#yoolee rambles

[yoolee]

(1/3) I don't ever interact much on Tumblr, but I wanted - no, NEEDED - to express how much I adore your Saizo fics, and by extension your other SLBP drabbles. The epilogue to 'Stay' took my breath away. I am in awe at how perfectly you write Saizo, how easily you capture his voice. I squealed throughout every story because his affection and adoration for MC is so apparent yet subtle beneath your prose. 'Little One' is a personal fav for its tenderness, 'Stay' is a tour de force and...

AKoaDK, while hot, just amazes me for how loving the whole scenario is. Every fic you’ve written is just so on point with character, voice and detail that I wish you wrote for the app itself. If you don’t mind a question– do ideas for stories/drabbles come easily to you? And is the actual writing mostly a breeze or a struggle Regardless, please know that you’ve got a very eager fan who thinks you’re awesome and will read anything you write (especially if it’s Saizo 😍). Keep on doing what you do, girl. PS: for real THANK YOU for an amazing epilogue to ‘Stay’. My heart could not handle being broken into so many pieces with the original ending. Still loved it but everywhere hurt afterwards… 😭💖

Oh my goodness ;.; I REALLY HOPE you don’t mind me posting this instead of responding privately! If you’d rather me take it down, I will repost as a text with it anonymous.

I have read this like five times because it genuinely mademe tear up ;.; god I don’t have words. Thank you. I have so many feelings aboutSaizo in particular and about HIS feelings and I am so damn glad they are getting across because I wouldn’t have themif the original authors of the app weren’t so good at what they do and so if Ihave come in any way close to evoking the same thing I am thrilled. I AM ESPECIALLY happy to see you say that about AKoaDK becausethat’s how I feel too - I know it’s smut and I know it’s exciting and all thatbut it’s an expression of love and that’s so important. That’s the MOSTimportant. I’m a romantic sap y'all.That’s why I love SLBP so much. There’s so much depth and passion to play with,and it isn’t just the love story,it’s these rich and wonderful characters with rich and complex lives and their love in turn is rich and complex and layered with so much energy and so many moments and I justlove it, those moments, and I want to share my love of them and have MORE of them so I try and make them and knowing that I am doing so justsatisfies this craving in my heart  and is the most satisfying and wonderful thing to hear ;.; SO YES. MY GOD, THANK YOU. All my love

And for your question! They do and they don’t! Once I havean idea, the actual writing of it flies by. As often as not, it’s actually really hard to capture my thoughtsquickly enough, so I write out of order, because if I think of something I feel‘fits’ I have to quick scramble to write it down, and then I come back laterand figure out how everything connects. I tend to write ‘out’ from the center–90%of the time I have NO idea where I’m going with something. I have one, keycentral point, and I start there and it comes as I go and I hop chaotically aroundto whichever point pops into my head next. It seems to work for me? I call ‘emmy snowball moments. Like, with Waffle Cottage, it started as three-sentencething, and I posted it, and @mai-dreaming built on it, and the 'snowballmoment’ was imagining Shingen charming one of the princesses out of her dress,because that freed up the dress to go on the MC, and it exploded from there.And even then, to give an example, the Kenshin bits of the Waffle CottageChronicles were some of the last bits written, and Stay was written completely out of order, with bits addedback in on my first re-read when I noticed certain characters hadn’t appearedwho needed to, and I used them to reinforce ideas that were going to come laterthat I’d already written. I DID write it all at one time, in one long computer session, but just not in order. 99% of what I write is done in one fell swoop, MAYBE two because sometimes I have to go to work snrk. BUT it is also why I lean so heavily on @juniperotomewho is amazing and gives me legit and thorough feedback, recommendations and ideas and helps make my ramblings alittle more clear for an audience/reader who doesn’t have the benefit of beinginside my brain to know what I meant. She is an amazing editor and catches somany things and gives me so many key phrases and moments and helps me tone downand clarify things.  NOT AN EASY TASK. 

But, I have no discipline. If the inspiration isn’t there, I got nothing. I have twooutstanding fic requests from my giveaway months ago and trust me I sit overhere in SHAME because I want to write them, and I just need to sit down and doit, but I haven’t found my 'snowball moments’ to write out from yet. I keepevery prompt sent to me, because I am always hoping the snowball moment willhit, but I make zero progress untilit does and sometimes it takes awhile and sometimes it may not come. Whichreally means I just need to make some up and try them - the act of writinginspires more writing, which is what happens with some of my headcanon posts.If I start with the 'easy’ ones, the ones that are harder for me to write comea little more easily once I’m in writing mode.  I have this ridiculous sense of obligation toinclude everyone once I’ve started XD but some are much easier than others; Istruggle with Yasu, in part because he IS one of my favorites, but you have topick like which one of him you’re writing, boy goes through a couple variations@.@ and I also struggle with Kojuro because he’s just too organized and calm,you can’t just randomly plonk into ridiculous shenanigans like you can withYukimura and, as established, I am impulsiveso characters that require planning don’t come as easily. I deal best inridiculousness.

I re-edit everything becauseI typically don’t re-read my shorter stuff until like a week after it’s posted,and then I edit like fifty things. I’ve already edited the Stay epilogue threetimes and I only posted it yesterday XD I wish I could just get it spot on thefirst time but I’m too impatient, but every time I re-read something I’m like'that phrase is ugly let’s fix it’ or 'I’m gonna add ALL the sentences here’ (Iam a comma and parenthesis abuser, I sprinkle them everywhere for decoration -I write like I talk) and that’s where my impatience in the typing babble stream comes back to haunt me. 

I LOVE slice of life. I love the romance and everything too,but I love the idea of this world and these characters so I really enjoywriting all of the ridiculous little moments I imagine happen in their day-to-daylives. I think it makes them more real! Which is why I love things like AU Sasukebeing the first one up clamoring for pancakes and Shigezane cracking dad jokes whilehe and the MC hide in a in the enemy’s linen closet ('Man I really feel likewe’ve been hung out to dry, huh MC?Huh, huh?’) and Ieyasu on babysitting duty once Nobu procreates having conversations with this putrid,squalling creature who has just eaten his strawberries. I’m big on happyendings, too. I am glad my one foray into angst has been well received and I amtruly proud of that, but I invariably have to find some way to sneak some hopeinto all things XD

That is a hella long answer.I like to talk about myself SORRY!

And thank you so much! I was sitting here thinking 'wow, mynext post will be my 200th on this blog what should it be’ and I was going togo with a like a very off-topic gif of a kid hugging a chicken and then I gotthis BEAUTIFUL and WONDERFUL ask and I sat here kind of weepy and sniffly for abit, so thank you thank you thank you.

[onedivinemisfit]

AnS Fic Rec Bingo #1

Disclaimer: I am a disaster when it comes to reading and reviewing fic. That doesn’t mean I don’t love you all and your creations to bits, but I struggle, I admit that. Here’s to making up for it a little <3

Under 1000 Words

Title: Protector Author: @claudeng80 Rating: G I just think this one is so cute, and it reads like such a natural scenario I’m almost convinced this happened off-screen. At the very least I insist it should have happened, it fits too well with Obi’s and Mitsuhide’s later interactions, and just... *any* excuse to have some big brother!Mitsu.

Fic that got you Involved in Fandom

Title: Between the Night and Morrow Author: @sabraeal Rating: T It didn’t get me *involved* in fandom per se, but in the late summer of 2019 when I was still a bit on the fringes of the fandom, and only just starting to collect AnS-related blogs to follow, this was one of the first fics (chapter 2 specifically) that got my attention. It drew me in, so intricately written, the canon overlap making it easy to follow even with Obi’s narrative positively *insisting* on mystique, asking you ‘pls notice how cool I am’ - I quite enjoyed it despite not having read the first chapter. I mean oopsies.

