you get to your feet. “Let me unwrap it for you.”
Taking your time with it, you peel off your sweatshirt and leggings to reveal the lingerie you pulled on as he was coming home. It’s a soft pink set with a floral design, thin straps, and romantic lace, and you happen to think it does wonders for your curves.
“What do you think?”
You can see the hungry gleam in Seokjin's eyes even as he scoffs, feigning disinterest. “Oh, this is my present? A disrespectful brat that I have to teach a lesson? I should rip this shit off.”
“Hey, this was expensive!” you snap, and he arches an eyebrow as if to give you a final chance to behave. It just makes you want to push him that much further.
You step closer, allowing a perfect line of sight to your tits that threaten to spill out of their confinements, and you soften your voice when you speak again. “What, you don’t forgive me, Seokjin?”
The corner of his mouth just barely ticks up. “You know the rules. Forgiveness is earned.”
He reaches a hand down to undo the buckle of his belt, and your nipples are suddenly painfully hard against the lace fabric. You can’t remember the last time he used his belt. Fuck, he’s really mad.
“Bend over.”
You huff a sigh as you drape yourself over the edge of the bed, and his hands are already on your ass. He makes a low noise of appreciation as his fingertips dig into your supple skin, pressing firm enough to make you wince. He's not being gentle, and you don’t want him to be.
Your eyes flutter closed in enjoyment of being manhandled like this, and you get so lost in it that it takes you a second to realize Seokjin has asked you a question. By then it’s already too late.
He gives a warning slap to your ass as he repeats himself. “I said, how old am I?”
You peek over your shoulder, wiggling your ass against the flat of his palm, only for him to smack you hard over your left cheek. You bite back a whimper, not wanting to give him the satisfaction.
“I don't know,” you lie, blinking up at him. “You’re so old now, it’s hard to remember.”
In one swift move, he yanks his belt out from around his waist, and you swallow hard as you watch him fold it over in his hands.
“Then why don’t you fucking count for me.”
The belt cracks down over your ass, and you flinch at the first real rush of pain. It takes you a second to regain focus, your brain still buzzing from the hit, and then his words come back to you.
“One.”
“So you are capable of listening, huh?”
Another hit, equally as hard on the other side, and you grit your teeth.
“Two.”
“Aw, where’d that smart mouth go? Not so chatty now?” Seokjin cracks the belt again, and you can barely get the word three out before four is being delivered just as harshly. You squeeze your eyes shut and try to breathe. He's really hitting hard tonight.
“Four,” you gasp, and you hear Seokjin exhale a dark laugh above you.
“Better toughen up, sweetheart. We’ve got a long way to go.” Another hit in the same spot, this one enough to really sting.
“Five.”
“You know, since I'm so old.”
The next blow he delivers is so hard, the word comes out as a cry of pain. “Six!”
You flatten your pelvis down against the sheets, as if in an attempt to hide from the beating, but there’s nowhere to go. The extra pressure makes you feel how hard your clit has started to throb from your punishment. You bury your face in the crook of your elbow, your hips jerking reflexively as you moan through seven, eight, nine.
Every muscle in your body seizes taut as you prepare for ten, trying to encourage yourself to breathe through it, though all you can get out right now are shallow gasps for air. I can take this, you tell yourself, I can take this.
But it doesn’t come. You’re pulled so tight you think you might snap, and you manage to lift your head up from your arms to look back at Seokjin.
“There she is,” he says, and the soft tone of his voice in no way influences how hard he brings the belt down over your ass.
“Ten!” you groan, and the sharp bite of pain over your already raw skin nearly brings tears to your eyes. And he’s not even halfway done.
It’s all you can do now to remember what number you’re on, especially as Seokjin continues to allow torturously long pauses between his hits. He'll wait just long enough that your heartbeat starts to slow, teasing the thin length of the belt up the backs of your thighs, sometimes even with a laugh.
But it’s not relief: the waiting keeps every inch of you on edge, all wound up with anticipation of the next dose of pain, so tense you’re not sure you’re breathing.
You’ve hardly choked out fourteen when you flinch at a brush of contact, the warm touch of skin where you were expecting the crack of leather. Letting your forehead drop against the bed, you pant like you’ve just run a marathon as Seokjin's hand moves over your abused flesh, groping and massaging as he did before. You can’t tell if it’s been minutes or hours since then, but his touch is grounding, calming, even when his fingers sink into your fresh bruises with enough force to make you whimper.
You can feel the way the seam of your panties sticks to your center now, and you can only imagine that they must be entirely soaked through, your slickness already starting to paint the crux of your thighs. With a soft whine of need, you spread your legs a little wider in search of anything but more pain.
“What do you think?” Seokjin's voice is dark when he speaks, thick with lust. The thought of him straining hard against his pants has you practically drooling on the mattress. You want nothing more than that cock stretching you open right now. “Starting to learn your lesson?”
As much as the rational part of you appreciates the check-in, you can’t ignore the new rush of rebellion that surges up at the question. What, does he think you need him to go easy? Does he think you’re not tough enough, that you can’t take everything he’s willing to give you?
You push up to look over your shoulder at him again, your jaw set firm. “No.”
Anger flashes over his face, but he can’t quite hide his smile. “Then I guess I can stop holding back.”
Shit, he was—? You don’t get the opportunity to finish that thought before the loop of his belt is whizzing through the air, and the impact it makes against your ass hits so hard, you momentarily see stars. “Fuck!”
“That's not a fucking number.”
“Fifteen,” you gasp, dropping limp against the bed like a ragdoll, breathless with relief that you didn’t lose track. “Fifteen.”
“The brat can count,” Seokjin remarks, and then he delivers sixteen just as hard and your whole body spasms from the pain as you choke out the number. “If only you knew how old I was, you might have some idea of how much longer I have to beat your ass.”
Your eyes are really starting to well up now, but you force yourself to keep breathing, to focus on his words. It might be coded to fit the scene, but it’s a clear reminder nonetheless: you’re more than halfway. You can do this.
By twenty, the tears have started to spill down your face, but Seokjin knows you well enough to know the scene doesn’t stop unless you call a safeword. He trusts you to know your own limits, and you do. But fuck, he can really test them sometimes. You’re dying for him to touch you, fuck you, do anything but keep fucking beating you. It’s taking everything in you to keep going, your feet kicking helplessly each time he brings the belt down over your tender backside. He hasn’t lightened the weight of his hits up even in the slightest. If anything, they’re only getting worse.
“Twenty-one,” you breathe. You only have ten hits left, and you’ve already gotten through ten hits twice now. You can do this.
“Twenty-two.” You tell yourself not to fight it.
“Twenty-three.” Just give into the pain.
“Twenty-four.” Submit.
Your shoulders heave with sobs as the twenty-fifth strike finally, finally breaks your last resolve. You press your face into the mattress; you’re crying so hard you can scarcely breathe. Even though your body keeps flinching with the reflexive animal reaction to try and get away from the pain, your mind has fully accepted your punishment, all the fight gone out of you.
It’s like someone else is counting for you now, so much so that you don’t even realize what number Seokjin is on until the words leave your mouth.
“Thirty-one.”
You hear the jingle and thud of the belt hitting the floor, and then his gentle hands are encouraging your legs to spread apart. The brush of his fingers over your aching core is sweet, overwhelming relief from the pain still coursing through your system. You’d think it’d be enough to make you cry, if you weren’t already.
“Good girl,” he says softly, and that small praise alone has you floating straight up to the ceiling.
His hands move quickly to pull your panties down and off, and you work to get your breathing back under control, letting your sobs dissolve into sniffling gulps. You whimper when his palms slip under your hips, encouraging you up onto your knees. Your body shivers all over as you try to hold yourself up, to be good, and then you feel Seokjin slip two fingers into your drenched center.
“Oh my god,” you groan as he starts to rub diligently at the ridges of your front wall, his free hand gripping your ass to spread you open. His touch in both places at once, pressing down on fresh swollen bruises and curling up into the sweetest part of you, it’s so good. It reminds you why you willingly give yourself over to this man, the one you love so much, the only one who can make you feel like this. You’re so turned on from the mix of pleasure and pain, you might be close to blacking out.
The bed creaks as he shifts a little, and then he replaces his fingers with his mouth, and you keen. You bury your sounds in the crook of your elbow as his tongue plunges into you, and he snakes a hand between your legs to rub slow circles over your clit. Your mind is reeling; you can barely manage to speak.
“S-Seokjin,” you gasp. “You’re g-gonna, ngh, gonna make me—”
He pulls off just enough to mutter, “You better fucking ask first.”
You swear he ups the intensity on purpose when his mouth returns to your pussy, as if to drag you that much closer to the edge. His thumb is working so perfectly at your clit, you can feel your thighs starting to shake as you writhe back against him. “Can I— can I please come, Seokjin? Pleaseplease, please?”
“No.”
His voice is firm, unbothered, and paired with the painful loss of his touch all at once. A strangled sob of frustration escapes you as you collapse against the bed, exhausted from holding yourself up and from your denied release.
“Not yet,” Seokjin continues. “Not until you’ve learned to be a little more obedient.”
His strong hand closes over your bicep, and he easily flips you over onto your back, causing you to hiss at the graze of your sore flesh against the sheets. Your lower lip trembles, your eyes threatening tears as you stare up at him, but you stay quiet.
“Be a good girl,” Seokjin says, dragging one finger up the column of your throat. You willingly tip your head back for him as a shiver rolls through you. “Let me fuck this smart mouth, then I’ll make you come as many times as you can handle. Okay?”
When you nod softly, he hauls you up to your feet. “Get on your knees.”
You do as he says, sitting back on your heels and watching as he works his pants and boxers down to free his cock. He’s thick and long, flushed dark and dripping hard. Big enough that you go slightly cross-eyed trying to take him in. Your cunt clenches desperately at his size, at how badly you need all of him inside you, bottoming out into you again and again.
But even moreso, you want to be good.
“Mouth open,” Seokjin instructs, and you comply, letting your tongue loll out for him as he tangles a hand in your hair.
He guides himself between your lips, and your eyes roll back at the weight of him on your tongue, the feeling of your jaw stretching open to fit him. He’s so fucking big, it’s uncomfortable, but you do your best to breathe around him and give into it.
Trying to hold still, hands placed sweetly on your thighs because you know he likes it that way, you blink up at Seokjin as he starts to thrust into your mouth. You can taste the salt of his precum as his length drags along your tongue, and you fight back the urge to gag when the tip of his cock nudges into the back wall of your throat. He groans softly as he rubs himself there, his grip on your hair tightening until the pain stings your scalp. Your eyes start to water as you try to keep yourself from choking.
“Fuck,” he hisses when he pulls out, saliva stringing in thick strands from your mouth to the head of his cock. He squeezes at the base of it, eyes glazed dark with lust, and you take in as much air as you can, the cool rush painful where your throat is sore from the stretch of him.
You sit up taller as if to ask for more.
Seokjin’s gaze meets yours as the hand on his cock guides it back toward you, but he doesn’t slip back into your mouth. His eyes are fixated hungrily on your face as he drags the head of his dick down over your bottom lip, teasing it around your mouth and along your cheeks, clearly enjoying that he can do whatever he wants with you.
Your pulse drums loudly in your ears as you sit there, mouth open, and take it. The whole lower half of your face must be slick with spit and precum now, given how easily he glides across your skin, and then you’re hit with the heavy thud of him smacking his cock once, twice, three times against your flat, willing tongue.
“Are you done being a brat now?” he prompts, and you can feel drool spilling down your chin as you nod, his cock still weighing heavy on your outstretched tongue. He slips it in a little further, just past the ring of your lips.
“Gonna be a good girl for me?”
A soft whine escapes around his girth filling your mouth. You nod again, desperate, and then he hits the back of your throat with enough force to make you gag noisily. Your body shudders beneath him, and you try to keep it together.
“Learned your fucking lesson?”
Tears start to sting at the corners of your eyes as he keeps sliding himself into your mouth, the head of his cock dipping down into the tight clutch of your throat, as far as he can go until your nose is flush with his abdomen. You can’t make another sound, your mouth crammed too full, but you do your best to nod even as you lose the ability to keep breathing.
Seokjin’s thumb brushes over the bulge in your throat, and you know what he wants. Tears slip down your cheeks as you squeeze your eyes shut and swallow around him, and he rewards you with an unabashed moan that lights up everything inside you.
“That’s it. You look so good when you cry on my cock,” he rasps, his hand closing over your throat as you swallow again.
You can feel yourself starting to get light headed from lack of oxygen as more tears stream down your face, but the praise spurs you on. You want it too much, it makes you eager to please at any cost, despite the dizzying surge of adrenaline, despite the way your throat is spasming painfully now. You’ll pass out with his cock down your throat, if that’s what it takes.
He pulls out all at once, and the rush of air you heave in is like broken glass against your raw throat. You fall forward, your palms just barely catching you from landing directly onto your face, and you can’t do anything for a moment but breathe in ragged, shaky gasps. Tears are still welling up in your eyes, dripping down onto the carpet beneath you.
