#yes um the lesbians in my phone

[cheesysoup-arlo]

Like a dog pt. 1

(pt. 2)

Regina x reader angst?

Warnings: toxic Regina, slur (use of the word lesbo)

I listened to this song for most of the writing process lol

You loved Regina. You loved her so much and you would do anything for her. She was your girlfriend. She wouldn’t tell anyone that but you knew it and that was enough for you.

You’ve noticed Regina being a little more distant than usual since Cady joined the plastics. You didn’t think much of it until rumors of Aaron and Regina dating started spreading.

While hanging out at Regina’s house (with the plastics) you decided to try and bring it up. “Hey Gina, um I-“ before you could even get your words out Regina snapped “What (Y/N)” she said rolling her eyes. “You know never mind I’m probably being ridiculous” you say worried she’ll get mad “No, spit it out, Now” she demanded. “Um so I’ve been hearing rumors that you and Aaron are dating, I know us dating is a secret (only you and the plastics know) but I thought we were only seeing each other?” You say kind of rambling and nervous. “Oh my god you’re being ridiculous” Regina said annoyed “get over yourself, you’re a secret for a reason, people can’t know I’m some lesbo like you and Janis that would be gross” you suddenly felt really small and unwanted something that you weren’t used to feeling especially when you were with your girlfriend. “Yeah, right, exactly, I don’t even know why I brought it up, sorry” you mumbled out. “God you’re so insecure sometimes” Regina says leaning in to kiss you. You kiss her, the mean things she said don’t matter as much as that kiss. Kissing her soft sweet lips meant everything to you.

The next day at school you’re putting your stuff in your locker when Regina calls you over. “(Y/N) come” Regina commanded “Yes?” You say confused walking over to her, she normally doesn’t talk to you much at school. “Gretchen was right you are like a dog, you come crawling to me whenever I call” she laughs a little with her friends. “Ok bye bye puppy, see you later” she says waving you away and laughing. You go to the bathroom to cry. Why was your girlfriend being like this? Doesn’t she love you? You lost track of time while crying and missed class. You wipe your tears, trying to make yourself look presentable before your only class with Regina. When you walk into class you see Regina. You’re not as excited as you normally are but seeing her makes you a little happy even if she’s being mean to you. Regina notices you and says, “come here puppy come sit” she points to the seat next to her and of course you follow. Regina pulls you in for a kiss, she never does that in public so you were shocked. “Regina there’s people” you say worried. She rolls her eyes “just be grateful I kissed you” you decide being quiet would be the better option. Regina’s behavior confused you. “Meet me at my car during lunch” Regina whispered in your ear. You just nod. Lunch was after next period. When the bell rang you packed up your things to head to art. You bumped into someone. “Ow fuck sorry” you say picking up the stuff you dropped. “It’s ok” says a familiar voice. “Oh hi Janis” “hi (Y/N), heading to art?” “Um yeah, you know I sit like right behind you” “yeah I know but sometimes you ditch so I was just curious” Janis jokes making you laugh a little. You two walk to art together, talking a little about your recent projects. Rumors start spreading when the two openly out lesbians are seen walking together in the halls and laughing. You don’t go on your phone in art. So to your surprise when you open your phone after the bell rings for lunch and see loads of messages and post about you and Janis. And two text from Regina

Regina 💕: get your ass to my car

Regina💕: NOW

uh oh she’s angry. You run to her car. “Hey Regina” “get in the car” you do what you’re told. “So you’re cheating on me?” “WHAT NO” “oh come on (Y/N) why else would you be talking and giggling with Janis” “um maybe because I have art with her” “I don’t want to see you around her anymore” she kisses you then continues “you’re mine” you blush due to her possessiveness even if she only talked like this in private. “All yours” you say. She kisses you again. “Oh one more thing, don’t bring up Aaron anymore he’s being like so annoying and tried to kiss me” “ok” you say leaning in to kiss her again. She kisses you back kinda rough, biting your bottom lip then sticking her tongue in your mouth to assert dominance. You moan. “Oh you like that” Regina chuckles. You’re embarrassed and hide your face. She grabs you chin and makes you look at her “I want you to come over tonight after the girls leave” “ok?” You say a little confused “you’re gonna be a good little puppy and do whatever I say, ok?” You nod. “Good, now get out, I’ll see you tonight.” You leave a little confused but also excited because you get to see Regina later.

A/N: this has been in my notes app for like 3 days because I couldn’t tell if this was worth posting but here you go

[cator99]

Last year around this time I was in Chicago trying to buy shrooms off some underweight white dreads boy at addison station after trying to go to some "sapphic night" at a bar only to pull up and be told that tickets were $30 absolutely not happening I went back to my old time fav Charlie's but it was lowkey a flop wasn't feeling it at all crowd was boring as fuck not a single latino offered me coke which was how I knew it was an off night so I went back to the train. Omw back I hung out with a bunch of black dudes who were sitting on fold out lawn chairs out the back of a suv celebrating one of the dudes nephews graduating top of his class and getting a university scholarship and little dude was gay so they wanted to show their support but like since he was too young to go into the gay clubs they decided to just hang around in boystown getting wasted together and that was really fun those dudes were dope but by the time I got back to addison i was like um i came out here tonight looking 4 shrooms and will be disappointed to go back empty handed so when I saw the opportunity I took it but this white dreads californian refugee was acting wack from the start despite the fact that he also clearly was prepared to sell to me--- he started sayin I looked like a cop (normie hair, all black fit, shoes that are far too reasonable and would in hindsight be considered cop shoes to the average drifter from the west coast unaccustomed to the east coast way of life (yes I was wearing hokas), mostly sober, suspiciously in shape for someone trying to buy drugs from strangers)- I remember exactly what he said: "if you're a cop I will kill myself- no joke, straight up, I will kill myself." By the time I took out my flip phone to get his number... it was all over for me. Absolutely not happening. Please– I pleaded– I'm Canadian! "What, they don't have smartphones in Canada?" Dude I feel like cops have the budget to get normal burner phones for stings... I don't! I just want shrooms! Also worth mentioning is that there was some sort of annoying-type lesbian that had just left the sapphic party Very Disappointed By The Vibe who had been trying to hit on me prior to my asking that dude if he knows where to get shrooms since he asked to bum a smoke first and sure from her perspective I'm sure she felt as though we had been hitting it off but I'm just a friendly person and when I quickly diverted my attention away to ask some bum for drugs... she scoffed, full on scoffed. Proceeded to make a whole thing about backing away slowly and saying "I'm going to go waaayyy over here now! Good! BYE!" You're wearing cut off overalls. A tie dyed crop top. A choker. You're going back to your parents place in Evanston. I do not want to continue our conversation all the way up the red line til I get off at morse, I will kill myself- no joke, straight up, I will kill myself.

[jaydizzel2844]

Marie x Jordan Drabble

No. 6

Hanging out with Jordan is always fun, which ever form they take. André never got peoples hang up over the gender thing was, Jordan was cool either way.

But he’ll admit that they’re easier to carry back to campus drunk off their ass when they’re a girl.

Him and Luke were easily able to hold up Jordan between them and with Cate to open doors and shit getting Jordan back to their dorm room was easy.

There was one small hiccup.

“Noooo, I wanna say good night to my beautiful amazing girlfriend with the best ass ever first .” Jordan whined.

“Buddy it’s 3am, she’s asleep you can talk to her in the morning.” Luke tried to reason with them as they got to the courtyard outside side of the dorms.

“Also your obsession with her ass is a little concerning.” Andre added.

The four of them had gone clubbing. It was a last minute plan and it wasn’t meant to be an original four night out but the other three were busy. Sam had an important assignment for his puppeteering class and Marie and Emma already had plans for a roommates movie night.

Andre probably should have realised that that meant Jordan would be fourth wheeling him, Luke and Cate leading to the shapeshifter spending most of the time out at the bar doing shots with the new friends they’d made while the 3 of them were being throuple-y.

But they all had a good night regardless and hopefully Jordan won’t have too bad of a hangover tomorrow.

“No it’s not. And she might not be asleep,” Jordan slurred out. “She was having a movie night, those can go pretty late.”

The look in Jordan’s eyes was too hopeful Andre couldn’t help it.

“Alright I’ll text her.”

“Thank you, thank you thank you. I just want to say good night and that I love her.”

“Whoa what? Is the first time you’re saying the L word?” Cate exclaimed, stopping the 4 of them from going any further.

“Lesbians?” Jordan asked, confused.