Made you Laugh out Loud

Title: What light through yonder window breaks Author: @bubblesthemonsterartist Rating: T I mean... how could it *not* make me laugh out loud? Joanna took all the bestest ideas for a zenyuki break-up scenario, threw it in a blender together with a good dose of humorous quips and fluffy emotional things, and out came something perfectly entertaining. It might end up competing with the real thing, if/when canon gets around to it *cough cough*

Favourite Trope Reversal

Title: I'm (O) positive you're just my type Author: @yoolee​ Rating: G To date this is the only time I’ve come across this type of reversal, where the commonfolk *protect* their accused-of-wickedness single woman from the pitchfork and the stake, and it was splendidly done. Hilarious all-around, with just enough confusion to leave me hanging like, is she? Isn’t she? Is Obi being taken for a spin, or is he seeing signs where there are none? The conviction of the mind is such a powerful thing. 

Fic that made you Friends with the Author

Title: Seven Suitors for Shirayuki Author: @sabraeal​ Rating: T I ummm, am the most humble and unassuming and so I can’t clarify exactly when I began becoming friends with people on the discord, I would hate to assume - but when I read Seven Suitors it was around the first time I dared dm any fic author just to squeal, or start refer to Jen as just Jen (after which I slowly began using given names for most everyone) so I guess that counts as something of a benchmark to me? <////< I mean, that *is* Jen’s fault, afterall Seven Suitors CHAPTER SIX was so long and so intense and heartwrenching I cannot POSSIBLY be held accountable for what rambles I typed at 7AM. It’s a unique fic given it’s the first time in the AnS fandom I had such conflicted feelings; on the one hand, the characters were driving me up the wall and I wanted their romantic resolution, on the other, the entire setting was at once cozy, exciting, tinged with enough politics that I wanted it to go on forever.

[tentoriwrites]

Hypatia

This is my contribution to the Atlas Molniya appreciation week! Ye olde pirate AU. Sorry, folks, writing an entire fic where everyone talks like a pirate in a week’s time was a bit too much for me... It’s a pirate AU so there is some shooting and mild violence, but generally no other warnings or triggers.

Before you read: Hypatia is the name of the woman often attributed with inventing the first astrolabe. Astrolabe were the bar none instruments for helping sailors navigate the oceans by using the ship’s position relative to the stars. They are often described as primordial computers. The word astrolabe roughly means, “that which captures the stars” in Greek.

Tagging: @jane-runs-fast @dear-mrs-otome @yoolee @otomelin and @frywen-babbles

Thank you for your support in writing my first Lovestruck fic! <3

“Halt!” An imposing figure cloaked in red shouted as he spotted me dashing through the streets. Nope, nope! Not going to do it! I kept running trying to find a place to hide where there wasn’t a member of the Inquisition loitering about. My daring escape from custody was made all the more difficult by a suffocating corset and billowing skirt. Not sparing any blame on the heels of my shoes getting stuck in the cobblestones street sorely in need of repair! I mean really, if they aren’t using our tax money to fill pot holes, what are they using it on?!

My feet were taking me to the port where my brain told me I could hide on a ship until I thought of a better plan. I had almost made it when someone grabbed my arm and forced me to stop. His strong grip pushed me out of the middle of the crowded street and up against the rough brick wall.

“Turn over the device and renounce your heretic ways and you might just live.” I dragged my eyes up the expanse of polished armor to the insignia emblazoned on his chest. I could tell from how he was dressed he was a high-ranking member of the Spanish Inquisition. My hands rubbed against the rough texture of the wall behind me, the cool brick a stark contrast to the sickening heat of fear coursing through my veins.

The device in question pressed unpleasantly into my back and I fidgeted out of instinct. What better place to securely hide it than in the back of my corset where no one would find it? It sounded like a completely brilliant idea at the time. It was working well so far but If this jerk kept me pinned against the wall much longer I was going to faint, and it might just pop out!

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I’m pretty sure my voice could not have sounded any less convincing.

“Don’t play coy…” His eyes narrowed a fraction as he looked me over. “We know you have an Arabic astrolabe in your possession.” Arabic? The astrolabe I had found laying around and cleaned up was Arabic? “We have it under good authority that you have been working with the Arabs to undermine the Reconquista, the Inquisition, and all Christendom.” Well that’s news to me!

“I just found some books and tools laying around and studied them.” My voice came out on a shaky breath as my body trembled beneath his touch. I could tell from the way his grip tightened and his brow dug down he was not buying that.

“We will see how well that holds up during interrogation.” He hissed into my ear in a way that made him seem more a demon and less a man of faith. I wondered why a person of obvious belief such as himself would be so bent on my being guilty. I didn’t have much time to dwell on it as a low rumble started coming from one of the nearby streets. We both looked in the direction of the rumbling. Somehow, despite the fear singing through every fiber of my being, I managed to smile.

“It’s a Tuesday…” I remarked in relief.

“What does that have to do with…” His question was cut short by a man frantically rounding a corner nearby.

“CLEAR THE STREETS! CLEAR THE STREETS!” The man rushed by us as the rumbling intensified. It almost felt like the ground could open up at any moment and swallow us whole.

“What happens on Tuesday?!” He glared down at me and my broadening smile. I opened my mouth to answer him, but a stampede of cows rounded the corner before I could utter a single syllable. A charging bull at the front of the herd collided right into him, horns barely missing my arm. The bull took him off to parts unknown.

“Tuesday is when the cows are brought in for slaughter.” I answered smugly as I used the dust cloud for cover to slip into a narrow alley. At the end of the alley was the sea glittering in the sun brighter than the finest cut jewels. I made a break for it as fast as my ridiculous fluffy dress would allow in the cramped space.

 I looked around the docks to make sure the coast was clear before venturing out of the alley. There were boats of all shapes and sizes lining the docks. Many were in some stage of being loaded or unloaded. It would certainly look suspicious if a woman wandered on to any of them. Then one caught my eye, a smaller boat, with no one milling around. It had a Greek name on the hull making me hopeful the crew would be foreigners out for a good time right now. I tried to act as casual as possible as I walked quickly over to the boat’s gangplank. A rather clumsy hop, skip, and jump later and I stumbled onto the deck.

I glanced around before making my way to the door of the cabin. I slowly turned the knob and opened it just enough to slip inside. I heaved a sigh of relief as I slid to a crouched position against the door. I made it! I really made it! Relief washed over me as I let out a sigh. That’s when I heard it, a tell-tale click. I winced as I looked up. Seems it was a bit early to be celebrating.

“Who are you and why are you on my ship?” I followed the sound of the voice to a man leaning back in a thick wooden chair, feet propped up on the heavy table. He wore sturdy black leather boots to just below the knee with black trousers tucked into them. Burnt orange leather vest peeked out from the black waist coat draping off the side of the chair and dusting the floor on either side. Faded orange embellishments drew attention to tarnished brass buttons.

He seemed aged beyond his years, flecks of grey in his dark hair betraying a younger looking face. The large coat that hung loosely over his frame obscured most of his body. For a moment I pondered what his physique was like hiding under there. Regardless, he painted a stunningly handsome picture that hit me completely off guard. That is until a cold glint in the dimly lit cabin caught my eye. He had the barrel of a gun pointed right at me.

“Well it’s a very interesting story actually…” I called back as I quickly scampered to my feet. “You see the Inquisition thinks I’m a heretic because I found this astrolabe and fixed it up… So now they want to take me in for questioning.” There is a long moment of uncomfortable silence that compelled me to continue, but he beat me to the punch.

“So, you thought you’d just meander on the first boat you found and stowaway?” He sat the gun down on the table as he spoke flatly.

