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absolutebl · 1 year

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This Week In BL

April 2023 Wk 1

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Bed Friend (Sat YT, GaGa & iQIYI uncut) ep 8 of 10 - actually this installment was better than I expected after the dreaded extension decision. I am still enjoying this one a lot, but I think it’s slipped out of 10/10 contention. Sad. I thought I high heat was finally gonna break into top 10.

Future (Thai Sun YouTube & Gaga) ep 3 of 5 - More of pretty much exactly the same and exactly the same clingy cuteness. This is a great but sublimely dumb show. It is beyond sappy. Also EVERYONE is queer. EVERYONE. I don’t like the premise that you have to leave your friends when you get into a relationship, but it does happen. I guess Fuse has to find Tee a bf? Also, babies first fight.

Pastsenger (Thai Weds Gaga) 5 of 12 eps - Boring. But cohabitation and lots of other tropes like feeding, head in lap, hair wash, helmet buckle. Kiew is SUCH a boyfriend. Also a brief lap sit (bet @heretherebedork is happy). Plus unnecessary side dishes.

A Boss and a Babe (Fri YouTube) ep 6 of 12 - ForceBook are performing their characters well and consistently, but the narrative is fighting them and contradicting them all the time. We’re told boss yells at babe but never see it, then boss says he’s never mean even though everyone says he is mean (be we never see it). It’s crazy-making. They are cute bfs who make me smile because they are ForceBook and for no other reason. GMMTV should be thoroughly ashamed of misusing these two a 2ND TIME. Especially as this is one of their few pairs willing to do higher heat. You can’t hear it but this it MY ANNOYED TYPING VOICE.

Tin Tam Jai (Tues Gaga & iQIYI) ep 7 of 12 - I just like the side seme. Sorry main couple, you are not in my heart. P’Doc Park just seems uninterested, don’t force it nong Tin just go with P’Plearn who is all up in your business and defining EAGER.

Chains of Heart (Sat iQIYI) ep 8 of 10 - It always takes me forever to get around to this one (even when I’m not on site), honestly if it weren’t nearing the end I probably would just drop it from sheer frustration. How can a show that’s meant to be suspenseful be this dull? I guess Din’s secret identity was the twist reveal? Not much of one. What about his son? I am so confused by this show and so do not care. What a disappointment.

The Promise (Thai Weds YT) ep 6 of 10 - ON HIATUS UNTIL APRIL 19.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Our Dining Table AKA Bokura no Shokutaku (Japan Thurs Gaga) 1 of 10 - OH MY GOD IT’S SO CUTE. It is pretty much exactly like the manga and I am all over fine with that. Expect this BL to be soft af, gentle, sweet and another cozy BL to add to our new roster (post forthcoming I promise). Also don’t expect a kiss. Honestly, I don’t care, I love this yaoi so much and I am delighted to see it on my screen and so well cast. It’s disgustingly charming.

Unintentional Love Story (Korea Thurs iQIYI) 7-8 of 10 - (here’s how I’m getting it) Oh they’re so cute and ridiculous confessing and hiding out. Also the sides are EVERYTHING. This is actually turning into a pretty decent BL. I like that the bfs tease and play together it’s sweet. This is a very huggy couple for Korea. And then DOOM. Betrayal. Argh! Pain. Nooooooo. Long eps and lip wobbles galore. We all SUFFER until next week.

The Eighth Sense (Korea Weds Viki) eps 3-4 of 10 - I actually re-watched the first 2 eps bf I watched this week’s installments. We know Jae Won is popular, rich, sunshine who wants to be loved but estranged from his fam. Ji Hyun is a shy, serious, polite country boy deep in first crush. Despite this dichotomy it’s JH who seems more comfortable in himself and, possibly, his sexual preferences. There’s a homoeroticism to this show that is not normal for BL (I know... but it isn’t, certainly not KBL). Reminds me a bit of ITSAY + Shelter + His the series. The director is doing some very interesting things that makes the watching experience chewy. Note the actors have been told to match strides whenever they walk together? So far as the narrative goes timing on the kiss (good kiss tho it may be) indicates that the plot will be fall out from kissing (tragedy), not build up to a romantic relationship. (Timing is a bitch.) Also… this is what we call being “dicked around by a closet case.” Baby’s first love is NOT going to go well. On the bright side, baby got himself his first fag hag to comfort him after the inevitable heartbreak. Honestly? I’m finding this rough going because it’s SO TENSE but I can’t stop watching. And clearly I have a lot to say about this show.

It’s Airing But ...

Love Syndrome (Thai Sat WeTV) stopped at ep 2 of 12 - I’m just not into any aspect of it (except Lee Long Shi and I can watch him in Tin Tem Jai) - saving to binge if the end is solid.

Venus in the Sky (Sat YouTube) pilot/tester?) 0 of 10 - not entirely sure what’s up with this one distribution-wise, but the pilot was cute, classic university-set pulp. I hope it happens because the leads are cute with good chemsitry and I thought it was fun. However, it totally holds together as it’s own little short story too.

Cafe In Love (Thai ???) 10 eps on Ch3+ - Thai pulp, about trying to save a coffee shop. FairyGodBLer came through for me, but I’m collecting to binge just in case. It’s my new policy with the grey stuff.

Destiny Seeker (Tues WeTV Thailand) 10 eps - it’s not on any WeTV I can get ahold of. Bad Buddy the pulp rebirth meets Japanese handsome host club action. Same as above.

Make a Wish (Thai Weds ?) from WaGa Creative staring Fluke Natouch (OhmFluke UWMA etc...) & Judo (The Miracle Of Teddy Bear) in a medical-fantasy. About a doctor who sees ghosts and a deity who resides in a Bodhi tree that earns merits whenever he fulfills a wish based on a y-novel by Sammon (Manner of Death, Triage). Same as above.

My Beautiful Man Eternal (Japan ????) - 3rd installment, but a movie that released 4/7 which means it’s a pain to get hold of.

In Case You Missed it

My Blessing popped up on YT. Thailand gave us a hour long take on the “my ghost boyfriend trope” with predictable results: decent heat, pulp story (which is to say no story, really) and good kisses, but it ends with death/separation. Don’t bother unless you are a particular fan of Boat (I Am Your King 2). I am, but he was, once again, underserved by this script. Sigh. 2/10

Gaga is airing Japanese drama: Me and My Husband’s Boyfriend (concludes April 14). This is a full series dropping over two weeks. Sort of a poly romance meets psychological manipulation that starts with cheating and has lots of other taboo stuff like teacher/student. The lynchpin is an out bisexual poly manic pixie dream nightmare? boy. Don’t be deluded into thinking this is BL, it’s not even messy BL. It’s just Japan being Japan. Complete with Terrible Kissing (TM). I found it an interesting subject matter but can’t in good conscience recommend it to a BL watcher.

Myanmar dropped a BL short called The Love Ring you can watch in on YouTube. It’s an interesting first(?) attempt with paranormal elements. It feels a lot like early Pinoy mixed with Vietnamese BL. It has a nice HEA and is worth 20 minutes of your time if you’re curious about the evolution of the genre. Considering the state of LGBTQ+ rights in that country what it is primarily is very very brave. I give it a 6/10

Next Week Looks Like This:

Starting:

04.14 Naked Dinner AKA Zenra Meshi (Japan Gaga) - not really my thing but yes I’ll watch it

04.15 My Story (Pinoy YouTube) - not my fandom but I will give it a go

Finishing: Unintentional & Future (@heretherebedork and I are gonna cry)

No proper post for April but remaining release I know of is:

04.18 Step By Step (Thai WeTV) - office age gap, I am all in! Even though it’s WeTV. Sigh.

April is looking a bit slender so I might start watching Destiny Seeker or Cafe in Love, or both.

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

Adventures in Captions

I think the word they were looking for was “disappointed” but I am going to start going around saying “a little bit failed” just as a matter of course. Suits my life well.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

We stan consent in this house and will always give props when it shows up in BL, probably until the end of time. Look I got so used to dub con consent is still novel and exciting, okay? (Boss & Babe)

Yes King of the Obvious, but thank you for actually confessing. Is there ED for a confession? King has a bad case.

Is that... Thailand? Recommending therapy? WOW. Props. (Bed Friend)

(last week)

Current Kpop earworm? I’ve been dipping back into the well a lot recently, so it’s FTISLAND’s Severely. Look I just really miss Lee Hong-gi’s voice.

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mischiefandspirits · 3 years

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Bernard Figures It Out

Was reading through all the comments on @frostbittenbucky's post and all I could think of was that it was Bernard talking to Tim. Then I got to thinking...

"I've connected the two dots."

"You didn't connect shit."

"I've connected them."

Bernard figures out Tim's a superhero... sort of.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tim fidgetted nervously as he waited on the front porch of his boyfriend’s house. Bernard had sounded so serious when he’d called during Tim’s lunch to ask him to come over after work so they could talk about something.

Which Tim had done, after spending an entire board meeting just going over the past week trying to figure out what he’d done.

The only thing he could think of was that he’d ducked out halfway through their lunch date on Wednesday to give Duke some backup, but Bernard had seemed understanding when Tim explained there was an emergency at GRC Labs. It couldn’t have been a tipping point, either, since Tim had managed to only flake on three other dates over the past few months they’d been dating. Kate had been happy to cover for him as often as she could “out of queer solidarity” when she found out Tim was dating a boy for the first time and Tim had managed to trick Bruce into covering a few actual Wayne Enterprises emergencies for him when they came up.

There had to be a reason Bernard was breaking up with him, though. Had he missed something? He definitely wasn’t forgetting an important day. He was good with days and Tam was even better, so she would have reminded him on the off chance that he had forgotten.

What was he missing?

Bernard was smiling when he opened the door, but there was a nervous energy to it that had Tim’s stomach sinking. “Hey, Tim.”

“Hey.” Tim gave his own nervous smile then slipped inside.

They went into the living room and sat down on the couch.

Tim frowned when Bernard grabbed a manila folder off the coffee table. Crud, had he screwed up enough that Bernard had had to make a list? He knew he was new to dating a guy, but he hadn’t thought he’d done that bad. He’d really been trying, especially with how his and Stephanie’s relationship had fallen apart at the end. “What -”

“Just let me speak, Tim,” Bernard said, waiting for Tim’s nod. “Okay, so you know Clark Kent, right?”

Tim blinked as Bernard opened the folder to show a picture of Clark. It looked like one of the employee pictures from the Planet’s website, with his dorky “I’m just a humble country boy” smile and the golden globe from their roof photoshopped in as the background. “Uh, yeah? I think so. He works for the Daily Planet, right? I think he’s worked at a few of Bruce’s events. Not a lot of outside reporters are willing to come to Gotham.”

“Exactly!” Bernard said, snapping his fingers and pointing at Tim.

“What?”

He pulled out the picture to show the next page was an article titled, “DAILY PLANET REPORTER… BATMAN!?”

A wave of relief washed over Tim and he placed his face in his hands. “Were you up all night on the hero conspiracy boards again?”

“No. I mean, I found this on a board and was up all night thinking about it, but I found it reasonably early.”