“No, love.” Luke explained “fuck you are way too drunk.”

“Oh sorry, yes I love her but I haven’t told her yet. I’m going to do it tonight.” Jordan looked so proud of themselves.

“No you are not,” Cate told them firmly. “Not when you’re too drunk to stand up on your own.”

“But..”

“She’s right dude,” Andre interrupted. “You got to make shit like that romantic, like recreate your first date or something.”

“I should recreate getting shitfaced at Dusty’s?”

“No,” Luke said with a laugh. “The dinner you two went out for the week after that. At the Korean place off campus. Or do something else romantic. Basically do tell her but not tonight.”

“Ok, can I still tell her good night?” Jordan’s big brown eyes were impossible to say no to.

“If she’s up.” Andre said pulling out his phone.

—

To Marie🩸

U up?

Jordan wants to say good night

From Marie🩸

Yeah ?

Are they ok?

To Marie🩸

Yep just drunk

We’ll swing by your room in 5

From Marie🩸

Cool

Actually I’ll met you at their room

Don’t want to wake Emma

—-

“When did you know you loved her?” Cate asked as they entered the dorm building and headed for the elevator. Getting Jordan to their room was going a lot quicker now that they knew Marie was waiting for them there.

“Um, she was giving me a blowjob..”

“How romantic.” Cate interrupted.

“Fuck off, anyway I switched during it by accident. I thought I majorly fucked up, like totally freaked her out but I didn’t. She just kept going. And I just knew then and there that she wanted all of me, exactly as I am and she makes me feel so happy and good about myself and I’ve never been in love before but I’m pretty sure that this is it.”

“Ok that’s a bit romantic.” Cate admits at they got out of the elevator on Jordan’s floor.

“Thank you.”

Marie was waiting for them at Jordan’s doom in slippers and a hoodie that Cate is pretty sure belongs to Jordan over her pyjamas.

Once Jordan saw her they slipped out of Luke and Andre’s arms and staggered into Marie’s.

“You got it from here or do you need help getting them into bed?” Luke asked.

“No I got it, thanks.” Marie said as she opened the dorm room door while Jordan nuzzled into her neck. “Goodnight”

***

Drunk Jordan was compliant if a bit cuddly so getting them into their pyjamas and into bed wasn’t too difficult.

“Sorry I didn’t come out tonight, it looks like you had a lot of fun.” Marie said as she helped Jordan sit on the bed so she could untie their shoes.

“Nah, it’s cool. You have fun with Emma?”

“Yep, we watched mean girls and a few other classics that’s she was horrified that I hadn’t seen yet. You?”

“Yep, it was so fun. So many shots, maybe too many.” Jordan got up and wrapped their arms around Marie, one hand sliding down to her ass before stopping. “Do you mind that I do that?”

“What?” Pulling out of Jordan’s arms so she could take their shirt off and replace it with a pyjama top.

“Me putting my hands on your ass, like you’ve joked about it a few times and Andre says I’m obsessed but does it bother you?” Jordan looked so concerned as Marie was undoing their belt.

She smiled to herself. “I don’t mind it, kind of like it to be honest.”

“Really?” They asked with so much relief and hope on their face that Marie couldn’t help but kiss them before getting back to taking their jeans off.

“Yeah, I’m been pretty unwanted all my life but I’m never insecure about you wanting me because you make it so obvious that you do, through ass grabbing.” Marie said with a laugh “you also make it clear that you enjoy spending time with me and are an all round amazing partner. Plus I know I have a great ass, I’d be offended if you didn’t appreciate it.”

Once Jordan was in their bed Marie pulled off her hoodie and slippers and joined them.

“It was really cool to hang out with they guys, even if I was fourth wheeling.” Jordan said cuddling into her side. “They give good advice.”

“Like what?” Marie asked as she started to doze off.

“They said not to tell you that I love you when I’m drunk. I’m gonna do it over dinner, make it romantic.”

Marie was suddenly wide awake while Jordan was out like a light. She just about managed to stop her self from jumping for joy or something equally as embarrassing and likely to wake up her partner.

‘Jordan loves me,’ she thought to herself self as she closed her eyes to go to sleep. ‘And I love them too.’

[ddlcpoly]

how Yuri and natsuki end up together?

*Natsuki is rummaging through the clubroom closet*

Natsuki: Fuck.

*Yuri noticing that Natsuki is having problems decides to check up on her*

Yuri: Um, Natsuki, what seems to be the issue?

*Natsuki turns towards her*

Natsuki: Oh, ugh, it's just that I can't find my copy of the first volume of Ouran Host Club.

Yuri: Is it the manga that a character in a pink suit and a bouquet of flowers for a cover?

Natsuki, confused: Uh, yeah, why?

Yuri: Didn't Sayori borrow it?

Natsuki: Oh, shit, yeah. I forgot. How come you know?

Yuri: Oh, uh, well you gave it to her a few days ago in front of everyone.

Natsuki: Oh yeah, I forget that you always see everything.

Yuri: O-Oh I'm sorry I didn't mean to intrude.

Natsuki: Wa-Wait, wait no. I didn't mean it like that, yo-you're just attentive. I guess.

Yuri: O-Oh, really?

Natsuki: Yeah. Sure. Like, I’m not good at the whole complementing thing, but yeah, I’ve seen how good you are at paying attention to stuff.

Yuri: O-Oh, thanks.

*A small awkward silence fills the closet they're in*

Natsuki: So um. Can I ask you something?

Yuri: Sure. What is it?

Natsuki, her face turning increasingly red: So like, um, we've been friends and stuff and like, you like girls and I also like girls, so, um, would you- uh.

*She looks up at her, Yuri looks surprised*

Natsuki: N-NEVERMIND! I'M GOING NOW.

*Natsuki adverts her eyes away from Yuri and starts speed walking towards the door*

Yuri: W-Wait. I-I uh, you. Can I? Uhhh. Pl-Please can I? J-Just wait a bit.

*Yuri grabs hold of her sleeve*

Yuri: I-I think I know what you were about to say? So you can just say, please.

Natsuki: Y-You knew?

Yuri: Wait, no I.

Natsuki: Wh-Why do you want me to say it outloud? So you can reject me?

*Natsuki's eyes start to water*

Natsuki: Are you going to make fun of the raging lesbian that couldn't keep it in her pants?Is that's it? Or is it that you want me to stroke your ego by saying the shit that I find so hot and amazing about you, is that wh-

*Yuri leans in towards her and plants a kiss right on her lips, a quick and nervous peck, one that both girls felt it lasted forever and yet ended way too early*

Natsuki: I-uh, What?

Yuri: I-I-I like you Natsuki, a-a lot. S-So could we go out? Please?

Natsuki, blushing furiously: I-UH, WHAT?

Yuri: It’s uh, I do mean this, I-I know that you have had issues with trusting people and I-I know that sometimes people are assholes that say things without meaning them, but please believe me when I say that there is nothing I am more certain about than my desire to go out with you. So please, c-c-could we?

Natsuki: YES!

*Yuri takes a tiny step back, startled*

Natsuki: I-I mean, um, s-sure, I think i-it’s worth a shot.

Yuri: …

Yuri: Ahahahaha.

*Yuri starts laughing uncontrollably. Natsuki looks at her with concern and worry.*

Yuri: Aha, I am, ahaha, I am sorry. It’s just that you are really cute, Natsuki.

Natsuki: Wha-what!? D-Don’t say that.

*Yuri calms down from her laughing fit and smiles lovingly at Natsuki*

Yuri: Um, sorry, I don’t know what came over me.

*A default phone notification sound comes from Yuri’s backpack.*

Yuri: Oh, sorry, it’s probably one of my moms.

*She quickly glances at her phone after taking it out of her backpack*

Yuri: Oh, it’s really late, I need to get going if I want to make it for dinner. I’m sorry I can’t stay, but I’ll see you tomorrow?

Natsuki, with her phone in her hand: Shit yeah, it’s late, my dad probably won’t like it if I take any longer.

*As they both get ready to leave, Natsuki gets an idea*

Natsuki: So, uh-

*She yanks Yuri by the collar swiftly lands a kiss on Yuri’s lips, savouring the moment now that she wasn’t caught off-guard and starts running towards the hallway*

Natsuki: See you tomorrow bae!