“Not exactly, no… the name caught my attention. Asteri. It’s a beautiful name! Did you know Asteri means…”

“Star in Greek? Yes, I’m the one that named it.” He cut off my nervous meandering with those few short words. Now is not the time to start rambling! Now is probably the time to be leaving…

“Yes! Of course! You mentioned that… Well I just thought I’d hide out until dark when it would be easier to escape… I’ll just see myself…” Suddenly there were frantic foot falls from outside and Atlas rose wordlessly to his feet. “Out?” He crossed the room quickly, grabbing me by both arms and lifting me out of the way of the door.

“ATLAS!” At precisely the same time a man yelled, and the door flew open. “Time to go…?”

“You heard the Captain, off you go.” The man, I presume was named Atlas, gave me a pointed look as he gestured out the door with a tilt of his head.

“Why is she even here?” The captain asked as he walked out behind Atlas.

“Stowing away.” Atlas’s voice had all the compassion of an executioner.

“I guess today’s her lucky day seeing as I already pulled in the plank and Nova is already hauling anchor.” Another man wearing red chimed in merrily as he shot the three of us a dashing smile. The tramping of hooves and clinking of metal on stone filled the air as Inquisition knights drew down on the ship.

“He’s right we’ll have to take her with us to the next port.” The captain conceded causing Atlas to mutter a string of obscenities the likes of which I had never heard before. Success! Way out of town secured! A bullet whizzed past my head killing yet another short-lived moment of happiness.

“Well there you have it! Miss, if you would kindly just wait in the cabin.” The man in red motioned to the door behind me. I gaped at him as he pushed me out of the way. Not one among them seemed the least bit bothered about being shot at.

“Why is the Inquisition shooting at us anyways.” The captain posed the question as he moved to release the sails. They aren’t shooting at you! They’re shooting at me! I looked on in abject horror as they were caught in the middle between the Inquisition and I. Bullets embedding themselves in the worn wooden deck as the crew rushed to get the ship moving.

“Ask the stowaway!” Thanks, Atlas. Way to make me feel even better about this being all my fault. Just as another round of shot careened towards the ship, I saw him, the Inquisition knight from before. He was looking down at me smugly from atop his horse. The fact that he could look so smug while wearing dented armor somehow made him even more infuriating to look at. The volley threw up a cloud of smoke obscuring his face temporarily.

“Prepare to board the ship!” The knight commanded with a sneer.

“Now! While they’re reloading!” The captain yelled as he and the man in red unfurled the sails. A woman in purple gunned down the knights trying to lower a plank onto the ship with startling accuracy. The boat lurched forward at a pace that would make a snail look like the bull runner I saw earlier. Thankfully, it quickly picked up speed as we neared the entrance to the harbor. I leaned over the railing as we cleared the sea wall, watching the city start to fade behind us. Soon even the coast itself seemed small.

“I think you owe us an explanation.” The captain said pulling me back on to the deck with the sound of his stern voice. “But first I suppose we should introduce ourselves.” He added as he motioned for us to convene at the wheel with Atlas. He introduced himself and the crew. They were bounty hunters, it would seem, and they had only been in town to cash in on their latest mission when the Inquisition attacked them.

They were all looking at me now with questioning eyes. All except Atlas, he looked like he wanted to chuck me over the railing. Joke’s on him because I can’t swim! So, that would actually be a perfect way to get rid of me… Who’s brilliant idea was it to hide on a boat when they can’t swim? Oh yeah, mine… Focus brain!

“I found this old astrolabe and book full of calculations from it. I fixed it up and started studying the calculations.” I started my explanation while trying to wrest the astrolabe from my corset. The other woman on the ship, Nova, seemingly sensing my distress walked up behind me and untied the strings.

“You hid the thing in your dress?” Orion, the captain, looked at me skeptically.

“A corset is a very secure place to keep valuables.” Nova answered for me as she loosened the strings. Thank you! I couldn’t help the smug little smile that tugged on my lips. “Something flat would be better kept in one than an astrolabe though.” And there’s goes my happy little moment… again…

Once the device had been freed, she handed it to Orion, much to my apprehension. I fretted anxiously at the strings of my corset as he looked it over before handing it back to me. “Looks ordinary enough to me.” I felt myself pouting a little at his underestimation of my little treasure.

“May I?” Atlas had one hand stretched out towards me.

“Um… sure…” I slowly reached the device out and gingerly sat it in his hand. My fingertips lingered on it a moment longer than I meant to before pulling my hand away. He looked the device over carefully, a small smile on his lips for the briefest moment.

“Not a bad restoration. Definitely, Arabic.” He flipped it over and his eyes narrowed as he ran his fingers over the back.

“The inscription was there when I found it. I put the stain on it to try to enhance it and make it easier to read.”

“Had much luck with it?” Atlas wondered flatly as he flipped the astrolabe over again.

“The notes and calculations I found with it suggest the inscription is directions to a destination the astrolabe was made to lead someone to. But I wasn’t able to figure out what before I had to make my escape.” I explained as my shoulders slumped with regret.

“Don’t suppose it’s buried treasure or anything, do ya?” Jaxon, the man in red, commented playful with an amused grin.

“Whatever it is, the Inquisition wants it, which means we do not.” Atlas answered handing me the device again. Despite Nova’s earlier admonishment, I stuffed it back in the front of my corset for safe keeping. Nova suddenly gave the wheel a hard yank and the whole boat yawed. A moment later, a cannonball sailed through the air landing in the water with a splash. I looked at Nova flabbergasted.

“Nova’s what you’d call… a clairvoyant… sort of.” Jaxon explained with an easy smile.

I glanced behind us and realized the ships pursuing us were Inquisition vessels. These guys just don’t know when to give up! Just when I thought I’d lost them, they creep back up when I’m least expecting them! I looked over the deck watching the crew members scurry around to man the few guns the small, nimble vessel had. Atlas at the wheel expertly dodged the cannon fire. There I was, perfectly useless trembling in fear.

Think, think, think! This is my fault! There has to be something I can do to help. West. We’re traveling west. I took stock of our position to the coast. I looked up at the sky to figure out the time. Low tide. PERFECT! “Atlas! About face!”

“Oh yes! Let’s just drive right in to the arms of the people shooting at us!” He bit back as an irritated glare painted itself on his face. “How about you just sit down and leave the privateering to the professionals, Princess.”

Clearly, he’s not going to listen to me. Time to take matters into my own hands. Literally. I grabbed the wheel and gave it a hard yank. The whole boat whipped around violently bringing Atlas face to face with my plan.

“That sea cave loops around and comes out down the coast to the east. They would be expecting the Asteri to continue its heading west! It’s big enough for a vessel this size but not a boat the big!” I pointed to the coast and he quickly caught on. “I am fairly certain you can get us there.”

“You’re crazy.” He started to turn the boat back around.

“Atlas, we might be able to lose them on the open water for a while, but they’ll catch us again. We need to find a friendly port and get a plan together.” Chagrin clear on his face, Atlas made for the cave after Orion voiced his approval for my plan. I watched with bated breath as Atlas turned the ship around and started to head straight for the flagship.

“Atlas… The cave’s over there.” He didn’t seem to hear me, just kept our course steadfastly locked on a collision with the other ship. “Atlas…” I could see people on the ship rushing about to point their guns forward. “Atlas…” My voice was a little more desperate this time.

“Look, kid. I’m not about to hand you over to the Inquisition that easily. If they want you that badly they’re going to have to sink this ship first! And I’m not about to let them do that!” I crouched down and hugged a railing as I braced for impact. At the last second, just before the guns were primed to fire, he swerved out of the way. I watched that terrible knight fly by as the sound of cannons being turned filled the air. The smug look on his face faded once again, watching it fall deeply satisfying despite my precarious position.

