#yesterday me and my friend group went HAM and I don’t think i’ve ever wanted to kiss Zac as badly in my life as I do rn | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

purplesurveys · 4 years ago

Text

1001

survey by voicedance16

Name A...

Name yourself: I said this like, seven surveys ago. To make things different, I share my name with a bird and Rihanna’s first name.

Name (one of) your best friend(s): Angela. Sister for life.

Name 3 things in your fridge/freezer: We have a loaf of white bread, a near-empty bottle of Japanese mayonnaise, and a tub of liver.

Name a color you're wearing currently: Pink and orange. I ended up going to the virtual Halloween party at work - went as Dora - and it was a blast. I’m SO glad impersonating our characters didn’t turn out to be mandatory; I just sat there and was happy to be there, lmao.

Name the last thing you ate: A ham sandwich.

Name the last store you went to: Does the vet count? They sell pet food over there, so it’s kind of like a store I guess. I went last weekend because Cooper needed a heartworm test and a couple of shots.

Name the song you're listening to: Nada.

Name the artist of that song: See above.

Name your favorite animal: Dogs! Elephants are a close second.

Name what pets you have, if any: I have two dogs, an aspin and a beagle.

Name the town/state you live in: I won’t give away the city, but I will say Metro Manila is a literal stone’s throw away. I live right at the border.

Name something commonly ordered at Starbucks: Like...in general? I’m not aware of the most common food/drink ordered by other people but if I had to pick a guess, I know frappes are popular among my age group and the age group before us and that java chip is a popular flavor. But if you’re just referring to my usual, I like getting an iced caramel macchiato.

Name the last person you talked to in person: My dad. They gave us a box of Halloween donuts AND cake pops at work today :’) so I just asked my dad if he wanted a donut.

Name the last person you talked to on the phone: Mom. But my last call in general was a Zoom call with the entire company just a few minutes ago for the Halloween party.

Name the current day of the week: Today issss Wednesday.

Name the current month: October.

Name the current time: 6:55 PM.

Name the last movie you watched: I’m Thinking of Ending Things, blech. Need a happier movie to mention.

Name the last book you read: I’ve mentioned it too many times on a lot of recent surveys.

Name a place you've been on vacation: Bali.

Name a place you'd like to go on vacation: I desperately need to go back to Sagada, or at least Tagaytay. I think visitors are already allowed to go to the latter so I’m really eyeing a solo, soul-searching trip soon. As for places I’ve never been to before but would make for interesting vacations, I’d go with Chicago and Marrakesh.

Name 3 things you can see from where you're sitting: I can see an empty mug that used to contain coffee, a box of cake pops, and a purple pen.

Name your favorite musical: Miss Saigon.

Name an animal (any): The first animal that came to mind was dragonfly.

Name a fruit: Avocado, the only bitch in the house that I ever respected.

Name a vegetable: Broccoli, my favorite.

Name a common breakfast food: Where I live, beef tapa.

Name a color: Dandelion.

Name a type of flower: ...Dandelion!

Name a type of tree: Pine. Not that we have any here lol, but it’s the first kind I thought of.

Name a city: Uhh, idk. Let’s go with Seattle.

Name a state: I first thought of Wisconsin because I have a lot of family living there.

Name a country: Let’s go outside of the States and go with Sweden.

Name a continent: Asia.

Name a planet: Mars.

Name a girl's name: Clara. Such a pretty-sounding name.

Name the last person to comment you on Facebook: I haven’t had Facebook in weeks and I genuinely can’t remember from whom I received my last comment before I deactivated.

Name a clothing store/brand: Mango.

Name the last book you got at the library: It’s called History of the Filipino People, written by one of my great-uncles.

Name a restaurant: Max’s, even though their food sucks.

Name a grocery store: SM.

Name an iPhone app: Like, an Apple-exclusive app? I think Keynote is one of them.

Name an actor: Eddie Redmayne! One of my favorites.

Name an actress: Kate Winslet, my biggest crush through and through.

Name a music group: Destiny’s Child.

Name your favorite/lucky number: I don’t have a lucky number, but 4 is my favorite. I don’t have a solid reason for it to be my favorite; it just is.

Name something you've accomplished: Graduating college from my dream school in my (then-)dream degree/course.

Name something you'd like to accomplish: Travel, and travel a lot.

Name someone who makes you laugh: Andi made me smile and chuckle a bit today, so let’s name them.

Name something exciting coming up soon: Nothing too specific, really. But I’m supposed to be receiving my internship cut any day now and it’s gonna be my first salary ever, so that’s pretty exciting :)

Name a song that makes you emotional: 26 by Paramore.

Name one of your pet peeves: People who call without texting or notifying beforehand. Holy fucking shit. A hiring manager did this exact thing to me yesterday and I rejected her call because she did not text first. I honestly have no regrets, and I wouldn’t have been bitter if she stopped pursuing me then.

Name someone you know who is an amazing singer: Hannah, without a doubt.

Name someone who is the same religion as you: JM.

Name a holiday you celebrate: Christmas. I can hardly believe another one is coming up soon.

Name the last 4 digits of your phone number: Uh, no thanks.

Name one of your cousins: Sam.

Name a book you loved when you were younger: I used to really love the Septimus Heap series by Angie Sage and I reread the first book, Magyk, more times than I could ever count.

Name a song you loved when you were younger: Big Girls Don’t Cry - Fergie.

Name your favorite movie: Two for the Road.

Name a popular book series: The Hunger Games, even though I never actually read it.

Name a musical instrument: A song played on a solo saxophone...

Name a language: German.

Name what other tabs you have open: On this window, just Bzoink. I just closed a YouTube tab.

Name 3 things on the walls of the room you're in: Audrey Hepburn wall decors, a painting that I’m trying to cover up with post-its to turn it into something positive, and uhhh my aircon is mounted to the wall if that counts lol

Name your house number: I’m not sharing that.

Name your high school: It’s an all-girls Catholic school in my city. I’ve shared the name before but I don’t feel like doing so tonight.

Name your college, if applicable: My college was in mass communication, but I went to university in UP.

Name your middle school: See high school.

name your elementary school Again, see high school.

Name the college you wish you went to/hope to go to: UP.

Name your favorite teacher: My music teacher throughout high school. I don’t like her subject, but I love her.

Name the color of your backpack: I haven’t had to use a backpack in a while but my main one is pink.

Name a dessert: Creme brulee. I don’t memorize which letters have those accent marks and I don’t feel like looking that up right now.

Name a famous landmark: Because I can clearly read the next question, the Statue of Liberty.

Name a place you might go in NYC: I’d go straight to my uncle’s so that he can show me the good spots. He has a lot of cool friends who run their own bars/restaurants in the city so if anyone knows how to have a good time in NYC without having to go to all the big tourist places, it’s him. GOD I can’t wait to go to New York.

Name an inventor: Hedy Lamarr.

Name an article of clothing: Scarves.

Name an ice cream flavor: Mint chocolate chip, yum.

Name a religion: Buddhism.

Name an emotion: Resentment.

Name a room in your house: My bedroom, because that’s where I’m staying in at the moment.

Name a website: Wikipedia.

Name a car: This is pretty vague. A kind of car? Hatchback. Are you looking for a make? Toyota. Or maybe a specific model? Honda Civic. I gotchu.

Name something you need to do today: SLEEP. I should not be awake at 11 PM.

Name someone you admire: Andi.

Name someone you miss: At the moment, nobody.

Name a part of the body: Elbow.

Name the last youtube video you watched: I bawled my eyes out to a video playing the audio to Ben&Ben’s Kathang Isip because that song makes so much goddamn sense and is relatable now. Can’t I just go back to a simpler time when that song was just fun to listen to and wasn’t actually relevant to my life? I hate music sometimes.

Name a quote you love: I don’t have one.

#survey #surveys #this was a challenge to make entertaining bleh

4 notes · View notes

philjacobsen-blog · 5 years ago

Text

Antarctica. How I learned to stop worrying and love the isolation.

I put on my gloves and face mask like I had done every day for the past six months. I wanted to protect myself, be safe and I wanted to be healthy. No, I wasn’t a prepper preparing for the end of the world and/or the coronavirus, I lived in Antarctica.

From 2002 to 2018, I spent over six years of my life working and living in Antarctica. Math might tell you that looks like “16 years,” but Antarctica works on a different schedule.

Scientists and contract laborers (like myself) have been limited to work a maximum of 14 months straight in Antarctica. Because, after 14 months of isolation, it has been said, “You might lose your mind.” Therefore, four weeks, six weeks, or eight weeks of coronavirus quarantine is like a walk on the frozen ocean.

Everyone loves Top 10 lists, but first, here is the background of life in Antarctica.

There are two different seasons in Antarctica: summer and Winter. For the laymen, that’s when it’s light 24 hours a day (summer) and then when it’s dark 24 hours a night (Winter). It’s not by accident that “Winter” is capitalized and “summer” is in lowercase. This is because you need to respect Winter.

I have spent four Winters in Antarctica. While there have been changes to the Winter schedule, when I Wintered in Antarctica at McMurdo Station, the largest of the three American bases on the 7th Continent, a plane with all of our friends, hopes, dreams and escape plans left in February. The next time we would see the lights of a plane in the sky would be in August.

In other words, shit got real when that last plane left. We had to trust we had enough food, talent and toilet paper to last us until the end of August. This is because, as the saying goes, “If we don’t have it, then you don’t need it. And, you don’t need it, because we don’t have it.”

If you run out of chicken, then you eat pork. When you run out of pork, you eat lamb, when you run out of lamb, you eat hamsters--hamsters are, what we called, microwavable breaded (or deep fried) ham and cheese Hot Pockets™®.

In other words, the grocery stores are open; quit panicking. When you’re outside, hoping your squirrel trap has been bountiful today, this is the time to panic. However, today, it’s not minus 45 degrees outside. Walmart will be restocked soon, put on your mask and gloves and purchase only what you need. Then go home.

And, if Walmart is out of toilet paper, hook a garden hose to your faucet and clean your ass, and be happy your water supply doesn’t give you frostbite.

It’s going to be fine.

In Antarctica, we were living like it was Gilligan’s Island, “No phone, no lights, no motorcar, not a single luxury.” The only difference was we had phones, lights and motorcars, but when we went outside it was minus 45 –degrees—not a luxury. Stay inside on your couch and be happy that when you do go outside to take out the trash, walk the dog or mow your lawn, you’re not getting third degree frostbite and having your toes cut off.

This little piggy went to the market. This little piggy watches Netflix. This little piggy stays home.

Speaking of movies and TV shows, my good God, we would have loved to have had Netflix, bootlegged versions of Game of Thrones, YouTube or Facebook in Antarctica. Instead, the entirety of McMurdo’s bandwidth is mostly for Science.

Rarely could I “LOL” with my friends on Facebook or “YOLO” with spring breakers at the beach. Nope, Science is the priority in Antarctica.

Science, I tell you. A bunch of people, who we called “Beakers,” is the entire reason McMurdo Station exists. These Scientist are in Antarctica to prove or disprove Global Warming and/or can penguins fly and/or are penguins cute. Generally, they proved it, but why listen to scientists?

Scientists went to school and studied stuff, but have they ever studied the “economy” or “Facebook?” Can you imagine an entire community who listens to scientists? Oh wait, you can? Possibly because we’re in a global pandemic? Yeah, listen to scientists?

During my Winters in Antarctica, I could go days and only see the one person who I worked with, and guess what? I hated him.

In the community, we called him “Skin Suit.” This was his nickname because, even though he passed his battery of psychological examinations, which are required in order to Winter-Over in Antarctica, he said to Suzy—a la “Silence of the Lambs.”

“I wish I could wear your skin, so I could touch you all day.”

So, there I was, working at the bottom of the world, with Jame “Buffalo Bill” Gume as my coworker for six months, in total darkness, and do you want to know how I got along with him (aside from the one time I threw hot coffee in his face)? I complimented his outfits. I tried to look for the positive in the people who surround me.

My first job in Antarctica, I was a dishwasher. I left my home, friends and a girlfriend to seek this adventure. I’m still happy with two out of three of those decisions.

The first year I spent in Antarctica there was a “Dishwasher Emergency” at the South Pole (850 miles from the sea level solitude of McMurdo). Just like we need grocery store employees, drive through food and universal health care, the South Pole needed a dishwasher—and they chose me.

The South Pole is located at 9,301 feet above sea level. That’s not very high. When I live my life in my hometown of Salt Lake City, I live at 4,327 feet above sea level. I have climbed high mountains in Utah, like Mt. Timpanogos that is 11,752 feet and Mt. Nebo that is 11,928 ft. I’m not healthy, but I’m also not fat.

When I was asked to work at the “high altitude” of 9,301 feet of the South Pole, I said, “Okay. I’ve done that.”

However, what I didn’t know, was that because the South Pole is at “The South Fucking Pole” it’s not just about the altitude. The South Pole has a variance of altitude because of the Earth’s centrifugal force which makes the South Pole seem much higher than the actual 9,301 feet. At times it can feel, because of lack of oxygen, as though you are over 12 or 13 thousand feet.

Before going to the South Pole, the doctors and scientists said I should take “prophylactic acetazolamide” to combat the feelings of high altitude sickness. However, my friend Donald said, “You’ll be ‘okay.’” He said that since he was from Colorado and I was from Utah, that I would be fine, because I was “use to the high altitude.”

I was at the South Pole for eight days. I quit taking prophylactic acetazolamide on day four, because I was feeling great. I listened to Donald.

On day eight, I nearly died. This wasn’t Utah. Because I’d lived at sea level for four months at McMurdo Station, and Donald didn’t know shit, my pulse oximeter (the amount of oxygen which should be in my blood and close to 100) was 52. I was failing breathing.

Pulmonary edema cut the oxygen supply to my brain making me think 3 + 7 = Cat. The South Pole doctor said, “Phil, you are two to four hours from death.”

All flights to the South Pole were canceled on this day, due to weather, but, due to “2 to 4 hours of death,” a C130 National Guard Airplane risked their lives and flew from McMurdo Station to rescue me at the South Pole. If not for universal Antarctica Health Care, I could be dead.

On this day, I learned I needed to listen to the scientists, and not to Donald.

This story ended up being too long. I’m sorry. I’ve lived through isolation, listened to friends, instead of the medical community, and somehow I’m still alive. How did Antarctica prepare me for the isolation of the coronavirus?

1: Do something today better than you did yesterday. Did you go to bed sooner? Wake up earlier? Brush your cat?

2: Exercise. In Antarctica my exercise routine was called, “Brushing the Dust Off of David.” There is no reason to take a hammer and chisel to David. All you need to do is to take a wet cloth and brush off the dust. Do 10 sit ups, pushups, or jog in place. Be happy with who you are, and barely maintain. If you set higher expectations, you might fail. Simply, brush the dust off of your personal David.

3: Do something better today than you did yesterday. There were many times in Antarctica I got more drunk on Friday than I did on Thursday. I’m not advocating alcoholism, but lower your expectations. Don’t look for perfection when a glass of wine might do.

4: Did you make your bed after you woke up? Some days you will go to bed and your biggest accomplishment will be, “I made that bed today.” Congratulations.

5: Groundhog Day. Every day may seem like yesterday, but, how did you make it different? In Antarctica, after six months of Winter the trash shelves are lined with “Learn ‘This Language’ in 30 Days” DVDs. Nobody accomplishes a lot during the isolation of Winter. But, if we do little, then that is a lot.

6: Communication. Does your phone work? In Antarctica, no one can call us, so we have to call out. Instead of waiting for ‘that phone call.’ Make it.

7: Don’t go outside. It’s too cold. In the Covid-19 case, it’s too dangerous. My dad goes to dialysis three times a week; please don’t kill him. Don’t go outside.

8: Appreciate your pets. In Antarctica we are not allowed to have pets. I started the “Antarctica Cat Club.” All we did was share photos of our cats from home that we wished to be with. Now, we get to live a cat’s life. Nap. Eat. Shit. Nap. Clean. Nap. Eat. Repeat.

Love your pets you lucky sons of bitches.

9: Art. Be creative. Rather you’re by yourself or preferably, with only yourself. Do something artistic. For instance, today, I chose to write this Manifesto. In Antarctica a group of us recreated the (drunk) history of the race to South Pole by Roald Amundsen and Robert Scott (https://vimeo.com/35084075). What will you or your isolated group create?

10: Know that it ends. A plane will come and take you away or scientists will tell you it’s safe to go outside. And then, it’s over. You take off your mask and gloves. You shop at a grocery store, you go to a movie, you hug your parents or, you love being able to hold those who you love.

Stay warm. Stay isolated. And, stay indoors.

3 notes · View notes

korra-the-red-lion · 3 years ago

Text

Unnatural Affairs. Chapter 14: Thanksgiving

(Ally + Lyn)

Ally.

You know that when you wake up with a pit of dread in your stomach, that today is just not going to be your day at all.

I stared up at the ceiling for a very long time before mom knocked on my door and told me that grandma would be here in just over an hour, so I needed to be showered and ready for her arrival. I loved my grandma very much, I really did, but if dad was bad about the whole ‘talks to dead people thing’ than she was worse.

There was a time when she was over and overheard (I swear she was listening in though) my parents talking about what they would do with me. She immediately sprayed me with water, I’m not kidding. She claimed it was holy water but I’m 99% she just used tap water instead. Nana, my grandma on mom’s side of the family, didn’t care all that much, but dad’s mother was horrible about it all. And don’t even get her started about when I stopped going to church. If I wasn’t going to burn in hell for speaking with the dead, I was going to because I stopped visiting the Lord every Sunday.

At least she didn’t care that I was gay.

With a sense of impending doom, I rolled out of the safety of my bed, grabbing some nice clothes from my closet to change into. I took a quick shower, enough to get off the morning stink. As I was putting my lotion on, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of worry for Lyn and Michael. Lyn because she didn’t call last night, plus she was clearly upset about something yesterday. Michael because that was the second time Amelia visited his dream and I was worried it was leading to something a lot more sinister.

I planned on asking her once we spoke, but I was curious to know if anything like that happened to Amelia before her death. I even thought about asking Jamieson as well, even though I still found him to be annoying. They were my biggest leads, regardless of if I wanted them to be or not. My worry was if they had unwanted spiritual visits… was Michael the next target?

That thought kept me up for a good chunk of the night. I didn’t want to add to his own worries, but I couldn’t shake that thought once it burrowed itself deep in my brain. Overthinking was my specialty after all.

It was probably wrong, but if there was even a slim chance of it being true, I needed to know. Just another thing to my ever-growing list with no answers. Hey, on the plus side, no one could ever say I procrastinated again. I just chose where my focus lies, that’s all. Nothing wrong with deciding a murder mystery that really has nothing to do with you is something I should spending all of my time on. Maybe there was a little tiny bit of guilt when I thought about all my schoolwork piling up, but my parents would be none the wiser as long as I pass all my classes.

Suppressing the urge to groan, pull my hair out, and cry all at once, I felt like I was ready to face my family for the day. I did quickly send a “Happy Thanksgiving!” in the group chat before heading down. I hope the others did have a nice day. I sent one to Mags and Sarah too. There, every friend I’ve made so far, and I could count them all on one hand. That was more than my friends in high school, in which I could count on one finger. To be honest, I was happier with a small group of friends.