*Yuri looks on at where she once was in stunned delight*

[honeytama]

coming out as bisexual + pride fest headcanons 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

noah sebastian/bad omens x gender neutral! reader

a/n: *ty to @hedonists for the pic and @exitwoundsx & @somewhere-diamond for the ideas. also, if someone wants to write more on this please do. i'm gonna be feral all month long.

content: fluff and a lil bit of bi anxiety

coming out as bisexual

noah and yourself have been together for a few months

the beginning of your relationship felt like a honeymoon, but lately you’ve felt somewhat closed off and anxious

there was tension between you two up until having your first argument

the argument was about something silly, really, it could be fixed with just a bit more communication

but once you've made up, you take the chance of demonstrating your trust in him and your need to share your feelings by coming out to him, finally

“oh, you’re bi?,” his eyebrows raise. “is that why you’ve been acting weird? you wanted to tell me?” he smiles.

you confirm that’s why and tell him you didn’t want to hide that side of your life from him anymore. you felt better having opened up to him, but you didn't want him to think any differently of you.

“i understand. you're still, Y/N, to me..." he pauses. "um, what does being bi mean for you?” he asks, curious.

you explain what it means to you and explain that you still love him no matter your attraction to another gender.

“you love me, Y/N?” he smiles, wide. he looks like he’s won the lottery.

you say yes, begrudgingly. knowing he’ll tease you about it for the next week.

“i love you, too,” he takes his hand in yours. “thank you for telling me. i love everything about you, just so you know. your sexuality doesn't change who you are or how I feel about you. i'm proud of you for being honest with me, and for being true to yourself.”

a weight falls right off your shoulders and you finally feel like you can breathe.

"i'm here for you always."

going to pride fest with bad omens

with pride month coming around the corner, you get brave and ask your friends to come with you to pride fest in that city this weekend

of course, you say “if you don’t want to go, it’s totally okay” or “sorry, I’m just really excited.”

but noah assures you not to apologize. “yeah, that would be fun. we’d love to go with you. you’ll just have to show us the ropes,” you hear noah laugh over the phone.

june rolls around and you're at your place with your friends from bad omens getting ready to head out to the festival in the afternoon

folio brought his own kaleidoscope glasses and will choose to wear iridescent glitter on his shoulders and cheeks. he opts to apply it himself.

jolly decides he wants his hair in braids after hearing how hot it will be, so noah and you help him braid his hair into pigtails. he chooses from one of the pride tees you have in your closet. maybe "be gay, do crime"

nicky is super jealous of folio's glasses, but he distracts himself by letting you paint on his arms different pride flags. he makes a joke about him being the one being tattooed this time. his shirt says, "lesbians eat what?!"

noah really wants to go shirtless.

you don't allow him to, knowing he'll burn and regret it in the morning.

so he opts to wear a classic white tank. nicholas and you team up to give noah a glitter middle part in his hair.

the fest ends up being a blast and you feel so supported by your friends

they all follow around like ducks and ask you questions when they're curious

their favorite parts are the parade and the drag queen performances

you even had them stop at an atm before the fest to get some cash to tip the queens

AHHHH my heart

[blue-babygirl]

Would you, possibly, be willing to do Emily comforting a lesbian BAU!reader who’s just been dumped by their gf? 👀 I just think she would be so sweet about it but also so real

A/N: Okay so I'm pretty sure I went off the rails from what the anon actually asked for and just fucked it up but um.... I'll just post it now.

Status Update

Pairing: Emily Prentiss x BAU!Fem!Reader

Type: Fluff/Sweet (I think?)

Description: Break ups can suck. But you have your best friend (and hopefully future girlfriend) to help you out and spend the evening with you.

Warnings: The reader doesn’t seem all that affected by the break up tbh? I don’t think there is anything I need to add here.

You knew that you needed to figure out a way to apologize to your girlfriend. So that’s what you did on the jet back home. By the time the jet landed, you had a plan in motion. You made a reservation at a restaurant she was talking about and ordered her favorite flowers and some chocolates. The only hitch in your plan was that you couldn’t get ahold of your girlfriend.

Well, ex-girlfriend after the call you get.

“Hey Gar-”

“OMG Y/N! Why didn’t you say anything? When did this happen? You just have to say a word and I will be at your place with ice cream and alcohol and movies!”

“Woah woah woah! What’s this about?” Emily turned to you from the passenger seat as you gave her and your phone a strange look.

“Emily! Good thing you guys are together! And Y/N didn’t tell you? She and Clarise broke up!”

“What?!?” You and Emily exclaimed at the same time.

“What? She updated her relationship status on Facebook… OMG she did it without telling you…” You could quite literally hear the grimace on Penny’s face across the phone.

“No… I- I’ve been trying to get ahold of her since the case ended but it keeps going to voicemail…”

“Oh Y/N… I am so sorry. You know we are here for you, right?” Emily gave you a soft smile as you took a deep breath to try and think clearly.

“Yes! And um… not sure if you want to know but she blocked you… that’s why it kept going to voicemail…” Penelope spoke up, making you shake your head. “Thanks Penny. I’ll see you at the office.”

“Okay. I love you, be safe lovies.” You sat back with a sigh, not sure if it was disbelief, sadness or relief that you felt. You couldn’t believe that this was how Clarise was breaking up with you but at the same time, it was also how she and her friends let people know that they didn’t like them or were mad at them. You felt sad that this is how things were ending after being with her and there for her for the last almost two years. And however bad it might be, you also felt somewhat relieved after how much she had been trying to make you choose between your job and her even though you had made it clear what your job was like and how much you loved it before you even got together.

“You know we are here for you right?” You glanced at Emily, catching her eye. You sigh, contemplating if you should speak out your thoughts.

“I know… Honestly, I don’t really know how to feel. We were together for two years and instead of giving me the courtesy of telling me herself, she just blocked me and changed her status, which honestly hurts. But at the same time, she has been pretty insistent about me choosing her over my job over the past couple months, so this is somewhat of a relief too because I don’t want to choose.”

“I feel you. Most of us seem to have the same issue.” Emily chuckled, but you could feel the bitterness of it. You groan when you remember that you need to cancel your reservations and the orders, knowing that you won’t get your money back.

“I’m gonna have to cancel my reservations and stuff and I’m not even going to get my money back. This sucks.” You take out your phone just as Emily speaks up.

“Well… you can still go? I mean, by yourself or we can go as a group if you want?” “You know what?” You speak up after a moment of silence. “I don’t want to go alone, and the reservation is only for two people. How do you feel about going with me?”

“Like a date?” Emily exclaims and you can hear the surprise in her voice.

“Well… not exactly… but we can do that after I move on from everything with Clarise?” You bite your lip as you shoot your shot.

“Well… a-are you sure?”

You shoot Emily a soft smile as she glances at you, “A 100% sure.”

“I would love that…” You can see Emily blushing under the streetlight as she parks outside your apartment building.

“Perfect. I’ll pick you up in an hour?” You smile at her as she nods, grinning at the blush covering her cheeks. “Emily Prentiss blushing? Never thought I’d see the day.”

“Oh hush! If anybody ever hears about this…” Emily threatens. “No one is going to hear. Your secret’s safe with me Em. Now, I’m gonna go get ready and by the time I get to your place, you better be dressed up Agent Prentiss.” You grin as you tease her, getting your bags and leaving the car.

One hour later, you are standing outside Emily’s apartment building with flowers and a box of chocolate, waiting for Emily to get down. You grin when you see her coming out in a beautiful red dress that doesn’t even compare to the beauty wearing it.

Emily smiles at you as you exchange greetings, blushing when you give her the flowers and chocolate.

“These aren’t the ones you ordered on the jet.” Emily says as she gets into the car.

“No, they are in the trash. I was not about to give you the flowers I bought for Clarise, Em. You deserve a lot better.” You start the car, giving her one last smile before starting to drive.

The rest of the evening is a blur of conversation, laughter and memories being made. You both enjoy a selection of high-quality food followed by an ice cream stop before driving to drop her off at her apartment.

As the night comes to an end, you are sure of two things. One, the two of you won’t be dating until after at least 3 months because according to Emily ‘that is the required amount of time to get someone out of your system’. Two, you are willing to wait an eternity if it means that you can date Emily at the end.

[wordpress-blaze-240355128]

The ROI on LOL's: How Humor Closes More Deals

Humor sells… or at least it helps. But why is that? I dug deeper than a dog after a bone so you don’t have to. Here’s the science-backed truth about why laughter is a strategic advantage in sales and in business interactions. Let’s think about selling at a neuro-chemical level. Before you ask if I’ve lost my marbles – stay with me a moment. When someone laughs, you’re not just getting a reaction.. you’re sort of hacking their brain’s reward system. Here’s what I mean. When we laugh, the brain releases three key neurotransmitters:

Dopamine: Boosts focus, motivation and memory retention.