“You did that on purpose…” I muttered looking up at Atlas in awe. He deliberately picked that path, so they’d have to adjust their guns before firing at us. This guy was good… Really good…

“Hey, do your hands work?” He shot me an irritated glance.

“Y…yes?” My voice trembled uncontrollably as I spoke.

“Good, light some lanterns and stick them at the front of the ship!” I looked at him confused for a moment too long and his glare sharpened. “I could drive the Asteri through a pinhole with my eyes closed, but that doesn’t mean I want to!”

“Oh! OH!” I jumped to my feet and scurried around moving all the lanterns. Caverns are dark… He needs to be able to see… Once I had all the lanterns lit I waddled back up to the wheel. I watched Atlas drive the ship with strong, steady arms into the cavern. True to my word, the Asteri just fit. He made the whole affair look effortless, almost as if it bored him. He was one of the most amazing helmsmen I had ever seen. My idle staring was cut short by Orion approaching us. Jaxon and Nova were close behind.

“What port does this come out near? The city we left from?” I nodded slowly.

“There’s another cave system on the eastern side of the city slightly larger than this one. We can use it to obscure our movements.”

“We?” Atlas barked causing me to jump slightly.

“You’re not a seasoned sailor. Not to mention we don’t want anything to do with your troubles with the Inquisition. We’re dropping you off at the next port.” With that he started to walk away.

“Wait!” He stopped and turned to look at me. Okay… We’re waiting… What are we waiting for exactly? CRAP! I should have thought of something first.

“What?” Now even Orion looked a bit miffed.

“It’s an astrolabe so it probably relates to something in the stars. That means this whole thing is just one big misunderstanding! I need to clear my name, so the Inquisition leaves me alone!” I explained quickly as I looked around the ship. “If you can take me to the College of Cardinals I can plead my case!”

“You want us to take you to Rome?” Orion asked skeptically. “Rome is nowhere near our next job.” I tried not to let them see how crestfallen I was. Come on! Think! These are bounty hunters and mercenaries! There must be something I can do to convince them.

“My Father was the leader of a shipbuilding guild!” I blurted out suddenly. They all turned their attention back to me. Save for Atlas who was steering the ship idly with one foot better than I imagined most people could do with both hands. “I may not look it,” I continued on apprehensively, but I know my way around a boat. I can build the, fix them, design them. Plus I’m well-versed in map reading, navigation. I know the coastal topography of most of the northern Mediterranean.” YES! SELL YOURSELF! Wait… that makes me sound like… NOT THE TIME! Focus!

“What are you suggesting exactly?” Orion looked intrigued and I felt relieved.

“If you take me to Rome I’ll act as your navigator and ship maintenance person for… Five years!” That’s a good number, right?”

“We don’t need a navigator or a ship maintenance person.” Atlas grumbled.

“There is a job in Greece. You have until then to prove your worth. If you’re pulling your weight, we’ll evaluate a trip to Rome.” Orion answered definitely. From nearby Atlas was string obscenities together under his breath again.

Once we were out of the caverns, Nova took over for Atlas. It was a beautiful crimson twilight outside and the stars would be out soon. “Oh um…” Atlas stopped his descent down the stairs and turned to look at me incredulously. “Where exactly will I be staying?” Atlas rolled his eyes and motioned for me to follow him. He led me down the hatch into the hold. I looked around confused as he approached one of the cargo nets.

“Aren’t the crew’s quarters usually in the forecastle?” You know… under the elevated deck at the front of the ship?

“There’s no more rooms up there so you’re sleeping down here.” He offered a curt explanation before turning to leave.

“It’s getting a little cold in here, don’t you think?” Though I said as much, I hardly expected more than the sigh I received. I’m not sure how much time had gone by as I took off my shoes and settled drop in the rope hammock. I had started staring idly out a nearby port hole completely wallowing in self-pity when something heavy and course plunked down on my head.

“Anything else, Princess?” I could already hear the heavy plunk of his boots on the wood floor before I said a word.

“Thank you!” I called out to his retreating form. As the events of the day raced through my head, they all kept circling back to that completely unreadable man. On the one hand, it felt like he could not be any more inconvenienced by my presence on his ship. On the other hand, it seemed almost as if he might actually care about my plight. Whatever the case may be, I would have plenty of time to get to know him better even if I only made it as far as Greece.

Save for a nocturnal visitation from something I’m told is a capybara named Comet, an unspeakably large rodent the crew picked up in South America at some point, the days that followed were pretty laid back. Thankfully, I had managed to escape detention with a spare change of clothes more fitting for life on a ship. Boots and pants were certainly were easier to move around in, but I still wore the corset so I could keep the astrolabe close at hand. I spent most of my free time when I wasn't navigating trying to decipher the inscription.

I started to fit myself into life on the Asteri. Fixing broken ropes, mending sails, patching holes in the planks by day. At night I would calculate our course by the stars. Atlas was usually on the quarter deck, lounging by the wheel. I seriously wondered if he ever slept. Every night he would be drinking a dark liquor from the galley while his eyes seemed to focus on something intangible. I always wondered what it was he was looking at, but never worked up the courage to pry.

Sometimes I would make the excuse that I was having trouble with a calculation to drum up a conversation with him. He was not much of a conversationalist. Prying information out of him was like pulling a rusty nail out of a pitch-soaked board. Hard, messy work. I had the feeling though, as with the nail, eventually all the hard work would pay off.

Still, no matter what I said or how I said it, he always seemed to have a sarcastic retort to put an end to the conversation. I gathered from how the other members of the crew approached him this was just his way. That didn't stop me from wondering if he'd ever open up to me like he did them.

I had picked up bits and pieces from conversations with the crew. Atlas had once been affiliated with the Knights of Saint John. The Knights of Saint John were basically the seafaring arm of the Catholic church. The Order's primary goal was to combat the pillaging of Christian vessels and lands by the North African Barbary corsairs who were Muslim. It seemed like a pretty admirable thing to do seeing as the Barbary corsairs and been pillaging the coasts of several Christian nations including my own. Something must have happened while he served for them that didn't sit well with him. I had no idea what it could be though. Tonight felt like a good night to try a different approach.

“Atlas...” I hummed out the name idly as I took stock of our position. He didn't look at me which was fine. I was really just trying to fill the silence with something besides the lonely lapping of water against the hull. “That's a very strong name. In mythology Atlas was the being that held the whole sky on his shoulders. That's quite the burden to bare alone...”

“It's the name I was born with. Don't go getting all philosophical on me.” He huffed before taking a swig of his drink right from the bottle. Well that didn't work quite the way I had hoped.

“I'm just trying to get to know you better as a member of the crew.”

“When you're a member of the crew, maybe I'll tell you about the time I found a stowaway in the cabin.” My face instantly twisted into a pout. I had been excited thinking I was going to at least get an inkling of something else about him only to have that excitement dashed like a ship of the rocks of a foreign coast. My dashed hopes and dreams seemed to be a recurring theme on the Asteri. I looked over at him when he sighed.

“One question. Can't guarantee I'll answer it though.” YES! I did a happy little jig and he let out an even more exasperated sigh. I quickly settled myself and tried to think of a question that would give me a bit of insight into the man without being so probing he wouldn't answer.

“Why did you name your ship the Asteri?” That's pretty good right? The name of a ship is usually meaningful in some way, but still not prodding too much? I hope? Atlas's reaction was not encouraging though. He sat up straight before knocking the bottle back and taking the last of the liquid in a few hard swallows. Then he corked the bottle. With one smooth swipe of his hand he wiped the residue from his lips. Damn if he wasn't even more attractive in the moonlight. But the moonlight seemed to give his features a melancholy look.