I went down the stairs where Wallaby met me with his big doofy dog grin. I scratched behind his ears before going into the kitchen, where he followed with a wag of his tail. There was no way I wasn’t sneaking him into the car tomorrow. Mom and dad would never notice.

The counter was already covered in a variety of foods for tonight. Mom had a ham ready to go in the oven, since we all hated turkey. The pies were made, the ingredients for the salads were spewed across the counter. I glanced at the clock, noting that it was only 1:00. Okay, early supper. I snuck an apple off the counter before mom noticed so she didn’t get annoyed for me eating before a huge meal, but I hadn’t had breakfast yet, I was starving.

“I saw that,” mom said without taking her eyes off her apple slicing.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, mother,” I said innocently, batting my eyelashes.

“You’re lucky that you’re the only daughter I have. Open that for me, please.”

I did what she asked and helped out a bit even though there wasn’t a lot for me to do. I stiffened when I heard the door open and grandma’s voice drift down the hallway. Mom looked at me with concern before rubbing my back gently. “You\re going to be okay. I haven’t said a word about what happened to you in the bookstore except to your dad, and he knows better than to tell his mom.”

Wallaby rubbed his wet nose against my hand to also calm me down. I nodded, swallowing the lump that was rising in my throat. It was just one meal I had to get through, then I could go back to the safety of my bedroom. I can do this.

Grandma Holland walked into the kitchen, surveying it with a critical eye before settling her stare onto me. I awkwardly waved and smiled as she walked over to me, giving me a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

“Oh, Alexandra, you look so much older now,” she said affectionately, patting my cheek.

“It’s only been a few months, grandma,” I said embarrassed.

“Still, you just look more confident in yourself,” she remarked.

Did I? I didn’t feel more confident…but maybe because I actually was doing something that really mattered to me, it was changing how I was carrying myself? Too bad it was a secret that I could never share with them, because it would only break their hearts. It was like Buffy lying to Joyce about her Slayer powers for so long. It really put a strain on their relationship. It wasn’t often that media portrayed how it hurt so much to lie. It was like a gnawing guilt that ate away from the inside, leaving you feeling empty and hurt. I felt my guts twisting as I smiled at my grandma, catching my dad’s eye from the door. I was lying to all of them, only because I knew how it would end if they ever found out. The thought of that rejection hurt more than any guilt I was feeling.

Maybe once it was all over I could tell them, but for now it was my little secret. Mentally shaking my head, I left the room to quickly scarf my apple down before helping mom with the rest of supper. The longer I could avoid talking to grandma and dad together, the better.

The hours sped by like seconds. One minute the ham was going into the oven, next minute it was coming out as we all gathered around the table for supper. Unfortunately, Wallaby was not allowed at the dining table during this meal, since grandma didn’t like when we had him nearby while she was eating. The look in his eyes when I locked him up in the basement was one of utter betrayal. I’m sorry fluffy baby, I hope you can forgive me.

The feeling of tension refused to leave my shoulders and jaw as we made our way through the meal. I don’t know why I was feeling so anxious. I know my grandma upset me sometimes, but she hadn’t really done anything to trigger me. I just really wanted to get through this supper in one piece, that’s all.

Then came Thanks.

We always did it after supper but before dessert. I don’t why, we just did it that way. Dad went first, like always. He cleared his throat before taking a sip of water, only to clear his throat again.

“I’m thankful for my wonderful wife, Ellen, who has put up with me for years,” he started off, giving mom a look of utter adoration. “I’m not sure where I would be without her. I’m also thankful of my daughter, who started her first year away from home to go to school. I’m extremely proud of you, baby girl. I know how hard it was for you, and I miss you more each day you’re gone,” he said, smiling at me with tears in his eyes. I felt myself tearing up too.

Mom reached over to take his hand, kissing his knuckles lovingly. “I’m thankful for you too, Patrick. My life has been full of love and laughter ever since I met you. And I’m thankful for my wonderful daughter, Alexandra,” she reached over with her other hand, taking mine in hers, “who has gone through a lot of scary things in her life but is always to take the first step forward. You made me a better person by being born, and you challenge me to be better each day. I love you.”

God, Thanksgiving always made me so teary eyed. My parents were such saps. I wiped at my eyes with the back of my hand, taking a moment to gather my thoughts. “I…I’m thankful for my family and their good health. I know we always don’t see eye to eye, but I can’t imagine any other family for me. I’m thankful that I was given the chance to go to such a nice university and met all kinds of awesome and lovely people. I’m thankful for everything that I have,” I finished lamely, trying hard to keep my voice steady. My face was flushed from nerves, my hands trembling. Mom squeezed my hand tightly with comfort, smiling at me.

“Goodness, you people are so emotional,” grandma said with a chuckle. “I’m thankful that you’re all well. I’m thankful that I’m in a happy place and that my son found the love of his life. And I’ll be thankful once my granddaughter gives me great grandchildren.”

“Grandma!” I laughed. “Sorry to disappoint, but I don’t think that will be happening anytime soon.”

“Adoption is a thing, my dear,” she replied airily.

Okay, phew. The worst of supper was over with. Dad got up and brought over the dessert. My mouth watered at the sight of the apple pie, the strawberry rhubarb pie, and the banana cream pie. I took a piece of each. I’m sure I was going to live to regret that later, but that was an issue for Ally of tonight, not the Ally of now. The Ally of now just really wanted pie.

The rest of the evening was spend talking about random things. Of course, I got a ton of questions about school and the people I met. I was really proud of myself for not blushing (too much) when I talked about Lyn. Practicing my poker face was really paying off. Everything was going really well until my grandma asked me if I was participating in any extracurriculars.

I stopped then, before shaking my head quickly. She raised her brow at me, looking over her glasses. “Now, don’t lie. You must be up to something.”

“Uh…not really. I-I just mostly go to class or study in my room, or watch movies with my roommate,” I said uncertainly.

“Well,” she hummed, “as long as you’re staying out of trouble, then.”

I tensed but chose to keep my mouth shut. Dad stepped in by saying, “She is, mom. You know that she doesn’t like to have that kind of attention.”

I could feel my heartbeat in my ears. I forced myself not to bite my lip as I focused on my breathing. I know dad didn’t really mean anything by that comment, but I knew exactly what he was talking about with ‘that kind of attention.’

“That’s good to hear,” said grandma. “I wouldn’t want her getting into all that supernatural nonsense that she was getting into when she was younger. It’s unnatural and unbecoming, if you ask me.”

“Mom, c-can I be e-excused?” I asked shakily, trying very hard to keep my tone steady. Mom looked at me with concern before nodding. I bolted out of the room, racing upstairs as fast as my shaking legs would let me. I managed to make it to my room before the tears fell. I know I should be used to it by now, but somehow it always hurt when they said it. Maybe I was overreacting, but right now I just needed to stay away from that. It was too much for me. I hated being blamed for something I literally couldn’t control.

I was finally feeling good about it, too. I was helping people. I was going to help those people move on and stop whoever who was killing people from doing it again. I only ever used it for good reasons, so why was I always the bad guy? It was just so painful to be see as a monster in the eyes of people who are supposed to love and care for you.

XXX

Lyn.

I smoothed out the wrinkles of my skirt. I stared into my mirror, my own miserable face staring back at me. I hated dressing up like this if I could avoid it. I was way more comfortable in a pair of sweats or jeans. A skirt and blouse just weren’t me. But mum requested that I looked nice for supper, so here I was. Even my braid felt tighter than usual, and I usually wore that thing pretty fucking tight. I checked my make-up on more time, making sure there wasn’t a single smudge on my face before stepping away, satisfied that it would please her.

I just needed to make it through this horrible night, then Olivia would take me back tomorrow first thing. I was doing this for her, so I was going to try my best so we could mend that bridge. I didn’t want to end up like those poor ghosts, feeling lost and alone because they had no one left.

With a heaving sigh, I plastered on my fake smile and left my room. I made sure there was no way mum or dad could say anything negative about my appearance today, so that just left every other little thing to nitpick instead. Yay.

My stomach was turning over in nervous energy as I descended the staircase. I felt awful about everything that went down between me and Leigh yesterday, and I hid from her all day. I snuck out of the house to talk with Stanford, then hid in my room for the rest of the day. I had to leave our chat early because my mum came knocking and wanted to know why I missed supper. Although I hated seeing that cold look of disdain, it was still better than seeing Leigh.

I also didn’t call Ally last night. I did it the first time because I really wanted to make sure she was okay, but then I kept doing it. At first, I thought it was because I was worried about her, then I realized at some point it was for my benefit. Listening to her talk about random things calmed me down, helping me sleep a little better. I was still having nightmares about a lot of things, but they were getting better. Ally had been handling this kind of junk since she was a little kid, so I felt like I needed to stop letting it hold me back. I don’t know if it’s because growing up I wasn’t supposed to show a lot of weakness or whatever, but not being able to control the situation at hand was making everything worse. I needed a way to keep this all under control without resorting to medication, and Ally was my fix.

Was it unhealthy? Was I so focused on what made me feel better that it was never about how she felt? It just made me feel even more disgusting. Was I really just like my mum? Using people to move myself forward in the world? The thought of that alone made my skin crawl. I tried so hard not to be like her.

I was so lost in my depressing thoughts that I never even heard Olivia until I nearly walked into her. She put her hands out to stop me from completely bowling her over.

“What’s bothering you, Lyn?” she asked, her face scrunched up in concern.

“Nothing,” I said automatically.

She sighed as she gently pulled me away from the dining room where I was heading. She led to me the coat room, closing the door behind her. Olivia clasped her hands in front of her face, pointing them at me.

“Lyn,” she started with a calm tone, “I need you to be straight with me here.”

“That’s physically impossible.”

“Don’t get smart with me.”

I shrugged, looking away. “We need to head to the dining room, mum and dad are probably waiting.”

“They can wait a bit longer,” said Olivia. “I can see that look in your eyes. Something is eating at you. What’s going on?”

“Noth-” I stopped when Olivia glared fiercely at me.

“Cut the crap, Lyn. You may be a lot of things, but a good liar isn’t one of them.”

I sighed, resisting the urge to run my hands through my hair. “I just- I got into a fight with Leigh yesterday. It was totally my fault and I don’t really want to see her right now.”

“I doubt that,” said Olivia with tone of disbelief. “I’m going to assume that you and Leigh got into a fight because you��re both stubborn asses.”

“You’re one to talk,” I muttered under my breath.

“Sorry? Olivia laced her voice with fake sweetness. “I am one to talk, actually. We’re all stubborn as oxen. Plus, I’ve been in my fair share of arguments between you and her. Seriously, we put the ‘dys’ in dysfunctional, with all the spiteful words we say to each other. What was the fight even about?”

Good thing I spoke Olivia, because most people would be utterly confused by that whole ‘dysfunctional’ bit. I understood that she was saying ‘dys’ as ‘diss’, but it still took my brain a few seconds to comprehend what she just said. When it finally clicked together, I noticed that she was staring at me expectantly. She asked me a question, didn’t she? I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing wanted to come out, so I settled for a shrug.

Her eyes narrowed. “Lyn, I really fucking hate when you do that, you know that? Based on the fact that you don’t feel like telling me suggests that she saw those hideous cuts on your arm.”

I nodded slowly in conformation. “She wanted to know where they came from. I told her it was a bear.”

Olivia shook her head. “Rookie mistake. You know she’s seen her fair share of bear attacks…which is very strange to actually say out loud, I admit. Anywaaaay,” she patted my arm lightly, “I don’t know what went down between you two, but it will be okay. I mean, look at us. Once we both put in a little effort not to be assholes to each other, we get along pretty well.”

“But I’ve never really gotten along with Leigh like I have with you,” I said sullenly. “She’s always been so perfect…and I’m just a hotheaded mess.”

“Okay,” Olivia clicked her tongue, “stop the pity party, please. Come on, let’s get this supper over with.” She went for the door, only to pause there for a minute.

“Uh, you okay?” I asked in confusion.

Olivia looked over her shoulder and smiled softly at me. “I just wanted to say thank you. I know that it wasn’t easy for you to come back here after what happened last year…it means a lot to me that you’re here because of me.”

I looked at her for several minutes of heavy silence, so much that she started fidgeting. I finally walked into her space and engulfed her in a big hug. Olivia relaxed, probably unaware of how tense she had been, hugging me back.

“I hate it here,” I said quietly, almost as if I was talking to myself. “I hate the person I become when I’m here. I hate the person I was because of this place. But I’m here because of you. I wanted to try and fix our relationship, because I learned a while ago how important it was to have people who care for you in your life.” I pulled away, looking into my sister’s eyes. “Maybe you don’t care as much as I do about how we were abused, but I’m not going to let them destroy this for us.”

Olivia didn’t say anything, but I could see the emotion in her eyes. Finally, she gave the slightest of nods as she patted my face affectionately. “Thank you, Lyn… Jesus, let’s go get some supper before I start bawling, idiot.” She turned away with a sniff, leaving the coat room. I took a deep breath and followed after her.

It wasn’t much but having that little bit of acknowledgement felt good. It was so horrible feeling like you were the only one who hated how we were treated growing up. Like I said to Ally, Olivia was quicker to forgive them than I was, but that was just her personality. She never took much to heart. She was a businesswoman like mum was in that way. She was able to compartmentalize her emotions into little boxes, so she could keep her focus and edge. I wasn’t like that. I was driven by my emotions. I’m not able to keep things lock inside forever. Eventually they would come bursting out like a dam being released, and anyone in my way would be swept in the rush. That’s why I finally lost my shit at Frankie at the Halloween Bash last year and decked him across the face. I hollered at Loryn and Jackie, until I finally told Loryn what happened here. After that I tried my best to never let me get to that point again, yet here I was doing the same thing again. I told myself I would be okay, that I would be able to handle it better. So far, I got into a fight with my sister and hid away in my room for a whole day. Overall, my coping has been dreadful thus far.

We walked into the dining room together, where they were all waiting for us. My eye caught Leigh’s, and we both turned away in shame. Or at least I did, maybe she didn’t. I took my seat at the table, making sure my hideous fake smile was in place. I could feel mum’s hawkish stare on me, but I couldn’t bring myself to look at her right now.

The cook brought in the food, setting it all on the table. We all waited patiently as they brought in the turkey, mashed potatoes, greens and all the other foods. It all seemed so wasteful to me. I put all the food I could muster onto my plate and waited until mum gave the a-okay to eat. Finally, she gave the table a curt nod and we dug in.

I was hoping to get through this meal without saying a word, but I wasn’t so lucky. About halfway through mum put down her glass of wine and looked over at me again with that same intense stare. I slowly put down my fork, turning my attention to her.

Her lip quirked upwards in something resembling a smile. “Lyndsey, I couldn’t help but overhear you on the phone or something the other night when you missed supper. Were those your friends from the team?”

A flurry of lies filtered through my head, but I knew that this was a test from her. I spent the whole summer here either at my summer job or talking to Loryn, Jackie, or Kerry on the phone. Slowly I shook my head.

“I didn’t think so,” she said casually, picking up her knife. She cut through her turkey meat before looking my way again. “Who were they?”

My heart stuttered in my chest, but I forced my voice to stay even. “Some new friends, not on the team.”

“Actually mum, did I tell you about this new project I was working on?” Olivia cut into the conversation. I sent her a grateful look, but mum held up her hand, her eyes still on me.

“Olivia, please don’t interrupt your sister. I’ll hear about this project in a minute. I want to hear about these new friends.” Her tone brokered no argument. Olivia slunked down her in seat, her eyes saying sorry, I tried.

“They’re nobody, mum,” I said, my voice clipped.

“Watch your tone,” dad said curtly.

“Sorry,” I ducked my head. I picked at my food, hoping to the fucking lord above that this was nearly over. I just wanted to go back to my room and throw on some music, to help me forget this whole conversation. “They’re just some friends, that’s all.”

Mum put down her knife as she chewed her food thoughtfully, though her eyes were coldly calculating. They flickered between me, Olivia, and Leigh a couple of times before settling on Leigh. For a minute, Leigh acted as if she took no notice to the sudden attention, but the façade was over quickly as her brows drew together in concern. She looked up from her meal and looked politely startled.

“Yes, mum?”

Resting her chin in her palm, mum tapped one finger against her cheek in thought. “Leigh, what was it that had you so upset yesterday? You weren’t yourself at supper.”

Both Leigh and I stiffened. Her eyes found mine for a brief second before they shot back to mum’s. “Um-” she cleared her throat awkwardly. “It was nothing, really. It’s already been settled.”

“Has it?” her eyebrows shot up in question. “How interesting, seeing as how you haven’t spoken to Lyndsey since then.”

My stomach was churning, and it felt like I ate lead. I pushed away from the table to excuse myself, until dad said sternly, “Stay in that seat, Lyndsey.”

“No thank you,” I took in a shuddering breath. “I’m not feeling well.”

“It wasn’t an option, dear,” mum turned to look at me, indicating that I should sit back down. I did as she instructed, trying very hard to keep my nerves under control. I ended up cracking my fingers under the table, to help with my anxiety. Mum leaned back in her chair, crossing her legs as she rested her elbow on the seat of the chair, chin balanced delicately on her fingers. The whole atmosphere was tense and anxious. Olivia shifted in her seat, trying very hard to look indifferent. Leigh was stock still, her face not giving anything away. I looked down at my socks, trying hard to keep my face impassive as well. A passed down trait to all the Hart women, I suppose. We knew when our poker faces were necessary, and this was one of those times.

“Ward, leave me with the girls for a minute,” mum said coolly, her voice business-like. Dad didn’t attempt to argue as he quietly removed himself from the dining room.

Sweat beaded at the back of my neck, but I still refused to look up. There was no way in hell I could look over at my mother right now. Why did it feel like we were all in trouble? The tone, the posture, the feeling in the air. Mother was imposing her power on us and it was working.

Then she laughed. Genuinely laughed. I looked up in surprise, and I could see matching looks on Olivia’s and Leigh’s faces. She smiled at us, her eyes twinkling with mischief. “You girls should see the looks on your face! This isn’t an interrogation. I was just asking some simple questions. Really, you’re all acting a tad bit ridiculous if you ask me.”

Leigh laughed too, but it sounded weak and forced. “Of course, we know that! You were just testing us.” Olivia and I said nothing, clearly both at a lost for words.

Mum shook her head. “Thanksgiving is a time for families to be grateful for what they have. You three should all be thankful that you were born into such a strong family. You will all prosper, live successful lives and continue on the tradition of the family. Stop looking like deer in headlights now.”

If I hadn’t already been nauseous before, I would have been now. Mum had been toying with us? I could feel my hands trembling underneath the table but I refused to let her know that. Something must have been showing on my face because her eyes narrowed ever so slightly in my direction.

“What is bothering you now, Lyndsey?” Her tone was mildly exasperated.

I worked my jaw back and forth for a few seconds, fingers curled tightly against the edge of my seat. I swallowed heavily, forcing myself to look up at her. “That’s wrong.”

“What was that?” The way she asked almost sounded bored. My temper flared and I slammed both my hands on the table, causing my sisters to jump in their seats. Mum just watched impassively.