Oxytocin: The “trust hormone” that builds social bonds.

Endorphins: Natural stress relievers that create a sense of ease.

From a sales perspective, a happy, relaxed prospect is generally less skeptical, more engaged, and can even be more receptive to new ideas. I'll take a dozen please! Kidding aside - ever had a call or meeting where one well placed joke broke the ice in the best of ways? That’s oxytocin in action. Building instant, incremental trust without selling them anything. Now let’s go back to the dopamine for a second – increased memory retention. When you mix in humor, your message isn’t just more likely to be heard.. it’s remembered. Gatekeepers for example. Making them laugh might just be the difference between them remembering why you called or tossing your name in the ever-dreaded “back-burner” pile. See ya next year! Not convinced yet? Neuroscientists at Stanford found that laughter reduces activation in the part of the brain responsible for fear and risk assessment (amygdala). What’s that mean? It means humor, when done properly and professionally, will go so far as to lower a buyer’s anxiety around decision making. Beyond that, it encourages quicker, more intuitive choices and disrupts negative thought patterns. Would anyone be mad about closing deals faster? Didn't think so! Trust accelerates deals, and humor builds trust faster than you can say, “sign here, press hard, third copy’s yours.”

Be calculated and use sparingly! Now before you break out the finest one-liners you read on some corner of the internet, recognize this truth. It’s not about telling jokes. It’s about making human connections with timing and authenticity. Don’t be “that guy” (or gal!) who goes off the rails with something edgy. Instead, think of humor as one tactical tool you have that signals confidence and builds rapport. A True Story: How Humor Won a Negotiation One of the toughest negotiations I ever had wasn’t in a boardroom or a Zoom meeting – it was with my property manager. The rent was going up – by $120 a month. GULP. Fresh off the heels of a Negotiations course, I walked in ready to test my skills.

Step 1: Kindness. Smiles. Handshakes. I requested no increase. She didn’t budge.

Step 2: Logic. Direct. Cited market conditions. Still nothing.

Step 3: Boiling Point. “We’ve been perfect tenants.” She replied, “That’s what you agreed to do.”

I was stuck. I’d tried it all.. or so I thought. Then, she asked my name. “Shaw” I said. She looked in her system and chuckled. “Oh wow. You’re the first Shaw in our system since we opened in the early 1970s!” “You’re kidding! That’s got to be worth at least $120!” She burst out laughing. “That’s the best one I’ve ever heard. I’ll tell you what.. I'll waive your increase as a one-time courtesy this year only.” Hadn’t learned that one in Negotiations! Humor sells. So, what’s the ROI on LOL’s? If you want to close more, don’t just pitch people your best one-liners – connect with your buyers. Make them laugh and they’ll not only listen to and trust you more.. they’ll remember why. It's amazing what science-backed information can tell us about things we wouldn't normally related it to. Next week, we’re keeping the scientific momentum going as we dissect the sales methodologies baked into Go-To-Market strategies. We're on a mission not just to identify what works.. but (say it with me now) WHY. Stay tuned! Find this useful? Share it with someone who could use the help. I provide sales coaching and training for professionals and organizations that want to scale revenue without sacrificing ethics. If that sounds like something you need, let’s talk.

Next Issue: The Science Behind Sales: Decoding GTM Strategies

Source: The ROI on LOL's: How Humor Closes More Deals

[mikegraves]

MakeDamnSure

Mikegraves post-breakup reconciliation, inspired slightly by MakeDamnSure by Taking Back Sunday!

CWs: two assholes trying to manipulate each other, referenced alcoholism

Your name is Mikey Loveless and you are way too sober for this. A text on your phone from DO NOT ANSWER!!! reads come outside. You do not want to go outside, but you know he’ll just keep texting and calling until he gets his way. 

You’re not exactly presentable, considering it’s nearly midnight, but you don’t care. You don’t owe him anything. With a reluctant sigh, you extract yourself from the couch and go open the door. 

He looks the same as always–perfectly gelled hair, perfectly clean glasses, perfectly practiced frown. A suit jacket over a t-shirt, because he’s just soooo cool. You hate him.

“Michael.” He says, his expression a perfect mask of neutrality.

“Gideon.” You reply. You hate when people use your full name, and he knows. Asshole. “Care to explain what you’re doing here?”

“How about you let me in first?” He looks past you into your apartment, and you can already hear the judgemental bullshit he’s going to say.

“How about I don’t?”

“Yeah, I wasn’t really asking.” He walks past you, bumping your shoulder and making himself at home on your couch. “You look like shit.”

You want to punch him. 

“Get to the point.” You say.

“Hm.” He seems to consider you for a moment, then shrugs. “Okay. We’re getting back together.”

You snort and roll your eyes. “Uh, no, we aren’t.”

“Stop arguing, I’ve already made up my mind.” He snaps. “You’re lucky I’m generous enough to forgive you.”

“Forgive me?” You exclaim. “I’m great, you’re the one who sucks!”

“You left, Mike.” He hisses. “And I’ve found it within myself to look past that and take you back.”

“Until you get back with Ramona, right?” You regret it the instant you say it.

“Obviously.” He says, as though it’s completely reasonable. “That’s always been the arrangement. You never had a problem with it before.”

Yes, I did, says a tiny, annoying voice in your head. You push it down.

“You’re not worth my time.” You scoff. “I’d much rather be with a cute girl than you.”

“Oh, please, girls don’t even look at you.” He says, eyes sharp. “I’m the best you’re ever gonna get.”

“You think you’re sooo much better than me, huh?” God, you wish you were drunk.

“Baby,” he raises a condescending eyebrow. “I am better than you. I’m Gideon Graves. You’re lucky I ever let you call yourself my boyfriend.”

Baby. Who is he to call you pet names?

“Oh, wow, you’re Gideon Graves!” You give him an overexaggerated grin. “You’re sooo right, I can’t believe I ever thought I was above dating a washed up business major who’s still hung up on his ex-girlfriend!”

“I am not washed up.” He hisses. “I’m up-and-coming. And Ramona is my muse”

His muse. He’s so pretentious. 

“Riiiight.” You roll your eyes. “So, what do you need me for, again?”

“I don’t need you.” He stands up from the couch. “You’re just an easy way to pass the time. You’re replaceable. Easily replaceable.”

“Then replace me.” You say as he walks towards you, crossing your arms. “Just find some desperate college chick or whatever. You’re rich enough. It wouldn’t be hard.”

“Yeah, but it’s so much easier to just use you.” He says. “I already know your insecurities and weaknesses. You’ve already got the Glow in you. Half the work is already done for me.” He gestures to your head, which, annoyingly, is starting to get warm. 

“God, you’re such a psycho.” You snap. “Who the hell dates someone just to amplify their insecurities?”

“Oh, like you’re so noble.” He hisses, pointing a finger at your chest. “You only slept with me for the money, and ‘cause you thought it’d get you closer to Lynette Guycott. Who’s a lesbian, by the way.”

“Um, obviously that’s the only reason I slept with you!” You exclaim. “What else do you have going for you? You’re not exactly a catch!”

“And you are?” He says. “You’re an alcoholic college dropout with no license who can’t even play bass right.”

“Then why’d you even go out with me in the first place?” You ask, fists clenched. You didn’t want to get worked up like this, he’s not worth the energy, but you’ve never been good at controlling your emotions. “Surely the amazing Gideon Graves can find someone better!”

“Because– I told you!” He huffs, uncharacteristically stumbling on his words. “Because I needed someone to keep the bed warm while I worked on getting Ramona back!”

“Why me, though? Huh?” You keep pressing. “That could’ve been anyone.”

“Cause– well, you were so fucking desperate at that party!” He snaps. You like seeing him lose his composure a little. He’s usually so unaffected, so distant. It’s nice to see him squirm. “Oh, Gideon, please help my shitty band get popular! I wanna be a star soooo bad, I’ll do anything! Even though I can’t play or sing, make us famous anyway!”

You bristle at his impression of you. “I don’t sound like that.”

“You totally do.” He smiles, that mean little smile that you hate. “At the time, at least. You were pretty drunk, if I recall correctly, though I guess that’s pretty normal for you, huh?”