“One in the morning isn’t reasonable, Bernard.”

“Says the guy who’s always wide awake when I call to infodump.”

“Touché.” Tim leaned against Bernard and gave him a smile. “So tell me, why is some reporter from Metropolis from all places Batman.”

“First of all, living in Metropolis is the perfect cover. Everyone assumes Batman would live in Gotham, no one would consider he could be from anywhere else. Metropolis is outside the GMA, but close enough that the commute is still possible.”

“But it’s Metropolis.”

“And who would think Gotham’s Dark Knight lives in the sunshine capital? Plus, I hear he disappears a lot on the job. There’s gotta be a reason for it!”

Tim made a note to let Clark know he needs to cut back on the disappearing act some since people are catching on.

“And have you seen the guy? He is swol AF, babe.”

“Please don’t call me babe while you’re talking about how hot another guy is.” Especially Tim’s honorary uncle.

“You know I prefer twinks.”

“BERNARD!”

“I’m just saying,” he continued, ignoring Tim’s shout. “The guy is definitely hiding something! Besides, Kent is an investigative reporter. He’s gotta know a lot about cases and the underground and detective work.”

Not as much as he likes people to think, but more than he likes people to know Superman does, Tim mused. “But what about the other vigilantes?”

“Well, Kent has a cousin…” Bernard flipped through a folder and pulled out a picture of Kara. It looked like a screenshot of her interviewing Lena for CatCo. “She’s obviously the latest Batgirl. Look at her hair. And the first Batgirl and the current Batwoman were obviously Lois Lane, the red hair is just a wig. Did you see how she kicked butt at that last event she went to? She’s not as subtle as Kent. That means their son is the latest Robin. He’s exactly the right size.”

Oh, Damian better not hear about this, Tim cackled internally. His youngest brother hated being reminded that Jon was the same height as him despite their two years age difference. Damian definitely took after Talia when it came to body type, no matter what he said.

“And Kent also has a brother.” This time he pulled out a picture of Kon. The clone must have been caught by a reporter out shopping with Ma since he was carrying some paper bags and glaring at whoever was behind the camera. “At least, he’s supposedly Kent’s brother, but he was a teenager when he first showed up with the Kents. A lot of people think he’s actually Kent’s son, that Kent got a girl pregnant when they were teenagers and something happened to the mom so Kent had to take him in. Now the Kents are trying to hide it by saying the two are brothers.”

That was… scarily accurate actually. Especially given Luthor and Clark were close friends at the time that Kon would have theoretically been born.

“And that beef would explain why the younger Kent brother went all crime lord on Gotham for a while before reconnecting with the family.”

“Wait, what?”

“Yeah, Kent Jr.’s got the perfect build for Red Hood.”

Tim bit back a comment on how Kon was shorter than Jason by a good foot. Timothy Drake-Wayne should not know that. Add Jason to the list of people who can’t hear this theory.

“And then there’s this girl,” Bernard picked up a picture of Lois, Jon, and Natasha Irons walking down the street together. “No one’s sure exactly who she is, but she’s been spotted with the Kents a few times. I think the cover story is that she’s Jon’s babysitter.”

“And the actual story?”

“She’s Black Bat, obviously. That’s why she wears a mask that fully covers her face. She doesn’t want to stand out as the only African American Bat.”

“Isn’t Signal also Black?”

“Yeah, but he works in the daytime so he’s already a standout.”

“And who is Signal in this? And what about Nightwing and Red Robin?”

“Well, Nightwing’s just a Blüd who came to Gotham. He doesn’t count.”

Ouch. Sorry, Dick.

“And Red Robin is obviously an older Robin, the one who was Robin when we were kids. Kent wanted to keep him on, and I don’t blame him. As for Signal, he’s got the same backstory as all the other Robins Kent picked up, he just went the Signal route because he didn’t fit the usual Robin mold.”

“Because the female Robin fit the mold,” Tim snorted. Robin Mold, as if he and his brothers were even the same ethnicity. Or even had the same hair color. Jason dyes his hair, Dick’s is brown-black, Tim’s is pure black, and Damian’s is more a dark brown and it’s only getting lighter as he gets older.

“She didn’t, that’s the point. Kent tried to give breaking the Robin mold a chance by letting his cousin have a go at it, but he realized it just didn’t work so she went back to being Spoiler and he got a new Robin.”

Not touching that with a ten-foot pole. “Right, and where does he get the usual Robins? Please tell me you’re not back on the secret government orphanages theory.”

“No, no, no. Kent travels sometimes for his job, right? And a lot of the time he’s going to places that have been hit by disasters or major crimes. So he’ll take in some of the displaced children to train as his robins.”

Tim pressed his face back into his hands.

“You see it, right?”

Honestly, Tim was just wondering how his boyfriend could be so close, and yet so far off. “How would Kent even afford taking care of a bunch of secret -- possibly illegally acquired -- children without anyone noticing?”

“Simple. Bruce Wayne is funding him.”

“Bernard, I love you, but what the heck?” Tim blushed and looked up as he realized what he’d said, but Bernard didn’t seem to notice as he steamrolled ahead.

“It’d also explain how he can afford all the gear and how he’d be able to travel to Gotham or anywhere else Batman goes without anyone noticing. He probably has a secret Batplane or something.”

“Why would Bruce do that?”

“Because Wayne cares about Gotham, everyone knows that, and this way he can make sure someone’s taking care of the city without anyone putting two and two together.”

“And two plus two is?”

Bernard gave him a hard look. “I’m not stupid, Tim. Bruce Wayne is obviously Superman. His face is right there.”

Oh, the others are going to love this! Too bad I can’t tell Damian or Jason. Jason especially would have loved this. “Right. Bruce is Superman.”

“He is. Superman is known for being nice and Bruce Wayne’s basically all that’s keeping the city running at this point. That’s nice as hell.”

Oh my god.

“And Wayne does charity for the victims of cataclysms, doesn't he? I bet he first saves people from them as Superman and then builds them new homes for free.”

Oh my god! Why am I not recording this!?

“And the Wayne’s were rich enough to hide the fact they adopted an alien baby.”

Tim raised an eyebrow. “If you’re about to tell me this is why Bruce’s parents got killed, you might want to stop while you’re ahead.”

“It’d make sense. There’re all sorts of unanswered questions about their deaths,” Bernard muttered under his breath, flipping through the folder. He pulled out another picture of Kara. This time she was in full Supergirl attire with a bus held overhead. “So if Wayne is Superman, then that’d mean your ex-girlfriend could be Supergirl. They look a lot alike and it’d explain how she got involved with you all.”

“Bernard, she has a human dad. You know, Cluemaster. The supervillain.”

“Yeah, her dad. But we don’t know anything about her mom!”

“Let me guess…”

Bernard pulled out a picture of Karen. She and Helena were suited up and talking to a group of cops, two goons held over each of Karen’s shoulders. “Her mom could be Power Girl! Some makeup and a wig and she could look just like Crystal Brown! And Damian Wayne is obviously the new Superboy! That’s why his background is such a mystery, right? He had to stay a secret until he could control his alien superpowers. That’s why he’s always so mean. It’s a cover since everyone knows Superboy is super sweet!”

Sure, when he’s not helping Damian pull pranks or using his adorable powers to put the blame on Kon and I. “No, Bernard. Damian and Steph are just very human hellspawn. And Bruce and Crystal are human too. I can’t believe you called me over here just to tell me you think Superman is both Batman’s sugar daddy and my adoptive dad.”

“Well, that’s not exactly why I called you over,” Bernard admitted, the nervous energy coming back. He grabbed Tim’s hands. “Tim -”

Tim’s stomach sank. “You are breaking up with me!”

“What? No! I don’t want to break up!”

“Why are you acting all nervous and serious then!?” Tim asked, pulling his hands away to throw them up in the air.

Bernard shook the folder. “Because I’m trying to tell you I figured out you’re Superboy!”

Tim’s brain blue-screened and his hands slowly dropped. “I’m sorry, what?”

“I know you’re Superboy. The older one, obviously. By the way, you and Damian really need to figure out separate names.”

Forget Jason and Damian, Kon can never find out about this. He’d never let me live it down. “Bernard, you called me a twink five minutes ago. Su-” Shoot, I can not risk getting Kon’s attention! “The older one might not be as big as Superman, but he’s not a twink.”

“Well, yeah, that’s the shapeshifting at work.”

“The what?”

“Obviously you Kryptonians can shapeshift. Why else would you look so much like humans?”

… Why do Kryptonians look so much like humans? Was there some - Wait, no! Break into the Fortress of Solitude for research later! Reassure your boyfriend that you’re not an alien now! “Bernard -”

“And that explains why your step-mom was so hot.”

“Gross.”

“She and your dad were actors hired by Luthor so you could have a normal life! But now Bruce has custody so he adopted you.”

“No.”

“That’s why you and your dad were so weird with each other when I met him.”

“We were weird because he’d just gotten out of a coma not long before to find that his wife was dead so he decided to actually be a dad for once in his life, but overcompensated and became a helicopter parent to a kid who was mostly on his own for his entire life!” Tim blurted out. “I am not an alien, Bernard!”

“Well, not technically since you were cloned from Superman on Earth.”

“Oh my god! You were just talking about Steph being Supergirl! Why would I date my dad’s cousin?”

Bernard blinked. “Supergirl and Superman are cousins?”

Right, Timothy Drake-Wayne wasn’t supposed to know that. “I thought they’d said something like that before, yeah. Are people seriously saying I’m Superboy on the internet?”

“NO! No, I swear I would have led with that if I thought your identity was compromised. A few people have mentioned Wayne and Damian, but not you or Steph or Jason.”

“Wh-Jason!? You think Jason was an alien too!”

“No, not exactly, but a few times when I’ve visited I swear I’ve seen a guy in the manor who looks like Jason. It’s just been out of the corner of my eye and he’s gone whenever I look so I’ve always thought it was just Dick or Bruce or some picture of Jason that my mind was playing tricks with, but it makes sense now that I know Wayne is Superman. He must have been able to heal Jason with alien tech, but couldn’t say anything because that would give away that he’s Superman.”

Damn it Jason! And damn it Bernard! I’m dating the smartest moron in the world! “Bruce did not bring Jason back with alien technology and none of us are aliens!”

“It’s okay, Tim. I won’t tell anyone.”

Tim grabbed Bernard by the jacket and pulled him into a kiss. When he started to feel lightheaded, he pulled back, “Could someone whose skin is as solid as stone kiss like that?”

Bernard blinked dazedly at him for a moment. “How do you know what Superboy’s skin feels like?”

Tim screamed internally. “He’s saved me from a kidnapping before.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I can get you the police report if you want.”

“Huh… And the others?”

“Not Supers. I can stab Damian the next time we’re at the manor if that’ll prove none of us are aliens.” He’d rather stab Jason, but that would probably only confirm to Bernard that Bruce used alien technology to bring him back.

“You probably shouldn’t stab your brother if he isn’t an alien.”

Tim rolled his eyes. “I won’t stab him anywhere deadly.”

“That’s not the point,” Bernard said slowly.