“That’s fucking sick!” I stood up, towering over her. “Why do you think this is funny? Can’t you see how tense we all were? Stop acting like a bitch for five fucking minutes in your pathetic life and be a decent human being you fucking psycho!”

Mum regarded me silently for a minute before her gaze grew cold. “Are you finished?”

My heart was ramming against my ribcage, my whole body shaking. “Finished with what?” I asked with dread, my voice tight with anger.

“Acting like child,” mum stood up as well. She was no where near my height, but she gave off this imposing aura that made me feel small. She always made me feel small. I tried my damndest to maintain my sense of anger, but I slowly yet surely felt my nerve decrease as mum continue to glare at me coolly.

“I’m not acting like a child,” I said, my voice catching in my throat from emotion.

“Yes, you are,” stated mum frankly, placing her hands on her hips. “You’re raising your voice at me for no reason and slamming things around. If you have something to say to me, say with the level of maturity I expect from someone your age.”

I opened my mouth to say something snarky, but ended up closing it tightly, dropping my head in shame. My entire face was burning with intense feeling. I just wanted to go back to my room, lock the door, and hide under the covers for the rest of the evening. I was just about to apologize for yelling when Olivia spoke up.

“L-Lyn is right,” she said shakily. When mum raised an eyebrow in her direction, she quickly explained, “I don’t mean about the whole psycho bitch thing, but it wasn’t very nice of you to taunt us like that. We are trying to enjoy supper, aren’t we? Whatever happened between Leigh and Lyn is not our business.”

Mum regarded Olivia for a silent moment before clicking her tongue. “Perhaps. However, Lyndsey’s behaviour tonight wasn’t acceptable. Whatever outburst she had today and yesterday is just an indication that she needs to control her emotions better.” She turned her steely gaze towards me. “Isn’t that right, Lyndsey?”

Our eyes locked together, and I nodded weakly. Mum gave me a satisfied smile before looking towards Olivia. “See? We came to an agreement.” Olivia looked as if she wanted to say something more but wisely chose to keep her mouth shut. Mum looked to me again. “Apologize to you sisters for that atrocious outburst.”

“Sorry,” I said stiffly, barely able to keep my tone even.

“You don’t need to apologize,” said Olivia quietly. I just shook my head, wishing this whole thing would just end now.

Leigh fidgeted with the hem of the tablecloth. “Yesterday…we were both at fault, Lyndsey. Let bygones be bygones, yes?” Her tone suggested civil agreement, but her body language was screaming a different story.

I nodded again. Mum waved her hands, dismissing us entirely. I bolted from the room, taking the steps two at a time. I closed my door, locking it behind me. I tore these clothes off, pulling on my pajamas. I sat on the edge of my bed, breathing heavily. My eyes were throbbing, head pounding. My stomach was churning, I felt sick. My body was weak, my mind was racing. I needed to get out of here as fast as possible. I needed to get away from this toxic environment. What was I going to do when summer came around again? Fuck, winter break too. I pressed my hands into eyes, biting down on my tongue to stop myself from shouting out loud.

It didn’t escape my notice that Olivia for the first time spoke up, in defense of me. Too bad it didn’t do much. After a few minutes of forcing myself to get into a state of calm, I reached for my phone that was plugged into the wall. I needed to talk to Loryn. But just before I hit the call button, a wave of guilt washes over me. I shouldn’t bother her during Thanksgiving. She was probably eating supper with her family, enjoying the time with her sisters and parents. Slowly, I drop it from my hand and fell back into the bed.

There was no one I could talk to right now. I would feel terrible if I called and ruined their holiday. Instead, I decided that I would be miserable alone. It was better this way. I wouldn’t want to ruin the Hart name, now would I?

#unnatural affairs #ua #ally holland #lyn hart #paranormal #ghosts #anxiety #murder mysteries #wlw romance #sapphic lead #original story #original fiction #original content #olivia hart #leigh hart #psychological abuse #chapter 14 #writing

0 notes

themoneybuff-blog · 6 years ago

Text

Food waste and food consumption in the United States

I've been thinking a lot lately about how much food I consume (and waste). I'm not happy with how I shop and eat, and it's not just because I'm fat right now. I don't like what I'm eating and I don't like how much food I'm throwing out. Food waste is a huge problem in the United States. Most studies find that Americans waste about one-third of all food that enters the supply chain. This is insane. And when you consider that food spending is the third-largest component of the average American budget, this is a great place for most folks to boost their budget. According to the 2017 Consumer Expenditure Report, the average household spends $7,729 per year ($644.08 per month) on food. If, as the USDA reports, 31% of the average family's food goes to waste, that's the equivalent of burning $2395.99 per year ($199.67 per month). For most families, $200 per month is a big deal. That can be the difference between deficit spending and earning a profit. That $200 per month could be enough to purchase a new car or to afford better health insurance. Today, I want to think out loud about food consumption and food waste in my own life.

This article is unusual in that I'm not going to try to offer any solutions. Instead, I'm simply going to share some observations, and I'm going to divide these observations into bite-sized chunks. If you have solutions to food waste, however, I'd love to hear them. Fun with Friends Kim and I spent this past weekend in central Oregon with some of my best friends from high school. Every year, this group of twelve rents a big house for three or four nights so that we can sit around, reminisce, and enjoy a few days without kids. As is typical with gatherings like this, each couple is in charge of one meal. For instance, Kim and I were responsible for Saturday morning's breakfast. As is also typical for gatherings like this, there's always a ton of food left over. It's tough to estimate how much a group is going to eat. So, even though we did our best to not have leftovers, there were plenty of eggs and ham and biscuits remaining after Kim and I cooked our meal. Every other couple struggled with the same thing. We always do. Yesterday as we were packing to come home, our group marveled at how much food was still in the fridge. Honestly, we could have hosted another long weekend for twelve without having to buy groceries. (Okay, we needed more coffee. We ran out of coffee yesterday morning. Mennonites drink a lot of coffee.) I was pleased to see that our group made a deliberate effort to not waste any of our leftovers. Kristin sent Kim home with the leftover rhubarb sauce. (Kim loves rhubarb!) We sent Kristin home with the leftover ham and the hambone. Kara grabbed the unopened beer. And so on. I've spent time with some groups that would have simply thrown this food out. We didn't do that. Food Storage in the Motorhome During our fifteen months exploring the U.S. by RV, Kim and I had limited space for food storage. We had one (very) small refrigerator and one (very) small set of cabinets for dry goods. We learned quickly that we had to be intentional about the food we bought to keep on hand. The fridge always contained milk and beer, plus whatever meat and salad fixings we needed for the next few days. The cupboard contained rice, pasta, and a few pre-packaged meals. We learned to keep a mental (and written) inventory of what stock items were depleted. If I ate a can of bean with bacon soup, I knew I had to replace it. When we got down to two days worth of rice, we made a point to buy more. At first, this limited storage space was frustrating. It didn't take long, however, to learn that rather than being a problem, this limited storage was freeing. We had less food to worry about. We had fewer choices to make. We always knew what food we had on hand and when we intended to use it. When we returned home to Portland, the fridge in the condo seemed ginormous. Who needed that much cold storage? Not us! For a few weeks, we did a terrific job of maintaining the habits we'd learned on the road. Each afternoon, I'd walk to the store to buy whatever we needed for that evening's meal. We didn't stock up on staples. We simply bought what we needed for the immediate future. Slowly, though, we reverted to our old habits. The fridge became filled with meat and greens and leftovers. After our first trip to Costco no need to ever go to Costco when you're on the road in an RV our cupboards were stocked with beans and rice and cereal and coffee and pre-packaged meals. Two years ago, we moved from that condo (a place with ample storage space) to this much-smaller country cottage. Here, our kitchen storage is limited. In fact, it's so limited that we couldn't store all of the food we had at the condo. We had to give some away and put the rest in the trash. Now, we walk a fine line. We try not to have a lot of staples on hand, but at the same time we like to save money by buying our favorite items in bulk. Most days, I eat a can of Nalley's chili for lunch, for instance. At Safeway, this typically goes for $2.39 per can. If I buy a case of twelve at Costco, I can get it for less than $1.00 per can. (Don't quote me on that price. My memory may be off. It's low, though.)

All the same, we waste too much food. Every week, we find something that's gone bad. Maybe it's a package of salami that got buried under something else. Maybe it's some vegetables that never got used for their intended recipe. Maybe it's a jar of salsa that's managed to mold. Kim and I hate wasting food. Yet we do it. And it's largely because we have too much on hand at any given time. We forget what we have. Or we have so much that we can't possibly eat it all. It's a problem. But I know it's not a problem that's unique to us. A Tiny Fridge Twenty years ago, I knew a young couple that lived in an apartment with a small dorm-sized refrigerator. I thought it was funny at the time. You don't have space to store anything! I said when I first saw it. We like it, the told me. It forces us to make decisions about what we're going to buy. We can't just stock up on everything. We have to be deliberate. I didn't get it. Similarly, my friend Sparky never kept much food on hand. I thought it was weird. When I'd visit him, his fridge would contain maybe a carton of eggs, a head of lettuce, and a carton of milk. His cupboards would be bare except for a loaf of bread and a box of cereal. Where's your food? I asked him once. Sparky shrugged. I only buy what I need, he said. I hate that I have to buy a dozen eggs. I'd rather buy only two. I wish I could buy just two slices of bread at a time. I don't want a fully-stocked pantry. For one, it feels oppressive. It's too much Stuff. Plus, I think it leads to food waste. A Colossal Waste Eight years ago, my mother's mental health problems reached a crisis point. She was in a state of constant disorientation and confusion. (Actually, she's still in this state.) After she drove her car through the back of her garage, my brothers and I moved her into an assisted-living facility. As we cleaned her house during the next few weeks, we were shocked by how much food she had. This single 63-year-old woman had enough on hand to feed a family of five for weeks. Or months. But the sad part was that so much of the food was expired or spoiled. The biggest surprise was a collection of spices from the 1970s. She had eight-year-old mayonnaise in the fridge. She had multiple opened jars of salsa. The pantry which my grandfather had built to store my grandmother's copious canning was stocked with cans and cans of Costco tuna fish. We salvaged as much of the food as we could, taking it home for ourselves. Most of it had to be thrown out. Eating Like Europeans This Saturday, I'm flying to Europe to travel again with my cousin Duane. Thankfully, he's still with us and he's feeling healthy enough to explore France for a couple of weeks. Duane and I both love how Europeans buy food. (Or, how we believe they buy food. Our perception may not match reality, and we know that.) There are supermarkets in Europe, but they're not the megastores we see here in the U.S. And when people shop, they don't buy for weeks at a time. They buy for days at a time. Or one day. They buy what they need for the immediate future. Here in the U.S., we tend to have personal larders designed to satisfy any possible want at any possible moment. Plus, Europe has many more small, single-purpose shops. Duane and I had a ton of fun in December talking with this gal in Strasbourg who ran a cheese shop. She loved cheese, and she loved sharing it with us:

Want some meat? Stop by the butcher to pick some up. Want a few tomatoes? Stop by the produce stand. Need bread? Head across the street to the bakery. And so on. Stores like this do exist in many parts of the U.S., but they're almost always gourmet specialty shops targeting a high-end clientele. Plus, they're few and far between. You have to drive from the butcher to the bakery to the produce stand. From what I've seen of Europe, you can find these shops almost anywhere big cities and small. And they're meant for everyone, not just the wealthy. Again, my perception might be tainted. I might be viewing things through rose-tinted tourist glasses. But I'm willing to wager that European food waste is much less than that of the United States. Too Much Dessert Crap, Kim said as she rushed out the door this morning. It's her first day back to work after five weeks off for knee surgery. We still have those beignets. They're going to go to waste. Last Saturday night, our group of friends went out to eat at a fancy restaurant. Kim and I ordered beignets for dessert. We thought that for $8, we'd get a modest-sized portion that she and I could split. Instead, we got five large pastries. We couldn't finish them. We took them back to the rental house with the intention of eating them later. But we haven't eaten them. And now, as Kim said, they're probably going to end up in the trash. Looking Forward What does all of this mean for me? If I think I buy and waste too much food, how can I change? Is there a way I can change my food consumption to improve both my waistline and my wallet? Relating these anecdotes has helped me to understand that yes, I can (and should) change how I'm buying and storing food. Doing so would help me eat better. Plus, it'd help us feel less cramped in our kitchen. Last autumn, I wrote about re-writing my financial blueprint so that I'm buying things based on actual needs rather than potential wants. At the time, I was thinking about books and garden tools. But the same principle applies to food. The fundamental problem in our lives is that we buy food based on potential wants. not immediate needs. We might want to have pasta next week, so we buy noodles and tomato sauce and meat. We might want to have a big salad this weekend, so we stock up on vegetables and greens. We often prep a charcuterie board for dinner we did so last night! so we try to keep a variety of cheese and salami on hand. But what happens when we go weeks without doing this? Well, the meat and cheese goes to waste. Lack of waste was one of the huge advantages to my recent HelloFresh experiment. When you open a recipe bag, you know you're going to get only what you need to make this meal and no more. You won't end up with a bag of carrots that turns rubbery because they got buried in the produce crisper. They give you the one carrot you need to make your salad.

I'm not ready to go back to HelloFresh, but I think there are other changes I can make to improve my consumption and waste habits. I'd be well-served by returning to how I was prepping meals after we returned from our RV trip. Instead of keeping a ton of stuff on hand, I ought to be making daily decisions about what to eat. Except for my canned chili which I probably eat three to five times per week I shouldn't be stocking up on anything at Costco. This change won't be as easy here in the Stafford hills as it would be in urban Portland. At the condo, I could walk to buy groceries. It was quick. It was simple. Here, the nearest stores is more than a mile away. And we live in a very hilly area. It takes 20+ miles to walk there. Still, even this is an opportunity. I'm fat right now. If I were to walk to Safeway at three every afternoon, I could be home by four with whatever groceries I needed for dinner. I'd burn about 250 calories in the process and I'd get time to decompress. Now that the sunny weather is here (and will remain until October), I don't really have any excuse. Maybe I can't live in my idealized European fashion, but I could certainly try to integrate some aspects of that lifestyle into my own. All it'd take is a little bit of willpower.

Author: J.D. Roth In 2006, J.D. founded Get Rich Slowly to document his quest to get out of debt. Over time, he learned how to save and how to invest. Today, he's managed to reach early retirement! He wants to help you master your money and your life. No scams. No gimmicks. Just smart money advice to help you reach your goals. https://www.getrichslowly.org/food-waste/

0 notes

rilesandlucas · 8 years ago

Text

A work in progress| first-ICU

a/n

welcome to my first tumblr exclusive Multi fic.

Description|

Riley and Lucas meet in unlikely and horrible circumstances. Will they be able to help each other through their bad times?

L U C A S.

I look up at the sign above the door and shiver as I read the three words in my head. Intensive care unit, those three words laced together, trigger horrible memories in my brain that for years I had pushed back. I don't see how it is physically possible to like this place and want to be here, props to the doctors and nurses for working in such a dreary and sad place. I took a big gulp and pressed on the door, sometimes you gotta do hard things so you can have, somewhat, good things come out of it. My somewhat good thing is seeing my lovely father, who has landed himself in here once again but this time demanded I visit. I have been told by my mum that he is in here because he fell at work or something but I don't know why you would need your stomach pumped for that. It's hard to be mad at her though, she is so fragile and frail and I know she is doing it in my best interest.

I saunter past the waiting room my eyes shifting away from all the sleeping, crying and blank people. Memories of what I've seen in that exact waiting room flash through my brain and I pinch my hand to make them go away, focus on the pain not the memories. I continue my walk, averting my gaze to anywhere but the rooms but as I'm doing so something catches my eyes. Straight ahead lies a door, you would run straight into it unless you turned the corner, the light beams brightly through the hinges and I feel almost drawn to it. Curiosity fills my body and I step to look in the Windows. I see a petite blonde sleeping gracefully on a chair next to the bed, on the opposite chair I see a smaller woman with ombré hair, I can only assume she's the mum from her older physic.

I glance over towards the bed and have to take a step back after what I see, lying still is a tall brown haired young girl, probably my age, her face is covered in purple and blues and one of her eyes swelled. There is a bandage wrapped around her head and red splotches scattered around it. Her leg is in a purple cast and being elevated. I feel the guilt and sorrow rise in my stomach and I step back again realising Its rude to stare. I look at the door and see the number 138 and then under it the words, Riley Matthews. Poor Riley Matthews.

I spin on my heels and walk three doors down the hallway to my fathers room, because he has been here so many times we just book him a group room he shared it with about 4 other people, he says he likes the company but I think he just likes the distraction. I open the door and there on my left is my mum fast asleep next to my father on the small white cot-bed. The curtain is around three quarters of the area so you could only see them if you were walking through the door. I looked at my mother and smiled that she finally got some sleep, she never sleeps because of her nerves. Deciding to leave them be I walk back out the door and to the food court.

There was a MacDonalds and Burger King but deciding to go the healthy route I went to subway. I looked up at the clock on the wall and saw that the time was 7:45pm. My father would only be woken up for his meds at 11 and he wouldn't be awake until then so I sat down. After consuming all of my Ham and salad sub I just sat there scrolling through Facebook, that was until the squealing of the chair being scraped along the ground made my head snap up. I looked at the small girl who was taking a seat in front of me, she couldn't be much older than me and her blue eyes shined bright, she was pretty but not my type. I gave her a small smile before going back to my phone.

'Hey I haven't seen you around here before and no new patients are in. Who are you.' The blonde questioned examining me, well she doesn't hold back on anything. I placed my phone on the table and ran my fingers through my hair, why must I have to socialise.

'I'm Lucas, and this is the icu don't new people come in every minute.' I reply bluntly watching her face scrunch up and then return to normal. She stares at me puzzled and I can't even comprehend why she's puzzled, It was a basic question.

'Well this is a rural hospital not a city one so no, most patients go to emergency and then to the main ward or Home. We don't have many intense injuries because this is the country and there isn't a lot of people. Plus every new patient that comes in I usually work out who there family is, let's just say I'm here a lot.' She replied, well I guess that makes sense. That's when I recognised her, she was the girl sitting in the chair in that Riley's room.

'Well fine, I'm Brett's son. I don't like visiting him because hospitals are sad, Who are you.' I queer, I watch as her smile raises and her face glows, this girl is too happy for this place.

'Oh Lucas I know your mum she's really nice. I'm Maya my best friend is in her after she was in a bus crash, she's only been in here for about a week but she's getting better.' She uttered pool of water coating her eyes. I placed my hand on top of hers to try comfort her.

'I'm really sorry that must be really hard. I couldn't imagine anything bad happening to my best friend I mean he's my only support.' Good old zay, even though he's just annoying 85% of the time he's the only person who actually helps me out.

'Yeah it's been really hard and I feel so guilty. She asked me to come into town with her but I was with my boyfriend at the time so I said no. Anyway she was the only one on the bus and if I was on there I would've made her sit at the back and she would've been fine. But because she was alone she sat at the front and got hit with a massive amount of impact. I do have my boyfriend for support though he's like you, He hates hospitals.' Maya lightly laughed and sipped her drink. I don't think I could ever deal with that much guilt on my shoulders, I have never been one to handle guilt very well. Whenever I would do something bad at home I would confess immediately, I mean even if it was the smallest thing like not putting the toilet seat down, I would have too much guilt and couldn't bare having that on my back. That kind of led to me being a goody two shoes at school.