Your world tilts as Seokjin easily scoops you up in his arms just to drop you onto the bed, flat on your back. There’s still the dull ache of the bruises he beat into your ass, but it’s like someone’s turned the volume down on it. All your physical sensations seem distant, like they’re happening to someone else, even the dull ache thudding between your legs, a desperate desire to come that was only made worse by being used as your boyfriend’s fucktoy.
Your eyes flutter closed as his hands slip up your body to undo your lacy bralette and peel it off of you, and you don’t fight it.
“Hey, hey. Look at me.” Seokjin's voice pulls you back from the edge, and you fight to open your eyes again. He's hovering over you, fully stripped now, his brow creased slightly with concern. “Stay with me a little bit longer, okay?” His tone is still serious, and you sniff softly as you nod.
He slips a palm encouragingly under your thigh and you do the rest, so out of body that it’s like you weigh nothing at all as you pull your knees up to effectively bend yourself in half for him. He practically growls at the sight of you spread for him so willingly, presenting a cunt swollen with need, painted glossy with arousal.
You watch through heavy-lidded eyes as he kneels up on the bed, and then his thick cock is grinding over you, dragged right up your center. The feeling of finally being touched where you need it most has you exhaling a moan of relief.
“Is this what you want?” Seokjin's breath is hot on your neck and chased by the scrape of his teeth, earning another noise of pleasure from you. Your clit throbs as he rolls the head of his dick over it, up and down, slow teasing.
“Yes,” you manage to gasp. Your voice comes out a little broken from your scraped-up throat. “Yes, please. Please fuck me, please, want it so bad.”
“Which do you want more?”
You’re so gone, choking on whimpers and whines, that his hand closes over your throat to make you focus on the rest of his question. The look on his face is so dark, it sends a shiver down your spine.
“My dick, or my forgiveness?”
Tears spring to your eyes immediately as an overwhelming wave of emotions floods through you. There isn’t a doubt in your mind what your answer is, you don’t even have to pause to consider it. As badly as you want, need him to fuck you, the thought of Seokjin discarding you when he’s finished, still upset, not kissing every inch of your skin, not praising you for being so good… you can’t bear it.
“Your forgiveness,” you sob, doing your best to keep breathing despite his hand around your throat. “Please, please, please forgive me. I'm so sorry. I just wanna be good, wanna be good for you, I don't need anything else.”
You can see his face soften even through the tears that blur your vision. “There she is,” he murmurs, and then he tips his head down to brush his lips over yours. The warm touch of his mouth is all the reward you could ever ask for, and he sucks sweetly on your bottom lip before pulling back.
“Good answer, babygirl.”
Before you can even process what’s happening, he’s fucking the whole of his thick cock into you, and you can only keen as he stretches you wide enough to fit all of him. Your walls are immediately trembling tight to him from how edged close you’ve been all night.
“Thank you,” you moan, your head dropping back against the pillow. A gasp rips through you as he bottoms out, your spine arching when the crown of his cock presses firmly on your cervix. “Thank you, oh fuck.”
“Yeah,” Seokjin purrs, his mouth against your collarbone. You think he might be sucking a mark into your skin, but it’s already getting hard to tell what’s happening. “You always take it so well after I beat the brat out of you. Let go now, baby. You’ve earned it.”
You’re grateful for the permission, because you’re not sure you could stay tethered any longer if you tried. Not when he’s splitting you open, thrusting hard and deep because he knows you can take it, with a cock fat enough to light up every sweet spot in you at once. Your eyes roll back as you start to float, so out of it that you barely even notice a faint buzzing sound until you realize Seokjin is pressing your vibrator down against your swollen, aching clit.
Fuck, when did he even grab it off the nightstand?
You’re vaguely aware of someone moaning, but it doesn’t even feel like you. You’ve given up entirely to it now, a sweet surrender to this all-encompassing pleasure. It’s so good, too good, it slips you out of your mind and body alike, like he’s fucking your brain right out of your skull.
“That’s it, come on my cock,” Seokjin groans, and fuck, you are, you’re coming hard enough to drench his cock with every pulse of your needy cunt. “Such a good girl.”
He doesn't even pull the toy off to give you a moment of recovery, just keeps it nestled between your folds as he pounds into you. Your hips shudder violently as you coast out of your first climax and straight into another one.
It all starts to blur together now, wave after wave of orgasm washing over you until you’re drowning in it. You come and come and come until it feels like you’re melting into the bed, pinned through by this massive cock and the endless mind-numbing buzz on your clit. You can distantly tell that you’ve soaked a wet spot into the sheets beneath you, that your thighs and even the muscles of your ass are shaking from overstimulation.
“S-S-Seokjin.” It takes you three tries to get his name out, and you’re still not really sure if you said it until the toy switches off. The humming sensation is still reverberating through your body even in the absence of it, enough to make you tremble all over as he picks up the pace.
“Gonna fucking— fill you up,” Seokjin grunts, voice thick with effort, and then his cock twitches at the very back of you, buried deep as it can go, pulsing heavy as he paints you with rope after rope of his release.
You’re still not here, not really, not when he pulls out with a heavy sigh, when the cum starts to drool down your legs, when he drops onto the mattress beside you and pulls you into him. It comes back to you in pieces: you’re shivering all over, breathing hard, your face is wet— fuck, when were you crying?
It takes you several moments to realize Seokjin is murmuring in your ear, that his fingers are carding through your hair, his breath ghosting over your skin. “Just breathe, baby. Did so well, it’s over now. You’re safe.”
As the post-scene comedown settles into your bones, you bury your face into his shoulder, trying to breathe through the myriad of emotions and chemicals flooding your system. He pulls the blanket up over your chest, and the warmth of it and his body help to gently bring you down from the high.
You don’t know how long you lay like that until you finally manage to squeak out a question. “Y-you’re not really mad, right?”
Seokjin laughs gently as he presses a kiss to your hairline. “No, baby. I know you didn’t really forget. The birthday cake in the fridge kinda gave it away.”
The words take a second to hit you, and then a dazed giggle bubbles up in your chest. It’s like you’re floating as you start to laugh, your face still pressed into Seokjin’s skin, and you can feel the rumble of him laughing too. It didn’t even occur to you that he would’ve seen the fucking cake when he grabbed himself a bottle of wine.
“Oh,” is all you can think to say, and you keep giggling as his lips move over the line of your jaw, trailing kisses.
“You’re cute when you’re trying to get punished,” he says softly. “It's part of why I love you. You’re my perfect little brat. And this was the perfect gift, seriously.”
A warm glow blooms in your chest at the praise, and you sigh happily as you curl up against his side. “Can we eat cake in bed?”
Seokjin leans down to brush his mouth over yours, sweetly adoring. “Anything you want.”
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Let me follow II
Pairing: Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Fremen!soulmate! reader Summary: Na-Baron tirelessly pursues and tracks you across Arrakis. You hide in the sands of Dune as best you can, but will it be enough to escape your soulmate with whom you want nothing to do with? Warning: violence; blood; Feyd Rautha; death; soulmate au!; Taglist: @avidreader73 @wo-ming-bai @shara-ne @alana4610 Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~ Main Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~ Part I ~•♤♤♤•~ Part III ~•♤♤♤•~
You close your eyes and hide your face in the brown scarf around your head. You listen to the sounds of the desert, the gentle sound of sand blowing in the wind, and the gerbils around you, trying to find some shade from the Arrakis' sun.
You breathe evenly and calmly, hearing the blood pulsing in the veins of the animals around you. You freeze, feeling heartbeats that are too loud and rare to belong to any of the creatures of Dune.
Your fingertips brush the sand beneath you, drawing patterns in it. You're manipulating the thick blood in their veins, and by the way you're having a hard time controlling it, you realise who your sudden guests are.
The Harkonnens.
"Did you sense something?" Your father asks while kneeling beside you. You sweep the sand with your hand, making your drawings and patterns disappear from view.
"The Harkonnens. In the southeast. At least 10 of them." You reply, poking your head out of your hiding place. You can't see anything in your line of sight, but you can clearly feel several heartbeats, unlike anything that lived on Arrakis.
"I'll tell the rest. Stay back. We need to make sure we don't have anyone following us if we want to get back to our sietch."
"He won't give up." You answer him, still staring at the desert. "Na-Baron. He will chase after me until he gets me." You don't have to tell him about it. He knows as well as you do that the Harkonnen's patrols have become more frequent and that you have had to escape from them faster than usual.
Na-Baron was looking for you. He made no secret of it. You know from your scouts that he himself commanded one of the units, moving through your territory like a snake, avoiding your ambushes, and entering your sietchs, leaving behind only ashes, ruins, and a sea of blood.
"He will never..."
"Are you so sure?" You interrupt him, scolding him for still clinging to false hope.
One day he will finally get you; the only question was how long it would take you to run away from him again after he catches you. And how long will you be able to enjoy freedom again in the sands of Dune.
"I… really would like to believe that I am." Your father admits it with sadness. You both turn towards the vast sands before you.
The sun burns down on you, making your body sweat more and more. The droplets flow into the tank in the suit. This is your only consolation. At least you're not wasting your water on your run.
"You don't have to protect me. I know Arrakis; I have my power. I can run away as long as I want." You say, glancing briefly at your father.
Now that the threat from the Harkonnens is even more real, you'd rather keep him away from it all. You wouldn't want them to capture him and use him as leverage against you. You didn't want him to get hurt because of you. Or anyone.
"You can run as lons as you are able to." He corrects you and pushes you back towards the rest of the group. You sigh, obediently following him. "And I want to make sure that you... are ready for what is waiting for you at the end of this race."
"Race with fate or time?" You ask him skeptically. You reach for your powers and try to refocus on the location of the Harkonnen group. Their hearts beat faster. You unconsciously wonder if Na-Baron is with them this time...
"You should try to get some sleep." Your father helps you to get on the sandworm you had previously put into a coma. You wait patiently until the entire group gets on the creature and wakes it up. Sand hits your face as the animals start to move and cross the desert.
"I... I have to be aware of our surroundings." You answer evasively, sensing Harkonnens. They were far behind you. For now.
"You can't be like that all the time. Go to sleep. I will take care of everything." Your father assures you and places a kiss on your temple.
You sigh, closing your eyes. You hadn't slept soundly for several nights, too afraid that you would meet Na-Baron in your dreams. If you did nap, it was only during the day and only for a few hours—at times when he couldn't contact you through dreams. You wonder if Reverend Mother could help you block this… connection between you two. But before you travel north, you must first hide out for a few weeks in the safe corridors of your sietch.
Maybe you'll manage to lose the Na-Baron who chased you so tirelessly. You were curious if the stars would show you such a great blessing.
"Thank you, father." You reply with a small smile, deciding to follow your father's wishes and try to take a nap.
So you snuggle up in an unfolded blanket and place yourself on the sandworm's back, allowing the walls of your makeshift shelter to keep you on the back of the rushing creature. The sound of the sand blowing through the air and the heartbeat of other people on it lulls you to sleep.
But as Na-Baron promised, you will soon find that there is no escape from him.
Even during the day.
There is blood around you. A lot of blood. It's pouring through holes in one of your hiding places' corridors. You cover your nose with your elbow and walk forward, your shoes soaked in the crimson liquid as you walk forward towards the exit. The blood reaches your knees when HE stands in your way.
"What is this?" You ask him, letting a drop of blood fall from the ceiling onto your lips as you move your elbow away from your face. The smell of blood fills your nostrils. But you can't hear any other heartbeats than yours and Na-Baron's.
"The future—if you keep running away. I must admit that each time it takes me a while to track you, but eventually you will make a mistake. And I will patiently wait for that to happen." You shiver, hearing his low growl close to you.
He acted so casually, as if there wasn't crimson blood dripping from the ceiling on you. He was too sure that his plan would come true. You wanted to tear away this overconfidence from him.
"And how can you be so sure of that? After all, you didn't even get a chance to take a few glimpses at me these past few days. How is your leg, by the way? I hope it hurts just as much as you hurt my people in your… prison." You scoff, not considering this small, cramped cell in the Harkonnen's stronghold as a real prison. It was a place of carnage, filled with death, the stench of blood, fear, and the helplessness of your people. And behind it all was your own soulmate…
"I'm very glad you are concerned about my well-being, darling. Especially since you were the one to stick a dagger into my knee. Fortunately, I have excellent healers. You'll find out about it yourself after our wedding night." You laugh mockingly at his words, shaking your head in disbelief.
How delusional he must have been to even assume that you would rather marry him than gut yourself before he even had the slightest chance to lay his little finger on you again?
"I would rather be eaten by a sandworm." You reply and push past him to leave. Feyd lets you in, inhaling your delicate scent as you walk past him. He grabs the scarf covering your head and untangles you from it. The material stays in his hands as you run away from him as far as possible.
Feyd takes a second to bury his nose in the scarf and inhale its delicate scent. He promises himself that next time he will inhale your scent directly from you—and definitely not in his dream.