You flinch as he mentions your issues with alcohol. It’s a sore subject for you, and you feel your head heat up with glow. For a moment, you think you see a twinge of guilt in his eyes, but it’s gone as soon as you notice it.

“I– I’m working on that.” You mutter. “And I wasn’t desperate. I just knew I could squeeze you for cash if I played my cards right, which I did.”

“Well, aren’t you a charming little gold digger.” He sneers. “You were such a mistake.”

“Yeah?” Your voice cracks a little, which is probably the worst thing it could do. “Then leave me alone. Get out of my apartment.”

He pauses, seemingly trying to run the numbers on the interaction. “...No. I’m not leaving until you come back with me.”

“Why? Why, huh?” Your voice raises as you grow more and more emotional. “You don’t fucking care about me! You never did! I’m just a distraction to you!”

“Is that such a problem?” He asks, voice raising to match yours. “You don’t care about me either, what do you care if I’m using you, huh?”

“Because I want more!” You blurt out, eyes stinging slightly. 

There’s a few beats of silence. Your stomach sinks. You didn’t want to admit that, not even to yourself, much less to him. 

“You do?” He finally asks, voice quiet.

“No.” You mutter quickly. “I want more than you. A… a girlfriend, or something. Not you.”

He looks at you for a moment, not with any malice, not with any joy, just with a studious curiosity. Your head is glowing so badly that you can see the light being cast on your shoulders. He closes his eyes for a moment, then sighs.

“Mike, I need you.” He says quietly.

“No, you don’t.” You say quickly. “You’re lying. You’re just trying to get me to forgive you.”

“Can you not be a bitch for once?” He snaps, then rubs his eyes. “Sorry. God, whatever.” 

You don’t know if you’ve ever heard him give you an actual, non-manipulative apology before. You don’t quite know how to feel.

“I’m just saying.” You mumble. “You lie all the time…”

“Yeah, I do.” He says, narrowing his eyes. “So you should be able to recognize it by now.”

I meet his eyes, glaring. He’s right, by now I know what he sounds like when he lies. He doesn’t sound like that right now. It’s almost worse.

“Can you just… come back?” He sighs, and you notice the dark circles under his eyes for the first time.

“I don’t… I don’t know, Gideon…” You mutter. “You’re just gonna push me aside for–”

“Ramona’s not coming back.” He cuts you off. “She never will.”

You pause. “Well, yeah…” You knew that was true, but you didn’t think he’d accepted it yet. 

“So come back.” He sighs. “Just… come back, Mike.”

“Say that you love me.” You blurt.

He blinks at you in surprise. “...What?”

“Say that you love me.” You say, crossing your arms. You’ve already said it, you might as well stick to it.

“What? No.” He frowns. 

“Then I’m not coming back.” What the hell are you doing?

“Baby, you can’t be serious.” He chuckles awkwardly. “I mean, you wouldn’t say that about me.”

You pause. You wouldn’t have, not a minute ago.

“...I love you, Gideon Graves.” You say quietly, the glow on your arms dimming slightly. “Now say it back, or we’re over.”

“...Mike…” He looks shocked. “That’s–”

“Say it.” Your voice cracks, and, fuck, you are not going to start crying.

He stares at you for a moment, then something within him crumbles. 

“I love you, Mike.” He admits. “...There, are you happy now?”

You look up and meet his eyes, and instantly your tears spill over. You didn’t think he’d actually say it.

“Wh– you wanted me to say that, stop–” He holds his hands up in a panic. “Stop crying–”

“I’m happy, you stupid asshole.” You sniffle, then pull him into a tight hug.

“You’re… getting tears on my jacket, baby…” He mumbles, awkwardly patting your back.

“I don’t give a shit.” You sniffle into his shoulder. “You suck. I hate you.”

“No, you don’t.” He says softly.

“Yes, I do.” You insist. “...I just also happen to love you. I guess.”

He smiles, the first genuine smile he’s had all night. “...So you’ll come back?”

“...Yeah,” You admit. “I guess I will.”

[technikki]

unmmmnm my phone doesnt have the flame emoji for some reason but. Give me yuor Emma takes <3

YAAAAY EEMA MY FRIEND lets see um. well honestly i dont think nearly enough people making postcanon designs acknowledge that emma is absolutely gnc in some form.

yes she really doesn't dress super masc and i know how annoying the trend of 'oh shes so butch <3<3<3' n its literally just Girl With Pants can be but i think in the context of tpn specifically its like. different. i simply think that demizu taking a character who was required to wear skirts 'because shes a girl' for the first 11 years of her life and making the conscious decision to literally never draw her in a skirt outside gracefield probably has some significance to it yknow.

and like all the girls are shown wearing both skirts and pants at some point once they are given the freedom to choose, but emma is the only girl besides violet and paula who makes the conscious decision to never wear skirts. basicaly agender masc lesbian emma is the realest ever to me <3

[existance-stories]

a small piece of my lesbian story:

hey, so the last 3 years ive been working on a story between two girls in a Dutch secondary school bit by bit and i wanted to share a small piece of it here:

feedback would be greatly appreciated!

Main character's name: Ella, 15 (F, 1m 63) Her partner: Evie, 16 (F, 1m 70)

================================================

A few minutes later the bell rings and the teacher says:

“Alright ladies and gentlemen, good morning! Please put your bags on the ground, I’d like to actually see your faces after you’ve been hidden behind a turned off camera for so long. I know it’s been a hard time for all of us having to sit at home, but I’m glad to see you’re all here… except... for Avery it seems... Well that’s fine, she’s probably still asleep…”

“Mr. Wolters, I don’t know or you know, but Avery prefers they/them pronouns...” someone says through the classroom. A few people laugh at the correction.

“Oh yes, sorry, they are still asleep…”

“Actually, I speak to Avery every now and then, and they told me that they were sick today… And that they have to look out for their grandma…” Evie says.

“Right, I’ll put her- uh, them on sick in the system, then. Well anyway, let’s pick up where we…” I try to focus on what he’s saying, but besides me I hear whispering:

“psst, Ella… Is it me or is everyone here more tired than before the lockdown? Do you think people are happy to be back at school, or did they prefer the online lessons?”

“That’s a good question actually... Personally I’m happier to have live lessons... But... I can’t exactly mind-read now, can I?” to which Evie laughs quietly, trying not to catch attention from the teacher.

“Evie and Ella, please be quiet will you? Otherwise I’m afraid I’ll have to pull you two apart again. And I don’t think you’d like that.”

Evie says “Yes, sorry sir! It won’t happen again!” whilst holding my arm, holding in her laughter and looking at me.

We remain silent for the remainder of the lesson where the teacher explains some boring stuff about salts, until the teacher tells us to do a set of assignments for next class. As usual, the entire class starts talking as soon as the Mr. Wolters is done speaking.

“Ella, this is so boring, isn’t it? Why couldn’t they just stick to online lessons…” Evie asks me in a bored tone.

“Yep. Well, it’ll just be a manner of getting used to it, I assume... Anyway, do you have plans for after school today? We could... y’know... hang out together…?”

“Oh Ella, I’d love that! Should we meet in front of the building when we’re both done with school?”

“Sure! That seems like an excellent idea!” Evie suddenly pets my hand for a split second, before the bell interrupts her. “Well, looks like the lesson’s over…”

“Ladies and gentlemen, don’t forget what I said, exercise 13 to 16 for next time! See you all next class!” Mr. Wolters exclaims through the classroom.

“Sure.. Like we’ll forget.” Evie quietly jokes. I giggle, thinking it’s pretty relatable, right before leaving the classroom. “What lesson do we have now?” she asks me.

“Um..” – I say, getting my phone – “physics, it looks like.” I also see one missed message from mom, saying: ‘Thanks hun! Dad and I won’t be home tonight, there’s food in the fridge if you need it.’ I decide to not respond to it for now, since it probably won’t be important. I walk to the classroom.

“Oh cool, that means we’ll be able to address our… um... situation to Mr. Martens. He’s our mentor too after all.”

“Yeah, I’d actually like to have someone to talk to who we both trust.”

================================================

again, any feedback would be greatly appreciated!

[motocorsas]

Trick-or-treat

cw: NSFW

"Tony. Tony."

"Mmh? What?"

"It's an emergency."

Fabio's standing over him in the same clothes he was wearing a few hours ago; they've made a habit of hanging out at either's home, playing video games for however long and laughing about stupid shit and inevitably getting drunk or falling asleep of pure exhaustion. Tony notices that his position on Fabio's couch has shifted a little since he was awake last, but more than that, he notices that Fabio is freaking out.