'I'm really sorry that must be super hard. You said you're in here a lot, don't you have school.' I questioned my eyes shifting focus back to the table, I hate socialising.

'It's break right as of yesterday, as you probably know, but before that I just requested time off. Riley, Riley's cousin and two other nerds are pretty much my only friends. My boyfriend is a year older so he's graduated, anyway I don't miss my friends cause the two nerds just study and Tylah is in Australia she gets back tomorrow.' Maya answered flicking through her phone and then holding up a photo of her and all her friends. I laughed at them all pulling goofy faces and my gaze fell onto the tall brown haired girl. She was so beautiful and I can't help but feel so much sorrow knowing she's stuck in here, Maya caught onto me looking at her and flicked to a different photo, Riley was doing twirls in a white dress. I've never seen anything more beautiful.

'That's Riley, she will do anything for her friends and she has a heart of gold. She's so goofy and extremely beautiful. Luckily the doctors presume an almost full recovery just a little bit of brain damage, her memory won't be all that great but she's awake and she remembers everything in her life, it's just things like keys and if she ordered coffee or not. She gets really frustrated but she'll never show it, you'll have to meet her one day she loves new people.' Maya ranted a smile never leaving her face talking about her best friend, they seem like the best best friends ever. I knew I would have to meet this Riley.

Maybe the hospital isn't that bad

MRSQUIRRELSMRSQUIRRELSMRSQUIRELLSMRSQUIRRELSMRSQUIRRELSMRSQUIRRLES

THE NEXT DAY

I strolled back into the icu not as hesitant as yesterday. I had talked to Maya till 11 before going to talk to my dad, we chatted for a bit but his medication makes him sleepy and he fell asleep within the half hour. He requested I come back today though, he has found out I made friends with Maya and bribed me by saying I could hang out with them. I figured it would be better than my usual sitting at home and watching television. There was a difference with this hospital visit though.

'Ooo LUKEY look they have a Starbucks, who knew.' Zay squealed, did I mention that zay got lonely and insisted on coming. I mean I had to tell him no 24 times before I finally caved, Zay's parents work all the time so he basically lived with his cousin Beatrice, who he hates. She was 28 and had a weird boyfriend who said jolly good, every second sentence. They also had a kid called Jed and he was 3 months and always woke Zay up, also Beatrice would never let Zay touch Jed because one time Zay broke their lamp and how can you take care of a child if you can't take care of a lamp. That's why I let him follow me because well, we make each other less lonely.

We got to the end of the hallway and I hesitantly knocked, I had told Maya I would come visit the next time I was back, and that would be the first thing I should do, but I couldn't help feel intrusive. I mean I don't even know this girl and I'm showing up at her room. My thoughts Were stopped when a short petite girl opened the door, she had ombré hair that was slightly wavy and she wore denim blue jeans and a Starbucks top. Her face was kind of long and her eyes were blue, she looked like a younger version of the older women I met last night.

'Hello, who are you.' She questioned, an Australian accent shining through, it wasn't nearly as cliche like on tv but it was evident where she was from.

'Uhh I'm Lucas, Maya said I had to come visit. This is my bro Zay' her face lit up and she lightly hugged us before fully opening the door. There was three people sitting on the window and no bed, Riley must have gone somewhere.

'Hi I'm phosphenes, everyone calls me fossy or Tylah. I'm Topanga's niece and Riley's cousin. That girl with black hair is smackle and the boy is Farkle and you've met Maya, Riley's out at the moment in surgery but you can chill here until she gets back. If you can't tell everyone has weird names in here so I shall call you, uhhhh. Squid for Zay and dungie for Lucas.' She pronounced folding her hands and sitting down on the seat in front of the window, what's that thing called. I took the opportunity to look around the room, it was small but quaint, colourful posters and drawings filled the room and there was a television on the roof. Her bedside tables was filled with candles and cards and the buckets pot plants come in was filled with lots of different flowers. If you took a photo of this place you would barely be able to tell it was a hospital, all the bland things were replaced with colour.

'Ok let's play a game. We go around the room and say three things about ourselves, just to get to know each other better' Maya Announced striding towards the middle of the room, I stifled a Laugh at her abrupt behaviour, she mentioned last night that Riley was crazier and happier than her, well Riley must be crazy.

'I'll begin. I'm Reliable with the ladies, I like cookies and I'm from Texas originally.' Zay said sitting back and making finger guns while going pew pew. How is he reliable with the ladies when the only girl he's ever been interested in has turned him down 28 times.

'Ok my turn. I'm from Melbourne Aus, I like coffee and taking pictures' tylah added with a light smile before sipping her frappé, ok so she does seem to be obsessed with coffee, at least she isn't a liar.

'OK, my middle name is Penelope, I love art and being a savage.' Maya declared lightly laughing, I feel like she's the type of person that's nice but will kill you if you cross her, mental note never to cross her.

'FARKLE MINKUS I like school, plotting to take over the world and I'm very bad at sports'

'ISADORA SMACKLE I like reading, school and I'm head of Debate club.' Smackle finished smiling at Farkle. They were so synchronised you'd think they were robots maybe they are.

And then it was my turn, *inward sigh*, I hate talking about myself cause like what three things describe me best, what if they judge, what if they use this against me. I'm too pessimistic for my own good I swear, well I don't swear cause I'm good boy, OK they're all looking at me.

'Uhh-I'm from Texas, I like baseball a lot, I guess and I've never been in lov-' and that's when the door burst in and I came face to face with the person I'd been anticipating to see for a while, even bruised she's perfect.

I don't think that last statements true anymore.

a/n

Phosphenes is Nebula’s daughter.

#Rucas #a work in progress rucas #rucas fanfic #rucas story #rucas fanfiction #gmw #girl meets world #fanfiction #lucas friar #riley matthews #riley and lucas #riley x lucas

9 notes · View notes

floofsta-x · 8 years ago

Text

(the first set of original questions I’ve answered in forever tbh)

I was tagged by @ameehhhhh, yas it’s good to have you back :). Your tags are always great ahh <333

Rules: Complete the survey and say who tagged you in the beginning. When you are finished tag 5 people to do this survey. Have fun and enjoy!!!

1: Are you named after someone? No, my parents found Bryony in a baby name book. It’s in the dictionary, too, it’s a flowering vine.

2: When is the last time you cried? Yesterday. I was in a mental crisis but my choir teacher helped me through, I appreciate him so much c’:

3: Do you like your handwriting? Sometimes, depends on how careful I’m being, how stable my mental state is, and what kind of writing I’m using. (I have several different variants, on numbers and letters (especially e) lmao.)

4: What is your favorite lunch meat? Honey Ham, mmm

5: Do you have kids? No, I want them someday but not now (o/////o)

6: If you were another person, would you be friends with you? (I think I’ve seen this q in an ask game or something lmao) Yes I would! Though I’m reclusive, I’m pretty friendly and kind :)

7: Do you use sarcasm? sometimes, more frequently for sure since I started college haha

8: Do you still have your tonsils? Yep, never a reason to take them out.

9: Would you bungee jump? Uhhhh I don’t really know.... I don’t think so butttt

10: What is your favorite kind of cereal? Honey Bunches of Oats, Blueberry Muffin Tops, or Cocoa Pebbles

11: Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Nope, I don’t. I tend to slide them on and off.

12: Do you think you’re a strong person? What do you mean by strong? Physically, kind of; mentally, no, and emotionally, certainly not!

13: What is your favorite ice cream flavor? Mint chocolate chip~ or pumpkin pie x chocolate oh God

14: What is the first thing you notice about people? I really don’t know... their voice I guess

15: Red or pink? Red. No fancy reason.

16: What is the least favorite physical thing you like about yourself? the fact that my tummy sticks out beyond my boobs. It would be ok if I was fat and had bigger boobs but nooo

17: What color pants and shoes are you wearing now? Pastel print (owl print) pajama pants and no shoes but white socks

18: What was the last thing you ate? A piece of ice, I know it’s bad for my teeth but I’ve always munched ice

19: What are you listening to right now? I had this weird urge to listen to my Spotify EDM playlist tonight so

What You’re Waiting For: Tiësto & Ummet Ozcan

Don’t Run From My Love: 1WayTKT, Cossy & Mark Borino (great and underrated track pls stan)

Ping Pong - Gary Caos Remix: Ryan Riback, Lowkiss, MC Flipside, feat. Stef Cima

Superwave: Ummet Ozcan (Ummet Ozcan is the best ok just go listen to Spacecats pls)

Fade Away: Reez, Mandy Jiroux (another great underrated Armada release)

Split (Only U): Tiësto & The Chainsmokers

Badgal: Rob & Jack, Sanjin (SANJIN IS THE BEST OK I JUST LOVE EVERYTHING HE FEATURES IN)

Big Bird: Blasterjaxx (love love love love love Blasterjaxx)

On the Floor Like: Bassjackers, Joe Ghost, MOTi

Strong: R3HAB, KSHMR (these two together are amazing :oooo)

20: If you were a crayon, what color would you be? I don’t know... I’ve always been curious as to what my aura is though, I think I’d be that color.

21: Favorite smell? Saxophone. Yes saxophones have a smell and it is glorious.

22: Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? I kind of spoke over speaker phone to a representative from the education office the other day, my teacher was asking her a couple of questions and I clarified what he was asking her.

23: Favorite sport to watch? ooh.... probably either baseball or Formula One

24: Hair color? Honey Brown

25: Eye color? Dark Brown

26: Do you wear contacts? No, I can’t stand the thought and never have been able to; I wear glasses constantly instead.

27: Favorite food to eat? Lasagna is my favorite food, but I love eating shrimp (even the tails yum) and Kalamari too.

28: Scary movies or comedy? Don’t have much experience with both tbh so either is fine. I don’t care whether I laugh or cling to my roommate for dear life

29: Last movie you watched? Um probably The Island with my dad, we had a movie night right before I went back to school and watched Demolition Man too

30: What color of shirt are you wearing? Orange with the Samaritan’s Purse (charity and aid organization) logo

31: Summer or winter? I’d much rather be cold than hot so winter.

32: Hugs or kisses? Both are fine, but kisses tbh~ I miss kisses so much still and it’s been like 3 years since I had a boyfriend ugh

33: What book are you currently reading? None, I haven’t read a book in a while tbh. I don’t have time

34: Who do you miss right now? My dad. Since I got thinking about our movie night /sigh. Also my friend Curtis who is student teaching this semester.

35: What is on your mouse pad? I’m on a laptop so I’m using a track pad hahah. But down in the room where I work I have a manila envelope as my mouse pad and I think it’s got the name of a piece on it, ‘Suzanni’ I think?

36: What is the last TV program you watched? Probably the Flash, with my family before I left for college. This does not include listening to my roommate watch Riverdale and Veronica Mars

37: What is the best sound? Any Monsta X track tbh Stan Getz and his tenor saxophone

38: Rolling Stones or The Beatles? More of a Beatles fan tbh--Don’t Let Me Down is a good song.

39: What is the furthest you have ever traveled? to Florida, I was really little though. I’m from Colorado/Nebraska so lol

40: Do you have a special talent? Stanning all these groups at once Not really, I mean I play clarinet and saxophone but that’s pretty common huh? Umm, I draw cute things well??

41: Where were you born? Small Town in Northeastern Colorado

These were pretty good, umm I might have done them on facebook before or something? Some seem familiar.... I tag @fyhjjxxn, @i-u-shi, @missmugiwara, @sugasboyfriend, and @kirspel. lol tagging five people was stressful lolol. If you don’t have to or have already done it, you don’t have to obvs, as always.

#tagged #ameehhhhh #original questions for once wowow #lots of them though lol #also I just went through my followers list and holy heck there were some I didn't see that I had gained!#I always go back through and look at who's followed me recently... and follow back as I see the notifications.#anyways #ok I'm going to bed #nighty <333

4 notes · View notes

andrewdburton · 6 years ago

Text

Food waste and food consumption in the United States

Food waste is a huge problem in the United States. Most studies find that Americans waste about one-third of all food that enters the supply chain. This is insane. And when you consider that food spending is the third-largest component of the average American budget, this is a great place for most folks to boost their budget.

According to the 2017 Consumer Expenditure Report, the average household spends $7,729 per year ($644.08 per month) on food. If, as the USDA reports, 31% of the average family's food goes to waste, that's the equivalent of burning $2395.99 per year ($199.67 per month).

For most families, $200 per month is a big deal. That can be the difference between deficit spending and earning a “profit”. That $200 per month could be enough to purchase a new car or to afford better health insurance.

Today, I want to think out loud about food consumption and food waste in my own life.

This article is unusual in that I'm not going to try to offer any solutions. Instead, I'm simply going to share some observations, and I'm going to divide these observations into bite-sized chunks.

If you have solutions to food waste, however, I'd love to hear them.

Fun with Friends

Kim and I spent this past weekend in central Oregon with some of my best friends from high school. Every year, this group of twelve rents a big house for three or four nights so that we can sit around, reminisce, and enjoy a few days without kids.

As is typical with gatherings like this, each couple is in charge of one meal. For instance, Kim and I were responsible for Saturday morning's breakfast.

As is also typical for gatherings like this, there's always a ton of food left over. It's tough to estimate how much a group is going to eat. So, even though we did our best to not have leftovers, there were plenty of eggs and ham and biscuits remaining after Kim and I cooked our meal. Every other couple struggled with the same thing. We always do.

Yesterday as we were packing to come home, our group marveled at how much food was still in the fridge. Honestly, we could have hosted another long weekend for twelve without having to buy groceries. (Okay, we needed more coffee. We ran out of coffee yesterday morning. Mennonites drink a lot of coffee.)

I was pleased to see that our group made a deliberate effort to not waste any of our leftovers. Kristin sent Kim home with the leftover rhubarb sauce. (Kim loves rhubarb!) We sent Kristin home with the leftover ham and the hambone. Kara grabbed the unopened beer. And so on. I've spent time with some groups that would have simply thrown this food out. We didn't do that.

Food Storage in the Motorhome

During our fifteen months exploring the U.S. by RV, Kim and I had limited space for food storage. We had one (very) small refrigerator and one (very) small set of cabinets for dry goods. We learned quickly that we had to be intentional about the food we bought to keep on hand.

The fridge always contained milk and beer, plus whatever meat and salad fixings we needed for the next few days. The cupboard contained rice, pasta, and a few pre-packaged meals.

We learned to keep a mental (and written) inventory of what “stock” items were depleted. If I ate a can of bean with bacon soup, I knew I had to replace it. When we got down to two days worth of rice, we made a point to buy more.

At first, this limited storage space was frustrating. It didn't take long, however, to learn that rather than being a problem, this limited storage was freeing. We had less food to worry about. We had fewer choices to make. We always knew what food we had on hand and when we intended to use it.

When we returned home to Portland, the fridge in the condo seemed ginormous. Who needed that much cold storage? Not us!

For a few weeks, we did a terrific job of maintaining the habits we'd learned on the road. Each afternoon, I'd walk to the store to buy whatever we needed for that evening's meal. We didn't stock up on staples. We simply bought what we needed for the immediate future.

Slowly, though, we reverted to our old habits. The fridge became filled with meat and greens and leftovers. After our first trip to Costco — no need to ever go to Costco when you're on the road in an RV — our cupboards were stocked with beans and rice and cereal and coffee and pre-packaged meals.

Two years ago, we moved from that condo (a place with ample storage space) to this much-smaller country cottage. Here, our kitchen storage is limited. In fact, it's so limited that we couldn't store all of the food we had at the condo. We had to give some away — and put the rest in the trash.

Now, we walk a fine line. We try not to have a lot of “staples” on hand, but at the same time we like to save money by buying our favorite items in bulk. Most days, I eat a can of Nalley's chili for lunch, for instance. At Safeway, this typically goes for $2.39 per can. If I buy a case of twelve at Costco, I can get it for less than $1.00 per can. (Don't quote me on that price. My memory may be off. It's low, though.)

Kim and I hate wasting food. Yet we do it. And it's largely because we have too much on hand at any given time. We forget what we have. Or we have so much that we can't possibly eat it all. It's a problem. But I know it's not a problem that's unique to us.

A Tiny Fridge

Twenty years ago, I knew a young couple that lived in an apartment with a small dorm-sized refrigerator. I thought it was funny at the time. “You don't have space to store anything!” I said when I first saw it.

“We like it,” the told me. “It forces us to make decisions about what we're going to buy. We can't just stock up on everything. We have to be deliberate.”

I didn't get it.

Similarly, my friend Sparky never kept much food on hand. I thought it was weird. When I'd visit him, his fridge would contain maybe a carton of eggs, a head of lettuce, and a carton of milk. His cupboards would be bare except for a loaf of bread and a box of cereal.

“Where's your food?” I asked him once. Sparky shrugged.

“I only buy what I need,” he said. “I hate that I have to buy a dozen eggs. I'd rather buy only two. I wish I could buy just two slices of bread at a time. I don't want a fully-stocked pantry. For one, it feels oppressive. It's too much Stuff. Plus, I think it leads to food waste.”

A Colossal Waste

Eight years ago, my mother's mental health problems reached a crisis point. She was in a state of constant disorientation and confusion. (Actually, she's still in this state.) After she drove her car through the back of her garage, my brothers and I moved her into an assisted-living facility.

As we cleaned her house during the next few weeks, we were shocked by how much food she had. This single 63-year-old woman had enough on hand to feed a family of five for weeks. Or months. But the sad part was that so much of the food was expired or spoiled. The biggest surprise was a collection of spices from the 1970s.

She had eight-year-old mayonnaise in the fridge. She had multiple opened jars of salsa. The pantry — which my grandfather had built to store my grandmother's copious canning — was stocked with cans and cans of Costco tuna fish.

We salvaged as much of the food as we could, taking it home for ourselves. Most of it had to be thrown out.

Eating Like Europeans

This Saturday, I'm flying to Europe to travel again with my cousin Duane. Thankfully, he's still with us — and he's feeling healthy enough to explore France for a couple of weeks.

Duane and I both love how Europeans buy food. (Or, how we believe they buy food. Our perception may not match reality, and we know that.)

There are supermarkets in Europe, but they're not the megastores we see here in the U.S. And when people shop, they don't buy for weeks at a time. They buy for days at a time. Or one day. They buy what they need for the immediate future. Here in the U.S., we tend to have personal larders designed to satisfy any possible want at any possible moment.

Plus, Europe has many more small, single-purpose shops. Duane and I had a ton of fun in December talking with this gal in Strasbourg who ran a cheese shop. She loved cheese, and she loved sharing it with us:

From what I've seen of Europe, you can find these shops almost anywhere — big cities and small. And they're meant for everyone, not just the wealthy.

Again, my perception might be tainted. I might be viewing things through rose-tinted tourist glasses. But I'm willing to wager that European food waste is much less than that of the United States.

Too Much Dessert

“Crap,” Kim said as she rushed out the door this morning. It's her first day back to work after five weeks off for knee surgery. “We still have those beignets. They're going to go to waste.”