“He’ll be fine.”

“If you say so.”

“So do you believe I’m not an alien now?” Tim huffed, letting go of Bernard’s jacket.

The blond’s eyes dipped down to Tim’s lips. “If I say no, will you kiss me like that again?”

“You’re ridiculous,” Tim said, but he kissed him anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Okay, but I still say Clark Kent is definitely Batman.”

“Sure, Bernard.”

#Tim Drake #robin #red robin #bernard dowd #timber #fanfiction

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shinymooncolor · 4 years

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Hi everyone,

Here’s a little companion piece to @canesinthecrease @siriuslyqueer’s O’Knutzy fic

As always - thanks to @lumosinlove for this fandom!

Leo grinds. Logan scowls. Nado strikes out. Kuny has a feeling. This is a short little thing. There’s a lot of arguing. Future plans are made.

——

Friday 5.32 pm

Kuny: we bring out leo and tremz. I think they want drink. We buy leo drink. Cute boy will help get girls

Nado: I love you bro. What better way to appreciate cute baby rookie than to use his innocent boy next door to ensnare hopeless girls

Kuny: I think he have fun. Tremz too. Boy very tense. Wanted fight today had to hold him away. Little puppy try to fight big dog

Nado; are you the big dog?

Kuny: bigger dog than u

Nado: fuck off you’re like build on whatever shit they fed you in Russia.

Nado: but you still wanna go out? I’ll ask tremz and Leo. What about Olli?

Kuny: not Olli last time he talk to stripper and help her get job. He not good at that

Nado: that was precious. He’s legit the only man to ever pay someone to get off his lap. I wasted $200 trying to get him a lap dance

Kuny: u can put on outfit and lap dance Olli. I know u still have it

Nado: of fuck off you couldn’t keep your eyes of me. Bitch

Kuny: you look good in heel. Hehe almost tall as me. That why picture is in living room.

Nado: Leo says he won’t drink much. Hahahaha no. Wanna go to slugs? Bet we won’t get trouble for Leo.

Kuny: slugs ok. Have shirt I borrow I only brought tshirt

Nado: don’t stretch it. But yeah. It’s in my bag

Friday 11.34 pm

Nado: hey Kuny where the hell u at? Tremz is scowling so hard and grumbling. I was gone for like 20 minutes

Kuny: leo drunk. Did u sex in bathroom? We at bar. Leo is drunk heh he wants dance

Nado: nah just made out. Lock didn’t work hahah also she was too young. Don’t wanna be creep.

Kuny: I think Logan jealous

Nado: what?

Kuny: he was rude to girl I introduce to leo and he blush when I ask why

Nado: he’s just tense af!! imagine living in dumo’s basement - he needs to get laid. Both of them.

Kuny: ok u find girl for Logan I dance with Leo

Saturday 1.33 am

Nado; did Leo just grind? Or did my eyes deceive me

Kuny: heh he grind and stole hat. He hang off Logan. Is cute like baby fluffy gray bear thing

Nado: a koala? Did they get into the taxi alight?

Kuny: yess koala. Yes leo climbed in Logan lap. I think he like boy

Kuny: Also u bring home girl?

Nado: nah can’t be bothered too much work. Wanna go get some greasy food? Also Calm down, I know you love queer eye but I don’t think leo and Logan are secretly screwing. And if he wanted boys why wouldn’t he be climbing me? I’m like 200 pound certified Canadian beef.

Kuny: I just get vibe but maybe u right. We get curly fries also u not hot. I’m hot. And cute accent

Nado: fuck off! If I wanted a man I could get ANY man I wanted.

Kuny: not me. And no. I get more man than u.

Nado: I know thAts not what you mean but hahahahhahahahhaahahahaahahahah - also, I think I couldn’t get you? I know you bub, I could get you in my bed in 20 minutes hardly even trying

Kuny: is not fair. I’m smart in Russian. Ha no u can’t - prove it

Nado; ok. I’d take you to the zoo so you can make faces and giggle at the penguins, then I’d buy you fancy sushi and fruity cocktails, I know you have a thing for hair so I’d get my fingers in your hair and you’d be on my bed. Easy peasy.

Kuny: not bad date but I saw kase scare you haha. U can’t handle big boys

Nado: I wasn’t scared? Did you see his eyes? He was about to eat me or something. Also if he hadn’t just played a game I bet he’d have been interested.

Kuny: u took cold shower.

Nado: I can’t help it man. Kase is hot when he’s angry hahahah

Kuny: home? I’m hungry u always so horny

Nado: you’re always hungry. Gonna eat me out of the house and I’m not always Horny but I have needs

Kuny: then find new roomie. U love me. U have date with right hand

Nado: alright you big lump, meet at the front doors. And leave my hand out of this. Freak.

Saturday 8.21 am

Kuny: I think this first time no girl in kitchen

Nado: well, couldn’t be bothered.

Nado: I want pancakes pleAseeeee I wuw uuuu

Kuny: I not wife u make pan cake and that don’t work when u not look like puppy. Also princess is napping on me. She cute

Nado: you’re so the wife. you came home with princess, you actually talk to the aloe Vera plant, you cook and clean. Don’t understand how she can stand your stinky face

Kuny: I not wife. U my wife I make more money and I’m bigger. Also not stinky took shower when we got home.

Nado: no you’re not. Ew don’t tell me about your wanking

Kuny: yes I am. And I not wank just shower. Leo spill his beer on me. Ur shirt hehe

Nado: well we’d be husbands anyways also you better have soaked that!!

Kuny: ur such a wife hehe my little French girl. Heheheh

Nado: you’d be lucky to land me. I’m legit the only person to keep up with your snoring and disgusting socks everywhere and I’m French Canadian Kunt not French

Kuny: u snore too

Nado: alright how’s this. Once we retire together if we’re both single, let’s give it a go. Bro wives eh??

Kuny: u make pancake and we have deal

Nado: alright you pathetic dork. Using our cat as en excuse to make me do all the work

#lumosinlove #lumosinlove ocs #sweaterweather #sweaterweatherchats

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halfemptygirlrps-archive · 4 years

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Feelings about the most recent episode of Siren and the SS Polymarine update:

So I am late on this but I had a lot of feelings to articulate and sort through. These posts are not important to anyone but me but they make me feel good so I will keep making them.

Maddie.

SIGH. I know Fola has no say in the writers room but she’s really feeling more and more ooc. It’s not about not listening to Ben it’s about not thinking about the secret she is meant to protect. Even Xander has risked a lot to keep it safe and for Maddie to bring Robb to the warehouse was really careless. People are gonna be like HOBOY MORE MADDIE HATE I BET SHE’S A RYN/BEN SHIPPER and not that I need to justify myself to anyone but I care so much because since episode one Maddie and her amazing smile that makes my heart explode and her melodious laugh has been my favorite character and they opened up more of her personality and history in season two only to kinda undo it now. You wanna see a new guy? Fine, explore even though it breaks my effing heart and my ship but dont trust him so easily. Also a few episodes you said you still love Ben and Ryn but now you’re acting like she’s just your friend which I hate cause those idiots who have been saying they’re like sisters are getting what they want now. I hate seeing just Ben and Ryn together and it’s like... I know you kissed her on the lips but are we going to see Ryn spending the night with just you at your place any time soon or are they really legit phasing you out? They’ve always given Ryn equal time with Maddie but now it’s like they hired the writers from Supergirl and much like Kara “forgot” she told James she loved him and fought for him so hard and was like lol we’re better as friends and I wanna date a white slave owner they’re making Maddie act really strange considering she outed them as in love. I also don’t like that she’s yet to tell Robb that she kinda has a gf which is unfair to him. Even if I dont care about him it’s just the rules of being poly to disclose that. It’s not “private information”if you’re getting involved with someone because that this point they’re dating and she knows he likes her and is setting up shop to be closer to her so she owes it to him to say something about Ryn unless she really is ending with Ryn too and only being her friend which again MAKES ME SO ANGRY. I said it from the beginning that Ben didn’t need to have a gf if the goal was Ryn , and they also didn’t need to do a while season about them being in love and making people get attached and feel seen and heard only to rip it away from us. I wish they wouldn’t be so cheap about drama like this but I hope the three of them find their way back to each other as a unit and not whatever the hell they are now because it was the core of the show.

Ben.

Boo if you can’t see that you have a problem idk what. He’s acting like a straight up junkie and people are like noooo but you clearly haven’t seen junkies in movies cause this is it. Shoot up mermaid cells and running tests on yourself alone? Are you insane? You don’t know the side effects and you already experimented on your own mother and yet none of this is setting off any alarms. We already see that Ben has obsessive tendencies and rather than seek help he’s doing whatever to himself instead of trying to focus on Ryn and Maddie and his father about to start a massacre. I get that he’s a scientist but there’s a time and a way for that and he should no better. Maddie’s been helping Ryn 10 times more lately while he’s turning himself into the merman Mr. Hyde and he’s the one getting all of Ryn to himself while side eyeing Maddie when he should be trying to help them deal with this crisis called Tiamat and not trying to become a hybrid. I’m just so over him at this point and it’s just like in season 2 where he jumped to try to save Ryn in the tank while she fought Katrina. She’s a powerful creature who doesn’t need you to save her like she’s a dainty princess, she needs you to be a rock and emotional support which you cannot do sitting in a bathtub. Everything that the people in your life need you to be, you aren’t being. You aren’t helping your mom like you think you are, you aren’t helping your dad cope and understand and not become a murderer, you aren’t helping Maddie understand why you did what you did and you aren’t helping Ryn by taking the corpse of her family and treating it like an animal the way Kyle did. Just because you didn’t know *that one* doesn’t mean it’s okay. It wasn’t okay for Donna and if Ryn died and the military excavated her body to run tests and used the “well, wel didn’t know her personally and it’s for science” excuse you’re using would you go “oh damn you right “? No you’d lose what little of your mind you had left. Boy if you don’t get your shit together...

Xander.

Ugh I hated him the first 2 seasons and he’s redeeming himself. I get that he was upset his dad died and had every right to be but to come back from that and not only forgive and befriend Levi but help the mermaids and lie for them and cover up bodies? He’s a better man than Ben is right now. I also love(d) that he made a new lady friend and didn’t pounce on her like a douche. Honestly for a moment I thought “damn a new love interest already?” even though my gaydar was like WEEWOO WEEWOO THERE’S ONE WE GOT ANOTHER ONE, GIRLS and she’s cute af like top me you soft butch stud you but the moment she saw Katrina I was like I WAS RIGHT AGAIN JUST LIKE I WAS ABOUT MADDIE’S SIDE SHAVE IN SEASON 1 so I was like this is great, another black queer girl and Xander is being chill af with her and them broing out was gold, I loved it but I didn’t see her seeing Levi coming, which shook me cause I didn’t know what was gonna happen and Xander really stepped up and I loved that he risked his future career and a friendship for this as well as her career. When he saw Ryn in the library (and that was such a pretty library) I honestly wish she leaned up to kiss him even if it was just on the cheek cause he did so much for Ryn and the rest and really deserves more credit. Plus I lowkey live for the little moment between them like her holding his hand at Donna’s grave or when she sat with him at the wake because it just shows so much character growth for both of them and I love the trust that they built and that he treasures even though they have had so little interactions. It’s one of those moments that shows bad actions can be redeemed and restores faith in humanity while so many people are out to harm them.