“There's nothing up there among the stars.” He started to explain as his face tilted up to the sky. “No people, no religions, no wars. Just stars.” There was an unmistakable sadness that passed over his face for a blink and you'd miss it moment. “That's what the Asteri is meant to be. A place where none of the things that divide people exist.”

“That's... a beautiful sentiment.”

“Only if you believe religion divides people more than it brings them together.” I didn't know how to respond to him. I certainly had my own thoughts on religion. Clearly now was not the time or place to discuss them with him.

“How's our heading looking?” He asked looking down at me as he got to his feet.

“Good... It looks good. We'll be in Greece before week's end if the weather holds.” I answered absently, mind still on the last subject.

“Good. Get some rest, kid.” With that, he disappeared down the stairs and towards the forecastle.

 After a few weeks at sea, I had just about figured out the inscription when we put into dry dock in Greece to make repairs to the ship and resupply while Orion, Jaxon, and Nova hunted down the bounty.

It was kind of odd working in silence next to Atlas prying rotten planks away from the hull and replacing them with new. Well let me rephrase that, Atlas pried all the planks off with those well-sculpted arms of his. I just enjoyed the show until he asked for a new one.  We had just finished sealing the repairs with pitch when a commotion pulled our attention to the city.

“Get on the ship...” Atlas commanded giving me a shove towards the rope ladder. It didn't take long before the dry dock was overran by armed men. I spared a glance over my shoulder as I reached for the ladder. Atlas was huddled behind the pile of rotten planks. Despite the fact he could reload and fire his gun a lot faster than the men shooting at us, he was still hopelessly outnumbered. As one man tried to flank him, I decided to do something truly stupid.

“ATLAS! Look out!” I screeched as I barreled towards him brandishing the hammer. One good conk and he was out cold on the ground.

“Nice hit, Kid. Now get over here!” With one solid yank I was behind the pile, though positioned squarely on Atlas's broad, strong chest. Now is definitely not the time to be appreciating his physique! I quickly rolled off him and made myself as small as possible while he shot over me.

“Who are these guys anyways?! They're not from the Inquisition!” I screeched as I held my ears.

“Might as well be! They’re Knights of saint John! The seaborne equivalent of the Inquisition. “

“But why are they shooting at us?! We aren't Muslims!”

“You think they care about stuff like that? Half their boats are manned by Christian convicts forced into servitude as their sentence!” Just as Atlas fired his last shot, and things were looking hopeless, one of the Asteri's cannons fired knocking most of the remaining Knights into the air.

“You're late!” Atlas yelled as he rolled over on his back and stared up at the ship.

“Better late than never!” Jaxon yelled back as he removed his hat and gave us a dramatic bow.

“Get on the ship. And stay on it this time.” Atlas gave me another firm shove and I took off running for the ladder again. Atlas on the other hand went running for the gate holding the water out of the dry dock. He quickly cranked the doors open as Nova manned the helm. I was barely able to out climb the rising water on the shifting, unstable ladder. When my feet finally found the deck again, my eyes searched for Atlas. At last, I saw him standing on the end of the seawall.

“He's not... Is he?” I wondered aloud, a question answered by him backing up a few steps and getting a runny go. Then he jumped landing on one of the rope ladders into the rigging. I let out an unsteady breath, though I'm not sure why I had been so anxious in the first place.

“I’m getting too old for this!” He grumbled as he tossed and turned until he was off the ladder. “Why are the Knights of Saint John after us?” He sighed as he trudged to the wheel, relieving Nova.

“It appears the Asteri and all its crew were branded as Muslims and members of the Barbary corsairs. There were wanted posters for us in town.” Nova explained the situation in a straightforward, level tone. The calmness of her voice did nothing to keep my heart from sinking into my stomach. The crew looked to me and I fidgeted with the astrolabe in my corset nervously.

“Do you have any idea what that thing is supposed to lead to?” Orion pressed me with a stern look.

“The inscription is coded, and I haven't been able to crack the code. I was able to figure out who made it and where he worked out of though. If I can get there I might be able to find a copy of the cipher.”

“Where?”

“Rhodes.” I answered excitedly. Atlas's normal scowl became even more irritated.

“Absolutely not!”

“It's not really that far from here! If we can figure out exactly what this astrolabe is for it will help clear all our names!” I pressed the issue, but Atlas wasn't budging.

“Rhodes is where the Knights of Saint John operate out of.” Atlas’s voice spoke volumes more than his words ever could.

“If nothing else we can use it as leverage to get what we need to get out of the Mediterranean until things die down.” Orion sighed. Atlas looked beyond done with the whole situation. “Do you know exactly where to go once we get there?”

“The town Archangelos on the eastern side.” Atlas heaved out another sigh when I said this.

“As long as you’re in and out quickly and avoid the castle it should be fine.” He was already moving to change our course. With Orion’s approval, I headed down to the cabin to plot our course. Anxiety played at my nerves as I charted our course. Atlas was a former Knight of Saint John, so he knew the island well. He wouldn’t have agreed so readily if he thought it would be extremely dangerous to go. His judgment had been sound so far and I was going to trust it when it came to this.

To be continued...

I’m just going to apologize now for the level of History nerdom that went into this. I tried to explain all the references as they appear, but if you have any questions or want more information on something, please feel free to ask.

I also apologize for the characterization being off. Atlas is not the type of character I normally write well, so I was trying to challenge myself. I will work on improving it as I finish the rest of this.

Thank you to the organizers of this event, to Voltage and the Lovestruck app developers, and everyone that went into creating the source material!

[thatlongspringnight]

Welcome to hell! 

tagging: @han-pan and @yoolee for encouraging me to do this.

TUNE IN THIS WEEK TO HEAR:

- My cat screaming

- Me talking about MLFK

- A discussion on the new MLFK route

- Me talking about Hiroki Eniwa

- soft discussion on my life

- Me fangirling over the SLBP event going on

- OKITA SOJI (”It happened in like, the 1800′s”)

- anxious laughter

- TAKEDA SHINGEN

- AND TB 

 I think that is it. :3 Also drunken me using the words “lackluster” and “equivalency”

[cavern-of-bells]

Masquerade/costume themed ask! Choose one of the following: The lords react to being invited to a masquerade/costume ball, what mask/costume would the lords wear, or which lords figure out who the MC is based on her costume. Bonus: how would the lords react to calling out the wrong person as being the MC!

This is gonna be based in a modern AU for a wider scope of options. Plus, pretty sure costume parties weren’t a thing back then.

Apologies for the lack of detail on Kojuro and Kenshin, and the absence of Shingen. I just couldn’t think of good costumes with masks for any of those dudes. Plus, Shingen does not strike me as one to wear costumes at all. You just know the only outfit he would wanna wear is his birthday suit. 😑

But!! I did do a bonus at the end! (One that had me cackling far more than what was reasonable.)

Tagging @tentori21 @otome-microwave @jane-runs-fast @bulbaqueen @dear-mrs-otome @duerme07 @han-pan @incubeebirb @yoolee @saizoswifey @sengokugenkigirl just because

Who else would Nobunaga dress as other than the devil himself? He goes all-out with his costume. Being the “Lord of Hell” is a nickname he embraces, and damn if he isn’t going to show it. He’s even hired people to dress as his minions and carry him around the party on a palanquin. Rather than find you himself, he sends someone to fetch you. “The devil’s wife should be beside him on his throne,” he smirks.

Mitsuhide is a huge dork and the notion that this kind of event is typically supposed to ooze sex appeal does not even cross his mind. He goes overboard with his giant Disney mascot suit of Winnie the Pooh. You spot him immediately. You just know that he’s the only one who would go to such lengths for such a thing, and you feel terrible for him, stumbling around like that. He is very pleased that you’ve found him, and asks you rather guiltily if you wouldn’t mind accompanying him for the rest of the party. It’s rather difficult to see out of the giant headpiece, and he would hate to ruin any more costumes by bumping into people and spilling their drinks.