Last Saturday night, our group of friends went out to eat at a fancy restaurant. Kim and I ordered beignets for dessert. We thought that for $8, we'd get a modest-sized portion that she and I could split. Instead, we got five large pastries. We couldn't finish them. We took them back to the rental house with the intention of eating them later. But we haven't eaten them. And now, as Kim said, they're probably going to end up in the trash.

Looking Forward

What does all of this mean for me? If I think I buy and waste too much food, how can I change? Is there a way I can change my food consumption to improve both my waistline and my wallet?

Relating these anecdotes has helped me to understand that yes, I can (and should) change how I'm buying and storing food. Doing so would help me eat better. Plus, it'd help us feel less cramped in our kitchen.

Last autumn, I wrote about re-writing my financial blueprint so that I'm buying things based on actual needs rather than potential wants. At the time, I was thinking about books and garden tools. But the same principle applies to food.

The fundamental problem in our lives is that we buy food based on potential wants. not immediate needs. We might want to have pasta next week, so we buy noodles and tomato sauce and meat. We might want to have a big salad this weekend, so we stock up on vegetables and greens. We often prep a charcuterie board for dinner — we did so last night! — so we try to keep a variety of cheese and salami on hand. But what happens when we go weeks without doing this? Well, the meat and cheese goes to waste.

Lack of waste was one of the huge advantages to my recent HelloFresh experiment. When you open a recipe bag, you know you're going to get only what you need to make this meal — and no more. You won't end up with a bag of carrots that turns rubbery because they got buried in the produce crisper. They give you the one carrot you need to make your salad.

I'm not ready to go back to HelloFresh, but I think there are other changes I can make to improve my consumption and waste habits.

I'd be well-served by returning to how I was prepping meals after we returned from our RV trip. Instead of keeping a ton of stuff on hand, I ought to be making daily decisions about what to eat. Except for my canned chili — which I probably eat three to five times per week — I shouldn't be stocking up on anything at Costco.

This change won't be as easy here in the Stafford hills as it would be in urban Portland. At the condo, I could walk to buy groceries. It was quick. It was simple. Here, the nearest stores is more than a mile away. And we live in a very hilly area. It takes 20+ miles to walk there.

Still, even this is an opportunity.

I'm fat right now. If I were to walk to Safeway at three every afternoon, I could be home by four with whatever groceries I needed for dinner. I'd burn about 250 calories in the process and I'd get time to decompress. Now that the sunny weather is here (and will remain until October), I don't really have any excuse.

Maybe I can't live in my idealized European fashion, but I could certainly try to integrate some aspects of that lifestyle into my own. All it'd take is a little bit of willpower.

The post Food waste and food consumption in the United States appeared first on Get Rich Slowly.

from Finance https://www.getrichslowly.org/food-waste/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

0 notes

apileoflaundry · 6 years ago

Text

found another thing

have you ever had a conversation with a cab driver? Yeah but never one that was all that interesting do you have any shirts from vacation/tourist locations? Used to have a ton of them, but not anymore. I had one when I was a kid, it was from Oklahoma, and it was about tipping cows. That was cool lol. what is one place you would like to go back and revisit? Chicago. Haven’t been there in awhile. which would you prefer: a homemade gift, or a store-bought one? Homemade but obviously I’d accept store-bought ones. have you ever hugged a complete stranger? I’m not sure but probably not

when was the last time you were “under the influence?” Never how regular of an occurrence is this? Never what random acts of kindness have you engaged in lately? Sometimes I pick up trash from the ground. Idk what else do you know anyone who has never read the HP books? who? Probably plenty of people but I don’t care who. I’ve never read all of them myself have you ever had a relationship last for a year or longer? It feels like I have but I can’t remember what ended it, or are you still involved? *shrug* what kind of scented lotion is your favorite? I don’t care where’s the weirdest place you’ve stuck your used gum? When I was a kid I stuck it in someone’s car, she was pissed and made me clean it up what’s the best time you’ve had at a high school sports game? I went to a game with my dad, it was my high school vs. some school whose mascot was the Coyotes. But it wasn’t held at either high school, it was at our rival’s if you’re out late, where are you likely to be? Not likely to be out late do you ever visit your mall’s arcade (if it has one)? It doesn’t have one when was the last time you had hot chocolate? It was at school and it was basically hot water shirts with sarcastic sayings: yay, or boo? Yay. I want some. I have a baseball shirt that says “touchdown” if that counts if “yay,” do you have a favorite? ”Why be racist, sexist, homophobic, or transphobic when you could just be quiet?” (maybe not sarcastic but it feels like it) if you lost the use of your limbs, would you still want to live? Yeah I’ve got too much to live for, hope in a better future and of course being there for my girlfriend as examples what’s your absolute favorite topic to discuss? Anything I fanboy over

what is your least favorite topic to discuss? Uhhh personal things when I’m talking to people I don’t want to share them with when was the last time you played hide-and-go-seek? A couple years ago with my cousins where was your favorite place to hide? I never had one what is your opinion on psychics? real, or fake? Isaac Newton didn’t even exist he was just made up, so was physics have you ever watched “are you smarter than a fifth grader?” Yeah, I actually liked it when I was a kid how would you rank your “class participation” in school? It’s horrible in a group because I hate talking to people, but I still raise my hand in class so it’s not too bad have you ever cut your own hair? how about anyone else’s? A few times for myself, never for anyone else. You know how in books and movies there’s a trope where a kid cuts their own hair and it looks like shit? That never happened to me lmao. what is your favorite holiday treat? My grandmother makes these cookies called chocolate dogs and they’re delicious. I should ask her for the recipe so I can make some on my own. how many people have you emotionally hurt? Don’t have a specifically number but probably too many. I’m not the absolute worst person in the world but I’m kind of fucked up. I’m working on bettering myself and I’ve made some progress, but I certainly feel ashamed of my past. how many people have you physically hurt? I fought with my brother as a kid. But other than that not that many, I’m normally not physically violent. were these times intentional, or were they accidents/mistakes? Well both...I don’t want to go into detail :P what is the last thing you asked your parents to purchase for you? I asked for a haircut yesterday because I have no money. My dad gave me $40 and I have yet to use it. do you have any buttons or pins on your backpack? No but it would be pretty cool to have some.

if yes, what do they say? N/A what is your favorite kind of lunch meat? Ham. It goes well with cheese. And this weird spicy mustard we have in the fridge. do you know anyone who is truly obsessive compulsive? Not that I know of. have you ever been confined to a wheelchair? No. how many “top friends” do you have on myspace? ???

do you like oatmeal? It’s okay. I’ve never had good oatmeal though, just the crappy packaged kind from the store.

how many people are on your bzoink friends list? ?????? How old is this???? do you enjoy mainstream music, or prefer underground bands? Depends on what “mainstream” is. The Beatles are very popular but they’re not the top band of 2019. Anyway I like rock music so not very mainstream in the first place how many bands are you “friends” with on myspace? W h a t are you friends with more bands than individual people? meep

do you have a library card? do you use it? Yeah but rarely. I should use it more do you cuddle with your pet (if you have one)? Yeah I cuddle with my cat! He likes curling in a ball next to me when I’m sleeping :3 do you have any candy left over from halloween? I didn’t go trick or treating last year so no. I have some candy stored in my bedroom though. It’s mostly stuff I don’t care about but it’s still candy have you heard of paula godspeed? No have you ever made a bzoink friend test? I’ve never even heard of bzoink who has the best score on it? Jesus Christ himself do you think that you work better under pressure? It depends on what under pressure means. I work better when a deadline is coming up, and I buckle down and get to work. But I don’t work well when someone’s yelling at me to get stuff done, it just makes me stressed and I don’t work well when stressed.

or, do you ONLY work under pressure? Uh no what college did you want to attend as a kid? ASU was that still your choice when you grew up? I mean I’m 18 but I still feel like a kid, my plan is to go there after community college what sports star or athlete did you aspire to be like as a kid? I don’t play sports what has happened to all your old toys? We threw most of them out. But some of them, like my baby toys, were given to other people. when was the last time you shopped at a garage sale? When I was 10. I had a babysitter that liked garage sales have you ever thrown popcorn at anyone? I don’t think so but it sounds like something I would do haha

What’s your definition of weird? There are different kinds of weird. There’s weird as in, you’re different from other people, and there’s weird as in, you’re fucking creepy. The former is like people who like things that aren’t socially acceptable but don’t harm anyone, and the latter is when they do harm others, like pedophiles. I gladly accept anyone who’s weird as long as they’re not the harmful type. Do you use shaving cream? No because as of the time of writing I don’t need to shave. When I start testosterone I will When was the last time you cleaned your room? Is your room clean? I cleaned up a little the other day but it’s still messy Have you ever personally known any girl who shaved their head? Not personally. Have you ever known anyone who committed suicide? No, but that would devastate the shit out of me.

Have you ever tried to commit suicide? Yep. Have you ever coughed up blood? I’ve coughed up mucus with blood in it, but never pure blood How do you wish you could die? In my sleep. And also when just about everything I’ve ever wanted to do in my life has been fulfilled. What’s the longest phone conversation you’ve had lately? I haven’t had one lately. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? My dad I think What were the last words you said? ”(Brother’s name), be quiet” Who was the last person you hugged? My brother Do you have any apps on your Facebook? If so, what? Don’t have Facebook What’s some of the worst pain you’ve ever felt? Woke up one morning and my abdomen hurt like crazy for unknown reasons, I didn’t even want to get up. What kind of mouse pad do you have? I have one of a tiger that I’m not using. What color is your mouse? Black and gray. Do you or have you ever had an eating disorder? No. Do you think you’re fat? No. Do you know any who might be anorexic? Do you know anyone who has bulimia? Not that I know of. Did you ever want a pony when you were little? Yeah, I was never crazy about it but I had a toy pony named Boots, named after a pony my grandmother had. What’s your favorite cheese? Monterrey Jack I guess What’s your favorite cake? Ice cream cake is the shit What are you having/what did you have for dinner tonight? I didn’t have much of a dinner but I stole some fries from my dad and I had a shake from Sonic. What’s your favorite dessert food? Brownies. With M&Ms. What’s your favorite candy? Snickers. Have you ever had a Nos? Wtf is a Nos?? How long have you been taking this survey? A couple hours on and off What are you listening to right now? Lazy Eye by Silversun Pickups. It reminds me of a friend I used to have. Our friendship died awhile ago, maybe it was mostly my fault for not maintaining it, but I still find it sad even though I haven’t talked to him in years. Still it’s a great song, I just felt like sharing that What is the closest thing to you right now that is alive? My family sleeping What’s your worst fear? Shitting myself. I’m not kidding it scares the hell out of me Are you an outcast? Absolutely. Do you exercise? Hardly ever. I walk occasionally and ride my bike infrequently, but that’s about all I do. I know I should exercise more but I’m not sure where to start Do you hate it when people repeat themselves? Only when it’s annoying Do you say like a lot? Yep What’s your favorite carnival food? (cotton candy, corn dogs, funnel cake) Fried Twinkies Do you have a good memory? In 5th grade we went on a field trip to St Louis. We went to this museum for kids and I had a lot of fun. The most I remember of it was that there was a slide that was dark and it sent you to a room, and it had a camera so you could see if someone’s on the slide. We flipped off the camera. Do you dislike writing school essays? Yes Are you a very open-minded person? I’m mostly open-minded but not as much as I could be. Are you modest? Yeah I think so What kind of guys/girls do you usually fall for? Funny, dorky, kind ones.

Do you skate? Not really Are you in a band? Nope Can you play the guitar? If not, what other instrument do you play? I wanted to pick it up a long time ago but I hate playing instruments. I don’t know how to play anything besides the recorder If you were to make it big with your own band, what would its name be? The initials of everyone in the band (idk) What’s your favorite kind of pasta? Spaghetti but I fucking love pasta Would you rather a friend come over to your house or you go over there? I go over there What’s the perfect first date? Cuddling and watching anime Have you ever had rabies? No Do you know anyone who ever had to get a rabies shot? No Have you ever gone hunting? No Ever eaten deer? Duck? Squirrel? How about lamb? No Are you a vegetarian? Nope, I love meat Do you know any vegetarians? What about vegans? Yes Do you know what a vegan is? How about fruititarian? Oh come on What’s your favorite search engine? Google Internet Explorer or Firefox? Safari or Firefox? Chrome Do you have hair in your nose? Who doesn’t?? How long, in miles, is the width of your fingernail? 100000000000000000000+ miles Are you a math wiz? Noooo What’s your favorite subject? Don’t have one What is your locker number at school? Do you have a lock on your locker? We don’t have lockers. Used to but we got rid of them Have you ever received a note in your locker? No Do you like to laugh? Definitely, but doesn’t everyone?

Damn it’s over? I want to write more even though I'm tired :<

0 notes

wishingfornever · 6 years ago

Text

10/14/17 – No Contact: Total Relapse

Current time is 1am. I went to bed early last night. Can’t remember my dream. Ariel unloaded A BUNCH of fucking information on me. Like… a lot. I’d fill you in but it’s more personal stuff.

I really should go back to sleep. Tomorrow, I’ll cook myself a couple of eggs. Not scrambled. Fried, I think. The one where the yolks runny. I made a big egg sandwich today using an ENTIRE can of corn. The irony is that there was like… more corn than egg and then there was too much egg for a single sandwich, which I ate with spinach and cheese.

It’s… all I’ve eaten today. And an apple. Probably should eat more throughout the day.

Whatever. Tomorrow, I’ll make myself a sandwich with those fried eggs I was talking about. Over easy, I think? Never been good with food terms, I fear. I’ll use my seasonings. As soon as I’m done with that Himalayan pink salt, I’ll get some seasoned salt. I can’t wait. I’ll make it tomorrow morning. Which is technically today. Right now. We’ll need to go grocery shopping in a bit. Probably today or tomorrow, seeing how it’s the weekend. I’d want to get there early to actually get avocados.

HEB sucks at restocking. Like… the avocados they had last week were fucking gross.

I… want to learn what to do to make slushies like you make. Unfortunately, I can’t ask you. I guess I can ask in a month and a half. And then you can block me. El oh el.

Yeah, probably an accurate guess right now. Regardless… I didn’t do my sets yesterday. I’ve been trying to get my sleeping schedule to work again. Been waking up and not going to bed. Unfortunately… I basically took a nap. I’m not that sleepy. Maybe I can go to sleep soon? But even then, I’ll try to wake up at 10. I’ll talk to Adela and see if we can go shopping today. I want to go there at about lunch, maybe. Just while they still have shit.

I should be trying to sleeping. Watching a video though. It’s titled “It’s Too Quiet.” You know… that’s an actual thing. My dad said that you could feel when you were about to be ambushed because it’s literally too quiet. I think the reason is is because animals tend to avoid humans. If it’s quiet, that means the birds aren’t leaving or moving because there has been someone there for a while. Thus, they stay away. People intentionally don’t make noise, so it’s just you in the middle of a jungle with stillness.

We’re always hearing. It’s… maddening when you don’t hear. The if it gets too quiet, you can hear your own blood run through your veins. You use your senses at all times. When one sense stops working then your brain panics. For example, white room torture where everything you see is white because you’re in a white room with no colors and you’re only fed white rice. It’s a torture that lasts LONG after it’s over.

I think sometime this week, I’ll order myself a pizza. I want to get it with ham but it’ll just be pineapple. Oh, I’m sorry. Did I stop talking about torture and blood and ambushes to talk about how hungry I am?

Kidding. I got that gal from yesterday a pizza. Now I want a pizza for myself. I wonder if Pizza Hut finally learned that we’re in their district. If not, there is always PizzaFino. That’s probably Italian for Fine Pizza. Sounds like something that’d happen. Considering it’s a Latin language, I wouldn’t doubt it. English is technically Latin but it’s also German. That sucks because instead of having the best of both languages, we have the worst. Foreign. You don’t pronounce the g. I HATE words with silent letters. Like… seriously? Why do you need a silent letter? It doesn’t change how the word is pronounced. Maybe it used to be pronounced for-ayg-in. Like… Foreagan. Hrm… Possible name origin? If that’s the case, why’d we stop saying the “G”? I don’t know… Language is weird. It evolves with the population and culture. You know, Korean’s written language was supposed to be written by a linguist. Thus, you could hypothetically learn how to read in Korean in a day. What it means? Can’t tell you. Makes me wonder who the hell came up with writing the other languages like Kanji and shit. That was not written by a linguist, it was written by the clone of Hermann Fucking Goering.

It’s a joke. Hermann Goering was German, obviously he didn’t write Kanji. And Kanji was written before Hermann Goering was born, so obviously it’d be older than his clone. See? I’m so funny. At least I would be if I didn’t steal the original quote. Whelp!

Anyways… I didn’t call my dad yesterday. Or Starbucks. I have a terrible work ethic. Maybe today, hopefully after I wake up at a decent time. I wanted to rewrite the chapter but I was so sleepy throughout most of the day that it’s literally bad if I try to write. I need to be awake (sort of like now) or otherwise things will turn to crap.

My dad used to have a teepee. He was part of a group called Mountain Men who basically longed for the days where it was frontier. Not the settlers traveling by wagon but before that with frontiersmen. That flintlock rifle above the kitchen he used in some events. “Bringing home the bacon” comes from one such historical event where they win like a bucket of bacon by shooting a rope.

I remember when I was younger. I remember the crispy marshmallows and campfires. Cast iron pots and pans. His teepee had this long snake wrapping around the outside. A lot of bearded old folks in tanned leathers.

Current time… 4:30. Still sleepy. I’ve spent most of the previous 24 hours in bed. I was hoping to wake up at 10am but I overshot my intended goal by six hours. Still… sleepy. I’m having a hard time resetting my sleep schedule. It was better in California when everything went down. Not because I was being good but because my family let me be. Then my sister and dad kept insisting I join them for their reindeer games which takes FOR GOD DAMN EVER.

I’m not bitter, not trying to insinuate anything. Well, maybe a little bit. Because I tried going to bed at 11pm while I was there. Accounting for jet lag? That’d be… 1am. Thing is Janis kept trying to get me to stay up. Saying she’s never there. Then when I told her I wanted to go to bed she’d be like, “Boohoo, I never sleep ever.”

You know that sort of bullshit.

Regardless, I think I’m relapsing. I miss my upswing surge but that’s passing now. I wish I took more advantage of it. Honestly, I had hoped I wouldn’t need therapy because of it. I guess I’ll still need it… or medication which I’ve completely been ignoring. Maybe I should get on that again. Use the Attend stuff. Hrm…

I had a series of dreams last night. One of them involved me living life through your eyes at Dennis’s. Of course, it could have been Dennis I was living through but I spoke to your mom during the dream so I think it was you. It was a little awkward feeling. I think that feeling, however, is just my predetermination of what you must be feeling thus is my own bias. The dream that followed involved a hospital and my Marxist friend who got pregnant recently. There was also a lady cop there.

It ended with my dad and I driving through old towns and stopping at antique stores. That was the most dramatic of the dreams for some reason. Not because of my dad, but because I ended up sleeping with someone who constantly tried to get you out of my life. Moving on. There was more but I can’t remember…

Huh… I realized something. I’m sleeping on your side of the bed… I’m going to experiment tonight and see if I sleep better by switching sides. I’ll keep this in mind today.