He comes back to you, silently walks up to you, and hugs you from behind. He catches you by surprise and pulls you into his chest. You fight against him, struggling in his grip, but he just puts his chin on your shoulder and nuzzles his nose into your neck, not caring about your attempts to fight him.
"Are you enjoying the view?" He whispers into your ear and runs his tongue over your lobe. You shiver in his arms, and Feyd relishes every moment of how you feel in his strong grip. Like a small, trembling kitten that needs to be taken care of—taken care of by him and only him.
You acted so differently. In his dreams, you were a perfect little mouse that he could play with as he pleased, but in reality, you showed that you had a lot of rebellion in yourself to use. And while he was amazed by your cunning, thoughtfulness, and courage, it became irritating as he chased you halfway across the desert without making much progress. The itch in his pants was equally irritating.
"I'll never let you do that." You snap at him, pained to see the sight of a colonised Arrakis.
The Harkonnen's machines worked to extract the spice, and the bald men themselves... cleaned up the bodies of your men, feeding them to the sandworms. You felt sick just looking at it. And it was just a dream. You're afraid and wonder: What would be your reaction if it all happened for real?
"I'm afraid there's not much you can do. Especially from your little hiding place." He wraps his hand around your throat and squeezes it tight. You gasp in shock, struggling for air. You grab his hand and try to pull it away from your neck, but he's not strong enough for you to even make him move an inch. "Either you leave your little hiding place willingly, or I will chase you out with smoke, fire, and the blood of your people."
“Possibly…” You breathed out, wrapping your hand around the hilt of his sword. "But first you have to find me." You gasp and pull his blade from its sheath.
You swing, aiming for his exposed neck, but he anticipates your attack. He pushes you, disturbing your balance. You fall to your knees on the sands of Arrakis, breathing heavily as air finally flows freely into your throat.
However, this small moment of bliss does not last long. You roll onto your back and block his attack. Your blades clang as they meet, sweat dripping down your forehead and your heart racing, pumping adrenaline further through your system.
Na-Baron is on one knee, pressing his black steel sword at you. You shiver, feeling your muscles slowly give out, tiring as you try to push him away.
You gasp, pushing both of your blades out of each other's hands. You squeeze his neck in a tight grip, at which he does the most astounding, shocking thing—a thing that you didn't expect anyone to do in this situation.
He takes advantage of your surprise and disarms you. You growl, digging your nails into his neck and squeezing as hard as you can, cutting off any air he can get, but that seems to do no serious harm to him. You gasp as he collapses on top of you, pinning you to the sand with his full weight, and captures your lips in a passionate kiss.
There is nothing gentle about this kiss—and you don't expect it to be. You've learnt that the Harkonnens are rough, brutal, and sadistic. Their leader must therefore be far worse than they are, representative of the thoroughly disgusting nature of his people.
And though you fight and squirm, trying to break free from his grip, you can't say you don't like the way his mouth takes control of yours. You find it strange that even though you hate his insides and everything he stands for, somehow his touch, kisses, and scent still numb you in a… pleasant way.
This must be another spell of his, another trick he uses to draw you into him. You're still not sure exactly how he created this... connection between you, but you know it's definitely not natural. He may have been your soulmate, but centuries ago someone made sure you didn't feel any connection to the person you were supposed to be with.
You shiver as he caresses the skin of your wrist, where a centuries-old scar with the initials of your soulmate is visible. His initials, as it turned out.
"Tell me your name." He demands, pressing wet kisses along your jawline. You hiss at the feel of his cold, black saliva on your skin, the way it soaks into you... you can't waste any water...
You shake your head, trying to pull away from his small kisses, but that only gives him more room to manoeuvre on your skin. You can only sigh and bite your lip as he caresses you through the layers of your clothes, searching like a snake for a place he can crawl into to feel the softness of your skin.
"Your. Name. My. Desert. Rose." He growls with each press of his lips to your skin, fighting against your grip on his neck as you try to strangle him. Which proves to be a difficult task since you’re distracted by sensations he is giving you. Sensations you are ashamed of feeling. But your body can’t recognise an enemy like your mind can.
“Fuck off,” you say, glad for the little bit of control you still have over your body. Your lower half inevitably responds to his demands, growing wet and desperate for his touch. It takes all of your control not to join in his fun and grind against his thigh in time with the way he rubs the growing bulge in his pants against you.
"Oh, I will. As soon as I get my hands on you, I will." He growls against your neck with every last bit of air he has.
You shudder as his teeth sink into your flesh; he groans as if he's just tasted the finest, blood-red wine. The fingers of his hand dig painfully into your hips as he grinds against your core. You bite your lip, barely holding back a moan as you feel his hard length.
"I will find you. I will find you and fuck you until you forget you hate me. You will cry with pleasure, scream, and beg for more. I will turn you into my perfect, obedient whore, my desert rose. I will claim you as I claim Arrakis and your people. You will be a beautiful embodiment of my power—my pretty little prize." He growls against your skin, slowly removing your top layer of clothing. Your body shivers; goosebumps rise on your skin with each gentle brush of his fingertips.
You move your hand to the back of his head, digging your nails into the pale skin. He hisses, sucking a hickey on your neck, unaware that you've stolen his dagger…
You feel him freeze as you drive the dagger straight through his neck. Black blood drips down onto you, running along your collarbone and soaking into the fabric of your bra.
"You… will be mine…" He growls with his last strength, spitting blood at you as the connection between you closes. And you fall into the black void of dreamless sleep. A void where you deeply ponder what you've seen.
~•♤♤♤•~ A month later... ~•♤♤♤•~
You stroll through the marketplace, your nose buried in your black scarf. You discreetly observe the Harkonnen soldiers patrolling the area as you push through the sea of people to get to the waterskin stand.
Some women give you a sympathetic look, seeing your "mourning" attire; others try to look away. You mentally praise yourself for choosing your cover. It wasn't so easy to get a widow's black outfit, but it was worth the effort. The Harkonnens, despite their reputation for great brutality, didn't touch widows and didn't talk to them; they weren't the object of any interest or suspicion. It was strange that in all their brutality, lack of morality, and so on, they respected the period of mourning, especially for women.
You had been on the run from Feyd for a month now. During that time, you had separated yourself from your father and your group so that you could at least protect them from the wrath of the furious Harkonnen who was searching for you.
Although you must admit that the chase after you has slowed considerably in the last few days. You suspect that this had something to do with the baron's arrival on Arrakis. And his... unexpected death.
Yes. Feyd-Rautha became the new baron. You suspected that was why his men had been searching for you so intensely. However, to your great disappointment, he did not leave to Giedi Prime but remained on Arrakis.
You had thought long and hard about the reason, Na-Baron... Baron had decided he had to have you. Sure, you were his soulmate, but why had he decided now that he wanted you on his side? What did you have to offer him that made him willing to slaughter all of your men, destroy Dune, and devote practically all of his soldiers to finding you? There had to be something to it.
Your soulmate mark was the same enigma. There must have been a reason someone decided to cut out your skin with Harkonnen's initials tattooed on it, leaving you with only a faint scar.
You buy water, straining your ears to listen to the rumours carried by the Fremen whispering around you. Everyone was talking about only one thing.
A possible attack by Muad'Dib on the Emperor, his daughter, and the new Baron. These three had gathered recently on Arrrakis to discuss some of their business. Perhaps the main topic of their conversations was the new messiah of your people—the one they had spoken of for centuries, the one who would bring heaven to the sons and daughters of the desert.
You had only seen Muad'Dib once. And you preferred to keep it that way. You didn't read his eyes well. Instead of the expected messiah, you saw a coldly calculating man hungry for power, willing to do anything to avenge those who had brought ruin to his house. Paulk Atreides might have been less of a threat to your people than the Harkonnens, but he was still a threat. Especially his Bene Gesserit mother, who had become the reverend mother. And even more so the child in her womb.
The Harkonnens brought destruction and death. But in your visions (on those nights when you didn't dream of your soulmate/nemesis), you saw Paul Atreides pouring a sea of blood onto Arrakis, which seeped into every tiny sand of Dune.
Neither of them were good choices for your people.
You flinch as a hand lands on your shoulder. You peek out from behind your veil and meet Stilgar's stern gaze.
"What you are doing right now is a profanation." He snorts at you, leading you through the crowd of people and away from the watchful eyes of the Harkonnen soldiers.
"At least I don't attract as much attention as I would without this outfit."
"Let's get out of here. Muad'dib will arrive soon. You'll see, he'll do everything right." He assures you as he leads you out of the market. You shiver as you feel the eyes of passersby on you.
You stumbled upon Stilgar a week ago by accident while travelling to the main city. Your original (crazy) plan was to sneak into the landing site and grab one of the less guarded ships. And a pilot of some sort. It's not like you've had a chance to learn how to fly those weird metal contraptions.
However, your plans changed after your conversation with him. He planned a coup with Muad'dib to get rid of the Harkonnens from the lands of Arrakis once and for all. And your... extraordinary abilities were not unknown to him. You were to help in overpowering the troops so that their messiah could get to the council chamber with his men.
It was supposed to be a quick and short action.
So of course it wasn't like that at all...
You manipulate the blood of the guards, quickly and silently stopping the Harkonnen hearts. Stilgar and Muad'dib and their men follow you through the fortress corridors. You stop only in the council chamber, where the Emperor and the new Baron of Giedi Prime were supposed to be.
But there is no one in the room.
A moment later, Harkonnen troops surround you. You reach out to use your powers, but the moment you try to manipulate the blood in the Harkonnen veins, an unimaginable wave of pain passes through you. You kneel, clutching your stomach, and take a few quick breaths, looking around the room. Your gaze falls on an old Bene Geserit, who is whispering something under her breath, playing with a stone in her hand—a moonstone.
As you writhe in pain on the floor, you are oblivious to everything around you. You feel like every fibre of your body has been burned by the sun, but there is nothing you can do to end your agony.
"One more move, and I will kill her!" Muad'dib screams, pulling you roughly by the hair and pressing his blade to your throat.
Bloody tears begin to flow from your eyes. All you can see is red, your lungs burn, and your breathing becomes too ragged for you to make any kind of threat. Besides, in this state, you have a pretty low level of intimidation.
"Put it down, Atreides... before you do something you will regret." You shiver as you recognise the voice of your soulmate.
"Then let us pass, and maybe I'll spare your bloody witch."
You knew that if they didn't come to an agreement, there would be a real massacre here. And maybe the Fremen seemed to be in a weaker position now, but everyone knew perfectly well that one of their warriors was worth six Harkonnens. But neither side could be sure of victory. After all, it happened more than once that the outcome of the battle was unexpected by both sides.
"You know this is non-negotiable. You're in no position to make demands on me… and she's not worth this much trouble."
"Is that why you chased her across half of Arrakis with your men?"
"It was while we were conquering more territories. I never said that this expedition was specifically dedicated to finding her. As far as I'm concerned, you can cut her sweet throat. My only regret will be that I wasn't the one holding the blade that would inflict her final wound." The man behind you tenses, his grip on your hair tightening in anger and the dagger at your throat twitching dangerously, causing a trickle of blood to leak from the small wound he’d inflicted on you.
"One word from me, and the Atreides' explosives around the spice mines will be destroyed. Including those around the stronghold. I may not get out of this unscathed, but I will drag you all with me to my grave."
"You're bluffing." The Emperor replies coldly, but you can sense the underlying fear in his tone. You didn't know Paul Atreides, but from the rumours about Muad'dib, you could tell he was unpredictable. He could lie just as easily as he could tell the truth. You don't know which was worse.
"Let her go and face me if you want to accomplish anything. As you said earlier: Enough blood has been spilt."
"Since when do you dislike bloodshed?" You can actually see the mocking smile on Muad'dib's face without even having to turn to face him.
"Since I'm not the one who's having the most fun with it." The silence and tension in the room become more noticeable to you than the searing pain in your insides. The tears have stopped falling from your eyes, but it still hurts to breathe. However, you've gotten used to the pain enough that your vision returns, and the blurs in front of you become real people. "Let's finally put an end to this. One-on-one. Winner takes all." The growl of your soulmate sends a cold shiver down your spine.
You weren't quite ready for what was to come, and though you saw flashes of visions of this duel, the outcome never presented itself to you. However, you felt that after this, nothing would ever be the same.
"Rautha..." The Emperor begins with a warning, but before he can finish his sentence and express his concerns, Atreides speaks first:
"I accept."
These two face each other, just like in your dream. Both prepare for battle and present their blades to the other with a mocking "May your knife chip and shatter." The fight begins; both of them deal equal blows to each other, but after a while you realise that it is not Harkonnen who emerges victorious.
The visions you had start to replay before your eyes. You know perfectly well that if you don't react, Feyd will die. And while you liked the idea before, now the thought makes you feel sick, and the pain in your chest only increases.