Helen.

Honorable mention for you being the coolest lady. You should have been treated better with Sarge but the fact that you know so much in spite being 1/8 and not in that hybrid colony just makes you so cool. And now you’re out here trying to edumacate daddy Pownall even though he’s crazy as shit and probably gonna try to kill you. You a real one, Helen.

Ryn.

You poor thing, having to give up your baby. It’s been a rough go for you lately or....the whole series, I guess, and now your colony was attacked and shit. Again she’s done no wrong and is trying so hard to learn and can’t catch a break. The one thing I do fault her for is not knowing that she shouldn’t have said the bit about her baby being eaten and whatnot because she’s been on land a year and change no and should know human habits better LOL. It was still classic Siren humor tho.

This post is long enough so I wont address anyone else and doubt anyone got to the end but UGH.... I just want Polymarine back. I miss them watching movies in bed and being secure and cute and fluffy and I just need that so much right now.

#siren #siren freeform #ben pownall #maddie bishop #ryn #ryn fisher #polymarine

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incarnateirony · 5 years

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So anyway, life updates on what I’ve talked about good, bad, and vagueblog.

But I introduce you to Betty White, or the Millennium Falcon, name pending.

Most of yall know that I’m on disability, dealing with some massively janky medical issues that Alabama’s bottom-ranked health care system doesn’t even know how to cover, and my wifey blew a disc in her neck at work, essentially debilitating her, too, but also earning a small settlement. In scale of it, 25K -- 21 after lawyer fees -- isn’t really much to do anything with.

So we had already known we had to fix up and sell the house and thought, hey, the land value went up substantially out here, we can pocket and flip it and be hella good.

Until her father finally came out here and in long story short, found out that the inspector that ran through this house when my wife first bought it (during our breakup period YEARS ago) didn’t do his job and it’d be 20-30K worth of repairs to even sell this place at the value her loan is for, meaning we pretty much have to short sell it to get out from under it. I mean bad shit. Fire hazard wiring and rotting roof and siding element under shiny things that hid it that have clearly been deteriorating since long before the house got a lipstick job.

So we went and found an RV, because it’s time to go. We have to GO. We have to get out of this state. There’s nothing for us here. There’s no medical care, there’s no worker protections, being LGBT women we’re extra up a creek in the area, it’s just bad. So RV it was! But finding one in the now suddenly cramped budget with the house turning up bunk entirely was FUN.

But like a stroke of providence I happened to find a listing the day it was upgraded on what has been jokingly referred to by my friends as the Millennium Falcon of RVs.

It came from an older couple, almost 60, that had been RVing for a few years, and the thing was already used when they bought it. It’s a friggin 1994. It’s old, it’s Chonk. But it was a project RV they decided to start on and while it has a solid AF 454 engine in it,

they’ve over a few years put in just about New Everything. New transmission, new air brakes, new air bags, new radiator, new septic lines, new alternator, new battery, new steering and suspension, new new new new new. Modified backup camera that tracks engine temp/tire pressure/etc like modern dashes and stays on constantly instead of just when backing up. It has its little hijinks with the in-n-out stairs being funky and the generator is a funny little bit because they didn’t want to spend 8K+ on a generator for an old RV so they got one that’s an external mount, which I imagine is why it was having a hard time selling.

Atop that inside the wife went bananas and got rid of the shitty old wallpaper and painted it bright colors different on every wall, removed the space consuming fold out couch since they didn’t need an extra bed and installed an armoire-storage-couch-thing that takes up half the outter floor space, stuff like that.

This was their baby and they intended to keep this baby and did great work on this baby, and the second I saw it in the advert, I knew it, because the images weren’t all spit cleaned sales stuff, it was vacation images with their shit still hanging inside it and their party lawn with their sports teams and stuff and the shiny lights they added on it to make it a party bus like

So anyway it turned out they basically got conned into getting a newer shinier one and just wanted to get the fuck OUT of Alabama but because of the generator and age it wasn’t selling at market value which was about 15K even as old as it is, and had price gouged it down to *8500*

Thought it was too good to be true, got our old construction and mechanic friend go out out there and go over it with a fine toothed comb and this thing, as he put it “goddamn if I had the money, I’d buy it myself, what the hell, you ain’t gonna get anything better for that price, hell, you ain’t gonna get anything as good for the price” THEY JUST WANTED TO GET OUT OF ALABAMA. And I mean, MOOD, BIG MOOD.

In fact the money they were asking for was basically to pay off loans and costs on all the New Stuff they put into it to begin with.

Because of them basically gouging their asking price in half an old lady had come to see it same day and at first the husband was like WHOEVER GETS US THE MONEY FIRST but talking to us the wife was like HELL NO THAT OLD LADY COULD BARELY GET IN THE THING SHES JUST GONNA DRIVE IT DOWN TO FLORIDA AND LET IT ROT THIS IS OUR BABY THESE GIRLS NEED TO TAKE CARE OF IT AND THEY WILL and she ran interference through the weekend until our mechanic friend could go check it out.

You might ask “if you have a buttload of money why an RV” but in trying to get out of Alabama and all the way back to Oregon where I literally KNOW I can make it work out in life for us, for reasons that are a whole story unto themselves, the moving costs cross country alone for a uhaul would be expensive AF. Downpayments. Finding pet friendly apartments. And then whether it was portland or somewhere else we could get STUCK. And we’re tired of getting stuck. So we’re packing up our own FUCKING house that we FUCKING own outright that fucking NOBODY can take away from us and with NO payment obligations and FUCK THE SYSTEM.

So anyway this big fuckin honker the wife was like WHY ARE YOU SO COMFORTABLE DRIVING THIS to Shea, but Shea worked for both Uhaul and Hertz so like hauling bigassed trucks around was kinda her thing and she also worked horses so giant ass horse trailers, you name it. So she just got up in there like she belonged and next thing you know we’re doing 65 down the bendy ass mountain freeways of central alabama like we been doing it for years

PS when you are in a literal fucking house 65 feels like 90, I’m just letting you know that now.

We’re still at our house cuz we gotta get this properly under our own tag/insurance and get a tow for the car. It was funny though cuz experienced or not knowing it was OUR LITERAL HOUSE Shea started like GOTTA BE CAREFUL GOTTA BE CAUTIOUS GOTTA MAKE SURE NOBODY DUMB and it turned into GET OUT THE WAY FUCKERS I’LL WIN within the 120 mile haul back home. Like BITCH I’LL TAKE MY FOOT OFF THE GAS BUT I AINT GONNA TRY TO JACK RABBIT STOP THIS FUCKER SO YOU BETTER GET SOME GIDDYUP IF YOU GONNA MERGE YOU FRIGGIN HONDA

This beast only has 65K miles on it. And that sounds like a lot but for an RV that isnt S H I T. People are like, if you can find a used one under 100K you’re doing okay. Half of those miles are just taking it out for a jog because you’re supposed to drive it once every couple weeks to keep it from rusting out basically. They just safely drove it in like a tristateish area down here for a few years as you can see on the cabinet stickers and moved around to sports games and shit and had fun.

The bedroom is purple. The kitchen is blue and yellow. KJSDKJFSjk she was like “Fuck the 1990 floral wallpaper we updating, there’s extra paint in one of the storage bins if you wanna touch any of it up”

So that’s it. We’re gonna do some work with said mechanic friend on the AC and a few tweaky details and as said, gotta tag/insurance/tow but once we get that worked out, that’s it, that’s home starting in a few weeks.

We’re heading to Independence, Missouri first to touch base with my internet momma then swinging in Salt Lake City to meet old media friends like the folks at Arrowstorm and stopping to enjoy their stuff at Evermore Park before hitting Portland which, reasonably, I’ll guestimate we’ll be at like a week or two before Halloween but maybe we’ll make better time. If you’re en route to those destinations and wanna meet up, lemme know, we’re still gonna have fun on the way and try to record shit.

Portland is the city I know how to work to and from the bone. I can turn any quarter into at least a dollar there, quite literally; I know how to eat eight times a day for free if need be. I reasonably think we can stay WELLLLLLLL above the line of needing that kind of assistance but because Shea is very anxiety driven to know we outright have a promised home and have promised food if worst case scenarios happen really made her go, you know what, fuck it, sure, Portland, you loved Portland, the wages are good in Portland, let’s do Portland.

If we start with dry camping at locations with free plug ups even still paying for Shea’s car and insurance, once major gas costs GETTING there are done, we’ll be running about 500 a month, and again, that’s including insurance for both vehicles and paying off her car note. Depending on the lot we land at, 700-900 a month. I can float that on my casual residual income. Everything after that is profit. Everything after that is success. I refuse to let Shea be anything less than Okay, but most of all, weird and nonconformative as it is, everything after this is scales of success. Hell minus the car note we’d be under 600/mo on the pricy end. We got dis.

No more of my wife being convinced she needs to performatively pull loans on her livelihood and shelter for the illusion of a 3/2 middle class life with a picket fence and a job she hates in a place she hates that she doesn’t know how to get away from. Hell, if she ends up hating Oregon? WE CAN PICK UP OUR HOUSE AND MOVE.

QUEER CULTURE IS HAVING THE MILLENNIUM FALCON OF RVS RAINBOW PAINTED INTERNALLY TO HAUL ASS TO PORTLAND OREGON AND AINT SHIT YOU CAN DO TO STOP US, FUCKERS.

It’s literally parked in our yard right now awaiting our voyage.

You bet your ass we’re getting an aux cord and blaring classic rock on surround sound the whole goddamn way

Also gonna get a CB radio to roll with some of the better trucker herds out there. Trust me, solid investment for a multitude of reasons. And entertaining.

If you don’t know what Smokie In The Woods is on a CB radio, you don’t know the road.

It also comes with a lot of gadgets you usually have to buy, like converters for USB chargers in older vehicles and the cable antenna and an extra tent and hell they left two bikes on it like YALL WANT EM YOU CAN HAVE EM, SURE

So buying the RV, paying the friend for the loss of a work day, the necessary gas to get out there, and the tow all in all is gonna run us about 12,000 bucks total, which isn’t a bad deal for bringing your own house with you.

We already burned a few thousand of our settlement trying to fix this house before the bad news and/or upkeeping bills but now it’s time to burn it and walk. By the time we roll I’m expecting us to have about 4K over costs in the bank, which is... enough. It’s more of a nest egg than we’d have if we stayed here that’s for sure, covers emergencies on the way there and gives us a few months to get our shit together. Even the part-iest part time job out in Portland will float any overhead on bills much less if shea can fall in with all the media and digital work out there with her graphic design and art, we’re eyeing the portland saturday market to sell her stuff at in season too. SCREW THE SYSTEM YALL

#not spn #me #the road so far

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childfreeparentingadventures · 5 years

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An updated PSA about what this blog is and isn’t

Since I seem to have a lot of mommy blogs following me, let me make this clear: This is not a mommy blog. This is a parenting blog and specifically a queer parenting blog. I’m not cis and I am sure af not anything approaching straight. My experiences through this journey are not going to line up with the heteronormative ones and I really can’t relate, nor am I making any effort to do so.