When you called yourself a whore… that haunts me. I can’t get over it. You said it was true. It’s not. You’re so hard on yourself. And you wonder why I was trying to keep you motivated. I worry about you. Because I love you. I love you unconditionally. Even if I completely move on, years from now you could show up at my door and ask for help and I’d help.

It’s my character. I told you this before. You’d REALLY have to fuck up to have me cut you out of my life.

What about Dennis then?

Yeah, well you don’t seem to understand what he did that upset me. And even then, I tried to give him a chance to apologize. With my niece, when she screwed me over, I publicly shamed her. I haven’t done that with Dennis. That’s my nature. I will publicly shame someone who I think is a parasite.

You’re ignorant. You’re naive. You’ve fucked up, but you’re not a monster. I know you… it may not seem like I listen but, I listen more than you know.

I hope reading this journal doesn’t make you feel bad. I feel like it’ll make you angry rather than guilty, tbh (guess I don’t know you that well if I’m so uncertain; lol) but know it’s not my intention.

I got nothing done today. I should probably just… roll with it. Like, I said I was more awake last night after a dumb little nap. Maybe I should just write at night and sleep throughout the day. I could always get sleeping pills, too. Something that’s not organic to force me to sleep.

I haven’t done my sets in a while. Haven’t had a shower for a while too.

Ugh… this is a familiar feeling. Negative thoughts tend to overwhelm me. The smallest things need the most extreme solutions… and I mean most extreme. >< Christ, I’m isolating myself again. About two hours ago, Adela asked if I were alright. I just said I was fine. I have yet to leave bed today. She walked Max without me. Currently 9pm.

Just went to the bathroom… I should probably drink more water. Yeah, I think my body might be pretty dehydrated. :/

What if that’s why I’m depressed? I’m only sad because I don’t drink enough water. It’d explain why I get so depressed during the summer. Because I’m always sweating and it’s hot and I’m miserable. But it’s not hot here. I haven’t drank as much water as I was hoping to. I have, however, cooked more. I mean… I am hungry now but I don’t want to go get food.

Eh…. Well, that’s one way to lose weight.

I’ll probably cook myself something in a bit. Refill my water bottle. Then clean my room. Then maybe write. Of course, I told Shane I’d be available today. I guess not. So… feeling like a piece of shit right now. :/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3DrpmXtpFtw

If you open the link, you’ll discover that it’s not a song. Not this time. Rather, it’s confronting a problem in Hollywood. Just finding out about it. Guess I should probably pay more attention to the news. I really have no clue what’s happening right now. However, this video talks about something that’s happened to you.

You claimed you consented by letting it happen. You tend to reference fight or flight a lot. With Mark and Dennis, you consented because you allowed it and because you didn’t fight or run away. Turns out, it’s not just fight or flight. So, yeah. You don’t need to justify that shit. So fucking don’t. Don’t try to justify their actions with your submission. Admittedly, you confronted Mark but you haven’t confronted Dennis. I guess you feel like you cheated on me with Dennis, but the way you put it… he and Mark are no different.

Dennis is a piece of shit.

Maybe when this is all over, you can. Whether we connect or not, it’s irrelevant.

Sorry. Serious topic, I know. I’ll just blame this all on myself again. ><

Anyways… Current time is 11pm. Just made myself breakfast. Two fried eggs in a sandwich. Two slices of Swiss and a ketchup drizzle.

It wasn’t as good as I thought it would be. Not because it’s bad but because I’m bad at cooking. My hands are clumsy. Couldn’t flip the egg very well. I like it when the yolk is running but… it would appear that I’m not very good at working a spatula. I basically broke the yolk twice. First time was because I cracked the egg poorly. So, it came fucked up. Second time? I failed at flipping.

Then I put too much garlic on it. Was good but was kind of salty from it. I know I didn’t put too much salt on it because I had to twist it as I cooked it. I felt pressured and rushed, so quality suffered. Not to imply that it was going to be great before. That said, Swiss cheese is kind of… losing it’s charm. I used to actually enjoy it. When I was younger I didn’t. Now? Since I stopped eating meat? It’s become dull. I don’t know, I guess I’ll start eating it with other cheeses. Like cheddar, which you and Adela don’t seem to like. Not sure why.

She made sure to mention that the Mexican four cheese shredded cheese pack or whatever the hell it’s called isn’t Mexican because of the cheddar. She emphasized how they only use white cheese in Mexico and I told her, “Well, I’m not making quesadillas with it.” I intended mix it with some veggies. Of which, I probably use too much of it.

Eh… Monterrey Jack is a viable option. I might make myself some more eggs later. I’ll have to do the dishes though. Or something. I don’t know, I’ll probably have some peas and carrots later with an apple. I might have an apple now. Then I need to organize my room. Living out of my suitcase is fun. Not sure if that’s sarcasm, yet.

I brought a lot of clothes. Obviously, I’m here for a while. Right now, they’re in a hamper. A clean hamper, mind you. There is a dirty hamper too. We purchased a light net hamper thing while we were in California. You didn’t take it… so it’s mine now! HA HA!!! >:D

Seriously, though. It folded and fit so nicely. Great for travel. I’m glad we got it.

These apples… are so sweet. The first bite is like candy. And the shelf life is incredible. I think I mentioned it before, but they’re great. They didn’t even have to be sweet, they just had to last to impress me. Above and beyond the call of duty, right?

Eh… maybe not so much. I’m feeling better. I’ll organize a bit and then take a shower, maybe. Then write. Maybe take a nap later on. Try to wake up early and go grocery shopping with Adela. I wonder if the Attend will help. I haven’t touched it since I got here, so… yeah. Might be worth taking.

#breakup #slice of life #frustration #depression #getting over it #moving on #journal #a year ago today

0 notes

themusicjerk · 6 years ago

Text

A Tribe Called Quest - People’s Instinctive Travels And The Paths Of Rhythm

On my way back to Travis’s house to return his copy of Never Mind The Bollocks, I ran into my friend Dom. We started talking and I told him about my new blog. I showed him the CD Travis had lent me, told him how awful it was, and asked him how anyone could possibly think music was a worthwhile endeavor. He just laughed, went inside, and handed me another CD. A Tribe Called Quest, as I understand it, is a hip-hop group, and my brief exposure to hip-hop through the aural onslaught which is Drake’s “Best I Ever Had,” leaves me with no high hopes for this record. Dom insists that this album is nothing like Drake. I can only hope that’s true.

A Tribe Called Quest is composed of Q-Tip, Phife Dawg, Ali Shaheed Muhammed, and Jarobi White, so they were following in the Sex Pistols’ footsteps of having two people with gross names and two people with normal names. Perhaps when one’s parents are so self-centered as to name their child after a cottonswab, that child has no choice but to devote him or herself to the sordid and good for nothing trade of music. But I digress.

The album begins with the whooshing of wind chimes and echoes of gongs. Apparently, they recorded this on a very blustery day. A baby cries. I agree, baby. I agree. I will agree that this is unlike Drake - Drake at least made some effort to introduce a melody into his songs.

Once the baby finally shuts up, we are treated to a two bar drum loop with a piano line of ugly chords and a guitar riff repeated over and over again. Q-Tip starts monologuing about something or other - someone forgot to tell him that music is not theatre, music involves melody. At various points in the first song, “Push It Along,” the guitar, piano, and drums just stop playing entirely, as if to say, “If Q-Tip doesn’t want to try music, we shouldn’t either.” But then, like some sort of twisted Chinese water torture, the instruments come back in.

Four minutes in, they bring out a saxophone, the worst of all instruments. Saxophones are reedy, and listening to them sounds for all the world like someone wiggling a piece of wood in my ear. I’m almost happy to hear Q-Tip’s monologue return after the saxophone goes away - but perhaps that’s Stockholm Syndrome.

Remember my analogy to Chinese water torture? Five minutes into the song, you can hear the dripping. They did this on purpose. Over a one-bar bass and clapping loop, Q-Tip recites the title of the album and introduces the group, while they all hoot and holler behind him. “Music” is far too positive a word for this, and this from someone who hates music. I’d be happy to meet these people individually, but their insistence to “keep [the one-bar loop] rolling” suggests that knowing them would be to endure their brand of Chinese water torture.

“Luck Of Lucien” is the same thing - two-bar drum loop, guitar and bass lines in conflicting keys, stranger, monologuing on top. And what is he saying?

“But listen brother man, I really think you can Succeed with the breed of the brothers on your back It’s the creme de la creme, and you can vouch for that It’ll take a minute, rice, so take my advice Trust in us, and thus you trust in your life Lucien, Lucien, Lucien, Lucien - you should know” I don’t want to trust anyone who shoehorns lyrics about creamy minute rice into his soliloquys. Shakespeare must be rolling over in his grave.

The sound of a broken record player or possibly a man wiping a tablecloth with a sponge introduces the third song, “After Hours.” Unlike The Sex Pistols, who had to rely on vulgar noises from their own bodies and voices, A Tribe Called Quest is willing to bring in whatever vulgar noises from outside they might want, including chirping frogs.

I must say, though, Dom was absolutely right about this not sounding like Drake. In fact, of the three songs I knew before I started this project, this is most similar to Charles Mingus’ “Goodbye Pork Pie Hat” in that notes are thrown together haphazardly as if the composers had never heard what the major scale is actually supposed to sound like. At least the Sex Pistols used scales, and even they had more melody than this.

The torturous stop-and-start of the instrumentals makes me wonder if the band gets tired of playing their boring music. It doesn’t sound particularly difficult to play. Hold on, let me do some more research. Nobody? Nobody in this band played in an instrument? No wonder they’re stuck playing the same two bars over and over again. If none of them can play an instrument, and none of them can sing, where did they get the idea to be musicians? At least Steve Jones pretended to know how to play the guitar. To think Dom had the audacity to tell me this was BETTER than the Sex Pistols. Somehow, this has managed to be worse.

It would also explain why the out-of-tune trumpet blasts on “Footprints” seemed like a good idea to anyone. I hate music, and I know more about music than these guys. And just like the Sex Pistols, they appear to have invited marching Christmas carolers into the studio.

“I left my wallet in El Segundo?” Q-Tip isn’t even trying anymore. This isn’t a song. This is a complaint. This is a thing you mutter on the subway to your decreasingly enthused travel companions. Someone vaguely banging on things in the background that might as well just be the sound of a subway train going over train tracks and in and out of tunnels. I can get this experience just by riding my local bullet train.

“Pubic Enemy?” Did they even proofread this? There’s an ‘L’ in “public.” Also, anyone who writes a song about being a sexual skeeve should rethink their “pubic” [sic] image. Is the appeal of all music that we have "pubic” [sic] confessions from wanted criminals? Yesterday we humored anarchists and here perverts.

“There’s four friends of mine that thought they were bad And laid up this girl, so now, they’re sad.” That’s what guilt can lead to. So sorry you compromised your virtues and now have to suffer the consequences. Not.

“Bonita Applebum” features some strange kazoo-like instrument that is simultaneously sharp and flat that only plays when the other instruments get tired. This is clever because they’ve changed the game on us - no longer is the drum loop the anxiety-causing torturous drip, because now the silence is filled by something much worse.

Yes, you may “kick it,” if by “kick it,” you refer to leaving. At this point the drum beats don’t even sound like real drums, but distorted and warped like they were soaked in water beforehand, or perhaps replaced with a cow slowly being pressed through a loom against her will. I’m even starting to miss Johnny Rotten’s ear for cacophony, as it made me want to tear my own hair out considerably less.

In addition to the two-bar drum-and-bass loop and the bizarre recitation on “Youthful Expression,” the group has decided to artificially raise and lower the pitches of their voice for squeaky grievances reminiscent of a puppet show.

“No banana, I ain’t no primate,” Q-Tip repeats his preference for creamy minute rice. To each their own, I guess. Toward the end of the song, we get what might actually be enjoyable piano phrases - but again, repeated so endlessly that we’re sick of them before the already-played-out drum-and-bass loop comes back in full swing.

Sonically, nothing is happening on this record. Just like the Sex Pistols, the band has written the same song 12 times - except that there are 14 songs on this album. “Rhythm (Devoted To The Art Of Moving Butts),” for its vulgar name, seems to have based itself around the noise of an angry puma, or perhaps a dying macaw, which I can only imagine is complaining about the drum loop they’ve been forced to listen to on and off for the last forty minutes.

Dom did mention that the importance of hip-hop was in the lyrics, but lyrics like:

“You’re a disc jock, then jock this Rhythms can’t lose, rhythms can’t miss If you feel uptight and need to freak It’ll be all right once we drop this beat” Seem as vapid and puerile as you could expect any lyric to be.

“Mr. Muhammed” leads with a man singing the same three-note non-melody over and over again over a bass that sounds like a wet fart or a mud drill. This is punctuated by what is either a crowd cheering (for some unknown reason) or the sound of an ocean wave because a tsunami is approaching the studio. In Phife Dawg’s verse, he rhymes such exciting words as dish with dish, tense with tense, groove with groove, and it with no.

To further extol the virtues of minute rice, the group denounces ham and eggs. This is the closest thing to a melody I’ve heard since I started this project, but someone should tell the group that the emphasis in “cholesterol” is not on the last syllable. At least they tried. Phife also lets us in on a secret: his favorite foods are lemons and limes. What important lyrics these are.

“Go Ahead In The Rain,” distinguishes its two-bar loop with the sound of a lost and confused man saying, “huh?” as if he’s trying to figure out why this band is even allowed in the studio. Q-Tip even repeats “devoted to the art of moving butts,” indicating that he himself can’t tell the difference between any of these songs. Two-bar drum loop, rambling about minute rice on top, and occasionally dropping the beat because the non-existent band gets tired.

The last song on the album is called “Description of a Fool.” Let me see - wears glasses, hates music, and has best friends named Travis and Dom. That’s me. I’m a fool for having agreed to listen to this trash or to have started this project. I have a feeling that my friends are giving me the worst of the worst on purpose. I knew music was bad, but I didn’t know it could be this bad. I’m a fool for sitting here for the last hour hoping I would hear something good in this, only to be teased by maybe two seconds of enjoyable piano on a CD lasting over an hour. Q-Tip doesn’t even talk for the last two minutes of the album, he just leaves us with the same two-bar drum loop and a couple different repetitive guitar riffs. I wouldn’t be surprised to find that this album was made entirely from that GarageBand software that came with my MacBook.

GarageBand? More like GarbageBand. That’s my whole review of A Tribe Called Quest. Anyway, I have to go return Travis’s CD.

If you think music is good, send me music, and I will tell you why you are wrong!

#music jerk #the music jerk #music #review #music review #a tribe called quest #people's instinctive travels and the paths of rhythm

1 note · View note

mikeyd1986 · 7 years ago

Text

MIKEY’S PERSONAL BLOG 84, December 2017

On Christmas Eve, Mum and I attended the Carols by Twilight - Christmas Eve event held at Max Pawsey Reserve near Fountain Gate. It’s my second time going to a local Carols event, my first being over 6 years ago. As always, the event is run and organised by Casey City Church with many guest speakers and singers performing on stage including Andrew De Silva, He Planned Us and Gary Pinto. Of course, these Carols have a very Christian in orientation and whilst I don’t believe in God per se, it’s highly irrelevant. For me, it’s about being involved with the City of Casey community and celebrating the true meaning of Christmas...love, joy, peace, family, friends and being grateful for what you have in life.

We didn’t end up staying long as the weather decided to turn cold with a bitter, icy wind blowing across the reserve but it was still nice that we made the effort to listen to a few of the carols. After grabbing some coffees at Maccas, we decided to finally check out some Christmas lights. I was determined to visit the hugely popular display down at Hugo Court in Narre Warren to see what all the fuss was about. Getting down there early and finding a side street or court to park in is key because the traffic banks up very quickly.

We started by walking down Song Street with one house featuring two snow machines, creating lots of white foamy suds. It looked really cool. Making our way down to Hugo Court, there was literally people from the local CFA directing the crowd with glowing red wands. The moment we set foot into the court, it was bedlam. A cascade of brightly lit LED lights, inflatable Santas, Penguins, Snowmen, Reindeer, flashing signs, a radio station playing Christmas songs. But instead of being overwhelmed, I found it to be a truly magical experience. I had a ball taking photos and letting the atmosphere sink in.

The only downside was getting out of the area. A few drivers were getting impatient and rowdy. There was huge potential for road rage but thankfully Mum and I dodged a bullet. You just have to be really patient and be prepared that it can take up to 20 minutes to get yourself back onto Narre Warren-Cranbourne Road. But besides that, it was definitely worth going to. Hopefully I don’t leave it this late next year!

On Christmas Day, My parents and I had a busy morning ahead getting all the food prepared and cooked as well as decorating the outside patio area. It didn’t take long for me to start feeling exhausted but it came together really well. It’s a big area of strength for me, the creative side. We always go all out when it comes to Christmas and it’s easily my favourite part of the day.

In the afternoon, we had relatives over from my step-dad’s side of the family. We had a lovely roast for lunch which included chicken, ham, pork, potatoes, pumpkin, beans, peas and carrots. The conversations at the table were difficult for me to join in with as usual and when the topic turned to sexual predators and pedophiles, I was ready to exit stage left. I just feel so disturbed and uncomfortable hearing that stuff and that’s only so much I can handle before I have to leave.

In the late afternoon, we opened up our Christmas presents under the tree. I always find this experience to be both overwhelming and awkward. At least now that I’ve got an official diagnosis, it would explain why I’m not as “expressive” as I should be. From the outside looking in, most people would think I’m ungrateful due to my lack of excitement but it’s far from the case. It’s more I have no idea what to say besides thank you. I couldn’t be more grateful, I just don’t often show it with my non-verbal cues and body language (Autism 101).

In the evening, we had my Aunt, Uncle and Cousins come over for dinner. I decided to have a Nanna nap before they arrived as I was feeling buggered as. The food we served up was similar to our lunch with a selection of chicken, pork and ham plus coleslaw, potatoes and pasta salad. We engaged in the usual tradition of pulling Christmas crackers, wearing paper hats and reading the lame jokes inside of them.

It’s true that I’m still very reserved, socially awkward and sensitive even around my family but it’s something that I’m continuing to work on embracing and accepting. It was a really long day for me overall but the upside is that we didn’t have to travel anywhere today and the weather was lovely throughout the day.

On Boxing Day aka “Recovery Day”, we spent the morning sitting around the dining table eating bacon and eggs for breakfast, talking about how dodgy our current government are and how the oil companies are ripping us off when it comes to the price of petrol. I honestly felt like a zombie crawling out of bed after all the food and alcohol I consumed yesterday. Thankfully, no hangover though! Then comes to fun part of cleaning everything up and packing away all the decorations. One step at a time though.

I spent most of the afternoon just resting up and trying to catch up on some sleep. The last thing I wanted to do was rush out to the Boxing Day sales. Seriously FUCK THAT! I’d rather shop online to be honest. In fact, I decided to buy a few Christmas sweaters from eBay ready for next Christmas. My cat Lotus decided to join me for a nap for the first time ever on my bed. It’s good to see that she’s finally warmed up to my bedroom and my bed.