Suddenly, the sounds around you stop reaching you; all you can hear are the whispers of the Reverend Mother. And suddenly, before you know it, your soulmate scar opens up and begins to bleed. Only your blood isn't red—it's black. You bite your lip to hold back a scream and feel SOMEONE reach for your powers. You are forced to direct the blood in Harkonnen's body and stop the bleeding from the Atreides blade.
This gives Harkonnen enough time to launch a counterattack and deal the final blow to the Atreides.
You gasp in shock, unable to explain why your powers went out of control. Or why blood suddenly began to gush from your wrist. But before you lose consciousness and slump to the floor, you see the dead body of Muad'dib fall to the floor next to you.
As you expected, you wake up chained to a bed with a muzzle in your mouth. You try to break free from your bonds, but it's futile. All you manage to do is shake your chains and make a noise that attracts the attention of the bald Harkonnen's servants.
Five women surround you, trying to keep you in place. You scream and struggle, trying to push their hands away from you as the door swings open with a loud bang.
They freeze the moment Baron Feyd-Rautha enters the room.
He barks a few words at them in their language and waits for them to move away from you. You shiver as you are left alone in the room with him, completely at his mercy and whims. He takes a few slow steps towards you, watching you closely.
"I knew you'd look beautiful chained to the bed." He says teasingly and strokes your cheek with his ring finger.
You tremble under his watchful gaze, your heart beating like crazy, but when you reach for your powers to use them, you feel blocked. You hold your breath in shock as he continues to draw patterns on your cheek, moving lazily to your neck.
"Surprised? I'm a patient man. Very patient. As soon as I heard about your little special ability, I had to find out the source of it… and learn exactly how to control it so you wouldn't rip my heart out of my chest the moment we will be finally alone."
His hand slides down to your chest. You sigh as he cups your breast in his hand, massaging it slowly, digging his fingers into it. You hiss, but no sound comes through the gag. Harkonnen hums, sitting on the edge of the bed and leaning closer to you as he continues to abuse your breast through the material of the new clothes you don’t recognise and the blanket you’re covered in.
"Hmm… I think I'd rather hear those little sounds of yours." He says thoughtfully and leans towards you. His nose brushes against yours as you lie frozen beneath him. "And kiss those sinful, irritating lips."
Before you can react, he presses the dagger to your cheek. You shiver as the cold steel grazes your heated skin. Harkonnen takes his time. He plays with you, drawing patterns into your skin, drinking in every hitch in your breath, the quickening movement of your chest, and the look in your eyes as you give him one of your furious ones.
"It's amazing how even after having all your fangs pulled out, you don't lose your ferocity, my little, wild, dessert rose." He cuts your muzzle and removes it from you. You grunt and cough, feeling your throat become terribly dry, almost as dry as it was on Arrakis during the worst sandstorms.
He places a few pillows behind your back, moves you into a sitting position, and holds a glass of water to your lips. You have no choice but to drink, hoping that he doesn't intend to poison you since he went through so much time and effort to find and trap you.
His intense gaze pierces through you, and you wonder what is more uncomfortable—the chains around your wrists and ankles or his blue irises focused entirely on you.
As he places his glass on the table, you finally decide to speak to him.
"I see that I should have stabbed you harder." You growl, looking with distaste at how well he moves. His knee is practically healed.
"I see I should have tied you up tighter." He responds to your attack with equal venom.
"What did you do to me? What did your old hag do? Why don't I feel…"
"Take it easy, little warrior. You don't expect me to tell you my tricks before we get home, do you?" The blood is boiling in your veins. You have an irresistible urge to slow down his heartbeat and make him faint and hit his head on the floor, or better yet, some metal rod, but you don't feel anything. You can't manipulate the blood; you can't feel the hearts beating around you. And you feel so damn defenceless because of it.
"I am at home." You growl angrily, trying your best to fight back the tears that were dangerously starting to form in your eyes.
"No, you're not. Your home is where I am. Which is currently Giedi Prime. We'll land there in two days." You stiffen when you hear this. The knowledge that you're leaving Arrakis and that you'll likely never see your friends and father again hits you like a slap in the face.
"What do you think gives you the fucking right to…"
"As your husband and soulmate, I have the right to certain things." Now you freeze completely at his words. Husband? What the hell? What husband?
"What the fuck?"
"Language." He hisses at you and sits down next to you. He gently smooths your hair, and you catch the glint of a black wedding band on his finger. He smiles when he notices you see his newest piece of jewelry. "We'll have to work on that. Since you're a Baroness, a certain degree of… courtesy and manners is expected of you. But don't worry. I'll make sure you learn the skills you need quickly."
"I'm not your damn wife. Or your soulmate."
"Look at your left hand, my darling."
You reluctantly do as he tells you. You gasp in shock when you see that instead of the familiar scar, you have a black tattoo of his initials. And a huge ring on your ring finger. A matching ring to the one Harkonnen wore now.
"How..."
"A Bene Gesserit sister restored the link between our souls that you so brazenly severed. As a child, I believe. Tell me, were you that afraid of me, my love? Did you never even think for a moment that maybe you should get to know me before you try to destroy such a sacred connection?"
"You will pay for this... I swear you will." You vow to yourself and to him furiously, now only reassuring yourself that you were right about him all along.
"Two years with me, and I'll make sure you don't even think about hurting me, let alone running away from me. Besides, it'll be quite a task to run away with a baby on your breast, don't you think?" He whispers, leaning into you. You move to bite his nose, but unfortunately he pulls away before your teeth can even lightly graze his skin and chuckles darkly.
"Once I get my powers back, I'll make sure you die a long, slow death. You'll beg me to kill you." You growl through your teeth, giving him a hateful look.
He just smiles and strokes your jaw gently, treating you like you were a child who has a tantrum. You want so badly to break free from these chains and hurt him...
"Don't worry, honey. We have plenty of time to get to know each other. But let's get started, what do you think?" Before you can react, he straddles you and crushes his lips against yours.
You buck, trying to somehow throw him off balance and push him off of you, but he only tightens his grip on your arms and presses himself closer to you. His hips grind against yours, showing you all too well how lustfully he reacted to your little struggle with him.
He tangles his hand in your hair and pulls your head back, giving himself better access to your neck. He trails kisses from your lips, along your jaw, and down the column of your neck as he settles his attention on your collarbone. You bite your lip as he bites into you with a growl, much like a wolf gnawing at its prey.
"No lip-biting. I want to hear all the little sounds you make."
"Fuck off, psycho." You growl, struggling beneath him and trying to get away from him. He clicks his tongue at you and runs it along your neck, up to your ear, leaving a wet trail of saliva.
"Is that how you address your dear husband? Haven't these wild rats taught you anything?" He mocks you and pulls out his dagger. To your protests, he cuts your dress in half one swift movement, exposing your bare chest to him. You gasp, surprised when he immediately sucks onto your breast, nipping and teasing your nipple.
Your hands grip the sheets beneath you, and even though you hate him with all your heart, the sensations he's giving you are… more than pleasant. You blush as he slides between your legs and moves his mouth lower and lower.
"My beautiful soulmate and wife, I have waited for you for so long." He mumbles against your skin, brushing his plush soft lips against your breast. You clench your thighs, wanting to block his access to you, but it only stops him for a moment.
In one powerful movement, he spreads your legs and buries his head between your thighs. You cry out as he brutally sinks his teeth into your thigh, marking you and drawing your blood. He licks his lips with a groan, as if it were the sweetest nectar he'd ever tasted, and runs a finger over that new, sensitive wound, spreading your blood up your thigh and all the way up to where you were shamefully wet for him.
These sensations are even more intense than when you were dreaming. You don't know if it's because you now realise that this isn't just a dream and that he poses a real threat to you. You also feel... overwhelmed by emotions. Your desire is much greater, and for a moment it seems to you that your emotions are no longer really just yours...
You sigh as his tongue teases your soaked folds. You try to crush his head between your thighs, but that only seems to encourage him more. You moan as you feel his tongue reach parts of you that you didn’t think he could explore in this position.
Suddenly your hands are free. You pretend not to notice as he undoes the handcuffs on your hands. Your brain works at an incredible speed as you think about what you should do in this situation. Without your powers and weapons, you could do very little, chained to the bed.
He clearly wanted you to give yourself to him, to feel what he felt for you. You could play that game for a while—just until you got your powers back. Then maybe you could somehow escape from him again...
So instead of trying to strangle him, you dig your nails into the back of his head, pulling him closer to you with a soft moan.
He groans at the feeling of your hands on his head. He strokes your hips with his thumbs, drawing meaningless patterns. At least for you. Feyd unconsciously 'writes' various words in his language on your skin. Mainly: mine, wife, baroness, darling, etc.
He mumbles words against your cunt that you can't make out, but from the way he takes ragged breaths and grinds against the mattress beneath him, he's probably whispering hoarse curses in his native language.
You are so close to the edge that you no longer care who is between your legs. Well, at least as long as you are about to reach your blissful pleasure.
His fingers caress your aching core, teasing you as he gently slides the pad of his finger into your very empty pussy. But just as you’re about to reach your release, he pulls away from you, a wicked smirk on his lips as he does so.
"Delicious. Perhaps if you learn to respect your new husband, we can both enjoy this, my darling." He gets up from the bed. He licks his fingers, groaning in appreciation as he watches you closely.
You gasp, sweat dripping down your face as you try to understand why the hell you feel, in addition to immense frustration and anger, also... satisfaction and pride. You blink a few times, catching your breath as you look at him suspiciously.
"You'll see, I'll turn you into my beloved little wife…" He speaks in his native language, gently stroking your cheek and playing with your hair. You frown, unable to understand what he's saying.
You gasp as he suddenly turns and walks towards the entrance.
"Wait! You can't just leave me here like that!"
"Rethink your behaviour, honey. A good wife doesn't call her husband a psychopath. I'll see you in the morning. Sweet dreams, Y/N." You scream after him, throwing a pillow at him, but instead of hitting him, it bounces off the closed door behind him.
You groan in frustration, both at the loss of your orgasm and the fact that your ankles are still chained to the bed and you can't even go and grab a blanket to cover yourself with.
As you lie there, you wonder how you ended up here. He admitted to researching you, but how on earth did he manage to block your power? And why did your soulmate mark become a black tattoo again? What gave him the right to marry you when you were unconscious? And how the hell did he find out your name?
You realise you've grossly underestimated him. And now you have to pay the price. You sigh, closing your eyes and listening to your surroundings. The ring on your finger is a stark reminder of your defeat. Luckily, the war has only just begun. And this time, you'll play your cards a lot better.
#feyd rautha x reader#feyd rautha x you#feyd rautha x y/n#feyd rautha#feyd rautha harkonnen x reader#feyd rautha harkonnen#feyd x reader#feyd oneshot#house harkonnen#dune part 2#feyd rautha harkonnen x you#dark romance#romance#feyd rautha smut#soulmates#pinning#obsessive love#toxic behavior
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"𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒"
› 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 & 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐲 𝐡𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧. 𝐌𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐥 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐬 𝐯𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 ‹
𝆩 pick a cards 𝆩 paid services 𝆩 leave a tip
𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝟏, 𝟐, 𝟑,
𝟒, 𝟓, 𝟔
Hello lovelies, it’s been a while. I wanted to put in some effort and provide you guys with a good content that longer is than usual so I came up with this pick a card reading based on one of my paid services option that you can also purchase for a minimum price. I hope y'all like this and would love to hear what you think about it. Enjoy and I’m sending you lots of love your way! 🤎
ℒ 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐥 𝐧𝐮𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝟐𝟐𝟑𝟑 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 ℒ
— "the power of divine connection and a sign from the heavens that our inner wisdom can help us find our soulmate" —
— "love and your connection with someone is about to change for the better" —
𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞? As always meditate or close your eyes before looking at each picture. Trust your intuition and pick out a picture you feel the most drawn to.
𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫: this is a general reading which may or may not resonate with you. Take what resonates and leave out anything that doesn't. Feel free to choose another pile if you'd like.
𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟏 — 𝐜𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐞 & 𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦
♥︎ ♥︎
ℒ book the same reading as 'Soul calling' for 4€ from my enchanted door ⊂🍸⊃
♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎
How do I not think about you? I long for you. Is this what being in love feels like? I smile even though you’re not mine. It’s already late but I’m still looking at the ceiling, tossing and turning endlessly. I’m lying on my bed hugging someone’s smile feeling so restless until the morning. Can you see how foolishly I’m holding my face while smiling wide? Each night I’m dreaming of standing next to you in the pink spring sun. Time passes by quickly that I don’t even notice and brings me sorrow and nostalgia. I called your name softly, painted my own hope. A stream of emotions rushed inside me by the time I realized that I’m in love with you. I had to do something about it, don’t you think? But instead I’m still keeping it to myself as I have no one to share with. Insecurities are filling me up as to how you’d think of me and see me after you know. It’s sad but kind of funny. You know the stars in the sky are my only friends who listened to me babbling about a first love as beautiful as a dream. I don’t usually write but for the first time I’m finding myself fantasizing about writing you poems to confess my love for you. My feelings are overflowing for you that I even forget my hunger at the thought of you. I’m singing alone like a fool.