I am NOT a Mombie. For fucks sake that’s the entire reason this blog exists and it’s in my goddamn tag line! I have a life. I have my own identity. I am a grown ass adult who happens to also be a parent. This blog is about incorporating that parenting aspect into an already fully existent and autonomous life, not drowning in baby names or onsies or best tips for teething! Fucks sake, I deal with that shit enough, I don’t want to rehash it to fucking death.

You wanna message me and ask for a recommendation on baby gates, tips on healthier lifestyle, discuss the non-cis pregnancy experience, get some resources on atheist homeschooling? I’ve got your back!

You wanna whine that your husband never helps you with the kids? You need a divorce attorney and condoms, not a mommy blog.

I’m going to be completely honest here: I’m not really having a hard time. My marriage is fantastic, (my dating life is shit, but whatever, that’s on the back burner), my kid is amazing and overall pretty easy to deal with, and they’ve got three parental units who are completely devoted to them. Sure, I’ve got issues I’m going through and dealing with, but I’m not really bitching about anything in my personal life.

So what is this? This is a place for honest information about parenting (because that is severely lacking), for science, and for motherfucking activism.

Our world is a goddamn mess right now. The planet is dying, there’s an active Nazi party, there are multiple genocides, and almost daily mass shootings. If you’re not doing something— anything— to try and stop it, you’re complicit in it. And frankly you’re a coward and a horrible parent. I get the overload and the apathy from too many horrible things happening too long, but guess what! You’re a parent now! It’s not about you anymore. When you chose to carry that baby to term (or fuck an anti-choicer) you gave up your right to just let things be. You’re responsible for bringing a life into this world, you bet your motherfucking ass you’re responsible for creating a world they deserve to live in.

And if that’s not what you’re here for.... off you go!

#parenting blog #parenting #queer parenting #mommy blog #not a mommy blog #psa

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terri9274 · 7 years

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Taylor’s Unreleased Songs

This is me trying to coalesce some of her unreleased songs and how I interpret a pretty clear queer reading. I might do more than one of these, not sure. I’m definitely not a lyric analysis person but I’ll highlight the songs and some choice lyrics I think are very gay-coded and about her experience as a young gay teenager. Now, who could these songs be about you may ask? For most I don’t know. I don’t really know when most of these were written but most of her unreleased songs were written Pre-2006, prior to the release of her first album. So in that vein, some of them could be about her high school girlfriends, Lacey and Kelsey. Or an unknown crush or hook up. Okay, let’s get into this. Most of the credit for lyrics goes to AZlyrics.com. Most of the songs I’m gonna talk about are here.

“Angelina”

There’s some posts about this already around here and an amazing analysis by @that-curly-haired-lesbian here EDIT: This was written much younger than I thought. She wrote it in middle school in 2002(x)

“Being with my baby”

All is quiet in the world tonight Catching stars and fireflies The summer sings a lullaby With just me and my baby On the hood of his daddy's car Pass around his old guitar Bet mama's wondering where we are It's just me and my baby The world is spinning round Cause look just what I've found

Ooh, life's so sweet right here Ooh, keeping it young and crazy Ooh, just wanna stay right here Cause nothing's quite like being with my baby Driving home by the river side Wishing I could slow down time Taking pictures in my mind Both me and my baby The car pulls up and I'm home too late We didn't take that interstate Back roads was a better way For me and my baby The closer that we get Oh, I can't leave yet

Look at what we've found So turn that car around

This reminds me of “Our song” with the subtle-ish sneaking around and the mama lyric. Otherwise cute af song. What if this is about the same person “Tim Mcgraw” is about. She mentions summer in both songs. It seems like she wants time to slow like they only have the summer left like “Tim Mcgraw”. The whole car date under the stars seems familiar(and gay). What if “Tim Mcgraw” is about Lacey, her first girlfriend. The timeline of what we know about Lacey and her fit. Written in 2004(x)

“Better off & “Fall back on you”

Talked about these songs here (x) EDIT: “Better off” written in 2004. “Fall back on you” written in 2005.(x)

“Closest to a cowboy”

Snap buttons on a denim shirt Blue jeans and a little dirt That’s the closest you’ll see me Feet hanging out a pickup truck Crazy and a little rough Running free That’s the closest to a cowboy You’ll see me Before I met him I was so sane and grounded Before he taught me how to lie And crawl out the window I learned the dirt roads And I got my heart broken Cause that cowboy taught me how to cry And how to let go I thought there for a little while Every sunset I’d be a riding off with him

It was all a little Wonderful and strange But I’ll never look At a sunset the same light

There’s sneaking around again that is similar to “Our song”, which is important to note she wrote around the same time, like 2005, like most likely most of these songs. What is this is again about the same person “Tim Mcgraw” and “Our song” are about(x) Boyfriend Taylor for the win!

“I know what I want”

Don’t try me Don’t fight me You be you and I’ll be me They say I’ve always known What I wanted My friends and enemies Will tell you it’s true You will find out I always get it I know what I want And it ain’t you Your mum and daddy’s walls Are covered up in pictures of you You never met a mirror That you didn't look again into So sorry, don’t worry I’m sure there are so many girls Who love you like you do

Oh baby, don’t persuade me I know that you ain’t used to no So let me say it real slow

This song is badass and GAY. I love a Taylor song that’s feisty and self-assured and confident. It could be about a guy bothering her even though she has been so clear she knows what she wants and it will never be him(or any guy), especially not some conceited asshole who won’t leave her alone. I love this cuz listening I’m like “You go, Taylor tell him off that you’re fucking gay!” Lol. There are some myspace comments of Taylor’s that are similar the theme of this song a little that I was fascinated by so here they are.

Dec 29, 2005 2:44

Lil’ Kels.

hahahhaha

I looove love love your new pictures. You are pretty,

You’re right.. you better watch out.

Because I do what I want.

-T-

What if this song is at least indirectly about Kelsey? Am I losing my mind? Possibly, possibly. The poem really just reminds me of this song, but like a sadder side of the coin. Either way, this is MAN-HATING LESBIAN WITCHERY. I’m gonna leave you with some wise words from Ms. Leslie Jones that I think is appropriate.

“I used to fly”

I’m hopelessly lost with this song. Maybe a metaphor for hiding a relationship with someone, and they broke up? Its just so vague I really don’t know.

“I’m every woman”

This is a cover and its sexy and cute. Go, Taylor!

“Just south of knowing why”

She didn't have a reason to go, oh no She didn't have a reason to stay Either way she didn't tell anyone about her first ray of sun She looked at her keys and found a reason to run And time stands still when you're nowhere bound But I understand it somehow If I could drive all night would I find my peace of mind? Would it be a million miles of cold white lies And unfamiliar exit signs? I just drive on by, just south of knowing why I didn't really know her that well But I could tell that her smile was only something to hide behind She felt so out of touch, cuz she just felt too much If you don't know what you want nothing's ever enough

I don't have a plan, I don't have a map I don't even know if I'm ever going back I don't have a when and I don't have a where I don't even know if I'll know when I'm there

Female pronouns!!! Don’t really get what the songs about exactly except obviously she’s very upset(maybe because of the girl). Maybe she was with a girl for a short time and the girl broke up with her because she didn’t know what she wanted, leaving poor Tay heartbroken and alone in her feelings.

“Live for the little things”

One daybreak, one heartache Every once-upon-a-time That black dress, happiness Bubble baths and quarter lines

This is interesting. That verse remind you of anything? “ When you think happiness I hope you think that little black dress”. “Tim McGraw” anyone? Possibly this song is also about Lacey?

“Long time coming”

I got a lying smile I never put out for you Cause I guess I never felt like I really needed to And they say little girls have big dreams And nothing in the world was gonna come between me and you And it was a long time coming I waited half my life just to find someone like you I spent a long time finding out love hangs around after you walk out Not knowing it'd be a long time going They say it's better to have lost than never to have loved at all And I say, whoever said that didn't have too far to fall And they say little girls are so naive That wasn't how it was supposed to be with me and you

I've burned my bridges, had sleepless nights Washed my sins on the neon lights And I'm still not over you

What that? Oh, just the sound of my heart breaking. “ Washed my sins on the neon lights”. *coughs*gay. Reminds me of the Red album prologue actually. The Neruda quote she quote, “Love is so short, forgetting is so long”. Right, @theredalbumprologue? Sorry, absolutely could not resist. Gender neutral.

“Mandolin”

People there can't help but care About the friendly music of a guy Who's getting by from their applause He's got a song that moves along He's got his local crowd tonight At Angelina's family bar and grill He's got his heart on his sleeve The songs he plays just living free But who knows what goes through his mind When he plays a song it brings along Everybody saying Who's that guy who plays the mandolin... mandolin Oh yeah, mandolin

Oh he's the kind of guy Who never really wanted fame His feet are planted firmly on the ground He never wanted people to remember his name He never wanted word to get around That he found heaven on earth He's got his heart on his sleeve The songs he plays just living free But who knows what goes through his mind When he plays a song it brings along Everybody saying Who's that guy who plays the mandolin Oh, I'm the guy who plays the mandolin Mandolin Oh, mandolin

This song is a mindfuck! I was just minding my business walking my dog and then the last verse plays and ????. What kind of gay shit have I stumbled upon. I don’t even think Taylor plays the mandolin, but not sure. The whole, what goes through his mind when he plays a song is very interesting, maybe she’s saying “hey, I got closeted by my team so I can be successful in country music and maybe everyone doesn’t know who I’m really singing about and how I feel, cuz the whole my songs are my diary isn’t exactly me, its a persona.” At Angelina's family bar and grill, what the fuck, right @that-curly-haired-lesbian? I am confusion though, I don’t get how most of this remotely fits Taylor. BUT VERY GAY.

“The diary of me”

I’m a laid back T-shirt, blue jean, mood ring Kinda girl Hey yeah what’s the word on you Lay low I’m a mission rebel Angel devil Little left of the middle Sometimes I get temperamental But here I am an open book Turn the page it’s all the rage Get a look on the inside Oh what you get is what you see Baby you hold the key To the diary of me

This is like the song form of her public persona during the start of her career. Total boyfriend Taylor in full view. She clearly used to write before she really made it more openly about certain things that later she couldn’t really talk about, like it seems she rather not wear traditionally feminine clothes in favor of nice t-shirt. Yet what does she wear in public and for performances? Just something to think about. She writes lyrics like this in many earlier songs, “A place in this world”, “Tim Mcgraw”, “Diary of me”, “Closest to a cowboy”, “A Place in this world”, “What to wear”,”You belong with me”. Forced femininity AND being closeted and having to act “straight” is a nasty combination. The whole my songs are my diary was the inception of her authenticity problem because Swifties STILL think that they know everything about her and that she wouldn’t “lie” to them. Closeting is not a lie. This era she’s really trying to get the farthest away from that than ever. See the Rep prologue. She has been inviting speculation into the simple clear fact that people just see what she shows them and that things aren’t always as they seem.(x) But it’s more explicit than ever now.