"I need you to believe what I'm about to say," Fabio urges. He's almost shaking.

"Okay,"

"I… God, it's really, really fucked up."

"Just say it, bro."

"Are you sure you're gonna be okay?"

"Yes, I'm sure, now fucking say it, man,"

"I have a vagina."

Unexpected, for sure. Either Fabio is a really, really good liar, the kind that Tony knows he isn't, or this is serious.

"Oh my god, I -- forget I said anything. This was stupid. I'm… I'm going back to bed,"

"What? No, come on. Talk to me."

"Okay, but don't stare at me."

--

They end up, of course, phoning Jorge. Tony tries not to think about what it's going to be like, training with him in a few weeks, when this is all over. If it's ever over.

"So we called Marc who said to call Dani but neither of us have his number so I called you so we could talk to him."

"Wow. Courteous."

"Can we please just talk to him?"

"Could you tell me what it's about first?"

"Oh my god."

"Why are you keeping secrets from me if you're about to tell my husband?"

"You… Fabio is having a, um, problem. Health problem. Very unexpected."

"Okay, you know what, I don't need to know more. Tell Dani,"

The phone is passed and a different Spanish lilt answers. "What is it?"

"Hi, it's Tony and Fabio, you already know that. Fabio… uh, he woke up with, uh, different… he has a vagina."

"Did this happen just now?"

"Yes. What do we do?"

"Well, don't panic," pretty hard not to, "it's manageable. Stress, hormone imbalance, certain vitamins, minerals. More iron and magnesium."

"Are you serious? Is there anything we can do to… speed up the process?"

"Well, certain kinds of physical activity work the best,"

"Like what?"

"Sex. Actually, that's probably the quickest way, but I didn't think you'd like to…"

"Yeah, not really interested in fucking my best friend."

"If you want, try other kinds of high-intensity cardio, but results can be … unreliable. Doesn't activate the same neural pathways or release the same chemicals."

"How the fuck do you know all this?"

--

"Happened to me, obviously. I was around your age."

They hang up after that.

"Do you know any lesbians?"

"Well, yes, but I'm not sure Ana is going to drop everything and show up here. And most lesbians aren't into… you."

"Oof, my poor ego. Any bi girls?"

"Not personally. You wanna try, like, Tinder or something?"

"Jesus, no, I can't go on a date right now! Fuck, we… I really shouldn't be trusting strangers with this. If this gets out,"

"Would be bad."

"Yeah, really."

A long and strange silence. Fabio shifts in his seat and Tony realizes something.

"Would it be better if I do it?"

"W-what do you mean?"

"Like, bro, you can trust me. I know you, I've seen you way worse than this."

"No, you haven't."

"What about when you broke your leg?"

"Okay, maybe."

"Um."

--

"Tony, you -- you don't have to kiss me,"

"But I want to,"

"You are good. Better than I expected."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

--

"If I didn't know better, I'd think you were hard for me right now."

"All for you, big boy."

"Stop trying to fluster me, man, it's not gonna work."

"Then stop trying to make jokes, it doesn't make this any less hot."

--

Tony can feel how wet Fabio is through his boxers. "God, have you been like this the whole time?"

"Yeah," Fabio breathes, "since I woke up. It f-feels… weird. Not like a boner," He half-chokes awkwardly through the last sentence, attempting a laugh and achieving something more like a hoarse moan.

"I can imagine," Tony says, looking down now not to avoid eye contact but to focus on removing Fabio's underwear.

--

"D-do you think that's it?" Fabio exhales, still panting high in his chest.

"I don't know. I mean, it's obviously not changing right now," Tony replies, leaning back and wiping his mouth, breathing just as hard.

"Did Dani say how many--"

"I don't know, I didn't ask,"

"Did you think just one would be enough," Fabio purrs, "or did you not ask him so that you could go as many rounds as you want?" He plays up the joking tone but Tony can see him still quivering. He pulls him in for a long kiss, still a little strange, with his hands clasped oddly around his forearms.

"What do you want?" Fabio nearly whispers.

"I want to fuck you,"

"Me?"

"God, Fabio, if you're not gay then please stop getting my hopes up."

"Look, in any other situation, I wouldn't. I just," … "feel so, I don't know. I feel good,"

[i-miss-breathing]

📷 the picture I took of the recent solar eclipse

🍫 nooooo you can’t do this to me 😭😭😭

✨ nicknames I’d like to have are mango and munch because they were runner ups for my name, but unfortunately I am not out to people so I’ve only told 2 people my name and 0 people my desired nicknames irl 😔

🎵 under a technicolor sky by Will Wood :)

✏️ yes and I will write more once I have the time energy and ambition at the same time. Unless prompts count as half points, in which case I’ve been writing a little bit of fan fiction here and there

😏 not anymore, I ran out of space on my phone and I’m trying to find a good used laptop for sale within my small budget

💛 yes, just earlobe piercings right now but I’m hoping to get a Medusa piercing, snake bites, a bridge, an industrial piercing, a daith piercing + a Tragus piercing because i hear they can help with migraines and they look cool, I’m sure there are more that I want but those are the big ones

🐰 ooooo this is such a tough question. Umm probably how they view other people? Not necessarily how they act towards them because assholes can and do disguise themselves and nice people can seem like assholes for many different reasons. Not just intention either though because you know, path to hell is paved with good intentions and all. I don’t really know how to put it into words. It’s really a huge mix of things coming together to say anything about a person. Just picking one feels like simplifying something super complex, but how they view others is a good start in my opinion

🍪 ooo. Uhhhh gonna go withhhhh ummmm. Hmm. Thumbprint cookies with Hershey kisses

🐶 don’t make me choose between my children

🎧 headphones are more comfy on the ears but earbuds feel less restricting and I only want restriction sometimes

🌼 “yeah, that”

🙃 uhhhhh there’s a lot of diseases that likely stemmed from europes “it’s not cannibalism if we don’t see them as people” phase

🦉 night owl but not bc I want to be bc insomnia is bigger and stronger than me and being nice to it doesn’t work

🧸 couch, bed feels too sleepy, floor is nice occasionally but reminds me of the times I didn’t have a bed which also makes it too sleepy, but couch has other uses making it just enough sleepy and not sleepy to nap

🏳️‍🌈 yes, I am genderfluid, aroace (specifically quoi for both) and I think I’m bi but I might just be a lesbian, I’m in the fence about weather I actually would like a man or not

🦋 uhhhhfff oxymoronic, (regular) moronic, uhhhh anxious

👖 idkkkk I like both kinds of comfort

🥤 I am boycotting Starbucks.

🧡 I literally have never seen a color I didn’t like

💎 this is such a tough choice 😭 I’m so attached to my worldly possessions. Ummm my teddy bear patches because I’ve had her since birth and if I lose her I will never recover from the grief

☕️ tough tough, I’m going to have to go with tea but know it was a hard decision

🦖 carolina parakeet or cephalaspis

🌙 idk, I’m so timeblind literally it could be anywhere from 2-5 years

🌴 lighter with lots of fluid. I can not make a fire by hand, but with the fire I could boil water & cook food. And assuming there are trees I can make some semblance of a blade

🐸 changes alll the time, punk goth grunge emo scene basic preppy cutesy whimsical cottagecore like I cannot just pick one you don’t understand

🔮um. So my dream job is no job, I want to see and experience and learn everything I can. And unfortunately no job fits that

💙single and scared of intimacy. I’m going to try to get therapy before a relationship, so by choice but the choice isn’t because I want to be single necessarily it’s because I want to work on myself before I’m not single. I mean I also wouldn’t really mind being single forever though, so I guess it’s a little bit of both? Well I mean I don’t want to be single but I also don’t want to not be single. I guess I’m neutral about being single but definitely don’t want to get into a relationship right now as I am. That’s a good way to put it

🌿I have this messy black knitted sweater with stars and these grey ripped straight cut jeans that look soooo good together and a black choker with a gold barbell looking thing as the clip on the front and it looks soooo good.

🎤 yes many, but none that I can think of right now

🤎 brown

💌 yes constantly, full on conversations and philosophical debates and arguments going on up there all the time

💄 occasionally, nothing too fancy yet I’m still getting into it, but I’ve come up with a lot of makeup ideas I want to try when I have the supplies and time and energy

🌸 I was wearing a very pretty purple sparkly dress with rhinestones and some gloves and a necklace and makeup and my cousin told me I looked like a 1920s flapper on an evening out

I’ll @ people later maybe probably

Anyways, that’s a lot of info about myself to put on the internet

~ 💖 ASK GAME 💖 ~

📷 What’s set as your phone’s lockscreen?