Can I hold your soft hands for once? I imagine about your rare eyes that are shining so brightly and looking up at me. Just thinking about this makes my heart beat so fast as if it’d explode. Turns out when we love someone even if it’s a one-sided love, even if I can’t let go, I still find myself laughing and smiling at 3 am. Just hug me, please hug me. Hug me in my dreams. Just that only already makes me crazy happy like you’re right beside me. My body is burning up for you, because of you. Like a fever how it seems like I'm with you. I’m about to write you some sweet verses and want you to name it. How would you name me too? I want you to call me names. Missing you, wanting you so much right now. Like crazy, what to do now? You keep making me go crazy. I can’t concentrate, my mind keeps wandering elsewhere. I’m always elsewhere. How much is it enough to be lonely filled with thoughts? Me stupidly loving you on my own, loving you to the point of not caring how much time and how many days have passed.
Love your eyes, love your lips and here I’m still denying it. My shy heart unreliably continues to beat the wrong heartbeats. More and more each day. My love for you grows each day. Want to hold those hands once. I’m letting myself immersing and getting lost in each soft and soothing verses describing you. Even the stars can understand how in love I am with you. You’re as beautiful as an angel. As if you’re an angel. My angel. If only…if only… What can I do? Please tell me. All these delusions and hallucinations are making me high. I’m love sick with you. Touch me, love me, kiss me if you can. Do anything to me just don’t do nothing. I’m tired of not having you but I can’t stop my greediness. Please look at me. Do you even notice me? Is this love? Can this be love? Who am I to not give in… You’re making me feel this type of way just for it to be nothing at the end. The more hurt I am, the more I want you though. My insatiable thirst for you tortures me. Please be mine. I’m here waiting for you.
Channeled songs:
• Like Crazy (English Version) — Jimin
© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ── all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, edit, alter, or redistribute my work. Plagiarism in any form is prohibited. Any illegal attempt to violate these terms will result in immediate legal action.
‹𝟹 leave like & re-blog if you love it!
𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟐 — 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐥 𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡 𝐡𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬
♥︎ ♥︎
ℒ book the same reading as 'Soul calling' for 4€ from my enchanted door ⊂🍸⊃
♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎
I should’ve known better. Can’t even pretend like I don’t want it again. You’re on my brain all the time. Thinking about what all we could do. You did something to me 'cause this doesn’t happen too often. Something that makes me look at you too often. And baby you can give it something. My heart, my mind and my body is saying…my mind and my body is saying…my mind and my heart is saying… I don’t know what it is. I can’t tell you what it is but you got me going crazy. I’m talking crazy. I need you right now. It’s the way that your body moves, your hands touch, your lips look, your gazes hypnotize me. Love me nice and slow baby. I want to feel all the love you’ve got for me. You make me wanna replay all of the things that you and I, we do. Baby come through my phone. Tell me how much you miss me, how much you want me and I’ll make it come true. Put it down on me. Look at what you make me wanna do. Drop everything and everyone for you. Got my feeling running on the loose, wild. This ain’t what I’m really used to but I like it. If it’s you I’m all yours. I’m all in.
Let me pull out this car for you. Let us go on a race but let’s make it long and slow. Are you ready for this marathon baby? Let me hear you say "pull it". Are you waiting to get some more? I want to hear it. Beg me, lovely cupcake. I want to see you on a whim. Can I see that look on your face? The one that would say "chase me". How you wanna play this, baby? Baby you can ride all the time. I want to be in trouble, how about you? Promise me you don’t trip cause I want it to last forever. Show me how good of a troublemaker you can be, baby. I think too often about you baby, let’s cuddle up afterwards. Tell me about your day while I softly kiss your neck. Truly love you, do you know how much I love you? It’s not just the s*x and how our body move together and collide. Just know that I’m serious with you. I still remember the moment you lit up in a smile or those moments when you show signs of jealousy. I will remember them forever until I’m still with you and beside you. Even if we’re apart my heart is still yearning and waiting for you. Your love changed me, calling and waking up my peace. I’m missing you. Funny just how many stories can be made out from us for all that we’ve experienced and those nights hoping for you, dreaming about you.
I don’t need much in life. Just need you to understand me and know that I always and will always love you because in me there is only you. You’re my only reason. Saving you thousands of heartfelt lyrics and poems. I would give you all the sunrays and cool breezes you need. You’ve awoken me, the glow in me so i’m trying to be an inspiration to you, your kind of inspiration. I will help you find a passion that’s more beautiful than that I have for you in my dream. Forget all those worries because I’ll be there and follow you like a shadow wanting to guide your steps on a long path with only us two. I wanna be in your arms. I think I’m under your spell cause every time I’m near you my heart starts to roll, I always want more. You’re my heaven and my hell but I won’t deny, I won’t be scared. We can head deeper, seeing what there is more to know. I won’t hear or see anything else other than your heartbeats next to mine. There’s no forgetting you. I won’t quit you, I can’t and I’m not gonna regret it. Lay me down, bare me naked. You can take away my heart. Feel my burning desire in me for you. You make me want to risk it all for you and I’ve made up my mind. I’m gonna take that risk and risk it all for you my baby.
Channeled songs:
• Quit (ft. Ariana Grande) — Cashmere Cat
PS. I literally heard this whole song while channeling their messages so I decided to include specific fragments of it in the reading. The song could be in some way significant for them/for you and/or for your connection whether this be a display of their current energy (for you) or the dynamic between you both OR it could just be that what they wanted to say match these lyrics a little too well 🤷🏻♀️
© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ── all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, edit, alter, or redistribute my work. Plagiarism in any form is prohibited. Any illegal attempt to violate these terms will result in immediate legal action.
‹𝟹 leave like & re-blog if you love it!
𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟑 — 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞
♥︎ ♥︎
ℒ book the same reading as 'Soul calling' for 4€ from my enchanted door ⊂🍸⊃
♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎
I do whatever you say. Do whatever you want me to. Baby I'm okay. You can break my heart in two. If your heart has been broken before, let me put it back for you. Look into my eyes, open up your mind. I won’t tell a lie, I won't make you cry. I won’t be someone to make you worry each night. You don’t have to stay up at night waiting for me 'cause I won’t come home late to you. Won't you hold my hand? It never felt so right for me. I need you here tonight. Whisper sweet nothings into my ear while I make you feel so good like you’re on cloud nine. I will take you to heaven. Won’t you answer me? It doesn’t really matter because I got plans to get to know you better. Baby let's make what we got here last forever 'cause I don't wanna let you go, never. Dearest darling I just wanna be the one to do you right. We're standing here looking at each other, baby, eye to eye. Baby, I hope that you're thinking about giving me a chance with you tonight. You know how to do it so well that I don't know if I could ever get enough.
You belong with me. We belong to each other. Every place you go, I’ll follow. I’d be there. Can you trust me? Whenever there’s a shadow in your heart I’ll talk to you before your heart sinks. When it appears I’ll come running to you. I told you I’ll be your rescue. I’ll come to your rescue. When your heart feels heavy I’ll lift it up for you. We don’t need to do anything. Let’s just not do anything. If you change your mind I’ll grab onto your waist. I will hold you tight enough for you not to be able to slip away. I want to embrace you and let you feel love. And if you’re okay with it I’ll kiss you hard and soak in your scent. I wanna fall asleep drenched with your warmth and softness. Wrap your head around my neck. I’ll hold your mind so you won’t have bad dreams. I’ll hold your body so you won’t think of anything else. When you lean onto me I can feel the cool breeze of yours blew over me. A beautiful melody passes through my ears. Morning with you…it’ll be beautiful. Just like magic how your body feels on mine.
The way you love is one of a kind. Your love is healing. I feel safe with you and you make me come every time. I’ll pat your head and kiss your forehead like aftercare. You’re the only person I ever think about, nobody else compares. I want to get to know every side of you. I’m going to sit at the table and dream. Just like this again. I want the night to come earlier. You make my days better. I want you to give me more once again. So I hope you’ll come into my arms again. What words can I use to describe you? My heart is too deep. Can you come inside my mind? Will I be able to rise in your heart? I live through you. I’ll hold your heart. I can be a safe haven, an anchor for you to feel secured and stable. I’ll ease your mind and make you feel good all the time. I’ll wait until the moment you say "I feel the same way as you". I’ll be your song. Or a reassurance. Anytime in your ears. It will stay until you fall asleep. Until I can see you telling me with a smile that you feel the same way…until then.
Channeled songs:
• Adore (ft. Ariana Grande) — Cashmere Cat
© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ── all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, edit, alter, or redistribute my work. Plagiarism in any form is prohibited. Any illegal attempt to violate these terms will result in immediate legal action.
‹𝟹 leave like & re-blog if you love it!
𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟒 — 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐞
♥︎ ♥︎
ℒ book the same reading as 'Soul calling' for 4€ from my enchanted door ⊂🍸⊃
♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎
Is it already too late? I can’t stop myself from losing you. Tell me if you still want me and if you still need me. If only I didn't let go of your hand… If only you didn’t waver and I didn’t let myself waver from all the unimportant outside noises that came in between us. If only we didn’t run away at that time, what could’ve been out of us now?… If only we didn’t hide our weaknesses that we didn’t want the other to see. If we were brave enough to show what we didn’t ask each other. If only we didn’t keep it in us, keep it to ourselves. Would something have changed if we locked lips and kiss passionately just like the first time? If only at that time we didn't act like we were okay. If only we haven’t tried to fight it and didn’t pretend like everything didn't hurt as if our love ain't worth the risk… If only the world wasn't so evil to us, didn't let us be weak because we were too used to being on guard and bear with everything. The cuts have not healed but we pretended to be strong, no longer knew how to cry. And if only I wasn't so paranoid that one day you would disappear. If only I weren't hung up on the fact… If only you had proven to me that I was the only one. If only you would show me that I was the only one for you and if only I trusted you, you trusted me, we trusted each other then would you still be by my sidе? Would we still be together? Still laugh when we hear and see each other's names? Then would we still be madly in love, madly love like the first day we come to each other? Like the first day we fell in love, like the first day we were together?
Nights when I laid awake to pray, when you were all I’m thinking of. Days when I promised that whatever happens, I will still love you. I promised you no matter what may happen, I’ll love you. If that were true, would we still be in love? If only at that time we didn't let go of each other's hands… I’m thinking about if only at that time we didn't run away and if only at that time we weren't like that. Maybe, maybe... If I didn’t let you go. If only you and I had stayed. If only we didn't go that way… But maybe everything had to happen like that so I could learn to love myself. It’s time I have to admit that I have always been lying to my heart. Because if you wanted to, you would, but you didn't. It’s time for me to realize that I’ve been lying to myself 'cause it was easy to see but you were running from me. I hate the way I made excuses for every time you were so heartless. I hate the way I defended you every time you were so thoughtless. I hate the way I always said I was ok when I was lonely. I hate that I acted like that. I hate the way I felt humiliated and drown in self-pity. Hate cruel public opinions, hate thinking about you so much. I hate how I kept thinking about you too often. Hate to keep silent, pretending like I don't care.
But I still feel bad, cause it’s not just you. I’ve also made mistakes many times too, please forgive me. You and I we both know, we were not perfect. I didn’t want to let you down. You know I'll never be perfect. I never want to see you hurting. Promised you things that are now just a fantasy, a dream, forgive me. Promises I couldn’t keep, forgive me. Had to walk away to heal myself, forgive me. Forgive me for shutting you out so I could hold me. Found a new love and I hope you’ll forgive me. Forgive me for allowing myself to receive a new love and taking care of myself. Learn how to take responsibility for my own emotions, forgive me. Appreciate all the things that I have, all that I have now, forgive me. I hope you can do that too. So that one day we can see each other again, go back to each other. So that one day we can come back to each other again, smile at each other when we meet eyes even if we are no longer madly in love like the first day we were together. But we can get to know each other again like from the start. No more fears or doubts like before. Maybe one day you’ll hold me tight. Maybe one day we’ll do it right. How do you feel?… about it? What do you think?… about it? How do you like it?…
I hope we can meet again. We’re bound to meet again. That’s what I think. Love is pain, love is forgiveness. Love is an experience, a journey and I hope there’s a silver lining to ours as well. I’m still with you…
Channeled songs:
• Lose you to love me — Selena Gomez • Back to you — Selena Gomez
PS. These songs can describe the dynamic & feelings of both parties towards each other so the songs can be relevant for both of you
Side note: I got told that the messages for this pile match a song called © "neu luc do" by tlinh. I didn’t know of it until now but that’s what I heard while channeling the respective messages. Since this pac is based on songs anyway, just like pile 2 where I heard one whole song and included fragments of it in the readings as they seem to be important and really specific based on it, here it could also be that the subject of these messages identifies with the song hence I picked up these "lyrics" from their mind. I didn’t and don’t at all intend to steal anybody’s work!
© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ── all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, edit, alter, or redistribute my work. Plagiarism in any form is prohibited. Any illegal attempt to violate these terms will result in immediate legal action.