On Wednesday morning, Mum and I both had well overdue full body Chinese massages at Best Body Massage in Eden Rise, Berwick. Best Body is basically just Top 1 Therapy trading under a different business name but offering the same deals. I opted for a deep tissue massage with hot stones which only cost me $45 for a whole hour. The guy did a very thorough job getting all of those knots undone and relieving a lot of tension through my back, shoulders, neck and spine. Pretty much over a month’s worth of stress, anxiety and muscle soreness.

This place is still unfortunately plagued with the same issues as Top 1 Therapy. Don’t expect to get much conversation from your massage therapist unless you’re fluent in Mandarin. Also, they could really benefit from having a staff member act as a permanent receptionist and door greeter as the guy doing my massage had to constantly rush off to attend to phone calls and customers dropping in. Basically, they’re lacking in the customer service department but considering I’m only paying $45 instead of $100 and the therapists are highly skilled in what they do, I can let the cons slide. http://edenrisevillage.com.au/store...

On Thursday morning, Mum and I visited the Cranbourne Hyundai Used Car Dealership to begin the search for my fourth car. We were both wearing our invisible “JUST LOOKING” t-shirts as I’m still extremely guarded and weary when it comes to car salesmen. Thankfully the guy who looked after us, Rod, was quite easy going and pleasant to deal with. He didn’t pressure us to make a sale at all, nor was he holding “grand sale” balloons like Pennywise The Dancing Clown (A sure bet to run in the opposite direction!).

I brought along my list of potential cars that I wanted to have a look at including a 2014 Hyundai i30 Active GD2, a 2013 Kia Cerato S TD and a 2011 Ford Fiesta Zetec WS. I was leaning the hardest towards the i30 and even briefly sat in the car to check out some of the features. I wrote down some “must haves” including a CD player, keyless entry, rego, 3 year warranty, low kilometers under 100k and priced under $15,000. It pretty much ticked all those boxes but I refused to sign any paperwork yet. I’d rather have a few models to consider and make sure I’m 100% happy with the next car I purchase. http://www.cranbournehyundai.com.au/...

On Thursday night, I attended my Body Balance class with Rowena at YMCA Casey RACE. It’s been a couple of weeks since I last went to a group fitness class so evidently I was feeling pretty out of practice tonight but it didn’t take long to pick things up. Rowena had a strong Irish accent and was very bubbly throughout the class.

We did our usual sequence of exercises during the class including: Tai-Chi Warmup (Swan Dive, Overhead arm circles), Sun Salutations (Forward Fold, Downward Facing Dog, Plank, Baby Cobra), Standing Strength & Balances (Warrior 2, Sun Warrior, Side Angle Pose, Triangle Pose, Half Moon Pose), Pilates (Bicycle Crunches, Firefly, Arm and Leg balances, Knee to Nose), Twists & Hamstring Stretches (Butterfly Forward Fold, Serpentine Twist with Leg Extension) and Relaxation. https://www.lesmills.com/workouts/f...

On Friday morning, Mum and I returned to the Cranbourne Hyundai Used Car Dealership for a second look. Thankfully I didn’t have to deal with any Max Kirwin type used car salesman (Good one Max? More like get the fuck away from me Max!) as Rod was there again. As I was walking through the middle of the yard, one of the cars immediately caught my attention. It was a dark blue coloured 2015 Hyundai Accent sedan. On closer inspection, it pretty much ticked all the boxes on my wishlist and inside I knew that this was “the one”.

Rod sat myself and Mum down inside his office. The space was clinical white and undecorated aside from the Hyundai logo and a few certificates on the wall. The anxiety levels were building rapidly inside of me but I knew that if I didn’t put the car on hold today, I would probably regret it. Still I find the whole process of signing contracts and paperwork to be extremely daunting. After sorting out some technical issues, we managed to get the ball rolling and Rod even put a personalised “SOLD” sign inside the car for me. I’ll be finalising the transaction and picking it up next week if all goes well.

On Friday night, I went to an RPM Express class with Laura at YMCA Casey RACE in Cranbourne East. Being the Christmas holidays and also the fact that it was wet and humid outside, there was only 3 people in tonight’s class but it was no surprise. I was still determined to get a really good workout done and I decided to turn up the resistance quite a few times up to 40-50%. The mountain climbing sections were easily the hardest for me but I was burning heaps through my knees, glutes and thighs.

I was also more focused on the wattage display and tried hard to get it over 170-200W. I was a good feeling pushing myself as hard as I could on the bike and being an express class, it was much shorter than usual. https://www.lesmills.com/workouts/f...

2017 has been a year of major growth for me. From having the strength and courage to turn down and walk away from people and situations that no longer serve me well to having emotional breakdowns in front of my former personal trainer to getting counselling and a formal diagnosis for mild Autism. I've done a lot of personal development, worked on improving my mental health issues and put myself out of my comfort zone (Do It In A Dress charity event, work Christmas function, Yoga Retreat in Moggs Creek).

It's been a huge year for fitness, trying out new things (Strength & Conditioning, Bootcamp, CrossFit, Water Workout, Swimming, Spa and Sauna) and pushing myself really hard to achieve results. There's been plenty of bumps in the road along the way from changing gyms to yoga studios closing down but none of these things have hindered me.

It's been a really tough year financially for me but I've always tried to persevere and get myself through it. I didn't attend as many local gigs as I would have liked to this year but many hurdles got in the way. Hopefully my attendance will pick up in 2018 as I find a better way to balance my life. However, I feel like my contribution was still significant in terms of writing reviews, band promotion, buying merch and sharing band related posts.

Thank you to all of my family and friends for sticking by me and supporting me this year.

MY GOALS FOR 2018 SO FAR 1. Buying myself a new car, probably an ex-demo 2016 Hyundai i30 or similar at Cranbourne Hyundai.

2. Joining an art/painting/life drawing class in Berwick.

3. Travelling to places including Redwood Forest in East Warburton and Launceston, Tasmania.

4. Continuing to write blogs, reviews, interviews with Behind The Scene and supporting the local music scene. Increasing my attendance at local gigs.

5. Regular yoga classes with Keren Gurrieri at Body Yoga.

6. PT sessions/Group sessions at The Yard Strength & Fitness with Mandi Herauville and Erynne McCrorey.

7. Burning body fat and gaining lean muscle around the arms, legs, thighs, stomach, back, hips, glutes etc. Losing another 5-10kg.

8. Joining a support group to help with my mental health issues and emotional wellbeing e.g. GROW group, The Anxiety Disorders Association of Victoria (ADAVIC).

9. Joining another cooking class at Balla Balla Community Centre.

10. Continuing to work on improving my self-confidence, self-care and personal development to become a better person.

11. Continuing to attend Group Fitness classes and seminars at YMCA Casey ARC and YMCA Casey RACE. Trying new classes including Aqua Cycle, Aqua Yoga, Virtual fitness classes.

12. Volunteering at an Animal Shelter, caring for domestic pets.

0 notes

mysurveys · 7 years ago

Text

Random Qs

Survey #43 on the Countdown to 2018!

I've been a bit sick for awhile, but then I was just lazy. Here's one from the 7th this month.

What’s one thing you'll never do?

Murder? It's honestly difficult to be sure you'd never do something. I mean, anyone can just fracking snap, but I certainly don't think I'd ever lose it and do that, or commit rape or torture. God forbid.

"Be a Republican." <- LOL UR SO COOL

I wasn’t for Trump personally, but I would never vote for Hillary as she’s a criminal and she facilitated her husband's cover-ups of sexual misconduct.

Nor would I ever join a party that's been doing likewise for a slew of other sexual predators since Kennedy while touting that Repubs are the ones waging a war on women.

But that's just me, I'm not a nasty woman. #NeverHillary

How would your parents react if you got a tattoo?

They would be sincerely shocked because such are against our shared religious beliefs.

What’s your favorite kind of weather?

I love the cold and the snow the most, but I also love thunderstorms and rain showers.

How do you feel about Twitter?

I'm not Twitterpated and the content is abysmal.

Do you know what 45s are?

That number can honestly refer to several things.

Whose singing voice do you fall in love with every time you hear it?

I don't really feel that way about anyone’s vocals.

Do you hate when people whistle all the time?

I've never encountered such, but it would grate on my nerves eventually.

What email service do you use?

My main one is on Gmail since I own a Chromebook, but I have others elsewhere on sites like GMX. It’s good to have alternatives and backups.

What was the last thing you bought online?

One of my Christmas gifts, the Pokeball N2DS XL as I'll be giving my old black N3DS to Wyatt for Christmas.

Do you like scrambled eggs with ham?

I don't eat them with ham, but I love them with cheddar cheese and bacon.

Do you own a phonograph, which is a record player?

I don’t, but I love those and other retro items.

What was the last CD you bought?

I rarely buy CDs so I have no idea.

What color are the walls in your bedroom?

They're just made up of white paneling.

What did you do yesterday?

It was a very chill evening for me. I went to bed in the AM and got up after dark. Sometimes I sleep more when it's cold out, but I'm also up at night now since it's been raining a lot.

Most of my evening was just spent watching TV shows. I finally watched over half of the Forged In Fire: Bladesgiving episode since I'm a sucker for rugged dudebros and carnage.

Do you go crazy when you’re not working or doing school work?

I'm no longer in school and happy of it, but I can't have a paid job either due to learning disabilities. I've got a little nonprofit group doing fringe work, though.

If I'm not doing some form of work, I'm not prone to boredom. I'm very content in my own mind so I can sit in a waiting room doing nothing for about two hours before I've got to move my body.

What song can always make you feel like getting up and dancing?

Nothing always elicits the exact same react from me every time since my personality isn’t one-dimensional.

Do you have a favorite piece of jewelry?

My Christian fish ring that my maternal grandmother gave me is my fave.

What was the last thing you wrote down on a piece of paper?

I wrote down a list of shows to eventually get into.

Is there anyone you can picture yourself being with forever right now?

There isn't anyone like that for me currently, and I'd be just fine never having a boyfriend or husband.

A man isn't required to make me whole, content or fulfilled in life and I don't ever want children. I've never had dreams of settling down with someone.

In your opinion, what’s the nicest thing someone can do?

Making the ultimate sacrifice is obviously the biggest gift you can give.

Dying for another is a mostly selfless act of compassion. Although humans never really do anything without considering the benefit to themselves, there's still nothing greater than sacrificial love of the highest order.

Can dreams really come true?

Not if they're just relegated to dreaming. You have to turn them into actual life goals and pursue them passionately more often than not, even though you might end up getting a golden opportunity otherwise.

Life isn't fair so you might never get such and even your best efforts might be in vain, but it's better to get up and give it a go.

You can ask your hero one question, so what do you ask?

I don't call them "heroes" so much as role models and I don't need to ask other humans anything. There's just a lot of things that I would ask God about given the chance. Humans don't always have good answers.

What store can you spend hours in?

Ugh, that would be so boring. I usually know what I'm looking for so I just hustle and get it done.

Have you ever been sunburned so bad your skin started to peel?

Only every time I'm sunburned. It never tans me.

Does the future scare you and if so, why?

I don't have unreasonable fears anymore, they're strictly situational as fear's only purpose is to warn you when something's wrong. Otherwise it's a waste of time and energy.

I've conquered all my old phobias through exposure therapy and the more I did so the more others just faded away.

As to the future specifically, why worry over something that could easily go either way? As long as you're proactive about the right things, you should just cross your bridges when you come to them and burn them if you must.

How would you describe your perfect partner?

Perfection is an illusion and yearning for an ideal is useless. I actively seek partners who have most of my major preferences, but any relationship takes work and will have its struggles.

There's really just varying degrees of compatibility. That's something I can easily gauge now that I'm an adult, which has benefited me greatly. All of my relationships since have been wonderful.

What movie can make you cry no matter what?

Again, I'm not one-dimensional so I won't always respond the same exact way to something.

Would you rather live during 1965 or 2065?

I'm fine with my time period, thanks.

Who's your truest friend?

My golden kinstone has always been my mother. She's been with me and there for me all of my life, save for some times during my childhood that just left her at a loss.

We've moved passed those things, but I'm glad they happened. Such hardships make relationships stronger if you don't allow them to tear you apart. 💗

#randomqs #surveys

0 notes

hivikings-blog · 7 years ago

Text

I’m so excited, I’m so excited, I’m so.....scared.

After a very exciting 3 weeks full of pasta in Italy, showing my mom the beauty of Oslo in the summer, and my first trip to the fjords with my American girl friends....

.....I am in Oslo alone.

Oh my god.

I did it.

I’d be lying if I told you I didn’t feel pretty damn proud of myself for this feat. But if you also guessed that maybe right now I am slightly scared out of my mind?

I think this is pretty natural given the whole “moving to a foreign country” thing I have going on.

My move to California when I was 23 was pretty scary and while that was about the same distance in miles as Norway is from my hometown in Virginia, this is a whole different animal.

In LA, I could still go to the grocery store and find Cheez itz when I needed to drown my homesickness in my favorite comfort food. I could look at my weather app and immediately know the temperature without converting it from celsius to fahrenheit. I could Facebook message my family and friends during “normal business hours” without worrying I’d wake them up. (seriously, who are you people who don’t turn your phones on silent at night?)

I can’t do those things in Norway.

That’s not a complaint. As scary it is to be in a foreign place all by myself, it also feels so fucking cool to have shaken up my life this much.

Excitement is still the dominant emotion, but I think it’s important to talk about the hard things too. So what are some of the things I’m scared of?

1. I won’t have friends.

It took me about 2 years to find a group of solid people in LA who I actually felt like I could trust and whom I saw more than twice a year. This was pretty traumatic for me given that when I moved there I was leaving behind about 238 friends, many of which I had known since I was in elementary school.

But I’m happy to report that even after only two weeks here, I have one new American friend, two Norwegian friends who actually DO want to hang out with me, and plans on both Saturday AND Sunday this weekend.

(I had heard a lot about how Norwegians are hard to get to know. Not in an intentionally mean way but they aren’t like Americans who are more like “Hi here’s my life story wanna hang out?!”

And by “like Americans” I mean “like me” who’s rarely met a stranger I can’t have at least a 15 minute conversation with.)

Pro tip: if you are considering your own move internationally, or heck, even nationally: join Facebook groups for people who are new to the area, tell anyone who will listen where you are moving because you never know who knows somebody who knows somebody who knows somebody in your new location.

2. I will be broke and homeless.

This is not a new or uniquely Norway related fear, mind you. I have had this fear in the back of my head since I graduated college, and trust me, I’m making much more than I was making then and I’ve still never been on the street.

I am incredibly fortunate to have the job and salary here that I do, so this fear is probably completely irrational, just like it was in the US.

But Norway is expensive.

For example, back in September when I was here, even the Norwegian Starbucks were advertising the queen of all basic bitch drinks: the pumpkin spice latte. My Norwegian friend had never had one, so I bought them for us.

Total cost for 2 grande PS lattes: $13.

Yes girl, REALLY.

Yesterday I went and did a full grocery shop now that my vacation days of spending like I’m a Kardashian are over. I got some veggies, fruit, shrimp, salmon, eggs, 3 kinds of cheese (don’t you dare judge me), yogurt, milk, ham, and bread.....for $120.

While on the bright side I have discovered a new diet called “Move to Norway where you can’t afford to indulge your cravings” on the downside I need to not have random Fat Girl Tuesdays if I want to be able to afford the other stupid things I spend my money on and definitely don’t need.

To put this in perspective, however, my healthcare is free. Yeah, chew on that, Trump. Government sponsored healthcare that works and that people are happy with. IMAGINE THAT. So when I think about it that way: would I rather pay for surgery should I need it....or $7 for an eggplant.....I’ll choose the expensive eggplant, thank you.

(part of the reason things are so expensive is the high taxes Norway has that entitle it’s citizens to (mostly) free healthcare and education. And while I am not a citizen I am a legally approved resident who also gets access to these perks. Hence, $7 vegetables.)

Pro tip: before moving internationally make sure you understand the cost of living in a country and that you are financially comfortable. Having “lived” here throughout the past year I was well aware of what things cost and saved a lot in prep. I know I am not going to blow through my savings, but I feel better with a big cushion.

Pro tip #2: please don’t move to an expensive foreign country without a job. That is a dumb move. (and in many cases, a very hard visa to secure) If you’re marrying someone, that’s different, because I assume you and your spouse have discussed this. But if you are single like I am, I do not recommend having a sense of “adventure” and quitting your current job and then trying to figure it out. That will lead to a hell of a lot of stress and an ending that could involve you moving back into mom’s basement and desperately looking for a job in your native country.

3. I’ll behave like “that kind” of American.

I will never forget when my family lived in Australia and one of my friends told me I talked about America too much. Even then, when I was 14, I knew that kind of American was annoying AF and I never want to be “that guy.”

I have been extra cognizant of this each time I have come to Norway. I try not to compare how Norway does things to how the US does. I try not to talk too loudly. (As anyone who knows me will attest, this is very hard for me) I apologize any time someone speaks to me in Norwegian and I have to ask them to speak in English.

I refuse to be one of those ignorant Americans who expects the world to adjust to my expectations/comforts/convenience. If i wanted to live in a country exactly like America then I wouldn’t have moved to Norway now would I? I think some people forget that.

I will be learning Norwegian, I’ll become obsessed with skiing, hell, I’ll even try lutefisk. Because that is part of the adventure. I moved here for new things; not just the same things but with more snow.

Pro tip: read up about your new country a little bit or, if you can get lucky like I did, live there for a little while before making the leap. At the VERY least I think you should visit for at least a week. Make sure you can handle the cultural differences without making a big deal about it. Most of Norway is closed on Sundays. Doesn’t bother me, but definitely bothers some people. Try to learn those little nuances before you go so you are mentally prepared for them and not traumatized and/or become a massive complainer that no one wants to be around.

There you have it: the honest truth about my fears on my new adventure. Its one of the most exciting things I’ve ever done, but it’s also one of the scariest, and that is ok! Major life changes should be both of those things. And how scary they will be is all about how you approach it.

If I choose to sit in my apartment and not make any effort to meet people, then yes, my first fear of no friends will come true. I may end up broke and homeless if I act like the Norwegian version of 2 Chainz in a strip club and spend money frivolously. All of these fears are easy to avoid with a little effort, it’s up to you to make it.

0 notes

junker-town · 8 years ago

Text

‘Bachelorette’ Episode 3 recap: Shirts come off for Ellen Degeneres, the guys mud wrestle, Lee is truly awful

There were some lovely moments and some very troubling ones.

Hello, Sports Bachelor Nation, and thank you for joining me on this Monday night as we watch Rachel Lindsay search for love. Last week, after Rachel and DeMario had a fair amount of chemistry at the basketball date, DeMario’s girlfriend, or maybe ex-girlfriend, or maybe not ex-girlfriend, showed up and claimed she was still his girlfriend. DeMario pretended not to know who she was. He literally said, “Who is this?” Which is not a smart thing to say when it quickly becomes clear that you actually know who someone is.

Rachel sent DeMario home. But because this is The Bachelorette, DeMario did not go home. No, DeMario showed up at the cocktail party.

Which is where OUR party begins this week.

RACHEL SHUTS DEMARIO ALL THE WAY DOWN

Rachel agrees to hear DeMario out. DeMario proceeds to beg Rachel to take him back, as men who realize they have made mistakes with women are wont to do. Over the course of his speech, he says his Uber driver told him, “In order to experience joy, you need pain.” Rachel nods. Then she proceeds to deliver the most fire breakup speech I have ever heard.