Yukimura has a very difficult time choosing his costume. Just which Ninja Turtle is he supposed to pick to go as? He loves them all–this is torture, it’s practically Sophie’s Choice. He annoys the hell out of Saizo asking which one he should be. “Just pick the red one– you already have the headband.” Yukimura proceeds to debate with himself at Saizo regarding if Raphael is really the best choice. Saizo disappears in the middle of his rambling as soon as he gets the chance, leaving Yukimura confused and alone in his dilemma.

Saizo is going to be one of those jerks who doesn’t “do” costumes. If you can manage to bribe him into attending to begin with, the most effort he’s going to put into disguising himself would be to tie a bandanna around the lower half of his face. Yukimura of course will scold him that what he has can hardly be called a costume at all and that he has to do at least a little more than that. He inevitably wears him down and Saizo begrudgingly agrees to add a dollar store cowboy hat. “There, now you can say you’re a bandit!”

“Is that so.”

Once he arrives, he spots her within seconds. He doesn’t reveal himself to her, though– it might be a little fun to watch her struggle to find him for a while as he sticks to the shadows. He’d never say so, it tickles him to see her searching so intently for him. Only once he sees her shoulders slump in defeat does he decide to give his little lady what she wants, allowing her to discover him. Her smile suits her much better than that frown, after all.

Masamune is a pirate (KIDDING). Parties aren’t really Masa’s thing, and he’s pretty apprehensive about attending, especially when the premise of this party is to go anonymously– the notion of being all alone in that environment is pretty anxiety-inducing. He can’t say “No” to you though, so he decides to dress as the Phantom of the Opera because he kind of relates? You’re the one who spots him in the end, off in the corner, looking around nervously. Relief floods his face once he sees you approaching, and you thank him for doing this for your sake. You stick together for the remainder of the night. Afterwards, Masamune mentions that the party wasn’t so bad after all.

Kojuro decides to go as Zorro. There’s nothing more suitable for him (and for a masquerade) than the noble and sexy vigilante, plus the costume isn’t too difficult.

Hideyoshi goes as a mummy just for the versatility it will provide him in flirting. He waits for you to find him– when you do, he won’t give you a straight answer to whether it’s really him or not. Instead, he takes you to a side room and asks if you want to unwrap him to find out. You’re certain it’s him at this remark. You can practically hear the wink on his face and besides- only he would be able to say such a corny line and still be effective.

Inuchiyo goes as a horror movie villain. Can you imagine him doing anything else? You know this dude’s favorite part of Halloween is scaring trick-or-treaters, and he doesn’t see the point in getting a whole other costume just for one party. He spots you within milliseconds of arriving. Of course that’s you over there, asking the waiters a barrage of questions about the ingredients used in the hors d'oeuvres.

Ieyasu (I honestly can’t see this lil shit being anything but Joffrey Lannister), but for the sake of this HC, he will go as a Plague doctor! He chooses this costume as a little inside-joke for himself– being the one to administer poisons and “plagues” as such. He also likes the anonymity of the full mask. The last thing he wants to do is be forced to make chit-chat with any slobbering buffoon that recognizes him– it’s bad enough that he was dragged to this event in the first place. You’re going to be in for it as soon as he finds you, but one thing he seems to have not considered is how difficult it is to see out of one of those masks. He mistakes several people as you in his search, and when you finally approach him, he sulks and demands that the two of you leave that instant. He complains about the party you forced him to go to for years to come.

Mitsunari wants to know why you insist upon this insufferable dredge. He has better things to do than attend such a frivolous event. Once he learns Hideyoshi will be in attendance, however, his attitude toward attending does a complete 180°. He decides to dress up as his favorite character from his favorite Sci-Fi show. After the party he complains extensively about how ridiculous the whole thing was, but one day he accidentally leaves his browser open to a certain forum. It would seem the party had sprouted a love of cosplay within him– considering the number of LARPing communities it appears he has secretly joined.

Kenshin goes as The Nutcracker from the ballet of the same name.

Bonus: (The Magistrate)

There is only one thing a man of his charm and stature can be– the man of your dreams. He spends his evening scouring every inch of the party for you, with no luck, but he is not worried– star-crossed lovers such as yourselves are bound together by the red string of fate. True love always finds a way. Finally, he spots you from across the room. He would recognize that beautiful head of hair anywhere. He places a clammy hand on your shoulder. “Hoho, you provided me with quite the chase darling, but I knew you couldn’t resist your prince charming forever! I’ve finally caught you, my sweet", he whispers, wetly.

He is shocked to find that when you turn around, you are not in fact you, but that vile mongrel friend of yours in drag.

“SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKER!” Inuchiyo shouts, and delivers a solid punch to his face.

[yoolee]

On experience, consent, and writing fanfiction

Like a thousand years ago I made a post acknowledging that I tend to write the SLBP MC as somewhat inexperienced about physical shenanigans. I HAD MORE THOUGHTS an entire 7 page friggen 3700 word discourse on this subject – aka, experience, consent, writing and fiction and our influences, enjoying what we enjoy, etc.

I literally don’t expect anyone to read or respond to this, it was mostly an exercise in explaining my thoughts to myself (I am a TEXTBOOK INTP y’all, and all that stuff about “people with the INTP personality type tend to share thoughts that are not fully developed, using others as a sounding board for ideas and theories in a debate against themselves rather than as actual conversation partners.” ME.)

And it’s gonna come across weird probably BUT IT WAS USEFUL to me in clarifying stuff in my head and I’m posting it mostly because I can. I know y’all come here for the fics not the thought process and I’m 100% cool with that. Wrote this for my own brain, you can read or wait for the next fic TOTALLY COOL EITHER WAY. ABBREVIATED VERSION:

People have different life experiences and levels of interest and they are all okay! (and Voltage? Maybe mix it up a little XD)

People have different levels of confidence with different people at different times in their lives, and this is all okay!

You deserve to be with someone who goes out of their way to help you feel confident and excited!

You should also do your best to make your partner feel confident and excited, if and when you choose to have one!

GET AND GIVE CONSENT! Always! Multiple times during the process if you sense or hear ANYTHING resembling ‘no’, ‘stop’, or ‘wait’!

USE PROTECTION! When appropriate!

We write, read, and enjoy what we know and what comes easily!

That does not always mean it reflects what would be safe and healthy in the real world, and I think that is 100% okay if you recognize and acknowledge that and don’t normalize it with your writing!

All of this factors in to how yoolee writes MCs and fics in her random-as-hell rambly way of doing things!

·         ALSO I LOVE YOU ALL, carry on.

A LOT OF THOUGHTS ON THE SUBJECT:

Writing this with fem!MC because that’s all I have written so far, mileage may vary as that changes. Except on consent, all of the consent, everywhere!