‹𝟹 leave like & re-blog if you love it!
𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟓 — 𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞
♥︎ ♥︎
ℒ book the same reading as 'Soul calling' for 4€ from my enchanted door ⊂🍸⊃
♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎
Didn't say a word but I seem to know what you want. Just tell me, if it's not a miss, I might accidentally also like it. Don't look at me as if it’s something new like the first time when everywhere in this body you’re already used to. If you’ve already forgotten then I have an idea… what about we get to know each other again so you can get used to it again? I like your vibe, you know I’m a fan. I like your style and what you wear. I bet you’d look good even in mine but i don't like them on you or me tonight. I might like it better if I can trace your line and paint your silhouette on me. So you don’t need your clothes on anymore. I want to take a look inside you. Let’s strip them clothes down for me. I don’t need any clothes on let’s just strip them down together. We don’t need them clothes at all, our bodies intertwine together would be enough. I won’t let you wait, let’s take off our clothes. No need for anyone to wear anything tonight. You might keep on that thong when we get passionate and so in love. If you like that babe, that thong can stay. Promise you can have access to every inch of me, darling. Show me devotion when we devote oneself to each other. You know you always get my special treatment.
You keep me so connected to you darling. One touch of me can give you the answers to all your questions. Don’t let anything get in between us 'cause this is what we’ve been waiting for so long. I’m gonna treat you right. Open up your mouth when I put my lips on you. Kiss me deeply while I savor every taste of yours. We can be reckless, restless until the morning. No way it’s too much for me. Wanna make you cry for me. Darling, cry for me. You know you turn me on like no one does. I know you like to show so shine for me. Darling you’re my main character. My absolute no. 1 private dancer. No one gets to finish when both are so stubborn. You know me and I know you. How come I met someone like you? You’re a keeper, a good catch and everything I’m looking for. For you I won’t bottle things up. For you I want to be honest. You deep down know we are made for each other, right? I want to make your heart smile. To have you is like to have the stars. You’re absolutely beautiful and adorable. You shine like the moon at night. You shine on me with empathy and care. I’m never alone with you.
I know you’re rare and precious that’s why I want to love you right. You know by time you should be in my arms right now. I’ll hold you like I can’t let go. I’ll keep you safe and sound. Treat you soft and gently. To love and be with you is like to dance with the stars. Do you want to fly away with me where it’s only us two? My treasure, with you I am me. Call me and say my name so I can make you my baby and show you real love. I’mma show you how to love. It feels like I’m seeing fireworks for the first time when I see you. Your body speaks to me, I can’t hide it. I’ll go down on you and take you places. Turn off the light. Tell me babe how you want it, you decide. Darling get ready 'cause you won’t be disappointed.
Don’t you know that You and I are the infinite symbol that equals forever? Turn it around and forever has the same meaning as you’re the love of my life.
Channeled songs:
• Energy — BURNS, A$AP Rocky & Sabrina Claudio
© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ── all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, edit, alter, or redistribute my work. Plagiarism in any form is prohibited. Any illegal attempt to violate these terms will result in immediate legal action.
‹𝟹 leave like & re-blog if you love it!
𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟔 — 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 & 𝐡𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬
♥︎ ♥︎
ℒ book the same reading as 'Soul calling' for 4€ from my enchanted door ⊂🍸⊃
♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎
Do you see the temperature increasing? Heart beats faster because you walk in. My ribcage increases and my lips are shaking. This body doesn’t seem like me whenever near you. When you touch my skin lightly, that feeling, no one can do that. No one can compare, I hope you know that. It must be that scent, must be that shoulder and those contacts. Oh am I not the luckiest? No need to say much I think you know. If you want to be pampered, i’ma make it work for you. Lightly tinged the room with the color of love. I want you to hold me tight and don't let me go. Love me right. You make me feel so high. You are only allowed to be like this with me alone. I’m losing myself in this moment with you. No in every moment with you. I will take you all the way to Cali. Maybe you can call me daddy/mommy/yours. Come to me. With me here there’s nothing you have to be worried about. (beep beep beep) do you hear the sound of my temperature rising? (trip trip trip) my hands are tighter again.
Hypocrite I know, I pretend to be indifferent but do you know that under all the masks that I’m wearing to hide my true self, I act wild and crazy for you? I’m freaking out but I like how you make me freak out. I like the feeling how you can make me act out of my usual self. Let’s forget about all our characters and drop all the manners. Just say how you want it sweetheart, I can take you there. Let me show you how my body yearns for you. I want to do this only to you. We can be freaky, kinky and nasty, whatever you like. Foreplay with you, there is really no way around it. One of my utmost favourite things to do might be to fill you up to the brim. You do things to me that I never imagined. I wanna show you how I get down. I’ll kiss every inch of you and run my hands up and down your entire body. Do you want to feel it? I know you want me and so do I. I might as well steal you from you. Get down with me. I just want to steal your heart and sneak an arm around your waist and claim you as mine. You’re my simple pleasure, just like the breeze on my face or the fragrance of flowers. Tell me if i ever cross your mind then I’ll tell you how I want us to be each other’s guilty pleasure everyday. Sweetheart you got the sweetest heart I’ve ever seen or felt before. Keep your lips tight only for me. I know you like to dream so let’s make our dream a beautiful place where we pour out our intimacy for each other and slowly reveal a little bit of our heart’s desire and secrets to each other. I’m totally enamoured by you.
You’re so delicate. I want to love all of you. I want to be your protector. I want to take care of you. My heart longs for a beautiful soul like you. There is telepathy between our hearts. I only want to make you smile and laugh all the time because then I’ll be happy when you’re happy. I want to mold myself into you. I want our souls to be one. I will look you in the eyes and make you feel seen for who you’re meant to be. Like for the first time I will make you feel like everything is alright. I can be that soothing energy you’re looking for. I want to give you all of me. You’re my remedy. I couldn’t ask for more. I feel your energy with me often. My world is being shaken up by you. Do you want me the way I want you? I want to declare my love for you. You know the saying "There will be a day when we meet our own version on someone else" and I think I’ve found me in you. My desire is you and only you. From the bottom of my heart, i want you to know that you are the one i have been waiting for, the missing piece that completes my soul. You know how to make me fall for you just like that. I want to love you for who you are. I will do that because that’s how I love myself and accept my flaws so I can give you the same thing as well. I will learn how to love you wholeheartedly. I’ll understand all of your flaws. Will you let me in? You’re special. If you’re going through some rough patches just know that experiencing things that you don't want makes you clear about what you do want so keep going. I’m here cheering you on.
Channeled songs:
• Honesty — Pink Sweat$
© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐜𝐫𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ── all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, edit, alter, or redistribute my work. Plagiarism in any form is prohibited. Any illegal attempt to violate these terms will result in immediate legal action.
‹𝟹 leave like & re-blog if you love it!
#crystaldivination#pac#pick a card#pick a card reading#pac reading#tarot community#tarotblr#tarot reading#intuitive readings#free readings#free tarot readings#free intuitive readings#pick a pile#Spotify#SoundCloud
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pepper & felix
part ten
its tiiiiiime
MASTERPOST word count: 4.3k
Felix’s breath hitched, his grip on his tea mug slipping.
Tea splattered over the counter as he fumbled to catch it, his heart pounding against his chest. He froze, listening intently for any noise in his otherwise silent kitchen.
Someone had said his name.
It… it couldn’t have been his soulmate. That would be impossible.
“Felix? Can you hear me?”
Cold shock tightened around Felix’s chest, and he blinked rapidly, thoughts racing, trying to wrap his mind around what was going on. He snapped his hands up to his chest, feeling the thrumming of his heartbeat, and tuned into the fuzziness in the back of his mind.
“You… you just said my name.” His words were blank and abrupt, mind racing with thoughts that were too incoherent to form into any reasonable sentence.
His soulmate paused for so long that Felix thought he might have imagined the whole thing; then, suddenly, the timid voice returned.
“I’m— I’m so sorry.”
Felix blinked in confusion. “Why—”
“I’m a borrower.”
The earth stopped spinning.
Felix froze.
“I’m— I’m your borrower. You know me.”
The air was suddenly gone from Felix’s lungs. He struggled to breathe as cold electricity struck his body, crackling and burning and destroying his insides, and he felt as if he might collapse. He was vaguely aware of the warm tea spreading onto the counter, where his mug had been knocked over by his numb, frozen hands.
Memories skipped around his mind, laughing and taunting him. He recalled the feeling of tiny boots wobbling in his palm, and how lightweight they had seemed despite the fact that they were supporting the weight of an entire person. He thought about how wide those gray eyes had been the first night he saw them, on the very counter his tea was now spilling onto. Those had been his soulmate’s eyes.
The air was stagnant as Felix clasped his hands and pressed them to his chest. His heart pounded against his palms; hopeful, terrified, angry.
“...Pepper.”
It wasn’t a question. The chaos in his mind was beginning to quell, dissolving into a cold realization that shook him to his core.
Pepper.
Pepper is my soulmate.
Felix wanted to throw something. He wanted to deny it, wanted to move away and pretend he never met Pepper. He wanted to cheer and hold Pepper against his chest and fall asleep on the couch together, wanted to walk down the street with Pepper on his shoulder and watch the sunset with him. He wanted to cry. He wanted an explanation.
“Felix, I’m so– I’m so sorry that I didn’t tell you before.” Pepper’s mental voice was shaking as he struggled to sort out his thoughts, stumbling over his words. “But, please— we need help. Please.”
“What?” Felix stood up a little straighter at that, his gaze flickering to the toaster, as if he expected to see Pepper approach.
“Alice found me and my sister, and— and she took us.”
Cold panic rocketed through Felix’s body like electricity.
“Wh-what?”
“We’re in her apartment, I— I think—?”
Felix was already across the kitchen, throwing on a coat and scrambling for his car keys. The kitchen appeared to be collapsing around him, but Felix didn’t care, adrenaline overtaking his actions.
“I didn’t want— I’m sorry that I had to tell you this way, I— I—“
“Pepper.” Felix slapped his hands to his chest, cutting the borrower off. “We’ll talk later. Sit tight. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes, okay?”
“…Okay.” Pepper’s voice sounded smaller than ever.
—
Rapid, thundering knocks sounded throughout the kitchen, and both borrowers flinched. Pepper’s stomach dropped into the floor below, and he sat up straighter inside the jar, holding his breath.
To his left, Basil hugged herself. “Is that him—?”
“Alice!” Someone shouted through the door, and Pepper sucked in a sharp breath.
“Yeah,” he muttered to Basil, heart thudding.
Felix knocked again, much louder and more determined. Both borrowers scrambled to their feet at the sound of footsteps approaching– then suddenly Alice appeared in the kitchen doorway, rubbing at her eyes. A moment passed in which she frowned down at the borrowers, contemplative, before she walked to the front door and peered through the peephole.
She immediately opened the door once she recognized her unexpected guest. “Felix?”
“What the hell?” Felix spat, and the back of Pepper’s neck tickled.
Felix seemed, well… angry. His eyes were flashing dangerously as he towered over Alice, seeming much taller than usual as he glared down at the shorter girl. Pepper had never seen this side of him before.
Alice jerked back, eyes widening. “Um— what—? Is everything okay?”
Pepper's heart raced, leaning closer. Despite the fact that the amount of humans in the room had just doubled, the borrower felt significantly more hopeful for his and Basil’s safety. If the humans’ voices weren’t so overpowering, Pepper would have considered calling out to Felix.
“Did you take them?” Felix demanded. Alice stepped back, wavering.
“You… you mean those little guys?”
Felix’s eyes widened at her words, shock and betrayal crossing his face. “So you did.”
“You knew about—?”
Felix shoved past Alice into the kitchen, making the shorter girl stumble in surprise. Pepper’s stomach flipped.
Pepper felt significantly unprepared to have Felix’s gaze on him. The moment Felix locked eyes with Pepper, the borrower’s heart jumped, and he instinctively inched closer to Basil, who was frozen.
Tension filled the air. Pepper’s heart rate quickened, suddenly remembering that Felix knew. Felix knew that they were soulmates, and that Pepper had intentionally withheld that information until he was all but forced to disclose it.
For the first time ever, Felix knew that he was looking at his soulmate.
However, Felix didn’t acknowledge a thing. Relief immediately washed over his face upon catching sight of the borrowers, and he stepped closer, leaning down to see better. “There you are.”
He still towered over the borrowers, but it was easier to see his face from this angle. Felix’s gaze softened as he examined Pepper, then switched his gaze to Basil, eyebrows lifting as he took in the sight of Pepper’s sister.
Basil made a small noise of surprise, inching back, while Pepper was frozen. It suddenly felt as if he couldn’t breathe.
Felix’s soft blue gaze slowly sharpened, glancing between the two borrowers. Something cold and foreign settled over his expression, making Pepper’s stomach twist in alarm.
Tension followed Felix’s movement as he turned towards Alice, who was still lingering near the door.