“My turn to be me”

Something about me didn't fit into your perfect world I bet the bluegrass stained your smile You should use a darker color when you write on the wall I haven't read it a thousand times Maybe if you saw me for a second you would realize Honey I was trying so hard To talk, walk, think, stop Anytime you want me to Bend all my rules I used to let you choose Who you wanted me to be This time I'm flying free It's my turn to be me

Looks like she’s trying to fit into the mold of heteronormative standards, she wanted to be accepted. The straights think this song is about a guy she was dating that was very controlling, but through a queer perspective it seems obviously much deeper than that. Although, possibly she dated a guy for a little bit as part of her trying to fit in and she felt trapped and with all these expectations that were not her. Just an idea. Either way, this song is about breaking free from that toxic thinking and realizing the most important thing is making yourself happy. In other words, the rise a gayby boyfriend Taylor?! GAY.

“My cure”

I know we've got a lot to say Between now and forever But I'd be a game if you would play And not dare this to get better So all throughout the day You smile and walk away All I can think to do Is follow you If you ever leave I'll be crawling back for more If you ever need love I'm standing at your door I'll be sick inside if baby you would be my cure Wherever you think I am tonight Just know we're miles from a heartbreak Because in the blink of one pretty brown eye I'll be right where you are baby

Sometime along the way You took my breath away Distracted by the view I fall right into you

They say I need to see all the people out there waiting But you take one look at me And I know the mistake I'd be making

I know we've got a lot to say between now and forever

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. One of my favorites that I listened to. It is such a soft gay anthem! Although, yes very adorable, seems she could also be referencing that a lot of people did and still do say that being gay is a sickness and unnatural(x). So it seems in this she is saying that she doesn’t care if people know or find out and call her things because “This love”(her queerness) is good no matter what they say. Gender neutral. She says pretty brown eye, so if that is accurate it can’t be about Kelsey(she has green eyes). Maybe Lacey or an unknown girl.

“Never mind”

Look at you Look at me Look at who we could be I wanna know who you are What you want from the stars And every time I look at you I can hardly say a thing My head starts to spin and it hits me then I love you And every time you look at me I could go crazy but I don't Say it but I won't 'Cause I'd rather be alone than lose you And all I really wanna do is be next to you But I'm too tired to fight And I could tell you now But baby, never mind All the time Everyday There's nothing I can do, baby, to make it go away So look at you And look at me And think of who we could be But every time I look at you I can hardly say a thing My head starts to spin and it hits me then I love you And every time you look at me I could go crazy but I don't Say it but I won't 'Cause I'd rather be alone than lose you

All I really wanna say is I need you, babe But how could you understand? What happens if you turn away and everything turns blue and grey? And I just wish I told you never mind And I could tell you now, but baby, never mind Yeah, oh yeah I could tell you now but never mind Yeah, oh yeah yeah And I could tell you now but never mind

This screams straight girl crush who she was friends with.

“Don’t hate me for loving you”

He walked around my life And made me blind With every single move He caught me staring at him Mad about him Little that I knew Love is different When you play the fool And all I wanna do is say Don't walk away now And don't rip my heart out Don't you make cry tonight Like you always do And don't hate me for loving you

Unrequited straight girl crush. She’s written many songs like this but this is this is very stark and explicit and just very gay-coded more than others like this, i think. Some examples, “Teardrops on my guitar”, “Invisible”, “Stay beautiful”, “Hey stephen”, “You belong with me”, “Don’t hate me for loving you”, “Never mind”. What straight girl would worry that a boy would HATE her for liking him? Thinking the girl you have a crush on would be disgusted by you and your feelings and totally reject you is terrifying and heartbreaking and something basically all lesbians can relate to especially when they were young. SAD.

“One thing”

It wasn't just like a movie The rain didn't soak through my clothes, down to my skin I'm driving away and I, I guess you could say This is the last time I'll drive this way again When there's nothing to say and I try to grab at the fray Cause I, I still love you but I can't Bye, bye, to everything I thought was on my side Bye, bye, baby I want you back but it's coming down to nothing And all you have is to walk away From the one thing I thought would never leave me, yeah The picture frame is empty It's black and white, you're smiling down at me I take your photo off the dash And back to the conversation I was so sure of everything we thought we'd always have I'm lost in the sound of it But here in the now comes in Seems like I'm becoming part of your past

And there's so much that I can't touch You're all I want but it's not enough this time And I can feel you like your slipping through my hands And I'm so scared of how this ends

Gender neutral. Has echoes of “If this was a movie”. SAD and gay. Break up:(

“Spinning around”

Not sure what its about but it seems metaphorical. Maybe her feelings for girls in a way make her feel cornered and caged, if I may. Hard to say.

“Stupid boy”

Let me know, how's it feel To be under my skin, wrapped around my heart Is it like anywhere you've been? And everything I do, I do it just for you So why the hell don't you love me? Why the hell don't you need me like I need you? Are you so far above me? Don't you know that there's nothing I wouldn't do? But I was just a toy, which you destroyed Stupid boy I have been looking in, trying to read your mind Give you the benefit of the doubt, every single time And then you walk right by, I'm screaming out inside Why the hell don't you love me? Why the hell don't you need me like I need you? Are you so far above me? Don't you know that there's nothing I wouldn't do? But I was just a toy, which you destroyed Stupid boy What happens when you wake up, to see that you've lost? You take one look at me, 'cause that's what it cost. I was gonna be everything you need 'Cause you're everything to me

No-homo and of course still so gay. Maybe about a girl who was just using her and didn’t have feelings for her or a girl scared of her feelings for Taylor? Very emo gay. Poor Tay.

“Perfect have I loved”

If you love me, then I love you Swear by the freckles on the moon And maybe this will be enough I'd like to keep you till I'm old But if I can't, at least I'll know That, baby, perfect have I loved Do you remember the stupid things we used to do Before September stole me away from you? The time we got your truck stuck in the creek 'Cause, baby, roads weren't wild enough for you and me Saying...

I used to see you by the bridge we used to cross I found the feeling of trying to get lost You would smile that smile that I tried so hard to forget It's hard to light a fire that I still haven't put out yet

Love was all we knew And faith was growing on the vines Words were all we had And for one summer, you were mine Saying...

Very similar theme and possible timeline with this and “Tim McGraw” which I think is also about Lacey. Summer times and september? Lacey was 2 years older, this feels like a twin song to “Tim Mcgraw”. I think the timeline fits. Such a soft gay anthem, can’t get over it. Gender neutral.

“Sugar”

What a thing to see What a thing to be What a perfect love, what a perfect home 'Cause every time she walks And every time she talks Is every time he knows what a perfect world he's living on But whenever he's gone and when she's all alone His heart goes out to her on the telephone And he says, "Sugar, how I love you How I think about you all the time" He calls her "Sugar" 'cause she's the sweetest thing Oh, she's the best thing he'll ever find With her midnight hair And with his favorite stare She's a southern belle, he's a rockout king When she looks around Oh, she knows she's found Such a perfect life, such a perfect thing

Oh, there's a reason for every season There's a change within the range of every heart But the reason and the season Seem to be right so far

AAAAHHH. We all know in many songs Taylor steps into the perspective of the boy to sing about girls. It just hit me much after thinking about this, that she’s doing the same but for an entire song! At first I didn’t really think if its personal, but usually with Taylor it is even when she says its not, so its a strong possibility. SO GAY. “ Oh, she's the best thing he'll ever find”, “Mine” parallel!!! Also, rockout king?? “king of my heart anyone?? Except in this case, Karlie isn’t the king. Lol. Who, pray say, is a musician?. She wrote it like that so no one would think its about her. GAY GAY. Lesbihonest.

“Sweet tea and gods graces”

Tire swings, summer dreams, honeysuckle on the breeze Whistle County creek Laying in the green grass, I was watching clouds pass Baby, you were watching me Cold barn struck bed, everything you said Slowly educating me I never had a lesson so sweet You can get high on a first kiss You can get by with sweet tea and God's graces You can love like a sinner and lose like a winner Nothing's shatterproof You can crash and burn and come back someone new And that's what I learned from you Autumn rain, window pane, looking how the leaves change Just like the two of us Still got your laugh, your ghost, your jacket Guess I loved you way too much But I'm a little smarter, my heart's a little harder But it's still soft enough to cry Cause I remember those times I remember.........

Saw you just the other day All that I could think to say was, "Hey, how have you been?" You caught me with that old smile Said, "It's really been a while, And I still think about back when.."

“Don’t blame me”, anybody? Getting high on kissing? Loving like sinners? Hmmmm. What do a lot of religious people call gay people again? Another song talking about summer. Lacey? Relating her experiences growing up christian with her queer relationships and feelings. Seems like she is very positive and accepting of her being gay and not struggling with religion in this, which is good. She said recently at a Rep secret sessions that she isn’t religious. Character development.

“Tell me”

It was something like a perfect start to This love yesterday but now who are you I thought I knew Your eyes how to know to look right through me It's like you forgot the words you whispered to me They weren't true It's like it wasn't you Could you tell me what did I do Because it can't be we're already through Did you sell me out for a fool After you held me is that just what you do What did you need from me Tell me Take time to realize I know That people change their minds But that was something I wished you would say To my face But you run away

If I had a reason or a simple goodbye Baby even a lie Yeah Yeah

It seems to me to be about Taylor and a girl, they had a nice night and then the girl got scared about her feelings and when into repression mode. She could be terrified of everything, including anyone finding out, her family, the idea of getting kicked out. So she decided to fully stop talking to Taylor or explain whats going on because she doesn’t trust being around Taylor. Just an idea.

“Ten dollars and a six pack”

This is about a person Taylor was dating who was bad news and who wasn’t really faithful. It looks like Taylor broke up with her. Maybe Kelsey?

“Matches”

I LOVE this. Gives me such “Picture to burn” vibes. I’m quite a slut for angry Taylor, sue me. “Truck on fire”, also reminds me of “Should’ve said no”. So maybe this is also about Kelsey? Badass song.

“That’s life”

“Love or lie, live or die I, well, I guess that's life”

That lyric caught my eye. Could be gay, not sure. Take it as you will.

“Thinkin’ bout you”

I walked into a chair today ‘Cause I was thinking about you Your face jumped right in my way Like lately things do Oh, baby can’t you see The thought of you makes a mess of me I walked into a chair today ‘Cause I was thinking about you and now I I can’t walk straight, I can’t talk straight I can’t think about anything but the way It should be and it could be And till you come around again I will be Doing what I usually do Thinking about you I get lost when I drive around town Thinking about your smile I always end up on your side of town And I don’t know why There must be something under this hood That’s got a mighty strong liking to you I walked into a chair today ‘Cause I was thinking about you and lately

Your eyes are the color of the deep blue sea The one that I go swimming in every time you look at me

I walked into a chair today ‘Cause I was thinking about you...