On Experience, and the MC not having much

1.)    It’s something I think is character-specific, and for whatever reason I just tend to write for the ones that this seems more likely for even though it’s not my headcanon for all of them Let’s take Saizo, for example. His POV’s are littered with references to MC’s innocence. Can you be innocent and experienced—YES, YOU CAN, but I’m a lazy writer and also see point 5 below if you want which will explain more about his particular case.  With Yukimura, it’s just funnier if MC is (almost) as clueless as he obviously is and you’ll actually see that I flip around with Shigezane if I ever post my next fic with him, because I can see him with MCs all across the experience/comfort spectrum. And—pro tip—you can slide on that spectrum, folks. You can be inexperienced and confident, experienced and confident, experienced and not confident, and also next time be a little less or more confident, maybe it’s a bad time of week, idk, it depends on your mood and how people have treated you and hormones and other factors. Now, Kojuro’s MC, she feels confident to me and I love that. She is absolutely, in my headcanons, going to pull him into a linen closet, have her way, and not blush overmuch about it. Regardless of her experience level when they start, which is still probably going to be less than his just from an age-and-time-to-get-experience perspective, she is going to throw herself in with enthusiasm and catch up with confidence.  Yasu’s I picture as somewhere in the middle, and, like Yukkin, he and MC are going to be similar in that respect. He’s going to want to initiate sometimes and sometimes he’s going to just need some affection and sweetness and same is true for MC and they are going to muddle the hell of their way through. Inuchiyo’s MC? Inexperienced but not going to be embarrassed about it. If anything, she’s going to tell him he doesn’t tell her she’s pretty often enough. We all know he thinks she is the most gorgeous creature on earth without hyperbole bless you Toshiie you do not get enough love in this fandom some of that may be that REALLY BAD MOMENT in your story and some iffy writing choices all around in that route that I’ll get to on point 3 but I appreciate you recognize what you did and try really, really really hard to make up for it which is why I love you anyway And then we have Masa who I feel like is a very occasional thing. The physical is a small detail in a greater emotional connection, and if I wrote them, the focus would definitely be emotion (Shingen, conversely, would be physical, with emotional highlights either before or after but less pertinent during).

On the idea of experience situated in context:

2.)    It’s also world/story-specific – what I feel like works in SLBP-verse drives me friggin insane in modern-based apps I would NOT write Liar!’s MC the way I write SLBP’s. And I friggin love Liar’s! MC. I SO APPRECIATE when our modern MC’s are not quite as, er, flutteringly virginal?  MC being so works in SLBP for me, in part because—especially as an outsider to Japanese history, to my regret—it feels like fairy-tale and legend and myth to me, and the one-love destiny narrative fits my culturally-indoctrinated feelings about those kinds of stories (thaaaanks Disney). This thing that I write and see in SLBP stories, that sort of makes me feel soft and aww, drives me batshit crazy in games like KBTBB, MLFK, OTBS, BUM, etc etc. Like, real world, modern women have a much wider variety of experience and inexperience than, everyone’s-still-a-virg-by-their-first-real-job. Are some folks? Yes. Are ALL folks? No. Is one better than the other? OF COURSE NOT, I just like variety. THAT SAID I know players of the games skew on the younger side and when I remember that I’m much more okay with keeping MC innocent >>   Speaking of, in general, I tend to picture the SLBP MC as young. Not inappropriately so, but 18-20 (YES, that is YOUNG for the kind of relationship depth we see in these stories) and writing that age being a little insecure and a lot inexperienced is important for yoolee’s sanity and legality.

On consent 3.) SUPER IMPORTANT OLD AUNTIE LEE ADVICE FOLKS, K? (this is where we get a little preachy but hang with me please, I love you) Youngins, the whole 18+ thing is really, truly, not people just trying to be arbitrarily prudish. Please believe me on this. Both the reading-of and the act, there is legitimate and genuine science backing reasons to wait, and you are going to have your whole life to have fun with that if and when you so choose. And regardless, when and if you do choose to do so, it had better be with someone who is 100% willing to wait until you are comfortable, ready, enthusiastic and excited. You deserve that. Anyone who is not, anyone who makes you feel like it’s a condition to your relationship is not good enough for you period and end of story.  AND this goes both ways – don’t pressure your partner, don’t assume based on what media or movie bias tells you is ‘the norm’, and communication is important. If things seem to be headed in that direction and you’re ready, just, check-in and make sure they are too. It’s as simple as ‘are you up for (more/this/etc)’?

If you read my stuff, I hope that you notice that in every fic where the MC says stop, her partner stops. And sometimes even when she doesn’t say it, but expresses some visible or nonverbal hesitation (ie, what is implied to have happened pre-Compliments) there is still a timeout in that moment on the part of her partner. And if you don’t notice that, hopefully it’s because it feels like such a natural and normal part of the flow that it didn’t disrupt your thought process on what you were reading. Why? Because a partner saying ‘stop’ is a clear sign you need to stop and reconfirm consent (yes, you get to change your mind mid-act! Yes, you get to change your mind about something you were comfortable with yesterday and aren’t feeling today! And so does your partner, so you should both be understanding and accepting if there is a ‘stop’ involved or needed) and my feelings that stopping to double-check when you hear stop SHOULD be normal and expected comes out in this sense. What happens in most of my writing? MC gets her moment, decides she’s okay, and they continue. And she deserves that moment. And if she didn’t decide she was okay, fic would have ended.

Is it a little subtle sometimes in my writing? Yes. Saizo in particular will stop but generally doesn’t follow up with verbal affirmation. But I do write with undertones of checking for mutually understood nonverbal signals – verbal is always better, but I do think people (/characters) who have an already committed, longterm and physical relationship are quicker to catch nonverbal go/no-go’s—the consent is still there, just not as loudly spelled out for the reader.

Ironically, the piece of mine where this is most the case is Heights and that is a) my least favorite—and of course it’s my most popular, snrk—and b) one of those cases where I’m writing them as quite a bit of time into this, so there are consent checks, just not straight yes/no questions, BUT DON’T ASSUME IN REAL LIFE OKAY.

Compare Heights (implied, longterm physical and emotional history) with AKoaDK (where it’s clearly spelled out this is definitely a first for a lot of things). In the latter, I think the MC gives consent—nonverbal nodding to questions or requests, or actually explicitly giving a verbal yes or okay—at least FIVE times that I remember off the top of my head in 2000+ words, and that affirmation is important EVERY. TIME. Did you notice? Were you distracted by it? I dunno. Whether you did or were or not, it was there intentionally, and hopefully naturally, because it is that easy to weave in.

On fanfiction and the source material being, well, fiction:

4.)    That said, my preference for how I write is not a dictate on how I think others should, nor is it even 100% relevant to what I, personally, like to read. In other words – I feel like the responsibilities as a CONSUMER of content and a CREATOR of content are different. I have a frankly very guilty fondness for some of the fighting-ends-in-a-bed-or-against-a-wall-with-dubious-consent romance novel storylines, and my actual, personal reading preferences tend to skew to rough and straight up problematic themes. And I’m generally pretty comfortable with saying never feel guilty for the stories you want to read, or the stories you want to tell – fiction is a much safer, healthier way of exploring things that in the real world would not be safe, acceptable, healthy, or okay if it were happening to us or others.

I am also not young and not inexperienced XD soooo I have some perspective going into these stories. I also recognize I, personally, have control issues, and see ‘safe exploration’ above. I do think there is some truth, however, to putting what we want to see in the world into the world as content creators.

And I do think that, when we are inexperienced, what we read does shape our perceptions, even knowing that it’s fluffy escapism. And as much as I may personally enjoy some questionable fiction—and write it, depending on your tastes—which probably comes, in some extent, from the media I consumed and was introduced to before I was personally experienced, in which these behaviors were normalized, I like the idea of adding some content into our small little fandom world that helps, subtly or obviously, normalize stop-means-stop and consent as an easy, casual part of the process. My stories where this is less true I probably won’t put out into the world because even though I know where I’m coming from….meh. Just, I’d rather stick to what I put into the world being the way it is. More on the why of that below.

Even doing this, I’m grateful for writers with different tastes, experiences, perspectives and preferences. The rich variety in this fandom is one of the reasons I love it, and I LOVE seeing these other takes on relationships. It would be boring as heck if everyone wrote like me.