“What the fuck did you do to them?” Felix snapped, and Pepper’s stomach dropped, staring dumbfounded up at his soulmate.
Alice blinked rapidly, glancing between Felix and the borrowers several times. Her face had gone pale. “...What? You– What?”
“They’re hurt!”
Fire surrounded Felix’s voice, bright and livid. Pepper was suddenly all too aware of the strength underneath Felix’s massive form, boiling with white-hot anger. The amount of sheer power in front of him made Pepper’s heart pound, and he took an uncertain step back, hugging himself.
At Felix’s words Basil held a hand to her face, covering her bruise, and when she glanced at Pepper, her shoulders were tense. Alarm bells were going off in Pepper’s mind, but he ignored them and moved closer to his sister. “It’s okay,” he assured her, although his heart was still racing. “He’s gonna help.”
Alice’s gaze snapped briefly to the borrowers. “They– they were sneaking around your apartment!” Her voice was aghast. “They wouldn’t cooperate, so I had to put them in a jar–”
“They wouldn’t cooperate–?” Felix’s voice rose, and he cut himself off, taking a deep, furious breath. “They’re people, Alice, what the fuck is wrong with you?”
Alice sputtered in protest as Felix whirled around again, reaching for the borrowers. The sudden approach of a hand made Pepper flinch in surprise, especially once he remembered that the hand was connected to a very angry human. Basil gasped, grabbing into Pepper, and for once Pepper didn’t have any comforting words for her.
Felix paused for a moment, gaze calculating. He leaned down to see them better. “I’m gonna open this up, okay?” His voice was firm, his eyes still dark and fiery.
Basil seemed unable to speak, so Pepper forced himself to respond for the both of them.
“Okay.” His small voice wobbled.
Five massive fingers closed around the jar. When Pepper glanced over, Basil’s eyes were squeezed shut.
“What are you doing?” Alice asked, shocked, as Felix began to unscrew the lid. “You’re letting them out?”
Felix closed his eyes briefly, taking a deep breath to steel himself. He ignored Alice and continued, setting the lid down on the counter before meeting Pepper’s gaze. “I’m gonna tilt the jar on its side now,” Felix explained, his usual softness beginning to return to his voice. Pepper nodded again mutely, unable to look at the enormous hand around him.
He and Basil stood up straighter as the glass slowly tilted around them, a shocking display of Felix’s strength. They both wobbled, throwing out their hands and stumbling along, until finally the jar was on its side. Pepper paused at the opening and grabbed onto Basil’s hand.
He didn’t feel entirely comfortable leaving the jar until Felix withdrew his hand and gave them space. Swallowing thickly, Pepper took a small step onto the counter, while Basil did the same. They huddled near each other, feeling smaller than ever as they faced down the two humans in front of them, with no protection. Neither of them dared to speak.
Felix’s gaze lingered on Basil, flickering over her small form. “Hi,” he said gently, voice quieter than before. “I’m Felix.”
Basil’s grip tightened on Pepper’s hand, terrified to be directly addressed by a human. She opened her mouth like she intended to speak, but choked, choosing to shakily nod up at him instead.
Felix’s blue gaze shifted to Pepper, and the borrower stiffened, staring up at him. The room suddenly felt too quiet.
As if to rub salt in the wound, Alice spoke up and said, “How did you know they were here?”
Panic struck Pepper’s lungs like electricity, taking his breath away. He snapped his gaze to Alice, watching her eyes narrow.
“That doesn’t matter,” Felix said dismissively, and Pepper’s heart fluttered in relief. “We’re leaving.”
“You– you’re what?”
Felix turned and met Alice with a furious glare. “I’m taking them back home. You had no right to fucking kidnap them.”
“Kidnap–?!”
“Yes, Alice, you kidnapped them and then hurt them!” Felix’s voice was vicious, and he gestured to the borrowers, eliciting a microscopic flinch from the both of them. “Look at this girl’s face– she’s bruised because you decided to be an asshole!”
Alice turned to the borrowers in alarm, eyes wide. “What? She– I didn’t mean to–”
“We’ll talk about this later,” Felix snapped, turning back towards the borrowers, who had backed several inches away. Pepper’s knees were shaking so much he could barely stand, clutching to Basil’s equally shaky arm.
The human took a deep breath, peering at them both. “Are you guys okay? Can I carry you out?”
In Pepper’s peripheral vision, Basil shifted closer to him, her face pale. Pepper swallowed and spoke up for the both of them.
“Yeah– yeah, that’s okay,” he responded levelly, trying to calm his pounding heart. “Thank you.”
Felix nodded, then reached towards them. The sight of his massive hand approaching made Pepper’s insides turn to liquid, and he fought the urge to back away, feeling Basil stiffen next to him. When the enormous hand landed face-up an inch away from them, Pepper released a nervous breath, taking a step closer.
Tension tugged at his arm, and he glanced to see Basil frozen on the countertop, brown eyes wide and dilated. Her voice was terrified when she whispered, “I can’t. I can’t do this.”
Pepper blinked rapidly, all too aware of the humans’ eyes on them. He had nearly forgotten that Basil had never been carried by a human before… at least, not willingly.
He stepped closer, clutching her arms. “It’ll be okay,” he whispered, heart racing. “I promise. I know it’s scary, but– but we’re gonna get out of here and then you’re never gonna have to interact with a human ever again.”
Basil blinked rapidly, sparing a quick, petrified look at the humans before swallowing hard. “I…” Her voice wobbled, barely audible. “Okay. Okay.” She took a breath, squeezing her eyes shut. “Okay.”
Pepper was immensely grateful that Felix was being patient with them. The human waited as Basil pulled herself together, her voice quiet and shaky as she mumbled to herself, clutching Pepper’s hand.
Somehow, Basil being nervous helped to quell some of Pepper’s fears. When she finally nodded that she was ready, Pepper gently guided her towards Felix’s hand, choosing to take the first step onto the palm himself. Immediately, Felix’s thumb twitched, and Pepper had to suppress a flinch.
His stomach continued to do flips as he stepped fully onto Felix’s hand, wobbling on the soft surface. He refused to look at Felix.
Basil’s eyes shut the moment she stepped onto Felix’s hand, and she grabbed onto Pepper, releasing a tense breath through her teeth. Slowly and carefully, the two borrowers sat down on Felix’s massive palm, clinging to each other. Pepper was uncomfortably aware of how both of them could fit in one hand.
They were tiny.
“I’m gonna move now,” Felix warned. He waited a moment for them to adjust before slowly lifting his hand off of the counter, making both borrowers freeze up instinctively. Basil began to mumble again, reciting comforting mantras to herself, eyes shut tight.
Alice was at a loss for words. Her blue eyes were wide as Felix turned towards the door, the two borrowers held carefully to his chest.
“Bye, Alice.” Felix barely looked at her as he swung open the front door. Alice stuttered something in response, but the door had already slammed shut behind them, reverberating through Pepper’s body. He swallowed.
Felix took a few steps, then stopped, leaning against the wall of the hallway. He took a long, deep breath, briefly bringing his free hand to his face. Silence fell for over the three of them.
Pepper shared a nervous glance with Basil before he peered up at Felix. “Felix– thank you,” he said shakily, relief flooding into his body as he processed that they were no longer trapped in Alice’s apartment. The pain of the evening had shaken him to his core. “I don’t– I don’t even know what to say. Thank you.”
A long moment passed as Felix closed his eyes, steeling himself. Pepper’s stomach crawled with apprehension.
Felix finally spoke, still refusing to look at them. “Are you two okay?” He asked, ignoring Pepper’s gratitude. “I saw some of the bruises, but– is anything broken?”
Pepper and Basil glanced at each other. Pepper focused on the aching pains in his joints, and the pain of the bruises covering his body– but there didn’t seem to be any permanent damage, fortunately. After a moment of consideration, Pepper answered, “Um… no, I don’t think so. We’re okay.”
The human’s shoulders dropped, relief flooding his form. “Good… good.” He swallowed, then began to walk down the hallway, momentarily throwing Pepper off balance. “I can’t believe it… I never would have thought Alice would do something like this,” he admitted hollowly.
Pepper chewed his lip and elected not to respond just yet. His mind was elsewhere.
Felix had yet to mention the soulmate situation. He had barely acknowledged Pepper any differently than usual, and Pepper wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not.
Pepper fiddled with his blue sleeves as Felix began walking down the hallway. “It’s my fault,” Pepper said definitively, a frown crossing his face. “I got– I got overconfident. I didn’t think Alice would see us.”
“She shouldn’t have kidnapped you two, though,” Felix said darkly, cradling them against his chest as he opened the doors to the apartment complex, revealing a parking lot illuminated by moonlight. Pepper blinked up at the purplish night sky, suddenly fascinated. He had forgotten it was so late.
Basil didn’t appear to be as entranced by the stars as much as her brother. She swallowed, placing a steady hand on the massive chest behind them, and suddenly spoke to Felix for the first time. “Thank you. For– for rescuing us.”
Felix blinked down at her. “It’s okay,” he murmured, and Basil nodded, face pale.
Pepper and Basil both tensed as Felix suddenly opened the door of a small, gray car. He held them carefully as he slid into the driver’s seat, albeit awkwardly, and shut the door behind them.
“This might be loud,” Felix warned.
“We know,” Pepper muttered, too quiet for Felix to hear.
The roar of the engine made both borrowers jump, but it quickly dissolved into background noise. Felix paused, eyes calculating as he surveyed the space around him. “You guys okay with sitting on the passenger seat? I’ll drive slow.”
Pepper and Basil shared a glance. Neither of them showed any indication that they knew what a “passenger seat” was.
“Yeah,” Pepper said finally. “That’s fine.”
–
The front door clicked shut behind Felix as he entered the kitchen, flipping the overhead light on with his free hand. The exhaustion of the evening was weighing on all three of their shoulders, leaving them in an uneasy silence, broken only by the sounds of Felix’s footsteps. Felix's hand wavered as he lowered the borrowers to the kitchen counter, and he tried not to be too uncomfortable with how easily two entire people fit in the palm of his hand.
Pepper stepped off first, followed by the female borrower. Her hand was clasped tight in her brother’s, and she wobbled as she hit the counter, as if she wasn’t used to standing on the soft skin of a human hand. Felix could only assume that she wasn’t.
It was hard not to stare at her, and at the dark bruise that covered a large portion of her face. The miniscule details of her facial features were harder to discern under the bruise, but Felix could definitely tell that she was related to Pepper, indicated by the similar slope of their noses and cheekbones. He wondered briefly if she had always lived in this apartment, too.
“Are you guys doing okay?” Felix asked cautiously, and both borrowers twitched. The tension in their shoulders was clear, and it broke Felix’s heart. Once again he found himself furious with Alice, that she would intentionally scar two defenseless people. Would they be able to recover?
“Yeah,” Pepper answered softly, glancing at his sister. She had barely said a word since Felix found them, and Felix prayed that she wouldn’t be too traumatized from the whole experience. His stomach flipped at the idea that somebody could be so scared of him. “I– I’m just happy to be home,” Pepper continued with a weak sigh, dragging his hands down his face. “I can’t thank you enough, Felix.”
Felix nodded. His gaze flickered over Pepper’s small form, and his heart twisted, a flutter of unease finding its way into his body. “Don’t thank me,” he murmured. “It was fucked up for Alice to take you. I’m so sorry.”
Pepper’s sister shifted on her feet, peering uneasily up at Felix through her dark lashes. “What if– what if she tells other humans about us?” She noticeably tensed when Felix turned his attention to her, but continued hesitantly, “We’re supposed to be a– a secret.”
Felix had to lean in a bit to hear her, uncomfortable by how shaky her voice was. It wouldn’t be absurd to assume that this might be her first time interacting with humans, ever. Sympathy flooded into his heart for the girl.
A frown crossed Felix’s features at her words. He hadn’t considered that Alice might share her discovery with other people… in which case, the borrowers’ secret would be broken.
“I’ll talk to her tomorrow,” Felix decided after a moment, chewing his lip. “I really don’t think she’ll tell anyone, but if she does, I doubt they’ll believe her.” Pepper and his sister nodded.
Felix couldn’t fight the feeling that Pepper was avoiding his gaze. The borrower was playing with the sleeves of his blue jacket, face turned down, shifting on his feet like he wasn’t sure if he should stay or leave.
After a moment of consideration, Felix addressed the female borrower, trying to keep his voice soft and polite. “You should probably go rest,” he told her, and she blinked owlishly. “Is it okay if I talk to Pepper alone, for a bit?”
Pepper stiffened, but stayed silent. His sister sent him a sideways glance, a curious expression crossing her face, and she nodded up at Felix.
“Yeah,” she said, a warmer tone filling her voice. “Thank you again, for everything.”
She whispered something to Pepper, far too quiet for Felix to decipher. A minute later she had vanished, disappearing behind the toaster where Felix knew a hidden exit was, and Pepper and Felix were alone. Silence fell over the two of them.