Gay ass hilarious mess of a song! She really is a lesbian icon. I mean how much more relatable can she get?? She’s channeling Sappho with this. Hahahaha. Clearly she ain’t talking about a “straight” crush. LOL. “Gorgeous” anyone? Ocean blue eyes? Haha. The song form of too gay to function.

“Thirteen Blocks”

Beautiful. Sad. She’s driving to break up with someone but she’s uncertain and hesitant and sad about it. Very well-written.

“This is really happening”

Beneath the chandelier of stars and atmosphere Tangled like the roots on the ground The windows opened up The wind is blowing and we're both not making a sound It’s like I’m melting on into you Give me a reason why we should ever move and Tell me You’ll never leave me and I’m not crazy and This is really happening That this is really happening Could this be better? You write me letters So you see me everyday You tend to treat me like My name is up in lights It really blows me away Lock me up in a dark room And I still can’t take my eyes off you

All those kisses up against your car For all those wishes on planes We thought were stars Memories like photographs Oh Baby,Here we are

Tell me You’ll always need me That I drive you crazy And this is really happening Oh,that this is really happening

The softest gay anthem! The pickup truck under the stars seems familiar again, doesn’t it? About Lacey? Written probably before “Tim Mcgraw” because this is the start of the relationship. If about Lacey makes sense why she is so wonderstruck because this could be all new to her. “This love”(her queerness) is good and Its how she’s supposed to feel!

“Til Brad Pitt comes along”

Do you remember the day I leaned up against your car And it started rolling down the street You screamed and ran after it And tried to open the door And it ran over your foot And I was too busy laughing on the ground to see. It would take Brad Pitt to leave you It takes five seconds to need you When I'm mad at all the lovebirds 'Cause they don't know to play our song I wish that pretty girls couldn't see you I wish that all your roads would lead you right to me 'Cause that's where you belong Until Brad Pitt comes along Do you remember the time we watched Carrie And you said it reminded you of me And I threw the remote at you And you said "my point exactly" And later on that night, under the neon city lights, You paid a homeless guy to sing a song to me.

You call me lucky 'cause I lose everything But I swear I'd be careful with it If you gave me a ring

CUTE. Another funny song, amazing! Taylor as Carrie? Hahhaaha. Funny that in the chorus she says “Our song”. Maybe Lacey again?

“We were happy”

When it was good baby, It was good baby We showed 'em all up No one could touch the way we Laughed in the dark Talking 'bout your daddy's farm We were gonna buy someday And we were happy

Subtle sneaking around? Gender neutral.

“What do you say”

What do you say, when you just know That he's the one, and you wanna go fast But he's taking it slow And what do you do, when he's next to you But he's a little bit shy Well here's something you can try Hey, hey what do you say We go walking down the river all together It's a warm May beautiful day And I feel like I could Talk to you forever With the sun shining bright It feels just like a day When everything's gonna go just right I know it will be a sweet memory For you and me someday What do you say? What do you see, when you look in his eyes There's something there That he can't disguise No matter how he tries And what do you feel, when you know its real And you can't sit still If you don't own up will yeah

My imagination's running away Just dreaming about What I want you to say

Another soft gay anthem! Taylor taking the lead because the other person is “shy”. *coughs*Gay. Adorable laughing in the end.

“Me and Britney”

This song is about Taylor’s childhood and still current friend Britany Maack. She played this at the Bluebird cafe. She wrote this really young, probably 13.

“What to wear”

Sixteen blue jeans, Abercrombie T-shirt Shoes, purse, hair tied back And you should see her She's got her magic Floating through the air

She wrote this song so you aren’t sure if its about her or a story but usually she is writing personally even when she says she isn’t(”You are in love”). Boyfriend Taylor again. She sure loves t-shirts.

“Who I’ve always been”

About her music career and hard work. Feisty Tay.

“You do”

She’s enamored with someone. “Boy, you got me like a shot to the heart Got me shakin' so bad, spilled my coffee in the car”. These lyrics reminded me of “Getaway car” and the shakin’ lyric “dress” and “So it goes”. Just sayin’.

“Your anything”

I bet you lie awake at night Trying to make up your sweet mind Wondering if you'll ever find Just what you want A home-town number one Or a California loaded gun But you know you only get one Or that's what you thought But here's what you've got [Chorus:] I could be your favorite blue jeans With the holes in the knees In the bottom of the top drawer I could be your little beauty queen Just a little outta reach Or the girl living next door I'll be your angel giving up her wings If that's what you need I'd give everything to be your anything If you want hard to get If you want... All you have to do is let me know If you want a bumpy ride Or someone with a softer side Either one'll be alright Just let me know Cause this is where it goes

It's not like I'm giving up who I am for you but for someone like you it's just so easy to do

Massive crush Tay. But thats very normal for baby gaylor. She got it real bad. Hard to say if it’s unrequited or not, doesn’t really say. Tay, you don’t need to change yourself tho! Haha

“Your face”

I heard a song tonight on the radio Another girl sings about a boy Just sees his face in every space in every room And i know that if i turn around you won't be there If i close my eyes will you be there? I don't wanna lose your face And i don't wanna wake one day And not remember what time erased And i don't wanna turn around Coz i'm not scared Of what love gave me and took away And i don't wanna lose your face I've got a picture of you in my bedroom And i hope it never falls And i hope i never lose that feeling I used to get when you would call And now i wonder to myself Who were you and where are you? Were you ever here at all?

That girl in the song had it so good I wish i could close my eyes and see you I wish the sky had your face And the oceans had your eyes And the sunset had your lips And i had you

Clever, Swift! Talk about a girl and boy outside of your experience for comparison so everyone would assume she’s also singing about a boy but in actuality totally gender neutral! Nice. She wants the sunset to have this person(girls) lips? Not gay at all...

“Wait for me”

Amazing anaylsis of this by @that-curly-haired-lesbian right here!

Finishing this long ass post just to further the point that her unreleased songs are fucking amazing and Gaylor Swift is a musical lesbian icon back then and of course still is! See you on the Gayside.

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themoon-andvoid · 7 years

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1-102 for the ask thing

1.) what’s a song you depict with your childhood? doesn't remind me- audioslave 2.) did you have a memorable childhood pet? Ophelia!!! She was a beautiful and amazing cat 3.) have you ever been drunk? Ya 4.) have you ever tried drugs? U bet 5.) have you ever completely regretted what you’ve said? Yep 6.) have you ever made someone cry? Yeah 7.) has someone ever made you cry? Yep! 8.) have you ever been in love? if so, describe the moment you knew it. Yeah, the first time I fell in love I knew because she just gave me this feeling like I only wanted the best for her regardless of if she was with me or not (but it was awful to see her with anyone else) 9.) which came first the chicken or the egg? Chicken 10.) are you part of the lgbtq+ community? do you support them? I'm queer af 11.) how many siblings do you have? 4 12.) have you ever been in love with someone you couldn’t love? This is gay culture/ yes 13.) are you a good cook? Eh 14.) what is your favorite tv show? the Gay and Wonderous Life of Caleb Gallo! 15.) what is the last movie you cried during? Tbh that one with Robert pattinson where he dies 16.) what are songs you’ve cried to when you first heard them? (if any) Space Oddity- David Bowie 17.) do you have a middle name? Elaina Dorothy 18.) have you been out of your country? Yeah I've been to the US, France, and Spain! 19.) are you a chocolate fan or not? Yaaa 20.) how many people have you kissed? Not counting truth or dare kisses with friends- 11? At least 21.) what is your favorite album? Rn probably Digital Druglord or Nothing Above Nothing Below 22.) what is your dream car? Something old and aesthetic 23.) what is your lucky/favorite number? 9 24.) what is your favorite flower? Baby's breath? 25.) books or movies, why? Books bc they've always been there for me 26.) have you ever been on a blind date? No 27.) has one of your friends ever backstabbed you? High school in a nutshell 28.) have you ever backstabbed one of your friends? Probably 29.) what thing do you symbolize love with? Making people watch heathers 30.) do you have neat handwriting? Noooo 31.) do you have a friend with benefits? Sorta 32.) do you want a friend with benefits? Depends on the alternative  33.) if you could be anything in the world, what would you be? Not mentally ill 34.) have you ever been blackout drunk? Far too many times, far too often 35.) have you ever met someone famous? A couple musicians ? 36.) how many concerts have you been to? A bunch 37.) which concerts have you been to? I can't remember things rn 38.) do you have a hidden talent? ;) 39.) what do you do when you’re stressed? Masturbate/smoke/cry/run repeat 40.) do you think money can buy love? Not real love 41.) how old would you date? 20 42.) have you ever done something illegal? Shoplifting+ tresspassing 43.) what is your biggest fear? Being alone and unloved 44.) what is an unusual fear you have? Idk 45.) can you drive? Less can you, more should you 46.) do you believe in supernatural creatures? Sorta 47.) do you believe in karma? Yes 48.) what is one quality you need in your partner? Independence  49.) do looks matter? Yes (not conventional beauty tho) 50.) does size matter? Nah 51.) who is the last person you forgave? I'm more of the one to be forgiven  52.) what is your favorite ice cream flavor? Coffee or caramel or chocolate  53.) what languages can you speak besides english? French-ish 54.) ever been on a plane? Ya 55.) ever been on a boat? Ya 56.) is there anyone you’ve lost touch with that you wish you hadn’t? Yep 57.) are there any friendships you regret? Yes 58.) are there any friendships you wish you could make? Yeah 59.) have you ever stayed awake for 24 (+) hours? Yep 60.) have you ever walked outside after 12 am? Yes it's my favourite thing 61.) have you ever seen a sunrise completely through? Yeah! 62.) are you scared of rollercoasters? Yes 63.) on a scale of 1-10 how stressed are you usually? 6 64.) do you have any plans this weekend? Take a bath, call Addison, see my friends! And work :-( 65.) do you miss anyone right now? Yeah 66.) who do you wish you were talking to right now? Jade or Simon or Addison or Avery I miss Avery sm tbh 67.) if you could have any superpower, what would it be? Super good memory 68.) who is your favorite superhero? Spider-Man tbh 69.) are you dirty minded? Ya 70.) what is your favorite song from every decade starting at that 80’s? Can't pick just one 71.) how many kids, if any, do you want? MAYBE one 72.) who is your biggest OTP? Me n mental stability  73.) what is your favorite food? Is latte foam food  74.) do you want to be married one day? Fuck that but also yes ya feel  75.) dogs or cats? Both  76.) do you drink enough water daily? So much 77.) have you ever seen a shooting star? I think 78.) if you had the opportunity to go to the moon, would you? Nah 79.) how many best friends do you have? 1 soulmate, 4 best friends 80.) when was the last time you cried? Yesterday 81.) have you ever laughed so hard you peed yourself? I think so 82.) have you ever made anyone laugh so hard they peed? Maybe? 83.) if you could travel any where in the world, where would you go? California  84.) what are 3 words you would use to describe yourself? Gay, anxious, loser 85.) do you consider yourself a loyal person? Yep 86.) what is your favorite season and why? Fall! Perfect weather for my fav clothes+ halloween 87.) have you ever told anyone you loved them, and didn’t mean it? All the time my dude 88.) do you know how to play any instruments? Yeah! Cello guitar bass uke and piano 89.) do like like falling asleep to music or not? Yep 90.) what are you allergic to? Healthy stable relationships 91.) have you ever wanted to be someone else for a day just so you could see what there life is like? Yeah 92.) if you could be any character from your favorite tv show would you, and if so, who would you be? I'd be Jon snow bc he pretty 93.) if you could be best friends with any celebrity who would it be and why? He's not really a celebrity but I wanna hang out w Matt toka  94.) are you outgoing? Trying 2 b 95.) have you ever wanted to kiss someone, but weren’t brave enough to? Story of my life 96.) are you a good flirt? Good? Debatable. Flirt? Yes. 97.) have you ever been turned down, or have you ever turned anyone down? Ya and ya! 98.) which planet is your favorite? This one 99.) are you superstitious? A bit 100.) are you a good listener? I think so 101.) are you a good kisser? Apparently! I've been told that quite a bit 102.) would you kiss any of your friends? I think I have kissed all my friends (who live within kissing distance)

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awed-frog · 8 years

Text

Regarding Dean/A Tale of Icebergs

[Disclaimer: I wasn’t a fan of the other Meredith Glynn episode, and I’m not sure how much i liked this one either, so if you’re striving for zero negativity, feel free to skip this entire meta.]