On Lee and her life and how that plays into how she writes MC:

5.)    Some real-world perspective (aka, we write what we know) – getting back to MC degree of confidence I am, overall, incredibly comfy in my body. I’m exactly average for an American girl weight-wise circa 2010, if not distribution-wise, which means quite a bit heavier than your international average.  And I wear a bikini with cheerful and enthusiastic pride, and I’m an ex-ballerina, so I have thought nothing of stripping to my skivvies in thirty seconds with sixteen stagehands around, or getting changed in semi-public places with my 501st friends who are a grab bag of ages and genders. As long as everyone around is 18 or older, I operate on a ‘it’s nothing they haven’t seen before’ scale and I have found that if you don’t make a big deal out of your body and not having clothes on it temporarily, and what it looks like in this state, literally no one else will either. It’s a nasty catch-22 that if you are nervous and fidgety about your muffin-top, and you go out of your way to not draw attention to it, that’s probably exactly what you’re going to do. Own it with confidence and don’t think about it and no one else will either. Not 100% there yet? Fake it until you make it, as they say, and I think you’ll find I’m right, in this case.  Another super cool aspect of that? It’s contagious. I don’t know about guys because I’m not one, but I will never forget being 14 in a bikini for the first time and being nervous and my best friend cussing for the first time saying eff it, let’s do this, I like how we look, and I felt like I owned the world. When you see someone enjoying themselves, not caring what others think, sometimes it’s easier for you to do the same – so hey, you can be an inspiration.

NOW WE GET TO TMI TIME FOLKS . I REALLY, REALLY MEAN THAT. I am literally about to allude to my personal sex life, folks, so move along, ye of younger eyes and/or uninclined to want to know about these things. SO. One very, happily, body-positive, confident yoolee, right?  Right! And yet! I still to this day get nervy as hell being n with my much-taller than and also much more fit than I boyfriend. It’s a little less each time, but still. Now, my body was like this when we started dating, and remains true, so it’s not like my body being what it is could be any kind of surprise to either of us. And nevermind that he tells me I’m beautiful, and amazing (he does, we actually have a rule he is not allowed to compliment me more than three times in a row because it’s embarrassing—yes, he is super sweet and I am insanely lucky) and has from day one, there’s just something about it that frazzles me. I suspect because, day to day, it’s about making myself happy and I have no problem doing that, but when I’m in a relationship, I want him to be happy too, and him saying he is isn’t the same as me KNOWING I am.

Does that make sense?  So yes, I do tend to color MC’s experience with mine here, particularly with some of my character favorites, and there’s some self-insertion here and the canon textual clues to support this always feel like they jump out at me in those stories, even when I blatantly ignore them in others—see Kojuro, above. Also worth noting, boy and I have been together a long time and we still check in, per my last paragraph in the last section. And I’ve said no sometimes, and he has too to certain things. And it’s nbd, we just cuddle and turn on Avengers or something. Life is good with communication, friends.

Triggery stuff And yes, as you can probably infer from my tendency to word vomit on the subject, I have experienced, personally, consent boundary issues on two occasions that ended in nonconsensual encounters. One of them was my first kiss, and some disturbing touching, which was taken from me when I was 13 but a stranger in his forties who followed me at a public event I was volunteering at for four hours, telling me he loved me and how tragic his life was, and was taken in exchange for not stalking me further. The other was jail-time and court-worthy though it didn’t come to that (because of course it didn’t, for other reasons) and the defense offered was directly tied to a perpetuation of media myth (playing hard-to-get, never give up on the dream girl, she’ll love you by the end of the movie, but you were nice to me so I thought) so if it seems like I am putting way too much thought into this, YES. I TOTALLY, COMPLETELY AM but—it does shape how I view this sort of thing—and, specifically, my role in potentially perpetuating ideas in fiction rather more strongly and with more depth than it may have otherwise.

I recognize that both of those encounters, perversely, contribute to the fiction I enjoy in some weird psychological attempt at normalizing what happened in a potentially unhealthy way – I’m sure I’m a textbook case. Because I recognize that, I’m not hard on myself for my preferences. ANYWAY.

These  encounters were also, I want to be clear, blips in my life that have not diminished my present health or happiness in any way—they just shape my perspective rather more immediately than it might have been without them.

OKAY IF YOU SKIPPED YOU CAN COME BACK NOW for a sidenote – I am not a professional writer. What you see on this blog is it. I don’t write for anything else unless it’s for work, and that’s not fiction, it’s training on leadership skills and stuff. I have not written fanfiction since like, the fifth Harry Potter book came out. The BOOK, not the movie. That was 2003. That was eighth grade for me. Good lord. And haven’t written fiction in general since one intro to creative writing class sophomore year of undergrad. I got a chemistry degree, folks, I wrote lab reports not romances (okay that would be such a good blog tagline tho) So I DO lean on that ‘what comes easy to me is what I know’ thing. What I don’t know, I google the heck and a half out of, but that’s much easier with the technical than the emotional. Good writers can summon up believable emotion they have not experienced or doesn’t casually interest them enough to imagine, and I still absolutely need practice with that. This is good for me in that sense, but you will notice that for all my talk of variety up above, I tend to write all emotion experienced in these situations pretty similarly. Gonna work on that.

…………………some day I will learn to express my thoughts succinctly. I have a lot of strong feelings about consent and confidence okay.  OH THAT REMINDS ME.

On BC:

6.)    BIRTH CONTROL  TOO, OKAY?

Okay, this is important and yet I don’t write about it much. BUT USE IT EVEN IF I DON’T WRITE ABOUT IT. Except with Saizo, if Iga can make truth serums they can make BC, fight me on that, and of all the samurai I firmly believe he is the one who will not risk MC get with child without a lot of coming to terms with things first, and if you see the MC drinking anything in my writing with him you can safely assume there’s an important powder in there, and if I don’t write it, IT HAPPENS ANYWAY, Little One being the…ironically obvious exception, but my point is that would not have been an accident, but a very, very calculated decision that he is still probably always worried about.

I also don’t think it has as much place in this narrative and story, because, legitimacy issues aside, preventing one, to me, doesn’t feel like it would be as much of a priority for these characters in a we-are-in-a-warzone-and-I-may-never-see-you-again time and place as it would for, say, the Scandal in the Spotlight protags, who reasonably have regular and easy access to modern, easy prevention and a vested reason for using it, namely that they have a lot going on without screaming babies adding to it.  SO I may not always write it in but you can generally assume that if I write anything modern, there’s some kind of BC whether that’s chemical or an off-screen.

If a couple is in a long-time, monogamous relationship and they are comfortable with and prepared for, financially, emotionally, etc for the possibility of offspring, different story. Otherwise – prevention, peeps. PREVEEEEENTION.

Okay.

I think that’s it.

This has been a stupidly long PSA from someone who overthinks this fanfiction stuff.

[that-otome-potato]

KEEP RAMBLING! YOOLEE! This is perfect in every way and I think I love Baby Demon hehe. Question though: Baby Deer and Baby Jokster... I think I know the parental, but I'm not sure. I mean, you mentioned Nobuyuki, but he could fit both haha. If you mentioned them before IM SORRY!! I just haven't paid as much attention as I should have :(

SLBP Next Gen OC Babble

UH warning for Major Character Deaths (that did not necessarily occur in game – but did in history), exactly zilch consideration given to reality when it comes to offspring. And, to be fair, exactly zilch consideration given to much of anything. I’m just writing. WHO KNOWS what will come out until it’s done. Know how in greek mythology Athena just banged her way straight outta Zeus’s head, fully formed? Mood. I feel you Zeusy. I do.

These don’t all exist in the same time/AU? Though I also overlap them willy-nilly as I please. FEEL THE SELF-DISCIPLINE. (It feels like nothing. Nothing at all). This isn’t all of them. Just the ones that my fingers needed to get out of their system. I’m just along for the ride. If I ever add the rest it’ll be to this post.

Keep reading