🍫 Cheese or chocolate?

✨ Do you have any nicknames?

🎵 Last song you listened to?

✏️ Have you ever written fanfiction?

😏 Are you on discord?

 💛 Do you have any piercings?

🐰 What do you think says the most about a person?

🍪 If you were a cookie, what kind would you be?

🐶 Are you more of a dog person or a cat person?

🎧 Headphones or earbuds?

🌼 What’s the last thing you said out loud?

🙃 What’s a weird fact that you know?

🦉 Are you a morning person or a night owl?

🧸 Favorite place to nap?

🏳️‍🌈 Are you a member of the LGBTQIA+ community?

🦋 Describe yourself in three words.

👖 Jeans or sweatpants?

🥤 What’s your go-to Starbucks order?

🧡 A color you can’t stand?

💎 What’s your most prized possession?

☕ Coffee or tea?

🦖 Favorite extinct animal?

🌙 How long have you been on tumblr?

🌴 Desert island item?

🐸 Describe your aesthetic.

🔮 What’s your dream job?

💙 Relationship status?

🌿 Describe your favorite outfit.

🎤 Is there a song you know all the lyrics to?

🤎 What color is your hair?

💌 Do you talk to yourself?

💄 Do you wear makeup?

🌸 Best compliment you ever received?

💞 @ your favorite blog.

Reblogs are appreciated!

[ninimuhllover]

"Tease"

Pairing:Nika mühlx!fem!reader

Request:hi pooks!! if you want tooooo can you do something for mika where reader is an acedemic weapon and mika is infatuated but doesn’t really think reader is gay because she’s so girly and nika always blushy around reader and like paige and kk always tease her??

Warnings:kinda smut?,making out,teasing,fluff,angst kinda,cursing,reader referred to as she,her,hers,no use of y/n,metion of nikas accent

How is she so gorgeous and smart at the same time thought nika while smiling at the girl she hasn't been able to stop thinking about since the first time she met her "girl" Paige said beside from beside me "what?" I said "you down bad" kk said laughing "she's not even gay" I said looking down "why don't you ask" Paige mentioned for the thousand times "no" I said fast "well she's walking over now" I whipped around and she was in front of me "hey guys" she smiled talking to us my mind went dumb as I just stared at her "um Nika about that project you wanna come to my dorm to work on it" she said "huh oh yeah s-sure" I stumble on what to say "okay I send you the room number see ya" she smiled again at me while walking away her perfume sent slowly went away she was wearing a different lip gloss today "yeah look at you!" Paige said while shaking my shoulders while laughing I smile "maybe this will make something happen between you two cause damn" kk said I rolled my eyes while walking out of class to here my phone buzz I open the notifications to see a message from her

Her: room number is 437

Me: thanks

Her: no problem

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚Time skip˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Reader pov

I put the last pillow on my bed when a knock at the door made me turn the music off and I walked to the door and open it seeing Nika on the other side nervously playing with her hands "hey come on in" I say smiling at her closing the door behind her "you can sit wherever" I say to her "she looks around the room while sitting at the door of my bed kinda awkward I hold my laugh at this I sit down by her "what were you think for the project?" I ask her she blushes "idontreallyhaveanyideas" she rushed out "huh" "I don't really have any ideas" she said slower blushing hard "oh well we could do a power point" I say "is that okay with you?" I ask "uh yeah yeah" she said fidgeting and looking anywhere but me "are you okay you seem nervous" I say putting my hand on her knee

Nika pov

Her hand on my knee sent sparks through me "yeah I'm good" I say Shakey "you don't seem like it you want a water" she said getting up "uh sure" I say she walks over to her small fridge to grab me a water bottle I look around her room noticing a small lesbian pin on a bag in the corner"here you go" she said handing me the water and I took a sip of it "thank you" I say feeling a bit better from the interaction with her hand on my knee "I'm gonna grab my bag laptop bag so we can start to work on the project"she said grabbing the bag I was looking at just a second ago sitting on the bed and pulling her laptop out "I like your pins" I say touching the one I had most interest in "oh thanks" she said while typing on her computer "where is your accent from?" She asked I blush a bit "oh I'm Croatian" I say smiling"mm I've always wanted to visit there" she says while smiling at me "yeah you'd probably like it"I say "you really like that pin" she says looking at my hand still touching the pin "oh sorry" I say moving my hand"no your good and yes if you where wondering" she said confused I said"huh" she looked at me"I am a lesbian if you were wondering" she says smiling at me "oh" I say my stomach was doing flips and I was trying to not smile to hard

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"no because she had no right to look this fine" she says as we watched the movie on her laptop "for real" I agree with her while looking at the screen when my phone went off to see a message from Paige

Paige: how long y'all gonna be freaky it's 7:45

I look at the message and see she saw it too"i don't know what she's talking about sorry" I say fast trying to put my phone down fast while looking at her. Her face flushed red "it's okay" she laughed kinda nervously "she's just talking I swear-" I was caught off by her lips touching mine and her hands on both sides of my face I felt like I was floating my hand went to her hip and my other on her neck the kiss getting heated she climbed on top of my lap sitting down while not breaking the kiss my hand moved down to her hip her hand now on my shoulders she pulled away and started to kiss down my jaw I let out a breathy moan as she kissed behind my ear "your so pretty baby" she said while kissing my neck I grabbed her face and pulled her back to my lips "your such a 𝙏𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚" I say with her lips on mine while she smiles she pulled away "I've wanted to ask for a while but will you be my girlfriend" she said "yes" I said kissing her again when my phone started to ring I pulled away reluctantly and answered

"hello"I say into the phone breathlessly

"hey I was just making sure you were still alive but it looks like I was right on the freaky part" I hear Paige say on the phone

"oh shut up" I say when she starts to laugh I hang up after saying I was okay and look back at her "hey is it okay if I stay" I ask nervously "yeah if course" she says while cuddling up to my chest I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her on the top of her head I soon hear small snores coming from her I close my eyes and fall asleep

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I walk into the gym with my bag on my arm and kk comes running up while jumping "yeah okay girlypop I see you" I blush knowing what she's talking about "shush" I say "is that what she told you last night" Paige said from beside her "maybe maybe not" I say confidently "oh okay so boom tell me what happened now" kk said laughing "nuh uh that's my information" I say while walking to the locker room "oh so that's how it is" she says while walking with me and all three of us walk into the locker room "yep that's how it is" I say laughing

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Kinda short but I loved this idea @julienbakerloverr pooks I hope this was good sorry it took a while though I didn't know how to start it but anyways ignore spelling mistakes and punctuation I hope you enjoyed it and please please request please don't copy me my work with out asking 🩷🤍

[nicegaai]

one of the things that frustrates me in fanfic is when people make some characters excessively flat. my boy norgie gets this treatment a lot i fear :( his usual traits are Mean and Mysterious Sexyman. he is those things yes but like. what if he also was a rounded person....... now i am terrible at character writing dont get me wrong. but my understanding is that he should be able to experience and express the full gamut of human emotions, and sometimes,,, all people let him be is mean or sexy or mysterious. ykwim. ive been trying to make him be in situations .... taking him out of his comfort zone and stuff

he has such FUN CHARACTER TRAITS in canon though i love base no/rway so muchhh. i wanna talk about him

hes spacey in a weird way. he has the whole supernatural vision thing going on, and den once said it would be expected of nor to binge watch slow tv for 2 days straight without moving or eating. i think he would be uncomfortable to interact with if you didnt know him and thats Funny. hes got freak vibes but hes pretty so its okay AND HES SILLY . hes SO SILLY. he has JOKES and theyre BAD and no one laughs. he would be the worst person ever to bring to a party. and um HES KIND OF A KUUDERE AND THATS SO CUTE TO ME? my dear sweet kuudere spacecase. all i want for him is a 2 year vacation to do fuck all in a remote cabin. no phone no social interaction just vibes

if she was a girl id be so scared of her bcz shes so pretty. i couldnt talk to her without choking . shes my ideal gf i think. especially if she looked exactly the same as in canon but was a lesbian. um. sorry. im going insane maybe

[saintjosie]

WAIT YOU AND JESS WEREN'T DATING BEFORE???

storytime! @pirateprincessjess

so i met jess around march 2021 because she raided me on twitch. she said she found me on tiktok and i immediately went to go check her out and followed her back. i actually remember looking at my phone during my stream and thinking, “oh she’s really cute”, following her, and then moving on with the stream.

we chat back and forth for a few months and stream together a few times and then towards the end of 2021, i found out that she only lived a few hours away from me. so i’m like, “hey! you’re nearby, wanna get together and make some videos?”

that was our first time meeting each other in person and it was also the same weekend that we filmed the skirt go spinny video! we got along so well right off the bat but we both knew that we werent ready to date for different reasons.