“What I saw what you did in the gym yesterday? That was a boy. I’m looking for a man...I’m glad this has been a life lesson. I’m glad you gave me the quote about the joy and the pain. I hope the pain you’ve gotten from this gives you joy somewhere else, it’s just not here right now. Thank you.”

THANK YOU. She ends it with “THANK YOU.”

When Rachel comes back through the gates without DeMario, the other men, who’ve all been watching, look gleeful, like a large gaggle of car salesmen who each sold a brand new Chrysler with extra bells and whistles for at least $5,000 more than the asking price.

“He’s not coming back is he?” asks one of the guys.

“Fuck no,” says Rachel.

A few other things that happen at the cocktail party:

Jonathan, who lists his profession as a Tickle Monster, shows up with gigantic, stuffed hands. They have creepy, long fingers and look like something from a cartoon horror movie, except they’re real. Rachel laughs. I shudder.

All the guys are like, “I don’t think Rachel is one to be messed with.”

Let's give Rachel a big hand for standing her ground! #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/u7Nhv1Wdps

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 6, 2017

BLAKE AND LUCAS ARE REALLY SOMETHING, ALRIGHT

Before the rose ceremony, Lucas, the Whaboom Guy, tells Rachel he thinks Blake has a crush on him, because he says Blake stood over his head while he was sleeping and licked a banana. Blake tells Rachel there’s no way he could’ve done this, because he doesn’t eat carbs, because he’s on a ketogenic diet. And bananas are carbs.

I’m assuming that at least one of these two asshats make it through to the next round, because that’s what always happens.

AND THEN RACHEL KICKS THEM BOTH OFF

Rachel seriously dunks on the producers by getting rid of the two guys who ham it up most for the camera. Listen, the Bachelor or Bachelorette never does this. JoJo kept Chad, his protein powder, and his meat sticks around for way too long, and Nick met Corinne’s goddamn family.

But Rachel is like, mmm, let me think about this... NOPE. And gives them the boot.

Afterwards, Lucas is talking to the camera, and if his slurred speech and half-mast eyes are any indication, he’s beyond hammered. He reminds me of guys I went to college with who’d get wasted and be like, “So, dya like t’make outwith lacrosh playrs? I played in highshhool.”

Wha-Bananas?!? #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/oGRTCSuW3g

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 6, 2017

As Lucas is talking to the camera, Blake goes over to him.

“Sup bro,” says Blake.

“Sup,” says Lucas.

"I just wanna say ... fuck you, you're a piece of shit,” says Blake.

“Go back to your protein shakes,” Lucas says. “Go back to your steroids. Just go back to your fucking garbage clown life, dude.”

Incredible dialogue. I wish I could write shit like this. Blake and Lucas, who are clearly acting, will go on Bachelor in Paradise, which was definitely their end game. They’re probably best friends in real life. I almost respect how Wrong their Reasons were.

THE MEN GET NAKED ON THE ELLEN SHOW AND FRED GETS SAD

Rachel takes her big boys to the Ellen Show, where they all get naked (just kidding, they keep their pants on) and dance up on giddy audience members, including someone’s grandmother. They have nice abs. I respect Rachel for finding ways to view these men without their shirts on before the first pool party. She’s a real innovator.

Ellen Degeneres then asks the men a series of questions, which includes, “Have you imagined having sex with Rachel?” That first question feels a little obvious; I operate under the assumption that most straight men imagine having sex with most women they meet, let alone one they are actively trying to eventually have sex with, if all goes well.

During this course of questioning we also learn that Alex already peed in the Bachelor pool, and that Fred had sex with a forty-year-old when he was 21. Respect.

Speaking of Fred: Rachel was his camp counselor when he was little, and he’s clearly been in love with her since then in that soul-crushing, you’re-the-first-person-I-ever-realized-could-make-me-feel-this-way way. He asks her if he can kiss her, which is awkward. She tells him it’s awkward, he kisses her anyway, and I cringe. Then she says to the camera: “It was like a little boy was kissing me.”

Oof. Not great, Bob. Rachel very graciously sends Fred home when it becomes clear she cannot reciprocate his feelings. Fred, if you’re out there: I hope you’re doing okay, buddy.

ANTHONY’S HORSE DATE

YES! ANTHONY FINALLY GETS A DATE!

We haven’t seen enough of Anthony, but he’s a very handsome Fullbright scholar, so I have high hopes for him. He’s never ridden a horse before, which is too bad, because he’s about to have to: He and Rachel mount majestic beasts and parade down Rodeo Drive in front of a school bus full of people shouting “OH MY GOD, IT’S RACHEL!!!”

Just another day on Rodeo Drive! #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/JN3H0hwKGK

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 6, 2017

Why horses? I don’t know, but I fear its a play on Rodeo Drive. Rachel and Anthony ride their horses into a cowboy boot store. I’ve never been to L.A., so I’m not sure if this is an L.A. thing or a We’re The Bachelorette and Can Do Whatever We Want thing. They each purchase a red pair of cowboy boots.

There doesn’t seem to be a ton of chemistry between Rachel and Anthony, but I’m hoping the night date proves me wrong. Peter really screwed everyone over with that dog date.

NIGHT DATE

After a nice dinner on a hill overlooking the city, Anthony and Rachel dance together in front of a quartet. They both seem to have a nice time, and there’s definitely more chemistry than there was during the day date. I’m not sure the fireworks are there they way they were with Peter, but who knows — maybe this love will blossom more slowly. Speaking of blossoms, Rachel gives Anthony a rose.

LEE IS TERRIBLE

Back at the house, the night before the next group date, Eric says he’s invested in Rachel, but he’s not sure she’s invested in him. Iggy says he’s been listening to Eric’s insecurities all day, so he goes over to where Eric is sitting. He’s like, so you’re worried Rachel isn’t here for the right reasons? And Eric is like, no, I’m not saying that. I’m saying that she’s doing what she has to do to get what she wants. Iggy swears at Eric, but it’s so bleeped out that I can’t understand what it was.

Then Eric says this, which I think is a reasonable thing to ask someone you’re trying to marry:

“You’re not going to give a girl you’re not going to marry your all. It’s like, do you like me, yes or no?”

Iggy asks Eric if he’s going to ask Rachel that specifically, and Eric says “[bleep] yeah.” Iggy’s like, then what’s the point of this conversation? And Eric’s like, I don’t know, dude, you’re the one who came over here. Both men raise their voices. Then Lee comes over and starts trying to goad Eric.

We have to talk about Lee.

Last week, Lee’s alleged tweets surfaced.

Gotta love how @BacheloretteABC casts Lee...wonder how @TheRachLindsay feels about it? #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/RX6lkGpgyB

— Erika (@emesola) May 31, 2017

Lee’s account is private. His bio says “pleasantly offensive.” ABC declined to comment on the veracity of the tweets to Variety, but in them, Lee says he hates Islam, supports the “inhumane torture of terrorists,” doesn’t trust female liberals or men who own cats, and endorses a video that “destroys the liberal narrative on the Alton Sterling shooting.” One reads: “What’s the difference between the NAACP and the KKK? Wait for it…One has the sense of shame to cover their racist a– faces.”

An insider told Variety that ABC didn’t know about the tweets. If they didn’t, that’s a huge oversight in the vetting process. If they did know and let him on anyway, this is straight-up unconscionable. A guy like this doesn’t set the stage for fun reality show drama, like Chad, who merely ate all the deli meat last season. It’s setting the stage real, ugly and dangerous interaction.

RACHEL’S FRIENDS FROM NICK’S SEASON SHOW UP AND THEY GO MUD WRESTLING

Raven, Corinne, Jasmine and Alexis show up from Nick’s season to tag along on the next group date. I’m embarrassingly thrilled to see them (side note: you know it’s time to reevaluate some things when the contestants of this godforsaken franchise start to feel like friends).

Could it be Cheese Pasta Wrestling? #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/mMOThXGT7b

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 6, 2017

It must be so nice for Rachel to have some friends along at this mud wrestling bar. The part of The Bachelorette that always seems the worst to me is when you have to go on a group date with, like, eight dudes and none of your girlfriends to whisper to when the guys inevitably start being creepy or boring. Also, ten bucks that the majority of these dudes immediately started trying to date the ex-Bachelor girls after they got kicked off. I bet Raven and Brady are, like, married now.

Kenny is very excited about the wrestling, given that he’s a professional wrestler. He yells, “TIME FOR THE PRETTY BOY PITT BULL TO GET BUSY!” And then he barks. I love Kenny.

Bryce says he considers himself the most athletic guy in the house. Meanwhile, Brady reminds me of Toad from Mario Kart — it’s not specifically looks, it’s more essence:

See what I mean?

Anyway, Bryce beats Kenny at mud wrestling, which seems like a real hit to Kenny’s pro-wrestling brand, but I’m going to just chalk it up to an off day. I’m mostly impressed by Rachel’s continued ability to find ways to get these guys to take off their shirts.

KENNY!!!!

Kenny is a bright spot this season. During the night portion of the group date, he tells Rachel he used to be a Chippendale dancer, rips his tank top off, and starts dancing up on her. She’s laughing. I’m laughing. Kenny won’t win, but Kenny is my dude so far. What a world!

Kenny, a man with layers! #TheBachelorette http://pic.twitter.com/qnIi79m0WV

— The Bachelorette (@BacheloretteABC) June 6, 2017

ERIC TELLS RACHEL HE’S VULNERABLE

Eric tells Rachel in a one-on-one conversation that he’s “been running from my feelings my whole life.” She says, “I see you, and I’m happy you’re here, and I’m feeling that.” She gives him the rose for the group date.

AND THEN EVERYTHING IS BAD

So it turns out that on the bus on the way to the wrestling bar, one of Rachel’s friends started asking the guys who they think might not be there for the Right Reasons. Two of the guys said Eric wasn’t.

Well, whaddaya know, the two guys who said that were Bryce and Lee. Rachel tells Eric she’s worried that if two guys said this, maybe it’s true, and that her antenna will be up.

Eric asks Lee why he said that. Lee smiles this evil smile and launches into this cruel back-and-forth where he tells Eric that Eric isn’t ready for love, and shames him for not having had a serious girlfriend. Eric is like, “Why are you doing this?” and Lee, between mean comments, is like, “I love you to death, and think you’re an amazing individual.” It’s the creepiest, most two-faced thing I’ve seen on this show before. You can tell Eric knows what’s going on, too. At one point he asks Lee, “Are you afraid of me?”

What’s also deeply troubling is that unless viewers read an article about Lee’s alleged self-proclaimed bigotry — which ABC has not confirmed, but has not denied — before tonight, most of America probably doesn’t know about it as they watch. From what we’ve seen so far in the show, Rachel doesn’t know at this point either.

To the camera, Lee says that Eric is “One kid with a bad issue. I think there are better guys for [Rachel]. Her best friends gave her information and she goes against them.”

He also says, in an aside, that the shit-talking is fun.

UGH

One of my friends texted me during the show to ask if the season was fun. It was for the first two episodes, I said. But Lee is a huge downer — it’s impossible to watch him as the standard Bachelor villain when he’s a real one of the worst variety.

I wish Lee hadn’t been put on TV, and I hope he’s gone very soon. Rachel is doing this show with as much integrity as you possibly can, and it’s a shame that Lee casts such a shadow over it.

0 notes

lodryons · 8 years ago

Text

Madrid

Hola! They speak Spanish in Spain. Makes sense. Portuguese in Portugal. Man, these people are consistent. Everyone here is tan and beautiful too. Americans really were the undesirables. Murderers and uglies breeding for centuries really messes with a society. I’m just kidding, we have Kim Kardashian, she’s a real beauty (except for like everything on her body but it’s what is inside of her that matters, Mr. West!).

I flew with TAP Portugal or air Portugal TAP? Whatever. It was really nice. The seats looked crisp and felt new. They even had a universal outlet for each chair. This is luxury ladies and gentleman. My phone that gets 2G via shitty T-Mobile is now at 100%!

I met a man from NYC that moved here 3 years ago and he says he loves it. He’s finishing his Ph.D. here in psychology. It’s costing him 600 euros. I do wonder if the quality of education is comparable to our $50K/year system. Probably not. He was telling me they speak weird Spanish here (or maybe we’re the weird ones?) and in Barcelona, they speak something called Catalina which is even weirder. Apparently, the Spanish people have the best work-life balance. Generally starting work at 10 AM and working until 2 PM. From 2 PM - 4:30 PM they will eat lunch. From 5PM-9PM they will finish work and then eat dinner around 11 PM or midnight. He also mentioned that if it’s nice outside absolutely no one is inside. They must not have video games here.

I tried another latte and I’m getting closer to something latte-ish. You’d think espresso and milk would taste the same everywhere but the leche in Spain is weird I think. I’ll wait for Rome to get a proper one. Everyone drinks espresso here anyways. Gross.

Lost one of the tips to my $80 earbuds. That’s like $40 in tips lost. Luckily I got a free pair of the absolute worst earbuds from Delta and cannibalized its tips and they fit! I was just describing to someone how I absolutely hate everything about earbud tips. A new 1st world problem in my life!

Apparently, they love Fish here too. God dammit.

I keep thinking people are speaking Russian in my hostel when really it’s Spanish or Portuguese. I even asked a girl if she was from Russia and she was from Portugal. I was in Portugal. I didn’t ask anyone else that question.

A friend recommended I try out this great app called Lonely Planet. Found a great tapas place (read: snackys) last night and spent many euros on lots of great ham, veal meatballs, blood sausage and some potato ball things. An American from New York overheard us talking in English and was delighted to find someone to chat with. He’s here on business with a bunch of people from his company that’s in the Oil & Gas industry. It’s probably because I’m an Elon Musk fanboy but I felt like he had just told me he works for the Tobacco industry. It’s not a fair view. He seemed like a nice guy. Probably drives an electric car.

I slept 11 hours last night. In reality, the quality of sleep is about 50-60% since you’re woken up about every 15-30 minutes by someone snoring, rummaging through their belongings, turning a light on, speaking in their outdoor voice to one another or entering/exiting the room. There is a reason it costs 30 euros to sleep in these beautiful establishments.

I failed to secure a latte today. I was sure I was on the right track. The woman asked me if by latte I meant coffee in milk! Yes. This is progress. I said oh no, espresso in milk! I might have thrown out an “espresso con leche!” Which I don’t think is right because she just smiled and then said something slightly different. I didn’t specify the volume of milk and so I received essentially an espresso with a dash of milk. Still, this is progress. I’ll order an espresso con mucho leche next time.

I tried but couldn’t find a damn cafe that had both WiFi and an outlet. So I went to Starbucks. Within 3 minutes of being there, a group of 3 American girls (I think) sat near me and sounded basic as hell. I’m not judging but damn that’s impressive. They’ve gone worldwide at this point. I must say the internet & quality of latte at Starbucks in Madrid was quite good.

One of the most interesting things about sleeping in a hostel room is experiencing each person’s take on nighttime civility. Being American I will generalize this to how every member of their home country acts at night too. Everyone that practices Islam is a terrorist right? I’d say that Americans might be described as stupid and fat but in my opinion, we take the cake when it comes to nighttime politeness. We at least do that annoying “Shhh!” thing to each other. From what I can tell most people not in America think that chatting at full volume to each other past midnight when there are 4 people sleeping around them is normal. I wish I understood what they were saying because perhaps it’s warranted. For example, “My mum slept with the neighbor again. Dad’s buying another boat to spite her.” I’d forgive that.

This morning I had 4 snorers and one guy sleep through his alarm for at least 20 minutes. I just left. How haven’t we solved snoring as a society? I think there should be a Richter scale for snoring and your rating is placed on your license. Then we can bucket people of similar ratings in rooms by law. I’m running for president on this.

I did a walking tour yesterday. Easily the worst and best tour I’ve ever had. The gentleman was quite nice and eccentric but his accent made everything rather hard to understand and he didn’t speak loudly at all. I met some cool Americans studying in Rome for the semester that were doing a vacation across a few cities in Spain. One of them is actually studying Computer Science at Michigan right now. Small world. We all had a laugh at how ridiculous our tour guide was. He basically asked us what we think we should do if President Trump were to visit Madrid and stay at the Royal Palace in the most awkward way. I can’t even recall how he phrased it but it took him several minutes for him to relay to us that he was actually joking and not trying to give us some interesting note on how foreign presidents are treated in general in Spain. He said we should put him the bosses room, lock and throw away the key. I found it hilarious that he thought this was a good joke (as did half the group).

Apparently, Madrid has bomb hot chocolate. It’s thick and you can dip churros in it. So I did at 1 AM last night with a nice chap I met on the tour named Brandon. An eccentric Italian man came in and started making lots of noises and questionable body language positions next to us. I found him quite funny and charming. He played the Clarinet really nicely too. I gave him 5 euros. He seemed like he was in his 60’s or 70’s. Feels bad man.

The South Korean guy’s alarm went off blazing this morning at 8 or 8:30 AM this morning. Shortly afterward the Brazilian guy adjacent to me got up for breakfast presumably and decided to turn the light on and start singing for 10 minutes while he packed his bag. I think my data is getting pretty damn good at this point. Other cultures don’t have a noise or light policy when others are sleeping. Animals!

Today’s my last day so I figure I’ll go to a museum or two. I’m sure it will be riveting.

I got to the Prado (famous paintings of kings and shit) and it was so nice and sunny that I decided to sit on the lawn right outside it and read for a couple of hours instead. Judge me and my fabulous tan all you like.

I had tapas with my girlfriend’s childhood friend and her boyfriend in a non-touristy area called Rosa Rosia (or something like that). Man, my girlfriend is so popular. I hope I have friends one day.

Slept a beautiful 6 hours last night (that’s about 3 hours less than I’m used to). I’ve written a lot about sleeping in hostels for this post but it cannot be understated how screwed you are if you think you’re going to sleep normally.

If you go to bed too late, you’re screwed because some animal will always be getting up at 5 AM for a flight or maybe 6 AM because he was a loser and wants to be a damn tourist all day, nice and early bird style.

No one has anything around the night before so they will spend 20 minutes purely on zipping and unzipping 3 bags as they dress themselves in a sleepy stupor (picture yourself putting pants on, zipping your bag shut, and then realizing you also need a shirt, repeat, and then you need socks, and then you want to wear that bracelet actually, etc etc).

Now, consider the other case, the loser going to bed early to avoid the early bird traffic case. You are absolutely screwed anyways. You go to bed at 10 or 11 PM and for the next 4 hours you will have someone come in or out of the room either to get ready to get drunk for the night, or they’re already drunk coming to sleep, or they need something in the middle of a drunk-infused night.

You might be wondering how I don’t add to this chaos? I pack my bag the day before and leave out only exactly what I need in the morning. Upon waking I grab it instantly and get the hell out of the sleeping vicinity and move to the bathroom area. No lights and zippers and shit.

I’ll never post about sleeping or hostel sleeping etiquette again.

Madrid was fine. I think I should have gone to Barcelona though. I didn’t really find the city interesting as a traveler. It would be swell to live there I’m sure. I also had the worst luck with my hostel roommates which is quite rare for me. It’s still nice to have visited Espana. Peace.

0 notes