Felix opened his mouth to speak, but suddenly found himself at a loss for words. Pepper was still refusing to look at him, a behavior that made Felix’s stomach twist.
“...Want to move to the couch?” Felix offered after a moment, placing a hand face-up next to the borrower.
Pepper’s gray eyes blinked, and his voice wobbled when he responded, “Yeah… yeah.” He only hesitated for a second before stepping up onto Felix’s palm, hugging himself. Felix made sure to walk carefully when he moved to the living room, not wanting to inflame any injuries Pepper might have endured.
They receded to their usual positions; Felix sitting sideways on the cushion, while Pepper sat cross-legged on the back of the couch. The ghostly feeling of tiny boots on Felix’s palm was hard to ignore, and he ran his hand over the length of his forearm.
Pepper, surprisingly, was the first one to speak. “Felix…” His breath hitched and he closed his eyes, voice breaking. “I should have told you. I’m sorry.” He drew his knees close to his chest, wrapping his arms around them. He looked absolutely miniscule.
Felix hesitated. “How long have you known?”
Pepper avoided his gaze again. “For… for a while. Since we’ve met.”
Oh.
Felix blinked rapidly, brow furrowing. Pepper had known this entire time that they were soulmates?
He thought back to everything his soulmate had told him… that he enjoyed sewing, that he had a sister. Considering how little his soulmate had been willing to share about his life, Felix wasn’t sure how he hadn’t noticed before.
Pepper’s expression was hard to make out in the darkness of the room. A singular orange lamp illuminated the space, casting shadows over the walls, and Pepper looked smaller than ever. The miserable glint in the borrower’s eyes, however, was indisputable.
“I…” Felix couldn’t vocalize his thoughts. He hadn’t known that borrowers even had soulmates, let alone that they can overlap with humans. As much as it hurt to know that Pepper had intentionally withheld this information, there was a small part of his mind that understood. Looking at Pepper, Felix found himself under an onslaught of confusion and fear, and if he had been in Pepper’s place he wasn’t sure how he would have handled it. “I didn’t know that was possible,” Felix finally said, peering closer. “For a human and a borrower to be soulmates.”
“Me neither,” Pepper said instantly, shoulders slumping. “I… I wanted to tell you, I did, but– but it’s just–” He waved his arms out uselessly. “I’ve never even talked to a human before you, and– and it just felt like… too much.”
Felix nodded slowly. He supposed that an unbreakable bond with a human would be unsettling for a borrower who had spent their whole life fearing humans.
“...Your sister’s probably not happy, huh?” He asked teasingly. “How does she feel about it?”
A smile crossed Pepper’s face at the mention of his sister, and he relaxed microscopically. “Well… she’s not the biggest fan of humans,” he explained. “When I told her that we’re soulmates, um… she didn’t take it that well. But, she’s starting to come around… especially now that you kind of saved our lives.” He raised his eyebrows pointedly.
Felix chewed his lip at that, contemplative. “Speaking of that… Alice didn’t hurt her too much, did she? I couldn’t help but notice the, um, bruise on her face. Is she okay?”
Pepper’s features softened. “She definitely got the worst of it, but she’s tough as hell. She’s gonna be okay. Don’t worry.” His lips twitched into a smile.
“Good.” Felix fought the urge to ask if Basil lived here, too. That question could wait.
The human took a deep breath, then spoke again, lowering his voice somewhat. “Listen, Pepper, about us being soulmates… I’m sorry that you were forced to tell me before you were ready.” His voice softened, watching as Pepper’s gray eyes focused on him. “I’m… well, I’m surprised that we’re soulmates, and… I’m not really sure where to go from here… but it’s okay. I’m not upset about it.”
Pepper blinked, his shoulders twitching. “You’re not?”
“I do like you,” Felix continued gently. “I think I understand how the universe decided that we’re soulmates. There’s definitely a lot to figure out between us, but… I’m at least happy to call you my friend. This doesn’t change anything.”
A flush crossed Pepper’s face, and the borrower nodded, leaning closer. “I– I’m glad,” he expressed, eyes wide. “I don’t want things to change.”
“I do wish that I could’ve found out in a less stressful way, though,” Felix added, amused, and Pepper snorted.
“Yeah, sorry about that,” Pepper mused. “That definitely wasn’t the most romantic way to tell you.”
Felix made a noise of surprise, flushing, and Pepper laughed. “I’m just kidding.” The borrower pushed himself to his feet, eyes twinkling. “I should probably go check up on my sister, now– but I’ll talk to you tomorrow?”
Felix blinked rapidly, a warm feeling in his chest. “Yeah.” He smiled. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
---------
eeeeeeeeee finally !!!!!
thank you so so much for reading!! comments/reblogs are always appreciated (i thrive off them) :D
TAGLIST: @smallsday @compact-katrina @satethesatelite @taters169 @entomolog-t
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silence | c.sc
seungcheol x gn!reader
small drabble :)
wc: ~280
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nights with seungcheol aren’t always adventure and mischief. in fact, for the most part, they’re full of love and comfort in your shared apartment. there’s something about him. he gets you completely. some might say he’s your other half, your twin flame, soulmate, etcetera. but neither of you have ever spoken about that. mostly because neither of you have to say anything when it comes to your relationship.
for some reason, it all just works, even without an exchange of words. the two of you move in tandem. you’re made for each other.
seungcheol’s larger body slots behind yours in bed, clutching you close. he splays his fingers across your chest, tracing hearts along the ridges of your ribcage. he leaves warmth in his wake, becoming your own personal heater during the frigid winter. despite the icy temperature of his hands, still damp from washing his face, his fingertips ignite your heart and draw affectionate nuzzles from you.
normally, this would be the time for heartfelt discussions and soft pillow talk, but there’s none of that between the two of you. you can hear his steady heartbeat behind you. his breathing grows deep with sleep. his fingers gradually slow their movements, eventually stilling at the center of your chest, slightly to the left, where your lifeline matches the pace of his own.
there’s comfort in the silence. the lack of words, the subtle shuffle of the sheets, the pitter-patter of kkuma's nails against the floorboards, and the soft buzz from the heater of the home you’ve built together. there’s never pressure to fill the sonic emptiness, instead replaced by the fullness of your hearts as you drift off in each other’s arms.
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The Glass Coffin: HOFAS x Elriel
Many HOFAS spoilers ahead!! This is an INTENSIVE post on all the Elriel coding in HOFAS, so strap in! This is largely a theory post and my personal interpretations, so take it or leave it! It's all in good fun.
Let's start with The Glass Coffin. When it comes to the analysis of the songs Bryce played for Azriel and Nesta in the much beloved and much dissected bonus chapter, I have seen a lot of conversation around Stone Mother and significantly less (if any?) around The Glass Coffin!
The Glass Coffin is played next after the Stone Mother. And it is a ballet.
What is the The Glass Coffin?
My friends, it is Sleeping Beauty.
Now we all know that many suspect Elriel to be a Sleeping Beauty retelling. And I'll be honest, I take a lot of the mythology or "retellings" with a grain of salt when it comes to SJM, because she doesn't do incredibly loyal retellings but takes bits and pieces of inspiration. I suppose it's up to you where you draw the line of a retelling, or free IP inspiration. But one thing to understand about IP is that Sarah J. Maas would have to get Disney's permission to call her work a retelling of Disney's Sleeping Beauty. Much like Beauty and The Beast, she did not "retell" the Disney princess movie, but the original La Belle et la Bête by Gabrielle-Suzanne Barbot de Villeneuve published in 1740. So with that little lesson in intellectual property, lets look at the story of The Glass Coffin, because it is actually quite interesting:
A magician forces a proposal on a Maiden using his magic. The Maiden is repulsed by the use of magic in the proposal and rejects him. The Magician turns her brother into a stag, traps her in the glass coffin, and enchants the land around them.
There is a LOT to unpack here. I do not think Lucien is "The Magician" in this story. Instead, I think the Cauldron is, and I do think that the use of magic to force a proposal is a very close parallel to what Azriel discovered in HOFAS: That the Cauldron had been corrupted by the Asteri to serve their will. If you have read all of the books in the multiverse, you know that there is no other SJM universe where mating bond rejections happen. There is no other universe in which there are unhappily mated pairs forced together because the function of the mating bond, at a base level, is simply to produce the most powerful offspring. Mates in other worlds are true soulmates, and they fall in love before discovering they are mates.
In HOFAS, Azriel listened to a song from The Glass Coffin. He also listened to the story of Silene, and learned that the Cauldron was corrupted by the Asteri. It is not a theory or interpretation that the Asteri curate powerful bloodlines to ensure they have the strongest food from the souls that they eat. It is a fact. So it is not a jump to interpret that the Cauldron's corruption by the Asteri, and mates that are not a good fit on a soul level but forced together to produce powerful offspring, are one and the same. At this time, both Azriel and Elain have discussed feelings of repulsion or discomfort regarding E/ucien's bond. There are also negative consequences to a female rejecting the bond, as there were for the Maiden in The Glass Coffin. Rejecting a bond can lead to madness on the males end in Prythian because he believes he is entitled to her, just as the Maiden rejecting the Magician's proposal led to him trapping her in glass and enchanting the lands so no one else could have her.
This is already quite interesting, but it gets even more powerful as you continue to breakdown the Elain coding in HOFAS.
This line basically started a war:
"I can hear your heart beating through the stone." She angled her head, as if the city view held some answer, "Can you hear mine?" (ACOWAR, chpt. 24)
Now many people have used this to claim she is Lucien's mate, because she can hear his heartbeat. Though only a few pages earlier, we had this moment:
Elain can hear Feyre's heartbeat. She says if she listens carefully, she can hear hers too. At the time, we all assumed she was talking about Nesta. And yet we've discovered that Vesperus, an Asteri, (or Valg, depending on which theory you vibe with) was also a beating heart under the stone.
Inside a glass coffin.
More than that, we have this passage:
We now know that the Prison was once the Dusk Court, and just like UTM, The Hewn City, and Ramiel, it is encapsulated in stone beneath the mountain. Within the stone of the Prison lies the long buried heart of the Dusk Court. When you look back at Elain's line to Lucien, and see that she is staring out at the city, looking for answers at the heart she can hear beating beneath the stone, and not Lucien, this all starts to click together in a brilliant way. And the imagery, the island having a soul nurtured and blossoming under her care, has Elain written all over it.
Now, the reason I bring up the Hewn City here is because I believe there is a reason for Elain's lifelessness and distress in the Hewn City that has nothing to do with her wearing the color black.
In HOFAS, we discover a few important things about Earth Fae. Lidia discovers in her time on Team Archives what the Earth Fae did, and what their powers were used for:
Earth Fae were used on Midgard to discover ley lines of power to create powerful strongholds. One important thing I have noticed is that all Fae on Midgard are said to come from either Erilea or Prythian (at least that is all that is mentioned) and yet there is no indicator of where the Earth Fae come from. it is my personal belief the Earth Fae are from Prythian. Yet the entire Dusk Court disappeared, and their story continued on Midgard. It is my belief that Elain is not only a Seer, but that she has also been gifted with the Earth powers that have since been lost on Prythian, priming her to both restore Earth powers on Prythian as well as the Dusk Court.
What does this have to do with the Hewn City?
Earth Fae experience distress when they are in places where the magic is dead or warped, and they are the only ones that can feel it:
Bryce mentions she forgets the Earth Fae even have magic, because what they can do is often unseen.
If Elain is in possession of the lost Earth power, she would have been able to feel her power literally shriveling up and dying anywhere that has been warped by that magic.
And then of course we have the fact that the cave on Prythian is an exact match to the Cave of Princes on Avallen. We end HOFAS with all the weapons in the possession of the IC, the knowledge that there are cache's of magic hidden in the lands, and that there are places where the magic has been twisted and must be freed, one being the Prison/Dusk Court.
This was the imagery used once the magic was freed on Avallen, and it took its true, lush, blossoming form:
If what is true on Avallen will also be true once the Dusk Court is freed on Prythian, answer this question honestly: When you read this imagery- blooming vines and roses, beautiful and surreal, the land seeming to know her, small blooming flowers nestling around her body and in her hair- who do you think of? Who could this possibly be alluding to back in Prythian?
Elain's coding was all over HOFAS, and Azriel's "what if the Cauldron was wrong storyline" continued. These statements are true, even if none of my theories about her being an Earth Fae are right, though I know I'm not the only one who believes that is where we are headed!
The fact that The Glass Coffin is Sleeping Beauty, and that Azriel listened to it, may not be a powerful statement on its own (though I think it is). But the fact that the Cauldron corruption was revealed, and The Glass Coffin is a story of a woman who was entrapped due to her rejecting a proposal forced by magic, and Sarah used the Glass Coffin again with Vesperus, potentially tying her back to the heartbeat Elain can hear if she listens closely, it's all just too much to ignore.
I was personally overwhelmed by all of the Elain and Azriel nods in HOFAS. I think they get buried under all of the criticism in the book. I am so excited to see where everything goes, and I hope you had fun going down this rabbit hole with me!
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