6 months later, in feb of 2022, jess has her orchiectomy. i had moved twice within those two months, raleigh to dallas and then from dallas to nashville, and we are on a video call late at night while she was recovering from her surgery. jess is stoned out of her mind on pain meds and all of a sudden she is like:

“are we flirting right now?”

and i’m just like 😳😳😳 UM KIND OF MAYBE YES IDK BUT ONLY IF YOURE INTO IT HAHA JUST KIDDING 😳😳😳

to which she responds “nice. you should come visit again. come any time. and i literally mean it, you can come visit ANY time”.

i’m now sweating profusely, “haha okay how about next week?”

i drive 8 hours from nashville to south carolina to help her get around the apartment while she’s recovering from her surgery and hang out with her. on the day before valentine’s day, the day before i am headed back home, we decide we are going to try dating and that we are gonna take it really slow.

for the next month we spend hours talking on facetime every day. at first a few hours a night, then five, then 10, then we are falling asleep and waking up together over facetime. then i finally get to go and visit her for a week and we finally get to have our first date. the week is too short. i weep when i have to leave. i weep on the drive home. there was nothing slow about how fast i fell for her.

a month away from jess then a week with jess. we do this for 8 more months. driving back and forth 8 hours has never been easier. we talk about moving in together but it’s too much too fast and we don’t want to be hasty uhaul lesbians. until finally my lease is up and we cave.

it’s been four months now since we’ve moved in together and it’s been absolutely incredible 🥰

[bambisgirl]

confident ; 23. we can change positions

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“are you sure you’re okay?” sunghoon asks for the tenth time since he picked you up from the party.

he brought you to the hotel near the hybe frat house, asked the receptionist for painkillers since he knew you were going to have the biggest headache of your life tomorrow morning and helped you change in one of the hotel’s bathrobes.

he was now nervously walking back and forth through the room, still panicked and shocked thinking something might’ve happened to you if he wasn't there. you were laying on the bed, enjoying how cozy the robe felt on your skin.

you nod. “yes, hoon. i’m alright, i was just a little dizzy but i’m fine now.”

he sighs. “can you tell me what happened again?”

you get up to sit on your butt as sunghoon takes a seat on the edge of the bed, carefully listening to the story again and paying attention to all of the details.

“alright so... i took an uber with jay and jake after we spent the whole day at the be:lift café. as soon as we got to the party, we saw you and heeseung in the living room and came to you guys for a bit — i swear i could cut the tension with a knife.” you remember all four of them were staring furiously at their phones, probably texting each other. “anyway, heeseung left early, i think you left too?”

“no, i was just upstairs.” he declares nonchalantly.

“right.” you mumble. “jay and jake were always beside me and made sure i was alright, they were so sweet. then these sophomores from hybe — yena whom i met at a pub a few days ago and this guy hyunjin — came to talk to me and i told the guys they could go and see their other friends for a while, i felt bad they were constantly next to me just because i’m a freshman.” sunghoon nods at your words, pleased to hear that his friends took good care of you.

“anyway, after talking to those two for a bit, heeseung told me he was going to pick me up later and i was supposed to text him— ah shit, i forgot! where’s my phone?” you start panicking and sunghoon takes your hand in his to stop you, gently stroking your knuckles with his thumb.

“don’t worry, i took care of it.” he assures you. “now go on with the story and make sure to not miss any detail.”

“yeah, so... i wanted to leave but couldn't find my keys so i texted my roommate about it, she couldn't find hers either so i thought of calling sunoo to let me sleep in their dorm room, jungwon wasn't there and they have their fourth bed empty anyway.” sunghoon only knows sunoo since he’s a freshman in his major but he heard about the other two from you. their room had four beds just like the one sunghoon and the guys were staying in and riki always joked around that he could kick either sunoo or jungwon out so you could have two beds for yourself if you ever came for a sleepover. 

“anyway, i went to the kitchen and that’s where i saw karina... um, i know her from a long time ago but i don’t think she remembers me. she was super sweet and invited me to have a drink with her and her friend, jang wonyoung from hybe—”

“ah yes, the lesbian.” 

“she’s... what?!” you blush. “she’s literally the prettiest girl i’ve ever seen, that’s definitely a win for the girls.”

sunghoon squeezes your hand a little, sign that he wants you to continue with the story.

“so while the girls were preparing the drinks, yena and ryujin joined us too!” you say cheerfully. “i like those two so much, really. we had a glass of some really sweet thing and then my close friend from school — eve showed up too! i was so shocked and happy to see her, she never goes out of her room.”

“choi yeonjun’s sister?”

“yeah, that’s her. we drank another glass together and chatted for a while, everyone was so nice. they made me feel so good and complimented me, i felt confident.” you say truthfully. “i’m not sure what happened after. jake and jay were insisting to come back to me but the girls scolded them to leave me alone because we were having a good time together, so they left again.” you continue. “that’s when it gets blurry. i wanted to text heeseung like i promised but i accidentally texted you and... here we are.” 

“that’s... a lot to process.” sunghoon shrugs. “i’m sure there was something other than alcohol in your drink. you don’t get this dazed just from getting drunk.”

“i’m fine now.” you assure him. “like, i don’t have anything at all.”

he just sighs, running a hand through his hair.

then you and sunghoon laid on the bed for a while, the dimmed lights and comfortable silence taking over the whole room.

“can you sleep with me?” you blurt out, turning your head to look at him.

“what?” he’s shocked. 

“like, in the same bed?”

“oh.” his voice cracks and he tries to hide it with a cough. “yeah, sure.” he shuffles in his seat. “you can sleep first, i’ll stay awake a bit more to see if you’re alright.”

you snuggle up to his chest, watching his eyes widen as you slowly close the gap between your bodies. he hesitates but gives up in the end and places his arm around your waist to hold you.

sunghoon is intoxicating, you think as you subtly take a sniff of his neck. the masculine cologne and the exhilarating smell of his skin is the perfect combination.

without thinking too much, you raise your head a little and lean in, taking sunghoon by surprise as you gently press your lips on his.

for a few seconds he’s completely frozen, not comprehending what’s going on. you just kissed him.

he reciprocates the kiss for a minute, wanting to at least taste a little bit of you before pulling away. you frown.

“don’t you like kissing me?”

“i do. i really do. but we shouldn’t be doing this while you’re in this state, y/n.” his eyes are sincere and regretful. “believe me, i’d love to... but not like this. plus, you rejected me—”

“i didn’t reject you?”

“you did. you told heeseung you only see me as a friend and that i’m a notorious playboy.” your words are encrypted in his brain.

“that doesn't mean i’m rejecting you. i wasn't sure on what i want but... now i just want to kiss you.” you’re honest; no strings attached, just a little bit of kissing.

sunghoon’s stomach does a flip.

“if you’ll still want this when you wake up, i’ll let you kiss me all day long.” he gulps. “but not when god knows what was in your drink. i don’t want you to regret it.” he would rather die than know you only kissed him because you were confused and that you were going to regret it later. 

“fine.” you reply and he puts his arm under your head, hugging you tighter.

“good night, y/n. i won’t let go of you any sooner so just tell me if you feel hot so we can change positions.”

you know he refers to the position you’re sleeping in but can’t help to let out a snort. “yeah, good night sunghoon.”

he softly pecks your nose before you fall into deep slumber.

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PAIRING. enhypen hyung line x fem!reader (ft. enhypen x reader)

SYNOPSIS. after graduating high-school and having a major glow-up over summer, you became more confident in yourself and got the title of the most popular girl at decelis university in your first week of freshman year. you instantly dethroned all of the sophomore girls, on top of being so pretty, kind, smart and sexy… girl you have it all. yet you’re still the same kind, naïve and funny y/n that can’t refuse anyone coming her way. after all, you know what they say… confidence is the sexiest thing a girl can have but kindness is key!

GENRE. college au, social media au with written parts, humor, romance, fluff, angst, suggestive, smut