The most obvious thing about this episode is, for me, the complete and utter disconnect between what the show’s saying on the surface and what’s going on in the subtext. Which, I don’t know - some of it is normal, because if you’re passionated about something you will notice different things and know more about it and that’s okay, and some of it I even like - the classic I can decipher this secret message, I must be a genius thing shared by anyone who’s ever learned a language and also anyone who was into treasure hunts as a kid, and as for that last bit - yeah - that’s where the problem is. So, well - let’s play.

Nice on the surface: Rowena’s backstory

Which is actually not so nice because as much as I want to know more about her, what the general audience will see as closing and minding the gap (why did Rowena even come to the US, and so on) I see as a) yet another villain being queer-coded and b) a tantalizing glimpse of a world I’ll never get to know being thrown into my face. Let’s get to the queer-coding first, because this is the main issue and man, I can’t believe they did it again, and it doesn’t even matter Rowena was offering herself up as a sex slave to all three Loughlins siblings out of necessity, does it, because everybody loves some woman on woman action, including all women, har har, so coercion doesn’t count. No, Rowena was willing to roll around in the hay with Catriona, which makes her bisexual, which brings the total of queer villains in Supernatural to - is that all of them? All the revelant ones, surely. And as we all know, the message this sends is disturbing, to say the least. And secondly - I could happily have watched a whole season about the BMoL, because they are new and didn’t we all wonder what was going on with hunting in other countries and man, look at those spells and that knowledge and those complicated moral questions and now it turns out they’ve got a beef with Rowena and what - and instead, we still don’t know anything about them. They pop up and then disappear. Sam and Dean are mostly ignoring them, unless there’s a deep and meandering conversation going on in the background we know nothing about. And by the end of this season, Mick and the band will probably be gone, and that will be it - like Jesse the Antichrist, like the hunting community, like a hundred other plot ramifications which could hold on a series on their own and instead are just an undeveloped afterthought.

Nice on the surface: Dean being all goofy

Which is actually not so nice because we know about Dean’s history, and his childhood, and how much free will means to him. So seeing him like that - I think this is where you notice how weird this show is, and how it’s read so differently depending on who’s watching. And this actually hurt, so, ugh.

Nice on the surface: Dean x Larry (Darry? Lean? Deanry?)

Which is actually not so nice because here was a classic example of in your face dogwhistling - once again, Dean is being coded as bisexual, and once again, his attraction to women is good and wholesome and shown on screen without any ambiguity whatsoever (the one thing we don’t know is whether she blew him in the bathroom or if they actually did it), while his attraction to men is played off as a joke, because this Larry Dean was riding last night - not a guy, duuuur, but actually a mechanic bull. Isn’t that clever! A mechanic bull, imagine that! Cue long sequence of Dean bouncing up and down the damn thing, Sam smirking about it, a relcuctantly impressed waitress and Dean being all wide-eyed and heartbreaking, because the one thing he cares about? ‘Was I good?’ Of course, that’s what Dean ‘everybody leaves me’ Winchester would want to know. Women, men, his dad, his mom, his brother, his pet angel - the only thing Dean cares about is earning his keep so he doesn’t get left behind.

(All this talk about Cas feeling like ‘just a tool’ - guess where he learned that.)

Nice on the surface: Lookie here, a discussion about consent

Which is actually not so nice because, and I can’t believe I’m saying this, what Dean’s conversation with that waitress implied is that guys can’t get raped, and they sure as hell can’t get raped by smokin’ hot 20-year-olds, amirite, because check out the rack on that chick - she can take advantage of me any day of the week, mate. Now, I have complicated feelings about this whole issue and this is neither the time nor the place to discuss them, but the bottom line is, enough with this bullshit. The idea men want to have sex every hour of every day with any hot woman who comes through the door - next. Sexual behaviour is both personal and fluctuating - what turns you on one day can leave you meh the next, and that includes getting blown by waitresses in Old West-themed bars. Also, this may be a novel idea, but men are human beings as well and they have, uh, feelings? So, sure, sometimes they just want to have fun, and don’t we all, but probably not all the time? And Dean - look at him - dad bod or not, he could probably talk his way into anyone’s bed, and yet he hasn’t and doesn’t. He never touched anyone for months and months, and that was a choice, not circumstances, because we know Dean is tired of the adios and wants to try new things and have a meaningful connection for freaking once, which means this - this was him worried and angry and frustrated and unable to talk to anyone about it, yeah, because Mom’s off somewhere and it’s not like she cares, and Cas is on the verge of suicide as it is, and Sam’s apparently done with his caring ways and We got a case to work, so get it together, alright?, so what is Dean supposed to do here? And yet, this moment, which - to me - is actually sad af, first becomes an example of what the right kind of masculinity is like, and second gets played off for laughs, because, man, you can’t take advantage of me, babe, look at you, and I’m just bummed I can’t remember. Ugh.

Nice on the surface: Sam being all concerned

Which is actually not so nice because I should probably stop trying to guess what’s going on with Sam, except what the fuck is wrong with Sam? He used to be - well, he’s a complicated person, but lately he’s just - like, apparently he doesn’t talk to anyone, right? and that’s been canon for some time - that he’s got no connections, no friends, no nothing (and that’s not painful at all) but the fact he texted both Mary and Cas to give them the heads up about Dean’s broken phone throws this into sharp relief, again: Sam doesn’t talk to anyone. Dean is the one playing silly phone games with Mary and calling Cas at random moments to say nothing at all, and I bet (this is offscreen stuff, but still) that he’s got a whatsapp conversation open with Claire and Alex and he bickers with them about music and he may even talk to Jody or Donna or some other hunter from time to time (remember in Baby, when he’d texted that woman we never heard of because she might be around and want a beer?), and Sam - Sam is still so traumatized, perhaps, or feeling unclean after his latest brush-up with Lucifer, that he isolates himself. And not only he doesn’t want to talk about what’s going on with him, but he flat-out refuses to hear what’s going on with Dean, as well. That bitch face he pulled in the car, that snarky ‘we got a case to work, so get it together’ - that was well beyond the line of mean, and if we consider how Kumbaya Sam used to be in earlier seasons, a huge character shift. Also one that’s been building and simmering for so long, we might actually have to consider if it’s a character shift at all, or if this is simply who Sam actually is.

Nice on the surface: The Winchesters save the day, again

Which is actually not so nice because okay, now I’m sort of convinced the Winchesters’ sloppiness is on of the themes of the season? First of all, there was the way the first few minutes were framed - a man running through the woods, frantically calling his loved ones - I totally thought that would be a victim of some kind, and instead, nope. As Rowena points out later in the episode, Dean is a killer, and I’m always slightly uneasy during witching episodes - on the one hand, I get why the show is so hard on witchcraft, and I like that, but on the other - these are humans, right, and what’s the difference between killing someone with a gun and killing someone with a hex bag? And, sure, later we do learn the Loughlin family is Moste Ancient and Evile, but Dean didn’t know that when he started chasing after Gideon, did he? He was slightly drunk, and he simply started shooting at someone who’d used mild magic against him in a parking lot, without waiting to hear if there was a good explanation for it (maybe the guy had dangerous and vengeful accomplices somewhere, maybe he had nothing to do with the murder, maybe the murder was sort of justified, maybe maybe maybe). If Gideon’s siblings and been sensible and had skipped town for a few years (the whole Rowena story implies they’re supernaturally long-lived, right? and this is something fiction never gets quite right about immortal creatures - what’s the difference in switching safe houses for ten or twenty years, and why would you risk staying in one place at all?), Dean would have died, along with countless other people. Next we’ve got Sam calling Rowena (wtf?), Sam not telling anyone Dean’s got hours to live (why bother?), Sam leaving a dangerous witch who hates them both to care for his severely debilitated and mindless brother, Sam storming an ancient Den of Wicked Wisdom on his own...let’s be honest for a second - can’t you sort of sympathize with the BMoL’s concerns? Because I’m starting to think we might have an Indy Paradox on our hands here.

Nice on the surface: The brotherly love

Which is actually not so nice because come on, I understand it’s difficult to get over a childhood like that, and by now we’ve got so many metas about Dean being Sam’s parent even Sam’s probably heard about it (we still don’t know what he does online all day, right? so there), but this episode was a whole other level of weirdness. Because, uhm, so they’re in town to hunt a dangerous witch who’s already killed once, and Sam is in his motel room ‘looking into the lore’ (I don’t even want to know what that is code for) and Dean goes out to get himself a burger and never shows up again and Sam’s, like, fine with it? And, sure, this is what used to happen with John, but it doesn’t make it right. And next, it turns out Dean blacked out and, again, Sam’s fine with it? Uhm, hello? We haven’t seen Dean get wasted in a while now, and even when he did, Sam was generally not happy with it, because, I don’t know, that was an alternative reality where Sam recognized that getting blind drunk was Not Okay? And not for moral reasons, obviously (no - we know why, right? right). And finally - despite the state Dean’s in - he can’t even tell apart his damn keys! - Sam doesn’t even offer to drive, because this is what you do around parents, right? You assume they’re okay and self-reliant and that they know what the hell they’re doing, because anything else in unthinkable. So, sure - maybe it’s time for Dean to stop parenting Sam, but it’s also time for Sam to grow up.

Honourable mentions

The doggie!!

That spell Gideon used sounded like the Irish name Diarmaid, which means ‘without envy’ - kind of fitting for a memory spell.

Dory!

The geography - Eureka Springs and Carroll County!

The torch!!!!

LET DEAN USE THE GRENADE LAUNCHER!

THAT FUCKING SONG AT THE END - GAAAAAAAAAH

#spn 12x11 #regarding dean #spn meta #sam and dean #winchesters childhood #negativity for ts #it's not even that it was terrible #it wasn't #it was borderline enjoyable #but they should decide what story they want to tell #bc uuuuuugh #enough

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